078 Finding Richness in Your Story & Your Life With Jude Charles

Hey there, real quick before we jump into the episode, listen, if your earnings treadmill hasn't set you free yet, running faster won't either. Listen, hustle without principles just going to burn you out. So here's what I want for you. I want you to join me for my money machine experience live. It is three free trainings. Deep dive into how to escape the treadmill and build a money machine that actually works for you. All right, Grab your spot here by going to moneymachinelive.com and I'll see you in the free training. Oh, my God. I'm not even sure how to describe this one. This.

Episode is incredible. It is a must. Listen, a must watch my guest, Jude Charles.

We, we walk down this whole path of what does it take to live a richer life? Here's a guy who's the youngest of 10 children who from an immigrant family, from a Haitian family that came in. The first entrepreneur started at age 17 because one person in his life believed in him, but he was doing it wrong and he hit the wall. And so many entrepreneurs, we call them treadmill entrepreneurs, they hit the wall. What did he do to recover what is important? How do you use story and your journey to connect with your clients at a much deeper level? And what I think it does is it scales your distinc. It scales your value, which ultimately scales your profit and scales your wealth in the process. But the more important thing is it scales the way you live your life at a richer, deeper level. I think you're going to enjoy this episode. I want to hear from you. Enjoy it. I'll see you in the episode with Jude Charles. Cheers. This is the affluent entrepreneur show for entrepreneurs that want to operate at a high level and achieve financial liberation. I'm your host, Mel Abraham, and I'll be sharing with you what it takes to create success beyond what wealth so you can have a richer, more fulfilling lifestyle. In this show, you'll learn how business and money intersect so you can scale your business, scale your money and scale your life while creating a deeper impact and living with complete freedom because that's what it really means to be an affluent entrepreneur.

Judy, it's so great to have you on, on the show. Part of this. This is cool for me because we just literally just met, but I feel like we're on parallel journeys, kindred spirits. I might have a few years on you, but we're good. And I want to start this off with a story since you are in that place of bringing stories to life. But I think that it Hits home with some of the things that you've been through and I've been through. And I. I was having a conversation with a gal at the time that I was dating, and it wasn't a good conversation. And so I got off the phone. I was angry, and I did what most. Most guys would do. Let me go to the gym and let me work this out. So I hopped on a bike, and I was riding as fast as I can down a hill as as much as I could because I wanted to coast on the uphill side. And just as I hit the crest of the bottom of the hill, not only was I at top speed, but my shoelace got caught in the chain, and.

Doing something you're not supposed to do, I clipped the brake, which meant my bike ride turned into a flight, which was totally fine except for the landing. And that landing put me on my head and ended up with a grade four concussion where I couldn't speak. I was stuttering. I had no feeling on the right side. And the day after I got out of the hospital, a dear, dear friend who we call each other brothers comes over, and he says, I'll take you to lunch now. I'm in a neck brace, and he takes me to the pastrami shop. And as we sit down, he stares at me, looks me in the eye, and he asks this question, and he says, how much is enough?

And I hope people ponder this as we go through this, because I looked at him going, dude, I just hit my head. I just got out of the hospital, and you want to ask me philosophical questions? He says, no, seriously, how much is enough? Because here's what I know. You got on that bike.

You. You rode angry, you rode distracted, you rode distressed. And the reason you were in the hospital was because of that. And it's because you don't know where your finish line is. You have no idea whether it's behind you, whether it's in front of you, how far in front of you it is. And if you don't know where that finish line is, here's what I know. You'll heal yourself. You'll go back, you'll get back on the bike, you'll ride again. You'll be distressed, you'll be distracted, you'll hit burnout, you'll hit breakdown, and you'll crash and burn again. So how much is enough?

And I want to start with that, because I know that that is something that you wrestled with, too.

Yes.

And I think that's an interesting place for us to have a conversation. Especially when we're trying to figure out this idea of affluence and living a richer lifestyle, which isn't material things and money necessarily. It's about the. How we experience life.

Yeah.

I have a similar experience where I Woke up on October 10, 2020.

