How To Heal Your Mind & Begin Changing Your Future [BONUS EPISODE Presented By BetterHelp]

This episode was sponsored by better help online therapy. Big thanks to Hasu Joe, licensed therapist and head of clinical operations at better help. Hasu Joe is not my actual therapist, and we are not in a therapist client relationship. Also, just because you might hear something on the show that sounds similar to what you're experiencing, beware of self diagnosis. You'll want to find a qualified professional to assess and explore diagnosis if that's important to you.

Welcome to the school of greatness. Goodness, my name is Lewis Howes, former pro athlete turned lifestyle entrepreneur. And each week we bring you an inspiring person or message to help you discover how to unlock your inner greatness. Thanks for spending some time with me today. Now let the class begin.

Welcome everyone to this special episode. We have an inspiring guest. Hesu Joe in the house from Better Help. And I wanted to break down this episode to talk about different topics around mental health, emotional well-being, and really getting clear on how to optimize your whole body, connecting your thoughts, your emotions, and your body, and integrating your life with authentic alignment. When we are out of alignment with our thoughts and our emotions, and we store memories from the past that hold trauma inside of us, It holds us back. It makes us feel more fearful. It makes us doubt ourselves. It makes us feel overwhelmed or stressed or anxious in times where maybe we don't need to feel those things. There's different times when, you know, stress and overwhelm is a good signal to get you to relax and calm down, but it doesn't necessarily mean that there is a threat in your life. And sometimes we live with this fear inside of us, this ongoing anxiety inside of us that makes it feel like fight or flight constantly happening in our lives. And that doesn't allow us to get into a relaxed state of being, a beautiful state of being that allows for creativity, abundance, flow, prosperity, and the ability to feel and receive love. And I think a lot of us, including myself, have struggled with some of these things over our lifetime. because we've never been taught the tools. We've never been given the training and we haven't understood the science or the research behind how we can optimize things to flourish better in our inner world and also in our outer world. And our life is really made up of moments of memories and people. And when we have moments that stress us out or we have memories that cause us to feel anxious, then typically our relationships don't go as well as we'd like them to go. And so our intention and our goal and my intention for you is to really reevaluate the memories that might have caused you pain or trauma or overwhelm or stress and anxiety and allow you to reinterpret those, create new meaning behind these memories that have caused your nervous system to be stressful in the present so that you can have more beautiful moments right now. Right now is all we have is these moments and start interpreting and creating more joy and freedom and love within these moments so that the relationships we interact with, whether it be in your career, your family, your work and your intimate relationships, they can thrive. That's what we want for everyone, everyone listening, everyone watching. I want you to feel joyful. I want you to feel healthy. I want you to have a healed life. And I want you to feel free. But we must learn the skills on how to do that. And I'm so excited that you are here, Jesu, to support us with this. In my book, the Greatness Mindset, I really talked about going deep in the moments along my own personal journey because I was extremely on the outside successful in creating results and accomplishing and working hard. But on the inside, I was struggling in life. I was struggling in relationships and I was creating breakdown after breakdown, even though on the outside, things seemed to be good. And it wasn't until the last couple of years when I really dove into intentional conscious therapy and coaching that allowed me to go back into the memories, create new meaning and rewrite the story of my life so that I have more peace in the present moment to give me more clarity about my future as well. And it hasn't been easy, Jesu, it's been really challenging actually. It's really scary to go back and face the parts of myself. that I'm ashamed of, that I'm insecure about, that I feel like I don't want anyone to know about. It's probably the hardest work I've ever done in my life. And I was a professional athlete and training and physically, but the emotional and mental work that we do, I believe is some of the hardest if we have certain pains and things that we don't love and accept about ourselves from our past. And so, In my book, the Greatness Mindset, I talked about this journey. And I wanted to break this down with you as a licensed therapist with BetterHelp, someone who's been there for six years at the company and with the brand, and really seeing the evolution of society's dealings with mental health struggles. And as a licensed therapist again with BetterHelp, how important is it taking ownership of your mental health in order to live happy, fulfilling, and balanced lives. What would you say, Hasu?

