Mike Tyson: How To Overcome Your Ego To Stop Suffering In Silence & Sabotaging Your Relationships
13 Nov 2024 · 80 min
Mike Tyson talks about ego, identity, and healing from addiction and loss. He explores how suffering in silence and pride damage relationships, and what it took to move past them toward spiritual growth and vulnerability.
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Hey everyone, welcome back to a very special episode of the School of Greatness. What you're about to experience right now is actually an interview I did with the legendary sports icon, Mike Tyson. And he's got a big fight that he's got coming up with Jake Paul. And one of the things that I thought was interesting was revisiting this interview. I actually went on Mike's show, it was called Hotboxing. So this is an interview that I went on his show. but like I tend to do in most situations, I turned the interview around and started diving deep in asking him questions about his mindset, about his legacy, about how he's reinvented himself after boxing, business, and all these different things. So I wanted you to dive in deep around the mindset of Mike Tyson, how he thinks, how he started to actually heal some parts of the things in his life that were causing suffering and pain. He talks about transitioning and transforming into a new identity, into a new man. And I'm excited to see what Mike continues to do with his life moving forward. This was actually an interesting test for me. I've never been drunk or high in my life. And the entire time they were smoking marijuana in this kind of contained room. So it was actually an interesting test for me to see if I could be present while this was happening on his show, Hot Boxin'. So without further ado, Let's dive into this interview with the one and only Mike Tyson. This podcast is sponsored by Northwestern Mutual. Everyone wants to feel good about their finances, right? Well, that's why I've had life insurance with Northwestern Mutual for years. Their financial professionals ask the right questions, truly listen, and help uncover opportunities most people miss. I've seen it firsthand. Northwestern Mutual has been a part of my journey from the very beginning, providing the security and peace of mind I need as a human and an entrepreneur. Find a better way to money@nm.com, the Northwestern Mutual Life Insurance Company, Milwaukee, Wisconsin. Paid testimonial by a Northwestern Mutual policy owner.
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What do you understand about the world? What do you understand about it? And what would you say to your 20 year old self that just is about to win the title?
I was thinking about the world now that I'm one with everything. That we're involved with everything. I'm involved with the. I'm involved with the bugs. I'm involved with the ants, the butterflies, the cats, the dogs. I'm one with everything. The cars, smoke, everything. I'm one with it all.
Hey, everybody. Welcome to another episode of Hot Boxin'. I'm Evan Britton.
And I'm Mike Tyson.
Dude, we got a great guest today. We got a guest who I'm a big fan of. I heard this guy on a podcast a couple years ago, I think. And his name's Lewis Howes. Great to have you here, brother. Thanks for having me.
What's up, Louie? Thank you.
What do you call yourself? You're sort of like this new age philosopher. You're a young Great thinker.
I appreciate.
Are you all, brother?
Yes. He's written a book. Sorry, let me give you a little more intro. He's written a book, New York Times bestselling author. This book in particular that's on my mind, which is very pertinent to our show, is called the Mask of Masculinity.
Wow.
And I think we got a lot to talk about there.
It was a, it was a, a European, I think it was a, not a philosopher, but I think I know a therapist and he did the same thing with the mask of sanity. He got his name. But it was about everyday people, we were not who we appear to be.
Yeah, we put on masks. We put on this projection to try to fit in or try to make people like us or try to please people or win people over. And we were just talking about this before that you played in the NFL for a number of years and you had an identity, a mask that you wore to fit in, to be that player, right? To play the role of linemen, big tough guy, whatever it may be.
I don't want to be the tough guy, 'cause everybody, I don't care who was the gangster in the mall, they.
Respected a tough guy. That's it.
That was your life growing up. They respected you 'cause you didn't back down from them. Yeah, I was bullied when I was a kid. And I said, wow, if I was.
Like these guys that were bullying me, nobody would with me.
Right.
Nobody would put, put, put, put, put. And you became the ultimate bully of the world by destroying everyone. And here's the thing, these masks that men wear, They serve a purpose because it helps us get a result in our life. You know, I wore the athlete mask, which was, I will do whatever it takes to win at all costs. I will freaking destroy people on the field. I will train my butt off. I'll hurt myself. I won't sleep. I'll freaking do whatever to get bigger, faster, stronger at all costs so that I can achieve my goal. And here's the crazy thing, these masks work because you were in the NFL. You became the ultimate bully and we're the greatest fighter of all time. But here's what doesn't work. We are left with this sense of like, this prison inside, right? We might achieve success on the outside, but then we're prisoners and we are unfulfilled on the inside and we don't know what inner peace is. So the masks hold us back from inner peace.
And we take that out on our loved ones, the people close to us.
Everyone.
Our family, our children.
Everyone suffers around us when we wear masks.
Absolutely. So, yeah.
So that's why I wrote the book, 'cause I was achieving at every level. I was making millions, I was playing professional football, I was accomplishing things, but.
I was suffering inside. I knew if I didn't change, I couldn't have a family. My kids wouldn't respect me. I was just in that verge where my kids were not respecting me no more. Really? One was right there, the clip of.
It is so fucking frightening. Wow. How did it feel when they weren't.
Respecting, when they started to not respect you? I don't know, I felt like dying. I wanted to kill myself. Really? Yeah. I thought by having my children, they didn't respect me. I didn't want to live anymore.
Wow. How old were you then?
39, 40. Wow.
So that was a big wake up call for you? That was something that- that was pretty big, yeah. So how did you start to shift to get their respect again? 'Cause it was 40 years of conditioning.
It was so hard. It was so hard. You just had to be available, you had to come to work, you had to show up. You know, you should have gratitude.
Do you have a lot of gratitude in your life right now?
Oh, hunch. I've been beaten in submission. So I have a lot of gratitude, yeah.
Yeah. What was the biggest beatdown you've ever had? Whether it be physically or emotionally or spiritually?
I lost my four-year-old daughter. She accidentally killed herself by accident.
Oh, man.
She died on a treadmill. She didn't know how to work it and she had hurt. So after that I didn't know what to do. You know, you just didn't know what to do.
How'd you recover from that?
I didn't have it. I just know in order to make her happy, I have to do good things and be positive.
Yeah. Wow. Did you ever think positive before that moment or when you were fighting as well or was it, Always negative.
No, it was always about me. It was always about my... Everybody else. Yeah. You know, I would give people money and stuff, you know, I was capable of being kind to people, nice to people, but it didn't matter. I just wanted what I wanted, and that's all that mattered. Right.
Why do you think we care so much about those things, about like what we win or what we get? Why do you think men in general...
Because, Listen, this is what happens. Us as little kids, especially boys, what we hear, we think of great men all the time. We think of people that we heard, you hear about that guy that knocked that guy out in the corner of the corner, what was his name again? We always hear legends, we hear about Jim Brown, we hear about Bruce Lee, we hear about all these guys. And we want to know how this bad ass is telling me about these guys. I'm scared of this guy telling me about these. Guys.
Yeah.
So I want to be like these guys. For guys like this could be afraid of me or respect me or something, you know? And it's ancient.
Yeah. It's very ancient. Knights slaying the dragons.
Yeah. You know, going out on a hunt. Like Jim Brown, the football player. Yeah, he's a legend. I didn't know he was a football player from the streets. I thought he was a bad kicking in the street. I didn't know he was a football player.
I thought he was a bad.
I had no idea it was a football player till I got older.
Yeah.
That's awesome.
Why do you think you wanted respect was the thing you wanted the most from people? Because they bullied me all the time.