My eyes were open, my teeth were clenched, my heart racing.

But I could not physically move my body. Wow. Two hours later, when I called the therapist, I was later diagnosed with burnout. So, yes. How much is enough is because that question's so important, because you're going to continue to go through the same cycle over and over and over because you've never stopped to think, to be intentional about when is enough enough.

Or why does this keep happening? So I love that you started with that because it's. Especially when we talk about affluence, it's an important question. I.

Started this business that I'm in now. It's a video production business at 17 years old today, I'm 33 years old. So 16 years later, the one thing I never changed was how I work. It's part of the reason why I burnt out. But again, I think the question is important. Not only how much is enough, but the cycles that keep happening, why do they keep happening? Right.

There's patterns.

Yeah, there's patterns. There's patterns. So, yeah, thank you. Thank you for bringing me on and sharing that story, too. But there's patterns. And until you can recognize the patterns so you can change the story that's in your head.

Means nothing.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Well, and here's the interesting thing. I think, you know, I don't know what the experience was with you, but a lot of it was it actually had to start here. It had to start here in our head. We had to. We had to see life and think through life differently. Otherwise we were gonna. Like you said, you're gonna repeat it. And my guess is that you ended up on that day, waking up that way because there was a history of how you approach life, how you saw life, how you thought about life now. And I don't know.

For. For those that are listening or watching, you know, you're a family. You're the youngest of 10.

Yes.

An immigrant family. You know, you. You are the only entrepreneur in your family. So, I mean, it wasn't like you were following in someone's footsteps. This was something that Jude created.

Yep. And I.

I created it out of fear.

So I mentioned the physical manifestation of my burnout was in 2020. Course, during the pandemic. But I continued working throughout the Pandemic. So while everyone else between March and July were at home and, you know, working from home, I continued. I was one of five people on an airplane traveling to my clients. And the work that I do, I create documentaries for entrepreneurs. That means I have to be on site filming with them. And I had two clients at the time who were still working. Stephan, Georgi and Darnell, Jervy Harmon. Stefan was in San Diego. Darnell was in Delaware.

They couldn't be further apart.

They couldn't be further apart.

And you're in Florida, and I'm in.

Florida, but I'm still traveling to go see them, to go work with them while I don't even know what's happening. Like, what is what will happen with the rest of the world. The reason I said it was out of fear is because I started my business in 2006. Two years later was the 2008 recession. And I remember what it was like for six months not to make $1. And so when the pandemic happened, in my mind, it's like, oh, this is going to happen again. I need to prepare for this. And while my clients are still working, I need to bring in as much money as possible because I don't know when the other shoe is going to drop. And so when you say it starts in your head. For me, it was definitely in my head that I was afraid, although I had no reason to be. But I had created this cycle of fear. Now, for me, mindset. I had worked on my mindset because I failed. My first five years in business, I struggled to make $20,000. So from 2010, 2000, between 2010 to 2020, I had worked on my mindset. But mindset is a muscle, right? And unless you continue to work that muscle, there's atrophy.

And it was only after going through therapy and going to see a therapist that I realized, oh, man. Between 2018, 2019, I stopped working this muscle of mindset. I got a little too comfortable.

And so I had to go back and reinvent myself, really reprogram the negative thinking that I had incorporated, the fear that I had incorporated that honestly didn't need to be there. Right.

It's so incredible how that will just creep in if we don't stay vigilant at the doors of our mind. I mean, we really need to.

Yeah, absolutely. And for me, it was one, seeking help. So going to see a therapist and going through that, I think the second was getting back to a regular exercise routine. So I exercise today, every day, even if it means Just going outside for a walk for 30 minutes.

But the third one was really the most important key. So I talked about. I started the business at 17. Between 17 and in my 20s, I prided myself on how I work.

And that I could hustle and just do as much as possible. But I'm now in my 30s. The way I used to work in my 20s doesn't work for me anymore. So I had to change the system in which I work. We talked a little bit about this before, but I only work Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday. So Friday to Monday, I have the time off to do anything outside of work. But also I take every June and December off every year. I had been doing November, December since 2013.

