1057 Candace Parker: Habits & Mindset of Winning, Lessons from Kobe Bryant + Being an Athlete & Mom

This is episode number 1057 with two time Olympic gold medalist and WNBA superstar Candace Parker.

You know, I definitely think your environment shapes your upbringing. I don't think you understand love until you have a child.

Welcome to the School of Greatness.

My name is Lewis Howes, a former.

Pro athlete turned lifestyle entrepreneur.

And each week we bring you an inspiring person or message to help you discover how to unlock your inner greatness. Thanks for spending some time with me today. Now let the class begin. Vince Lombardi once said, winning isn't everything, but wanting to win is. And Terry Goodkind said, if the road is easy, you're likely going the wrong way. My guest today is WNBA superstar and two-time Olympic gold medalist Candace Parker. And Parker is an impressive human being. She has won a WNBA championship, two WNBA Most Valuable Player Awards, WNBA Finals MVP Award, WNBA All-Star Game MVP, two Olympic gold medals, and the WNBA Rookie of the Year. She has also been selected to six All-WNBA teams and five All-Star teams, and was the first player to win the Rookie of the Year and the WNBA most valuable player award in the same season. She is the definition of a winner. As a mother and a black woman, Candace has developed into a bold, insightful and inspiring thought leader who is passionate about the importance of women's rights, voters rights and black lives matter. With her heart, passion and competitiveness, Candace is an inspiring role model for so many. And it was such a treat to have her on this show. And in this episode, we discuss how Candace developed a winner's mindset, if there's any way to have success without adversity in our lives, how she deals with negative emotions. We also talk about the lessons that Kobe Bryant taught her and the most impactful moment she had with him, what it was like being a mom early in her WNBA career, what athletes can do moving forward to support racial equality, what she's learned from motherhood and the biggest lessons her daughter has taught her about life, why she you would not participate in another Olympics and so much more. But before we get into this, I want to let you know that I just launched my Greatness Coaching Program and I'm so excited about this. We built this for the successful entrepreneur in mind to be your high performance system for 2021 and beyond. It includes coaching and accountability, community, and my new Greatness Playbook where you'll reflect plan, and create short-term and long-term visions for your life and business. This program is not for everyone, so if you join Greatness Coaching or not, creating high performance systems will be the biggest thing you do to set yourself up for success in 2021 and beyond. And if you want to see if you are the right fit, then go to lewishouse.com/mycoach to apply. And while you're listening to this episode with Candace, Make sure to share this with someone you think would be inspired by her message and her story as well. You can just copy and paste the link wherever you're listening to this episode or go to lewishouse.com/1057 and share that link out with your friends right now. Also post this on social media and make sure to tag Candace as well so she can know that you're listening to her and send her some love over on social media. Okay, in just a moment, the one and only Candace Parker.

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[Save Related Information] Welcome back everyone to the School of Greatness. Very excited about our guest Candace Parker in the house. So glad that you're here. I've been a big fan of you, what you represent, your dedication and commitment over the years of excellence and greatness. And I want to start with the winner's mentality because I think you obviously you have it. You've been a winner your whole life. And I'm curious, what does it take in your mind to develop a winner's mentality even when you're not winning?

I honestly think it's like the obstacles and the barriers. I was fortunate enough to grow up in an amazing environment at home. My parents, both my parents were there every game, every play, every everything. And honestly, I feel like I was really lucky from that standpoint. But when I got to college, I think in some ways, in some areas, because things were So, quote unquote perfect in a way that might have hindered my tenacity and my, you know, ability to know if I could get over obstacles. And so, you know, when I got--.

You- had too much love making.

I think I had a little too much love yourself.

There was not enough adversity.

There was not enough adversity. And you know, honestly, it's a way of evening things out. I get to college and, you know, I wake up from surgery. tore my ACL the year before, wake up from surgery, and they're like, you might not play basketball ever again. And I just remember, you know, at that point in time, my dad, he let me have my pity party. And then he was like, you know, you can, you can either have a pity party or you can get this done. So you need to decide, you need to look yourself in the mirror and you need to make a promise. And like at that point, it was like, I think I developed that mentality. Like I decided to have that winning mentality of overcoming adversity and obstacles.

Do you think all champions need adversity in order to become a champion or can they get there without some surgery, breakdown, let down, parent breakup, you know, some type of extreme adversity? Do you think it's possible?

I'd be interested to know if there's anybody that has just had it because, I mean, even if you think about like Michael Jordan, you think about the greats of Phil Jackson, you think about You know, just everybody that's amazing in their field, Serena Williams, Dominique Dawes, Dominique Moceanu, like you think about those amazing athletes, they've faced adversity. I mean, there's always been a time where you have to decide whether you're going to get up or you're gonna quit. And I think it's because they get up, that's the reason why they're equipped to be able to face those challenges. I mean, everybody thinks that like when you win a championship, everything's so easy. But you go back, what if Jordan didn't make that steal against Karl Malone? Like there are certain plays that you have to make. One play completely defines who somebody is or isn't.

Crazy.

And I think those moments of adversity kind of prepare you for that moment so you're not scared of it.

Yeah. How is it, I mean you were in the WNBA number one pick 2008, is that right?

You were dating me, but yeah.

The same year. You went to the Olympics that year, right? Which must have been amazing. I've wanted to go to the Olympics since I was a kid. But you didn't win a WNBA championship for eight more years, is that right?

Yes.

How do you handle that mentally when you're number one, you're a two-time player of the year in college, is that right? Or in high school, two-time player of the year in high school or college? How do you win for so long and then not win for eight years? How do you stay motivated? disciplined, excited, having fun when you're not winning the championship.

I think that's the challenge. You know, it's weird because I can remember every single moment at every loss, like after every like we had this discussion after we won because after we won I was like, man, there's a joy, but I just want to do it again. Yeah. You know what I mean? It's almost like that like it's like the disease you just you You taste the cake, you want to eat the cake again. You don't want just one slice. So that's how it was with winning. And I almost felt like the feeling of winning was less of a feeling than the heartache of defeat. And so honestly, I feel like what kept me going is just like, I gotta get a piece of the cake. You know what I mean? And so every day I would just wake up. I think the hardest thing is, when you do achieve success to me, because there's everybody that's climbing the wall, like wants to win and is coming after you. And so it goes back to like the hunter versus the hunted. You know, what is what's harder and honestly is harder to be hunted every year. And so for me, that's the biggest thing is just to come back and do it again. You know, it's so hard going that long without a championship or you wake up with so much motivation every single day, so much doubt every day from other people. as to whether you can do it or not.

How much doubt do you have with yourself? Do you live with doubt or insecurity or do you feel like you are unstoppable every moment of the day?

It has taken a while for me. I don't know if it's doubt or just learning to be in the moment because everybody has insecurities, everybody has doubt, everybody has fear, a what-if type of thing. But when you're truly in the moment, that stuff doesn't matter. And I would get so, if I scored 30 or if I scored 35 and had an amazing game, I was on to the next play. It was the next game, next whatever. But I found when I scored 10 or five and didn't play well and just what, I hung on to it. And so I learned that I play better when I'm just in the moment and I prepare, do the best I can. And then I live with it. And it wasn't always like that. Yeah. It wasn't always like that.

Did you ever used to beat yourself up for many days and weeks or months in a poor performance?

A thousand percent. Really? And you can see it. My brother, my oldest brother, played basketball for 10 years in the NBA. He's been my hero for life. I talked to him after almost every game. And Anthony would always tell me, you should take the shots you are normal, You should take, regardless of what the previous play is. And he would see my hesitation if I missed a couple. And then obviously, Kobe, I asked him because he would be the king of going five for 26 and then hitting the game winner. And I remember asking him, Right.

Missing over and over and over again.

He missed over and over and over again, but then get the ball in the crunch time, do his move, go to a spot, right shoulder turnaround, Bam, left dribble, bam. And I remember asking him, how do you have the courage to take those shots? And him saying, because I've put in too much time, and so much effort, and so much repetition that the next shot has to go in. Percentage wise, when you miss three or four, you should really be taking that next shot, 'cause it has to go in. And so he's like, when you prepare, that's when it takes all that out of there. So I just kind of listened to that, and it's taking some time.

You're still getting there.

It's very interesting. I had a conversation. I'm a big believer in like asking people what they consume, like people that are, you know, successful or whatever. And I remember talking to Kobe and him saying that he really enjoyed this. Wow. And so I just want to say like, yeah, so that was powerful to me. And that was when my agent reached out. I was like, hell yeah, like this is.

