Gabriel Iglesias Opens Up About MENTAL HEALTH, Moving On From RELATIONSHIPS, & Why He Almost RETIRED
25 Mar 2024 · 74 min
Gabriel Iglesias talks to Lewis Howes about mental health struggles, therapy, and why he nearly walked away from comedy. He opens up about managing fame, relationships, and finding peace as a public figure.
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Welcome to the School of Greatness. I am your host, Lewis Howes, and today we have a very special guest joining us. He's known for his larger than life personality and his ability to make people laugh all around the world. From sold out arenas to viral YouTube videos, he's a comedy powerhouse with a heart of gold. Please welcome the one and only Gabriel Iglesias.
I just shared a lot with you and you don't realize how much I've shared. Being vulnerable is hard to do and it's scary.
The first comedian to Sell out Dodger Stadium. One of the world's most successful and popular standup comedians, Gabriel Iglesias, who is known as Fluffy.
I got to a place where you want to talk about not feeling good. I talked about retiring, especially right after Dodger Stadium, because that put me in a different place mentally. Because it's not every day you can say that you saw your peak. We allow certain behavior to continue because we're trying to keep certain people in our lives. And unfortunately, some people should not be in our lives. I took on the pain and the frustration and the issues because I didn't want to be the bad person who said, let me hit the stop button. All that stuff I just shared with you about struggles and the relationships and stuff like that, I haven't talked about that on stage yet.
Who is Fluffy versus who is Gabriel in your mind?
Gabriel does have bad days.
Really? Puppy can't have bad days.
He's not supposed to.
And.
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Welcome back everyone at the School of Greatness very excited about our guests We have the inspiring Gabriel Iglesis in the house. Goodce, sir Thanks, signor here Ola Monte.
Agusto It was us. Mexicans hate it when white people try to speak Spanish to them out the gate, just so you know.
Yeah, especially when they're not fluent. Yeah, exactly. So good to connect with you and congrats on everything, man. It's been inspiring to see the journey and to, and the thing that I really appreciate about you is how vulnerable and honest you are with your message, with your work, and with the interactions you have. Obviously, you're extremely funny, and you've amassed this massive audience of 25 million people globally that are consistently consuming and watching you. But I love how real and authentic you are with your comedy. And so I just wanted to acknowledge you for the journey you've been on, the impact you've made, and the joy you bring to so many people in the world.
Thank you.
And I'm curious, as someone at your level, who is always on the road with a lot of success over the last, you know, 15 plus, 18 plus years now, how do you manage fame, success while also being happy and finding inner peace?
I think you got to go through all the same issues that normal people go through, you know, you got to go through the moments of heartache, you know, I cry, I have my good days, my bad days, I have my days where I just want to scream into a pillow, I want to throw something, but you find a way to get through it. I'm very fortunate that I get to air out a lot of my issues on stage because I do. I will take things that bother me and I will go on stage and I will vent about them. And I find that by doing that, people can relate. People can relate to when you're frustrated, people can relate to when you're not having the best of days. and you share a moment, you know, whether it's like me dealing with issues as a parent or me dealing with issues as, you know, oh man, something happened today where, you know, I hit my knee or I'm dealing with a friend that's just bugging the hell out of me because they have a certain way of thinking and I'm trying to explain something or just dealing with, you know, trying to get through the day. Everybody has problems and when you can relate to people's problems. It for some reason it helps me. You know, I went to therapy for two years after my last breakup trying to figure out what I did wrong. And I realized, you know what? It wasn't all me. Because in the beginning, I thought it was. And going, you know, doing that actually helped out a lot. It taught me how to listen. It taught me how to ask myself questions and have a better understanding. And I think that For many years, I thought I knew it all and clearly I didn't. And that's one thing I appreciate about the fact that as I'm getting older, I'm realizing, all right, now we're finally getting into a good groove. We're finally understanding and things are starting to make sense. Inner peace, first of all, you got to know what not having peace is to really understand peace. So unfortunately, I have had some rough moments where I'm like, I am miserable. I am freaking miserable. And not because of my work. I love what I do. It is the greatest feeling in the world. But there are things in life, not just your career, there's, you know, regular everyday life, the people that you engage with. And yeah, there have been serious moments where I'm like, I am so unhappy right now. So once those things are taken care of or they're gone. When you talk about having peace and feeling good, knowing what true misery is helps you really understand what peace is. And I don't think you can have one without the other. And so you gotta, you gotta know, you gotta, you gotta be able to bleed to know what it's like to feel good. Wow. And I think that starting off this year, 2024, I feel so good. And I haven't said that in so long. I feel really, really good and I feel happy and I feel like I'm in a good direction and I'm in a good place in life right now.
Congrats, man. What do you think has been the darkest or most miserable moments you've had?
You know, I think that feeling confused is something that definitely is painful, not knowing, living in a gray area of confusion, not being able to have clarity and understanding, especially in relationships, not knowing where you stand. And a lot of times, I think we're the ones responsible for that because we allow certain behavior to continue because we're trying to keep certain people in our lives. And unfortunately, some people should not be in our lives. and that is a hard pill to swallow as well because as much as whether it's friends, family, or business acquaintances, some people do not belong in your life. And the sooner you can get them out, the better you're gonna be. And unfortunately, there was times when I didn't just have days or months or a year. I've allowed situations to go on for a very long time. because I didn't want to be the bad guy to pull the plug.
Really?
And so I took on the pain and the frustration and the issues because I didn't want to be the bad person who said, let me hit the stop button. Because I didn't want to be that person. But at the same time, I wasn't doing myself any favors by not stopping or correcting certain things that were happening.
Yeah, I can relate to that because I've been in, I'm a slow learner sometimes, and I have to go through a lot of pain in order to learn lessons. And I had many long-term relationships, intimate relationships that I should have been out of much years before I got out of them and dealt with a lot of pain by trying to people please, by trying to change myself to keep someone happy that was just never going to be happy with me. And so I can relate to that feeling when When did you feel like you learned that lesson or what shifted inside of you that allowed you to say, okay, I can no longer be this way anymore with this person or these people in my life?