But again, that was in my 20s. And I realized I would go from January to October, and I would race and I would burn myself out. By November, I take a whole month off to just decompress. And then finally in December, I'm like. I finally feel myself again. Well, what I work through with my therapist is that instead of waiting all the way to November, take June and December off. Yeah, right.

Yeah.

The system in which I work, the system.

It'S not necessarily that I was the problem or that. Or that I was doing something wrong. It was the system that was no longer working for where I wanted to be. And so, yeah, today I changed my systems, and I'm still very much in burnout. I'm still learning. But the process in which I work.

As we're recording this, it is July, and I've just come off of my sabbatical. It is amazing. I feel amazing in the middle of the year, because January to May were stressful. I launched a book in February, and there were other things that happened, but I got that break in June, the full month to be able to breathe, reassess, reanalyze, and then come back refreshed.

I think, God, this is so good. So good. I wish that I would have learned a lesson.

At your age. And I get that you're sitting back saying, look, I'm a work in progress. Sometimes it's more work than progress. But we're still working progress so much. But the level of awareness is key. I mean, it's so huge. And the word that kind of comes to me is that because I look at your whole. I look at your whole world, you know.

Is boundaries.

Yes. Yeah.

You know, you have boundaries, you know, specifically how you want to work, who you want to work with, you know, specifically who you want into your. Into your. For those of you. And we'll hook it all up in the, in the notes and everything that. And you all should be. We'll talk more about what, what Jude does. But judecharles co he.

I remember going there saying, I want to get on your email list. And I'm thinking, I'm just going to opt in. No, I had to freaking apply. And like, I go, are you? I'm applying to get someone to send me emails. And I felt this tug of, what if he doesn't accept me? What does that say about me? And I'm like going, wow, you know, and just. But I see how you curated and orchestrated and say, look, this is going to protect the richness in my life. This is going to protect my being. This is going to keep me away from the burnout that I experienced. And this is going to allow me to live life fully expressed.

Yep.

Yep.

In those two months that I take off, the newsletter also takes off. Right? Like, I don't write the newsletter within those two months. This past June, I did experiment with. All I did is reshared podcasts that I had been featured on. But I don't. Everything is off. My team doesn't work. At least they don't work for me during June and December. Like, everything is off. And.

I think to your point, it's curation. I think it's just intention, too. We don't give ourselves enough credit to choose. You get to choose. You get to choose what you listen to. You get to choose who you follow and what you follow. You get to choose how you work. And I think for me, it's always been about choice. My father has since passed away, but he used to work seven days a week. He retired at 69 and enjoyed the last five years of his life. But that was only five years.

Right?

So I always looked at. And I think that was the benefit of being the youngest of 10. I always looked at, hey, I have a choice here.

I could go down this path, but I've seen everyone else go down that path. I don't necessarily like that path. So what's my other option here? What do I do? I used to work at a grocery store. My very first job was at a grocery store.

I was probably 14, 15. And I remember the cashiers were in their 30s and 40s, and they would come into this grocery store and complain every single day about coming to work. And I was like, I don't want to do that. I want to choose where I work and how I work. And then I want to. If I don't like it Anymore. Change it. Right. December 2021, when I took my break, I went to a cabin in Asheville and I completely unplug in December. So June, I'll slow down work and I may not do any work, but December, I completely unplug. No social media, nothing. No, I don't spend time with family and friends. I just completely unplug. I'm dead. Stimulating myself from everything. Well, December of 2021, this past December, I came up with the idea and something I'm going to follow through with. By 2026, I will be 37 years old. I'm going to retire from video production completely. Close the door, walk away from it. At that point, I would have been doing it for 20 years. But that's a decision I made for myself.

Yeah.

Just being intentional because I no longer. Not that I no longer enjoy video production, but I do understand that video production brings a lot of stress in the way that I work with my clients. And not only that, the bigger idea, the bigger picture is that there's so much more to me than just video production.

Yeah. I don't see you as a video production guy.