Wow, that's cool.

So that's cool.

Wow.

And even other episodes. So I'm a big like, and I'll ask you after the show, what is your favorite books? What are you reading right now? What are your podcasts that you what you listen to. Everybody gets tired because I send the same text every year. I'm like, so are you listening to anything else? Like, I'm big into that. And I was annoying with Kobe, like, what are you reading right now? What are you reading right now? Like, what are you doing? And he would always be like, I'm doing this. I'm reading this.

And so this was one of, yeah, this is one of the things that he mentioned.

Did he say he was listening or did he say he just enjoyed being on the show? He said he enjoyed being on the show, but he's also listened.

And this is, you know, a good.

Podcast to listen to. That's great.

Awesome. It's good to know.

Yeah. Good to know.

I think you already kind of knew, but... It's good to know coming from Kobe though. It's great. I mean, we had a great connection. I mean, I didn't meet him before then. Three minutes before I connected with him, right when he came out, and his publicist and the whole team was there, and they were like, he's got 20 minutes, and he was like, take as.

Much time as you want. He was really cool about it. He's super cool. He was our first guest on our podcast, Love in the Time of Parker. And, you know, I was, I'm friends with him, but I didn't want to like ask to, you know how it's kind of like that line where you're like, I don't really want to ask because people ask you 50 million times a day. For everything. Yeah. Yeah. So I was like, I don't want to be that person. He actually saw the promo for the New York game that we were doing and was like, Do you have a guest? And I was just like, Hey, come on.

Yeah, like we would love, I've been.

Wanting to ask you. He was like, Yo, don't even go through, I was like, We were trying to go through your publicist. he's like, Skip all that, like, whatever.

That's pretty cool. So you've been pretty close with him for a while?

Yeah, like 2008 was when-- When you.

Came into the league.

He became, yeah, he became kind of like my little mentor. And yeah, like we went through waves of like super connected to, you know, fall off to text every, whatever. But he's always been like in the playoffs is when we're like super-- yeah.

I mean, he was such a big fan of the WNBA. What's been the biggest insecurity you've had to overcome?

I feel as though when you're able to do a number of things, when you can dribble, when you can pass, when you can shoot, people expect you to always constantly make the play that you should make or the best play. And because you can do so much, I find it harder because you don't know if that's a good shot because you can make a nice pass. And so I think the struggle I've had has been making sure that I'm listening to my voice and what I know is right and doing the best I can and not necessarily focusing on the other stuff. Because when you become a leader, when you become, you know, a star on a team and you're, you're dependent on night in and night out, you're going to make more mistakes than people on the team. That's, I mean, that's the reality of it. Yeah. But you have to be confident in your decisions.

How do you handle your emotions when you know you've made a mistake and you're being criticized for that mistake, whether it be by a few people or by the online world or whatever it may be.

It's really funny because this last two or three years, my mantra has been calm is a superpower. I always struggled because I feel as though in women's sports, in women in general, in business, wherever politics, If you lose your composure, you're considered crazy, irrational, out of control, whereas with a man, you're considered passionate, competitive, and all these things. And so I just determined it's better to be calm anyway. You look back on things and usually it's when you go crazy. You're like, no, I shouldn't have done that. I shouldn't have thrown that. You're apologizing for action. Usually not in action. And so that's kind of been my place of trying to reach that calm and be calculated and the people I respect the most, they think before they say. That's kind of what I've tried to develop. I'm not perfect at all. I'm probably nowhere near where I need to be, but that's kind of been my mantra.

Do you think you think the greatest athletes are more calm than they are reactive and passionate, let's say. Or, you know, Muhammad Ali was very passionate, very outspoken, you know, Conor McGregor, like these people are very outspoken and passionate. Do you think you can be greater by being more calm?

I think our society likes to put and label individuals. Like you meet people that are loud and, you know, say all these words, but what's the action that backs it up? And to me, It's the action. It's not necessarily what you do all before that. Right. Dame Lillard to me is one of.

The most... That guy's a machine.

He's a machine, but he's great. He's one of those leaders that just, you can't tell on his face. And unfortunately for me, I was born with this problem that everything I think comes across my face.

I face the same way.

To the point where now my daughter, 11 years old, will be like, Mom, what's wrong? Like when something comes on the television or something like that, like you think this. and I'm like, no, I don't think that, but I do, but I don't. So it's trying to get under control, having composure. And I've learned throughout that when the team or whatever organization you're a part of, as a leader, if they're hyped and their level is 10, it's your job to kind of bring the team down to an even keel level. And when everybody is down, it is your job to bring them up. Bring them up. Yes.

A little bit, yeah.

It is your job. And so I feel as though as I'm getting older and as I'm maturing, I try to do that in whatever situation, whether it's the team, whether it's my family, I'm trying. Yeah. It's not always-- I know, right? It's not always, you know, it doesn't always work out, but at the same time, I think that's what I'm attempting to do.

Are you a student of sports psychology, any chance? Or have you worked with sports psychologists?

I'm a minor. My minor in college. Yeah.

Do you work with any mindset coaches today or have you recently?

So I am huge into reading and then reaching out to those that write. Those authors. Joshua Medcalf wrote a book, Chop Wood Carry Water, which I read right before in 2016. Before, We won our championship. And what struck me about that book, and you know, not spoiler, but in the book it was talking about golf balls and how initially golf balls were smooth and when people would hit them, you couldn't control the direction that they were going. But they noticed that the more dented the golf balls were, as you hit them, they actually traveled better. So he used that as a metaphor of like humans and people in life and individuals and like Getting beat up and getting bruised, you actually will travel farther and better.

Interesting.

And that just hit me in a way. You know, the whole book is just do the best you can and then, you know, live in the moment. And that's kind of, that kind of reached me. And so I'm huge into psychology. I read a million books. Like, I'm really into it. I love panels, I love podcasts. So that's kind of where I go for my sports psychology.

Yeah, I read a book, I think it was called Champion's Mindset, or maybe it's called Train to Win. I forget, I'll have to check it out again. But the sports psychologist said that you should always practice like it's a game and bring your energy to the game level. And then at game time, actually like calm down and just be more relaxed and calm and be in the flow. So I always thought that was interesting. It's like raise it up in practice, bring it down before the game. 'Cause usually before I learned that, I would get so hyped before a game. In the game. And I'm like, man, I'm tired. You know, it's like you got no energy 'cause you've just exhausted it in warm-ups and you're not relaxed. So true. Have you ever done that where you're.

Just like, ah, we're going to the championship and then, whew, I can't even lift my knees today. Yeah, that we call that the like first two minutes, you know, when you get out of breath in the first two minutes of the game. You haven't done anything. You know, the playoffs is, I remember we were in the WNBA finals. and I walked out there and it was a game five against Minnesota 2016. This is my first elimination, winner take all game. And I remember looking around and my heart was beaten, taking deep breaths the first two minutes, and then you get lost in your craft.

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So it's like literally it's just getting past those first two minutes of anxiousness and that's when you have the turnovers and the problems or whatever. And then you just settle in and you try to, you know, do what you've always done. Yeah.

Who is the most influential person in your life growing up?

Well, growing up, I idolized my brothers. My two older brothers, Anthony and Marcus, they're eight and 11 years older than me. So I was the baby, baby sister. And Anthony actually went on, played in the NBA, played for Toronto, played for the Cleveland Cavaliers for a while. And then my middle brother is actually a radiologist. He wanted to be a doctor since he was five. And he went to medical school, went to Johns Hopkins, so we're really proud of him. So I had two amazing role models just in not what their craft was, but just as people. Even to this day, anything I go through, any problem, obstacle, any choice I'm trying to make, I always reach out and talk to them. I mean, that's, you know, they really are my foundation.

What was the greatest lesson each one of them taught you?

My goodness, that's such a great question. Anthony is Mr. Devil's Advocate. So whether he is for it or whether he is against it, he is going to ask you the other side. That is my brother. So now when I'm thinking and, you know, I think I watched like an old Full House episode where it talked about your conscience and how eventually it becomes your own voice as opposed to your parents telling you not supposed to do stuff.

Yes.