I'm still learning and it's one of those things where maybe this period of time was good and helpful and it allowed growth and joy and happiness, but then maybe, you know, letting it go this long just kind of like, like it's now it's going down and now it's going in the opposite direction. I'm still learning and I'm still adjusting and the people that I've started with are not the people that are, you know, always the ones, the ones you start with are not always the ones you end with and fortunately there have been many people that are still in my life that I've been on this quest with for so many years. For example, like my team, the team of people that I have, I still have the same manager and agent that I've had for, God, like 20 years now.
Wow.
You know, and it's awesome. And the fact that we've all grown together has been on the same promoter as well.
Wow.
So I've been very, in a business of show business, you're always jumping around. It's always go go this way, this way, whatever works. And, you know, it's very cutthroat. So the fact that I've been able to maintain and have this same group of people It's huge because the trust is there. And going back to that whole thing of having the wrong person in place, I had people in place that were making me question, are these the best people for me?
Interesting.
And I feel like loyalty is one of the strongest, biggest things that people take for granted because they're thinking about the money, they're thinking about this or that, but loyalty is so huge. Being able to trust someone is so huge and I think that a lot of people just kind of go, Eh, you know, whatever. And like, oh, and that's why for me to let people go is really, really hard because I'm like, Am I gonna make a mistake? Am I gonna regret this? You know, what's gonna happen? And so sometimes I will overthink. But being able to trust somebody and being able to have the right people in your corner is really huge and it is a big key to happiness and joy and peace. Wow.
That's powerful, man. I love that you talked about therapy, and I know you've talked about this in different interviews. I speak about it a lot on this show. Just my journey of healing and therapy and lessons I've learned and mistakes I've made. And I feel like it's been so beneficial to creating more clarity and peace inside of me by having a place to talk about challenges, pains, frustrations, upsets, things like that. what would you say are the three most powerful things you've learned through the therapy that you've done?
Again, being able to question myself. I know I'm not always right and I will never claim to always be right and that's one thing that I had to learn by going that, you know what? Just because you're popular, just because people like you doesn't mean you're always right. And I was writing that for a minute and I had to come with the reality that, you know what, dude? No, you're not, you're not always right. And, you know, that's a tough one to swallow right there.
Especially when you're selling out arenas and people are laughing at everything you say.
It's hard to, yeah, it's hard to admit that, yeah, because when you're doing all these great things, like, are you kidding? You're in magazines, you're in the top Forbes, you know, Maker of the Year type of thing. You're selling out stadiums, you're doing all kinds of crazy, you know, you got a frickin car collection that, you know, that Jay Leno's like, wow, like you're doing all these amazing things. So to be able to feel like, really, I'm wrong? You know, that's, it's hard. It took me a minute to really to get that. But, yeah, I admit it all the time now, man, yeah, that was stupid. I shouldn't have done that. So, yeah, I definitely feel like that, that was huge, being able to learn that. 'Cause I feel like I did need to learn. And nobody would tell me.
Really?
That's another thing. Once you're at a certain place where the wheels are moving really well and money is good at keeping people, Hey, let's keep this going here. Don't nobody tell them anything. Don't ruffle feathers. Don't upset them. Because if we mess this up, so who's gonna tell me I'm wrong? And that's a tough one. I had to figure that one out. Nobody said, you're wrong because they're not none of this. We're not going to mess any of this up. Right.
We don't want to stop the money.
Machine that's coming in right now and everything that's happening.
So.
Yeah.
But I can be wrong in business. I can be wrong in relationships. And. And I've been wrong in both. Yeah. I've made decisions where I'm like, oh, okay, maybe that didn't work out.
Right. Right. So when you're going on a, you know, if it's not a special, but you're just going out to a local comedy club to work out some Some material. Are you going on stage thinking about, okay, I had this thing that happened last week that I want to vent.
Yeah.
That I want to talk about. Have you already pre-planned the interpretation of it or is it more, I'm just gonna wing it out there and see what comes up for me in the flow?
I have the idea of what I want to talk about, but I don't know the verbiage yet.
Really?
I don't know the, you know, I'm just gonna go and, and every single bit starts off with me just literally freestyling it. Let's see how it goes. And then go back and you listen and you're like, okay, that doesn't sound right. Maybe we, you know, I should. And so the first time is just, here's what we got. And then you go back and then you start shaving off this or adding that and moving stuff around. But everything just starts off with the first. Let's just throw it at the wall, see what happens.
Okay.
What if people don't laugh? Then I make fun of the fact that they didn't laugh. Really? I'm in a very good place now because of so many years of doing stand up. The trust is there. The trust is there from the crowd. So if I say something that's not the funniest or it just it doesn't get the I feel pretty confident. So if something doesn't get a laugh, I'm gonna find something to make. I'm gonna find something to make fun of. you know, or, you know, hey, you guys, they all can't be funny. Or if I'm at a club, if I'm at a club and I just popped in and people are like, oh my God, you know, like, you know, if I get a reaction when I walk in the room and I do a bit that doesn't fly and I just look around and I go, yeah, see, that's what happens when you don't pay for the show. This is what you get for free, people.
Right.
You've had so much years of experience with this. You know how to spin something. And I'm not uncomfortable.
If they don't laugh, they don't laugh. Really? You know, if they're quiet, I always say this. if the audience is dead quiet and you can hear a pin drop, that's a good thing because that means they're listening. Wow. A lot of people are afraid of silence, and I'm not. I'm more afraid of heckling and distractions in the room. So whether there's a ceiling fan on or the air conditioner is making a weird sound or you hear glasses and clinking of, you know, you're trying to talk and you hear little noises in the room, That'll be $4.50. Hey, you got a credit card? You know, sometimes I'll have servers right in the front row, like a big old plate with eight burgers on it. Here you go! You couldn't do this half hour ago with the opening acts? You had to put like eight burgers and bring them right here in the front. The kitchen's backed up! I'm like, oh my God. All right, and that's funny to people to see me in that situation. I'm like, you want me to perform and you got all this food right.
Here in the front.
All right, you wonder why bears attack, you know, the circus, so.
Sure, that's funny, man. Do you ever feel insecure on stage?
I'm always insecure.
Really?
Yeah.
