Joel Osteen: Create Confidence & Abundance In All Areas Of Your Life! EP 1180

This is episode number 1180 with Joel Osteen. Welcome to the School of Greatness.

My name is Lewis Howes, a former.

Pro athlete turned lifestyle entrepreneur. And each week we bring you an inspiring person or message to help you discover how to unlock your inner greatness.

Thanks for spending some time with me today.

Now, let the class begin. Welcome back everyone. Today's guest is Joel Osteen. He is the pastor of the Lakewood Church, which has become the largest church in America. And after becoming the senior pastor in 1999, after his father's passing, he's grown the weekly attendance from 5,000 to over 50,000 with his sermons reaching millions of people every week across television, radio and streaming platforms. He's the best-selling author of over 12 books all focused on helping you live a greater and more purposeful life. And he's published a new book called youd you are stronger than you think. Unleash the power to go bigger, go bold, and go beyond what limits you. And in this episode, we discuss how to have confidence in yourself when you're doubting yourself. The biggest lessons Joel learned from his early childhood, how to deal with negative criticism in your life, how to overcome the feelings of imposter syndrome when you feel like you don't belong, how to think abundantly in all areas of your life, and so much more. I really enjoyed this conversation with Joel. I got some time to spend with him before and after and just really got to know him better. and it was inspiring to hear his story about how much he's overcome. And I wanted to share my thoughts after this interview. So stick around for a little solo part from me where I break down some of the things that I learned that I think will add value to you as well. And this is actually part one. We'll be releasing part two in a few weeks where we dive into relationships and marriage. It's gonna be extremely powerful. So make sure you're subscribed to this podcast to stay up to date for that episode coming in a couple of weeks. And at the end of this episode, leave a review of the part you enjoyed the most, the part inspired you from Joel's message, what he shared, his story, and post that in the review section over on Apple Podcast. And today's fan of the week from a review we got is from Holly Garber who said, I have too many favorites to list. You and your guests are truly inspiring. I listen to you on all my walks or jogs or in the car. Thank you for the wisdom, the information, and the guidance you offer. So Holly, thank you for being a fan of the week. And again, leave a review if you want a chance to be shouted out on the School of Greatness as well. Okay, in just a moment, the one and only Joel Osteen. Welcome back, everyone.

We have the incredible Joel Osteen in the house. Good to see you, sir. Hey, Louis, my pleasure.

Great meeting you today.

Great meeting you.

I feel like we're old friends already in the first 10 minutes of hanging out. I feel like we could have played basketball together, even though you're a little.

Bit shorter than me.

So we've got to get a sport.

That would be equal grounds, you know? I know. I love your work. I'll say it right off the bat. I've always been a fan and just love what you do. I love your story.

And so, man, it's great to be with you and finally get to meet you in person. I appreciate it. We've been trying to make this happen for a few years. I think the pandemic made it harder, but I'm glad we got this opportunity to help you with your book. You are stronger than you think. And I believe that in this last season of life, a lot of people don't think they're that strong at all. With all of the things that keep stacking, it seems to be against them. The relationships that they're going through, which are struggling or suffering, or people going through divorce, the job loss, the life loss, the health loss, how can people actually believe they're stronger when it seems like a lot of adversity is just keep piling on top of them?

I know, it is. It's a difficult time. And I believe, Louis, that, you know, coming from the faith background that God knows, knew everything that we'd ever face, every struggle, every disappointment, every breakup, every lonely night. He knew it and he took into account what we would need to get through it. And not just drag through it, but get through it victoriously. Now, I think sometimes we defeat ourselves in our own thinking. We think, oh, I can't handle this and the pandemic and I can't raise this children. If we have a defeated mindset, I think we're diminishing the strength and the greatness and the favor that God put in us. So, I think you have to come to me, you have to come to a point to say, okay, I wouldn't be facing this if I couldn't handle it. It may be a surprise to me, but it's not a surprise to God. See, I believe that God's, again, He knew everything about us. He knew what we were going to face. In those tough times, I turn to my faith and then I get my mind going in the right direction. Instead of this is too much, I can handle this. I'm strong. I have this greatness in me. God, you're breathing in my direction. So I think that attitude of faith helps us to release the strength.

Yeah, the faith. I think a lot of people don't know how to cultivate that faith. Was there ever a moment where you said in your life, this is too much to handle? Faith is not enough. This is such an overwhelm of stress, whether you may be a business relationship or People were just undercutting you emotionally or even your marriage. I don't know, was there ever a time where you're just like, man, I.

Don'T know how to get through this. Well, I think there were several of those times, but I think I don't know how to do this. This feels overwhelming, not denying the facts, but God, I'm trusting you. I believe that you're in control. I believe that you're still ordering my steps. So there were times, you know, my mom was diagnosed with terminal cancer in 1981, It was a difficult time. Now, fortunately, through prayer and faith, she's alive today, 40 years later, almost 88 years old. But you know, that was a dark time. And I'm not saying that faith will keep you from the adversities, but I believe it will help you get through it. And I like to think of it like this so I can give a quick analogy. Like when an architect is going to design a building, they take into account, let's say it's a high rise, you know, how much each floor is going to weigh and how much wind it's gonna face. And, you know, they just take into account. So they designed the foundation based on all the pressure and the weight. You know, a residential house wouldn't be designed with the same foundation as an 80-story building. Well, I like to think if it is our architect is God. He planned out all of our days. So he took into account what we'd face in 2021 and 2025 and all these things. And he put in us the beams that are big enough, the foundation that's strong enough. to withstand wind and pressure. I mean, when I think of it like that, it helps me to know, you know what, God, this is not a surprise to you. I've been designed to withstand this pressure. And you know, you go through it. I think a lot of it, Louis, is, you know, how we go, because we're all going to go through difficulties. How do we go through them? Do we go through them negative, bitter? I can't believe that happened. And how could this, or do we say, okay, God, I may not understand it, but I trust you. I'm going to keep an attitude of faith. I'm still going to be good to somebody. I'm still going to be my best. I think that's the attitude that we just, you know, you've heard that saying, you don't just go through it, you grow through it. You're showing God that you can handle more way, you can go further.

Do you think there's, have you met people that don't have a faith background that are able to get through things in a positive way? Like is there a way beyond faith to kind of withstand the pressures of life that may be thrown at us?

It seems like, you know, I think you can get through it, but I just think you get through it better with faith. I think people, you know, It's hard, Louis, because some things are not fair. I mean, we were doing something yesterday with somebody that's fighting terminal cancer and other things. It's just, how do you get through that? But you know what? You gotta go back to me. You have to turn to your faith, because otherwise life's not gonna make sense. And I think it's really easy to get bitter, get discouraged, and just not pursue your dreams anymore. Hey, I tried and it didn't work out. I tried in the pandemic hit, I had this relationship and it didn't work out. It's easy just to, I think you have to, again, you have to turn to your faith and believe that, you know, what's helped me is even the closed doors can be the hand of God. And sometimes I think, oh man, I want the door to open. God, I want to go further. I don't want that to close. But I think the older I've gotten, the more I've learned to trust that God, you know what's best, that I'm going to honor your, I'm going to be my best, I'm going to be good to people, I'm going to have the right attitude, and I believe you'll.

Get me to where I'm supposed to be. Yeah, and you mentioned the order you've gotten. It seems like you're always aging in reverse though. You always look younger every year. So whatever you're doing with the faith, it seems like it's working for you.

Thank you.

You know, this wasn't your intention growing up. This wasn't your dream for what you.

Were sharing with me.