That's my conscience now. Like I hear Anthony and now it's my voice where I'm like, okay, so what if this, you know, what is the other side? And so Anthony kind of, I joke with him that like he would be the one that would, you know, play devil's advocate to like winning the lottery or something like that, you know, he's that type. But I would say that that's the lesson from Anthony and then from Marcus, he is one of those guys that is just so certain on what he wants and he will do in work for anything. And he said he wanted to be a doctor at five years old. And he worked and stayed motivated and long hours, you know, pushed through adversity, everything to become a doctor. And so I think just watching them operate the way their fathers, their husbands, it really is inspirational for me.

Yeah, that's cool. I love that you are a TikTok star through your daughter. And I love the relationship you guys have together where you're having jokes and playing around a lot on your social media. I think everyone should follow you guys there. What was that like being a mom in a career that I guess most women don't have kids at that age when they're trying to become great as an athlete in the WNBA that early? What was that like for you? Being a young mom while being the face of the WNBA, how did you manage that? And how do you manage it still?

I remember it was coming off of 2008. We won the national championship, won Olympic gold medal, we lost in the WNBA semifinals, Western Conference finals, and a last second shot. Anyway, I can still see it. And I remember I had just won Rookie of the year in MVP and I was in San Antonio and I remember I started feeling a little sick. I was like, okay. And my best friend was the first to find out. Like I told her that I was expecting. We were all excited. I was supposed to go to Russia that year to play overseas. But obviously we wanted to wait to tell everybody or whatever. The first reactions I got were so Disappointing to me. Like it was almost more of like how could you do this to us as fans? Not within the organization, but just the reaction that I got from others of like oh she's done. Like she's washed up. She's not gonna be able to come back.

--This is after your first year in the league.

--This is after my first year. I you know I became a young mom and I let me give you some history. I've always wanted to be a mother. That has been what I feel as though I was born to be. I was playing dolls till I was like dang near 14. I just loved the idea of having a little you running around. And so, I always wanted to be a young mom. So, although I was surprised, I was extremely excited to have a daughter. But that wasn't the way it was accepted. And at the time, I set my mind where I was like, I'm gonna come back and play on this date. So, she was born May 13th. I played on July 5th in a game.

Two months later?

Played two months later. Two months later. I was about two weeks after I had her. I locked out my whole pregnancy. Oh my God.

Young and dumb.

You don't know. You're young and dumb.

I got this, I'll be back in two weeks.

Young and dumb, yeah, back locked up everything. It was crazy, but- oh my gosh, two months later playing. Yes, and she honestly has been my entire inspiration, motivation, every single thing. Every day I wake up, I want her to know that I'm working for her. I want her to know that, you know, I love her and I want to set a great example. Wow. And honestly, The biggest thing that I would like to message I would like to get across is within parenting, within sports, we've got to change and shift the perception of athletes in parenting and being there. Because, you know, a number of times I would go places and Layla wouldn't be with me and they would be like, oh, well, who's watching Layla? Like, who's taking care of Layla? Like, who's whatever, but they're not asking LeBron or Steph or anybody or Dame Lillard or whatever. I think it's so important for fathers to be there as well and to be present. And we're seeing now paternity leave and we're seeing guys like Jimmy Butler miss his Miami Heat debut to be there for the birth of his daughter. We're seeing how hands-on Steph Curry is. And so I think for me, it's, you know, the amount of support that I've had from LA Sparks, the amount of support I've had from my family, I'm lucky because as a working mom, My organization allows me to bring my daughter along.

That's cool.

I was a nursing at halftime of games.

No way!

Yeah, it was just kind of crazy. That's the way it is. And so we just, we've grown up. Me and Layla have grown up together.

So you were nursing in halftime in the locker room. Are there other moms that do this too? You know, I mean, a halftime?

I don't know, but I was just so stubborn in that I never wanted to sacrifice my career for my family, and I didn't want to sacrifice my family for my career. So the best thing is just do both. And honestly, I was adamant that I was going to nurse my daughter. We were gonna go in crazy amount of countries and we're traveling all the time. Like, I want to nurse her. So she nursed for 13 months. We didn't spend a night away from.

Each other for two years.

Like, she went everywhere with me. That's crazy. And that's, you know, that's, that's what worked for me. Other mothers can figure out what works for them, and that's fine. but, and fathers as well. But for me, that's what I needed.

Do you think other moms in the WNBA would have the same opportunities to do that? Or do you think because you were the number one pick, the star, the face, they were like, okay, if she wants to do this, you can have your kid in halftime while we're doing that. We're trying to focus on the game.

That's what I struggle with because everybody commends my effort of being a working mom and I have to kind of take a time out because I'm like, you know, there are women that can't bring their kids to their job, right. That can't travel with them, that need to find child care. And, and I didn't have those issues and those obstacles. And you're right. I don't know if I was a second round pick and trying to make it in the league, if I would even still be playing basketball with it, with a child. And fortunately, we did. re-sign a CBA because at the time in 2008, my daughter was traveling with me. I paid for my mom to fly. I paid for my half of the hotel because we were sharing rooms. All the extra costs that go into having a child, there was no child stipend. You're moving to a city for six months, who's gonna watch 'em, type of thing. And now with this new CBA, there's maternity leave. you get full pay if you are expecting. So there are things that we're moving in the right direction.

Wow, that's cool. What's been the biggest challenge you've had to overcome in the last 12 years since entering the league? Biggest, most challenging phase of life?

I would say when I went through just the injury after injury after injury in the WNBA, after having Leila. But I also would say it's tough going overseas for the other six months of the year. And there's so many times as I'm yanking my child out of school to take her overseas that I'm questioning whether I'm doing the right thing for her. And honestly, looking back, it couldn't have been better. Really? I think at the time that's the hardest thing that I've had to do is, you know, take her out of school and go overseas and put her in these schools overseas and she's looking at me like, I don't know what the heck they're saying. Yeah. And it's really, served us well because she really is such a resilient, adaptable kid. Like, you can put her in whatever room and she's, you know, she's gonna shine.

Wow. Where do you think she would be if she stayed in LA for the last 12 years or 11 years as opposed to exploring the world and being a global citizen?

It's interesting because, you know, I definitely think your environment shapes your upbringing, but I think the most proud moment I've ever had was, you know, and you're in LA, so there's elaborate birthday parties. We've gone to people's house where I'm like, my jaw is hitting the ground.

Like looking at this.

And, you know, Layla is riding the camel at the birthday party. And I'm like, well, we're not gonna have a birthday party like this. But, you know, whatever. But we go overseas to Russia and she has a classmate in her class. And the family invited us over to dinner. And so my translator came with us and we were going to their house. And so we open the door and we open the door and it's a one room place with a stove in the middle with no floor. And I'm trying to get to Layla. No floor? There's no floor. It's dirt and wood. So it's just literally, you know. So we get there and I'm trying to get to Layla 'cause I kind of like, she walks in first and so I'm trying to get to her so that she doesn't say anything or whatever. And she looks around and she's like, a dollhouse. And they just run over and start playing with the dollhouse. And so that to me was just like, we're doing something right, you know, with her. And that to me was so special. So I feel as though, you know, having those experiences of knowing a lot of different people from a lot of different areas that look different has really helped in, like, who. Who Layla is. Yeah.

What is being a mom taught you about yourself the most?

Everything. Every single thing. Every Thing you're great at is amplified everything you're terrible at is amplified. Yeah, I Didn't know as much as I thought I did well, you were what 23? I was 23 when I had my daughter, but she really has taught me probably the same amount as I've taught like it's just it's crazy how much she teaches me.

What's the three biggest lessons she's taught you?

She has definitely taught me a that our actions speak way louder than words. I always used to tell her all the time, we don't cry when we lose. Like, we do the best we can. We do this, do this. And so I walked in, and one of her cousins beat her at a board game, and she's crying in the corner. And I go over there, and I'm like, Layla, you know, I'm giving her a lesson. Like, you don't cry. And, like, this isn't a time for crying. Like, you pick the pieces up, and you go back over there and play. And she's like, but you did. You cried. And I was just like, But that's different, but it's really not. And so it's just she really teaches me that she's watching every single thing that I'm doing.

Every move you make.

Every move I make. She checks me on, big thing now is pronouns with her school, and they're learning about that in her community connections class. And so they address when they get on, they say she/her or her/him, whatever they, however you want to be addressed. And so there was an Uber driver that was coming and I said he, you know, he, I didn't know if it was a he, but I said he. And she's like, well, how do you know it's a he? You're assuming you shouldn't assume, you know? So it's, it's really interesting to see how this generation is being brought up. And it really makes me happy that they are very concerned about the next person, others, the environment, things like that. And so She's, yeah, she's taught me so many lessons.