How important on a scale of zero to 10, 10 being the most important?

Yes.

11. 11. I don't think anyone should ever be blamed or seen as the person at fault for being the victim of trauma, being a survivor of abuse. However, I think we all have a personal responsibility to ourselves to take ownership of mental health, to live a happy, fulfilling, balanced life. That also looks like the acceptance that we're not going to be happy all the time. But, you know, I think we've all kind of seen and experienced this in our lives. If I don't take care of myself, sure other people can provide me with support, people can do things that are helpful to me, create a system of support around me, But ultimately, I have to be the one to take charge, to get myself out of a hole, to get unstuck from a rut. Because if it's not me, then it's not as meaningful, it's not as impactful, it's not as powerful.

So no one's coming to save us? No one's gonna just do it for us, is what you're saying?

I mean, you know, if a bunch of people were coming to save us, but we don't even want to be saved, Everyone's gonna have a hard time there. Ooh. Yeah.

And I also think that we've got to own these things. We can't, you know, there's so many people that I've tried to help, people close to my life, friends, family that I see struggling. And I want to go in there and give them some feedback, give them some coaching, give them some tools, give them some exercises, you know, a seven-day program to just get started. and if people aren't willing to dive in and do the work and be consistent with it, it doesn't matter how many people are trying to help them also. What we can do is really be the example, be an inspiration, be encouraging and supportive, but each one of us has to take ownership of these things. And that's why I think it's so important to have some type of therapy. And obviously BetterHelp does an amazing job of doing that. I'm curious, one of my favorite chapters in my book, the Greatest Mindset, is about developing and cultivating a meaningful mission. It's about getting clear on the path and direction that you want to take your personal life. It can be for personal life, for your career, for health and things like that. But what am I about? What am I up to? What am I creating in this world? And it can be for the next six months or the next six years. It doesn't have to be, what am I going to do the rest of my life? But what season am I in? And how can I get very clear on the direction I want to go in? I'm a believer that when we aren't clear on the direction we have less purpose and meaning and we're more stressed out and just kind of anxious and not sure. I'm not saying having a clear path forward is going to answer all your problems, but not having a meaningful mission is going to cause more stress and anxiety. I'm curious, how can BetterHelp online therapy help listeners and viewers really clarify the purpose for their season of their life they're in right now and really figure out how to get to the next season and the next season. What can online therapy with BetterHelp do to guide people to getting that clarity?

Big question. And before I try to answer that, I do want to let folks know that BetterHelp online therapy is an option. But there's so many different ways to find therapy. There's so many different venues. So I want folks to know that even if BetterHelp is not the right fit for you, that doesn't mean that there's no other option. And so I really encourage folks to explore, to find what works best for them. But once you've decided that you want to seek some clarity, you want to try to define some kind of purpose in your life, I think the ways that therapy can help with this is to help you start uncovering, unpacking, processing, exploring a lot of stuff that many of us have pushed away. We've done these things like repress memories or create things that some folks will call defense mechanisms to protect our feelings, to protect ourselves from very painful things of the past. We become avoidant of things that might be triggering to us. In a therapy journey, you kind of already alluded to a lot of this. It's about finding alignment. It's about finding authenticity so that the outward presentation of who you are, how you walk through this world and connect with other people, it matches your insides. That's where a lot of dissonance comes for us, is that our insides are not matching what we're doing outside in everyday life. So in therapy, we're aiming to integrate these things so we feel good about what we're putting out there into the universe.

So again, if you're looking for a clearer direction in your life, if you're looking for some healing, if you're looking for just more joy and freedom and peace of mind, then I encourage you to go to betterhelp.com/lewis. Again, you get 10% off the first month when you do that. So you can try it for a month and explore it. Check it out. You can find a therapist and you can switch, I believe, at any time. So if you're feeling like, yeah, maybe this isn't working for me, let me try someone different. You can do that as well over at betterhelp. They've got, again, online support. So if you have any questions, you can ask them questions right on the website, again, betterhealth.com/Lewis.

I hope today's episode inspired you on.

Your journey towards greatness.

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