The Light Switch Analogy

Are you caring for a loved one with dementia? You don't have to figure this out all on your own. Welcome to Truth, Lies Alzheimer's, the show that helps you reimagine a new relationship with your loved one, a relationship a little more free of stress and anxiety. Join host Lisa Skinner and her 30+ years of experience as she guides you on a new path to a better relationship with those you care for. Here's Lisa.

Hi everybody, welcome to another new episode of the Truth, Lies Alzheimer's Show. I'm Lisa Skinner, your host. Today I want to talk about what it's like what it's like to live with Alzheimer's disease and related dementia, what it's like to walk in the shoes of somebody who is progressing through cognitive decline. I strongly believe in the 30 years that I have been working with families that one of the most important things that we can do to help us get through it, to help them get through it is to understand what their new worlds look like and how the, the damage being done to their brains changes their perception about everything that goes on in that new world. So that's today's topic, and so, uh, let's get to it. In a person living with dementia, The ability to perceive things the same way we do, those of us living with healthy brains, diminishes and will affect that person's judgment both visually and conceptually. Their level of confusion increases over time because they are losing the ability to make sense of what their senses take in. Consequently, this can produce many adverse reactions, such as a flight, which means to run from the situation, or fright, be scared, and/or combative behavior. And they will eventually fall back on instinctive raw emotions when reacting to any given situation. The brain is the center of our thought processes and is therefore central to our lives. It takes in information from our daily experiences and enables us to make sense of our world. Our memories are the threads that sew our lives together in sequence and continuity. However, when our memory begins to fail, the tie to our life unravels, resulting in nearly a complete loss of oneself. The first memory problems that typically occur with Alzheimer's disease are with the short-term memory. The person has difficulty recalling the events that have happened most recently But their long-term memories can remain intact far into the disease, sometimes for the entire length of the disease. So I used to lead some support groups, and a lot of the attendees would tell me that Oh, all of a sudden, just out of nowhere, my mom starts talking about something that makes absolutely no sense to me. She's talking about things from the past. She thinks her mother's still alive. And this was a very confusing thing for family members and caregivers. They didn't understand why the— all of a sudden they would just switch from being in the here and now to being in the past. So I came up with an analogy to help people better understand and be able to relate to what is happening to an Alzheimer's brain as it progresses through the stages of the disease that would make sense of why this does occur. And it does occur. It's very, very common. So this is the analogy that I created, and so many people have told me that, ah, I finally get it. So think of a person's short-term memory as having a switch attached to it that can be turned on and off, just like a switch that turns a light on and off. When that switch is turned on, the short-term memory is functioning normally. But when that switch all of a sudden flips off, the short-term memory malfunctions or short-circuits, and then that person with dementia must pull from their long-term memories in order to put their life into a perspective that makes makes sense to them. Remember, their long-term memories stay intact. This happens because the, the long-term memories are all that's available to them once that short-term memory switch flips off. This sends the person back into a different time period of their life. Now, that is typically temporary until the latter stage of the disease. But regardless, it becomes the reality of their world that they are living in until that short-term memory switch flips back on. It's almost like they are living their life in reverse. But not necessarily in the same order or continuum that they did during their original growth years. In the beginning stages of dementia, our short-term memory switches on more than it's off. In the mid-stage of the disease, it switches from on to off from on to off, from on to off, without any warning whatsoever. And then by the end of the disease stage, that switch is off more than it's on. It is not uncommon for that switch to go off permanently, so the person with dementia will be left with no recent memories and become stuck somewhere in their past. So we, as family members and caregivers, will have to listen to the cues they're giving us based on what they're talking about in order to determine what period of their life they have just traveled back to. Are they asking about their young children? Their parents? Their jobs? Things that they are referring to that couldn't possibly be recent because they're too old for those things to be recent. They have gone back to another time period in their life. And then we can practice what's called "Join Their Reality," which I'm going to be talking about in future episodes, how to manage it when this light switch analogy that flips their short-term memory off and how to effectively communicate when that happens. So as you can only imagine, a person experiencing lost memories may feel extremely confused when the world as they knew it starts disappearing and their past and their present collide. Again, this can elicit feelings of fear, anger, anxiety, as well as unleash uncharacteristic behaviors in that person. Confusion can be triggered by lost trains of thought, mixed up memories, or a sudden change in the environment, even a change from one caregiver to another. And what we in my world call reminiscence therapy, which you will also be learning about, can help people cope with the loss of their core selves, another common occurrence of people living with dementia. It's because our memories keep us plugged into the work and play of our lives, what we do and