839 How to Attract Wealth and Believe in Your Worth with Kyle Cease

This is episode number 839 with New York Times best-selling author Kyle Cease. Welcome to the School of Greatness. My name is Lewis Howes, former pro athlete turned lifestyle entrepreneur. And each week we bring you an inspiring person or message to help you discover how to unlock your inner greatness. Thanks for spending some time with me today. Now let the class begin. Lao Tzu said, because one believes in oneself, one doesn't try to convince others. Because one is content with oneself, one doesn't need others approval. Because one accepts oneself, the whole world accepts him or her. This is going to be a good one. We dive in deep with the iconic, inspirational, hilarious, Philosophical Kyle Seis today. And before we dive in, we are two weeks away from the Summit of Greatness, where Kyle is speaking at. That's right, Summit of Greatness, Columbus, Ohio. Almost 2,000 people registered from around the world to connect, to be inspired, to learn, to grow. We've got incredible speakers like Kyle Seis, Ed Mylett, Leanne Rhimes, and other great surprises. Make sure to go to summitofgreatness.com right now. Get your tickets because it's going to comin' in two weeks. We only do this once a year. And when it's gone, you gotta wait until next year. So don't wait and say, oh, we'll do this next year. Do it right now. Again, it's gonna be an amazing time. Every year is a bigger and bigger celebration. So many people have lifelong friendships, create business partners, relationships, things like that, and really start to take their life to the next level. So go to summitofgreatness.com, Come watch Kyle and many other amazing speakers and connect with some incredible people from around the world. Now, if you don't know who Kyle is, he's a New York Times, USA Today, and Wall Street Journal bestselling author. He's a comedian and a transformational speaker. He has two number one comedy central specials and in addition to leading his own live events, he has spoken with renowned teachers like Eckhart Tolle, Jim Carrey, Michael Beckwith, Louis CK, Tony Robbins, Deepak Chopra, and Marianne Williamson. He has been a guest speaker at thousands of colleges, summits, Fortune 500 conferences, and he's also made more than 100 various TV and movie appearances, including 10 Things I Hate About yout, Not Another Teen Movie, Jimmy Kimmel Live, Comics Unleashed, and numerous VH1 shows. And in this interview, we talk about how chasing something can mean you're actually not ready for it. And I talk about an important lesson I learned when I really wanted money and felt broke and how it never came to me until I let that go. The important difference between a calling and a justification. Some things we're called into and other things we justify doing. How trying to control others actually gives them more power over you. That's right. It's crazy, isn't it? Creating space for money and how refocusing on yourself will actually bring and attract you wealth. Kyle talks about this and breaks it down. Understanding your value and the power of saying no, that and so much more, this is a game changer. If you really want to attract more wealth and learn how to believe in your worth, then this one's gonna be powerful. Do me a favor, share it with one friend today. Make an impact on someone's life. Someone who you might feel is stuck in their life or feel like they wanna break through money conversations or wants to earn more or feels like they're always trapped with the bills of life, just text them this link that you're listening to on Apple Podcast or Spotify or you can use the link lewishouse.com/839. Be a hero, be a champion to one person today. Just text them this link to one person or you can post it in a WhatsApp group chat or post on a social media and tag me and Kyle as well on Instagram and let us know you're listening. this is going to help a lot of people. And I want you to be a champion in someone's life today by sharing this valuable free resource with them. Are you ready to level up your business? Intuit QuickBooks has got your back. Forget stressing over unpaid invoices or tracking expenses. QuickBooks takes care of all that so you can focus on growing. Let QuickBooks be your all in one tool to help with the day to day tasks so you can stay focused on the big picture. Manage and grow your business all in one place. Intuit QuickBooks, your way to money. Get 90% off for three months, limited time only. Terms and conditions apply. Money movement services are provided by Intuit Payments Inc. Licensed as a money transmitter by the New York State Department of Financial Services. 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Visit wonderfulpistachios.com to learn more. And without further ado, let's dive into this episode with the one, the only Kyle Sease. Welcome back, everyone, to the School of Greatest Podcast. We have the caring comedian, I just came up with that. Kyle SeC in the house. The caring comedian. I think that should be your new tagline.

I like that.

Even though you're not a comedian necessarily anymore.

And I don't care.

And you don't care. But you care about people.

I do.

You care about people's transformation, you care about their freedom and their personal power, I would say. Is that accurate? Yeah.

I think sometimes too much, but.

Too much.

Yeah.

Does it hurt you when you care too much?

What I mean by that is I could do the work on, I really believe that when When we're wanting something, anything in the world to change, I find that it actually is reflecting something that's inside you that hasn't been seen.

For example.

For example, okay, there's times where I will be in the middle, I do work with people and I can kind of see often when they have a deep desire, right?

For what? I want to make more money. How do you get a relationship? I want to lose the weight.

Or you know one that I see a lot is when they can't figure out which way to go in a certain scenario. Which way should I do this?

You mean like a relationship? Should I stay in the marriage?

Should I get divorced?

I'm not sure.

What that dilemma means is you have a belief there's a wrong way to do it. And if you think there's a wrong way, what does that look like? And what we find is when I work with people after a long time, what they find is that the wrong way is I'll go through something that I went through when I was five. Like, in other words, there might be a part of you that's controlling and trying to control a situation. Why are we needing to control the situation? Because when you were five, your parents fought a lot and you were the one that had to organize everything and you unconsciously picked up that they'll divorce if you don't, and now you actually feel like the entire world's gonna fall apart if you don't. Most of the people I meet that really wanna make money often have a major fear of not having it, which is weird because energetically you're putting out to the world I'm scared of not having it much more than I want it. Yeah. Right? Because I find that this is a weird thing to say, but when you really want something, you're not ready for it. You're not in the alignment for it. So true. Right? Like, let's say you're someone who believes who you are is someone who makes $20,000 a year. Like, that's in your story. You grew up that way. You heard sentences like, Money doesn't grow on trees, or It's the root of all evil. So you have these deep-rooted beliefs that you're evil, Right, if you do this. So you have this thing going and then that also is what drives you bizarrely. Like you're scared of that, right? So I work with so many people and if someone offers that person a million dollars, that's death to the story of who they are. So weirdly you're going to be in this position where you want to take it but you're scared of it, right? Because it's death to who you are. This is a reason I believe lottery winners go broke.

Yeah.

Right? So the book I wrote is called the Illusion of Money: why Chasing Money is Stopping youg From Receiving It. Chasing money has a very different vibration than receiving it.

Mm.

Right? When you chase something, you're saying, this is what I can see that I want. And if you can see what you want, usually it's through the eyes of the ego because there's so much stuff you can't see. Yeah. So you're sitting here looking through this tunnel. This is what I want. I can see. It's that one person. That's the love of my life. I'm sure that's my soulmate. Meanwhile, you haven't met almost everybody. Right.

Right.

It's that much money, it's that stuff. You can feel this needy vibration. And I've worked with so many people who say, Dude, I don't know what it is. I keep working my ass off. I keep trying to make money and I can barely pay rent.

And I thought, what if-- I've got no time, I've got no energy, I've.

Got responsibilities, all these things. And what if those are the reasons you aren't making any money? What if you're working your ass off is actually why you can't make money? And what if instead of working on getting money, you work on you and changing your vibration to leave the story that who I am is 20,000 a year. To leave the story that who I am is what my parents say. So if you go to a receiving vibration, the first thing you do is receive what's here. Like it sounds corny, but we usually don't pay attention to what's here right now. Right now, you and I are here. Everything we think our story is, our accomplishments, our problems, are BS. We're just this moment. That's true. And everyone watching this, if you really understand the highest truth of what's going on, We're all even. There's no this person is better or less, and there's none of that. We're just this space that's here. Now from here, you have sky's the limit possibilities. But if it goes through the lens of who I am as this past story, this limitation, this person that tried to achieve it and failed, is someone who gets love by failing over and over, or someone who has to stay small.

Significance by failing, right? Right. Because people start to say, oh, you're gonna be okay. I'm gonna help you. I'm gonna give you more time or money or attention.

Yeah. Because you're not succeeding, right? Right, you get all this, exactly.

People give you handouts or support you when you're failing.

Yeah, you get a lot of love when you're failing.

Yeah, significantly.

There's a lot of people that will connect to you, there's a lot of people, and so we're going, if I become something, I won't get that sense of connection that felt like my mom.

Right.

That connection that I get with my friends or that person that I dated that actually weirdly feels familiar to my childhood that I now associate this as love. Meanwhile, the truth of you is this space right here. This sounds really weird, but this space right here contains all kinds of ideas. It's almost like we're an antenna and we can pick this space up and just sit and receive, first of all, the idea that we're enough. Like, what if there is no purpose to chase and you are purpose just by existing? What if you can't get out of purpose? What if that's not a thing to chase? So that's the first thing. Just so, okay, I'm in purpose.

Yep, you are purpose.

And then that, the first thing that happens is that scares the part of you that says, no, like I'm sure people watching this right now would go, oh, he doesn't know my story. Yeah, but that's your story, which is past, so it's fictional, because there's no such thing as the past. So everything about you that you perceive about yourself based on past evidence is bullshit, everything. Everything, your family history, everything. It matters and it needs to be seen and loved and honored. We don't repress it. But you're the space right here that contains infinite possibilities and the space for that past. So when you realize that you're just this moment right here and then do the actual work of connecting to it. See, most of us connect to the stories and connect to everyone's addictions online and connect to the problems. But what if you actually pay attention to this? I spent two years, two hours a day listening to silence. All my old stories show up and they're like, oh my God, I can't just meditate for two hours. This is crazy. And then they leave and I'm just here and then there's this silence that you hear. And after the silence is showing up, eventually it holds space for billion dollar ideas, crazy possibilities. And the part of you that thinks I would never be able to do that because my parents said this, is gone. So it's very easy to receive those ideas. So to me, what I find is that the more I can see what I want, the more it's looking through the egoic lens. And when I just go, I don't have any idea what I want. I'm just going to move moment to moment, doing what I perceive as the highest vibration thing that connects me to this space for real. Then you can hear this one, and it'll just give you one step, right? It just gives you go for a walk. That's a leap because usually we're like, yeah, but I need to look at my phone for 100.

You gotta work.

That's your old story that says every yeah, but is an old story. Every I can't because is an old story. It's not including the possibilities of different frequencies that are trying to reach you right here. You're looking through the lens of your limitations. Right, so we can see it in little doses when you have those first moments show up that go, what if you started a band or moved to Italy right now? And then you immediately access something in you that made you able to hear that, but it's bigger than the story of what you think you are. So you immediately have to come up with a why that would be ridiculous to explain why you're ignoring your body. So a rule that I have is every time I'm justifying anything, I know it's not my highest calling. Like, that friend treated me like crap that one time, but they were really nice before. If I'm doing that, I'm coming with a reason to explain why I'm ignoring my heart.

Yeah, justifying it. Yeah. So, like why you hear women who are in relationships or men, I guess, but you hear a lot of women who say, you know, well, he emotionally abuses me, physically abuses me, but he's there for me sometimes when I need him or something. There's a but, right? But he's a good person inside, he's just messed up or whatever it is.