I'm always insecure, like, ah, man, how's it gonna go? Like, oh, did they like that? You know, was it okay? Was it funny enough? are they gonna come back? Are they gonna tell their friends? You know, that's always in, in my head. I feel confident going up on stage every time, but they're, the insecurities are always there. That's part of it. I think that if the insecurities go away, it's gonna keep me from working hard to make people laugh. They always say, once you think you're the, that's when you become. Wow. So, you know, so I, I embrace the insecurities. I embrace the fact that You know, it's, you're working without a net. You know, when you go up on stage, you are the writer, the producer, the director, you are the everything. And so it's, you know, it all falls on you.
Wow, man, this is crazy. So you have confidence, but you also have a sense of insecurity or uncertainty.
I know that stand-up is the thing that I do better than, that's the best thing I can do. That's what I'm good at. You know, I'm not a good hiker. I'm not a good... You know, I don't know how to code. I don't know that there's a lot of things I don't know how to do, but I feel very confident when I'm going on stage, I know that I'm doing something that I love to do and I know how to do it well, but that doesn't mean that I can't have a bad moment or I can't have something that's not gonna go the way it should.
Wow.
Remember earlier, you know, just because he's doing all this, I can have a bad time on stage. I can be wrong. An idea just might not fly.
How do you separate your intimate, personal breakdowns in life that you might be having or from the past, if maybe a relationship isn't working the way you want to that day or that week, or you're going through some challenges with a friend or someone in your personal life? How do you disassociate that by going on stage and bringing this joy and passion and creativity while not letting that affect you emotionally? While also, you might be talking about some of those things as well from your personal life. How do you manage that to still bring that?
I incorporate it. I have to put it in the set somehow. I have to decompress a little bit. by, by putting it in there. And, you know, so whether it's me venting about it for a couple seconds, just maybe a little blip or maybe it's something on social media. Yeah. And I, and that's a dangerous one, too, because that's, that's out there forever. Either. Ah, it's, it's a hard one because.
Like, if you're not feeling good about.
You, if I'm not feeling good, it's really hard to share that with. with, you know, I have a very small circle, so it's like it's hard to share because as much as, you know, you want to trust that people are gonna keep things to themselves, sometimes they don't. And then it's like, ah, then that, that becomes, the problem becomes worse. And so sometimes I do find myself, you know, talking to strangers about certain things, and a lot of people say, really? With strangers? Yeah, yeah, I'm good at talking to strangers, you know, no problem. Especially because they don't know all the inner workings. They just see me as this, which is why sometimes, man, having a drink, you know, like, yeah, yeah, you just, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I can't do that all the time and it's hard for me to go places, but every now and then just, you know, shooting the s**t with somebody. This is cool because you don't know everything about my inner workings and I just shared a lot with you and you don't realize how much I've shared. But I feel good doing it. I was like, yeah. You know, like that whole talk about the whole inner peace thing. I'm like, wow, look at me saying stuff out loud. Conversations like that are very helpful.
They are.
And again, being able to talk to people that are not gonna flip it on you and use it against you. Being vulnerable is hard to do and it's scary.
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You know, when you, when you show weakness, man, you know, people can just take that and, and, you know, mess up your day. And so sometimes you want to just keep it to yourself. But if you keep it to yourself, then you get up, get to a point where you might, you might explode, and that's not going to be good either.
Yeah.
I asked this question to a lot of people, and I'm curious. your answer on this. It's a self-assessment. On a scale of one to 10, I call it the self-love scale. The inner peace and self-love scale. Where would you say that you're currently at, you know, this season of life? From one being you have zero self-love and zero inner peace to 10 being a lot of self-love and all peace inside of you. Where would you say you're currently on that scale? One to 10?
One to ten, I'm probably at a six, five, maybe close to a seven. Yeah. I feel good, but I know that there are so many things that I could do to improve my quality of life, so many things that I could be doing to make myself happier, so many things I could be doing to just give myself a. A better. A better place, if that makes sense. Like, you know, I know that if I was to. wake up every morning and go just go take a walk that would improve my health. I know that if I didn't drink that could help, you know, certain things with like, you know, make organs feel better or maybe the skin will be, you know, I know that if I made certain choices, it would improve. And so it's, you know, as far as self-love, like, I feel pretty good right now. Yeah, but, you know, the week is young.
When do you feel like, when do you feel like you've been on the lowest on that scale? If you can reflect back.
Lowest on that scale is when I was trying to make people happy that weren't gonna, that weren't gonna be happy and definitely weren't gonna be making me happy.
Really?
Killing yourself, trying to please others is one of those things that I'm guilty of doing so many times. And I've given so many of the wrong people, my time, energy and love, when I should have been giving that to myself. And so I'm guilty of giving till it hurts and giving till I hurt myself. And I definitely would like to, because I'm not gonna get that time and all that back. And so the goal is to try to turn all of that and start doing more for me.
Wow, that's beautiful, man. I can relate to that so much because growing up, I just-- you- cry, bro.
I felt it, man. I felt it.
I mean, I cry a lot out here, man. But I relate to that just because growing up, I felt very alone. I felt very alone. I felt very abandoned and abused. Now, that doesn't mean that's the total truth, but there were certain moments and memories that caused me to feel Not enough, often. I was sexually abused when I was five by a man that I don't know. I've talked about this openly many times here. My brother was in prison when I was eight years old for four and a half years, so I wasn't allowed to have friends in the neighborhood because my older brother was bad and wrong and therefore parents would have let their kids hang out with me. I was in special needs classes. It was really hard for me to read and write and just remember what I was learning in school. So I was in those special classes with like three or four kids getting made fun of, getting picked on. And, you know, I just never felt enough. I never felt like I was good enough. And so that, I guess, those memories, those experiences, those wounds caused me to people please a lot in my 20s and early 30s until it felt like it was gonna kill me, until I had heart palpitations, pain in my chest, I was making a lot of money to prove people wrong and succeeding externally, but feeling very insignificant, lonely and sad internally. And it wasn't until I started to really break down, get some support, go to therapy, start to transform, heal, that's when I started to have more clarity and more peace. Do you feel like you know where a lot of that people pleasing came from for you?