how we do it. It allows us to understand how we fit into the social fabric because our memories store key habits, beliefs, and values that make us unique and vital. But once those memories are lost, We lose ourselves. Sadly, dementia profoundly affects a person's ability to keep their world in a proper order and therefore impacts the way they live in that world, as well as how they get along with others in it. Most people then become confused when a situation goes beyond the limits of their new thinking abilities or limited thinking abilities. Thinking abilities. Then, as the disease progresses, the mind's ability to avoid confusion declines because we lose the normal filters and protections that we once had when our brains were healthy. Also, our normal thinking abilities allow us to control our emotions. Help us adjust our responses to things, helps us judge the difference between something happening in our life from being a big deal to— or a little deal. But with dementia, that ability is gradually lost altogether. So you will learn to put your Sherlock Holmes hat on, and through the process of elimination, Learn to identify the underlying triggers that surface through behaviors. You know, there are so many aspects of living with dementia that are unexpected and can surface out of nowhere at any time. I call these the hidden or secret faces of dementia. And as many of you already know, they show up unannounced and are completely unpredictable. And that's why it's so important to be prepared for anything that shows up on your journey through the dementia world. The knowledge I share with you will eventually become your superpower to negotiate the many challenges that you inevitably will face having a loved one or caring for someone with dementia. And one of the core principles that I teach is called a person-centered approach to dementia care, and I'm a certified dementia care trainer in this arena. This focuses on each individual as they are experiencing living with Alzheimer's disease and dementia, as opposed to focusing exclusively on the disease. Because each individual person will experience the disease differently, it's extremely important that we learn to adjust our care and communication strategies to each specific person. This will enable us to create a care and communication plan that is customized to the specific needs of each individual as they progress through the different stages of the disease in a way that is effective and compassionate. When a person living with dementia can no longer communicate with us, to have their wants and needs heard, they will find alternative ways to do so. And this typically manifests in a way of a variety of behaviors that we see every day during the course of the disease. And it's up to us to recognize these behaviors as being their way of trying to tell us something but we're the ones that are going to have to figure out what that something is. The most common association that people make with Alzheimer's disease is that people who are living with it can no longer remember things and they become extremely confused. Well, that is true. Memory loss is the hallmark of Alzheimer's disease and related dementia. However, The scope of the disease and the way it affects people is far more complicated than just memory loss and confusion. The brain of people living with Alzheimer's disease, or one of the other brain diseases that causes dementia, is changing rapidly. As the disease progresses. So consequently, the changes that are taking place go unrecognized as being part of the disease. For example, some of the more common behaviors that we can expect to see are wandering, delusions, constant repetition of questions, stories, or habits, not recognizing loved ones, becoming very suspicious as well as paranoid. Over the course of my show, we will continually take a look at why these behaviors occur, how you can recognize them, learn what triggers them, and then most importantly how to effectively react and respond to them so these situations do not escalate into more serious situations, or how we can— and how we can create our— a harmonious existence for everybody involved, and how we can realistically provide our loved ones with a higher and more dignified quality of life. I want to thank you for being here with me today and learn all you can about how we all can live well with Alzheimer's disease and related dementia. It doesn't just affect the people who have the brain diseases, it affects all of us for a very long time. But there are many effective tools that you will learn about that can help decrease a lot of the stress that accompany this, this disease, and that can help you take the guesswork out of many of the situations that will inevitably arise. So we have lots to cover in our upcoming episodes. Information that will hopefully enlighten you, empower you, and will make life easier to bear while trudging through this journey. It's all going to be based on being prepared to adapt to their new world instead of hoping that they can still adapt to yours. Remember, dementia awareness happens every day. And kindness is the ability to speak with love, listen with patience, and act with compassion. These are all very necessary attributes to have to outlast this heartbreaking disease. So that's what I have to share with you all today. Thanks again for taking the time to listen in. And be here with me. I hope that this was— it revealed a lot to you of what people actually go through when they are living with a brain disease that causes dementia. It's very complicated. So I hope you all have a great rest of your week, and as always, I hope that that you are happy and stay healthy. And we will be back next week for another new episode of the Truth, Lies Alzheimer's show with me, Lisa Skinner, your host.

Thank you for listening to Truth, Lies Alzheimer's. We hope you found something in today's episode that helps. We understand that caring for Caring for a loved one with dementia can be the challenge of a lifetime, but you don't have to do it alone. If you're ready for exclusive access to even more great content and resources, head on over to Facebook and join Lisa Skinner's Minding Dementia support group. We're a community of like-minded caregivers, and we're here to help.