Your father started the church, but you were like, Eh, I don't wanna be involved in this really.

Like, I'll hang out. But you didn't think you were gonna be on stage, is that right? Exactly. I never dreamed it, you know? So I grew up as a preacher's kid. That's all I've known. My dad was the pastor of the church. When my dad started the church, it had a couple hundred people when I was born. And so it grew to a church of six or 10,000 at that time. But so I came back from college and I started a TV outreach of the church, you know, where I put my dad's messages on television. So I loved production and editing and lighting, doing all that. I thought that's what I'd do with my life. And so 17 years I was behind the scenes at the church. And my dad would ask me to come out and speak. He said, you know, give me a week off, help me to minister. And I used to think, I wouldn't know what to say. I was very, naturally very quiet and reserved and that was the least thing. I thought I will never get up in front of people because I didn't feel qualified anyway. I'll make a longer story short. So my dad at 77 years old, he passed away from a heart attack and he preached a week before he died. So he had a good life and I should preface it by saying my dad and I were very close. We traveled the world together. I worked with him every day. We'd go to India a couple times a year. He'd speak to pastors over there. I'd take the camera and equipment and make reports. So we're very close. And I used to think, I told Victoria, I said, what am I gonna, you know, when my dad's gone, it's gonna be very different because we were so, my life was so intertwined with his. But it's interesting, when my dad died, it was, you know, the first day or so, I don't know, you know, if you've lost somebody, you're kind of in a fog the first day. you know, after he passed, I felt this desire to step up and pastor the church.

Oh, really?

Yeah, and it didn't make sense because for 17 years, you could not have talked me into getting up there. But I knew it wasn't in my mind. It was down in here. I thought, you know what, Joy, you're supposed to do this. And I felt it so strongly that, that I started speaking on the weekends. Now, everything in my mind said, you can't do this. You're not qualified. You haven't been to seminary. You're too quiet. Nobody's going to listen to you. You don't have the experience. So all these negative thoughts. And I had to fight through that. And I believe to reach your dreams, you can talk yourself out of it or you can talk yourself into it. So I would have to, you know, I'd have to look at myself sometimes in the mirror and I just, I quote scripture, joy, you're strong in the Lord. You're equipped, you're empowered. You can do all things through Christ. I had to talk myself into it in a good sense, to not let those negative thoughts defeat me. So anyway, I stepped up and started ministering.

Oh, sorry, sorry, sorry.

You're good. I stepped up and started ministry, never dreaming the church would grow. I thought if we could maintain what my dad built, we'd be doing great. And I never dreamed that, you know, people would listen to me or that I had something to say. And after about a month or two, somebody said, why you have such a gift? And I thought, I told Victory, I said, what do they mean? Because I was just talking. I was just doing this. And I just, I don't know. Sometimes, well, you have things in you that you didn't know you had. So I never dreamed I'd be here. Wow. That's, I think that's why it's easy for me to encourage people that you don't know what God can take you. And think about this, Louis. So you're a sports fan. So I'm getting, I'm jumping ahead in my story. But, you know, so we get the compact center. Yeah. To have church in now. That's cool. And so I grew up with season tickets watching the Rockets, Akeem, Larry Bird. Man, if you would have told me 21 years ago, when my dad died that one day I'd be a minister, I'd be in front of people and have books. We'd be having church in the compound. I think you got the wrong person. But that's why you don't know what kind of plan God has for your life. You don't know where He's going to take you. Even reading your story, I mean, it's so inspirational that you could have been, you know, a lot of things come against you. A lot of things that you could say, you know what, I'm sorry I didn't get good breaks, but man, you took the hand you've been dealt and you've done great things with it.

Yeah, and I think it's so inspiring. I think the adversity can either make us or break us, like you said. And for me, I said, there's got to be something greater for my life than these adversities. Not to be stuck and feeling sad about myself or what happened or what dreams didn't work out for me. There's got to be something greater. And I just said, I got to figure it out. I don't know what it is. And it took a few years of trying a bunch of things until I figured out what I didn't want. And then I started to become more aligned to service. It's like, well, how can I create something to add value? Yeah. And then how can I do it.

In a way that I like it?

You know, it works for me. I think if people learn that process that maybe you're not going to figure.

It out right away. Yeah.

It may take a little time, but have faith.

Like you said, that's the key. I know. And I think it's important what you said, because those closed doors, sometimes you have to go through your closed doors before you get to your open doors. Absolutely. And you may have to figure out what's, what's not going to work for you. Sometimes we think we want something, when we get it, we think that's not really what I want. So I think on the other side of the I believe the adversity, it's a test. How are you going to go through it? Are you going to handle it right? Are you going to still treat people right? Are you still going to have a good attitude? Or too many times we get better and discouraged. Oh great. Joy, you say there's a God, but it didn't work for me and all that. But I think you have to just keep doing the right thing when the wrong thing's happening. Right. You know, I think that's a key and just, I even think I go back to the scripture sometimes, but you know, before David What made David great? What made him a king? What brought him notoriety was defeating a giant. And so you would think, you know what, God give him a big promotion, give him something great. What God gave him was a great enemy, great adversity, something that looked too big. But David had the wherewithal to say, you know what, I've been raised up for this time. I can defeat this giant. I'm not going to, I mean the rest of the Israeli army, they were scared. The giant Goliath was taunting them. but he felt something rise up in him. So I see the principle of, you know, you have great adversities because you have a great destiny. And we wouldn't be talking about David if he had not defeated Goliath, if he had not had this giant in there. So, you know, sometimes we face giant adversities, things we don't understand, a sickness, a relationship, the business didn't make it, but just keep going forward. You never know how that's, I've learned too, forgive me for doing all this talking. You're good. But you know, all those adversities is preparing us. I mean, you can face things today, I bet you that 15 years ago, they would have probably defeated you. But you've come through critics, you've come through things that you didn't understand. Same with us. And so it's getting you prepared for where God has taken you.

And I was listening to one of your podcasts today, which if people haven't subscribed, they must. It's mandatory subscribing to right now Joel Osteen, podcast over on Apple and Spotify. You got 30 minute chunks over there. And every time I feel like, man, I just need to pick me up, I just pray any, I play any one of them.

And it's like, speaking of my soul.

You know, you were talking about the walls that we should be putting up and defending our, the negative critics that constantly try to come our way. And I always tell people this, you know, if you're doing nothing with your life, people are to criticize and judge you. And if you're doing something with your life, they're gonna criticize and judge you. So you might as well do something.

That's so good.

Either way, they're gonna tell you what what are you doing, you lazy bum? Or stop doing what you're doing because you're making me feel insecure or I.

Wish I was in your position.

How do you handle the criticism at this level? The greater the favor you talk about that God puts on you where you have the ability to impact others, the greater chance for criticism and judgment. How do you keep your mind and your soul clean of the negativity that may come your way? No matter what your positive intention or how you want to serve people.

How do you do that?

-Yeah, it was tricky. It was interesting at first because you know, when I first started ministering, it seemed like everybody loved me and everybody was for me. Then you get a little notoriety and some of that turns and when you're not hard enough or you're too soft or you're just different things people don't understand. But one thing that helped me, Louis, is my personality is to want everybody to like me.

-Me too.