Right. So that to me is the father of my kids. Is the difference between a calling, 'cause a calling you don't justify. Like I have a two-year-old daughter and I never say, well she gets good medical insurance. That's why I keep her. Right. You know, why I do this for a living, there's just no explanation for it. But we all know what it's like to have a job and be like, eventually they're going to promote me. What are you doing? You're explaining why you're ignoring your body. And your body contains all the next steps. And when you do something that doesn't move you from the highest you, you cut off the higher level of ideas, the impact on the world, the connection to the moment. And you're saying out loud, I'm this old story. So you stay in the boundaries of the old story by staying in that stagnant story, that stagnant relationship, that stagnant job. the place you don't want to live anymore. So I've been working with people a lot and watching them have these moments where they go, well, I'd like to live here, but, and I go, let's go. Right? I want to do this. Let's go. We don't know what's coming here. You're only scared, and I think I said this on your other podcast, but you're only scared because you can measure what you will lose. You can't see what you'll gain.

Game changer.

And the thing I always think of is imagine if Michael Jordan or Michael Jackson or Oprah had enough justification to stay in a mediocre job in like 1981, right? So here's Michael Jackson and he works as a manager at Applebee's, right? And you're sitting, you're seeing this talent in him and you're trying to tell him, dude, you should do other stuff. He's wearing like one oven mitt. Why do I want one oven mitt? And you're like, you should do, I can feel an artist here. And he's like, I love to, but I gotta make money. Applebee's is gonna promote me. And you're like, dude, you're gonna make money. I swear to God, there's millions in this. I know. I hear your fantasy. That's really cute. I get it. I get I could be magical, but I'm realistic. And they call that realistic. That's not realistic. You know how many times people come to my events and go, Dude, that's great, Kyle, but I gotta live in the real world. And I go, what's the real world? And you know what it is? It's when they sit at home and come up with all the ways that shit's gonna go wrong. Yeah. Which is actually delusion. and fantasy and fear. That's not the real world. What's real right now? Both our hearts are beating. There's a space here. This is the only thing real. The people watching, you're breathing. This is the only thing true. And we call this airy fairy and stressing all day and worrying about all the crap the news hand selected to make you freak out. is called the Real World. Do you know how not scary the world actually is? Like, if you go outside, it's not just horror and what it looks like on the news. That's real, right? There's a lot of buildings not on fire today that the news isn't focused on, right? You can drive down the street.

There's a lot of people that aren't being shot at today.

Right, there's a lot of families that went to bed safe and woke up in the morning and no one cares because we go, this dark world is the only world. And I'm not saying that's not there, that's there and needs to be honored. But in saying that's the world, we're denying everything that's right in front of us, including the space that has all the information, this source, whatever you wanna call it. Some people call it God, some people call it the universe, you can call it your intuition. I don't care if you're atheist or Christian or whatever. This moment we all have, this is true. This is true, and then we never pay attention to it. We're crazy. And when you start meditating and listening to the silence, you see all these people that are just running themselves, and you just see it like this crazy illness. And then you're sitting here with all these insights. What if I create that? Boom, million dollar idea, this thing, this thing. And you're so fulfilled by the calling that when you do create money, you don't blow it on a bunch of addictions. which you only have because you're so out of alignment with yourself. The only reason we have addictions is because we aren't connected to ourself. So here's all these people that are drinking and overeating and then have to spend more money at the hospitals because they're overeating out of alignment. Then they go to a job that they hate, spend eight hours hating it, go home, hate that, watch Netflix all day. And then overeat, go through the addictions again, buy the most expensive car to try to get laid. Right, to be fulfilled to have self-worth, yeah. And then here you actually are, if you connect to this moment, the real, not to be a cliche, but the internet, as I'm sure Beckwith said this before or something.

The internet.

Right, this is real. And so what this book is about is, and this is the galley, this is just the proof. I promise the copy you'll get is a professional one. I'm giving you a professional one. Yes. But the book is about, we are so focused on making money, Almost every thought we have is, yeah, but I gotta get rent paid next month. I gotta, and we're sacrificing our soul for it. And my question is, if we're, instead of throwing away our soul for the guarantee of the illusion of money.

Or illusion of safety, right?

And yeah, a lot of people believe money equals safety. Yet, I can think of people that were broke, then made millions of dollars, and thought, what if I lose it? So they didn't feel safe. Or freedom, what if I lose this? So you're under the illusion that freedom is outside of you. Just by saying money equals freedom, you're implying you're not freedom.

Or you need to have something to have freedom.

Right.

Something external.

So what's the real truth? In my eyes, you're just freedom, but you've created an unnecessary route to get to what you are. So you said, Finally, when I see a million dollars, so you cut off the freedom that you are, or when I finally fall in love, You cut it all off, and then when I get it, now I can feel, I can give myself permission to feel the thing that I could have felt in the first place.

The whole time, the whole 10-year journey it took to get there, whatever it was.

I put my own connection to source, myself, whatever, on the other end of this achievement. Now my question is, what if you reverse that? What if you just start feeling the freedom that you are?

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What if you start feeling in love? Right? What if you start feeling the feeling because that actually is your natural state? I think Eckhart Tolle once said, Falling in love is the real you because it's the absence of you wanting something. It's the absence of you thinking something will make you happy. You finally have a moment where you don't think you need something to be happy. So your giddiness has nothing to do with the person. It has to do with that you finally decided you're enough.

You love yourself. I'm in love with me.

It can't be the person because a month later you could not feel that same way about them. So if that person was what made you feel in love.

You're screwed. If you need someone else to make you happy, you need someone else to make you feel in love. If that's what you're, if you're always needing that, they should be able to add to you, right? Like you should be able to add the feeling of love, add the feeling.

Of happiness and joy, but it shouldn't be the reliant thing as the other person. Imagine if you get to a place where you're whole, where you get that you're whole, where all of the voids that you've created in yourself by living on social media, you instead fill them yourself. Yeah. Right? You fill them yourself. You actually say goodbye and cry out the old story that who you are is what your parents told you, that you're trying to get love through the conditional way that your parents gave you in like the 70s. You cry that out.

I was born in the 80s, but yeah.

Yeah, well, I'm trying to keep your average audience, I don't know. Whatever it was. You cry that out and you're just left with you. You fill this place. By the way, first thing, you'd never end up in a relationship with someone who's codependent on you or needy or people pleasing or taker from you because you can see through it because you're not codependent on them. It's true. So then you have someone who also did that work. And now you got one plus one is infinity versus one half plus one half equals one fourth. It's an amazing feeling, because I'm in.

A relationship now that is that. I was telling you before, I was just like, Man, it's just a different feeling. Yes. And I'm also not afraid to lose it. Like it's the first time. It's why it'll stay. It's been crazy because it's long distance and we're both like, Man, this is so magical. And every now and then she'll be like, kind of a little scared of like moving to LA and being together and what if it doesn't work? And I'm like, you,'re gonna be fine and I'm gonna be fine. You have tons of men that are hitting on you all the time who are super successful and inspiring and loving and caring. You're gonna be fine. And I've got tons of women who are amazing in my life. I'll be fine. It's gonna suck, it's gonna hurt, it's gonna be sad, and then we're both gonna be fine. that's the truth. This is the first time I haven't been. It's so weird. It's the first time I'm 36. It's the first time I haven't been jealous.

Wow.

In any relationship. And it's probably the girl I should be the most insecure and jealous of because she's a massive celebrity. She's one of the most beautiful women I've ever met. Like, she's got every big celebrity male hitting on her all the time. Billionaire, like, everything. But I have like zero jealousy. It's weird. Maybe because I've just killed my old self that needed, I don't know, some validation or something or security. I'm just like, if it doesn't work, I'm gonna be okay.

Wouldn't that be a concept?

It's amazing.

Wouldn't it be a concept to be like, I don't need anything from you. I love you because I love myself and I just wanna be the highest choice so you choose to be with me. versus we made a deal six years ago, so you better not. You hear that, like the difference, one is control, one is fear. You better not. We set our vows 10 years ago. That's control. That's a codependent, and you're moving based on fear. So you have no idea what your heart feels, you have no idea what you want. Everything is just don't screw up something. And the idea that you could also just go to a place where you continually connect to yourself you meditate, you make your highest moves, you let go of the things that feel heavy in your life, you actually become the highest value for this other person, so they choose to commit to you.

Every day.

Because like you're the best choice.

Exactly.

Right?

Not because they have to or they're forced to or because they're married and society tells you you need to stay together or whatever it may be.

Correct, right? Like I love you no matter what you do. the most powerful thing in the world. You know, someone once said to me once, he was talking to me, he goes, I just have the hardest time trusting women. And I said, what is trusting for you, that they do what you decide? Trusting to most people means they better not do what I've decided they can't do.

An expectation.

Right, it's expectation and it's control. How about I trust you to unfold how you need to? How about I trust you to love, what you need to love, I trust you to go through whatever experience you need to go with, I trust you to follow your heart, and I'm going to be here loving you all the way, no matter what you do.

That's big.

Could you imagine the power of that for you to be able to say that to someone, right? I trust you all the way, I love you and your unfolding, you do what you need to do, and I'm here because that's called love for real. Everything else that we've defined as love is attachment.

All manipulation.

It is. and in controlling anyone, you're totally controlled. I remember reading a book once that said, imagine you have a donkey on a rope. Like, this is your donkey, right? It was an old book, so they used donkey as the example. You have your camel, and you're, okay. And then it said, well, realize now you're stuck on the other end of the rope. So here you are saying, you,'re mine, but now I'm stuck to you. So my life is don't do. Right, so now I can't flow either. So the more you try to control anyone in a relationship, the more you try to control what they do, whatever, the more you're controlled. Because your focus is don't do, and basically what you're saying is don't do what I felt in the past. Don't do- Don't hurt me in the past.

Right, yeah.

Because every time we control anyone or control anything or control any scenario, we're scared to have a scenario that we unconsciously we don't understand is in our body.

And what I'm hearing you say is when we try to control someone else's freedom, we're not free either.

Completely. How could you be?

We're a prisoner.

Yes. So take that all the way. If you're scared of what people will say about you, every person that talks shit about us is handing us their power. Every person that talks shit about any person, you hear that? They're handing you their power. When you're worried about what they'd say, when Marianne said something on the debates and then everyone was writing about her, She has all of their power. She doesn't want it. She's trying to give them their own power and everyone's on her, you know, because she's breaking through in their body, no matter what it is. When you are controlling someone, they have your power. When you're telling them what to do, when you're talking shit about someone, they have their power. They have your power. Everyone has your power.

You just be a monk in the woods and the mountains.

Well, one thing that was a huge change is realizing there's no competition in everyone in my life. I want them to succeed.

Yeah, that's it.

It makes me really powerful.

That's been something that's been huge for me over the last, I would say, like four years. Because my whole life as an athlete was, I need to win in second place means I'm not lovable. Right, so here-- Second, third, like last place.

To a parent? To what? Did your dad teach you that or something?

No, I just think, like, no one taught me that. Like they were all, my parents were very supportive. Like they wanted us to compete, but they weren't like, you suck if you're second. They were like the most loving.

Did you experience some trauma in your past when you were second or see someone make fun of something?

