Lynne Levy explains how the inner critic paralyzes product managers and keeps them from leadership. She offers six tactics: notice the voice without judgment, shift perspective by asking what you'd tell a friend, change your physical state, ask forward-looking questions, take one small step daily, and seek external support.
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Lynne Levy from the Inspired Product Leader Program. So today I wanna talk about the voice, that inner voice that tells you that you're going to fail. The inner voice that says you are going to be stuck as a, just a product manager for the rest of your career. So let's talk about ways really to combat that voice. Again, it's that voice that just replays that awkward conversation that you had with senior leaders. And you just remember their confused or frustrated looks on their face. It's the voice that knows everything about you and somehow just takes pleasure in reminding you of every flaw that you have. It's the voice that says you're never going to be a product leader. It's the voice that says how disappointed they are with you, that you haven't excelled in your product career. That voice is what we call the inner critic. Okay? And the good news is we all have one. We may not talk about it, but we all have one. And the most dangerous thing about allowing this inner critic to hold us captive is not that it's impacting our life or ruining it. The risk is that we end up wasting our life where we stay in a job where we're unhappy. Where we settle for working in an industry that doesn't inspire us as a product leader. The problem is we spend time wasting our brilliance and our skills. And when we're paralyzed with fear and self-doubt because of all the inner things that nasty inner critic says, time goes by. And before we know it, we're 50. So you are meant for more. You are meant to do great things. Okay? Maybe you're unsure how to break the cycle of that inner voice. Maybe you're just frustrated. That's okay. Let's talk about ways to get rid of that inner critic. Okay. First one is just accept it. So many people say, all right, I've got to just fight the inner critic or I need to deal with it. Again, everybody has this critic, no matter how successful they are. It's just part of being human. So the first strategy is just notice it and accept it. Don't make it right or wrong. Okay? Just notice and accept it. Then I want you to shift your perspective. Your internal critic is like almost like a magician on stage. It just shows you one perspective. Okay. However, I want you to step outside of the stage, see what is— what looked like magic is actually just a bunch of clever mind tricks. Okay. So one of my favorite, favorite strategies for dealing with this inner critic is to pull myself basically out of the audience of the inner critic and shift my perspective. So two things, two ways to do this. Say to yourself, all right, what is really going on and where are these thoughts coming from? And then lastly, what would I tell a family member or a friend or one of our children if they were dealing with this inner critic? As soon as you notice and accept that the inner critic is talking, fire back with these questions. The inner critic is going to fight back for a while, but the better you get at asking these questions— what's really going on? Where are these thoughts coming from? And what would I say to a friend or family member? Okay. The sooner you ask these questions to yourself, the more effective you will be at managing this inner critic. All right. Strategy number 3, move your body. Okay? Change your physical state. Stand up, walk around, hold your shoulders back, go for a run, exercise. Your emotions and your physiology work hand in hand. You can't force a smile and not feel good. Okay. In fact, this is kind of crazy. If you just smile for a second, your body actually, the stress response will be reduced. Okay. So once, once you've shifted your, your physical and emotional state, now let's go to the next strategy, asking better questions. I don't know why. But it seems like the default questions that inner critic serves up are always negative. What if my product fails? What if I look for a job and I can't find one? These are all just weak questions. They're just worst-case scenarios and they create this downward spiral of doubt. So I want you to ask better questions. What if my product succeeds? What if I stand up for myself and start to be seen as a leader? What if I land a promotion in that fabulous job? Notice how much better these questions feel. The next strategy is just to take one step forward. Your inner critic loves to put you in spin cycle or analysis paralysis. One of the ways it does, one of the ways it does this is to get you thinking about step 10 or step 20. It's gonna get you focused on long-term negative, negative items. So another tool to silence this critic is take one step, just one small step forward every single day. What can you do to get unstuck? What can you do to move forward? So the reality is you deserve to do what you love in the world of product management. You deserve to have a quiet inner critic. You just deserve to wake up every day on fire. I'm a firmly believe— firm believer that we are meant to live on purpose with purpose. So if you need support or you need some help putting together a strategy to become unstuck, schedule a call with me and we'll build a strategy. It's a complimentary call and I'm here to serve you in quieting that inner critic.
