A first-person YouTube talk by Korina Lymnioudi describing how she overcame social anxiety and became confident in social settings. She recounts a formative incident at age 15 in a coffee shop where she contrasted an outgoing schoolmate and a silent girl; inspired by that moment and by the book Conversations with God she consciously chose to become outgoing. She traces her fear of speaking to childhood violence and repeated criticism from her father about not being good enough, explains a specific fear about how her voice would sound, and describes practicing speaking aloud and becoming "the soul of the party" afterward.
Chapters
I remember when I was 15 years old and we were with some schoolmates in a coffee shop. And back then, because I had a very bad childhood full of violence, I was afraid to talk. But I think I haven't realized that until then. And that day as we sit in the coffee shop, I see one schoolmate who stands up from the table and starts to move hands and starts to explain story of his and what has happened to him. And he was so full of energy and he was describing everything and I was, oh my God, I would like to be like him so much. I like what I see now, you know, in front of my eyes why I can't be like him. And on the other side of the table is a girl, she. Girl who never talks, never moves. She's like that all the time. No, she's standing still all the time. And every, everybody from the company was thinking that this girl has a problem with her mind, that he, she is retarded. Everybody, all the, all the kids thought that this girl is retarded. So at that moment I have an insight. I realized that this girl is not retarded. Back then we were sure that says, okay, now we know, we know her says at our company even. And she's healed. So she's very, very normal and very energetical person. But back then we were sources retarded. So I have this inside. Oh my God, this girl is not retarded. She's scared. She's scared to talk like me. So I see both of them. I see the one guy who's keep moving and explaining and describing his story. And I see the other girl houses sit like that. And I say to myself, oh my God, Corina, you have to decide who you are going to be from now on. You want to be him or you're going to be here decide. Do you want to be the retarded person who is afraid to talk or you want to be him who enjoys to talk and you know, he's the soul of the company. So I decided at that moment to become that. I just have chosen who I want to be. You know the book Conversations with God, all these pages say you can choose who you want to be. But no one ever, no one understands that. Everybody reads the book says, oh, what a nice book. But no one does that. After reading this book, you have to do this exercise, guys. You have to say who I going to be and become that person that you want to be in just one second like that, you know, you change it like that. So I wondered, I asked myself, why you can't be the person you want? Why you can't talk? Try to talk now. Try to talk now. I said to myself, you know, 50 years old, I said to myself, try to talk now. I couldn't. I couldn't. And I realized that I am so scared to talk that I am worried how the sound of my voice will sound to the other people. Even that. And I realize at that moment that this comes from how my father is behaving to me. Because he was telling me all the time, you're not good enough. You're not good enough. What is this that you are doing? That you are doing? And I came to a point where I was scared how my voice will sound. So at that moment, I said, okay, is me in charge of myself? I'm not a robot. I decide right now to hear the sound of my voice. Let's see. Let. Let's have these people say how my voice sounds. So I start talking. I say only this at the beginning. Hey, guys. Yes, they are like this. I saw their eyes that they want me to talk. They want to know what I have inside me. So that was it. I said, okay, let my father alone. I will start now to be the person that I want to be. And the second in one second in the day, I started to describe to them a story of mine, you know, something that has happened to me and since then. I am the soul of the party. I'm the soul of the company. You understand? So it's just like that. It's so simple.