I was just always made fun of. And so I was like, I'm gonna prove everyone wrong. And I'm gonna be the best so they can't laugh at me anymore. I was picked last on a team actually when I was in fourth grade. I was picked last in school. Our class did a dodgeball for recess.

Yeah.

Played a game. And there was two captains. on the class. And they picked all the boys first and then they picked all the girls second and then they picked me last.

Wow.

I remember being like, never again will I be picked last.

Right. So do you see, even though it was successful and killed it and you did amazing, that still fear of feeling something is your driver. Now I'm a huge fan of that and there's a higher even still.

Of course. Right?

Because if our driver is to not be bullied again in junior high, That's nice, but what happens if you just go up? You don't have to create a, so ego does that. Ego creates a sabotage, and then it overcomes the sabotage it created. That's what ego does. It goes, I gotta create a problem, so I'm gonna find the shittiest friend and then overcome that. Or life is about achieving, so I gotta overcome, but I have to have a problem to overcome. So what if you just don't have any problems as much by, I mean, still they show up, we just go up versus like down and back up to mediocre again. Right. Although you're not mediocre, you're profound, but.

Like that's-- It took a while to learn that. And I realized probably when I hit 30, that's when I started to do all the inner work. When I hit 30, I was opened up about being sexually abused as a kid and all these other traumas I had. I finally started talking about them and expressing them and letting them kind of release through my body. And it was the, those years after the last six years where it's been like, wow, I've been such an, like, jerk, like, not in like a deliberate way, like a subconscious way, an unconscious way, where all I wanted to do was win at all costs. And I wasn't being mean to people necessarily, but I was just like a poor loser with everything in conversations. I was a poor loser in sports and whatever it may be. I was just in relationships. I was a poor loser. Like, if I didn't get it my way, what I thought was right, just a poor loser, right? I wasn't intentionally trying to be mean or anything, but it was just in my body. And it was this, I would say the ego is the second most powerful fuel that drove me to achieve results in the outer world. But it left me feeling so alone and empty in my inner world. Yes. And then at 30, I started to transform, and I'm still transforming every day, but I started to open up about these things and realize, wow, collaboration is actually and lifting others up is the key, not competition and trying to beat everyone.

That's amazing.

And collaboration and lifting others up is like the most powerful fuel over I need to be right all the time and I'm going to prove these people wrong.

Yeah. And isn't that amazing that it's all down to trauma, feeling that trauma once more.

Yeah.

Right. So how and I believe in this year and next year, I believe that consciousness is expanding to a level where these things can't not be seen. It's almost like Our consciousness is bigger, so it's like looking and rooting around in our bodies and okay, like what you just described, like becoming number one to not feel that. I believe that was at one point the collective highest consciousness in the 80s, 90s, right? We didn't look at our deepest, darkest things.

Maybe even right now it is with current politics, who knows.

And so the old movement, and this is kind of what the book's about, is the old way kind of shows, you know, in the 80s, it was this thing to like have nine Lamborghinis and everything was about hype and, you know, get the Ginsu steak. You're like, oh, you know, and everyone wanted to be like the young Donald Trump, you know, that book of selling and all this. Well, and then the secret came and it said, focus on what you do want positivity, right? What I believe is the consciousness is bigger now and instead of only focusing on what you want, I really believe the amount of what you can get is it's based solely on how much you can accept the opposite. So in other words... Accept the opposite of what? So let's say you really want to be rich, it's based on how willing you are to be poor. If you want the ultimate relationship, it's based on how willing you are to be alone. If you can love being alone, you'll cry out your codependency, you'll cry out the old story, and then you create a space for that. But if everyone is ambitiously just trying to date, there are going to be two attachments that are stopping each other from their inner truth so it won't land. It won't last, right? So, and it goes all the way to you want the best life, totally accept death.

Wow.

To have the greatest life in the world, be completely and fully accepting of death. And the more you go, I'm fine with death, the more you feel free, right? It's weird because what we have now is a world of people who are really trying to put a million locks on the doors and protect themselves from a life they're not living.

Right?

Like, I gotta protect, I gotta keep my freedom, I gotta have all the weapons, I gotta have all this stuff. That's nice. Do what you need to do, but are you living it? Because the weirdly, the more you live your life fully, the less fear you have of death.

You're not obsessing over like every lock and booby trap in your house and security systems or whatever. I'm not saying you should have security systems, but yeah.

But what if, ironically, that's what's like, if you What I find is the more you live and you accept your darkness, like your strength is based on how much you accept what you call your darkness, right? So I'm sitting here and I meditate and in the meditation, light and dark show up at the same time. And who am I if I'm looking at both? So I'm sitting here holding space for light and darkness. So I'm now the space that can carry both. Usually we're avoiding our darkness so we just have this capacity, just positivity No negativity. But I'm like, what if we got this? Right? So you're sitting here and the more you accept your darkness, the more people aren't gonna screw with you because they're scared of theirs. The people that we perceive as some of the most dangerous, manipulative, narcissistic people are actually, ironically, horrified of their own darkness. Right? So when you're shining a light and you're fine with all your truth and you're fine with everything, that scares the out of the manipulators. So you start to get divinely protected the more you open your heart. See, most people think, I'm scared I'll get hurt, so they close their hearts off. And ironically, they close their hearts off to the most loving people in the moment right now. But what they actually attract are other people with closed hearts. So a people pleaser's got their heart closed, and they only attract takers.

Wow.

Right? If you're a people pleaser, you're scared, you don't want to hurt someone's feelings, the takers see right through that.

They take everything from you constantly.

'Cause that's the match to what you're being. Wow. So if you open your heart, you're like, I'm scared I'll get hurt. Actually, you're getting hurt 'cause you're not opening it. So life is trying to give us a ton of, but we've never seen what life's like when we're not constantly scared of our own darkness and achieving to avoid it. When you just sit there and love yourself. And I don't mean confess everything to the world. So that means make a million videos and tell the world, Right. It's like, I'm talking to you. Vulnerable every moment, every po- yeah, you don't have to do that.

So you're like doing that and now that's your addiction.

Like, look everybody, I'm- well, you get validated from that. Yeah. I've seen that story too. I'm talking you working through your stuff and the biggest power you have is your own forgiveness, not for any reason other than to free you in that. And then just completely forgiveness of others.

It's so key.

Forgiveness is everything.

Yeah. So many people don't forgive themselves for the longest times.

Well, guilt is a great way to stay the same.

Oh my gosh.

The things you feel guilty about keep you actually in the same grade. It's almost like, let's say you're emotionally in third grade. And then you did something that you feel bad about, so now you feel guilty. Well, guilt keeps you in third grade because it's a way to stay the small story. Forgiveness moves you to fourth grade, so you become someone who would never do the thing anymore.

Right.

Right? So by staying guilty, you're actually staying in the vibration and your own repression of yourself is gonna cause you to lash out at other things and do more of the same because you've put your own prison on yourself that says you can't and then an inside part of you goes, screw you to that. You get what I'm saying?

You keep repeating the pattern. Right. Wow, so how long should we feel guilty for or should we never feel, like if we did something we're like, okay, I reflect on that, I know.

That wasn't the right thing. That's a good point, there can be the narcissistic other side, it's fine that I did that, it's fine that I did that. Yeah, yeah. Right, well, one of the things for me about meditation is it transforms the old story.

It's almost like going to the bathroom every day emotionally.

Yeah, it's nice.

It's releasing those emotional bowels, huh?

Yeah, well and the funny thing is most people, when they meditate, they're scared of what's coming up and that's the equivalent of going to the bathroom for the very first time after 40 years and being scared to do this 'cause you think you're the poop, right? You're like, this stuff's coming out, that's me leaving. No, no, no, you're the butt, you're the space that it's leaving. And you don't have to force it, what I would have to do. In fact, it's exactly the same. All you have to do is sit and wait. And then the first day, if you didn't crap for 40 years, the first day is going to be a nightmare. So when people meditate, it's gonna flow out. Yeah. They cry and cry and they release all this and it's insane. But then eventually it's down to a.

Good hour a day. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But you need that emotional diarrhea for maybe a week, maybe a whole 48 hours or a week, yeah.

Interesting. That's the thing is what I'm trying to teach people is you're the butt, not the poop.

Now we're supposed to be talking more about money. I'm tearing up.

No, I'm just laughing.

You've been talking about money. I'm laughing, yeah. It's awesome. I was actually funny. I was on the, I've been crying a lot this year.

Hell yeah.

Like in this relationship I'm in, I'm just like, she does something, I'm just like, oh my God, I feel so much love 'cause I'm allowing myself to receive it. I'm finally being like, I was in these relationships that I was choosing after my last relationship ended, and it didn't end in a good way. I really woke up. I was like, okay, I've been in so many relationships that have ended horribly. Like something bad has happened almost every ending. There's maybe one relationship, it wasn't that bad, but the rest were bad in the last 15 years. So I go, okay, the common denominator, this is me. Let me reflect on who I've been, what I've done, and why I created this in my life, this pattern. And I decided to look at all the relationships I've been in, what they all had in common. And they had three key things in common. I'm sure they had more, but it came down to three that I was like, oh wow, this is a big aha moment. The first one is I thought that they were extremely beautiful. like I was attracted to them physically, sexually. I was attracted. Second thing, they had some type of gift or talent that I was inspired by. Wow, this is like this amazing gift that they... I get that. The third thing in my perception is they didn't believe they were beautiful and they didn't believe they were talented.

So you could coach them. I could coach them.

And I was like, look at this, you're amazing, you're beautiful, you're so gifted and talented.

I want you to see this and grow. Did you not have that? Not believe it?

She definitely had like, she- Something shut.

Off where you even convinced her of stuff?

She was suppressed for sure because she had my older brother when she was 19 and then just had to start working and left school to be a mom full time, then had three more kids and then we got to pursue her dream or really share her voice.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So one of the things that caused me to coach people was my mom was a very big open-hearted person. Also though, my mom had a cynicism a lot of my life about what I do. I mean, she just loved me for real, not just based on what I accomplished. But I'm like, Mom, look, look how funny this joke is. Or look how, and she'd kind of roll her eyes. So I found myself attracted to cynical women for a while. Yeah. The ones that my ego could redate so I could.

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Overcome my mom's approval.

Wow.

So I'm actually looking for the sabotage. And what I believe your tears are for this relationship are the releasing of the story of who you used to be in relationships. And even the child used to be like, this is a different story. This is a person that isn't necessarily repressing themselves or someone that you need to coach.

No, I don't have to coach with anything. It's just like magic.

Right, so who would you be without the coacher, right? Who would you be without that? And our identity that we create is like I coached my mom, right? Or I, you get what I'm saying?

I know.

So what I believe the tears are, it's both of course a profound appreciation for this moment, but I actually believe almost all of our tears from just working with so many people and seeing this is the actual goodbye to a part of what you thought you used to be.

An old identity.

Right.

Wow.

So you actually go, you know, my dad told me X, Y, Z, so I tried to achieve to get my dad's love. And then you finally meditate enough or you do enough work and you see through that. And then you make a decision that doesn't support that old story. Now the old story is not being seen and catered to as true, so there's no use for it. So it comes out your eyes.