First of all, I'm sorry for what you went through and I relate a lot to what you just said, especially the people pleasing and just trying to, you know, you figure if you're making people happy then hopefully you'll feel happy and maybe they'll make you happy and that's a tough one. It really is. I don't know where that came from because I do feel like you know, even though I didn't grow up with both parents, I had my mom, who was an incredible person. I miss her very much. She gave me everything I I needed in life to, you know, to. To be okay. You know, I I didn't have all the toys, but, you know, my Christmases were not horrible, you know? And even though we lived in a rough area, she still protected me and kept me from becoming. the environment. So I don't know where that comes from. I mean, I basically grew up an only child because my sister and my sisters and my brother were all much older. You know, there's like 14 years between my sister. I want to say 30 about roughly. Yeah.
Yeah.
So by the time I showed up, everybody was already gone. They're all out of the house. So it's like it was just my mom and I. So, yeah, I I don't know where this comes from.
Interesting.
Yeah.
But it sounds like you've realized this was something you were doing, you've stopped doing it, and now you're starting to give back to you.
And this is very recent, because I mean, I'm still guilty of it. And I still, unfortunately, I still allow certain people to have behaviors that are not good for them and definitely not good for me.
Really? Why do you think you allow that still?
Because I love them. Because I don't want to hurt their feelings. I don't want to I don't want to feel bad for making them feel bad, even though I know that this is not benefiting either one. I don't like the idea of knowing that what I'm about to do is going to cause ripples of unhappiness, even though it's sometimes necessary to correct what's going on. And that's why it's like, you know, it's almost like, all right, maybe. And you always want to hope that they see it, they get it, they understand it. They'll change on their own.
Yeah.
And, man, some people just.
Yeah, man.
And, yeah. So because of how close they are and how long they've, you know, they've been part of everything, it's, it's really hard. It's really hard. And so that's why I haven't, I haven't. you know, because this year started off so good.
Yeah.
You know, I'm like, man, I should have done that last year. This way I wouldn't have carried over, but no.
Well, now you have the opportunity. I'm curious, you know, on this show, I really love to talk about living our best lives and what's, what's possible for us, the things that we can have control over, the things that we can learn and can develop and, and sharing that with anyone watching or listening around the world. I'm curious, you said, you know, five, six, six and a half, maybe seven at this point on the self-love inner peace scale. What do you think it would take from you to get to a eight, nine, or maybe 10 sometimes? I'm not saying you have to be perfect all the time, but what would it take to, from you to be a little bit higher consistently on that scale?
A little bit higher consistently. Definitely on the physical side, you know, I think that, you know, again, limiting and the, the drinking, limiting the, you know, because I, I, I, I will binge eat if I'm not feeling good, and I'll just, you know, not, I'm not like my 600 pound life or anything, but I might have more than one burger, you know? And so I think that if I changed some of my habits, I think that would, that would definitely help. But I use these habits as crutches, too, whenever I'm dealing. you know, sometimes it's easier to just drink and fall asleep than freaking having to, you know, get into a situation that's very uncomfortable. And I'm guilty of doing that. So I think that if I were to. I know, and I know that if I did certain things, I would be in a better place. Yeah, I'm very comfortable, and that's a. That's a problem, too. I don't like feeling uncomfortable. And by changing certain, you know, ways that you do things, it's like. And developing new habits is really hard. So I know that, but I do know that it would be beneficial. I know that every day I walk by a gym that I have at home. I have a home gym. Nice one. A really nice one. Oh, nice one.
Expensive one.
Yes.
How often do you use it?
I don't. I haven't used it in a long time. And that's something that I'm like, every time I walk by it, I'm like, ah, God, it's still there. It's still there. I should freaking go lift something. and I do feel guilty for not doing it. And then what I wind up doing.
I wind up eating.
I'm like, I'm doing the complete opposite. What am I? And I'm laying there, I'm full, I feel good, but then I feel guilty and I'm like, ugh. So as far as a self-love, it feels like love at the moment, but I'm hurting myself. Yeah. So I know that there's a lot of things that I could be doing. Also, limiting the amount of time that I give to people that that don't make me feel good, I think is a tough one.
Yeah.
Back to that, that would improve the self-love.
Sure. I'm curious about identity. You know, I used to use a lot of words growing up about myself to myself and to others. I would say, I'm an idiot, I'm stupid, I'll never learn these things, I'm not smart. I was in the bottom of my class, bottom of four in my class. They used to grade us or rank us in our classes where I was in school. So I could always see that was in the bottom four consistently all through middle school and high school. So it just always, I was just like, I'm never gonna be good enough. I'm never gonna learn like you guys. I would say these words and built an identity about me to self that would limit me and to others that would limit me. How much does the identity you've built for yourself empower you or hold you back, would you say?
I know that You know, when people see me on the streets, I'm fluffy. Hey, fluffy!
You!
Know, it's very rare that I'll get, you know, Gabriel. Really? They'll say fluffy and then like, who is it? It's Gabriel Iglesias, you know what I mean? It's all tied together, but it's so much easier to call somebody by the nickname. It's an easy nickname. And it's not like it's a different person. It's just it's a nickname that's, you know, it's me. But, I am seen a certain way because of the shows and the consistency that, oh, you know, he's the guy that talks about his son, he's the guy that talks about his friend, he's the guy that. So I'm limited in the sense that if I was to all of a sudden start talking about politics or become, you know, start venting and being very vulgar, being, you know, that, you know, I mean, there are times when I do want to vent. and I can't on stage because it's not something that goes with what I've created and it's not gonna be well received by everyone. I might hit a few. There might be some people that will relate to what I'm saying, but I'm gonna ruffle a lot of feathers in the process. And so I have to remind myself this is not the place to do that. So because of what I built there, I can't, you know, I can't be 100 right here. This is not gonna go well.
But what about the identity with Fluffy?
The identity with Fluffy? No, always happy. And that's not always the case. You know, always happy, always in a good mood. I'm not always in a good mood. And every time I go out in public, I always, I'm afraid that people are, Gonna Like I don't want to meet somebody run into somebody if I'm not having the best of days so I try not to not to put myself in environments where I'm gonna run into people I'm not one who's gonna be like no, I don't want to take a picture. I'm not gonna snap on somebody and and photos is it's part of the deal if I can do it and there's time for it absolutely no problem But there are times when I'm dealing with issues and problems and I'm just like, oh, I just want to go to the drive through, get something to eat and just go back home. But, you know, because of the fact that I'm seeing a certain way, it's like you got to always be smiling. You got to always be happy. You got to always be that and that that is hard because sometimes you just want to be a normal person.