Right.

Oh, my gosh.

So that's. But it's the intention. Yeah, it's the intention. It is. I have a choice. What am I going to do with that choice? That's what every morning that I wake up, I just try to remember that what am I choosing today?

This is really.

I think it's important, it's interesting because I think there's so many people right now that actually feel that they don't have choice, that they can't live intentionally and that they're there doing what they've been told to do, what society has told them, what their degrees told them, what social media has told them, what circumstances have told them. But we always have choice.

Always. Even if you work a 9 to 5, right now you're working in a career, you have a choice to change that career. As a matter of fact, because of the pandemic, there are more people today that have choices to work from home. I have seen stories of people who, who have given up 20 grand, a 20 grand promotion because there's certain companies that's trying to get their people to come back to work and they're like, we'll give you 10 grand more, we'll give you 20, and they don't want it.

Yeah, yeah.

So today, now more than ever, you have a choice as to. Because I think we've seen what the ramifications of this pandemic have Been. And it's like we crave connection more. We crave choice more. We crave working from home because instead of driving for a total of two hours a day to work and back, it's easier to work from home. Even if the kids are there, it's easier to work from home. And so now more than ever, we have a choice. There is. That's one part of it. The other part I want to mention too is that now more than ever we have a choice. Because there are more options to make money now.

Yeah, there are.

Right. So the idea that someone else is forcing you or something, some illogical thing is forcing you, imaginary thing, that's no longer an excuse anymore. In 2022, as we're recording this, you have a choice.

Yeah, yeah.

You choose.

I think we have the, the opportunity to make money in more ways than we ever did. The boundaries or the, the barriers to entry are lower than they've ever been. Our access to reach and people is greater than it has ever been. And then the key component there, which I think leads into some of the stuff that you do, is truly connecting with people at the deepest level. You mentioned that we're craving connection.

It's all fun. And back in the day. Okay, this is not something you're supposed to say because then all of a sudden you're aging yourself. But I was a single full time dad of my son and I pulled him out of daycare so he could be with me at home. And I raised them, you know, there. And in that house that we were in, I put my office. So I started working from home back in the 90s before, you know, and I had an office, but I didn't go there very often. And then I put a gym in. So I would get up, I would work out, I would work, we would, you know, I'd take them to school. I did all of that. And then there was this, there was a time there where I had so much angst because I go, I feel like I'm living in a compound. I don't see anything, you know, I don't see anyone. It's all done and confined in here, you know, and, and I, you know, I had to get out. And I think that, yeah, people are starved for that. And you, gosh, you know, one of the things that, that really excited me about one, getting to know you too. Some of the stuff you do is how you help people bring their life to life in other people's lives in a way that gives value, scales value.

And allows them to feel Because I think that when we bring it out authentically real, we're congruent, we're aligned, and it is you now fully expressed. And those that are attracted to you connect at a much deeper level.

Yeah.

In 2011 might have been 2010, actually. I sat at the edge of my bed one morning.

Contemplating whether I would continue to do the work that I'm doing or quit. The reason for that is because right before I got up, I heard the sounds of chains hitting the floor. And it had always been a nightmare to hear these chains. When I ran to the front window and I looked outside, it was a tow truck driver coming to repossess my car for the second time in eight months.

I was like, you know what? At that point, I had been in business five years. I was like, I gave it a good run. I tried this out. It's not working. I was struggling to make $20,000 a year. And while I'm sitting on the edge of my bed thinking about all of this, my client that I had been working with, Keisha Dior, she was running a cosmetic company. I had created a documentary of her story. Building the business from the ground up. I was blessed to be able to see it from. From her. Building it from the ground up. And she called me in excitement. She was like, jude, Jude, you won't believe it. You won't believe it. And I'm like, what happened, Kesha? She said, I just got off the phone with my accountant, and he just told me we made a million dollars. We crossed over the seven figure mark, man.