Yeah, yeah.

And every time I work with someone, I go, what would happen if you didn't have that? Like, I worked with someone recently that loves to protest things and goes to the Senate and protests things that they feel are injustice. And I said, and what I felt with her was she's amazing and the highest vibration of her is she's a lover. But in her entire life, she's been the fixer and the fighter, right? She's protected herself from a lot of dangerous things in her life. So she created a false identity, that she's the fighter. But when I meet her, she's this amazing mothering feminine energy that's so sweet. And so she realized it would actually be a higher service to the world and even against the injustice going on for her to go to her loving state. Wow. Because that is freeing her old story, which could free other stories, including the people doing the repressing. Like we could use 10 million Mr. Rogers More than 10 million marchers around the, you know what I'm saying?

Sure.

Like that's what'll heal when we can cry out our stuff. It's crazy. You know, I was saying to you, even though there's a lot of stuff that Ben Shapiro says that's amazing. Facts don't care about your feelings. Facts don't care about your feelings, which has a truth to it. And my new revelation is also feelings don't care about your facts. True. Your feelings inside want to be seen and we are going to have a problem in the world if we don't see our feelings. All anger is repressed feelings, all anger. And it's under the illusion it's something over there. Everything that you think is outside you, bull. It's an unseen inner child. And this feeling's trying to come up and then you try to analyze it or figure it out and bring a bunch of facts in.

Well, your feelings don't care about your facts.

True.

There's a balance probably. Yeah, both are true. Your feelings mainly don't care and don't matter to like certain laws at some point. But they matter to feel them.

They both matter because they matter to.

Feel them right now.

Facts are based on feelings and feelings are based on facts.

Yeah.

Right? They both are needed equally.

That's true. Right?

We gotta be able to cry stuff out.

Absolutely.

We gotta be able to, we're carrying around like the 50s in our bodies.

That's crazy, man.

Right?

Probably way before that, yeah.

So once you cry that out, how much more do you think would come to you? Because you're receptive and not moving from the small story.

So much abundance. It's been crazy, man. Like, yeah, it's been weird. Like, there's a lot of shifts that have been happening.

Yeah.

Since I let go of this story. Now, granted, I'm always a work in progress. There's still gonna be stuff. One of the things I noticed about me is, like, my close friends know this. Like, anytime where I'm not meditating consistently and I'm not being Source and being like, freedom and peace and love. Yes. And I feel someone's taking advantage of me, I react. Yes. I go back to the child who was sexually abused or bullied or made fun of, and I'm like, I need to protect myself. I need to express my dominance, whatever it is, my ego. And then I always regret it. I'm like, God, why was I such an idiot? Why didn't I meditate? Exactly. I'm like, why was I reactive? Like, this is nonsense and this isn't gonna matter in a week or a month or a year, but I was like, holding on to so strongly that someone was attacking me.

Yes.

From my ego or whatever it was.

Because one of the things meditation truly does, and I'm talking about just listening to silence, it doesn't have to be that you focus on your breath or it's just like sitting and listening. All this stuff comes up, but one of the things it does is it causes you to realize who you are is now not the sexual abuse story as horrific as it is, and it's honored and seen and held by you now. is not you.

Exactly.

Right? It's not you, it's an old story and as we sit here and realize that we're here, then that won't be triggered and the more you see your triggers, the more they leave and when they leave, no one can trigger you.

It's true.

Right, because they can only trigger your triggers.

And every time you're triggered, you're saying someone else has power over me, like you said. Every time we react or comment negatively or gossip, we're giving our power away to that thing.

One of the things people do that I think is really funny is when we tell people about what our triggers are to change them, like, yeah, just so you know when you ate that way I was triggered it reminds me of my dad, so if you could not eat that way, that's called narcissism. Like everyone move around my trigger. Crazy. My, I don't want to look at my so I expect everyone to not hit this. That's what narcissism is. Wow. Someone who's scared of their own repression, someone who's scared of their own abuse. So when you open your heart, it's a whole different story. And it's so funny because as this book is about money, it's like you can see how much more abundance would you have, how many different types of jobs or entrepreneurial things would you create from that space. So as much as it's a book about money, it's a book about you, but I believe that's the highest way to money. So there's gonna be people like a book about money, and then you read this, What's this Airy Fairy shit? It's like you will not make money just from a bunch of strategies anymore. Just hearing manipulative tactics and saying, well.

You could make money, but it's not gonna fulfill you the money you're making.

Right. And you're gonna lose it or you're gonna be a prisoner to it. But it's also now not sustainable because we can see through such bull now that the more you sell from manipulation, the only one type of person that can't see that is going to get it, and you're gonna get a bunch of refunds because it wasn't your heart. What's going to make money is authenticity. The universe working through you, doing something that's in contribution to the world, for real. I have a rule that everything I do has to be a win-win-win, and I'll explain that. A win is abundance for me and a fulfillment from doing it. The second win is, are they fulfilled, abundant, and more conscious? And third is the world better because of it. So when I look at a soda company, that's a win-lose-lose. It's a win because you make money, lose because they're rotting their teeth and getting diabetes, and a loss because you're throwing plastic in the ocean. So that paradigm is going to fall because all three wins are inside of you. So if you're a win, lose, lose, you're two-thirds self-hate because it's in you.

Mm-. Wow.

You get what I'm saying?

Yeah, of course.

So win, win, win has to be happening. So it's, does the consciousness of the world expand? It's ironic because things that have been seen as like, airy fairy or snake oil or whatever are actually the most legitimate. Meanwhile, soda and other crap is incredible.

Companies like top 500 companies.

You know, companies here are in the world. Wow, amazing company. Thanks for selling such a legitimate addiction to the world. Tooth rotting, crazy, horrible vibration lowering. Are you kidding me? That's okay. You know what I'm saying?

I get it, man.

That's the cult.

My challenge is I'm like, gosh, I love pizza and ice cream so much. And when I was younger, I was like, it'd be so cool to have a pizza shop and an ice cream store. But I'm like, God, that would just be hurting people. So I need to reinvent what pizza looks like so it's healthy and reinvent.

Ice cream so it's healthier. And it's also possible the reason you like ice cream and pizza, not that it's not awesome, is because you liked it as a kid. Absolutely, it brought me joy. Yeah, when I was a kid we had a place, and we still do in Washington called Taco Time. And it was like a really good, Amazing version of Taco Bell, like, but I used to go there with my mom.

Yeah, so it made you feel a certain way.

So I don't like Taco Time as much as I like connection with my mom.

Oh, interesting.

Right? So when I stopped going to Taco Time, I like cried for some reason. I was like, why? And, but I'm crying my mom out. I'm crying my whole story out.

Yeah, I used to, in Delaware, Ohio, there was like a, like a ice cream stand. I can't remember what it's called, something Depot, but it was, They had like this Smurfs ice cream and my dad and I would always get it after like a T-ball baseball game and always make me feel connected to him.

I get that. And then like I often unconsciously want to do that with my daughter too. Like I want to do the pattern with her. Like I learned music from my parents, right? I'm a musician in certain ways and love, but I still love like Hall and Oates, Huey Lewis, like bands they liked and took me to. Because I love their, I do love the music, but I also love I also really love the connection that I perceive I'm getting. But the more you do the work, the more you see how crazy that is.

It's a story.

You're like, I just want to feel my dad loves me, so I'm gonna play this Huey Lewis album.

Recreate that feeling.

But isn't that interesting? When we start to, once we become aware of that, once we hit the awareness of that, then it becomes insanity to keep doing it. So once you see, wow, this is one of the stuff things meditation brings up. I can see the pattern that's chasing that thing so I can get a good job from my dad, or doesn't wanna be abandoned again by my mom, or doesn't wanna be last in sports.

Or doesn't-- that's-- be laughed at or made fun of, whatever it is.

Right. It's rejected. I'm scared of the trauma I felt, so I'm going to do it again. Well, imagine if the other option is we see and hold a space for the trauma and you now could be the parent that you always wanted. You now could be the parent for the inner child that didn't feel safe in the past. That's what I do. It's like whatever it feels, it goes, I feel unseen. I sit there and go, instead of me going, well, let's get you seen, that's the 80s response.

We tell a joke.

We let people laugh at me and yeah, whatever. I tell the inner child, like imagine you're meditating and it goes, I feel unseen, I feel unloved. And you think it's because of outside, but take off the reason I just feel unseen, I feel unloved. Then you close your eyes and you're saying to it, instead of fixing it or getting it loved, say, you,'re allowed to be unloved in my body. I'm going to be the first place that lets, it's fine if you're unloved in my body. Then you feel this five-year-old you, for real, like dance around your body because it's finally seen because usually when you feel unseen, you chase being seen to fix it and keep not seeing it. It wants to be seen by you.

Wow.

Not the girl, not our parents.

The world, our social media.

It wants to be seen by you. So every time you chase being seen, it's feeling ignored by you. So our job is to become a space to see it. And the second you go, I feel unseen, and it's okay, you can feel unseen on my body. It will move through your body, it'll go chest, over arm, whatever. And the more you go, you're almost almost loving it as it does that, it'll start breaking into pieces and it'll come out your eyes.

In tears. He's saying, not actual little child jumping.

Out of your eyes. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

No, it's not. Yeah, that's so horrifying. You know, this is so fascinating. We're talking this.

This is fun.

I love this stuff.

Yeah.

Because I'm working on, I was mentioning that I've been working on a new book. It's still in the early stages. I'm writing the proposal and fleshing out the ideas. And it's about eliminating self-doubt. Because I believe that self-doubt is a silent killer. of all of our big dreams. And when we can eliminate the self-doubt, we can do what we've been talking about this whole time. We can go chase the art project or start singing or whatever we want to do. We can start fully doing it without the fear of being embarrassed, broke, alone, whatever it may be. And my entire life since I was probably 14 till now, every time I feel fear of something, I get sick and tired of feeling that way after a certain point. Maybe it's a few years, maybe it's a few months, it just gets boring. It's a decade. I'm like, I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired of this feeling of people judging me or people criticizing me about this. And so I go all in on the fear. For instance, when I was a teenager, I was afraid to talk to girls. And so I created a challenge for myself in the summer when I was 16, that every time I felt butterflies when I saw a girl, I was gonna go up to them. and just have a conversation. It was terrifying the first week. But I was like, I'm sick and tired of feeling rejected all the time and feeling like girls are making fun of me and laughing at me all the time or just not having the confidence to go up and talk to someone. And so I did this and by the end of the summer, I was just like so free to talk to anyone because it didn't matter if they rejected me or not. And I had so many good instances of just great conversations with people that I felt bulletproof. I felt invincible by the end of the summer. I did that with salsa dancing, with like singing on stage when I was terrified to sing. public speaking, I did that for a full year of just feeling rejected over and over again. Those feelings in my body until they went away. And I continue to do that in business and relationships and it makes me feel free of the fears of insecurity, of judgment that people have on me.

You know partly why is because you've now created an excitement to the fear so you want it there so it can't be there. The only thing that causes fear is not wanting it there. The only thing that causes fear is you not wanting it to be there. If you love fear, it can't last.

Bring it on.

Because fear is your resistance to yourself.