-Want everybody to accept me. So, you know, somebody asked me to go mow their lawn. I'll probably do it because you know what? I just, I want to do good for you. But I had to come to the, to the realization that not everybody's going to like you and not everybody's going to accept you. And that's okay because, you know, I go back to the scripture, you know, you can't reach your destiny about without people being against you. And even, you know, you look about, you know, if you look at, from a Christian point of view, we wouldn't have salvation if Judas had not betrayed Jesus. and so a betrayal was in Jesus' destiny to fulfill God's plan. So I think sometimes we think, well, you know what? I'm not doing anything wrong. Why are these people against me? But I think you have to take it as, okay, some people are not going to understand you. They don't want to understand you. And I think sometimes we spend time and energy trying to convince somebody to like us. Right. And they're never going to like us. I think it's helped me to say, okay, there's a percentage that are not going to like you, not going to understand, and that's okay. stay focused on your race. And so what I've been good at, and I encourage people often is, man, tune out the negativity. Run your race. I believe we only have so much emotional energy each day. It's not unlimited. And I think even if I think of like this cup of water, if that's all emotional energy, man, how much am I spending for negativity, for unforgiveness, or for what that guy said, or that guy that cut me off in traffic, or the co-worker that played politics and left me out. All that energy, that water that I'm giving to that, that's energy that I don't have for my dreams and my goals. And it helped me to realize that that emotional energy is not unlimited. And so if I sit there thinking about what the critics said, or how can I pay them back, or I'm gonna get even, man, I need that to come on the School of Greatness and be with you. I need that to love my kids. I need that to go work out this afternoon. And so I just, life is too short to waste any of our emotional energy on things that don't matter. And I think, Louis, a lot of times we fight battles that are not significant. They're not between us and our destiny. It really doesn't matter what somebody said about you in one sense. Now, you know, if it's your boss or if it's, I say this, if it's not between you and your destiny, it's a distraction. And I think it's easy to get distracted. And I'll tell you, I have minister friends. I can listen to them sometimes. I think, guys, you're preaching to the critics. You're trying to straighten out your critics and everybody in your audience loves you, but you've got a letter or a tweet or from somebody that said, you didn't do this or that. And we become defensive. And I think that's even you mentioned that podcast you listen to about keep your walls up. You've got to keep things out of your heart because they're going to come. Offenses are going to come. People aren't going to understand this. They're going to do things, but you've got to keep your heart from a pure place. Otherwise, you become defensive and you start changing. And if I listen to critics, I'll be harder this way and I'll be easier this way, and you'll forget who you are. I try to tune it out.

I love that. Did you feel like you learned this from your father by watching him when he was going through this?

I think some of it, it was more, it wasn't as, the day was different in his day with social media. No, it's good and bad, you know?

You get Amazon reviews, you know, and so forth.

And you get everybody commenting on everything. so I think it was different during his day, but I did learn a lot from my father, but I think this is an area just, you know, I think naturally I'm good at being focused and I just had to say, you know what? I can tell you that I have never read of more than five seconds of negative thing about me. And I know there's all this stuff, but you know what? Life is good for me. God is good. I have a good family. I feel blessed to be able to help people and okay, Whatever the percentage when you're doing something, you know, there's gonna be 10 or 20% that don't agree, and you gotta focus on the 80 that you're helping and move forward.

Absolutely.

So would you say you and your dad were best friends as you started to get older? Were you connected pretty much every day?

We really were. My dad was 40 years older than me, so he was really like my hero. You know, everybody loved my dad. My dad was, I learned so much from him. My dad was always for the underdog. I mean, he never judged people. He's a pastor in a denomination for a while, but he didn't judge people. He no more cared if you had many, many problems or if you were not thinking you didn't live like we live, but he welcomed everybody and he was for everybody. So I learned a lot from my dad. Yeah, we were close and just, like I said, travel together and we'd go watch sports together and things like that. Yeah, so it was a lot of fun.

What would you say is the biggest lesson he taught you that you still keep with today?

I think two, if I can have two, one was the love for people. Like, I'll give you an example. Just, you know, one time we were traveling overseas and we had to stop at this little airport. I don't know, it's like a, it's like a runway, the airport was like a thatched roof type thing. It's out somewhere, like in Africa or something. My dad liked to do missions trips, so we stopped there and. you know, we had like a two-hour layover, so I was just hanging out. I was like 18 years old. And so I look up, where's my dad? He's over there talking to this, this young guy that's about 25 on sitting on the floor of the airport, like, you know, definitely a hippie and he's got his bags. And anyway, next thing I know, my dad's giving him money. And I think, okay, he comes back over and said, Dad, you know, because me, I'm reserved. I wouldn't necessarily go talk to anybody. He said, what? I said, what was that all about? He said, oh, I got to talking to him and he he got stranded here and ran out of money and trying to get back to the States and just wanted to help him out. He said something like, I'd want somebody to do that for one of my kids. And it just impacted me that he didn't know him. He probably doesn't live by our values, which is all fine too, but my dad was for helping people. And I think that's what our church was born out of. And I think that got instilled in my things. you know what? Doesn't matter where you come from, what your lifestyle is, who you are, we're for you. And somehow, kind of like what you do, let's lift people up. There's enough people being pushed down. So it was that. Second thing real quick is I saw the integrity with my father. My dad was the same in the pulpit as he was at home. He didn't get involved in shady deals or just he just lived with integrity. And I think that's important, especially in every occupation, but you know, there's sometimes just, you know, you gotta do things with the right intentions and keep your word and be a person of integrity. And I saw that with my father. I think that's what helps you to go further and to stay further. Because you know, you can go high, but if you don't have integrity and you're not doing the right thing, it's gonna catch up with you.

Absolutely. What would you say was the, you know, people talk about imposter syndrome is a thing that people talk about these days. I don't know if this is something that you heard growing up, but you mentioned how, you know, your dad wanted you to come on stage at different times and speak and you never thought that was for you. And then you started to take it over. How did you learn to kind of overcome those, that imposter syndrome feeling or mentality of like, I never went to school for this and I was never trained to speak on stages. And how did you learn to overcome that feeling?

Yeah. You know, I don't, let me see if this answers it, Louis, but it was, It wasn't easy. Let me give this example. So when my dad passed, he had been pastoring Lakewood for 40 years. So when I went up to get up there to minister, I knew every person that came had come from my dad because they never even heard me. And so I think, you know what? I gotta be like my dad. I gotta minister like my dad. I mean, it's not fair. They didn't come to hear me. I gotta lead like my dad. Well, I wasn't like my dad. My dad was more fireball, he would get loud, not screaming, but he'd get loud. He was, you know, he was- Passionate, more passionate. Yeah, yeah, and I'm more laid back. I'm just easy going and he could be, and then just the way he led, he would, my dad came out of the Great Depression, grew up very poor. So at the office, he's the last one there.

He'd turn out every light, make sure.

You know, just very- He's taking out the trash, he's sweeping the floors. Yeah, yeah, well, so when my father passed, I needed the whole week to get prepared for the message. I thought, I can't go down there and smooth with people and make sure they're there and doing their work and all that. So that was different. get past that in my mind. But the first three or four months after my dad passed, I preached his messages, got his notes, and I felt like I had to, you know, my dad sometimes would have a scripture reading at the start, and I thought, I got to do that, show people that I'm spiritual and all. But after about four or five months, I thought, this is not really me. I'm not my dad. I love my dad. I respect my dad. But I read a passage in the scripture. It says, David fulfilled his purpose for his generation.

Mm-.