And in that moment, I had a choice. Do I quit? Do I really quit? Because obviously, there's just proof I'm not good enough. Here's this client who's only been in business for a year. She's made $1 million. I've been in business five years and struggling to make 20,000 a year. But then I decided to look at it a different way. I actually had something that was valuable. Why was Keisha able to make a million dollars from this documentary that I created for her? And when I went back and looked at this blueprint, if you will, or the roadmap as to why this documentary worked, it was never about the cosmetics. It was never about the lipstick. She was creating different kind of lipstick, blue lipstick, purple back in 2010, that wasn't popular.

But it wasn't about that. She was sharing her story of women empowerment. Being confident in the skin that you're in. If you want to wear blue lipstick, wear blue lipstick. If you want to Wear green lipstick. Wear it, but wear it confident.

And know that you're different. Right. It was because of her story that made her business successful. And so that connection, that piece, is what I began after 2010. I began to incorporate in everything else that I did later on. So now I do this thing called a roadmapping session. And in roadmapping, we go through three phases. Dramatic clarity, dramatic demonstration, dramatic leverage. But the most important piece is dramatic clarity. Your story doesn't matter unless you get really clear on your core values, your core philosophies and beliefs and why you want to share this story with someone else. The same way that we make friends in real life, the same way you and I connected a couple weeks ago on a call.

Is because we started to share our stories.

Right.

And that you've lived in Asia and had such a crazy life that I can't imagine.

But that's why we're able to have a comfortable conversation right now, is because I understand your story.

Yeah, same here.

Right. Right. So Keisha Dior, I realized it in 2010, and I just have continued to do that over and over. But you got to get really clear on who you are, what you stand for, so that you can make the choice that we've been talking about. Right. Like, who are you outside of the work that you do? When I burnt out in 2020, I did have an identity crisis because I was told I needed to slow down in my work, but I valued my worth in my work.

Yeah.

So now I have to think about, who are you, Jude, outside of the work that you do? And it's funny, because I've always said that to my clients. I've always said, who are you outside of work? You may be a mother or father or husband or wife or, you know, a best friend, a really great friend. But tell me more. What are the interests that you have?

Right.

Like, for example, I like to go cycling. I work out at Orange Theory Fitness. Right? Like, there's all these other things, but who are you? What? When someone.

Thinks about who you are or when you show up in a room, what is the presence that you bring?

Man, when people get that, there's a level of trust and loyalty that's beyond.

There's a bind there that. That's beyond anything you can measure, you know? And it's not if you've put your identity in other things, because I. I sit there and contemplate that. That question go, who. Who am I? And I start thinking about, well, but a lot of it is, what have I Done, you know, which isn't really what we want to define ourselves.

Right? You know, it's not what have I done? It's how I've made people feel.

Yeah.

Yeah, right. Like, that's the thing.

When. When someone's deciding whether or not to work with you, to buy your course, to hire you as a coach, to hire you as a consultant, there's this one question they're asking in their head that they will never vocalize out loud. Why should I do business with you versus any and any and every other option available to me. But let's condense that. The question really is why you?

Yeah, it is why you?

And that's such a hard question for people to answer, like why you? Mel? If I show up to this podcast and I'm thinking about working with Mel, or I'm thinking about joining the affluent Entrepreneur course, why?

Why you? Because you're the leader of it, and that's why it's so important. There's so many products and services out there, many people who do the same thing, sell the same thing. But why? You.

See, I look at it, you know, us putting the accomplishments, the experience, the education.

And all that aside.

The thing that comes to mind is I actually deeply care that people have the opportunity to live the life that they feel that they've been put here to live, to be behind the movements.

The missions, and the things to make it happen. I believe that.

Legacy isn't what we leave behind in this world. It's what we get a chance to do in the moment we interact with the world. And so every moment is a legacy moment. And we, when we can come to that openly and fully expressed because we don't have the financial burdens, we feel like we've got to taken care of and all that.

The level of joy and fulfillment is exponential. And I think that's what drives me.

Now. Here's how I flip that.

What you just told me is that you believe in living legacy. Now, that's the way I'm going to shorten it. Yeah, but when was the specific moment in time when you realized this is it?