Wow, that's big.

So it's only the factor. So it's not that you're in fear, it's that we are trying to get rid of it. It's that we're trying to change it. It's that we think it shouldn't be there. But life is so cool that it's trying to get you to learn to love more unconditionally. to even create a capacity to even love that fear, which you have.

Why do we resist fear so much in general?

Because we believe we're the old story and the fear that's showing up is perceivably bigger than the old story, but it's not bigger than what you are. So to the old story, this is bigger. So I actually have a belief even, you know, this is my conclusion, but it's based on what I've seen with trauma with working with a lot of people. When what I believe more and more, my definition, there's no science behind this, there's no whatever, but this is what I'm experiencing. Your experience, yeah. Is that trauma seems to me like something happens that's bigger than you can handle, right? So when you're, let's say you're in first grade, let's say you're literally in first grade, something happens and it's almost like that thing is a 12th grade thing, but you're a first grader. Now, when you're actually in first grade, you understand there's calculus, but you don't you don't get what it is.

You don't start taking a class.

Right, so in the same way, the body goes, I know that's there, but I don't get what it is, so I'm gonna store it somewhere. And we'll learn it when we're in 12th grade. When we're ready. And we'll learn it also emotionally in 12th grade. So you're in first grade, and you got this wound, you're in second grade, third grade, it's not bringing it up, fourth grade, fifth grade, sixth grade, seventh grade, eighth grade. You start learning more lessons from life, you're changing, you're going through different emotions, different relationships, different careers, whatever. You finally get to the 11th grade and it's like, oh, you're ready for this. Now your capacity is open and I'm going to show you this thing. And now that your capacity is so big, we're gonna release it. And when you see the trauma show up in meditations and stuff like that, it's only because it's leaving. See, people see something show up in their meditation and they go, what do I do with this? Well, it's coming up because it's leaving. you don't have to do anything with it. So it's almost like when a dentist is pulling out your old cavity, you're gonna see it because it's leaving your mouth. But imagine if when you saw it and it's leaving, you went, what does this mean? What do I do with this?

You're afraid to let it go, you.

Put it back in. Right. So now you're analyzing it and trying to figure it out, keeps it there. So what if you just let it be there, it shows up, there's your grandpa yelling at you, there's some old story, trauma, whatever, and you just don't do anything. This is what my meditations are. It'll just be like, boom, there's some trauma, there's a thing. Why is it showing up? Because I've accessed a capacity with this moment that's big enough to be able to see it and be able to handle it, and it won't be overwhelming for me. And what fear is trying to do is get you to a bigger capacity of oneness. Fear is trying to take you to more of here, Because fear is only death to your story, right? If someone threatens you and that means you might lose your job, you think who you are is that job. That's why it's scary, right? Oh, the person in my relationship might leave me. I feel fear because I'm under the illusion that who I am is a story and this person feels just like my mom. So I'm under the illusion that I'm going to lose love from my mom during this breakup. But when you actually get your this moment, the less fear you have. Because you're, and you study this moment, you really not only transcend the fear, but your capacity is so big that you can receive bigger, you can move bigger, you can do, the same party that can transcend the fear can now accept bigger ideas and do bigger things because you're not the small story. You're infinite. You and I are equally infinite. Everyone in here, you're infinite. The people watching, you are. I don't care what the story is, and when you come up with Yeah, but that's your marriage to the old story. Right?

So how do we overcome our fears if we feel crippled by our fear?

By loving it, first of all, wanting it to be there, and it's going to transcend in a way that your ego's not used to doing. So the fear comes up, do you have one right now? We could do it if you want.

I'm trying to think. I feel like I've been addressing a lot of my fears in the last seven months. One, getting out of an old relationship. feeling like under attack from opinions of others.

Yes.

Of like the breakup and what happened. And is this true? Is that the gossip of the breakup?

-Huh.

And being like, man, you know, everyone's got an opinion.

Look at everyone giving you their power.

Everyone, right? Oh, they were.

Yeah.

And they're spending so much time and energy.

Yeah.

Thinking and obsessing about something that's not theirs.

You weren't supposed to do what they expected of you.

Exactly.

You're supposed to be within the boundaries of people who have no idea who you are. Exactly. You're not supposed to follow your calling. You're supposed to follow what they say.

Exactly.

Isn't that nuts?

Crazy. Right? Crazy. But when it triggers you. So it triggered me for a little bit because it was just an avalanche of people, right? I was like, whoa, this is okay.

There'S a lot coming out for me. So if someone were to write something now, you find something, some exposé or whatever, in this world of exposés. Right, right. What would you feel right now? I would feel sad. Okay. I'd feel sad that people put that.

Much attention on something that's so far in the past. But what about your unsaid part of you?

Personally? Yeah, 'cause if there's a trigger, that's fine.

Yeah, if I'm being honest with myself, I'd probably be like, God, these people.

Have no clue who I am.

Yes. For a moment. So you feel like, They don't know the truth. They don't know, yeah, I feel like they don't care.

They're just assuming something and they're holding on to that story. So one of the first things that's trying to happen is life is so cool, that is trying to get you to find and be a space for all the unseen parts of you so you can do even more and be even bigger. Because none of what they said actually affects you. It affects whatever lingering old story in your childhood that you're holding onto. So if I just said, okay, some huge article came out, you had some giant whatever scandal 'cause you broke up, whatever. What would you feel? Just the, what would be the words? Unseen, unloved.

I always feel like... Hey, everybody, Ted Danson here to tell you about my podcast with my longtime friend and sometimes co-host Woody Harrelson. It's called Where Everybody Knows yous Name, and we're back for another season. I'm so excited to be joined this season by friends like John Mulaney, David Spade, Sarah Silverman, Ed Helms, and many more. you don't want to miss it. Listen to where everybody knows your name with me, Ted Danson and Woody Harrelson. Sometimes, wherever you get your podcasts. So there's an article made up or just like someone's opinion about whatever. Is that what you're saying? Sure. Yeah.

Like, what was the last.

I feel under attack.

What was the last trigger?

I feel like under attack.

Under attack.

Abused.

Abused.

I'd be like, this person's abusing me.

They don't really know what happened. Isn't that interesting? It's such a different word. Like, I you would feel unseen. You'd feel abused.

I feel abused. Wow. Like someone's trying to take advantage of me.

So if we take off those- I.

Feel used as well. I feel like, man, this person's using me to get attention. My ex was using me for five years in the relationship and she's still using me to gain significance and attention or to build her business or whatever. So use and abuse.

So if we just take off the reasons now and just are stuck with abused, Right? That you just feel in your body abused. Can you, first of all, try this. Take a deep breath, because that reminds you you're here to be a space for abused.

Feel abused?

It's not like I want you to feel abused, but it's more like, okay, so we said the word abused. Now if you take the reason off, like someone wrote it, now you're alone with abused, with the feeling of abused, and that usually shows up like a lump sensation, Or do you feel anything in your body that just like- yeah, it's right here. It's right here in your chest. Excellent. So I want you to be a space for it. There's a part of you. What do you mean be a space? So you right here are holding space like you're a bed for a five-year-old version of you that feels abused. You get what I'm saying? Yeah. So take a deep breath. Retainer. Yeah. So it's almost like you're letting it be there. I don't want you to do anything to try to get rid of it. Hold it there.

Yeah.

Hold it, but don't try to do anything with it. Like imagine it's your five-year-old son.

Inside of me.

Inside of you. Just needing to be seen and not fixed and not changed. You get what I'm saying?

Yeah.

You're the space for this. So we're not trying to get rid of it. We invite it here. It's totally allowed here. Dude, you're so heroic to do this work right now. So, right, right. This boy that feels abused is here. and you're like the dad that's a space and says, your strength is just being okay with it being there, not needing it to go anywhere, not trying to do this to get rid of it. You actually are creating a higher capacity that's both the space, the body, that's all three, the space, the body, and the five-year-old. So first of all, you're loving the abused boy, not trying to fix it. You feel that? What's the sensation feel like now?

I feel like heat.

Heat.

Like my heart is beating stronger and I feel like heat right here.

So take a deep breath again, because that centers you to here. And this is deep. I'm offering everyone watching to do this with themselves, because you just go, I feel unseen, whether it's by your spouse or whatever, unseen, unloved. Now you'll notice the more you want it there, it might move around. Do you get what I'm saying? If you want the heat there, you'll notice that what usually you do, our habit is to kind of fix the heat, overcome the heat, right?

Disperse the heat or something.

Yeah, yeah. But instead, you are even stronger than the heat. So you're the space for the heat. So what do you feel now?

I feel like it relaxed me a little bit.

It relaxed. Did it go into your stomach too?

It just feels like less.

It feels like less.

Yeah, it feels less.

Excellent. Weirdly, as you accept it, it starts to kind of go away because you're creating a deeper capacity by connecting to the moment to be there for it. So I'll keep checking in, what do you feel now? 'Cause it kind of does different things. It kind of moves into your stomach.

I feel like it's going down a little bit.

Yeah. The reason I said that was I'm connecting with you heart to heart and I felt it go into my stomach. That's why I asked. is like I felt my stomach feel it. Because when we're undone from our stories, we can actually feel each other heart to heart. So I'm holding space and capacity for the abused boy too. And we're just collectively like two men.

Regular holding a little inner child inside of us. Yeah.

So you're creating the space because the articles or whatever was written was not you feeling unseen by them. It's you feeling unseen by you. and now you are seeing you. And this vulnerability right now, and imagine you've never ever got to see what you're able to create and what you're able to do for the world after this child's scene. Because once this is fully seen and a part of you and accepted, what you're going to do will be the first time you did it without the resistance to a part of yourself. You've never seen what that's like. You've never seen you without this there. So it's almost like a lingering thing that was just kind of dangling in the side. It's like, okay, that's what triggers are for. To show us where we don't love ourselves. Right, God, it's so true.

Right?

So every time I work with someone, I get their trigger, I'm like, let's go there. Let's take off the reason. 'Cause some things don't trigger. Doesn't matter, yeah, yeah. How could someone else do something? Like if someone said you're a purple monster, that wouldn't trigger you. You're just like, they're nuts, right? So some things, if they trigger you, that's not a sign about them. That's a sign that you didn't love something about yourself. So now who are you? So what do you feel right now? And the deep breaths kind of remind you you're here so you don't get caught in the story. You're just the dad for this five-year-old child.

Yeah, I just feel like it keeps kind of like going down and lessening.

Lessening.

Yeah.

And do you feel a teeny bit more here or stronger or less triggered or?

Yeah, I do. I feel more peace.

Yeah, because it needed to be seen. This is that we can do in five minutes that we carry around with us our whole lives. Right? So now you're sitting here feeling relaxed and you're okay with a part of you that feels abused again that you had not ever felt that level.

So it's not trying to, Disregard the feeling. It's first accepting it, creating being the space for the feeling, holding the feeling.

Yeah.

I guess gently holding it. Don't clench it, but hold it gently. Yeah. And allow it to move where it's gonna move and then move on. Is that the next-- Check this out.

The victim tries to run from the feeling. Maybe addicts to it, right? It's getting connect, like I'm gonna have an addiction to block me from smoking, drinking, whatever. The achiever over overcomes the feeling while it's still unseen.