And I felt like I heard something in here that said, Joel, your dad fulfilled his purpose, now go fulfill your purpose. In other words, Joel, go be you. And my gift, Louis, was a lot like yours. Well, mine's just taken a part of the scripture and explaining it and encouraging people. Help them to have a good self-image. Help them to reach their dreams. Help them to know how to forgive. Not so much the doctrine and all, and that's all good, but I think people have to learn, what does the scripture mean and how do I live it? I felt like that's what I was good at. Well, when I stepped into my own shoes, that's when the church began to grow and people started really listening. And I really think if I had not gone past of that thought of be like your dad, you know, you have to be like your dad, I don't think I would be here. I think that the principle is, is, you know, you're anointed. If I can use that word, you're empowered to be you. And nobody can beat you at being you. Nobody can beat me at being me. And that's why this talking with you is easy today because this is me. I'm not trying to impersonate or be somebody else. And I think that's where we lose a lot of power and a lot of potential is, man, I can't do it like you, Louis. You're one of a kind, but you have to see, everybody has to see themselves as one of a kind because a lot of times, you know, we're trying to copy, imitate and all that, and it's lessening our power.

Yes.

And I think sometimes, you know, if you don't realize you're a masterpiece, that you have something to offer that nobody else has, you know, we limit ourselves. We think, well, I can't do it as good as Louis, or I can't speak like this other guy. He's not as beautiful as this lady, but you know what? You're still unique in your own way. And I think the minute we think, you know, we try to copy, or even, I think another thing, if I get off course here, if you can't celebrate somebody that's a headache, I think sometimes we try to pull people down. Well, man, if you can't celebrate them, I don't think you'll get there. Really? So, I think you have to say, okay, well, they can do it better than me, but this is what I'm good at. I'm gonna keep improving. I'm gonna keep being the best that I can be and not feeling, you know, less than or not trying to cut them down. Well, you know, Louis, it's not that good, really. It's because of this. You know, that's what I think people tend to do, but rather I say, man, my first thing is to celebrate what you've done. I told you, I don't know if it's on camera off, but you know, I took over from Dad. I had a base of this. You started from scratch and built this. So man, I celebrate the success and victories in others. I think it helps you to rise higher.

I appreciate that. Yeah, and I think, you know, I remember when I started my show, I said, you know, I want to celebrate other people first. I didn't feel like I was really educated enough to be speaking in my own sense of like, I have the answers or I'm ready to teach or so let me create a school where I bring on people like you, Joel, and say, you teach and let me just put the spotlight on you and have a dialogue and a conversation and just come from a curious place from how I want to learn. And I think Oprah did an amazing job of doing this for most of her life was like, let me shine the light on so many amazing people. And the light usually reflects back and you become celebrated as well. So I think I've just said, how can I serve others? and focus on sharing their message and then, you know, good things are going to happen.

I think that's a big part of the success, even yours, Louis, is sometimes, you know, if you don't have that humility to say, and I'll be the first to say, I don't know it all. I'm learning every day. I'm learning from you and others. But I think having that humility to say, what can I learn from others? And I don't know. I think that's what allows you to grow and come up higher. but I see that in you and I can see, you know, in one sense, you know, can God trust you with more success? I'm asking a question for all of us. Can God trust me with more success? Am I going to handle the influence properly? Am I going to still be good to people? Am I going to still, you know, stay humble and keep growing and keep learning and keep using the influence for good? And I think, like you've proven that you can and I think that's why you continue to rise.

Yeah, I appreciate that and I love how you said you tried to be like your dad, which is essentially you tried to be a different identity for four or five months. And it's hard to have full confidence when we're living someone else's identity. How important is shaping our own identity when we're not confident with who we are? How do we learn to build confidence and shape our identity? Or how should we be thinking about identity in general?

Yeah, I don't know. Let me think about that, Louis. I think part of it is, you know, looking down deep and being comfortable with who you are and what you have to offer. I think maybe get off course a little bit, but not discounting yourself, not seeing somebody that's successful and saying, well, I'm so much less than that, I can never be that. And I think that's, maybe this will help some, but there was a time, Louis, that I saw my dad and he was such a powerful speaker. People loved him and he commanded the audience and all that, and even off camera and off the pulpit, he was great. And in a sense, sometimes that would intimidate me.

Really?

And I think that's probably why I shrunk back for 17 years. I don't think it was at the right time, but I used to think, My dad's so great, why would anybody want to hear from me? And so I do think that we can take it the wrong sense and let it diminish us. So I had to come back to say, and especially when my dad died, that, you know what? I have something to offer. I've been made in the image of God. I have seeds of greatness like you talk about. I think a big part of it too is, you know, keep the right recording playing in our mind. I know you talk about the inner dialogue and I think so many times it's negative. It's just, you know, I think I talked about the beginning, well, you know, I'm not as talented as my father, never been to seminary, and who's going to listen to me? And I think, you know, just in general it can be just, you know, demeaning thoughts toward ourselves. If we can change that recording not in arrogance, but it should be saying, I'm blessed, I'm prosperous, I'm talented, creative, disciplined, focused, motivated, equipped, empowered, valuable, a masterpiece. And again, I don't mean in an arrogant sense, but you need to be positive towards yourself. And I think that's how you can step into your identity and step up to who you're made to be.

Yeah, in the personal development world, they call these mantras. You know, what's the thing you're going to look in the mirror and say to yourself or when you're going through a struggling self-doubt moment, what's the word or phrase that you want to repeat to get you out of that negative space? What happens when we stay in a negative ruminating space of self-doubt, ego comparison, what happens to our soul?

Yeah, I think it just limits us. It takes it keeps the greatness from coming out and and sometimes I think it's natural to us. Because I've talked to a lot of people. I grew up very positive. My parents were positive. Joy, you can do anything. They were loving and kind. Well, it was new to me a while years ago that not everybody grew up like that. So their natural recording is, you're not good enough and we'll never be successful and we can't break these addictions. It's just a negative thing. And when you don't realize, you know, I guess the thought would be pay attention to what's playing in your mind. What are your thoughts towards yourself? What comes naturally? Maybe it's even subconsciously. I think sometimes it's negative and that's what's limiting us from having good relationships, building big businesses, and living happy and healthy. It's just, my dad used to say this and I feel like it could tie in. He said, You'll never rise any higher than the way you see yourself.

Ooh.

And I think sometimes we see ourselves, well, you know what? I see Louis great, but I don't see myself doing that. Or I don't see myself, you know, having a big church. I don't see myself successful or paying off my house. Or maybe it's, I don't see myself ever breaking this addiction. Or I just live with this depression and you got to get a right image on the insides. And now, I see myself healthy, strong, successful, blessed, helping other people get that vision on the inside.

Yes. Does Joel Osteen have any fears? I'm curious. Like it seems like you just, you know, life is so good, you're so grateful, you're blessed, you come from a service mindset, you live in service, you got a great marriage, family, like, do you ever have fears? And if so, how do you handle fear that comes your way?

Yeah, I think fear comes to us all. I'm trying to think what fear. I probably don't couch it as fear, but more like, you know, there's things that concern me, concern me, and I don't know, maybe the concern, but I just handle it to going back to, you know, times we all feel pressured or overwhelmed or this problem is not going to work out or, hey, the pandemic, are people going to still support the ministry? What if we can't pay our bills and all that stuff? I just try to come back to say, okay, God, you're on the throne. You're in control. This is not a surprise to you. So I do my best to not let the fear live in my mind. And maybe this is too religious type stuff, but I always say this, you know, don't magnify your problem, magnify God. In other words, you know, we can say, oh man, how's this gonna work out? This medical report, this situation, or you can say, okay, God, you're in control. You're on the throne. You're directing my steps. And I know that's coming from a place of faith and other people may not see it like that, but I think you can't, you don't, again, I say it this way, it takes the same amount of energy to believe as it does to worry, as it does to believe to live in fear. So in other words, I can think, what's going to happen? I'm afraid about this medical report or this, I'm afraid of this other situation. Verse, okay, God, you're in control. I'm well able, I can handle this. It's going to work out. I think you have to, you know, use your energy to believe.