Where do you think you'd be if you didn't have her at that age and you had five, seven, eight years in the WNBA and on your career only in that? Do you think you would have accomplished more, won more championships, or do you think being a mom actually helped you become a better athlete?

I think being a mom helped me become a better person. And I say this all the time, like without the injuries, without Having my daughter, I might have had more championships.

Without injuries in your daughter?

Without, yeah, honestly. But where I am now in terms of realizing, like, I am so happy. I'm trying to get better every single day, trying to acknowledge my faults and look myself in the mirror and see where I need to improve and get better. And a lot of that is because of her, because of my daughter, because I want to I want to be somebody that she is proud of when she is older, that she wants to come home, that she is proud of who her mom is and not what, you know, what I've accomplished.

Yeah, that's cool. I want to throw in the stuff you were talking about with Kobe because you've known Kobe for a lot longer than me. I knew him once in an interview and we stayed in touch over messaging each other, which was nice of him. But he was very impactful in my life, watching him as an athlete and also as a human. how he dealt with adversity from earlier in his career to how he transitioned almost seamlessly from athlete to entrepreneur, leader, creator, storyteller. What was the biggest lesson that he taught you? And what was the most impactful moment you remember spending with him?

Well, Kobe is, Kobe is one of the best dads. And I truly believe that the love that he has for his family. And I think the biggest thing for me is just being able to kind of, like right now, even when I'm in the gym with my daughter and we're working on something, like he took the time and the energy And as kids, he was just dad to them. You know, it didn't matter if you won or scored 81 the night before, like you're picking up. I think the best story that he told, he was on our podcast, the Ledlow and Parker podcast that I do during the NBA season, and he said that he was late to pick up his daughter one time, and he wasn't on time, and they ripped him. And so every time after that, wife, daughters, everybody ripped him.

Wow.

He was on time, one of the first people to be there and pick up line to pick him up after that, because that was what he had to do. And so to me, I think you tell me who somebody is, but you tell what their family is going to say about them and how much time they spend and energy they spend. So for me, that was a huge role model. Just in the way that he spoke about them and how much pride and joy he, I remember running into him in China and it was the first time I met his daughters and the Olympics. He was like you see in the Olympics in 08 and he's like you see them? You see them? They're gonna break all your records one day. That's the first thing I'm like, well nice to meet you.

That was the first time you met him?

The first time I met his daughters.

Okay, not him.

Not him. But the first time I met his daughters, that's the first thing he he said to me. And I just remember laughing over the years about that. And, you know, it's just one of those things where you could see how much love and energy and effort that he put into his family and how much joy that brought him. And to be honest with you, I think the biggest thing is, is just overcoming adversity. People are, you know, they think it's easy to get to five championships, or they, it's easy to just come out and score or whatever, but to like working out with him and seeing the amount of detail and energy that he put into, I remember doing a jab step. You know, we've done jabs since we were like five. Jab step, jab step. He was like, no, I'm not biting. Your left leg doesn't move the same when you're going that direction. So why would I bite that you're actually gonna go that direction? Like that attention to detail that he has, like it's an obsession. And I'm a firm believer in kids can get it. If you talk to them and teach them and spend time with them, and tell them and teach them how to work to get something, they can get it. So we don't need to dumb down stuff, we don't need to baby them, and he didn't do that. The basketball team he coached, they were running sets that we ran in college.

Really?

Yeah, so it's just, I really loved that about him.

Was there one moment that stands out that was really memorable and impactful for you?

I think the amount of confidence that he has, and he's always had, is the thing that sticks out to me the most.

On global.

Yeah. Yeah, the amount of ways that he can just say things in just a Kobe only mentality. There was a time in 2012 at the Olympics where we would always go play cards. And so it was like a-- London. Yes, in London. And it was, you know, the players lounge where everybody would show up and we'd play play cards and whatever. Literally, you could not leave if he lost. He had to keep playing until he won.

First of all, I'm looking over somebody's.

Shoulder 'cause the pot was ridiculous. I'm not playing with D-Wade and Kobe and all that. But yeah, you can't leave and he's sitting there like, no, oh, so you're scared, you're not gonna play again? Like, dude, I've just beat you four straight times. Oh, am I scared? Oh, you don't wanna play again? So that's just his mentality. Like he's always been like that. He's cocky, but he puts in the time. Yeah.

Who was the athlete on the men's side that you respected the most growing up?

I am a Chicagoan. So obviously I grew up watching the Bulls. I was a huge Bulls fan to the point where it was like, wait, we didn't win the championship this year? We would crash, you know? 'Cause it was like the expectation was like Grant Park Every single year, that's where the championship celebration was. Like everybody knew. So I would say as a whole, just the Bulls franchise.

Were there any players when you were in high school and college that you watched and respected a lot?

I was the biggest Allen Iverson fan.

Really? Gosh, he's amazing.

Allen Iverson fan. My brother got drafted and he played with Philly his first two years, and Allen Iverson When I saw him in person, my mouth like dropped. I was the biggest Allen Iverson fan to the point where it was like, I was trying to get the braids, I had the finger band. My brother got a finger band from him, so I was wearing that. I was wearing the, you know, the AI, the Reebok shoes.

I was doing all that. Like I was trying to be like AI.

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It's a really good question. Honestly, Reggie Miller?

Really?

I really do.

Why?

Because I feel as though people don't understand that they were like, it was this so close. And the way that we say and talk and the way people Talk about championships, it comes down to like an inch.

Inch.

A centimeter. And that's how that dude is bad. Like he is unbelievable. And just realizing after working with him at TNT and NBA TV and things like that, realizing that it's not just like you can't turn it on and off. Like you're not just a basketball player that is, you know, attention to detail, whatever. Like he's like that with broadcasting. He's always on, he's always early, like super early to everything. He always knows exactly what the rundown of the show is. Like some analysts, it's like, just ask me the question, whatever. He knows everything. His attention to detail, he just puts in the time. He gets up every morning and works out at the butt crack of dawn. Like he just, being around him more, it's just so much respect for him.

Wow. And what about the female athlete not in basketball that you admire and respect the most?

Female athlete not in basketball, I mean Serena Williams is, She's a beast. She's a beast. I mean, I grew up, my mom was trying to get me to play tennis, like late in life, and I was just like, I wanna play basketball.

But Serena had that in her.

You got that wingspan over the tennis court. I was trying to get my daughter and that, you know, that didn't work out too well. Maybe my nieces or something. But yeah, Serena Williams, I think for me, it's, you know, we connect on her being a mom as well. I think it's so important in stepping into places and rooms that aren't used to having people that look and are like you.

Right.

And she's done that and basically broken down every single barrier for those that follow. And to be able to see like the fruit of your labor while you're actually still playing. Like to me, for her to be playing against some of these kids that the reason why they're playing tennis is to her.

It's crazy.

To be able to see the fruit of your labor while you're still playing and you're still killing on the court. I mean, I idolize her for sure.

Wow. 'Cause she had a child and then started playing within months, I think, afterwards too, right?

Yeah.

Two, three, four months maybe?

That's crazy.

Super fast. And still winning and unbelievable. Do you have a mantra that you live by on a daily basis or when you're in practice or when you're at a game when things aren't going well or when you're tired? when you wanna stop, when you'd rather go relax. Do you say something to yourself?

Well, I have two things. One, so I played for the late, great Pat Summit at Tennessee.

I saw her speak once when I was 16, and I was so impressed with her leadership. What was that like?

Coach Summit is one of those people that people try to emulate and be like her. There's nobody that can ever touch what she, who she, anything. It's just Pat is Pat. She transcended women's sports. She transcended the ability of a lot of her student athletes to even have confidence in going forward and being who they are and walking into rooms. And when you talk about women equality, gender equality, She spearheaded all of that. So I would say my mantra when things get tough, because I think I learned so much more about her when things got tough than when she's winning championships. To me, it's like, let's look when things aren't going right. Let's look when stuff isn't going well, when you're not hanging banners, when you're not cutting down nets. How are you as an individual? What are you really doing day to day? And she almost did it more so when things were tough. And I asked her, I remember, you know, when she first got sick, I asked her, like, how do you get through day to day when things get tough? And she's like, left foot, right foot, breathe, repeat. And honestly, that is, I promise you, what I say sometimes, even when I'm like wanting to explode, I'm like, left foot, right foot, breathe, repeat. Like, that's my, that's my mantra. and then secondly, I heard, I cannot remember, it was in gym class when I was in, like, eighth or ninth grade. They had somebody come in and speak to us, and they said that the power of humans is our ability to have compassion and think of others needs and think of what others would want to do. And sometimes we end up putting others in, you know, before ourselves. And so on those days where you don't want to do something on those days where you're struggling, Who are you doing it for? And so for me, when I don't wanna work out, when I don't wanna hop on the Peloton and do my 45 minute workout, I like Layla, I'm.