I understand that.
Yeah. You know, you just, you know, like, yeah, how's he doing? Nice.
Yeah, don't talk to him right now. Yeah.
He's in one of the moments.
I'm a big believer that our habits and our identity will shape our lives and our goals and the way we feel about ourselves will naturally take care of themselves based on the consistency of our habits and on the identity that we give ourselves. And so I guess I just wanted to ask about the identity of Fluffy. You mentioned this, how people call you Fluffy. Do you think that supports your success but holds you back in other ways? Or do you feel like that is an empowering thing for you with your identity and where you want to be?
There are so many more pros than there are cons. The cons are very small. They're very small. No, man, let me tell you, when people, when you get recognized, you know, I have other friends that are, you know, other comics and I know a lot of people that are famous, and I don't know, man. I don't want to say that mine is better, but for some reason, when I get recognized, it's, I'm not seeing like, oh, it's Jay-Z kind of a thing. The recognition I get from people, the look is almost like, hey, man, this guy's like seeing a family member you haven't seen in a long time. And I feel that from people. when I get recognized, it's very different. I see how other people get recognized and I'm like, wow, okay, with me it's a lot different. I get people right away that are like, the glow and the energy is very, it's like, it feels like family, like a moment, like a real sweet, sweet thing. And I love that. It tells me that what I'm doing is making a difference, what I'm doing, 'cause I get a lot of people also that will open up. you know, hey, man, I was going through this, and I was watching, and, hey, man, just so you know, you, I've heard you've helped me get through so many times, and it's, that's an incredible feeling, and that's a game changer. So when I hear something like that, it changes the, whatever mood I'm in, it, it corrects it. I'm like, you know what? Stop, stop thinking like that. You know, you're, whatever you're dealing with is nothing. This dude is like, he just you know, put things into perspective.
Sure.
So being fluffy is, is very much a, it's a good thing. A lot of pros to it.
Yeah.
A lot of pros. Do I wish I could vent about certain things? Of course I do. But I think that it's, it's part of the deal. You have to sacrifice. This is part of the sacrifice to be where I'm at. You mentioned some people will just say.
Hey, fluffy on the streets or whatever, and they'd be like, oh, it's Gabriel Iglesias. You know, who is Fluffy versus who is Gabriel in your mind?
They're pretty much like this. But, you know, Gabriel does have bad days.
Really? Fluffy can't have bad days.
He's not supposed to. And if I do, I try to find a way to push it into the show. Like, for example, in my show right now without giving too much away because I have a new special coming out, one of the things I'm talking about is I'm talking about things that happened to me that weren't great, weren't fun, weren't awesome. I'm starting to incorporate more of, you know, after so many years and now I'm almost, I'm coming up on 50 pretty soon. Wow. You know, there's more things that have happened. For example, I'm talking about the fact that I almost died in a plane crash that made the news. Wow. I'm talking about the fact that they broke into my house. You know, someone broke into my house and went through my things and just, you know, a bad situation. I'm talking about that. I reunited with my father, who I haven't seen in 15 years and how awkward that was. And so there's now moments where I'm like, okay, you know, so it's not all like, hey, rainbows and unicorns type of thing. It's like, okay, you know, so the challenge now is making those situations funny. Near death, how can you make that funny? That's, you know, that's a challenge. Wow. But I am talking more about things that aren't as fun and pleasant.
It seems like there's so many people, you mentioned this earlier about how people think that it's overnight the success that you've had, or they might say that, but you've been doing this for 25 plus years now. And it seems like the younger generation wants this type of success very fast. They want to be able to sell out arenas, they want to be able to have 25 million followers on social media like you overnight. They want people to walk around the streets and call out their name.
What.
Is the dark side to all of this? What's the dark side of being famous and successful, of having these arenas sold out to, you know, all these different things that are happening in a good way? What's the challenge for people wanting that, maybe for the wrong reasons?
I think that now, anytime, like new comedians definitely don't have patience. I think that one thing that's missing is struggle. Nobody wants to struggle. Nobody wants to take the time. Everybody does want everything right now. And I appreciate the fact that when I first started doing this, there was no social media. The internet was brand new. You know, you didn't even know what to do with it back then. I feel very fortunate that I know that life without it, and I know the life with it. And I know all the years that it took to get to this point. So I, it's, it's one of those things where I, you know, when, when new comics say, hey, what advice do you have? I said, I wish I could give you advice that would benefit you in these times. I go, but my advice is old advice for, you know, a kid that started in 1997, not someone who's starting right now. And I don't want to sound like, you know, back in my day, you know, this is how you gotta do it. And these kids don't know. I don't want to be that guy. So I just say, well, you just have as much fun as you can. I go, do you want to do comedy as a hobby? Do you want to do it as a business? What is, what is the reason you want to do this? Is it because you want to be popular? You want people to like you? What is it you want? And I go, if you want to make it a business, then treat it like a business. Respect it like a business. Understand that there's things that need to happen in order for this to work. If you want to just do it as a hobby, hey, then go to the comedy store on a Sunday night, get on the potluck, sign up, whatever, just go and have fun and do your thing and just enjoy it. It is what it is and then you're back to work on Monday. Right. And if you want to be popular and, you know, then that's a different thing. You want to go jump on TikTok? I am pretty savvy with social media, but I also know that there's certain things I don't know. And there's, there's, you know, people out there now that can sell out clubs and theaters and, and, and do shows because of what they did on social media. And it did take much less than my journey. But when they do their show, you can see in the performance that This is not somebody who's been doing it for a long time. Yes. So you might be able to sell that ticket one time, but can you sell it again?
Consistency is key.
Yeah. So it's different, man. Again, I appreciate the fact that I know the struggle. So because I know the struggle, I respect what I do more. And it wasn't handed to me. It wasn't like, oh, he just jumped in. this took a long time.
You were in an industry plant?
Yeah, I know, right? I'm glad I'm on Cat Williams' good side. We're friends. We're cool. We're cool.
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Should it stay or should it go? What if I mess it up?