Yeah, and you talk about protecting your peace and really making sure your thoughts and your feelings and your emotional energy helps you stay in a peaceful state because it's hard to grow the seeds of greatness from stress and worry and ego and envy, right?

It is.

When you have a peace calm environment, really the roots can dig in deeper. You can grow higher, isn't that correct?

That's so good. That's exactly right. And I think, and we're not saying, you know, that you can control your circumstances, because things come against us, but I think we, I know we can control what we allow to get in us. And I think that, you know, a place of peace is a place of power. You know, it's kind of like, you know, the winds and the waves may be strong all around you, but when you can be settled in your heart, you know, even Even, you know, when my father passed, yeah, I was mourning and it was kind of chaotic there, but it was kind of odd, Louis, down deep in here, I just felt a peace. Something was saying, everything's going to work out. It's going to be, you know, I just felt a peace, a kind of a rest on the inside. And so, I think living out of that place is important, because I think we're losing energy and you said it beautifully. You can't develop your potential with stress and worry, because really there's always something to be worried about.

Always.

There's always something to be stressed out. And you've heard that saying, I'll see if I can quote it. A ship doesn't sink because of the water all around it. It sinks only if the water gets in it. So a ship can be in an ocean. So let's say the ocean is fear, worry, pandemic, people coming against us. You're not going to sink because that's around you. But if you let it get in you, if you start saying, oh man, listen to what they're saying. Oh man, the pandemic. And what about my child? How's he going to get through fifth grade? And there's just so much. It's powerful when you're able to stay in peace. And really, again, from my point of view, when you're in peace, you're saying, God, I trust you. I may not understand it.

I'm not saying the circumstances are good, but I can be good in here. Yeah, I've heard you mention how when someone comes to you with a problem and they want to start sharing all the details details. You say, okay, just give me the 20 second CliffsNotes version, not the 20 minute gossip elaborate story. Is that true? You do that with pretty much every area of your life. Like if someone's bringing like their worries and concerns or you're someone's trying to read a negative review to you, you're just like, okay, I heard a few seconds. That's all I need to know.

And you don't lean into the rest of it. I do my best. Again, I want to be caring and concern and people want to share something. I don't try to cut them off. But I do think the principle is that, you know what? I wouldn't spend 20 minutes talking about the problem and all that. I mean, I tell Victoria often, you know, give me the 30-second version. Something's wrong. Okay, this is what happened. But I don't want to hear all the details, especially if it's something negative about, you know, about myself. I don't need to hear that. Okay, they don't like you. Okay, that's good. But yeah, I just think it's important to keep your your spirit, your heart, your inner person, peaceful, calm, positive, hopeful. And you can't allow all this in. And I think even now, Louis, man, with all the negative news, I like to watch the news, but after about 20 minutes, you know, I kid Victoria, because she'll go watch the news for two or three hours. And then she comes out like a different person. I said, Victoria, you're stressed, you're upset, you're mad at the world. I'm exaggerating a little bit. But I said, Victoria, turn that off. Let's go for a walk. Get your news and stuff. But I just think it's important, maybe we don't realize as much as we should of how, what we're putting in. You can't put in negative all day and see those seeds of greatness. And I think that's why people are drawn to your podcast and to your work, because it's inspiring people. We've got enough negative news. And I'm not saying, you know, deny the circumstances and hide your head in the sand. I want to know what's going on, but, man, I don't want all that.

Negative coming to me. Yeah. It's interesting. My dad used to, when we were growing up, he would. We'd watch sports together, and he would turn the commercials off anytime there was an, in his mind, a negative commercial or a thought that tried to kind of bleed into your soul of, you know, medicine commercials or you're gonna get sick or you're dying, you know, he was like, just turn this off. because we don't need to feed our mind that we're going to get sick. Let's focus on health and abundance and flourishing. You mentioned abundance a moment ago emotionally. I'm curious about your thoughts on creating just opportunities, financial abundance, relational abundance in your life. How does one think abundantly in terms of all these buckets of their life?

Yeah.

I think it's, you know, I call it taking the limits off. And so I think you have to go back to, you know, check your thinking. Are there are there limiting thoughts or restricting mindsets that are keeping you from going further? And if I can go back to my father raising the Great Depression, you know, my grandparents were good people. I didn't know them real well because they were older, but just good, loving people. but they had a limited mentality. They just thought, you know, we lost everything in the Great Depression. They worked on a farm and so my dad at 17 gave his life to Christ. He felt something big in him all of a sudden. He felt like he had something to offer the world at 17, no money, no education. He got the Christmas basket at school because they were the poorest family. So, you know, it was statistically he should have just kind of faded away. He told my grandparents that he wanted to come up and minister, go out and start pastoring. And they loved him, but they said, John, all you know how to do is work on the farm. You're going to get out there and fail. You better not leave. And they were doing that out of love, but if my father would have let that negative mentality, I call it a poverty mentality. They had a poverty mentality. This is our lot in life. We're not bad people and we're not against wealth. We just are not going to have anything. Yes. But if my father would have kept that, I wouldn't be here today. So my dad didn't have any money, but he's 17, he had to hitchhike and he went and started speaking in prisons and senior citizens homes and doors opened up and, you know, one thing led to another. And I say this, he broke a curse of poverty off of our family. And it was a mindset.

Yes.

You know, and it was just a mindset and, and, you know, I get not, because people tell them, say I'm trying to tell people they're going to be rich. I'm not saying that. Prosperity to me is great relationships, it's health in your body, it's having money to pay your bills, to fulfill your destiny, to be a blessing to others. And I don't make any, I'm not against, God's not against people having wealth and money if you're using it for the right purposes. And I think there's a mentality, especially growing up in a church environment, well, you're supposed to be poor and defeated to show that you're humble, but I don't, that's not the way I read the scripture. So I think getting back to the question is you have to take limits off of, you know, what are these limiting mindsets that have even been passed down? And maybe it's just, hey, everybody in my family gets divorced, can't have abundance in relationships, or we all struggle with these addictions, it's just who we are. We'll never live in a nice neighborhood, have enough to help others because I think you have to get rid of that. Say, you know what? I'm the one to break the, I don't know if you call it a curse, I'm the one to break the limited mindset. And I think you have to break it in your thinking first. And then I believe it opens the door to say, okay, maybe I can start that business or maybe I can, this marriage can last or, you know, like my dad, just, you know, those doors begin to open when he took the limits off.

I mean, your dad was a great model. He had a foundation, but he really didn't, he wasn't out there preaching to millions of people every week like you're doing. He didn't have the largest congregation in the world. He wasn't, you know, doing the things you're doing. Did you have a model that you got to witness someone else doing this where you could see it and then see yourself potentially doing it one day? Or how do you, how does someone see something in their mind first if they don't have the environment that shows it's possible?

I think, I don't know if I.

Had- It's amazing how you've just created this abundance in your life, health, relationships, wealth, you know, opportunities without having that model.