Doing it for her.

You think of someone. Yeah. I'm like, I'm doing it for you. And sometimes I'll tell her, Layla, I worked out for you today. Like, Layla, I got on that plane to go to Atlanta today for you. That's who I got on the plane for. And so it kind of helps, you know, when you wanna do that extra, you don't wanna do that extra set.

Or you don't wanna do that extra line drill, or whatever.

I just say who I'm doing it for.

Isn't that true when I'm running long distance, I don't want to run long distance. I just committed to doing the marathon in March in LA. Oh my God. Because I've been putting it off for my whole life. You're a saint. Because I'm a sprinter. You know, I'm a basketball football player. I don't run one, two, three miles and that's a lot. And I've been starting to, every mile, think of someone when it gets hard.

Yeah.

And put my attention towards that person. And my focus is, I don't want to let this person down. And me stopping the smile is letting this person down in my life. And so I use that as a technique and a tool to just put my attention elsewhere as opposed to my own pain or tiredness.

Yeah.

And it really helps.

That's amazing.

And when I run the marathon, I'm gonna have a wristband and I'll put a name, 26 names.

That would be.

And just look down every mile and put my attention towards those, Individuals.

That, first of all, I want to commend you because I started doing distance training last off season. Oh man.

And when I tell you it's just.

Like not what I do. Like I see regular people that aren't athletes out running miles on the beach and I'm just like how? I know. I don't get it. So first of all, I want to commend you for doing a marathon because that's commitment. Well, I haven't done it yet, but I'm committed to doing it. But I mean at least committing to preparing for a marathon. But secondly, like you're right because then you turn that attention and that energy. Like I think so much as energy. Like if you think about it, when you walk in, I was, I can't remember who I was listening to, what podcast it was, but they were talking about how like, you know, you can turn on a television and you can tell teams that play with energy. It's just something that you can't touch, you can't feel, it's not, it's, you know, it's the intangibles. And I feel like that with working out, with the way you do things, like energy is everything. And if you can create and find that energy, like you're able to do so much.

How do you find it when you don't have it?

I think it's thinking of, yeah, it's thinking of your why, thinking of your reason. I also feel as though, like, when you do something, the look back feeling, like the feeling of regret, like there's so many times where I wake up and I don't wanna work out, and then after I'm done, I'm like, oh, there's never a time where I'm like, I wish I wouldn't have done that. It doesn't really- Unless maybe you injured yourself or something. Exactly. But usually you're like, I feel so much better. I did it. I accomplished this. I'm so goal-oriented. So I have the microscopic goals day to day, and I have the telescopic goals. And those are so important to me because you kind of lose sight when you're looking out into the future. You lose sight of how you're going to accomplish it. So those microscopic goals, those daily goals of like, okay, I'm going to do this. At least I've done this task. I accomplished something today.

Where do you think it'd be without goals?

Oh my goodness, I am so goal-oriented. Like to the point where when I tore my ACL, you know, the degrees that they try to get your knee to bend, and I remember them telling me, 'cause the first thing, don't tell me I can't do something. I'm the one that's like, my dad was like trying to get rid of me on a Saturday and was like, Run around the house 80 times. My brother's like, yeah, I bet you can't do it. I'll give you five bucks. And on the 100th lap, I was like, you said 80, like I did it a hundred times. So don't tell me I can't do something. And so that's kind of my goals. I set them with that in mind of trying to push myself and trying to see what I can achieve, make it a competition even within my head.

Do you think anyone can achieve great accomplishments without setting clearly defined big goals and incremental goals along the way? Do you think it just happens? I have this idea it's just gonna happen.

I mean, you can call it discipline, you can call it organization, you can call it goal-oriented, but I think you have to have some sort of plan. I don't know. And maybe there are people that just fall upon stuff, but to me, I think it has to be clear, calculated. You have to have a purpose. otherwise for me, I lose motivation. If I don't know what I'm trying to accomplish, what it's going to get, that type of thing, then, like, if you get on a treadmill and you're just running and you don't know how long you're running for, you don't know the distance you're running, you don't know the speed, I don't know how many people, maybe there's some, like, Marines out there that would just get on there.

And run until it's time.

But I was, like, the one at practice, like, okay, so it would just. Tell me at least the first five minutes so I can get through that and then we can make it work.

Yeah, it's funny. Unless you're like Forrest Gump, maybe. Just fell out of a plane and he's running. I love that movie. Where do you think you'd be without coaches in your life? Do you think you'd be able to be as great as an athlete, champion, all-American, player of the year, without a coach's? Could you do it on your own, you think?

No, absolutely not. And I think the biggest, maybe on the court, you know, for some people, but for me personally, it's like sports is like a metaphor for life. There's so many things within life that I wouldn't have been able to get over or accomplish or persevere through without having those failures in sport. And I always love the coach that kind of like tests people. to see how they react. Yeah, no, I definitely wouldn't be able to accomplish any of this stuff just because I think the mental toughness, when you're young, you don't understand why, but you know, soon you, you realize later in life, you're like, huh. That's what allowed me to have the mental toughness. Right. Because, you know, when you're younger, everybody kind of micromanages your time. You're in study hall to make sure that you do it. You're, they're check in every grade. Then you get to the pros and they're like, yeah, so the bus is at this time. We play at this time. You got to eat by yourself.

Yeah.

You got to figure out your workout plan. You have to do all these things. And so it's like coaches before taught me how to have discipline. And sometimes people don't do what they need to do. They need other people to tell them. And, you know, once you get to a point where you're kind of like your own disciplinarian, I think it It's really special. Yeah, I've been- you- know what you need, you know?

Of course, yeah. I've always been very disciplined, I wouldn't say always, but I say when I got to high school and on, I got very disciplined because I got clear on my goals. But having a coach could always push me a little harder than I would push myself. Just a little bit even. I could push myself hard, you know, I can work out with the best of them alone in the gym, but it's like you've got someone over your shoulder helping you, correcting you, just watching you. you're gonna push a little harder. When I transitioned from playing arena football, I never made it to the NFL, but I was making 250 bucks a week and I felt like the richest man in the world because I was getting to catch a football and I got paid. Playing arena ball, it was very hard to transition out of not having a team, a coach, an organization. And I quickly, within about a year, was like, I need to make my life a sport. I need to find coaches and fitness and relationships and business and have some type of guides helping me. And I've always had coaches since then and it's always made me better. So I'm a big believer in coaches in sport, in life, as a mom, as a whatever. For me personally, it's key.

I think it's key and you hit it right on the head. And Coach Summit used to always say this, when you're chasing something, you should chase people and passion. And if you chase those two things, you'll never fail. And in a way, especially in these last two years when I've kind of started thinking about what I want to do after basketball, after the ball stops bouncing, I realize it's like your relationships that you're building with people. And you know, my goal, I want to win another championship for sure within basketball. My goal after basketball, like I look at guys like Magic Johnson, and I look at how he's kind of a business, like he's a businessman. He transitioned into that. And honestly, I mean, maybe I'm wrong, but he was kind of one of the first from the NBA that really became a businessman. And I remember a couple years ago, I was, I had a meeting with him and I was like, I want to be you. I want to have that transition where we can open up doors for other women in sport. Because honestly, like, if you think about it, just training wise, Team sports are run like a boardroom. That's how it is. And so you're learning and you're competitive and you learn how to fail, you learn how to get up, you know, we're coachable. And that's the first thing I say, anytime I have a business meeting or anything, listen, I'm coachable. So you tell me what you want, what you don't like, we talk about it. And so that's kind of, you're right, it is about surrounding yourself with great people. You know, obviously you're gonna be passionate in what you do, but it's the people that really make it.

What did Pat mean by chasing people?

She always surrounded herself with people that had a number of goals that kind of were in the same chapter as her. She said she doesn't want people on the same page, she just needs people in the same chapter. Because you can eventually get to the same page. That's what she said. I can remember a number of times is she was always a mentor. She was always for her assistant coaches leaving and getting head coaching jobs.

That's cool.