Everybody picked on me.
Why do you think they picked on you?
I don't know. I had no way to protect me. I know, you know, there's some people in the neighborhood that got very intimidating families. They may have 20 kids in the family. You're not gonna mess with those guys. They're very aggressive.
Yeah.
Their cousins and their brothers and everything. They're very aggressive.
So we don't bother those guys.
Yeah.
'Cause they got a family to get behind you. Yeah, you had no family to get behind you.
No family like that, no.
Dang.
What do you think about that, Louis? Why do people, what is the thing about bullying? Is it that we're programmed to gain superiority over others?
I think bullies are very insecure and they want to feel in power and they're actually powerless. And so they create scenarios to have power over other people to feel like they're in control. you know, they're very insecure. I think we've all bullied at some time, whether it be one person or a group of people or, you know, in a relationship. I think we've all are fault of it because we want to feel a sense of control or power or certainty and that lack of certainty. You know, when you're 12 years old growing up, you have no certainty. It's like, who am I? What am I doing? You know, we have no certainty.
The fact is, as we talk, really look at As we talk, Evan, when you think about it, it's these few questions. Check it out. Who are you?
No one knows when you're 12.
Where have you came from? What is your purpose? Why are you breathing? Why do you look the way you do? Who's the first you? You know, you have to make your existence. The first one, probably a million years ago, 10 million years ago. Who is he? What did he look like? Was he black, was he Asian?
Crazy, right?
We don't even know who the first us was.
Why do you think you're here, Mike?
Excuse me?
Why do you think you're here?
Why do I think I'm here? To understand the world before I die. To be lucky to understand it and be conscious of it before I die.
What would you say to your 20 year old self that just is about to win the title?
I was thinking about the world now that I'm one with everything. That we're involved with everything. I'm involved with the I'm involved with the bugs, I'm involved with the ants, the butterflies, the cats, the dogs, I'm one with everything, the clouds, the sewage, everything, the cars, smoke, everything, I'm one with it all.
What did you think back then?
Excuse me?
What did you think your understanding of the world was when you were 20?
When I was 20?
What was your viewpoint of the world?
Um, I had no viewpoint. Only thing I knew was, these guys were great champions and I wanted to be like them. I wanted to be like them.
Yeah.
It's interesting, I remember when I was a kid, when I was five, I would watch college football with my dad on TV. I would watch Ohio State Buckeyes, I'm from Ohio, small town in Ohio called Delaware, Ohio. And I would see the All-Americans on TV, my dad would get so excited about the All-American football players at Ohio State. And I was like, because my dad talked about it, that's what I wanted to be. And so my whole life became, how do I become an All-American athlete? And that was the only thing I cared about. And then when it was over, I was like, well, who am I and what do I do with my life? Just kind of like when you retired.
From football, this identity.
You know, everybody's got their own thing. Dick Butkus, all those guys had to deal with that. Yeah. Imagine being so immortal on the football.
Field, and then that stops.
Stops. And then you live in the past constantly. You can't help it. How could you not help it? Tell me that, especially in the 50s and stuff when people wasn't elevated on, after we done with this, we haven't saved up, we're screwed. If we didn't save up after the screed, we're in the gutter again. I don't care black, white, Chinese, unless somebody's such a big fan they have rich guys, I love them when I play and they gave you a job. That's what happened with a lot of those guys.
They became salesmen for the big corporations.
'Cause guys loved them when they were playing. But then the glory was over though, you know? It's the ultimate endeavor to have to reinvent yourself. Scary. Everyone has to do that.
All the time.
All the time.
Every couple of years, it's almost like you have to.
All the time. Shedding skins, letting go, transforming your mindset and your thoughts.
Yeah. What was it like for you when you had to reinvent through financially? 'Cause you went, I think you went bankrupt once or twice or, you know, how did you, Rebuild and reinvent from a place of man, I just had everything and now I lost it for whatever reason.
I had everything and next thing you know, I'm 60 million in debt. Now you owe everything.
Could you imagine, dude?
You owe everything now.
60 million.
How'd you get out of that?
Listen, right? For some reason, they thought I was trying to get out, get out to get a deal to get out of this bankruptcy. They thought I was gonna still fight, had no intention to fight. They said, nah, you gotta fight, you gotta get out of this deal, then you're gonna fight for a whole bunch of money.
And suckers.
So they kept thinking I was gonna fight and they wouldn't give me deals. And so I just, this way, I just kept paying a little bit at a time, make some money, I could pay them. And then next thing you know, I would owe them money for so long, they would say, hey, you owe us for so long, so we're gonna decline you owing us this. Because you're not paying us. You owe us five million, so now you don't owe us five million, we're gonna take seven or five million off. And so that's how I was getting down. And so they said, all right, we're gonna take this off too. And I wind up owing them two million dollars and I paid that and.
It was over, I think. Done.
Nice.
Wow.
Wow, bro.
You haven't paid in seven months. If you don't pay this in seven.
Months, we're gonna take 20 million off.
Or something like this. You never pay them. How could they do that? Are they supposed to take everything? I was living in Madison. They supposed to took all that.
How did that happen?
Interesting. I was thinking, how did I'm keeping all this? Why they're not coming to take this stuff? Interesting.
Yeah, they never came to take anything. what do you think the moment.
What was the. I had cars and stuff. I couldn't ride them because I couldn't have money to put gas in them. That Rolls-Royce didn't ride them.
Got no gas. Just sitting there.
Yeah, yeah.
That's so crazy, Mike. Crazy. Was there a moment in your life? Was it maybe the bankruptcy or when your daughter died or when you lost respect with your. Your kids? Was there a moment when, like, things really started to shift in your mind.
To say, okay, I need to figure this stuff out. I need to really. I didn't have the slightest idea. I got involved with this woman who's now my wife, right? And she has kept saying, everything's gonna be all right. We're gonna write a show. We're gonna produce television shows and movies, and this is gonna be over. I'm looking at her, and I'm still strung out on drugs. And I'm looking at her, and she's saying, that's just the news, you know. And next thing you know, we were talking about, we went and saw Chazz Palminteri at the Bronx Tale, but we saw it on stage. It was magnificent. It was so quiet you could hear a mouse on cotton. He was so captivating. You know what I mean? This guy was so captivating. Chaz Palminteri was so captivating. Everybody was so quiet you could hear every, and I said, Baby, I want to do that. Baby, I do that before, like when I go to Europe, people ask me questions and I answer the question, but this time I just want to ask the question. How do you do it? You know, I mean, theatrically, like Mr. Pomeroy and she was writing the script and we were rehearsing, she was writing the script. We didn't know how we were gonna do it. And then a friend of mine was at the gym where I work at and a guy was, Don't Mike Tyson work? And he said, yeah. He said, if you ever see him, give him my card. I wanna do a show with him.
Whoa, man. Came out of nowhere.
He's the universe. Manifesting that. Came out the universe a week later. So we called the guy. It took my wife, I think, six weeks to write the show. Wow. Her first show ever. We did the show standing room only. Knockout, blast all over the world. Knocked the country up. We did it on Broadway for three weeks.
First show in Vegas?
Yeah, on Vegas was knocked everybody. Everybody came in time, always. So one of Spike Lee's assistants came and saw the show and said, Spike, I think we should get into this. And then Spike said, I wanna go to Broadway. I was in Poland. He called me and said, you wanna go to Broadway? We went to Broadway. Listen, when we went to Broadway, everybody came, all the Broadway shows and actresses and actors came. Stevie Wonder, it's everybody came, all the actors who we did on the pan year here in California, all the people from the sets came, all the actors and actors, everybody came, was so awesome. I couldn't believe we could ever do something like that, be on that level where they would come watch us do something other than a fight, something I'm not going to get hurt doing. I did that, you know, I said, wow, I'm performing, these guys are coming.