I think that there's two moments, the earlier moment and a validation moment. Watching Jeremy and realizing that, and Jeremy drew a picture of me. I was working, I was doing the things that I was supposed to do to build the business, get cash flow and all that stuff. And he drew a picture of me that he was really excited about. But when I looked at the picture, it was. It was of me standing in front of computer screens with Phones in my ear and. And another one on the desk ringing and. And those. And I. And it was this moment that I said, he's watching.

And he's taking in the love I talk about, but he's taking in more deeply how he experiences me.

And, you know, I don't tell the. There's a. There's a second piece of that story that was when he was 6, when he was 15. He was out at a football camp on Father's Day.

And he sent me a picture, and it was a picture of a. Of a father and son walking at sunset on a beach. And it said. He said he never told me how to live. He just lived and allowed me to watch.

And I look at that, and I said, I think Jeremy was a big catalyst in how I chose to live my life and how I chose to do some things. And then I think the validation moment was during the cancer battle when I truly realized that, yeah, actually, mortality is a possibility, that. That it's finite, and hopefully it's a long ways away. And so we have to be. Go back to what you said, intentional with how we spend the slices of our life. And I think those are the two moments that make me realize that it's not the money that matters, but the moments that do.

What I love about that, and the reason I wanted to flip it is because oftentimes, as entrepreneurs, we'll say the statement. A statement that sounds great. I shortened it to living legacy now, today versus thinking about what legacy you leave behind. But really, it's the moment when Jeremy was 6 and the moment when Jeremy was 15 that you realize, I'm living my legacy now. It is that full picture of Jeremy texting you, or the full picture of Jeremy drawing the picture. Right. That allows me, as an entrepreneur, or me, a person that may want to be a part of your world, to understand why you're so driven by this. That's why I love storytelling, is because while other people may use that line, live legacy now, or legacy may be a buzzword in our world today, no one else can rob you of that story. No one else can duplicate that story that you have with Jeremy. That moment in time, the very specific moment in time that now if you have the picture that Jeremy Drew At 6, if you still have it to this day, like I have, I still have. And we probably didn't talk about this, but in. When I started this business at 17 years old, I was in a TV production classroom in high school, and my TV production teacher, Mrs. Donnelly, taught me everything she knew about video production. And then she said to me, at the end of the school year, my junior year in high school, she said, jude, you're really, really talented at video production. I think you should start a business. Well, Mel, you already said it. I'm the youngest of 10. No one else in my family are entrepreneurs. My dad worked as a construction worker. My mom worked at a chair factory. And so I'm like, I can't be an entrepreneur. I don't even know what it means to be an entrepreneur.

I can't even spell it.

I can't even spell it. You're right. I couldn't spell it. At 17.

Yeah.

On May 5, 2006, Mrs. Donnelly handed a yellow envelope to me. She came into the classroom, handed me a yellow envelope, and I'm like, what is this? And she's like, look inside. And inside of this yellow envelope was my very first set of business cards. That is how I got started in business. I still have that business card till this day that.

Oh, my God.

It'S on my desk. And it reminds me every single day that, one, I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for Mrs. Donnelly having the belief in me and the courage in me. But two, that is my life's story. Why my mission is to lead and empower entrepreneurs to have relentless courage is because someone had courage in me. Someone instilled that in me.

Yeah.

That is the only reason 16 years later, I'm still doing the work that I'm doing. Every moment, I was faced with turning around, giving up, quitting. It took relentless courage.

Man.

That picture that you have, if you still have it, of what? Drew.

I have a version of his drawing. And I still have the picture he sent me. Yes.

But that's what brings it to life. That's what makes it what I call a dramatic demonstration. It's not just some story you tell me. It is making it real and tangible. The connection. Connection is this flighty thing that you can't really explain. Like, how do you explain to someone you've had a connection?

The tangible things that we have in our lives. Filming that sometimes even is what creates the dramatic demonstration. It's not enough for you to tell me who you are, tell me what you're about, show me. Make it real. Right? And so that's why I went through the whole Mrs. Donnelly stories. Because I think your two stories, even if it's the image that he sent you when he was 15 and he was at camp, I think that's a powerful image. Right. Of a Father and son.

