In this episode of the Truth, Lies Alzheimer’s Show, host Lisa Skinner draws on her 30+ years of caregiving experience to guide families on how to involve a loved one with Alzheimer’s disease in holiday celebrations. She acknowledges the emotional conflict caregivers face—balancing cherished traditions with the risk of overwhelming the person with dementia. Skinner advises assessing the loved one’s disease stage to determine how much change they can tolerate, limiting visit length, and closely monitoring for signs of anxiety or confusion. She emphasizes keeping the environment familiar, calm, and sensory‑rich (using favorite scents, music, and simple activities) while avoiding noisy, cluttered, or overly stimulating settings. Practical safety recommendations from the Mayo Clinic are provided, such as toning down decorations, using electric candles, and securing the tree. The host also stresses caregiver self‑care, setting clear limits with family, and being flexible to adapt plans as needed. Throughout, she encourages creating meaningful, low‑stress memories and invites listeners to join her Minding Dementia support group for additional resources.
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Are you caring for a loved one with dementia? You don't have to figure this out all on your own. Welcome to Truth, Lies Alzheimer's, the show that helps you reimagine a new relationship with your loved one, a relationship a little more free of stress and anxiety. Join host Lisa Skinner and her 30+ years of experience as she guides you on a new path to a better relationship with those you care for. Here's Lisa.
Hello, everybody. Welcome to another new episode of The Truth, Lies Alzheimer's Show with me, your host, Lisa Skinner. And today, because this is holiday season and Christmas is right around the corner, I want to share some tips, recommendations, and advice for everybody. If you are thinking about including your loved one who is living with Alzheimer's disease and related dementia in your festivities, because we all know that the holiday season is that special time of year for us to celebrate with our family and friends through sharing and laughter and creating lifelong memories. But getting everything done on time, as we all know, can be extremely hectic. Many families struggle with the decision as to whether to include a loved one who is living with Alzheimer's disease and dementia in the festivities. They ask themselves and torment themselves with the question, "Is this a good idea to bring them along, to bring them over to my home, or am I really setting myself up for a potential disaster?" Now, a person living with Alzheimer's disease will often feel a special sense of loss because of the changes in their behavior due to the disease. Families and caregivers sometimes feel overwhelmed by trying to balance the maintaining of traditions with the stress of caregiving. To me, having counseled thousands of families over the last 30 years, I have found that it's not only a difficult decision to make, but it's also a very difficult question to answer. And I think that we have to kind of look at it on a case-by-case basis because every person living with dementia experiences the disease differently. So we really need to take into consideration how the disease is impacting your loved one and how a change in their environment might affect their personality and their moods. The holiday season can also cause the mixed feelings for a family affected by Alzheimer's disease or dementia. While typically a time for celebration, families may experience a sense of loss for the way things used to be. And for caregivers, the holidays may create added work that requires extra planning, extra preparation, and careful communication in consideration of the needs of a loved one with dementia during holiday decorating and gatherings. But holidays can also be enriching times for both you and your loved ones diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease, as well as family and caregivers and friends and relatives. Family traditions provide a feeling of belonging and identity. It's a link with a familiar past that can be quite reassuring for a person living with Alzheimer's disease. However, holiday celebrations, which may include a mixture of other people can cause confusion and anxiety for people living with Alzheimer's. Some situations may be easier and more pleasurable than others. So it's all about finding balance in the busy holiday activities with the special care that will be required for your loved one coping with the symptoms of Alzheimer's disease. So here are some tips. Most people living with dementia, and we've talked about this many, many, many times over the course of Truth, Lies and Alzheimer's, they do better with routines and with familiarity. So here's a tip: keep them in familiar locations that are free of noise. That's free of being hectic, that has too much clutter and will cause them to feel stress. An overload of stimulation can trigger emotions that can escalate into a potential catastrophic reaction that you might not be able to manage. Other tips for coping with the holidays and Alzheimer's disease could include determining what stage your loved one is in, in the progression of the disease. Now, if your loved one is in the early stages of their disease, it's often much easier for them to cope with a change in their environment versus a person in the mid to later stage of the disease. As the disease progresses, the person living with dementia becomes more and more confused and less able to understand what is happening around them. They can also become easily agitated and/or frightened in a world that no longer makes sense to them, and they may rely on their instincts of fight or flight as a response to these surroundings. So if you decide to include your loved one, you may want to limit the amount of time they visit with the family. If you notice any changes in their demeanor, such as