And they're enjoying it. Mike, I've heard you talk about this a lot, but how did you feel being so honest and vulnerable about your experiences? Was that the first time you had really done that? I mean.
Yeah, kind of. But listen, it was embarrassing at first, but the people knew all this. People that was all they knew, they saw what happened in the paper, they read the paper, they saw what happened, they saw what happened, people complained about on television. So I couldn't, everybody knew what happened. So I had to be very honest. You did the eight mile move.
It was like the end of eight mile. We're just like, here's everything I did. You know, I'm gonna say it all.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Everybody knew it, but they just never.
Heard me say it.
But they all- that's the only way.
Yeah, everybody knew. It wasn't no secrets. I watched, I didn't watch it live. I wanted to when it was on Broadway, but I remember watching it on, on was it HBO or? Yeah, something like that. And my friend saw it and he's like, you have to watch this. He goes, it's one of the greatest performances I've ever seen. And I was like, no freaking way. Mike Tyson doing a one-man show. I was like, there's no way. And I turned this thing on, and I'm not just saying this 'cause you're here. I turned this thing on, and I was like, wow, you're an incredible storyteller and an incredible performer. You know, obviously you were a great performer as an athlete, but you transitioned, and I don't think anyone saw it coming that you had that capacity and capability to captivate an audience. Whether it be live or TV audience. And you did an incredible job, man.
Thank you.
Thank you.
It was inspiring. Listen, Evan, my wife, it was supposed to be a gritty, hardcore show of a hardcore guy that came up hard. It came out like a car. They laughed at my hard, tough guy. Yeah, yeah. You know, I'm talking about not having a father. The people broke, I left. So I ran back to the street. I said, Babe, what's going on? What's happening? Why are they laughing?
Why are they laughing? She said, It's called to keep it going. Keep it going.
Keep it going.
Keep it going, they're laughing, keep it going. What was the biggest lesson you learned.
About yourself after that whole experience had finished? That shouldn't be too hard on myself. You know, I should be more appreciative of what they have accomplished from where I've came from. That's amazing.
Are you usually hard on yourself?
Absolutely.
Why?
I don't know, that's all I've ever known, 'cause if I made mistakes, I got harshly, you know what I mean, verbally punished, you know, we heard some bad stuff. Yeah, of course. There's some stuff you didn't want to hear. So you get yourself numb to that by calling yourself that all the time.
I'm a loser, I suck.
What the f*** are you doing? You stupid, dumb, f***. How could you do that?
Yeah.
What do you say to yourself now? What's the conversation you say to yourself?
Oh, I love myself. I love my kids. And then your kids also, aren't you very lucky that you have your wife? what would you be without her?
Wow.
It's beautiful, man.
It's unbelievable.
Yeah.
I mean, if Mike Tyson can transform.
Yeah.
You know what I mean? As a. As a example of a man who's gone through a lot of trauma.
Life prepares you. Life prepares you for everything. Prepares you for doing 100 years in jail, prepares you for getting ready to go to the lecture chair, prepares you for death. You know what I mean?
When.
When life is enduring with you. When you're enduring with life and you're making the age limits go into your 50s, your 60s, your age, then you're making it up there, you're prepared. All your friends are no longer around, most of your family members are not around. What the f*ck am I doing here? Then we go.
Wow.
You know.
What's the thing that's prepared you the most? What experience that you've gone through do you think has prepared you the most for where you're at now? You know that old saying.
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Yes I'm dropping my ego I think my life would be disastrous if I never took the toad I took this ancient medicine to toad right and it changed my home perspective on how to look at life and how to look at people and how to talk to people.
Wow.
Do you know about the toad?
No.
Wow.
Why don't you educate him? Educate him. This is going to be very interesting. Tell me.
So you know about ayahuasca?
Of course. Yeah, yeah.
So the active ingredient in there is DMT. Yep. So the toad from its venom, which they extract and then dry it over a certain period of time, it crystallizes, it contains five neodmt, which, from the way I understand it, is DMT with an extra methyl oxy group attached to it, which makes it, like, super steroided. So, it's supercharged to your brain. So, it crosses the blood-brain barrier faster.
Wow.
And, so, you know, it does, you vaporize it and it does very much the same things as DMT, but it's It's really the top of the pyramid as far as entheogenic substances. And so, you know, people are cured of depression and addiction and, you know, are released of trauma and pain.
Right, yeah.
And so Mike-- so you did it at a very transformational time.
Yeah, plenty of times. And listen, you take this medicine, It's a possibility you may feel like God.
Wow.
And then you may have a small encounter with God and say, oh God, please forgive me. I'm sorry.
Is that what happened for you?
Yeah.
What was the encounter like?
I felt the pain of everybody I ever heard before in my life.
Wow. That sounds pain. That feels, that's fine.
Oh God, please Lord, I'm sorry. This is crazy.
You felt the pain of everyone you hurt. How many people do you think you've hurt?
Oh, man.
Hundreds, thousands, tens of thousands.
It's so amazing that pain that you could feel. It was. I had nobody. It was nothing. I just existed.
Wow.
And now you could just feel everything. You're feeling. You're saying, it's like being dead. You're vulnerable as hell. There's no ego. You're afraid of everything. Yeah.
Yeah.
Yes, please don't hurt me. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, please, I'm God, please. Wow. You know, you don't even see nobody and you're scared. You just feel, you just gotta see you're scared. I'm sorry, please. It's just, I don't understand it and I've never been the same since I did it. Wow. I don't think about hurting people, I don't think about loving people, you just don't wanna do that stuff anymore. Wow. You know, I've never been the same since that day. When my, my, Time on life. I'm talking a little faster. My time on life, I thought I seen it all. I thought I'd been everywhere. I think everybody drank, everybody smoked, whatever. I did it all. And I realized I don't know nothing and I'm nobody.
Wow.
I don't know anything. I don't know where I came from. I don't know my real name. I mean, somebody named me Mike. I don't know who the I am.
All right.
I'm just here.
Wow.
It's been pretty amazing to be on this ride with Mike, and it's just crazy amount of wisdom and insight that comes from spending time with this guy.
And I always used God as a way to be in. I was never really, I knew of God, but I always, I didn't, I was, it was always, it wasn't bigger than me.
You were the, you were bigger than God.
Yeah.
You were God.
Yeah. Yeah. thick head. And then you realize that you have to get on your knees. You don't know what his name is, but, you know, you have to worship.
Wow.
You know, after taking the toll. Yeah, he is.
Once you've been humbled a certain amount of times, then you're like, okay, I'm not God anymore. Right?
Listen, listen. I'll tell you about that. Ego. I tell you, even though you're humble, you stop. He's still there. Don't let him look at the. I might look around, look at the.
Reflections and say, wow, I'm handsome. It'll come to egos. Once you take the toll, you know he Yeah. How do you let go of ego? And how do you, what advice would you give to men who are so ego driven? What would you say to them on how to like let it go when they're so attached to it?
Listen, I'm gonna tell you something about the ego. From my experience, my, I'm nothing but just a junkyard, thug, thug of a kid, right? But my, I had nothing, I had nothing, this old Italian man gave me an ego, right? And he gave me everything I wanted. The ego gave me everything I ever wanted and more. But it took so much more in return.