Right? That's what makes it real. But that's what helps people understand what the affluent entrepreneur is all about. It's not about money. It's not about money. It's about the experiences. It's about the moments. It is about everything else outside of money. Money is just a small part of it.

Yeah, it is.

Right? And so to me, that's why I love what I do and why I will continue to do that even after I walk away from video production. Storytelling will be a part of my life and what I do next, but in a much bigger way. And it's because storytelling is the one thing that connects us. It's the one thing. It's kind of like music. Music is universal. You go to Asia, there's a different kind of music, but it's music, right? It gets your body moving. It gets your body flowing. Stories are the same way. Stories transport us to a very specific moment in time. And that transportation creates transformation that allows us to continue to deeply connect. I'm all about. One of my core values is depth versus width. I'm all about that. And it's how I work. It's how, like you mentioned at the beginning of this, why I don't allow just anyone on my list. Everything I do is about depth. And so I think. But that's because I understand that storytelling is about depth. And the more stories we share, the more people that share stories, they inspire others. They leave. They don't. They not only live their legacy today, they leave it behind. But I agree with you. Living your legacy today, being intentional.

Yeah.

How can you be intentional about what you're doing today? Share your story. Because there's someone else that needs that story. Someone else needs to hear that in order to keep going for themselves.

It's. God, it's so important because. Because I. And the other thing to think about, because I've had this conversation with customers or clients before where they say, well, you know.

Who wants to hear my story? Who wants to hear my story? And the thing is that.

Does it really matter how many people want to hear my story? Because what it really is is the one person that's on the precipice that hears it and says, I better wake up. Then your story mattered exponentially. It still matters. But rather than us, I.

It was. It was important. I sat on the manuscript of my book for five years. I didn't. Because. And. And a dear, dear friend of mine, Brennan Burchard, you know, I'm backstage with him all the time, running his Shows. And. And he says, I said, I have an idea. And he says, I don't want to hear any more of your ideas. What's the deal? He says, when are you going to put the book out? I don't know. I said. He says, why are you not putting the book out? And this goes back to story. I said, because there's a lot of me in the book.

And he said, you need to put the book out because someone needs to hear a little bit of you.

Yep.

And he wouldn't do anything for me until I put the book out. And within two weeks, we sold 16 books. Thousand books. But point being is that someone out there needs to hear these stories. Someone out there, whether it's you're in a product business, a service business, a personal brand business.

We live in a superficial world of comparison social media. And I love the fact that you say depth is a core value.

Yeah.

That's bring depth and realness back to the world through your businesses, through your endeavors, through your stories.

I think that's powerful.

Yeah. And many people discount their stories. Right? Like they think. So the Mrs. Donnelly story of her giving me business cards, I didn't share that for years because I thought, oh, no one needs to hear that. That's nothing special about that. Again, a story is about a very specific moment in time. When I started sharing that moment in time and I realized people's eyes would light up. I remember sitting in a. I was consulting for a law firm. This law firm had just turned, or they were getting ready to turn 100 years old and they wanted to think about how they would craft the story of the 100 year story. And I started with that opening and I was like, you know what, I could tell you everything about storytelling or I could tell you about the moment in time Mrs. Donnelly or. My teacher gave me the way that I got started in this business. My teacher gave me my first set of business cards and I saw the lawyer's eyes light up. And I said, when you tell the story of this 100 year firm, it's not about how great you guys are, what Ivy League school you guys went to. It's a very specific moment when you realize this firm is special. Right. They like to say that firm, specifically, they like to say that they're like a family. And I was like, okay, well, tell me a specific moment in time. And they told me about this story. It's a funny story, but they went as a team, they went to a carnival together and they had this crazy idea that they would Buy a pig. I was like, that's. But that's the story that breaks down the wall from these stuffy, stuffy lawyers and attorneys to know we're real people and we really are like a family that we'll do some crazy things like go buy a pig. Right.