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If you could go back, I guess 25, 30 years ago before you started to take off, before this journey really began for you. What three pieces of advice would you give that younger version of you right before you're about to take off on the business of Comedy, on your personal life, on everything? What three things would you say to your younger self?
It's funny because I've had this thought a million times, and as much as I would love to tell the younger version of me, hey, Don't eat all of it.
All right?
Hey, you know what? You know, don't trust everyone, you know, and don't date her. I can't because everything that has happened from day one, it all has to happen in order for me to be here right now. Any little change would send me in a completely different direction. And you know, that's me watching Back to the Future way too many times. Now, things that I do wish I would have done, not advice as far as career, but things I wish I would have done more of back then is I wish I would have spent more time with my mom. I wish I would have asked her for more life advice. and just had more conversations about things. But back then, when I was a kid, I thought I knew everything. And so as an adult, I'm like, man, I didn't know. And again, because I miss her so much, I just wish I would have spent more time with her. My siblings got to have my mom way longer than me. And so it was one of those. That's definitely one thing. I had a lot of fun. I had a lot of fun early on in my career and.
I.
Learned the business trial and error, whether it's with management or with doing this show versus doing that show, how you got booked, things you decided to do, things I decided not to do. So I mean, there's a lot of, a lot, a lot, I wanna say that I could have made better decisions, but again, things worked out pretty good.
You're in a good spot.
I do wish I could get some of that time back from those people, but I do think also I appreciate and I respect the amount of pain I was put through. Because I am enjoying the peace I have right now.
Yeah, that's beautiful.
I feel really good right now. Like my head is so clear and it just, it feels good.
You made a reference of Back to the Future and I'm gonna try to connect the dots here for what I was thinking.
This is space-time continuum.
I've had a number of different, I guess, inner painful challenges in my life, especially my 20s and 30s, from previous relationships I was in that were not in the right alignment. Nothing wrong with them. I choose poorly and I stayed in those things too long, right? And I remember just feeling a lot of pain and sadness when I was in those relationships, and the aftermath of the breakup and the pain and sadness there, all that different stuff. And I remember I was going through a breakup one time about, I don't know, five years ago, and I was feeling one of those painful moments, and I had a guest on I was telling him about what I was going through. And he told me a bad day for the ego is a great day for the soul. And he said, Think about all the past experiences you've had where you've had pain. And maybe you wouldn't wish that anyone would go through them and you didn't wish you had to go through them, but you also know you wouldn't take those things back because of what you learned through them. You just mentioned this, right? The lesson that they gave you, peace, you have clarity now. It's like, feeling that misery, now you can have peace because you know what that felt like. And so I started to travel in time in the future since that moment about five years ago when I've gone through challenging moments to think, how is this happening in my benefit for my future self? How is this painful moment, this season of life, going to benefit me in the future? And that's really helped me navigate these kind of painful moments easier, knowing that Everything in the past that I've been through, although it was hard and I didn't like it, I'm using it for my benefit now today. And it makes these other moments of beauty that much more beautiful. So it sounds like you've been doing that also.
Oh, yeah.
Which is really cool to see. If you can go into the future and see yourself 30, 40 years in the future, What advice would you give yourself now if you are in that future 30-40 years ahead and you're reflecting back on everything you've created now and you can speak to your current self, what would you say?
Stop drinking, start eating better, start working out and start enjoying the fruits of your labor.
Wow.
Stop saving all that money for who? Start enjoying life. Start taking some breaks. Start taking some trips. Start having some fun.
What's it gonna take for you to do those things? Like what's it actually gonna take for you to do that though and not just, you know, another year go by and say, well, yeah, I should start doing more of these things that my future self is telling me. What do you think it's gonna take?
What's it gonna take? I don't know what it's gonna take, but I'm saying it out loud and that's not something I've done before.
Really?
You know, I've not said this out loud back to back to back. So, you know, consider if it does happen, then consider this the first step. The saying it out loud.
That's great.
You know, because I've acknowledged publicly this is the issue.
That's great, man. I want to see you follow through on all of what your future self tells you to do. I think that'd be inspiring to watch. I got a few final questions for you. This has been really. really inspiring, Gabriel. I appreciate it. How can people best support and serve you? You give so much to the world, you give so much to your team, to your friends, to your community. How can people best support and serve you?
If they like what I do and I bring joy to their lives, tell somebody, you know, let people know, hey, you know, I'm only doing this because people still come to the shows. If people stop coming, then I stop doing this. So as long as people come out to the shows, and that's gonna keep me going. I got to a place where you wanna talk about not feeling good, not feeling positive about what I was doing. I talked about retiring. I talked about retiring because I wasn't sure that this was giving me what I needed. You know, I wasn't feeling good and it wasn't the stage that was hurting me. It was how I was feeling in just my everyday life. And I felt like a lot of it was coming from that. And it wasn't. It was just me not dealing with certain issues in my life. And I'm like, you know, what am I doing this for? I'm still on the road. It's been so many years. and I was reminded by my publicist yesterday. He goes, you know what? You kind of brought up the retirement thing a couple times. I go, yeah, you're right. I did, I did, I did. I said that. Because, you know, at this point, I'm like, what am I supposed to do? But I think that I'm clearly missing the fact that I do have a more of an impact than I thought I did on people's lives, and, and it helps more than it hurts. And I should continue to do this as long as I can. Yeah. I mean, and so the best way people could support me, just keep coming out.
There you go.
You know? Like your prices are too expensive. Everybody else got more expensive tickets. Look online.
Exactly.
Look online.
Why do you think, so you mentioned you wanted to retire multiple times. Was that a season of life?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Well, especially right after Dodger Stadium, because that put me in a different place mentally. Because it's not every day you can say that you saw your peak youk know, and it's hard to argue that one cuz it's like okay, this is the biggest is the biggest show that's ever happened in and on the west coast that I know of. Wow. I don't know of any other show that's been that big for comedy.
How many people were there?
Almost 50,000.
Holy cow.
Yeah, so, you know, so how do you set a new goal?
Interesting.
You know what I mean? It's like, okay, what am I supposed to do now? You're on the other side of that. And it's like, oh, you know, you freaking jump. Jump the shark, man. You're. You're, you know, so, like, in a perfect world, like, if it was a movie, I looked at it like a movie. Like, the best way would be to. To finish that night and thank you. Here's the end of the career.