What did it take?
Took everything.
Wow.
Took everything. Been in prison, took everything.
Family, love.
Yeah, well you don't care. You're almost an animal.
Wow.
You know. Oh, I'll never want to go there again.
Wow, man.
Why you wanna live like an animal when you can just say, give it up. Hey, I don't wanna do that no more. I love you.
Wow. It's amazing.
Crazy.
It's awesome.
What's the thing, the lesson you've still yet to learn for yourself to get to that next level that you want to be at? Is there a lesson or is there a challenge that you're struggling with, a question inside that still keeps you from more love, more fulfillment, impact? What is that?
Why me? Who the f*ck am I? Why do millions of people know me and think of me in nice ways? Why me? Why did I have to meet this guy? He had nothing, he had died broke. But how did he give me the tricks that he had to give me what I want? Why me? How did he know I was the guy for this job?
Wow.
I never had a boxing glove on in my life. I never thought about sports. Never played sports. How did he know I was the guy?
The universe.
Yeah. How did this guy know? That blows me away. I think this guy knows. Crazy.
What do you think the world needs more of right now? What's it missing?
Listen, I can't say I can only say love, kindness, passion, patience, you know, among each other. Look at each other as equals. You know, everyone can succeed in one particular way. We could all put, we could all succeed if we work together in any way.
So true. You know, anyway, no one wins unless we all win.
Exactly. And the conduct of one is the faith of us all. And there's billions of us on it. The conduct of one is the faith of us all.
Say that one more time. The conduct of one.
The conduct of one of us is the faith of all of us.
What does that mean for you? Huh? What does that mean to you?
That we all have to be in sync with one another. One guy robbed a store and murdered some people, that's the fate of all of us. One guy killed a guy because he's a different color, a different religion, that's the fate of all of us.
Some powerful.
Is he always this insightful? Yeah.
He is, man. I mean, and that's just really, To me, why I think I've connected with Mike so much is through my career in the NFL and coming out of it, this dissolution of ego that's taken place for me over the last four and a half years. Ego is just, it crushes you really at the end of the day. Because that's the thing that ties you into all of your desires and ideas about who you are and what you're supposed to be in this manufactured realm.
And it chases everybody that loves you away.
Exactly.
You only have your motherf***ers around you.
It's never enough.
Your ego can never have nobody you love around you. It won't work.
Why is that?
If somebody loves you and your ego's acting up and is controlling you, you can't have them.
You push them away.
You slammed them away.
No matter how much they try to.
Love you, you're just like- I can't do it. I can't do it. It won't work.
Because you're never satisfied. You're never filled. That hole is never full, you know? Not enough women, not enough cars, not.
Enough money, not enough accomplishments, press.
Not enough consumption. There's not enough to just consume and feed that thing. Feed that beast.
And that kind of sickness, if you can't have it all, you rather have nothing. Because it's not enough. It's not all of it, I'd rather have nothing.
Is that what happened to you?
I'd rather have nothing. If I can't have everyone, everything, every girl, every drug, every day, every movie star, if I can't have every one of them, all of them, I'd rather have nothing. Really?
Yeah.
How many women do you think you've been with?
I don't know. I'm not proud of it, though. Yeah, yeah. That's stuff that I'm proud of. Yeah. I don't even know why I did it. Yeah.
I didn't know what the purpose of it was.
To try to fulfill something that we were missing. No, it was, listen, I wanted those.
Women that loved me.
Why?
Because I didn't love myself.
Wow. Did you let them love you?
No way. How can I love myself? I gotta let them love me. My love was to make me. Or to tell me I was great, to tell me that was the best you ever had. That was my ego. Yeah. You know what I mean? That was my fulfillment. I would pay you I bought you a house or car. I'm the best online.
Wow.
Ooh.
What's, how long have you been together with your wife?
10, no, well, more than 10. We've been married 10 years.
What's the greatest lesson she's taught you in the last 10 years?
That I don't own her.
Did you used to feel like you owned the relationship?
I owned everything that was in my presence.
Wow.
You're around me, you're so work, I own you mother. You're around me, you're a fan, you're around me, I own you mother.
Wow.
And I own you, mother. You're around me, you're in my presence, you want anything, you accept anything from me, I own you.
You owe me, I own you, yeah. So when did she say, you don't own me? What was that like when she confronted you and said, hey, you don't own me?
Listen, let me tell you, have you ever been married?
No, I've never been married.
Let me tell you something, I'm gonna tell you something, marriage is something that, it's like a roller coaster, right? And it's really scary 'cause the roller coaster, goes up and it gets to the top and it's making a lot of noise and that's the beginning of making a lot of noise about being in love. And then we get to the top and then we come down.
Yeah.
Bath. And you can't grow, you can't learn this stuff, you gotta grow with this stuff.
Yeah.
You gotta go through it.
You can't get ready for this, you can't prepare for this. You know what I mean? You gotta find out if me and this person really care about each other. Love is out of the question that we're married. Love. Now, how about how determined you are to make this work for the betterment of your children, your name, God. You know what I mean? How tough are you? Now, you're a tough guy. I want to see how tough you are. You beat up a lot of people. Let's see how tough you are with this.
Wow.
You know what I mean? This is for God. Let's see how tough you did this for money. Let's see what you could do for God.
What's the greatest-- what's the thing you love about her the most now?
Right now that she puts up with me. Let me follow her. I can't blast the big. Can you believe we're still married?
10 years. Yeah. Wow.
And then I ran into the toad.
Wow.
Oh, man.
Toad life.
Toad life.
Toad life up in here.
Toad life. You really have to cultivate a marriage, man. I have to work.
You've been married?
Yeah.
You're married right now. You got two kids, you said, or one kid? Like a two-year-old seven-year-old wow.
Once you reach that spot where you understand, hey, we have to watch. We have to take care of ourselves. We have to make sure our side of the street is clean. I can't worry about her side of the street. Yeah.
I gotta make sure my side of.
The street is clean. That's a key. Give me. That's absolutely. I'm not married. I've never been married, but give me the. The keys to getting into a marriage that's happy and staying in a happy one.
Give me your top three each. I want to hear.
Listen, don't take anything personal.
Never personal.
If she says, how do you not take it personal?
Well, it's wrong. It takes a lot of practice. What Not wrong because the, no, it's triggers.
When they're attacking you.
No, we have triggers from other relationships and other lives. And our lives, yeah. They hit those triggers and we blame them for the, for the, for the trouble that everybody else caused us.
Because they pressed those buttons, they put.
That pain back up. So how do you not take it personally when they're like, you mother, it's a lot of practice.
You learn not to take it personally.
And you say, and it's time, I love you. It doesn't just happen.
It disarms them.
Yeah, yeah. Okay, so always coming back to I love you. I love you.
I love you.
Remember how much you love them.
I love them so much.
And remind yourself of it. And for me, it's it's about taking the energy that I bring into life because we can take our families for granted. Yes. You know, and we fall into just autopilot, you know, programmed mechanisms with our family, especially with an intimate relationship. And so over that time, like what Mike was saying, when that love or that lusty, super hot sex time wears off because it's going to, it will, because we are, as human beings, we are chemically programmed into that, especially men. You are biologically, evolutionarily programmed to procreate and spread your seed. So this is something that we have to battle or at least learn how to hone and control.
And this is what I found out too, 'cause you remember when you said, it comes a time when you still want to do it no more, and say, I'm just cool, but you still like to do it, but it's not like it used to be. That's because God prepares you to, you know what I mean? Sometimes when you're younger, it has to go. And when you get older, it's not that important.