And then basically imagine the impact that she had at Tennessee, and then those coaches are taking what she had and what she said and what she taught them. So are their programs. And so it's almost like that trickle down effect of The amount of kids that she truly has impacted is still going on. 'Cause there's still head coaches that coached under her. And so that to me is what chasing people means. It means, you know, establishing a community. It means being a mentor. Like there's so many people in my life that have done things for me with nothing in return.

Right.

Like there's so many times where you really are like, why did they help me? You know? But then you go and do something for somebody that it doesn't benefit you at all. And so I think that's kind of like, that's what being a good human is, you know? It's just like there's paying it forward, you know? And you go out to dinner and somebody pays for your dinner and then the next time you pay for somebody else's dinner and like, kind of trickles down.

And so that's kind of, yeah, that's.

What I learned from Pat. What's missing in your life? Ooh, really? Everything, every question you ask is a good question. What is missing in my life? I am truly fulfilled. Truly, truly fulfilled. I'm grateful. I have so much gratitude. I mean, right now, competition, I'm like dying because I'm so competitive, and so I'm getting on my daughter's nerve because like we go out to casually like bump a volleyball and I'm like, okay, let's see if we can get to 20. It's just the competition aspect. So I would say right now it's the competition because we're not in season. I would say another championship. I believe you can fall up on something once and it can be an accident, it could be lucky. If you do it twice, it's not. So for me, I'm chasing that.

You won in 2016, right?

Yep.

But you got two Olympic gold medals?

Yes.

That's gotta feel good. What's more powerful, the Olympic gold medal.

Or the WNBA championship? To me, it's the WNBA championship. Bring it down. The Olympics, it's like, not to be like this, but Americans can field three teams and probably come home with the gold, silver, and Bronze. Honestly, I really feel like American basketball, women's basketball, and this is no offense to any of the international players, but I just believe that we are head and shoulders above the world. And by saying that, yes, it was competition with Australia. They're amazing. Yes, it was competitions with Russia and Spain and so on. But at the same time, women's, you know, winning a WNBA championship against the best players in the entire world.

Wow. To me, that's, that's like the Olympics, the way it should be. It's like the best of the best coming together.

What?

God, I still gotta feel good when that Olympic gold...

It was amazing. I'm telling you, when I was standing on the podium, 'cause this girl watched the Olympics in '96. When it was in Atlanta, and that was kind of when it transcended the way I thought of women's sports. Women were unbelievable in the '96 Olympics. Was that Jackie Joyner? Was that? It was, yes, Lisa Leslie. talk about, I mean, you talk about Mia Hamm, you talk about Dominique Dawes, Dominique Moceanu, I can name the whole Magnificent Seven. Everybody top to bottom was unbelievable in '96. And then in 2008, stand on that stage, you talk about 12 years later.

Wow.

To me, I remember being that kid on the couch with my dad telling him, I'm gonna be on that floor.

Oh man, that's chills.

And so to hear the national anthem and to experience the opening ceremony and to see how other athletes react to American athletes. That experience is one of the best of the best.

Would you do it again?

Nope. My time with the Olympics is done.

Really?

Yeah, in 2016, after coming off of playing pretty well, I didn't think that there was a question of whether I was going to make the team in 2020.

When you won a championship?

We won the championship and you know, I got cut from the Olympic team. How?

And honestly, you just won the WNBA championship. How did you get cut?

I mean, I guess that's a question for USA Basketball. Wait a minute.

You're the best player in the league. How did they cut you?

I don't know. You gotta ask Gino. But honestly, it was kind of one of those situations where, huh. I'm big into Communication. So if there was no possible way for me to make the team regardless of how I played, because it wasn't based on playing, then tell me and I don't waste my time away from my daughter. I don't waste my time away from my daughter. Training camp and all that. So, that to me was adversity. But honestly looking back, if that was the situation I was going to walk into, playing would have not been a fun time for me.

No, it's true.

You know, I got to spend more time with my kid at home. And two is I got to experience something twice. You know, this past Olympic Games with Don Staley, they reached out and asked if I wanted to participate. And to me, I was like, you know, if it was something that I looked in my mirror and I said I didn't deserve to be on the team, I might come back out for the team just because I feel as though You know, I did something. But how in the world am I going to tell my daughter if somebody or something treats you wrong or in an unfair manner to go back? And so that kind of was my ending point of like my time with the Olympics and with the US basketball is over.

Is that person still there?

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Fidelity Brokerage Services member NYSC SIPC. Gino is not the coach anymore, but the committee picks the system. Yeah. It's, you know, whatever.

I get it.

At the same time, it was just kind of one of those situations where it's like, no, I'm good. I'm cool. Like, interesting.

I'll spend time at home. Yeah. What if all the what if they all said we really want you back 2021?

I'm good.

You're good. Nothing would change your mind.

I'm good. I'm going to be chilling. I'm working on getting my daughter a passport because she's not playing for USA Basketball. I was playing. No, I'm kidding. No, but yeah, so I'm my time is finished. I appreciate the time and the energy I put into it. But yeah, it's done.

Wow. How many more years do you wanna play? If you could decide, I'm gonna play until this year, this season, what would that be?

Here's the thing, I was sitting with Isaiah Thomas in studio, 'cause he retired, I think, early.

He retired at like 32, 33, Isaiah Thomas.

And we grew up. Did he wanna retire or was it injury or? I think it was a combination of both. He said he showed up at the gym and he didn't wanna play. And he was like, I can't cheat the game. And it was one of those situations where it's like, when you go out on the court, and it's fun and you're used to dominating and working people and being able to get to the basket when you want. And then you're looking at people that you would normally cook and you would normally beat in a game and they're going past you and you can't score on them. He's like, it just wasn't fun anymore. And for me, I don't ever want to cheat. It's not even cheating the game because there's some people that can play But I'm not really competing against the game. I want to compete against myself. And if I'm not where I want to be or who I am, my brother said it best, Anthony said it best, he's like, you know, you have that year, and then you have that possible. And if that possible tells you that that year was true, then you're done. And so honestly, in 2019, that was my year where like this past year was like that, like, let me roll the dice, and if it's the same as last year, I might be done.

Really? And so, this might be your last year.

I'm not saying that, you know, this year or the next year or even three years, but I'm saying when I am not able to do the things that I'm used to doing, I have to walk away from the game.

Wow.

I cannot cheat myself in the game like that. Yeah.

Wow. But if you could choose, hypothetically, how many more years would you like to play if you still loved it? If you're still healthy and loved it.

Honestly, it's not even the love. I love basketball. I love competing. I love being in the arena. I love all of that. It's when you don't want to prepare. When you don't want to get up in the off-season.

You don't want to do the sand runs.

You don't want to do the sand dunes. You don't want to go like that's the problem because then you need all that stuff. So that everybody wants to play in the playoff games and all that stuff. It's when I stop wanting to prepare is when I'm gonna know.

No, you'll know.

It's there, and honestly, who knows? It could be next year, it could be the year after, it could be three or four more years, but at the same time, I know I have my circle, and I've told them, look at me. If I waver and I don't stay true to myself, you guys have to hold me accountable, and they all agree.

That's good, that's good. It's been an amazing year in terms of people standing up for their rights and people standing up for what they believe in and Black Lives Matter. And you've been a part of this as well. We've had a lot of great conversations on this show. What are you most proud of in terms of the black community stepping up this year or people or organizations? What are you most proud of with the WMBE in terms of what has happened, even though there's been a lot of things that are not to be proud of?

Our country right now, We have a time problem. And by this, I'm going to explain what I mean that we think things were like terrible or bad years and years and generations ago, and it wasn't the case. And in the same instance, we think we haven't gotten better. And, you know, we think it's so long that we haven't gotten better. And I say that in the sense of, you know, when my parents were born in the 50s and, you know, in the 60s, looking back, you think about all the things that they've lived through. And then just even within the last four years, you think about 2017, Colin Kaepernick. You think about kneeling. If you kneeled, you were on the wrong side at that point in time.

Wow.

And then you fast forward now, and this past year, if you didn't kneel, people were asking questions why you didn't. so if something like that can change in a four or five year span, I really am proud of the fact that we haven't even recognized that a generation ago it was two or three athletes that were standing up for activism and social injustice and gender equality and things like that. And now we have entire leagues.

Wow.

