Christmas in Denmark Part 2: Get Yourself an Elf Hat

Hi, and welcome to the How to Live in Denmark podcast. I'm Kay Xander Mellish. I've been living in Denmark so long now, I sometimes lose perspective. I forget what it's like not to live in Denmark. Specifically, I forget that in most countries, adult men and women don't want to walk around in an elf hat, even if it is Christmas time. In Denmark, the red and white elf hat is part of any Christmas activity where alcohol is involved, and a few where it isn't. Children occasionally wear the elf hats, which are called nissehue in Danish. At my daughter's school pageant, the girls will wear long white gowns and carry candles for the Santa Lucia procession, and the boys will wear elf hats. But you're more likely to see an elf hat on an adult, quite possibly on your boss or your professor or someone else you're supposed to respect. Wearing an elf hat as a grown-up in Denmark is the way to show you've got a sense of humor about yourself, that you're up for a party, that you see the fun in Christmas, or that you can see any fun in life at all after 4 weeks of nonstop gray skies and rain during Danish November. Elf hats will be out in force during the Danish corporate Christmas party season. You'll see them on the dance floor and quite possibly see 2 of them making out in the printer room. Danish corporate Christmas parties get pretty wild, which is why movers say their big season is December and January. One half of a couple misbehaves at the corporate Christmas party and the movers are there the next weekend. Anyway, elf hats got me in trouble one year when I was trying to make a corporate video at Carlsberg showing how our Danish division worked together with our French division to make a special Christmas beer. The Danish team, including the executives, all wanted to be festive and wear elf hats, so I asked the French team if they would too. Let's just say the French people did not want to wear an elf hat. I don't think I've ever seen angrier French people in my life. But anyway, elf hats are not the only sign Danish Christmas is on the way. There are braided hearts. Braided hearts are the little red and white paper ornaments that look like tic-tac-toe patterns. You're supposed to braid them together with your friends at a heart braiding afternoon and then use them to decorate your home or your tree. Another sign is the Christmas calendar on Danish TV. The Christmas Calendar is a heartwarming show with a new episode every day during the Christmas season, which all your Danish colleagues will watch and be talking about. I have never watched one, and this disturbs the Danes around me because it's supposed to be a communal experience. One of the other mothers at school questioned whether or not my daughter was being properly raised if she couldn't watch the Christmas Calendar on TV. One more Christmas experience you may be having is a little letter from the Danish post office. Telling you that friends and family from abroad have sent you a Christmas present. The little letter will say that if the present is worth more than 340 crowns, you need to pay 25% Danish value-added tax on it, plus 2.5% customs, plus the 150-crown administrative fee. Now you could have avoided this by having your family buy online from somewhere in the EU, like amazon.co.uk, but now it's too late. And unless you want Grandma's hand-knit sweater to be returned to her, marked rejected, you're gonna have to go pick up the package and pay. The package can conveniently be picked up at a warehouse on the outskirts of town. You and your money will follow the signs down a dusty concrete staircase to some odd office in the basement to find a wizened old postal clerk. And there's a good chance he'll be wearing an elf hat. And that's the How to Live in Denmark podcast for this week. Check out our feature, Top 10 Mistakes Danes Make in English, on our sister site, kxmgroup.dk. It's been very popular. Or go to the website for this podcast, howtoliveindenmark.com, to leave a comment. This week's podcast has been sponsored by KXM Group. We make you look good in English. Music arranged by George Garvis. See you next week. Hej! Remember, the How to Live in Denmark book is available for download on amazon.com. You can read it on any phone or tablet. All you need is the Kindle app, and the Kindle app is free. The book's not free, but it's not very expensive either. If you read the book and enjoy it, please leave a review on your local version of amazon.com. It helps other people find the book and find the podcast.