Yes.
You don't care as much.
That's why God made it feel good.
Yeah.
'Cause even when you're older now, It's not that point, but it still feels good. I feel like I'm feeling good right now. You know?
So.
You have to come home and you have to create that romance and that love again. You have to remind her.
You have to totally lose it. She would lose it. She would pick something up. You're not, why are you not being this way? You with somebody else this way? Women pick things up, they're very sensitive, pick up things. You have to be consistent. The same thing all the time.
All the time.
Stop one time and suddenly they pick up something. consistency with women. I remember. I learned that late. To be consistent. You have to be consistent. Consistent. Never change your colors. Wow. Because they would pick that up quick.
That's the first thing they picked.
One day you change. One second.
Well, that's why communication. Second, she picks it. And they're different than we are. You see a whole bunch of people in here. If my wife was in here, we're all talking. My wife would remember here. Only my voice. Everybody's talking. She remember everything I said. Everybody's talking, but she's gonna hear my voice. That's how women are. They get tuned into your voice, everything about you, your characteristics. They want to know you. They want to be the puppet master. They just want to know what is, they don't want to be the puppet master. They just want to know every move you make.
Yeah, wow.
Yes. And communication.
Yeah.
Communication.
So that's the third for sure.
Communication. Don't take things personally.
Yeah. And we're just remember how much you love them.
Yeah, listen. Please communicate, because something that happened six months ago, and you won't know it till the outbursts come out. And you go, what the hell happened? That's six months ago.
What?
Always communicate. Is everything okay, baby? Sure, nothing's on your mind. You don't want to talk about anything? Every day, yeah. Oh, I've learned that late.
I started doing that recently, like a year ago. Yeah, that's pretty new for me. Wow. You too. Communication is just, that's a constant practice.
Evan, my whole life, once I've been married, all I did was throw money at my problems. Buy a house, buy your mother a house, buy some cars, you know, get away. I can't deal with no children today. I don't want to hear what the teacher said today.
Yeah.
But that's not what your partner wants from you. They want you to listen and be a partner.
Yes.
Yeah.
They want to know how the money's building. They want to know everything. you know what I mean? And then when you realize you don't have the money like you used to have and used to, and though those, the money at the problem, you have to deal now. Now you have to deal with the problem. And deal with the problems that's emotional. I've almost died and deal with the problem. I wish I had something to throw away. I wish I had some money to.
Give a lawyer to deal with the problem. I definitely confronted that coming out of the NFL. Oh, you know, with my wife, you know, it was like, oh, wow, now I'm here in this marriage. Now we, there's nowhere to go.
I thought, you have all this free time. Yeah. You're not just out a job all day, you know?
Absolutely. Remember one day I was in this, I said, why is it that men and women have to be married? Why is it that we look for a mate? And I tell you, a man needs a woman to make sure that he's a man. Because she'll make sure that we're a man. She'll test us and try us and push us to the extent until they.
See a breaking point.
Yeah.
You know?
Yeah, absolutely. By being a man, you have to control yourself. And that's what they teach us. Once you control yourself, you control your feelings with a woman. she said, I don't want to say submit, but she understands I can't get to him. Why don't you control your feelings? Because we don't have the emotional intelligence to control our feelings. Because in our mind, I'm macho man.
We want to react.
Oh, she's making us look like said that no man would ever say that to me.
Well, it's about when it's about when you're confront, when your woman confronts you with something she's challenging. your kingdom. She's challenging your masculinity. Big time. She's saying there's something go with for every man. I don't get big, strong biker gang.
Bang a tough killer. And with a woman, you're gonna have to deal with that. A lot of people think, I'm gonna get. I'm gonna beat love. I'm gonna get all these fellows. I ain't gonna marry.
I ain't getting.
Do you know what?
You've met a ton of guys.
Yeah.
Billionaires, celebrity. You've met the biggest. you know, influencers in the world, right? Over the last 30, 40 years. I'm curious, is there a man that you know today or in the past who's maybe passed away who feels so much love in his heart and feels like he made it without having a great partner? Like, can he do it alone and just sleep with a bunch of girls, you know, take what he wants and do these things? Can he be that guy and still be, like, peaceful and love in his heart, or is he unfulfilled?
Dig, right? My experience.
Good question.
My experience, I got a lot of stuff, women and stuff. I'm not proud of, like, the more women you, you know, you would think the more women you have, the more, more crown and achievements you will receive from people or whatever situation, the player world. But the more women you, the more women you be with, the more it's being, you feel like you've been taking parts away from you.
The hole is getting bigger.
Yeah, it feels like you're dying. The more you, they're taking from you, you feel like you're being taken, you're being torn apart, you're feeling empty, you're feeling dark, you feel like you just don't feel good about yourself.
Wow.
You just, you throw all these people and you got nothing from them but.
A.
You know, and what did you get from that feeling? Why did you want to have that? What was the cause of you having that feeling? Nobody had no, you know, maybe Three people had babies, but it was like, it comes up in the issues. What was the purpose of that field? I don't feel that way no more. I don't move like that no more. I said, what was the purpose of me to be that way? What did I get out of it? No one got any babies. We got some diseases. You know what I mean? Nobody got any love from that. What that perceived as love? What was that? I tell my wife, what was that all about?
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You think I would meet all these people in the afterlife and stuff? What's the afterlife? What about the people that watch me fight? Would I ever see them again, all of them, collectively? If all this stuff go back, where do we all go? What was like the, what you're thinking right now? Well, what am I talking about? That feeling, that energy, where does that go when we die?
Yeah.
Like you're not even talking, but that you're talking to you. Yeah. Where does that go when we die? That can't die. Where does it go? I'm just thinking, did I just black out? Like you pull out a plug socket. What happens with that?
Goes back into the circulation.
But imagine if they go into a bug or a rock or a tree and we become that.
Yeah, I'm not sure how reincarnation works. You know? Do you come back as another human being? What, you know, and why, what person you come back as?
I was telling my wife, my wife hates bugs.
Yeah.
Every now and then a bug gets in the house and she freaks out, right? I said, listen, that's probably your grandmother coming back and reincarnation. She wants to see you so bad. As soon as you have water. Wow.
You know.
I think these are people that we see.
Absolutely.
And we see them. We hate them so bad. And they say, Mike, look at me. But they said, so I'm back. I thought I was dead. Hey, Mike, it's me. I kill him.
I know, man. I have a new practice. Any bugs.
I don't kill anything.
I bring him outside. Because my wife is the same. She's like, get the spider out of here.
I'm like, baby, I'm not killing nothing. I tell that right there. I'm not killing you. You kill. I'm gonna kill. to anything.
That might be my new policy.
When do you feel the most loved, Mike?
When I feel the most love.
When do you feel the most love in your heart?
You know when? When I'm around watching YouTube and I hear my kids running around and my wife comes up and down after feeding the kids that maybe come from work and I'll come upstairs and get in the shower, maybe sit on the bed or sit on her chair, electric chair put selective vibes to a body. And I say, I'm very happy. Everybody's in the house. All my kids are here, and that's when I'm the most loved.
Wow.
We're all together. All my oldest kids, the youngest, we're all from school, from home, and all back together in the same house. I feel one love at all.
That's awesome.
Why do you think that experience makes you feel the most loved and not something else?
Because everything that I love is. I feel secured. I feel like, listen, this is a false sense of security. I feel like I can protect them right now. I can't do nothing.