Right, and it's always there. You're just never looking at it. Yes. You go and create and achieve and make money and accomplishments. That was my life.

Yes, it comes up and you go, that's my driver.

Yeah, it was.

Right? So that's nice. That's a better one than victim. But it's still an unseen kid. Now imagine if that kid was a neighbor's kid coming up to you and saying, I feel abused. Would you go, well, we better achieve Would you go, well, we're gonna overcome this. Let's write a new, let's create a new book. Let's whatever. You'd go, Come here, let me give you a hug. I hear that you feel abused. Let me hug you. Let me hear you. That's what it needs. Not, let's accomplish a new, let's just be with it. And then what happens? Once that's now accepted in a part of you, as you said, it goes away. It goes away. Sometimes it'll go away through crying, sometimes it goes away through diarrhea, it goes away through, because when you read- Throwing up, whatever, yeah. Yeah, a little less fight or flight of your body. So the colon's not holding as tight, constantly at war, not wanting to be abused again in 2019, again when you were five, craziness. This is the one thing that if we started doing this, there would be so much change in the world. There would be, like, there would be so much shifting because all lashing out, all civil war, all anger, all Democrat versus Republican, all side, gun violence is all boom.

I know.

Abused, not seen. And then you become intellectual, and then you become strategy. Yeah. And there's no source in you.

No vulnerability. It's one of the reasons why after doing this work on myself six years ago and constantly doing the work, I realized like I had so much more freedom than ever before. I couldn't sleep. It took me about an hour at least minimum to go to bed until I hit 30 years old. Wow. Almost like all through my childhood, teens, 20s, like I would just be up thinking and like, yeah. Anxious, stressed, like, ah, you know, I might be enough, whatever it is.

Yeah. Strategy, strategy, strategy. Well, and sleep's a example of something that you can't achieve. Like in fact, achievement gets in the way. I'm going to sleep tonight. It's never gonna work. So how do you finally get sleep? Not need sleep. Not need it to happen. Not forcing it.

Surrendering.

Right? So what if sleep is telling you, this is how the world works. Don't achieve your way through. Be in surrender and watch how life gives you what you want. Because the more people try to achieve sleep, the more they don't sleep.

That's right.

And the more you're in surrender and actually focus, like everyone at our meditate, we do these meditation retreats. Everyone at our meditation retreat, we have like amazing sleep because you have- It's walked out, yeah. It's four or five hours, you know, we do all this content, meditate, we find all these inner kids and cry them out. We're listening to silence, no phones. I mean, they put their phones in an envelope, they have the phone, but they don't open it. Then they just Go out, you have no internet, you just go to sleep and everyone is happier and happier.

Connected.

By day four or five, everyone's switching careers.

Wow. Everyone's getting married or getting divorced. Totally. So like, I'm either all in or I'm out.

Or, you know what I see a lot of is people that at first, they get to day two and realize that relationship doesn't align. They keep going day three, day four, and then the relationship suddenly changes to them. Like there's a lot of people that they get to day two, you know, my husband's not for me, whatever. But then they get more to an acceptance and then they get to day six, turn on their phones and I'm not kidding, their husband wrote them like, hey, I threw out our TV, I'm ready to change my life. And like it's almost like a magical match to we've never seen life without this this unseen child completely stuck in us. We have no idea what life is. We've all been in this giant, don't beat me again, Dad, life.

Right, right. Don't judge me again. Don't scold me again.

We're missing out on life. Now, people goes, that's great, but how do you make money? If you are fully on the highest vibration, Do you understand how much more valuable you are than money? And how much more, remember Buddhist monks, there's millionaire achievers that go to Buddhist monks all the time. The reverse never happens. There's no Buddhist monks going, how do I get the money?

I need to make millions.

Yeah. Why is that? Because the highest thing we have, the number one asset we have is our connection to ourself. Then most of us think it's money. So we make that the highest vibration, but it's not.

Inner peace.

It's inner peace. It's this moment and you have that available. And we over, you know, the best things in life are free is a very cliche sentence, but it's true. And that's true. But also we only pay attention to what we invest in financially. So we overlook meditating here. But if we could pay to meditate, we'd all of a sudden do it. So we have to understand that what is free for real will bring in everything else that you want. Yeah, I have a rule too with money that you might think is cool. This is a thing that I want to offer people. If you're trying to figure out how to create a space for money, I offer people to think about how they think about money. Think about how unconsciously you think about it. You're never enough, you're the root of all evil, whatever. Now picture that you're money on a date with you. And if you're on a date with a person who says, you,'re never enough, you're the root of all evil, you'd never want to be there. Right? Well, money doesn't wanna be in the vibrations of judging it.

You reject that person, so you're rejecting money.

Right.

You think that, yeah.

Yeah, I'm going to, how else do we say, I'm gonna use you to get someone to like me. I'm going to, this is how money is seen. So how could money show up if that's how you see it? Because you wouldn't stay with someone on a date that said, you,'re never enough. You're the root of all evil? It's like, okay. So how would you like to be seen on a date? You'd like to be seen as I love you no matter what, no matter if you're small or big, if you're off or on, if you're feeling like, I love you all the way. And if you can look at your debt or have $1 in the bank and go, I love you. Now you're creating a vibrational space for it to show up because you're safe, because your focus isn't on money and how it needs to change. You're much better off because you're on how you're going to change. And when you start changing like we just did and looking at these things and not needing to overcome as much as loving it, now you're focused on the thing that actually creates the money. Remember, every dollar you've ever made came from you. So don't get excited about money, get excited about you.

Mmm.

Right?

Zing.

Like, if I went on a hike with you, we get lost in the woods, I round a corner, I'm not with you and we find a waterfall. I find it you don't see it. I fill a cup up with water and I come back and I say to you, Dude, a cup of water. What am I not showing you? I'm showing you the small thing.

Yeah, not the waterfall.

Not where it came from.

The source.

The source of the water is the much more important thing. So none of us look at the source of where our money came from. We look at the money. So you're sitting here dwelling, not you, but people that were dwelling on the cup of water.

Yeah. Not us being the source of creating more.

Every dollar you've ever made came from you. Get excited about you. Start the focus on what you are, not what money will give you.

And your energy is going to attract or repel more wealth. A lot of, you know, a mentor of mine said, I was at a salsa club learning how to salsa dance. terrified out of my mind and I saw a guy who was amazing, who was a public speaker. He actually got me into public speaking and he said, the world makes room for passionate people. I think money is attracted to passionate people as well. Because people are passionate about life, they bring in energy, they bring a richness of fullness, a richness and they attract riches, whether it be through the community or the art they're creating or the business they're creating. And you're going to start to attract.

Especially in this time, because I know there's people watching this go, well, what do you say about all the greedy billionaires and blah, blah, blah? And what I say is that's the old consciousness. In fact, we see through it and it's starting to crumble. So the old way of doing things selfish was a conscious shift because I believe in the 50s everyone was just like a factory worker working for... And then it was like this breakaway where an entrepreneurial boom happened. so taking your focus off of the old story and moving into what you are and learning how your thinking changes things was the highest consciousness we understood at the time. So at that time, that created this old consciousness of your focus, you know, changes it. So you think positive, whatever, and that created it. And then we keep going and take a good thing too far, and then all of a sudden it's this billionaire thing. You can feel the most controlling mindsets crumbling. You can feel the suicides from the people that have made lots of money but see that it's not the answer. You can feel the people that are controlling other people. All the control, as the control fell in you during this interview, as you said goodbye to the old story and kind of loved it, all control in the world is starting to fall. And the old structures aren't working. and what will work in the new century, in the new future, is the birth of this consciousness, this consciousness following your heart. You will not be able to make money just from massive achievement. It won't work. I'm telling you, it's going to be we see through it. The consciousness sees through it. It's too small. When there's going to be a major influx of Martin Luther King's Mr. Rogers, Oprahs, Wayne Dyer's, it's coming. Because we're so repressed that our hearts are going to springboard like the Renaissance and there's going to be, you know what I'm saying?

That's true. You mentioned this a couple of times and it reminded me of another mentor of mine, Chris Hawker. I was working as an intern for him for about six months when I was on my sister's couch, broke, no money, my dad had just gotten into an accident, a car accident that left him in a coma for three months. And he was kind of my safety net. He was my, you know, Financial stability, where he would support me financially on things. And he always said, you know, when you're done, like, living your dream and chasing your football career, whatever it is, you would always come work for me.

Wow.

He had an insurance company and life insurance, and I did the whole, like, insurance internship and did the testing, and I failed three times on like getting my whatever it is like the series something whatever the life insurance test that I had to pass so I could sell life insurance. I should have stopped after I failed the first time because I just knew it wasn't for me. But I did it so I could have this backup plan.

Wow.

And so when my dad got in his accident, he had to sell his company to his partner because he was no longer able to work anymore. And I didn't have the financial stability like I I had before. So I was sleeping on my sister's couch for a year and a half, and I was working as an intern for about six months with someone that I was learning a lot from. And I remember at one point being like, man, I just really want some money. I feel like I've been working hard for a few years. Like, I really could use some money. I'm not paying any rent money on my sister's. I feel like a loser because I can't contribute to her. I can't even get my own apartment. I'm just a loser. I was 24 at the time. I was like, Man, I'm just a loser of a guy. And he said something to me that you said. He said, Money comes to you when you're ready for it. And I was like, I feel really ready.

You know, I could really use the money right now.

And he goes, I didn't say desperate. Exactly. We didn't say that. But he was like, It's going to come to you when you're ready for it. And when it starts to come, it's going to make sense. I was like, Gosh, I just want it though. I just want it right now. and it's funny because maybe a year later, it started to come. And then it started to really come pretty quickly, like six months to a year after that. And I remember reflecting a year and a half prior, I was like, man, I wasn't ready for this. Like, if this would have came two years prior, I would have blown it. I would have been scared of it. I wouldn't have been prepared for it. Like, I would have been so freaked out by the numbers in my bank account, I would have sabotaged it probably. And so I really feel like it comes to you when you are prepared and ready, and sometimes it's not when you want it to be.

And when people say, how do you get prepared and ready?

That's the key.

So how do you get prepared and ready? So for me, meditation gets me to understand that I'm the abundance, not money. And the second you understand that you're the abundance, and I mean, understand it in your nervous system. I mean, don't just hear that sentence while you're still dying for it in your body. Really be in the alignment of understanding that I'm the abundance. Wayne Dyer said beautifully, there's a thing that everyone thought, you don't attract that you attract what you want. And Wenddyer said, you don't attract what you want, you attract what you are, what you're in vibration of. So if you want abundance, you need to get to a place where you understand your abundance and everything comes into your life the second you finally don't want it. It's not don't want it like avoiding.

You don't need it.

