If I Could Do It All Again! The beliefs that were holding me back from success!

What's up, guys? Welcome to Pelvibiz Podcast. I'm your host, Kelly Alhui. Today I want to talk about some beliefs that I had that I feel like really kept me poor, in debt, feeling hopeless, and I felt like I couldn't get out of the cycle ever. And the only thing that was going to get me out of the cycle if I had more hours in my day. And the reality was I just couldn't get more hours in my day or take on another job because my health was failing and I just couldn't. And I didn't know that there was other ways. So today I'm going to kind of break down and see if you guys agree with me on this kind of the thoughts that I was feeling before. You know, I built a seven figure practice. I always. So just to give you a little backstory, I grew up with a mom that was a teacher. My dad was in the secret service, but he wasn't really around. And my parents were divorced and I didn't grow up at all with a wealthy family at all. My mom was single mom, three kids doing whatever to make ends meet. I remember her sitting us down at the kitchen table and she had Monopoly money and she was like, okay, guys, like, this is, this is like the reality of the situation. Like, it's about this amount of money to pay our rent, it's this amount of money to pay for groceries, this amount of money to pay for, you know, your cheerleading uniform, this amount of money to pay for a football uniform, blah, blah, blah. And I remember her having no more Monopoly money. And I think it really stuck with me because I was just like, oh my God, like, how are we going to continue to live in this house? How are we going to survive? And my mom wasn't trying to like, scare me. She was just trying to show us because I'm sure we were probably being like, well, I want this just like all my other friends. And I think she was probably just trying to show us, like, hey, this is the reality of the situation and this is where we're at. And I always had a belief that rich people were greedy because I never grew up around rich people. I didn't even know what rich people like. I was, I had no friends that were rich and I just didn't understand it. And I thought, okay, well, if you, if you want to get rich, you have to work hard and you have to kind of get lucky, you know. And so I always looked at, well, rich people just take a lot of money from people. So that's what I thought. That's actually not the case more than now. And I do have rich friends now. The more I'm around rich people, they're the actually most giving people I've ever met, no joke. And that's why they're rich, because they give a lot, which also means that they put out a lot, just so you guys know. So I had to let go of that belief that rich people are greedy, so potentially one day I could build wealth. Okay. I also had to let go of a belief that, well, I worked for eight years, I'm a PT, this is the average salary, and we're making $85,000. Like, this is it. This is what I'm going to make. And like, that was just a system. And you either accept it or you don't, or you get out of the field and do something else. Right? And so my belief was, well, I'm not supposed to make more than $85,000 because no one else does at the level, you know, or at the level that I'm at or at the how many years mark that I'm at or whatever else. So I guess I'm good. And I realized that wasn't helpful because it kept me stuck and in the system and on the same cycle. So that wasn't a good belief to have. Instead, why didn't I say, oh, I can make $100,000? Like, why don't I tell myself that? So I said, oh, 85, that's good. I'm good with that because everyone else makes that. So if you're thinking that right now, please surround yourself with other people that are maybe not a physical therapist or an OT or a chiropractor, whatever else. Like, please surround yourself with some people that make a decent amount of money so you can start seeing how their brain works and what they say to themselves. I believe that also, too, that rich people had a lot of problems. What did they say? More money, more problems. Right. More money, more problems. My husband still believes this, by the way, but some that can be true somewhat. Okay, You. You just have. I say, I don't think. More problems. You have different problems. Rich people have different problems than when you're poor. When you don't have money, your problem is, oh, my gosh, how am I going to pay rent? I'm about to live in a tent. Okay, that is a major problem. Okay. Been there. Okay. Oh, my God, I don't have money. How am I going to go to the grocery store this week? Been there. Okay, should I go to Sam's club and eat the food there, and that's just what I'm going to eat for the day. Been there. Or am I going to go to a random meetup and get the pizza that they have because it's free? Been there. Okay? Or am I going to go to Aldi and be on a tight budget or Walmart and I can spend $30 this week on my groceries? Been there, too. Okay? Like, all those things are real, and that is real real. But when you have money, the problems that occur are just different. You maybe have problems that you're like, how now do I pay my staff? That's a problem, too. Doesn't mean that one's, you know, better or less than or not or whatever. It just is like, okay, well, how do I pay my staff? That's a problem. Because now you got other people to care about. It's not just you. So, you know, I would personally rather have how to pay my staff issues than, oh, my God, how am I going to pay my rent or how am I going to eat issues. But, you know, both of them are problems. You're always going to have problems. Okay? You're always going to have problems. But if you're someone that's thinking right now, well, rich people have a lot of problems. I don't want to be rich. It's actually a very big false belief that you have to get over to allow yourself to grow into a person that you're trying to become. Okay? I also, like, you know, my mom was a teacher, but. And my dad was secret Service, but they never showed me even how to open a bank account. We didn't even talk about how to save money. We didn't even talk about money because money in our household was something that was scarce. And it was like, oh, gosh, like, please don't talk about that because we don't have any. So why we want to talk about it? There was nothing to talk about. We didn't. There