Somebody can come in there and do something.
Somebody can come in and kill so with a bat. Forget a gun, right? But this is the fact, I think that they're safe now. Mm-. 'Cause they're with me. Yeah, that's the ego. I think they're safe because they're with me. Isn't that sick? And I know that's sick, but it just makes me feel good.
Feels good, yeah.
It makes you feel loved.
They're grown too.
It's an interesting breakdown of that, Mike. You took it all the way through.
I don't love them so much. I don't want them to ever, and I see, they never experience anything I experience. Just the kind of people and the things and been in prison and got bad records and stuff. They're very clean. They got good stuff. They got good beginning. I don't got with them, you know.
Well, my brother, I don't know how much time you guys have. I'm just asking some questions. But today, we all-- My, when I was, how old was I? I was eight years old. My brother went to prison for selling drugs. So when I was eight until 12, we would drive, you know, a couple hours on the weekend.
Treat you like.
It was crazy, man. Yeah, they would drive the weekend, you know, take, like, an hour to get through the security every time. And then I'd sit in this, you know, big room with all the convicts and my brother. And I was eight years old until 12. And I remember just hearing these stories about prison that blew my mind as an year old, nine year old. Just like, what happened? I'm curious. What was the biggest thing you learned about yourself from. From being in jail?
What I learned from jail, this is what I learned from jail, which is going to be a trip that there's beautiful people in this world.
Beautiful.
Yeah, there are.
There were so many nice people there.
So many beautiful people in this world. They just had hard luck or bad times and stuff. It's beautiful people. They may be killers, yeah, they may have done some really horrific shots, people did some stuff, drug deals went bad stuff, but they have a human quality about them. They're kind, you sit down, you have a different look, we have a different perspective of a drug dealer. We look for the drug dealer, he has some guns, he's coming with his pack, and a bunch of guys got their guns ready for people, for action to come and they come across a big bag, sadistic people, but that's not what it is. These are people on hard times.
Yeah.
And nobody government's not doing nothing. They're not even giving welfare out anymore. You know, this is the company where if you're not doing well, if you don't make it, f*** you. That's the country we live in. I know nobody likes to hear it, but if you're not doing good, you don't have a good family, you don't have a good education, you don't have good working skills, you're not a big strong buck, f*** you. You come back from the army, you be paralyzed, you got shot up, you're old, you can't work, can't do nothing.
You.
You immigrate, don't get no skills. How your girlfriend look? How your wife look? They're beautiful. Can I up? No. Yeah.
Wow. Yeah, but people, there are some. I've been up to Lancaster, to the Maximum Security Prison up there and done some workshops. And I did a workshop for five hours with a former NFL guy, Steve Weatherford.
I don't know if you know Steve Punter. We played together in Jackson. There you go.
Yeah, good buddy of mine. So we went up there, I took a few guys, and there was about a room of 25 murderers, right? That had all murdered. Or they were like on the scene when it happened and they got in there for life, whatever, right? And they were someone like the most lovely, kind men. Now they'd been in there, they've been doing the work, they've been working on themselves, transforming, you know, forgiving themselves. They've been in the work for years, decades. But there's some lovely people, if you're willing to train to do the work. Yeah, I know that, but listen, how.
Do these beautiful people that we're talking about, how do they get a good break when they come out there and they got the stripes on their back? They want to read your portfolio, they see this prison shit. You got the highest, some of these guys got the highest form of education from Ivy League schools, online in prison. They can't get a job. That's true. They got Ivy League stuff.
There's a guy at Stanford from there.
Yeah.
Ivy League stuff, man. These guys are geniuses. They just took the days went the wrong direction. These guys are geniuses. These guys are brainiacs. The reason why we can't have radios and stuff in prison is because one of these little crazy intelligent basketballs are turning into a phone where they can hear what in the. Wow. Warren's office, you know what I mean? So that's why we can't have genius. We can't have on the things no more, the Walkmans no more, the radios. because these guys turned into devices where they can hear in the one's office when they go send the people up for searches and lockdowns and all that stuff. These guys are Geniuses. You can't believe it. They're like Einstein. They're in there for murder. I believe it. Drugged them. These guys are so smart, they blow your mind, man. It's wild. I'm curious. Every state that the, the school requirements have for college, you know, institutions, they, they passing with flying colors, like they were. You're cheating. You think they're cheating? That's goals that they get.
Wow.
It's wild, man.
I'm curious, hypothetically, let's say you could pick the day you get to die. How old would you want to be? If you could say, okay, I can choose any day, any year, would you want to be 100, 200 years old? How old would you like to live until?
I wouldn't live long. 'Cause I wouldn't want to see my children die.
Wow.
Okay.
I wouldn't live long at all.
Wow.
That would kill me if I, you know, see him growing old. I lost his daughter at four, but imagine me with the relationship I have with my children now, you know, I would probably handle it, but I wouldn't want to deal with it. I wouldn't want to see it. I wouldn't want to die a lot earlier. Right.
Well, say you got to, say it's your last day and your family was still alive.
Yeah.
And you died. Say it was 100 and your family was still alive.
Right?
What do you think you would want people to say about you in 50 years from now if that was when you died? What would you want people to say about you at your funeral or just in life after you pass?
I don't know. I told my kids that my daddy took care of us.
Oh, yeah.
That's. It's more important. My daddy, you know, the other people are gonna have their opinion, their individuals. Yeah. Whatever it is, you know, I left the Birmingham. I told my children. Because I've always been up in that department.
Yeah.
You know, my children have to come visit me in my burr, they always have to see me in prison all the time. You know, everything. I went through that part of my life, my kids always gotta come through the glass, gotta take hang out my kids through the, ah, the worst, right?
Yeah.
Wow.
All that stuff, that's cool, man.
That's a good question.
I'm always asking myself this stuff, you know?
That's what we are as people. We want people to think something about us. That's our ego, we want to be thought of. I'm telling you, people, these eagles are so big, they want to be, they're mad they can't be at their own funeral. They want to see who came.
I think I would want something similar, which is like, I would want people to know that I really cared about humanity and I had a big heart and I wanted to help people as much as I could. And just that I was a kind human being.
Yeah, absolutely.
I tried my best to do as good as I could to help people.
You know, and then you have to deal with this. Your best wasn't good enough.
Oh, man.
Imagine that.
Well, you're dead then anyway, so you don't have to hear it anymore.
But listen, who. How do we know? Maybe. Maybe death is another form of life.
That we go to.
Another part of life. You know, how could. Absolutely. How could, you know, how could life be glorious and death not be glorious? You can't have death if you don't have life. They want to go through the hall and do it all over again. No doubt about it.
But I say to myself about that.
Too, I say, listen, is this an illusion? People are born every second. What is the big deal? Why would God need me to come back? He gets somebody, other people that keep coming. Why do we need my energy back anymore? We already dealt with your energy. We doing some new, you die unless he was coming on your stay, we don't wanna talk to you about you. We may bring you up in some history class with you. Work, okay?
Right, I think that.
I think that's a part of our ego believing that we're gonna continue to live and we're gonna be reincarnated. No, you're finished. You had your turn. Come on.
Yeah.
You know.
It's possible, but you think about like your question, Mike, of Alexander the Great and the thousands of followers, hundreds of thousands of followers he had. And you think about everybody knows Alexander the Great's name, but they don't know Joe Schmo.
Yeah.