Within a generation, we have an entire league Like being a part of that this past year in the bubble where 144 players in the WNBA all gathered during the break, the two-day break of observance and standing in solidarity with the Milwaukee Bucks after Jacob Blake, the Jacob Blake shooting. To realize the impact that it wasn't just one or two athletes, it was entire sports leagues. Wow. and so to me, if you don't talk about the step forwards, you're, you know, the steps you're taking forward and how important it is to understand, it's not necessarily about what people think is right or what today's morals and values and things like that. It's what's right. And if you continue to work towards that, like, I am so proud of our league because, you know, even looking at kneeling, it's like that was unacceptable four years ago, five years ago, and now it's like, if you don't, you're like, oh, so you're not kneeling? You know, like, what are you gonna do? We got booed in 2017 for not coming out for the national anthem. We had so many players from overseas and foreign players on our team that we didn't feel comfortable making that decision. They didn't understand everything that was going into kneeling. And so just as one of the captains on the team, like, we can't.

Put them in that situation. Make them stand and we're kneeling or make them kneel.

It's not their country. Yeah. And whatever we're gonna do we were gonna do together. And we decided to stay in the locker room. We got booed in Minnesota. Booed during the finals game. And so to think now how that has shifted so much even in just that practice and what is accepted, I'm really proud to be a part of that change. And, you know, I think that sports leagues definitely have been a catalyst for that.

Yeah. What can athletes do moving forward? after this year to support in making change. Because there's a lot of, also people talk and say athletes should just be, you know, not saying anything and just playing the game and not trying to get into, I guess, whatever politics or society's issues and just show up and play. What do you think needs to happen moving forward with, with athletes and with leagues of all types?

I can only speak for myself when I feel as though I continually educate myself constantly. I have three different news outlets, you know, top five or six news breakdowns every single morning that's sent to my phone that I read so I can get different opinions and different viewpoints.

What are those outlets?

So I am very, I'm into, so I'm a flip boarder.

Yeah.

Newsweek, MSNBC, CNN. So those are kind of my four that I have sent to my email that you can get the rundown for the top five, or you can do the Reuters, where it's like the news in three minutes if you have three minutes. And so I'm big into that. My dad, I get that from him. I'm a huge history buff. I'm reading all the time. So I feel as though, like, now we're running into a time where it's like athletes are educated. We're not speaking on something that we don't have knowledge on. Just as your dentist is able and you feel as though that they're They fit the criteria to speak on politics. I want to make sure as athletes, like we are too, I have a college degree, feel as though I keep up with the times, I understand different viewpoints, and I can listen and hear more, but at the same time, I do feel the things that we're speaking on, you have to be knowledgeable about. And so honestly, I believe athletes that are speaking out, They are. And so I would advise them to continue to use their platform. There's no other place in the world that they're told to just shut up and clean teeth. Like that's not, am I right? Like you're never told as a dentist, like you know what, you just shut up and clean teeth. Like nobody says that. So to tell athletes to shut up and dribble, when you don't know, you know, what they're doing in their spare time or if they're speaking about something that makes you uncomfortable, if they're speaking the truth and you know, knowledgeable about the subject and opinions are opinions, but at the same time, like, I don't think anybody has the right to tell anybody to shut up and do what they do. Yeah.

You were born in St. Louis. I lived in St. Louis for eight years. And then you moved to Naperville.

Yes.

And I had an internship in Naperville in college, actually, and I also-- Naperville-- Connection. There's a memory where I actually qualified for the national championships at North Central College. North Central College, yeah. It's a beautiful little campus, small little school, but beautiful. And I played a playoff football game there as well, actually, that we won. So I have some good memories. Good memories in Naperville, yeah. And you grew, I mean, in this community, it was majority white kids that you went to school with, right? What do you say to white friends that reach out to you during this time? The types of kids you grew up with or friends now, what do you say to white white people on how they can be supportive to you personally as an individual and also with everything that's happening in the world.

You know what I struggle with? I struggle with, and this is my best friend. We've been friends since we were 11 years old. Absolute best friend. She has two beautiful boys. We see each other all the time, especially before COVID We always made a trip. She stays with us, her and her husband and family. And she was one of the first to reach out and basically ask, what can I do? How can I help? What can I post? How can I be an ally? So honestly, it's really just, I think, listening, but at the same time, I struggle because I don't ever want to be seen as the other, but you're a different type of thing. And I think some of the rooms that I walk into, especially being a woman of color, a lot of people assume that I'm not like anybody else. Because you haven't really seen people like that sit at the table. You know, at TNT, the same thing. You know, I go back and forth with the guys all the time. They're like, man, like, it's so awesome how you go back and forth with them. Like, there's 20 million other people like that that can do this. It's just they gotta get a chance. Yeah. And, you know, I think we allow people to fit you know, okay, we have one at the table, but we're scared to bring two or three. And it's like, that's my biggest thing is, like, open your eyes to understand that it doesn't just have to be one puzzle piece. There can be a couple more. And so I think that's what I challenge my white friends and my white allies to do within their own organizations, corporations, friends, I don't know, everything is to understand it's not just one place that can fit, you know, like you can fit a couple more public puzzle pieces in there. Eventually I hope to get to a point where it's like the person that fits, you know, fits the job. You know, and we talk a lot about just in terms of hiring. What if they did an experiment in the book Blink and they were talking about the orchestra has always been all male because males just play the orchestra better. And so for one year, The orchestra had family members that were trying out, so they had to use a screen and it was 50-50 picked women and men. So for me, I think the unconscious bias, like you look at yourself every day in the mirror and you ask yourself, you,'re only gonna know that much, but if you go out and you seek, you try to find your blind spots, that's when we're really gonna accomplish, like what we all hope to have is what, you know, equality and judging it based on the person.

Yeah, that's great. I got a couple of final questions for you. This has been great, but I'm curious, if you had to get a tattoo on your forehead, permanent for the rest of your life, that had a word or a phrase that you would always be reminded of when you're in the mirror and other people would be reminded of when they look at you, what would that word or phrase be?

Word or phrase? intention. I think if everybody goes forward with pure intention, whether you're right or whether you're wrong, like if, I don't believe just solely judging people on intention, because you gotta have some action behind it as well. But I think if you, if people would like purify their intention and ask themselves what's your actual intention and then maybe like at least be, you know, cognizant of their intention going into a situation, I think the world would be a lot better, honestly. You know, I sometimes call my grandma and I tell her I intended to send you a card.

Right, right, right.

This is me telling you I intended to send you a card, and I know it's not based on intended, but I did think about you and, you know, whatever. And then also just when you go in situations of problems or chaos or being uncomfortable, you ask yourself, what is the intention? What am I going into this to do? Am I trying to solve the problem or am I trying to you know, make it worse. And so I think that would be something that I always talk about.

Yeah, the power of intention. Oprah talks about that a lot. Power of intention. I asked this question to Kobe towards the end of our interview. I asked him his definition of love. I'm curious, what's your definition of love? And when do you feel the most loved?

My definition of love Is, I mean, I think the definition in my dictionary for love would have a picture of my daughter next to it, because I think I would do be, have, give, sacrifice, accomplish whatever for her, honestly. And to me, I don't think you understand love until you have a child. That's just from my perception. She honestly has changed every single thing about me. And, you know, I try to be better for her, I try to look at situations in a different way for her. And, yeah, so that would be my definition of it.

And when do you feel the most loved?

I feel the most loved when I see some of, like, the qualities in my daughter. I see them come to life. For instance, you know, when she just randomly will do something super sweet or, you know, she knows I drink tea every night. And so her and her friend had a sleepover one night and I got back and totally didn't expect her to make me tea or anything. And so she had a note on the table on the counter like, Mom, here's your tea. Make sure you stir it before you drink it. and it was just like, it's like those little acts of service and little things that make people know that you're thinking about them and that they're thinking about you, to me is when I feel the most loved.

And I've watched some videos of you talk about legacy and how important that is for you. What do you want people to say about you when you're gone?

I believe legacy, you know, can be two ways. You can take or you can leave. And there's a lot of people that within their legacy, they're taking, they're taking, you know, people's time, they're taking, you know, they're taking things and it can still be a positive legacy. But for me, I want to leave, you know, I want to leave impact. And I really believe that you are, you know, your children are your legacy. You know, you're hopefully leaving them behind when you leave this earth. And so the way that they speak of you, the way they talk about you, the lessons that you taught them. For me, I am a legacy of Coach Summit. You know, every day when I'm parenting, whatever I'm doing, there's some of Coach that are, that's, you know, in there. And so just to have that impact in my life and to know that, like, when I do leave this Earth, you know, I want to impact individuals with their passion in their everyday lives.