was no savings. There was no. There's nothing. So I didn't learn money management. I didn't learn even what a credit card was. I didn't get a credit card until I was, like, almost 30 years old. Not crazy, really, because no one even taught me that. I was like, no, let me just try to use a debit card because, like, I don't want any debt because I heard debt's really bad. Even though I had $230,000 student loan debt, I just had no concept of money because I wasn't around. It no one even talked about it in my family. So if this is you and this is resonating with you, like, I've been there. I really have been there. Okay, most of you guys are probably more literate than I was, but your parents did talk about it. But this was how I grew up. And these are all my beliefs around what? Well, it's okay to be poor. I'm going to stay poor. I also didn't know what even an investment was. I didn't even know the difference between rich being rich and being wealthy. Rich people have money, but they also spend a lot of money. Wealthy people have something called assets. They start to build things that compound and give whatever they invest in is producing money back to them. That's called wealth. Rich people just go out and buy a Lamborghini, and that Lamborghini is giving no return on their investment. So I didn't even know the simple concept of this stuff. And probably some of you guys listening to this podcast, it's probably like, wow, that's new news to me too. So I'm like, investing. What the heck is investing? That seems overwhelming. I got to now figure out the stock market. I got it now. Bonds and what? Like, that's like words. That's like a foreign language to me. So it's like, eh, I don't need to figure that out. I'll stay poor. It's fine. That seems way too overwhelming, you know? Is anyone with me? Anyone with me? I also thought, like, well, let me just try to save more money. But here's the reality. Saving money literally wasn't an option. I'll buy you guys. But it was not an option. I came out of school making 62k, which by the time, taxes and all that, I was probably making 40k a year. Okay. I had this moldy apartment that I lived in with my husband, and he's a PT as well. And a paycheck and half went to our student loans. Now this is the minimum loan payment that we can make. A paycheck and a half. He's also a PT with the same amount of debt as me. So he had debt, I had debt and a paycheck, and a half of mine went to my loans, and a paycheck of half of his went to his loans. So I remember had $500 left over. So imagine on $500 trying to pay rent, trying to buy groceries and do anything on like, you know, it's just. It's really impossible. $500 a month to live on. That's not including Your rent, it doesn't work. So then I got the broad idea because no one taught me how to, you know, build wealth or invest or anything like that. I said, well, I have energy, so why don't I go and get another job? So I did, and I went. And I was a personal trainer for these very wealthy people in their homes. And I would go at like, 6, 7am and train them in their homes, and they'd pay me, like, 50 bucks an hour. And I'm like, oh, my God, yes. I'm like, this is amazing. I'm building. I'm getting rich. Like, I can eat now. And I started to do that, and then I was like, well, this works out well. Maybe I'll go connect with more people that have money at these private clubs in Buckhead in Atlanta, and I'll teach Pilates. And so I was a member. I wasn't a member. I was a Pilates instructor at these private clubs that to be a member at, you had to pay, like, $150,000 a year just to be a part of the club. And then you had to spend, like, $7,000 a month on, like, golf and stuff like that. So I was like, okay, well, these are people I want to be around, so let me go hang out with them and then let me try to pick their brain. So I started doing that. I started making money with that because they paid well, because these people clearly paying well to. To the club. So they paid me well. But then that still wasn't enough. I then was like, well, Atlanta's starting to get known for the movie industry. And this was like, I don't know, 10 years ago when they were all moving from LA to Atlanta because the tax breaks, and there was over 30 films being produced every single month in Atlanta. And I was like, while I live where all these people are coming in by, so I could walk to their hotels. I was like, okay, let me stop. Start a concierge business to these hotels. And it took me about six months. I had to, like, wear down the doorman. Like, hey, every single day I'd walk to work and, like, pass these hotels. So every single day I'd be trying to talk to them. And finally I got in with one of them, and they called me to start working on a prince that came in from another country. I did a really good job, and he really liked me. And so he was like, hey, you need to keep this person on. Like, she did a really good job. And then they started referring me to all the celebrities, and then the Celebrities referred me to other celebrities and it goes on and on. So I would go at nighttime, so I'd be in clinic from like seven to three, like a normal PT clinic. And then I would go and treat people from like five or six to like three o' clock in the morning on movie sets and big mansions in Buckhead. And I would be there until like three o' clock morning. My husband's calling me, like, where are you? What's going on? I'm like, I'm still waiting on these people to show up because they're still on set. If I was at a mansion or maybe I was on set and I'm waiting for them to finish up. They don't sleep, by the way. These people do not sleep. So I did that. And clearly, as you probably took a guess, I did that for like four years. I got very burnt out. I had very little sleep. I was also like the clinical director of my clinic, of course, right. And I was seeing 18 patients a day at the clinic. I don't know how I did it all. I really don't know how I did it all. But it was truly out of necessity because I had to just try to pay rent, eat. It wasn't like I was doing anything crazy. I wasn't going on any fancy trips. I could not even afford a fancy trip. My husband and I actually made a deal with each other that we could just go on one vacation a year. And it was for two days. And so that's all we could afford. And mind you, he was working full time at an outpatient orthopedic, and on the