Wow. You know?
And it was literally, I want to say, April, May, like three weeks after my 25th anniversary of being a comic.
Holy cow.
So I like numbers like that. Oh, after 25 years, like, this is how biggest show ever done. But I still love it. But at the same time, again, you know, dealing, having certain situations in life and then trying to do this, that night, everything just fell into place. It felt so good. Best night of my life. Hands down. Best night of my life. But then the next day, it's like, all right, now we're back to reality.
Really?
Did you kind of have like a hangover?
Emotional hangover?
I had an emotional and a physical one, 'cause I drank on stage that night. So I killed a bottle in front of-- and what I thought was really cool is that everybody-- well, I didn't see anybody leave, but it felt like even after my show was over, I stayed on stage and I just started telling random stories. I brought my friends out on stage and we're drinking and they're playing music. We had him playing Vicente Fernandez over and over and we're taking shots and just drinking and oh God, I want to say that it was almost $200,000 for the fine for going over. Oh yeah, when you ran out of stadium.
You gotta be out.
Yeah, you gotta, there's a cut off time. We went way past that. And so yeah, I got fined. Best fine I've ever paid.
Yeah, well you're willing to pay it.
Again, you know, it's not every day you can say that this was hands down, no question, best night of my life. But then, you know, all right, now what?
If you were to take a year off, let's say, not completely off, but maybe you pulled back on touring, maybe you weren't doing a special, maybe, you know, and I don't think anyone in your team wants me to even say this, but if you were just to pull back, what would you do with your time to take care of you?
That's an easy one. Uh, COVID. COVID kept me home for a year. And in that time that I was home for a year, I started eating better. I didn't drink as much. Really? I probably didn't drink at all. And I started working out. So I probably lost 70 pounds that year. Come on.
Yeah.
Wow. Because I was able to be consistent. I wasn't on the road, so I was home. I was able to get into a routine. You know, my friend, personal trainer, we were hanging out all the time. So we were just like, we were.
Hanging out and work out.
So we were walking, working out. Yeah. So it was just, you know, that whole year I dropped I dropped 70 pounds. Wow. Wow. And then as soon as we went back to work, I gained back about 40 of that. So fortunately, I still kept a little bit of that, you know, progress off. But, yeah, I'm not where I was in 2020. 2020, when everybody was kind of, yeah, getting sick, I actually got better. Interesting.
Man. Well, I know you.
So if I was to take a year off, and that's another reason, too, I says, well, you know, if I grinding it out there, all I'm doing on the road is making bad decisions. I'm drinking, I'm eating, I'm just, I'm not sleeping the way I should, I'm just, it's taxing, you know, it's go, go, go, travel, travel, travel, you're just, it's, you're all over the place and I'm not doing myself any good. And so that's another reason where I was like, oh, this isn't, you know, I should probably go away from this. And so that was one of the things about that experiment and then everything else that was happening.
I mean, I'm not saying you retire because you bring so much joy to the world, but you could do stuff at home, you could work at home, you could do TV shows, you could do other things with a routine in your bed, in your space, with the right support around you, and still work, maybe just a little less.
Oh, I know I could. And it's so much easier to make excuses. And the problem I have is I'm really, really good at making excuses. excuses.
Oh, I have to go do this tour or they need me.
Oh, I wish I could, but, you know.
Yeah. And.
And the problem is that I believe my own excuses, you know? And that's a tough one, man. I know that half the time I'm full of, like, come on, man. Really?
You know, I mean, I know we just met each other, and I know we're having, you know, this type of conversation here, but how could I support you in stopping the excuses for yourself?
Well again, having the conversation. I don't have these conversations. People in my circle aren't gonna pull me aside and go, you know, you really should stop eating so much and drinking so much and you know, it wouldn't kill you to lift a freaking weight. You know, you wanna go for a walk? It is an uncomfortable conversation because I'm being very vulnerable about the fact that this is a problem I have that I haven't addressed and I don't, I can make a million, I can make a million excuses, but in reality it's just me.
Yeah.
You know?
Yeah.
So the best way to support me is the fact that we're having this conversation.
Yeah, and I'm not trying to, you know, get you upset at me if we just met each other. Oh, I'm not mad. But my thing is, from an outside perspective, I see the talent that you have. I see the success you have. I see the career you've made that people would dream of having, right? Other comics are like, look at you as this, the career is like a dream career, right? But I think about your 80 year old self and what he wants for you. That's what I think about, is what is your 80 year old you want for you at 80, at 50, at 60, at 70, you know? And he wants you happy, he wants you healthy, and he wants you feeling good. That's what I think. from an outside perspective. So I have this conversation with you because I want to see you continue to bring joy to so many people in the world for a long time. And I want to see you bring joy to yourself for a long time. So that's why I have the uncomfortable conversation with you. Risking you getting frustrated at me.
Nice.
But I want to see how I can support. So I'm going to follow up with you afterwards, man, and see how I can support you eliminate these excuses because it's not easy. I have excuses for myself with different things as well that I need coaching, I need accountability, I need to, you know.
Oh, yeah. Those are tough words. I had learned a lot of those words in therapy. Accountability.
Oh, yeah.
That's a big one right there. Oh, man. Yeah, no one wants to be responsible and accountable. That's a tough one right there.
It's not, especially when you've created so much for yourself. You worked so hard. You've worked your butt for so long. And you want to enjoy some of it too, so I get it. I get it. I'll stop with the uncomfortable conversations. I wanted to ask you a question. This is what I ask everyone at the end of our conversations. This is called the Three Truths.
The Three Truths.
Three Truths. So it's a hypothetical scenario. But I do want you to think about you going to the very end of your life and you get to live as long as you want. Live as long as you want, but eventually it's the last day for you. And you get to create, accomplish, experience all the things you want for the rest of your life from this moment until then. Friends, love, success, whatever it might be, you create. But for whatever reason on this final day, you have to take all of your work with you. This interview is gone, all your specials, everything you create from here moving forward, We don't have access to it in this world anymore. You got to take it with you somewhere. But you get to leave behind three things you know to be true. And this is all we would have to remember you by, these three truths or your top three lessons. What would you say would be those three truths for you?