Yeah, I really didn't, because nobody had taken it like a compact center, but I don't know. I think that some of that was just, it was rising up in me that I knew that we were created to do something, but I think, Louis, an important thing is to get around people that have what you want. the joy, the peace, the relationships, and to be mentored and just to get in an environment. I had a friend that, I have a friend that was just living in an apartment, didn't have hardly any money for gas to go to work and all this, and just, you know, just years ago when he was young. But he came out of the environment of his family didn't have much. And he used to drive to a parking lot close to a big hotel down the road here. and he would just go into that lobby, you know, go to the hotel lobby for free. And he said, I just go in there and dream. He said, I couldn't afford to park and I have to park out in the street, but I just go in there and I dream. I look around and I think, oh, I see abundance, I see success, I see, you know, he called it God's favor, but he kind of got in that environment. And I think, I think, you know, in one sense, you can adapt to your environment. You can adapt to a negative environment. You can adapt to limited environment. So why not adapt to saying, you know what? I want to be around people that inspire me, that are doing better than me, that maybe have what I want. And I think that helps you to got to be exposed to it.

Absolutely.

I think sometimes I had a friend that, you know, he had never been out of a, you know, he lived in like the inner city, just gangs and violence. And he told how, you know, up to 20 years old, he had never been out of a five mile radius. And he thought the whole world was like that. And he said, my goodness, when they, when I went to the city, you know, the big city and I saw the skyscrapers, then I went and saw other people aren't killing each other. Other people aren't doing drugs every day. Just a little bit of exposure. Exactly. You know what? I can live like this. I was meant for more. My, my dad tells a story that's kind of corny, but it's, it's, it's funny. But it's about this frog. He was born at the bottom of this well. and you know, every day he played in the water at the bottom of the well. One day he looked up and he saw the light and he went up and he looked over the corner and he saw a lake and he thought he had all the water in the well. There he saw this lake and then he hopped a little further and he saw a pond or anyway he ended up he hopped a little further and he saw an ocean. Well, his thing was, I thought I had it all at the bottom of that well. He was happy in a sense, but I just wonder how many of us are that frog thinking that we have it all because this is how we were raised. but then you get out and you say, oh man, there's oceans of favor and abundance and joy and peace that we can be enjoying. Yeah.

My dad, I grew up in the 80s and 90s and my dad, we didn't have a lot of money growing up. He started to create more financial wealth for himself when I was older. So I lived in a small town in Delaware, Ohio, very small town. Didn't really get out much until I was about 13. And he wanted to expose us to the world. So we had, exchange students live with us from all over the world, seven different exchange students from different countries that would come with their language, their culture, their point of view, their environment, their food and everything. And it was cool to witness the world in my own little well, you know? So it's like find the ways, you know, by subscribing to your podcast or getting books like this, find ways to create an environment, even if you can't get out of your own small town right now. There's ways with the internet to create an environment of seeing other things, which is cool.

I love what your dad did. What a great thing.

It was fun. So, I've got two final questions for you before I go into those. You have so many amazing books. The latest one, you, are Stronger Than youn Think. Unleash the Power to Go Bigger, Go Bold, and Go Beyond what Limits yous. It's all about waking up to your greatness, which I'm all about. So, you have an incredible message here. I want people to get a few copies of this book. Give it to a friend or two, buy for a family member. You know, the thing I love about the way you write, it works well for me. It's hard for me to read a lot. So, you use simple analogies, simple stories that I can connect with. They're quick reads and they get right to the point of like how to step up. So, I love the way you create your content. Your podcast is such a staple for so many people around the world. So, if if people haven't subscribed, go subscribe to the podcast. You're also, I think, Sirius XM. It's 24/7. Your message is out there, right? What's the channel on Sirius?

128. 128.

So any moment you're feeling insecure or doubting yourself, go to channel 128. Your website as well has everything. You're massive on social media, Joel Osteen, but joelosteen.com has got all the stuff.

About coming to see you.

In church and Houston and all this stuff, right?

Yes, that's right. Thanks, Louis.

Thank you. You don't have to do all that.

Of course, of course. Well, people need to know, people need to be empowered, in my opinion. You've got a great way of reaching people and connecting to people's hearts that's different than me. And so, I think people need to be aware of this. And I love listening to your stuff, and I think people should at least check it out. If they have never heard about you, at least check out one 30-minute podcast. Just click on one of them and see what they think. so I think they'll love it. These final two questions are questions I ask people. Is there anything else I should mention about this or where people can go to get more?

No, it's good. It's good. Thank you.

Okay, of course. The final two questions. This one is called the Three Truths. So I asked this hypothetical question at the end with every guest. So imagine it's your last day on this earth, many years away, and you live as long as you want to live. and you accomplish your goals and your.

Dreams and you keep serving the world.

You have great relationships, all that. But it's the last day and you got to turn the lights off in this world. And for whatever reason, hypothetical scenario, all of your written work, your videos, your content has to go somewhere else. So we don't have access to your content anymore, unfortunately. Hypothetical. But you get to leave behind three lessons to the world. Three things you know to be true that you would share with the world as your message. And this is all we would have. of your message. What would you say would be those three truths?

Those three truths. Well, I'm going to make it good, Lou. I think first off is honor God with your life. Be a person of faith. Keep in first place. I think the second thing would be stay positive. Stay hopeful. Stay grateful. You know, keep that attitude of faith. And the last thing I would say, be a blessing. Lift up other people. help the lift the fall and help the hurting. You know, that's, that's in a very short nutshell. That's a beautiful man.

I love those. Honor God, stay positive and be a blessing.

Yeah.

It's powerful.

That's, that's what I'd want to be known for.

It's powerful. Before I ask the final question, Joel, I want to acknowledge you. You know, when you walked in here, I was just so glad to see you and meet you because we've been, you know, trying to make this happen for a couple years. I know my team's been connecting with your team up trying to see when am I doing a speech in Houston so I can come see you and you happen to be here for the book tour, which is great. And I just want to acknowledge you for the gift you are in the world, for the way you continue to show up. You continue to rise above negativity, nasty things that might be said about you. You continue to come from a service mentality. How could I use your gift to create something that can help other people, whether it be through your books or your sermons or your talks or your events.

You'Re serving people.

And for me, that's an inspiration. That you keep showing up consistently to serve.

You don't have to.

You could stop and say, you know, I've done my part, but you keep.

Showing up and serving. And I think that's, for me, I.

Really acknowledge you for that. And it's, it's an inspiring thing to watch. And I'd love to watch you sometime in person down in Houston. So hopefully when I come down next, we can hang out. We can play some tennis.

We're both not that good, so hopefully we can match each other well.

It'd be cool.

So I'd love to have you. Thanks for saying that about me.

Of course, of course.

Thank you.

The final question, what is your definition of greatness?

My definition of greatness would be becoming all that God created you to be. So I think greatness is different for each one of us, but it's just reaching your full potential, you know, just becoming what God created you to be, taking the limits off of yourself and stepping up.

There you go. Joel, thank you so much, man.

Appreciate it. Awesome to see you.

I hope you enjoyed this episode with Joel Osteen.

And I just loved getting to know him more. I loved hearing his story.

And quite frankly, I'm so used to hearing him speak on stage and just be so on it with his message. You know, beforehand, I was talking with him. He was like, you know, I. I write down all of my sermons and I memorize them. I work throughout the week to really memorize them so I can deliver them. and be as effective as possible as getting the message out there to people.

When they're watching me live or live.

Streamed across the world. He's got one of the largest congregations in the world, largest churches in the world. So I just thought it was so impressive how he delivers his message. I said, you know, you could give a master class on the way you communicate and how effective you communicate on stage in front of massive audiences. And so for me, it was fun to hear him go off the cuff and to answer questions and say things like, I'm not sure and I'm still figuring things out and show some vulnerabilities in this interview. So if you enjoyed this interview, make sure to leave a comment below. And if you want more of me and Joel, then just type in yes below that you want more. And I want to kind of break down what I learned from this episode.

