P2 V2 Renovate Yourself Renovate Your Wealth Two Paths Available

Two mental pathways shape your financial reality: one driven by reservations and past stories, one by positive expectations. The host shares how childhood scarcity and a "loyalty tax"—giving away earnings to avoid seeming rich—locked him into the reservation path, then guides you through a listening exercise to identify your own money story.
Chapters
And what I would really love to share with you now is the second premise. So as I said, premises are just working assumptions. Premises are just something that, you know, we. We work with until, you know, it may or may not be proven right or wrong. And so this second premise that I really want to introduce you to is the fact that we've. We've already acknowledged and we've become kind of aware of that there's a default path, there is a way of operating. And what I believe is that there are two paths, and one is based on your reservations, and the other is based on your positive expectations, and the one with the most influence becomes your reality. Now, if I just tie you back to the original conversation we had earlier. If we think about this personal, you know, asset sheet we have, you know, the, the assets and the liabilities that we have operating, you know, we have these assets and these positive expectations and the things that we want to be able to achieve that, you know, we are always looking for. And we have inner wealth that allows us to put an energy there that goes for it. But then we also have these liabilities, these limitations, these reservations, these stories from the past. The old operating system, this is constantly just being reinforced. The easy way to do things, the unconscious way that we just turn up every single day. So I want us to become aware of the two paths that we have, both the reservations and then this vision for what you really want with the. The expectations of what wealth can be for you and, you know, and maybe, just maybe being aware of that second path that allows us to navigate and choose it. And so in this next kind of section, what I really want you to do is recognize that there possibly is, you know, this reservation, this wealth set point. And if you actually are aware of it and you understand where it's come from, which is what we've just looked at, you have the choice to take it to a different place. And it's really around our perceptions of wealth. And I know, you know, some of this can often be very difficult to engage with. And we might think, I had a great childhood. Nothing really went wrong. I survived. Everyone surviving. I was in survival mode. We had a, you know, we had some highs and we had some lows, and we had some good times and everything kind of worked out. You know, there's nothing there for me. But what I found is that when you start listening to other people's stories, often what happens is it actually gives a reflection of what's really happening for you as well. And, you know, I alluded to the, the, the case earlier that, you know, often it's our thoughts or maybe our feelings about things. You know, driving through the suburb and feeling, you know, angry for people who have wealth or, you know, feeling that people have done something bad or illicit to get money. And that's, you know, that's, it makes you bad if you have money. So, you know, there's all of these things that are coming up and you know, in what I'd like to show you now is it's kind of through a few little exercises, ways that we can help kind of identify what is coming up. Because I think this perception of wealth is really based on this, you know, pre programmed operating loop that we just constantly in and we're just constantly living and it's hard to break out of it. We have, you know, the synapses in our brains that are wiring all the time. We have, you know, this, this kind of rut in the road that's just being worn down. It's familiar, it's easy. And you know, I know that, you know, when I was growing up in the 70s, born in 1970, you know, the average income was really low. It was like in Australia it was like $120 a week. And you know, my father was a farm manager and my parents never had their own home. And the most extraordinary thing is that right at this very moment, my dad's just turned 80 last month and my mother's 76. They're about to buy their first home next month. Right. So, you know, it just goes to show you that you this, this is kind of how I grew up. I, you know, this is just your money. We didn't have money. We never had our own home. Every home we lived in, we lived in as if it was our own home. It was never who owned what. But you know, when I was very, very small, you know, two or three, we had one of those old bathtubs that actually had a water heater at the end of the bathtub. And, and my dad, he'd bring home the pay packet at the end of the week and he was getting a lot less than 120 a week as a farm manager. And this old burner at the end of the bathtub had a wood chip in it, wood chip heater. And one day they found me with this little packet of money that dad had with these two dollar notes and I was feeding them into the wood chip going. And in Australia the old $2 notes had sheep on them and I was just putting them into the wood chip. Going, bye bye Babas. Bye bye Babas. And I was just saying goodbye to the little sheep and by the time time they came in I had burnt the entire pace, the whole pay packet for the week. And they were living like week to week. And I was just like, what's going on? I was like, oh, I'm just saying goodbye to the bar bars, which was my work shapes and you know, my other stories that came up. I mean, by the age of eight, you know, we were living in, in town at that stage and mum used to give us like $0.20 or $0.50 to go down to the shops to get milk or bread. And I felt that it was an absolute failure on my part if I couldn't spend every cent. So I'd get the, you know, 20 cents worth of milk or 30 cents worth of milk. If I had 10 cents left over, I would have to spend it. And so I would regularly come home with these half de tomato plants that, you know, we're never going to be planted, we're going to die. But I have fulfilled my mission of actually getting rid of every single cent. Like I literally was someone who was getting rid of money on my family's behalf very, very regularly. And you know, I know that because my parents kind of were always, you know, not that we weren't aware that we, you know, didn't have money, but they were always, you know, doing things to have a second job or do and what. My dad worked like six and a half days a week as a farm manager on a farm and the other half a day a week he worked on the farm in a little paddock that he had to have a market garden. So he grew like watermelons and cucumbers and rock melons. And what would happen is he'd go and sell it to the shop. So we were, you know, pretty much there catching watermelons and rock melons and packing them and, and helping out with, with that. And I remember he used to give us some of them to sell at the front of the street that we lived on and we were quite close to town and as soon as we would sell a watermelon, a rockmelon