weekends he was working at a skilled nursing facility to try to have money as well. And so that's what we did. Like, we just thought more jobs would help us out. But what did that leave us with? Left us still broke. Okay? Still no money in our bank account because whatever we had coming in, we just had to spend because we like, needed it. We needed it to live, like, for real. Like, there was no savings. That's what I was trying to get at. There's no savings savings here because we weren't exceeding or we weren't, you know, getting enough in the door for what our living situation was. And it wasn't even like we were living large, trust me. We were, like I said, leaving this moldy, moldy apartment, one bedroom apartment that just, I look back and I'm like, okay, how? We had furniture from my dad's, like, grandpa. I mean, we covered it up with like those, those sheets, you know, oh, it was just, you know, it's just what you do when you first get out of school. It's just what you do, okay? Live through all that. So, you know, but my point is, is I just thought more jobs just to make ends meet, but I wasn't even thinking about trying to build. Be rich or build wealth whatsoever. I was just trying to live paycheck to paycheck, because that's what grew up with. So why would I do anything differently? You know? And some of you guys may be in the same situation. And so saving more for me in that situation was not an option because there was nothing to save. And I basically had a belief, too, that if I replaced my income, which means I would have to see, like, eight patients a week, that I'm good. That's as. That's as far as I want to go. And when I get on the phone calls with you guys, too, I hear this actually a lot, because no one's ever told us that we could do more. No school has ever taught us this. No. Most of our parents probably have not said this to us. I was like, all I need to do see eight patients a week. And that sounded like a dream coming from 14 patients a day. Like, you mean eight patients a week? Like, I can easily do that. Like, hello? Okay, yeah, eight patients a week. I could replace my income. And that was all I wanted. I just wanted to get out of the job that I absolutely hated, and I just needed to see eight patients a week. And so I was like, that's my goal. But here's what people didn't tell me. They didn't tell me that, Kelly, you should dream bigger. You should think bigger. That's as far as the dream went. I see eight patients. I'm good. I made it. Wow. If I look back at that belief, that's a crazy belief that I would say to myself, like, I made it. If I have eight patients, I made it. I have a business. The reality is, I did not actually have a business. I had a job that I created for myself that I liked, but I was still in the rat race of doing the same thing over and over and over and over and over again. And so it's like, how do I build an actual company? I always say there's a difference between Pelvi Job and Pelvi Biz. Pelvi Biz is where you actually create an asset that's called wealth. Pelvi Job is where, like, I was just talking about, you see eight patients a week. You're like, I'm good. This is high as I want. Because you don't understand the vision of what can be had beyond yourself. Because it seems so overwhelming. It seems too much. Seems like, oh my God, like I don't have to do all these things. I don't have to get uncomfortable. Ah, it's too much. Like that's what your brain does. That's what my brain did, too. But when I was able to get out of my own way and fight all these money beliefs and fight the belief that I'm going to stay poor, I mean, the sky is the limit. You can do whatever the heck you want. I mean, really, you can. Like, my number one goal was to be able to have a house in California. And I was able to do that for my 38th birthday. Bought myself a house, California. And let me tell you, it wasn't without. Not. It wasn't without a lot of work, okay? A lot, a lot, a lot, a lot, a lot of work, okay? But was it worth it? 100%. 100%. So you could have whatever you want. But if someone told me 15 years ago when I graduated that Kelly, you could have a seven figure practice, you could have your dream home, I would say you're nuts. Because the current situation that I was in was horrendous. Shopping at Walmart, not knowing where my food is going to come from, not knowing if I was going to be living in a tent for real, guys, this is for real, okay? Not knowing if I was going to be living in a tent or going to be actually have a house. Not being able to afford to buy a house for eight to nine years because there was no way we could even afford a down payment on a house. Asking our parents for money. Well, not mine, because mine didn't have any, but my husband, okay, like, doing all the hard things, experiencing all things. Like, I remember I was in Portland. I wasn't even able to come back for Christmas because I couldn't even afford the plane ticket to go see my family in Atlanta. Meanwhile, my dad's still sick. It was horrible being in the car at a skilled nursing facility. These ladies are like, stop coming in my room. Like, you didn't come at my time. And I just wanted to quit right there. I remember FaceTiming my family and they're all around the Christmas tree, like, having so much fun. And I'm like, man, I'm not there because I can't afford it. Know how much pain that is? It's a lot of pain. So use the pain. Like, use the pain to make a change. We're about to leave for Atlanta. This is, you know, for Christmas. And, man, just bringing me back to that, it was horrible. It was literally horrible. Where you could not be with your family because you could not afford the flight back. And I'm fortunate enough now I get to take my dog, my husband, and I get to go see my family. And just that makes it so worth it. So I'm telling you guys, if you're struggling, if you need help, if you're like, man, I got these beliefs in my head, and I don't know how to get rid of them. I don't know how to get past it, reach out, because this is where I was at. And this is why my mission is so big to help you guys, because all the freaking struggle I went through is I don't want you guys to do the same. And it kills me when I get on these calls with you guys. You guys are telling me the exact same thing that I used to feel. That's why we got to make a change for 20, 25. So let's get after it, guys. Bye. Bye.