With you about some of the things.

He shared and related to my life and my lessons as well. So the biggest takeaways from me for speaking with Joel about overcoming self-doubt and negative thoughts. You know, I've learned strategies to kind of overcome self-doubt and negative thoughts for myself. When I was growing up, I had a lot of negative thoughts. I would say things to myself internally. I would say things out loud. And it's tough because anytime you add, I am, whatever sentence you add after that, whether it's positive or negative, you really start to manifest that in your life. So, I'm an idiot, I'm stupid, I'll never be enough, I'm too small, I'm too short, I'm too you know, I'm not talented. When you start saying these things to yourself, you really start to manifest this in the physical world. And so this is something that Joel was talking about. You know, this was his dad's church. This wasn't his vision. It wasn't his dream. It wasn't his life. But he really, later, once his dad died, then he had the opportunity to say, you know what? I'm being called into this. And sometimes there's a season when we feel more confident in our life. and a timing in our life to lean into these things and other seasons that are not for us. So maybe if you're feeling insecure or doubting something, it's because it's not the right season. Maybe it is the right season, but that self-doubt and that insecurity is just holding you back. You've got to overcome it. One of the things I loved what he was talking about is really surrounding yourself with people who aren't going to speak negativity into your life. he says he stops people once he says, when they start telling him about the negative reviews or what people behind his back are saying negative about him, he doesn't want that to come into his mind and in his heart and his soul. So he's aware of it, but then he doesn't take on all the details. I think that's important not to, to be wrapped up in gossip, not to be wrapped up in gossipy news. Like, know the facts, know the facts of what's happening in the world, know the facts of what's happening to your body and to your friends and family, but don't go into the story and the details in the juicy gossip. Just that doesn't support you and your health and your dreams. Another thing he talked about is this cup. Imagine having a cup full of water every single day. And the water is emotional energy, emotional fitness. In every interaction you have with a human being that has gossip, stress, negativity, manipulation or fear, frustration in the conversation, then you lose some of that water and goes it goes down and down and down. To the words, if you're having those conversations all in the morning and then it's noon, you've got no more emotional energy. And I like that analogy that he shared there. So make sure you're stopping it so you have a full cup that you can keep yourself hydrated and not lose it all and not be pouring it all out on other people when they're when they're bringing negativity to your life. so I really like that analogy to make sure that you're constantly guarding your heart of negative thoughts, negative emotions that may be trying to come your way from peers, family, the media, news, co-workers and really just say, okay, thanks for sharing the facts and move on towards your goal, towards saying something positive and shifting the conversations. That's one thing I really liked in the approach that I would take there. you know, I was trying to connect with Joel for many years. I think it's fascinating what he's built. I think it's amazing the career he's built and how he's built it on service. And it's funny because, you know, sometimes we want something right away. I think I tried to book Joel a few years back, and we never got the timing right. Then the pandemic hit. He wasn't traveling to La. I wasn't traveling to Houston, where he's based. I didn't want to do it over Zoom with him because I really wanted to do it in person and meet him in person. And so sometimes the things we want in life will come to us when we are patient and we are playing the long game. Sometimes we want things right now. And again, maybe it is the time to do something right now. But the more consistent you are in your life and the more consistent I've been, the more opportunities keep to come coming to me. The bigger guests that we have on our show, keep coming to us the longer we stick around. When I launched first year, first two years, you know, people like Joel, it wouldn't have been as interesting for him to be on this show. Now, when we met in person and, you know, in this episode he's saying, you know, I've been a fan. I've been seeing what you're up to. It's amazing to see what you've created and how you've built this. He wouldn't have said that the first six months, the first two years, the first three or four years. He maybe didn't even know about it. the longer I've been consistent, the more I keep showing up, the more patient I am while also taking massive action, more great things come our way.

Right.