Not desperate, yeah. The second you stop looking for it, you don't even remember you wanted it. that's because you have to access the fulfillment of the connection to yourself first. And then weirdly, it's going to create, first of all, so many creative things, but you're gonna just start, first of all, you're so aware that you see things differently. Think of just that when someone's in their head, they're walking down the street on their phone worrying, you could pass a $100 bill and not even see it. But when you're not in your head, you suddenly start to see you see all these dots connecting and everything meaning something different. And you see every moment as meaningful. Like last night I was waiting to go into a restaurant. One guy recognized me and said hi and we created a friendship because he's also a musician, that's cool. And then this four-year-old girl comes in and just sees me and starts dancing in front of me and showing me her toys. And I just had, that moment was so much cooler than if I was looking through wondering, you know, what is going on in politics Yeah. That was fulfilling, that moment. And because that's fulfilling, and then on my way to the table, each step is fulfilling. Yeah. Now this is more fulfilling than anything I perceive could come to me to make me happy. Once you actually have practiced understanding that this moment is more important than anything you think you want, now you are abundance, not money. And once you're abundance, it's impossible for it to not come. You're just gonna start feeling safe to everybody. They're going to want to hire you. You're going to get bizarre offers. They'll just say, Can you help me through something? Can you create this thing? You'll get an alignment with your creative gifts more than your fix it gifts to make money. You'll be in this higher thing. You'll be worth more. Better jobs will start asking you. You'll start to actually feel heavy when million dollar offers are coming in because you're like, Even that I don't want. And then it just, every time I say no to something, even if it's a huge thing, the bigger thing comes up. It's like life's How about this? How about this? And then the only question I ask is, does this expand me or contract me?

Ooh, yeah, that's good.

Right? If it expands me, then I say yes, and I can feel that within two seconds. If I get to a pros and cons list, I'm already in contracting. Do you get what I'm saying?

Wow.

So a way that I always give an example is if you've ever had lunch, you ever have lunch plans with someone, and then you hope that they cancel.

Yeah.

Okay, that's your highest saying cancel.

Wow.

But you're used to living a notch below it, so you wait for them to do it. So that's what I'm talking about is the highest, what expands me. So it expands, you know what expands me a lot? Is saying no to a lot of things. Isn't that so powerful? Yeah.

Saying no, like- God. -One of the hardest things to learn how to do, but then it's one.

Of the most freeing things when you're in that space. Yeah. Because there's times where you might think my highest is to go out and get laid or party, but it's actually like, Really, sometimes my highest is to go to bed early. Really, my highest, it's not our highest to do what we're doing. Is it your highest to go on Facebook 100 times a day?

No.

No, but we still do it. So we live second highest and we miss out on the universe. So for me, it expands me to be in alignment with the universe in that moment.

How important is developing skills and value? There's one thing of being abundance and being acceptance and all these things, but there's another thing of like, okay, well the person still doesn't have any skills that are valuable for someone else to give them money.

So, you know what I mean? Crazy answer here? Yeah. That's a belief that they need the skills. So let me explain that. So let's first of all talk about value. Okay. Value is perceived, right? Sure, and most people think value is what they're worth is based on what's in the bank, right? You can say that person's got a net worth of 20 million, whatever.

Cool.

That's nice. But there's some people that could lose that money and remake it again in 10 minutes. Like Tina Turner, if her bank account got robbed tomorrow, could just go on tour and fill it again. Then there's some people who inherited it and won or won the lottery. And if that went away, they're still not valuable at that moment at least. So what's the cause of value? Is it how much money you have or is it what's under it? And what you understand is under it. The factor of value is do you understand how valuable you are? Right? So.

How do you understand how valuable you are?

By creating the evidence of it, whether it's through leaps, whether it's so for me, when I started saying no to really tempting things, it would be really hard that moment. Like it'd be really hard. I remember when I was like, no dating for six months. And then like the Swedish bikini teams, like even us.

And you're like, no. That's a joke.

I didn't return down this one. But when you start saying no, it might be hell in that moment, but the next day you wake up and you're like, now even I'm someone that can say no to that. Like now I'm elevating myself above that temptation. So if I'm someone who can say no to that, you feel the force in that? So that's one thing. So there's a lot of skills, I believe, that we might need, but if they aren't your highest to do them, they're not a 10. And if they're not a 10, that affects all of what you do. My friend Glenn Morshower says, if you pee in part of the pool, you pee in all the pool. So my company, my job in my company is to do this, is to go on stage, is to coach people, is to be the space to co-write the book, to make the movie. I don't do the accounting, right? I have no idea how to do the accounting. I don't give a shit about the accounting, right? I don't do the wardrobe, I don't do any of that. But there are people who it is their 10 to do that. So I delegate that because if I did this thing that's a three energetically, then I'm gonna average and bring that onto the stage. My energy will be more depleted because I'm doing things in my life that are like that. Same thing, if you're out of alignment in whatever area, you're bringing that into all of it.

Yeah.

You get what I'm saying?

So true.

So that's my answer to the skills thing because there's stuff that we're just natural at. And most of us disqualify what we're naturally good at because it hasn't been done before. Right? They go, why would anyone want Just stay with it. Because that thing you have is new. That thing you have is calling to you. And it might not make sense now. But so many people I've worked with are like, well, one thing I'm passionate about is this, but I can't see it. Stop the second part. The yeah, but it's the old story. This thing you just said feels good to my body. Doesn't it feel, well, yeah, but no one will make money. No, you're using the past story. Literally what this is, what we are. What we are is the universe trying to change the planet through you. The universe is trying to change itself to a higher consciousness through you. That's what's happening when we receive on a higher level. It's like higher level ideas come through. So when you meditate or whatever, you have an insight that's higher. That insight, you go, it's exciting, but you can't make sense It doesn't, you can't wrap your mind around it. Follow it. You're not supposed to wrap your mind around it. One thing people say is, I can't wrap my mind around it. You're not here to shove the infinite vastness of what you are into your teeny mind.

Right.

You're here to acclimate your mind to the vastness of what you are.

Zing.

That's the difference. You know, there's so many quotes that people say to insult people that live in their hearts. Like, this person went off the deep end. The implication is the shallow end is better. This person went over their head. Yeah, I'm using my whole body. Right. Right.

Not staying in my head.

Are you out of your mind? You better believe it, I'm in my heart.

Exactly.

It's easier done than said. How about it's too big for your britches? You're too big for your britches. How about we change pants and adjust to me versus me shoving myself in my old britches? What are we, in our 20s? These old quotes. that are bullsh*t. Every insulting quote, if you just reverse it, it's so funny how dumb it looks. Oh, dude, you're out of your mind. You're right, you're in your head. It's like you're thinking small. You better be out of your mind. I love to go over my head so I have to use my body. Because just my small mind can't grasp these concepts we're talking about. But my body knows it. If you listen to this, you have to be listening from your body. You cannot listen from the small story.

That will make sense.

In fact, this is very offensive to the small story, right? How dare he? I'm in this limitation and then and most of us instead of fighting for our freedom fight for our limitation. Gosh.

Because that's a safe space, right? It's safer being limited.

Totally. Well, ironically it's not. It's actually the most dangerous place.

But it seems safer. Yeah, but it's more comfortable in that place, yeah.

Yeah, but I mean what we call a safe space could be an abusive relationship. It could be, it's just you're used to it. So because you didn't die, you go, that's safety. And everything that I've never seen before, I don't know that I won't die, so my body's scared of it. But the truth is, usually what the body's got is way better. And it will change your consciousness from here to here. And then you'll get this new calling once you're here to here. And you start moving up versus forward motivationally. start moving in this different way.

Levitating.

Yeah.

Wow.

What do you think of this?

I love this, man.

Is this crazy?

We've gone for like probably a couple hours and I'm not even keeping track of time. I know. So infatuated by this.

And this is such a calling for me and I'm so in a belief that we could create really rapid change immediately. If we would start seeing our feelings, follow the vibrational callings versus what you you think you have to do based on the small story. The amount of change on this planet that can happen in like a week is so nuts. It moves exponentially. So when you're looking ahead and going, what's gonna happen next year? You're not including all of this we're talking about. And you don't know how many possibilities are gonna birth themselves really quickly. And how, if you're sitting there going, how am I gonna pay rent in two months? You're backwards. In two months, do you know how much you can do?

Right.

From this place? Versus from the small stories vision of what it can see, right? It's crazy. I went nuts on this one. I hope you like it.

I love it, man. This is great. Your book is out, the Illusion of Money, why Chasing Money is Stopping youg from Receiving it. We really didn't, we probably spent 10% of the time talking about money and 90% of the time talking about the work it takes to actually start receiving it.

Yes, because that's-- It's everything. That's the factor.

That is the stuff.

And by the way, we have a thing right now where if you order the book on anything and you put, you go to our website, I have a movie.

What's the website?

My website's kylecease.com or also evolvingoutloud.com, but right now we have a movie that we've made and it's about this and I'm here to birth a new consciousness and we all are.

And the movie's free if they buy the book.

If they get the book, you can go to, you can literally go on, Barnes & Noble or Amazon, get the book, grab the order number, go to my website, put the order number in, and right now you'll have the movie, like right now.

The movie's all about, I saw the trailer for it, I'm gonna watch it tonight, but it's a lot of the case studies of people who have these stories, the stories that they've been telling themselves for years they grew up in. And the feelings attached to these stories and what's keeping people down from abundance of money, what I'm understanding.

Yeah. So there's several different stories, including my story in there, and a lot of my talking and gorgeous, beautiful nature shots and a reminder of what's really real. And these people that have these stories that did what they thought they needed to do to make money, right? I'd better become a lawyer because I don't want to experience what my mom experienced in her childhood and that makes money. So like there's a person that has that story, there's another person who had a good job at, you know, on Wall Street, another person had a good job Department of Water and Power making money. And then they did this thing where they like, the girl, this woman, Sharon, she was at the law firm and not happy, but she started eating really healthy and felt so good that she started getting really high vibrational, feeling good, raw vegan type food. So she started making it for everyone in the firm and then they all felt good. And it started being so fun for her that she couldn't wait to get home to go do that. so she realized that's her passion. And now she's more abundant, but every second she's in, she talks like I do.

Right.

Where it's like, I'm so excited about this. This is how we want to live. We can all live like happy.

Alive, not dead.

Alive. You don't have to be yesterday ever again. You can start now. Just close your eyes and meditate for a couple hours. It'll clear that sh*t out. I mean, you don't have to live in a stressful, anxious, story. It's a story. You're making your story your God versus God your God. Versus the universe versus the moment.

Well, I want to acknowledge you for a moment because you spent 22 years as a comedian pursuing a dream, living the dream that you wanted to live. And then you decided that that wasn't as fulfilling anymore for you. And instead of saying, well, I've put 22 years of my life into this. Is this my identity? I need to stick it out because look at all the work I've done. Look at the credibility I have. Now look at the success. I can't just stop and go do something else. You did. You transitioned into something else and used that 22 years of skills into something else to help people with your events, with your meditation retreats, with your books. And then you've transitioned even more into another topic of money, which some people might be like, you,'re a comedian. Why are you talking about money?

Yes.

But I think you have a lot of wisdom around this from your experience.

In the comedy too, that creates comedy.

Exactly. Exactly. So I acknowledge you for constantly reinventing yourself, pursuing ideas, pursuing challenges that people might say, stay in your lane. Yeah. Go be the funny guy. I love how that's my lane.