From there. And the case is still that way. There are a handful of individuals in the grand scheme. of civilizations that leave a mark that perpetuates on and on. And so what you might think is, why does the universe want me to? Why does Spirit? Why does God want me to come back or need me to come back? And it's because you carry with you this knowledge that you spread that, like a virus, a flow of water over Humanity May touch and affect and inspire others to dream and think in this way. You know, and that's why you come back. Because for the souls that are here for maybe the first time, need to hear this type of stuff. Because it takes a lot to wake up in this day and age of technology, you know, hyper accessibility and comparison, everything.
Judgment, insecurities, everything.
Tell me this, right? How does somebody that lived in the Stone Age connect with somebody that lived right today? They died, he died during the Stone Age. Now somebody did they intertwine one of the energy and the twine with another? Hey, you're my cousin from 10 million years ago. Do we find things out? Do we receive knowledge for my death?
Yeah, because in our DNA it's all encrypted and coded into our DNA, into our cells. All of this ancient knowledge of who we are.
For my brief, you know, for my brief investigation about the toad and all this stuff and the universe, I just, it's just hard to believe that so many people are born and what happened to all these people. And like you say, say a man, say a Chinese emperor at one time, he led billions of people. And those billions of people accomplished great things. The Great Wall of China and all the great temples and all this stuff, right? Where are their names? Where are their names?
Gone.
That's a crime. Every million of them, their names should be mentioned. That's when they found the Territorial Soldiers. They had thousands of them, but it was just too many of them. But they put their names on everyone of them with different characters on them with different soldiers and they put their names on them.
That's cool.
And that's the closest that it ever came down when the whole crew got the recognition from China. When he made a clay statue of everyone in the lifestyle of every one of his soldiers and the soldiers' horses and stuff and the guns and all this stuff.
Well, in that same token of the, what did you say, Mike? The actions of us, one of us.
The conduct of one is the fate of us all.
Yes. So in the same vein, the conduct of one, Alexander the Great, is the fate of his entire community, his entire tribe.
Exactly.
You know, so he is It's the embodiment of all of those people.
It's true. It represents it.
Nobody ever went that far before. Nobody ever went that far. It must have been crazy. Imagine marching for 10 years. Imagine 10 years just keep going, not ever thinking about home. Well, you think about home, but you never know when you're coming back. They went mutiny on them when they got to India. They said, Man, we're not going home. We've been gone for 10 years. We lost a bunch of people. We got children by other women from other tribe that in our group now, you know? It's just, whoo.
That's crazy.
Yeah.
Louis, what do you have going on these days, man? What are you doing right now? You writing any new books?
I'm working on a new book that I'm just started writing. It's about eliminating self-doubt.
Nice.
I think self-doubt is the killer of dreams. And I think it holds us back from everything when we doubt ourselves.
Listen, why do we have doubt? We, human beings are the only species that make doubt up when it's not there. Isn't it crazy?
That's wild.
It's crazy. That's what I'm gonna be writing about, yes. How do we overcome that self-doubt that keeps us back? And it doesn't matter, you know, you've probably seen some talented athletes over the years who maybe they were more talented than you or something, I don't know. And you were like, but they didn't believe in themselves. And you had enough energy to put yourself out there and believe. I met a lot of guys, maybe you did on the football field. I was not the best athlete, but I made it past a lot of the guys that I played with. And I was so like, man, you're so talented. You're a mutant. You're a freak of nature. But when it comes to the game, you get scared. And I didn't understand it. I never understood it. And the thing is, it doesn't matter if you're the baddest person in the world. And if everyone believes in you and says, you,'re the greatest, you can achieve it all. If you don't believe, you'll never do anything.
This is, that's so interesting. This is something I always wanted to find out. Like I have some sparring guy partners, people that I spar, and I'm vicious, I'm like, I'm not a limit, I'm not cold, break your jaw, your eyes. And there's some guys in there that kick my, right? And you're like, what? But you put them in the ring, you put them on the- They're nervous. You put some popcorn there, and they panic. Won't throw a punch, I said, yeah. Fight him like you fought me in the- no, it's fight him the same way.
Please, this guy's gonna kill him after he's dead.
And they freak out, this panic. They won't...
I think part of it is, this is something I'm gonna be researching and going down. I think part of it is our ego and opinions of other people. We care so much about the opinions of other people, the way we look, if we fail, if something happens we're not proud of, we're so scared of what our friends, our family, the media thinks of us, that it holds us back from actually being in flow. and giving our all.
Absolutely.
That's true too. There's other things that in that realm, there's some guys that don't got, ain't got nothing, talk, pump, cough, and there's guys that got the world, they don't do nothing to shy to introvert it. They don't think much of themselves and they're scared to talk to girls. Now why is that? Now if you talk about self-doubt, you- the insecurities, yeah. You're scared to talk to a girl. I know. I would buy one.
No, forget to, I'll take this money.
And buy a car.
Yeah.
People are trillion.
I think the reject, the fear of rejection. It's like the opinion of what that person thinks of you. If they don't, if they say no to you, then it means you're not worthy. And at the core of all of our fears is us not being enough. It's saying I am not enough. And therefore I'm afraid of, of putting myself out there. Because what if this person says, you are not enough to me. I'm rejecting you. Then we get scared. and our ego takes over and we don't want to be put in that situation.
In some cases, people killed other people for saying that.
Absolutely. Yeah.
People freak out.
And isn't it interesting that you could have the world saying, you got this, you're the greatest, and you not believe in yourself and not take up the opportunity. And in the reverse, you could have the world against you and everyone says, no, there's no way you can do this. There's no chance you're not good enough and all it takes is one person to believe and that's yourself. And when you can be against the world, but if you have the belief, then you can go and create it. And so that's what I want to.
Absolutely.
This book is about developing self belief and over and eliminating self doubt because I think self doubt is a killer of dreams.
I used to have a mentor and he used to say this confidence applied properly. we'll supersede a genius.
Oh, yeah.
Genius without confidence isn't gonna do anything.
Yeah.
It doesn't matter.
Amazing.
Yeah. So I've got that.
You should interview Mike for it, dude.
I'm going to. I mean, I'm going to. Yeah, for sure. I've got that. I've got a documentary I'm. I'm looking to launch here soon.
That's about.
It's called chasing greatness.
Nice.
It's all about discovering what greatness is, and I'm excited about that. And then my podcast is called the School of greatness. So we interview people like Mike, who's going to be coming on soon.
And the telephone. I'm gonna say something that John Kennedy Jr. Said. All right. I've known him well before he died.
Right.
And he said this. I met a lot of great men.
But.
And all those great men I met. I never met, there were no good men. And he said, after meeting all these great men, I decided I want to be a good man. And that's what I said. I said, I want to be a good man. People told me I was great for a long time, but it didn't give me, you know, as I got older it didn't mean anything to me. You know what I mean? And then I realized that being a good man It's, you know, it's worth more than being a great man. Well, great men are not good men, but most good men could become great men.
Yeah, that's true.
So true.
That's great.
So true. Because that doesn't give you anything. No. All of the material success, it doesn't do anything for your soul. You may get five minutes, five years of gratification, for your achievements, but it's not going to fill the hole unless you're at peace with yourself. You are in love with yourself.
Listen, we're human beings. We're, you know, we're human beings. Imagine. How do you take your great man? How do you take that? Why do you say, I'm a bad. How do they take that? You know, from a perspective of Humanity. How do you. How do you take. You're a great man.
I just try to say, I don't.
Even know what that means.
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If someone says that to me, I would just say thank you. I'm trying to do my best every single day. I'm learning every day. I'm growing. I'm not perfect. I just want to help and serve. So I just try to focus on service. And I say thank you, I'm just trying to serve as much as I can.