And that's what I want to say to you. Like you may want something to happen right now. You may want this big goal to happen right now, but maybe you're not ready. Maybe you still need to acquire some skills or maybe you're not emotionally equipped to handle the pressure that will come your way with these big clients or big opportunities or or the press that could potentially come your way. Maybe you're not trained enough or skilled enough, and you just need a little bit more time. So keep playing the long game towards your goals. Keep being patient. That's what I'd say for you there. Also, Joel had to realize that as he started to put himself out there and step into his greatness, into his gift, this wasn't his original dream, but he stepped into it after his dad passed away and said, I'm going to try to make something of this. I'm going to try to be of service to this community and then grow this community. He wanted everyone to like him and not everyone loves him. There's a lot of people that are big fans of him. He's got one of the biggest churches in the world, but there are also some people in the world that don't like him, that don't agree with him and for whatever reason, they're not a fan. And he shared that this, you know, kind of 25-25-25-25 rule. He's like, 25% 25% of people are going to love you no matter what. They're just going to fall in love with you. You can do no wrong and they'll still love you. 25% of people kind of like you and maybe they'll fall in love with you more and more over time, but they like you. And then there's 25% of people that aren't sure and they could not like you at one point. They could be persuaded either way. And then there's another 25% of people that are just not going to like you. You could mow their lawn every single day. You could make them food every day. You could give them money every day, they're still not going to like you. And if we can understand this kind of really approach to life, how really there's going to be a lot of people that may like you and some people that aren't going to like you, but there are certain people you can never do enough for. It doesn't matter what you do, they still won't like you. And I think that was really hard for me in the first probably five, six years of my career. because I wanted everyone to like me. I was like, I'm a nice guy. I care about people. I feel like I'm showing up for people, I'm working hard. Why would someone not like me? Why would I ever do anything to hurt someone? It's not my intention. And I remember something specific. I had an episode come out. This must have been like five years ago. I had an episode come out and someone left a really nasty comment on my blog. which is essentially like you walking into my home and you've got muddy shoes and you're just wiping your muddy shoes all over my carpet and jumping on my couch and screaming at me in my own home. This is my blog, this is my site, this is my content. Someone's coming to my home and wiping their dirty shoes all over my carpet and screaming at me. And I remember defending myself, like writing this really long reply and response and defending myself. and kind of getting frustrated back. And a coach of mine, his name is Chris Lee, who's been on this podcast many times, he calls me. Later that day, he sees this reply on my site and he calls me and he says, Louis, what are you doing? Never reply like this. He's like, you,'re just wasting your emotional energy trying to convince someone to like you who will never like you. And what you're trying to do is not going to, use that energy on people that do like you. Use that energy on helping those people that are already bought in, already inspired by your message. Don't try to convince someone who's attacking you to start liking you. That energy is going to drain your energy throughout the day. It's going to hold you back from helping more people. And there are just some people that no matter what you do, what you say, they just look at you and they have a judgment. They're just not going to listen to you. They're not going to care what you have to say. And you just have to be okay with that. And this is kind of part of life. You know, the biggest leaders in the world, you can mention all these massive names and they're going to be people that a lot of people that love them and there are going to be some people that for whatever reason will find something to not like about them. So I think his examples and his information about that inspires me because It continues to remind me as our platform grows and expands here, you can see on the YouTube comments below that there's going to be a lot of negative comments, a lot of great comments. You'll just see it below here. And to not respond, to not give your emotional energy to someone else who's hiding behind a computer and criticizing is not worth your time. So focus your energy on who are the people that do like me, who are the people that care about me in my life, my friends, my family, how can I give more to those people? and just learn to not let this affect you. It's hard to do in the beginning, at least was for me. But it was extremely freeing when I learned to let go and just understand this is part of life. People aren't going to like you. I was talking to Joel about imposter syndrome. If he ever had that and how he overcame it. I want to talk about myself as well. You know, Joel talked about when he first started, he didn't go to seminary school. He was small, he was quiet, he was shy, he was he was never cared about speaking publicly in front of other people. He was more behind the scenes. He had that imposter syndrome. But something was kind of calling him. He kept pointing here and saying something was like pulling me forward and calling me when the season was right. It wasn't calling him before for many years. When the season came, that's when he started to feel that pull. For me, I've definitely felt it. earlier in my career, I felt it a lot. Certain times in my career now, I feel it. The bigger the stage, the bigger the opportunity, I still ask myself like, wow, 10 years ago, this would have never been possible for me. So if I go back and think to myself, man, my younger self would think this is crazy. This is a dream. This is like they've got the wrong guy. But then I reflect back on how much I've actually created, how many skills I've learned, how many mistakes and adversities I've overcome in the past decade, and how much we've grown. And I think, wow, actually we've done some amazing things. I am in the right place. So that's one approach that I do. Another approach is instead of thinking like, I don't belong here, I go into a place of what do people need in this moment, whether this is a room or a conference or an interview, how can I be of service to this person? maybe they're so much bigger than me. Maybe they have such a bigger business or so much more credibility or whatever it is, a bigger platform. And I'm saying to myself, why would they want to sit and have a conversation with me? Why are they having me speak at this event? If I do that, I just think about, well, there's a uniqueness about me that no one else has. And Joel talked about that. Like, we're all one of a kind. There's something that I have that no one out of eight billion people have. And so that is meaningful. And so think of how can you share your message, your talents, your gifts with this person in front of you, this platform, this community in a way that only you can offer that gift. There might be people smarter, more talented, more successful, better looking, you know, more financially abundant than you. But what is the gift that you can bring? Is it your charm, your charisma, your energy, your passion, your love, your joy? your perspective, your experience. How can you package that information and then share it in a unique way? I think Joel talked about that as well. He said, I was not as big a personality as my dad. I felt like an imposter because my dad had this larger than life personality. I was shy, I was small. I didn't go to school for this. I didn't have the credibility. But he said, you know, I started being me on stage. I started being me in front of this audience, and I started sharing my message in a more practical way, and I didn't do as much scripture, but I just shared simple stories and more relatable stuff. And that relatability helped him spread his message and grow to larger audiences. And if he would have tried to be an imposter and tried to be like his father or someone else, it wouldn't have worked. So that's how you overcome the imposter syndrome. So, I want to talk about how my life has changed since shifting my mindset to thinking more abundantly rather than in scarcity. And in the first handful of years of starting my business and really learning how to sell effectively and learning how to create courses and programs and coaching and events and books and all these things and learning how to generate revenue. I went from a place of having no clue how to make money for a number of years to learning how to make money for a period of time. And then it started to come in after about a couple of years of figuring it out. And when I got to that place, the first few years, I was terrified to spend any money. I stayed in a small, you know, one-bedroom apartment for many years. I was, you know, I didn't have a car for a couple years. I was just like, I'm gonna walk everywhere. I didn't have TV for a few years. I was just like, I don't want to spend on any expenses. I was afraid to buy new clothes. I was just like, I'm gonna, I still bought, you know, the cheapest flights possible, middle seat, back row, buses, whatever I could for a number of years, even when I started making more and more money, because I was afraid to.

Go back to a place of, of having nothing.

And it was terrifying. So I was just in save mode of my bank account. I didn't invest anything. I just like save and, spend the least amount. And I remember I had this dream to make the Olympics and go to New York City to learn a sport called team handball. And I wanted to make the USA national team. It was a goal of mine. And then once I was on the team, have us qualify for the Olympics. And I remember moving to New York City for a month. I was like, let me check it out for a month and go to this practice where team was at that I wanted to learn from. And I remember paying this Airbnb, I think it was $2,700 a month and I was paying $495 a month for an apartment before then. So, from $495 to $2,700 in a month, I was thinking, this is insane. This is so much money. I thought it was crazy. This is like, you know, six months of my rent in Ohio that I'm paying one month here in New York City for a tiny little place. what am I doing? I said, I'll try it for one month. And within that first month, it's like opportunities and abundance started coming my way. I literally walk outside and I found money on the floor. I found $100 in the first week right outside on the streets in New York City. And I was just like, huh, there is abundance here. When I invested in myself, I started to see money literally. I started to find opportunities, meet people. I met more people in that first month going to networking events in this bigger city that I said abundance is coming my way. When I invest in myself, when I invest in a greater environment for myself, abundance will come my way. When I keep it small, when I shrink myself, when I hoard my money in my bank account and I don't actively invest it in positive growth environment, people, things like coaching, things like that, then it's going to be harder to grow abundantly. So when I started, that was like the start of the process. Okay. I remember moving after that into another apartment in New York City for 30, I think it was $3,700 or $3,900 a month. I'm thinking, this is crazy. This is so much money. But then I stayed there for a little over a year and it just continued, opportunities continue to come my way. So every time I have moved, every time I've invested in high level coaching, invested in a coach for therapy, for business, for relationships, for my health, abundance comes my way in that area of my life. So it's something to think about. How do I manage my fears? You know, I was asking Joel about this. Is there anything you're afraid of these days? You've got so many big opportunities and you've got so much going on. And I want to talk about how I manage some of my fears and the things I think about overcoming and how to overcome stuff. For me, I've talked about this many times. If this is your first time here, I highly encourage you to to do this exercise. You take out a piece of paper and a pen and you write down your fear list. So it's a list of your fears, your biggest fears. For me over the years, you know, public speaking was a fear, doing a podcast was a fear because I didn't know how to interview people and how to do the technology, writing a book was a fear, just putting my writing out there, salsa dancing, you know, all these things. have been fears of mine. So I'll take out a piece of paper and a pen and I'll write down like, okay, number one fear, the thing that makes me feel the most afraid when I think about it. If that's speaking in front of an audience where I would tremble, then that's number one. If it's learning how to salsa dance, whatever it is, writing a list of your fears, your fear list. And the key for me has always been I've got to go all in on the thing that's the biggest fear first. When I do that, it's like it builds a level of confidence because for 30, 60 or 90 days of going all in every day on that fear, it's not fun. It's not fun the first few weeks when you fail, when you humiliate yourself, when you embarrass yourself, it's not fun. But on the other side of a 30, 60 or 90 days of you going all in on that fear, you realize I'm still alive. I've learned and grown in this process. I have developed more skill of the greatest fear in the last 30 or 60 days than decades. I've created more skill in this small time period than ever before. And now I can go and take on this in the real world with more confidence, with more ease and less fear and insecurity. And this is something I'm always thinking about. What is my fear for this year? What is the thing that is holding me back. I'm always trying to grow. So these are always things I'm thinking about, but it's like, okay, going all in, investing in that skill, investing in that fear, and going from that space. That's how I do it. I really feel like you can't out think your fear. You've got to act on your fear. The sooner you do it, the better. So write down the list, the fear.

List, if you want to become fearless.

And then go all in on that fear for 30, 60, or 90 days. and see what you create on the other side.

Thank you so much for listening. I hope you enjoyed today's episode and inspired you on your journey towards greatness. Make sure to check out the show notes in the description for a full rundown of today's show with all the important links.

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