That's cool. That's cool. This question is called the three truths. I'll ask everyone at the end. So hypothetical question. Imagine it's your last day on earth and you've achieved and accomplished everything you want to accomplish. But for whatever reason, you've got to take all of your accomplishments with you. All the content, this interview, anything you ever create, videos of you from the past, they're all go with you. But you get to leave behind three things you know to be true. to the world. And this is all they would have access to are these three lessons you would share or what I like to call three truths. What would you say are yours?

My three truths that I would leave behind would be, it can be a lesson. It doesn't have to be.

A lesson, yeah, a lesson that you.

Share with the world.

I know the cliche you are your biggest competition. But growing up, my dad used to always tell me, like the measuring stick for others, you might be head and shoulders above. But what you're truly able to accomplish and what you're truly able to do, if you base yourself all the time on what other people are doing, you're gonna sell yourself short sometimes. And so I think for me it would be like, you truly are your biggest competition.

I like that. That's one.

Another competition type of thing because I'm driven by that is, you know, I posted a couple days ago about how when you compete against how undisciplined you are, when you compete against, you know, looking in the mirror and knowing your blind spots and the things that you struggle at compete against everything within yourself that you know you need to work on, you start competing against that instead of competing against somebody that should have that. the job that you wanted, you're gonna be so much better. Yeah. And so I think that that's, those are two things. And then the last thing would be just enjoying the process. Like enjoying the everydayness, enjoying, I mean, we look up and it's freaking December already. Crazy. Crazy year. It's gone fast. I mean, what do they say? The days are long and the years are short. Like, that's how it is. So if there's anything, I really believe in enjoying the moment, enjoying the process, and, you know, living with the results. Yeah.

I want to acknowledge you for a moment, Candace, in your childlike spirit and energy. I feel like even though you're a mom and you're an adult and you're this professional athlete, you have this childlike curiosity and energy. You're a lifelong learner, which I love about you and I appreciate about you. and just your joy. I really acknowledge your joy because I think the world needs more of that. And I think we as individuals need more joy in times of stress and anxiety. And your wisdom. I acknowledge your wisdom as well. Your ability to be coachable because a lot of people, when they achieve something, they think they've got it figured out. And you continue to say, I'm here to learn. I'm here to grow. I'm here to look myself in the mirror and see what are my blind spots. and I really acknowledge you for that. It's no reason, there's no doubt in my mind why you're such a great athlete and great human being because of these qualities.

That means so much. You know, I think just in the people that I've met, it's the versatility aspect. When you meet somebody that it's like doing other things, you find your passion and you find your energy day to day because you have this or you have this or you have this, like you're running a marathon. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're like doing, you know, you played football, you're doing basketball, you're doing a number of things. And so for me, it's like, if we run the same play, I'm not that person. I'm going to struggle with it. I'll just tell you, no, honestly, if I just have one thing I have to have, I'm so much better when I have, you know, so much. And so that's kind of where the.

Passion comes from, for sure. Have you read the book Range yet? No, I need to read this. I think David Epstein is the guy's name. Okay. An author, I had him on the show. Hopefully that's his name, I can't remember if that's the author's mixed up. But Range, he talks about athletes actually become better when they have a range of sports they play as kids because you can tie in these different things and aspects from baseball to football as opposed to just playing baseball year round. If you play football and baseball, you'll learn more from each sport that you can apply to that final sport. So true.

Same thing in life.

When you learn, you know, I'm a big salsa dancer.

That's awesome.

I've been dancing for about 15 years. That's so cool. I love it. And I feel like it helps me in other areas of my life. I'm learning Spanish now. It's very challenging, but I feel like it's helping me in other areas of my life. So I'm doing the marathon. It's like I'm learning patience and sticking it out longer and I like to do things So all these things develop range and make us more interesting.

I love that. I'm gonna read that book.

Check it out, range.

Yes, my parents were so, like I played soccer, I played volleyball, I played basketball, I did a bunch of sports before I was able to settle on basketball because they were like, no, we want you to try out a lot of stuff. And so that definitely helped me.

If you didn't play basketball, what would you have gone pro in?

Pro, you know, honestly, And to this day, I want to be a historian. Like my goal is that one interview kind of similar, no comparison, but like how remember in the TNT they had Barack Obama and it was like Chicagoan under his name, like not president, but Chicagoan. I want to be historian. I want to be historian under just one documentary just where I'm on there just like talking about JFK or something. And then they're just like Candace Parker historian. That's like my goal. So I would have been, yeah, a history teacher or some type of professor.

If I wouldn't have played basketball. That's cool, that's cool. Well, people can follow you and they should follow you, Candace underscore Parker on Twitter, Candace Parker on Instagram and Facebook, and follow your daughter, TikToks. You guys do amazing TikToks together, but great content over there.

You got a podcast, but it's only during the season, is that right? It's during the NBA season, yes, Ludlow and Parker, and we talk not just focused on basketball, we kind of like to Explore the versatility of our guests a little bit. We actually have had some amazing guests. We had Kobe on. We've had, you know, Jimmy Butler. We've had, you know, Snoop Dogg.

We try to mix it up. Get some range.

Get some range with those interviews.

How else can we support you and serve you?

Well, I recently teamed up with D-Wade, CP3, and Carmelo Anthony to to be a part of the social change fund, which is basically trying to level the playing field and to reach equality with whether it's in social justice, whether it's voting. This past election season, we teamed up with the HBCUs to allow Uber or allow Lyft to have codes to, you know, give people rides to the polls. So we were trying to you know, do as much as we can in the community to support, you know, different types of businesses. Yeah. Hopefully allow more people more opportunities.

How can people get involved in that or support that?

Well, you can go to Social Change Fund. You can either donate. We have, you have the ability to do that on the website or, you know, honestly, we would love to have, you know, different communities, different initiatives. I know education is huge thing now that we're trying to figure out how we can impact. And so that's kind of, yeah, that's great.

That's cool. Well, I'm gonna be making a donation right after you leave. Thank you. I encourage you guys to make a donation as well. This has been a pleasure, Candace. I'm very glad that we got to connect. Hopefully we can do more stuff in the future. Final question for you. What's your definition of greatness?

My definition of greatness is repeatedly getting up and doing something because you know that that's going to get you where you want to go, even when you don't feel like it. I feel like it's kind of, greatness is the definition of commitment where it says, what is it? Doing what you say you're going to do even when the moment passed that you said it in. And I feel like that's greatness, honestly, is continuing whether it's when the lights are on, when the lights are off, when the gym is empty, when the gym is full, continuing to do what you know you've prepared and what you should do.

Candace, thank you so much. Awesome.

Appreciate it. Thank you.

Thank you.

I appreciate it. My friend, thank you so much for taking the time to listen to this episode. If you enjoyed it, then you know what to do. Make sure to share this with a friend that you think would be inspired by Candace's story as well. If you know people that want to improve their life, that want to become champions, that want to become better with mindset, better habits, and learn the habits of winners, then I don't know anyone better to learn from than Candace. Lewis Parker. So, make sure to copy and paste this link wherever you're listening to this over on Apple Podcast or Spotify or any podcast app you're listening to or just copy and paste the link lewishouse.com/1057 and text a few friends, post it on social media, put it in a WhatsApp group chat, whatever you got to do, get the message out there because when you share this, you're empowering someone else to improve their life as well. Make sure to click the Subscribe button over on Apple podcast also and leave us a review and rating anytime that new people subscribe and they rate and review the show over on Apple podcast. It really helps us impact more lives together. So if you subscribe right now and leave a rating and review, you're making an impact by helping reach more people with this powerful message right now. So please do that. And if you want inspirational messages from me sent to your phone every single week, then text the word podcast right now to 614-350-3960 and get on my texting list where I send you some behind the scenes messages to inspire you every single week. A big thank you to Candace. She's an inspiration and just a great human being. So make sure you follow her and check out her stuff. She's an inspiration and I'm excited to be friends and to connect with her more in the future and support her journey. And I want to leave you with this quote from Roy T. Bennett, When things do not go your way, remember that every challenge, every adversity contains within it the seeds of opportunity and growth. I know we've been through a lot of challenges over the last year, and some people are still in the middle of those challenges, but look at these challenges as opportunities for growth, as feedback, information that you need to improve something that's not working. I want to remind you, if you haven't been told lately, I am telling you that you are loved, you are worthy, and you matter. I'm so grateful for you, and you know what time it is. It's time to go out there and do something great.

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Yes.

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