Like my idiotic, I thought of a great man's a man like Gandhi, a man that gives up all his money, gives everything to something. But that don't make him a great man. That's this man don't give a f*** money. But that don't make him a good man either. You know, he just value, he has a price, but his price is not money. Might be sex, might be liquor, might be drugs, or he just might be as happy you know what I mean? And all happy people are not good people. You know what I mean?
Yeah, you can be doing bad things and feel happy about it.
Yeah.
Well, happy people are not good people.
Good stuff, man.
This is fun, guys.
It's really good when you see somebody that's in a bad situation and you try to make that situation better.
That's a good person.
That's a good person. you don't have to know him or anything, but to make a situation better.
And all you could do, you could simply smile.
Yeah.
You don't have to do a lot to change someone's energy and make them feel better. You can smile, you can 100% say, how are you?
You know?
Yeah.
It's just your energy, your way of.
Being, how you show up. So there's a lot of homeless people around LA.
Yeah. You live in LA?
I live in West Hollywood.
West Hollywood. There's a lot of people too, yeah.
Yeah. And on my side of town in NoHo, North Hollywood.
Hollywood.
See in Hollywood, but Hollywood, they got the functional homeless people. They're still clean, they're still not talking.
They got cell phones.
Yeah, these guys downtown don't have nothing. They're gonna die there, man.
Yeah, it's really bad. But, you know, I try to acknowledge them, at least. That's good. You know, I feel like those people are so beaten down that if another soul can just acknowledge their existence that lifts them up to some extent.
That's true.
Just smile and say, hey, I hope you're doing well.
Hey man, you know, God bless you. Good luck to you.
I don't understand.
Listen, it's funny you say that. It was a story about Alexander the Great and it was this guy forgot, a genius. I forgot his name, but it was a homeless guy. And he never complained. He was always happy. And Alexander was the king of Greece at something. He wanted to, he said, hey, listen, I notice you, you have nothing. You're always happy. I have everything. What can I do for you? And the guy said this, he said, For once, if you can please just get out of the way of the sun so I can get my tan. And Alexander just couldn't understand why this guy had nothing but he was happy. And he had everything and he wasn't happy. That was confusing.
It's interesting, I've been a part of a charity called Pencils of Promise where I'm actually tonight, I'm flying to Guatemala.
Wow, dude.
Every year I go on a trip, we go to Guatemala, Laos, and Ghana, and we build schools. It's cool there. I like it there. But we go and build schools. I've been doing it for seven, eight years. A guy named Adam Braun founded it. Scooter Braun.
Yeah.
He's part of his brother.
I don't know if you know Scooter Braun.
Cool.
We do. Yeah, yeah. So I'm going tonight and every year I go on a trip for about four days and I see these kids that have nothing. They're in the middle of, they're so happy, man. They have nothing. They have no schools. They have no why. They have a hut. But then they get a little sandwich and they're just hanging out with their family and they're kicking a soccer ball on the dirt field with, you know, you know, trees in the middle of the field. And they're, you know, they're so happy kicking a rock around.
Well, they don't expect anything. In this country, we were taught to expect things. Even if you don't work, we expect to have that beautiful girl. We expect to have that house. We expect to have that money. Someone to give us money.
Yeah.
Someone to give it to us.
They're so happy. And so when I come, when I'm there for four or five days and I come back and I drive through Beverly Hills to get to West Hollywood and I see it's grotesque. This, the material abundance and people honking in their $400,000 Bentleys or whatever and getting mad. And I'm like, these people are so happy with nothing. They've got family, they've got laughter, they've got health and people in Beverly Hills, not everyone obviously, but I see people that are angry and I'm frustrated. Cosmic joke, man.
Isn't it crazy?
No, this is crazy. People are so fragile. Life is fragile. It's hard living life. You see people, they say they make a bad mistake, they think it's over, they may kill themselves. Life is hard to live.
Yeah.
By making them say, oh God, I'm never gonna get no money, I'm never gonna get my girl, let me know it's gonna love me, boom, I'm dead.
You know, it's just people, it always passes though, right?
Yeah. You've been through some crap.
Yeah, but you have to go through it. Some people can't go through the rain.
It's a lot of pain to go through. Deal with that pain. It's a lot of pain.
Deal with that pain.
And you have to be willing to.
Always see It's so hard when you feel like you're suffocating though.
But it's just your mind playing tricks. It is.
It's all mind games.
It's a mind game. We're so human beings are so drama filled. We're movies in our own selves.
That's it. Stories we tell.
We listen to, it's not even true when we're playing. We got the emotions, we cry. It's cool. It's over, it's gone, it's cool.
Good, man.
Well, this is fun.
What do you think, dude? We have a ball in here.
This is a great conversation. It's a great- I'm excited to have you on soon and just talk more about this stuff.
Hell yeah, dude.
Do you ever think about that? Where the f*ck am I gonna go when it is over? I know you don't think it's a blackout boom.
I know you and the sun's gonna-.
I think about it every day. Yeah, you do. Because it's kind of exciting too. Be honest. What's next? It's exciting. Because, you know, God didn't make us for us to blank out. Do you think God made us for us to say, hey, it's over, blank out, we don't exist anymore. Come on. I don't think so. The galaxy is so big. I think sometimes that we're in somebody's dream. No, we're in somebody's system. We're at guts, we're cells.
We're cells.
We're living inside somebody that's just so big we can't even fathom it. Why not?
You know?
Why not? Well, we stop being afraid, we're ready to die. Isn't that crazy? That's the paradox. We're ready to die. Even when you're young, we're no longer afraid.
You usually die.
You know.
Interesting.
Fear keeps us alive. Fear is a friend of ours.
You have some realization.
Yeah.
And then you go. Should we wrap this up?
Sure. Why not?
Do you guys have a special ending, too?
No.
Oh, thank you.
This is awesome.
It's beautiful. Big Mike.
Hope to see you again.
Appreciate you, man.
Thank you.
It's beautiful meeting you, man.
Mike. Amazing episode.
Brother.
Hey, wait, where can people find you?
Yeah, tell us.
@Lewishowes, L-E-W-I-S, H-O-W-E-S, and on Instagram or wherever, and then School of Greatness podcast.
Awesome.
Check it, y'all. Why do you think we put greatness and wealth in the same category? I don't do that.
Well, you know most people... Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, I think it's... That's what I thought, too. I think they think of like wealth and success. the reason why for me it wasn't called School of Success, because I think that word is, I don't know, it's just not used that well. It's tied around money and accomplishments where greatness for me is not about money and accomplishments, it's about service. It's about how can you use the sacrifice?
Step up to your highest self.
Yeah, it's about how can you use the gifts and talents that you were given, that you were born with, to cultivate them and pursue a dream that you have. And in that pursuit, how can you impact the people around you, the maximum number of people.
For me, that's great. What do we do about homeless people? What do we do about having homeless hotels? Imagine a hotel like Vegas, like the MGM Grand, a 5,000 room hotel. Imagine something like that for the homeless. And as they go in the hotel, they learn how to take care of the hotel, they learn how to handle it, take the people, they learn the bellhop, they learn the administration, they learn all that, and then they build more.
Hotels all over the world for homeless people to learn how to make live their lives. It's a great concept if they have the responsibility and want to do the work and want to show up and work. That's the challenge. Man.
Well, we'll have you on again and we'll go deeper on success and greatness. I think it's awesome, man. I appreciate it, man.
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