they all of a sudden become nervous, they're full of anxiety, they become irritable, or a sudden change in their level of confusion. Those are telltale signs that they are not coping well with their current environment. You can also pay close attention to their body language and demeanor to determine if they are increasingly becoming upset. You should have a dedicated family member or caregiver be with your loved one at all times. During this festive occasion, to watch for signs of distress, and to keep reassuring them that they are safe and that you will be taking them home shortly. Also, what I have found is that you need to take charge and set your own limits. Be clear about them with others. You do not have to live up to the expectations of anybody, of your friends or your family. And as a caregiver, understand your situation is very different now. You need to find time for the holiday activities that you like to do, like taking a walk in the neighborhood to see the holiday decorations or baking cookies. Taking care of the caregivers is also a very important way for us to celebrate the holidays. Some additional tips that you'll find helpful to be mindful of if you are including your loved one in your holiday celebrations. This can be a wonderful way for us to create meaningful memories. Even as they navigate the challenges of Alzheimer's disease. So keep it simple. Opt for a calm and cozy environment. Large gatherings— and I can't understate this— or loud noises can and will be overwhelming. Smaller gatherings may be more appropriate for your situation. If possible, bring your loved one to familiar spaces where they may feel comfortable because this will help reduce their anxiety and confusion. Choose a time of the day when they are usually more alert and less fatigued. For many, this might be mid-morning or early afternoon. Engage in their senses. Use familiar scents like the aromas of holiday foods, music that they would recognize and identify with, decorations that may evoke positive memories. This can help them feel connected to the celebration. Keep conversations with everybody who is in attendance Simple. This is very important. Engage in light, easy conversations. Avoid complex topics that may confuse your loved one. Share happy memories or stories from their past and involve them in the activities. Simple activities like decorating cookies, folding napkins, or looking through photo albums can help your loved one feel included without it being overwhelming to them. And I want you to prepare for confusion by being patient and ready to reassure them that if they do become confused and anxious, you'll have a quiet space where they can take a break. This may help diffuse that situation. And limit the duration. Don't keep your loved one there too long. A couple of hours may be sufficient, allowing them to enjoy the moment without becoming fatigued. When you live with dementia, you lose sense of timing. So 5 minutes could seem like 5 days to somebody with dementia. So just, that's a little bit of an exaggeration, but They do tire easily and become bored easily and become anxious easily. If you're bringing your loved one home from a care facility, make sure you inform the staff about your plans. They could give you insights or suggestions based on for recent behaviors and needs. And then prioritize their safety. Always ensure that the environment is safe and free from hazards, and also consider any dietary restrictions and ensure their comfort. Try to capture the moment. Take photos or videos to help create lasting memories, not just for your loved one, but for the family as well. Always be flexible. Be prepared to adapt your plans based on your loved one's mood and behavior. If they seem overwhelmed, it's okay to cut the visit short. And then here's some tips, useful recommendations from the Mayo Clinic, in mind for holiday season during preparation, planning, decorating, and celebrating. By creating an appropriate environment during the holidays for the person with dementia, you will create a safe and calming space. So one of the ways to do that is to tone down the decorations. Avoid blinking lights or large decorative displays that can cause confusion. Avoid decorations that cause clutter or require you to rearrange a familiar room. Substitute electric candles for burning candles. If you light candles, please don't leave them unattended. Avoid fragile decorations or decorations that could be mistaken for edible treats, such as artificial fruits. And if you have a tree, secure it to a wall. And then this is something that is really helpful to play familiar music. Familiar or favorite holiday music may be extremely enjoyable for people living with dementia. It can trigger wonderful memories. Some of them might even remember the lyrics to the songs from their past. But adjust the volume so it's relaxing and not overwhelming and causing distress. Finally, by being mindful of your loved one's condition and creating a supportive environment, you can help your loved one enjoy the holiday season while also making meaningful memories with your family that will last you your lifetime. So those are the holiday tips that I have for you this holiday season. Thank you for joining me here on The Truth Lies in Alzheimer's Show. I'm Lisa Skinner, your host, and I will be back next Tuesday with another new episode of The Truth Lies in Alzheimer's Show. And I hope you all have a wonderful, happy, and healthy week. Till next time, see you then. Bye-bye.
Thank you for listening to Truth, Lies Alzheimer's. We hope you found something in today's episode that helps. We understand that caring for a loved one with dementia can be the challenge of a lifetime, but you don't have to do it alone. If you're ready for exclusive access to even more great content and resources, head on over to Facebook and join Lisa Skinner's Minding Dementia support group. We're a community of like-minded caregivers, and we're here to help.