or cucumber, we would run with the money next door to the chemist and buy lollies. So, you know, as soon as we made money we'd get rid of it. As soon as I was given money, I would burn it, you know, so I really had these, like, I didn't, I did. Money just flew through my fingers and to the extent that, you know, When I went to university, got a scholarship, got money, I felt so guilty about having money. And I was looking at this money and I was earning like, you know, $10,000 a year as a uni student, scholarship, and my dad was earning like $24,000 a year, working six and a half days a week. And I felt so guilty that I gave money away. So I would give my parents money, I'd fund my mom's business, I'd take them on their first holidays. So I had no cash. I was still just getting rid of money and these money pat, just playing out, just playing out, just playing out. And it got to the extent that when I finished university, or even when I was at university, my friends went on scholarships and they were always struggling. And so I'd be the one who would buy, you know, get the taxi on the way home or the first round of bees or whatever that was. And when I finished uni, four years at uni, for one reason or another, most of my friends didn't finish at the same time and did an extra year. And they, you know, they had trouble renting my room out because they're like, well, you know, we're all friends. We don't really want to rent someone we don't know. And I felt so bad for them. And I was earning money, so I rented their room in a house that was 300km away from where I lived because I didn't want them to not have, you know, a good lifestyle. And because I was earning so much money, I didn't want them to judge me of someone having money and being different from them. And, you know, I was almost like I charged myself a loyalty tax because I didn't want to be separate. And so I was always giving this money away. I was always giving it away. I didn't want to be different to anyone else and I didn't want to be judged to being rich. You know, as a mining engineer, at graduating, you know, in 1992, I graduated on $80,000 Australian a year. Like, you know, I was graduated, graduated on three times more than my parents household income kind of thing. So I felt that there was this real separation. And I didn't buy myself new cars or anything, but I spent the money, you know. And I remember reading rich dad, Poor dad, and he said, do you work for your money or is your money work for you? And I thought, that's just stupid. Of course I work for my money. I go and earn this money and I spend it and I spend a little bit more each Week I've got this credit card. And then I had to go back to work. And I didn't have my money working for me, but I was conscious of the fact that I was all, I was earning an extraordinary income, but I always just had enough because I was pretty much burning through my money, which I had done at a two year old. Like I was burning money as a two year old. I was still doing it. 28, right. And, you know, this is seeing these kind of patterns that were coming up. And, you know, you may have heard of the Matthew effect, and it's from the Bible, but it's been proven scientifically and it says to those that have much will get more, and those who have little will lose it all. And may as well being called the Jane effect, because I was living proof of this. You know, I was given much and I was like losing it completely. And, you know, for me, this was a story that was running from my past. And if I'm honest myself, you know, I had this perception of wealth and I shared with some of you earlier in a breakout room, you know, when we moved to Dubbo and you know, my mom was just, you know, getting to know people and making friends. And we were at school, so we were making friends pretty quickly. And I remember we were at mass one night and this lady came running up to her after mass and said, oh my goodness. And we'd been there about six months and she had no friends at that stage. She said, I can't believe that you're related to a doctor. I thought you were just an ordinary slacksmith. Oh, I'd love to have you over for morning tea. And I could. I was just so shocked that there was a hierarchy based on the fact my uncle was a doctor and therefore it was okay to associate. And so at that stage I set this story that people who were above everyone else or created something that was, you know, a difference of standards. They were just, you know, evil and mean and horrible. And I'd never do that. So if I just gave my money away, you know, I wouldn't be one of those people. And so I could see these stories coming up now in reflection, but at the time, I was living it right. And whenever I would see someone who was a little bit better than everyone else, I would judge them as being not nice. When I had, you know, I was creating a course to sell people on renovating their home, I was like, well, everyone else is selling them for $7,000. I want to be nice. I'll make it 3,000 I'm going to make hardly any money out of it and I'll sell millions of dollars worth of them, but I'm not going to make money nice. You know, they're not going to think I'm, you know, different to everyone else. And so I can actually see these stories, right? This burning through the money was coming up and it wasn't until I really had this awareness and I can look back now, I'm like. But I did have strong emotions that came up that actually were the signposts all through that time of me going, oh, I don't want people to judge me. I don't want to be excluded, I don't want to be unloved. I don't want to, I don't want to be separate. There's a loyalty tax I have to pay to be accepted, to be like everyone else, and that's to not have money. And so by, by being aware of these beliefs now or being aware of the thoughts that come up when I hear stories or live my own. But it's often easier when you hear other people's stories. Then you know, it gives you a sense of where your money story is coming from. So what I would love us to do now is just to take a moment and I'm going to read you a story. It's a made up story, but I'm going to read you a story and I want you to complete the exercise with me in just, you know, listening to the story. Maybe, you know, you can turn off your video if you want and close your eyes and just listen and, and I'll get you to just, you know, just acknowledge the thoughts and feelings that come up as I read it and get a sense of what's coming up for you. And we can analyze it later, but as it comes up, you might just write down some notes of what's coming up for you. But I think it's really important that sometimes we just recognize it's hard to see our own stories. But by acknowledging the thoughts and feelings that come up when we actually hear other people's stories, it actually helps us to work out where we're coming from. So if everyone's okay, I'll get you to just get comfortable and just bring yourself into the moment of just being aware and setting the intention of just being aware of the thoughts and feelings that come up when I just read this story to you.
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