Like what I did is you're like, you know, I'll say that, it's funny you say that one thing that you pointed out is this thing, well, if you've done it for a long time, I hear that so much. Like, I've paid this much so far to go to this school, even though it's not my passion anymore, I should keep going. Okay, let me ask you this. Let's say you pay for a plane ticket to go from here to France, and in one hour it starts going down and you have a parachute available. Should you say I paid for the whole flight? And stay on the plane?

Yeah, no, you should jump out.

You need to get out of the plane. And our old story is often a plane going down, and one of the reasons we stress is we're attached to the old old story, your story is trying to die every day. And if you understood you're the moment, then you can be a space for the old story to be pulled from you. If the old story is what you think you are, you're gonna go down with it. Now, I have a theory that's really crazy or there's a way that I see this. In a lot of cases, when a doctor tells someone, you have six months to live, I believe that's your old story in a lot of cases. Because sometimes they're saying, if you eat different, if you, you know, but then you go, well, who I am is someone who eats meat. So, no.

I'm addicted to sugar.

Yeah, so you will go down with the story because you're saying that, but that's an opportunity to meet a new story. And a lot of times our old stories are the sickness, the pain, all of that.

That's true.

Right? So if you have someone tell you something like that, try a new way of eating, try a new way of living, live And it's ironic because a lot of times when people hear that, now they got nothing to lose, so they live fully. We see the greatest art of them. Free. They're free, they cry, they release. And there's many stories where that prognosis was wrong and they lived a lot longer.

Yeah, they heal. They heal themselves.

They heal. So just so you know, the only reason we stress is because we don't embrace death. And everyday parts of our stories are trying to die. I mean, our skin cells are doing this all day, right? Could you imagine if you thought you were yesterday's skin cells, so you're like, packing it on your face. So, death is part of life and the more you embrace death, the more life you get. Because a ton of your old story is trying to die.

Yeah, that's true.

And if you just chill and let it, it's just like, and the old relationship might be trying to die, and the old story of who you were with your mother is trying to die, and the old job is trying to die. If we aren't holding on, there's no tree that like grabs its leaves in the fall and like, don't, This is me, you know? Right. There's no room for new leaves. That's right. You couldn't make new leaves.

New fruit.

New apples. Yeah.

That's it.

Crazy, right?

Well, two years ago you were on the show and I asked you this question about the three truths. And I don't know if you remember them. I don't remember them, but I'm assuming something new will come from you. Possibly. Because your old two years ago is dead and now you're a new person.

Totally. So you might have some new insights. Even my weight is different.

You're much thinner.

I've lost like 50 pounds. I know you look amazing, man. Yeah, and it's from this, it was not as much changing diet as much as it's the old stories trying to die. And the byproduct of letting it die was I didn't need to eat to feel connection to my mom. So once that died, I didn't have the addiction to food because it was an addiction to mom, you know, in connection.

Yeah.

Or the questions.

So imagine this called the Three Truths. So imagine it's your last last day on Earth. Okay. In the physical space.

Okay.

And it's...

I do every day.

Right, there you go. But imagine it's as many years away as you want it to be. Cool. You're 100, whatever.

Cool.

162. 162 and it's the last day and you've finally got to switch off the lights in your physical space and you move on to some other space. Right. And you've created everything you want to create. You've reinvented yourself every few years, written all the books, movies, whatever you want.

To do, you've done it.

But you've got to take it all with you. All the content you've created, all the art and bodies of work, it's got to go with you. So no one has access to your work anymore.

Oh, okay.

But you have a piece of paper and a pen, or you have a stone that you get to chisel in three things you know to be true about all the lessons of your life that you would want to leave behind for us.

Okay.

As these lessons, these principles to live by, what would you say are three truths.

You're enough right now. No question. When you let go of something, you're only stressed because your mind can measure what you will lose. It can't see what you'll gain.

I like that one a lot.

And the feeling is never wrong. The feeling is never wrong.

Was it say the second one again so I can write it down?

When you. When you. letting go of something, the only reason you're stressing is your mind can measure what you will lose, but it can't see what you will gain. That's actually something my friend Diego said to me when we were working together. He actually said that sentence and I was like, should I let go of my Facebook? And he said that. I didn't let go of my Facebook at that time, but I thought that was profound and let go of a ton of other things. I now this week actually let go of my Twitter. I let someone else run my Twitter.

How freeing is it?

It's like sh*t's getting magic. It was like Sunday and today is what, Thursday? I've been in heaven because it also weirdly made me not interested in the news and it made me not interested in anything going like it stopped my Facebook and Instagram too. It was just like, wow. There's so much liberation and not check, like I'm used to scroll on Twitter and do this thing and what am I, I don't care. Yeah. Well, we aren't supposed to know everything else going on.

It's a lot of information.

It's a lot of suitcases we don't need.

Right. You know?

Oh, okay. That happened there and this is happening in this country and this politician. What am I doing? I'm not doing anything with the information.

Just holding on to it.

Yeah.

Yeah. Keeping in your mind as opposed to having space to create or love or be.

And how much creativity and income are we not able to bring because 90% of our day is filled with just facts of nothing. Who gives a s***?

It's true. Right?

Like, I'm sorry, but that happened. But in the old days, we weren't all informed of every area in the world. And that probably, by the way, the informing of everybody is repressing us so much as creating more of the problem in the first place. Everyone's full of suitcases, so they're mad. And then they're lashing out on each other, but just connect to you. It's so much cooler.

So much cooler. The illusion of money, why chasing money is stopping you from receiving it. This is gonna be a game changer. Make sure you pick up a few copies, check out the documentary. I really believe that when you stop chasing anything and you accept yourself, like you said in number one, that's when everything starts chasing you.

Yes.

And you can start receiving it.

Yes.

Receiving love, receiving health, receiving happiness, joy, financial freedom, all these things.

And one thing people say to me is, so sit and do nothing. And one unconscious belief is sitting on the couch, not watching TV, just sitting, listening to silence is doing nothing. It's finally doing something. Like you skirting around at a job you don't like is doing nothing until we're now connected to what we are, right? to me, to sit for a while and listen for a couple hours, a few hours, and don't interrupt it. Don't do this in the middle of it. Go a couple hours. You're not gonna believe what starts happening. You go 100 days at a couple hours a day, you're free. You're free, you're abundant. It's different. It's different. You start cleaning out the crap in the attic literally and figuratively.

Yeah, the emotional attic and the physical attic. Yeah.

Yeah. For people, this book is cheaper. It's $19.95 and it will pay for itself over and over and over and over again. And it comes with the movie too. So please, please, please get it. And I'm doing your summit today. I'm excited, man.

It's gonna be amazing.

I can't wait, brother.

September 6th and 7th, Kyle will be there one of those days. So make sure you're there. This is coming out probably that week, so. It is. Get your last minute ticket, come see Kyle, get a book there, get it signed by Kyle.

First copy is signed.

It's the first copy. And it'll be a nice hardback. There you go. It's the truth. It's all good. It's all good. Kyle, you're the man. I love this. We got to do more of this stuff together. It's been two years since you were on, so we got to come back on for the next book about health. Yeah. Your next one's gonna be about losing the physical weight, the illusion of health. I love it, man.

The final question for you is, what's your definition of greatness? Now. Just the now.

Just the moment.

I love it, man. It's the greatest thing ever. You're the man, Kyle.

I love you, brother. There you have it, my friends. I hope you learned how to attract wealth and believe in your worth in a strong, powerful way today. Lao Tzu said, Because one believes in oneself, one doesn't try to convince others. Because one is content with oneself, one doesn't need others' approval. Because one accepts oneself, the whole world accepts him or her. you've got to learn to start accepting where you are, who you are, and where you're at in your life. The more you start to accept and be okay with things with where you are, let go of the past, move on from those things that are holding you back, then you can start to move forward and really progress in your life. You can start to master new skills. You can start to appreciate those things that come into your life. And you'll start to attract what you want more. You'll start to attract the relationship, the wealth, the money, the time, all those things will come when you soon start to accept who you are. It seems like a challenge in the messiness, but it's a simple concept. And when you fully start to surrender to that, everything starts to flow to you as opposed to trying to force things so much. Trust me, I remember this and every new level that I try to reach, when I try to force things, It doesn't come as easily, but when I accept who I am and I'm okay without the thing, that's when it starts to come to me. So this is powerful, guys. I hope you enjoyed this one. If you did, be a champion, be a hero in someone's life. Send them the text of this episode from Apple Podcasts or Spotify and just text one friend. Just send one friend who you think could be, use this information to help them earn more. to help them have more confidence, to know they're worth more, attract more wealth, text one friend, put it in a WhatsApp group app and get feedback from people. Say, Hey, what did you guys think about this episode? Please leave us a review. Go to Apple Podcasts right now. The more you leave a review, I don't care if you leave a one star or five star review, just leave a review and share your comment. I can't reply to it there. I can't delete it. So whatever you want to say, you can say it. I just want to see your feedback and see how we can continue to improve and add more value to your life. So again, go to Apple Podcast, leave a review, leave a rating. I'd love to hear your feedback. We share this with our community. We share this with our internal team, and it helps us spread the message of greatness even more every time you review. And we've got Summit of Greatness two weeks away. Let's go. This is going to be an incredible experience. Again, almost 2,000 people from around the world flying in for this powerful experience. Kyle C. will be there. You can come, you can get his book, you can get it signed by him, and it's going to be an amazing experience. So make sure to come, check it out. You're going to have Friends for Life. Don't wait anymore. If you're saying, I'll wait till next year, I'll wait till I'm ready, I'll wait till I get the finances together, I'll wait till I can get the time off. Make it happen now. Life is now and now is the time to start stepping into who you want to become. So go to summitofgreatness.com, check out what we have going on. We've got some other surprises that aren't announced there. Check it out right now and I'll see you in Columbus, Ohio at the Summit of Greatness. I love you guys so very much. I hope you enjoyed this interview and this episode. I hope you enjoyed this content. Three times a week we bring you greatness. to your headphones, to your computer, to your phone, wherever you're at listening in the world, we bring it to you. We're also over on YouTube. So go subscribe to our channel, Lewis Howes over on YouTube. Follow me on social media. I'm also on TikTok now. You can go to @Lewis over on TikTok and follow me there if you're using that app. But wherever you are, our mission is to help inspire you. Hey, everybody. Ted Danson here to tell you about my podcast with my longtime friend, and sometimes co-host Woody Harrelson. It's called Where Everybody Knows yous Name, and we're back for another season. I'm so excited to be joined this season by friends like John Mulaney, David Spade, Sarah Silverman, Ed Helms, and many more. You don't want to miss it. Listen to Where Everybody Knows yous Name with me, Ted Danson, and Woody Harrelson sometimes, wherever you get your podcasts. to give you the tools, the information, the resources to take your life to the next level. I love you very much. You know what time it is? It's time to go out there and do something great. Hey everybody, Ted Danson here to tell you about my podcast with my longtime friend and sometimes co-host Woody Harrelson. It's called Where Everybody Knows yous Name, and we're back for another season. I'm so excited to be joined this season by friends like John Mulaney, David Spade, Sarah Silverman, Ed Helms, and many more. You don't want to miss it. Listen to Where Everybody Knows yous Name with me, Ted Danson, and Woody Harrelson.

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