The three things to leave behind. But you said, you just said three truths. Three truths. Three truths as far as just your life lessons.
This is all you would want people to have access to these three things because everything would be taken with you. All your content, jokes, this interview, anything you create.
What if I get to leave three things behind? Couldn't I leave behind my content?
If you wanted to, I mean, three lessons that you could share. That's it.
Oh man, three lessons.
Hypothetical scenario.
Definitely the one about struggle, you know, 'cause I don't think that you can't appreciate things until you know what it's like to have to work for them, to earn them, to. To have to. To get some sweat on your brow, to get some dirt under your fingernails. So respecting and understanding struggle, I I don't think that there's enough of that. You know, that's definitely one, because to appreciate something, you have to know. what it's like to not have it and what it takes to get to that. And that's why, you know, when people have certain things handed to them, it's like, oh, man, you're not, it's cool. What do you mean it's cool? I was like, oh, my God.
So that's number one.
Okay, one, two, I guess, patience. You know, nothing comes quick in life that's worth anything. This is a tough one, 'cause I want to just say, I want people to remember the content, because I feel like, you know, it's a good one.
Yeah, I get it.
So three truths, patience, and I don't know. That's a good one. What have people said in the past, just so I have an idea of the...
I mean, mine have shifted over time, but currently they would be to, live in gratitude.
Okay.
Because I feel like when we live in gratitude, it's hard to be angry, resentful, frustrated, resent, you know, pissed off as all these other different challenging things that we might have. When we live in gratitude, we can appreciate the things we do have, and as opposed to the things we're lacking. The second one for me would be to honor your health, because I. And that's spiritual, physical, emotional health. because when we don't honor it, it's going to cause more pain on us and it's going to create more sadness and suffering. We could be completely physically fit, but mentally in a horrible place with ourselves and still be suffering, but look fit, but emotionally, mentally or spiritually lacking. So we've got to focus on all those aspects of health. The third truth for me would be to live in service. Something I think you do really well. You get up on stage and you serve people with your talents and your gifts. And when we learn what our talents and gifts are by developing them, by trying things, by trying to master them and then using them in the service of helping others in whatever way that is, I feel like that's a great life. So living in gratitude. Really protecting and honoring our health and living in service would be my three truths.
That's pretty awesome. I don't know, I feel like a for saying, yeah, live behind my DVD collection. People can watch my collection.
No, but I think you're first to about, you know, kind of honoring the struggle, not having everything handed to you. Living with patience, all great things come in time through patience. What would you say would be the third one? that speaks to you.
And I wish I could do this myself. Don't overthink it's not worth it. You know, but I'm guilty of it myself, so it's kind of a hypocritical one.
We all say the last thing we usually need the most, you know, and hopefully we can learn that on our journey. So I think you'll be able to get there. Gabriel, I'm really grateful for you. Again, I want to acknowledge you for the consistency you've done in your life to serve people with your talent and your gifts. to bring joy, humor. You bring families together, you bring people together, you allow people to relax, reflect, release, you know, have fun and be themselves. You are able to share your life story so people can relate and know that they're not alone. So I really want to acknowledge you for the talent, the gifts that you've had. Thank you for the last 25 plus years, and I'm sure for many more years to come. And I have two final questions really quickly because I have a hard out and I think your team is probably telling me I gotta get wrap this up. What is the thing that you are most proud of that most people don't know about you? Maybe that's not really out there publicly or things that they don't see. What's the thing you're most proud of that most people don't know about?
I have given two little dogs an incredible life.
And.
I've gone to the ends of the earth to try to make these two little dogs the happiest dogs. I really love my dogs. I've worked really hard to make it so that I can take them, have them around me at all times because they bring me so much joy. And so I, I'm a big, you know, I love, I love dogs, and I'm, I feel good for all the time. I don't ever regret any time that I've spent with them or just, you know, whatever it is to, to try to make them happy. And I love doing things for them.
That's beautiful.
And my pets, you know, my babies.
That's cool, man. Yeah.
And so I, I enjoy. Yeah, I enjoy the the fact that I do that and people find out, oh, you got your, and I'm one of those at the airport, hey, look at this, my dog. Show me your dog.
Yeah, your screensaver.
Yeah.
You know, loving, loving animals, loving, you know, that's beautiful.
It's one of those things where it's.
It'S, you know, dogs don't care what's in the bank. They don't care what you drive. They don't care what you do. You know, they just care that you love them, that you, you know, you're around them and, and that's, that's so pure. It's just like, man, look. you just, you know, so I love that. I love that.
That's beautiful. Final question for you, Gabrielle. What's your definition of greatness?
Ooh, I guess it all depends on what the, what we're describing. It's the, is it the greatest table, the greatest coffee mug, the greatest, you know, singer, dancer, songwriter, you know, when.
You.
The definition of greatness is when it's far surpasses the expectation. You know, something that just is like, are you kidding me? You know, so we're like, the greatest coffee mug. Like, oh, so you touch it, it plays music, lights come out of it, it pours itself. You know what I mean? Like, this is the greatest coffee, you know? everything could be like, because I just expect this to hold whatever liquid is in it and the handle to work. But if there's, you know, whatever it is, is more, way more than what you hoped for. That I think is, is what greatness is. So whether it's, you know, you just hope that this person was decent, and then you found out not only are they a decent person, man, but this person just goes above and beyond to try to make others happy. They, they, they give their time, they, they donate, they they, you know, they help, you know what I mean? It's like there's, there's expectations and then there's, you know, things that supersede that. And that's, I think, what greatness is. You're real.
Thanks for coming on, man. Appreciate you.
Thank you.
I hope you enjoyed today's episode, and it inspired you on your journey towards greatness. Make sure to check out the show notes in the description for a full rundown of today's episode with all the important links. And if you want weekly exclusive bonus episodes with me personally, as well as ad free listening, then make sure to subscribe to our Greatness Plus Channel exclusively on Apple podcasts. Share this with a friend on social media and leave us a review on Apple podcasts as well. Let me know what you enjoyed about this episode and that review. I really love hearing feedback from you and it helps us figure out how we can support and serve you moving forward. And I want to remind you of no one Someone has told you lately that you are loved, you are worthy, and you matter. And now it's time to go out there and do something great.
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