I love that.

But that's the point of stories, and I think so don't discount your story is my point. It's like sometimes, yes, we are afraid of the real story and people finding us out and telling the real story, but there are other times it's just, show people you're human.

You're human, Right?

Like you're.

Show them that we do. There's this old saying, we do business with people that we know like and trust. Well, how do they get to know who you are? Like, what you have to say and trust that you can help them on their journey? It's by sharing your story. Every single person you speak to share your story. I didn't spend the past 40 minutes or an hour talking to you about.

The filmmaking that I do or that I'm one of the best documentary filmmakers. No, I shared my story with you. And when you do that, when you do that, the same way Mel has shared his stories on this podcast, that's what creates the connection. That's what transforms everything I am able to do, the work that I'm able to do, have people apply to be on my list, speak on over a hundred podcasts, all these things. I am not popular. I'm not a Brandon Burchard. I'm not a Mel Abraham. I'm not a Rick Mulready.

But people are still interested in my story. It's only because I lead with story.

Yeah. I think it's so powerful. I mean, we had. It's the story. We had an instant connection, like you said.

Yeah, you heard me. For the backstory for people who aren't aware you heard me on Rick's podcast.

I did.

But it's because Rick Mulready's the Art of Online Business podcast. But it's only because I shared my story. You'd never heard of me before then, but the moment you heard of me, you reached out and he's like, hey, I got to get to know more about you. I just want to support you. And that's. But that's what helped us become friends, is because you heard my story already. The reason you said you wanted to support me, it wasn't because you had seen my work. No. You had heard my.

Put it behind a gateway I can't see your work.

Right. But you heard my story. You heard me share my story. And I think that's the critical piece that many people don't realize, like businesses that Apple businesses that we love, Google, they started with stories, right? People in their garage just starting a business.

I think that the reality is that had you been on Rick's podcast and it come across as well, he's a branding expert, I'd have never reached out to you. It was the story. It's true. It was the story that go. There is something about this guy, and I want to get to know him. I want to. I want to share him. I want to share his. It wasn't sharing you. I want to share your story because I think it's powerful.

Yeah.

And, you know, I know we haven't talked a lot about some of the stuff that you do, per se, but I think one of the key elements that I want to make sure that you mentioned it, but I want to make sure that they understood what was really powerful for me is that core element of dynamic demonstration.

Dramatic demonstration. Yes, Dynamic two.

You want to demonstrate it. You want to bring it to life in not just a thinking form, but an emotional form, a physical form, and allow people to live into it.

Yeah. Yeah. So I call it the dramatic demonstration of proof. We all make claims, right? Like, I did the exercise with you without telling you, but it was when you make the claim that I believe in living out your legacy now. Okay, That's a claim in the same way that a lawyer goes to a courtroom and he has to, or he or she has to give. Burden of proof is the same proof that you have to give as an entrepreneur.

Prove it. Okay. I believe in living your legacy now. Okay? Prove it. And you prove it through the story. But then let's bring that story to life. So I have these five dramatic demonstrations that I go through behind the scenes. A live illustration, social proof, unique mechanism and transformation behind the scenes we're familiar with. That's just showing me the raw, the gritty. What's happening when no one's looking.

Social proof is what do other people have to say about you? The way that I think about it, though, is when someone's speaking to you and they put their hand on their heart, that says something. When they're laughing or nodding their head, that says something. Right? So I'm looking at those visual elements. Live illustration is kind of what I did with the business card, where I held the business card up, the very first one that Mrs. Donnelly gave me. I held it up to the camera. That's a live illustration. How do you. How do you take an idea and make it tangible for someone? I had a client who did this live illustration where he. His point was be careful who you tether yourself to. So he had the tallest person in the room stand on a chair. He had the shortest person in the room try to pull the person that was standing on the chair pull him down. And it was easy to do it. But then he asked the guy, okay, try to pull her up. And the guy couldn't pull her up. And he was like, that's the point. It's harder to pull people up, but it's really easy for them to pull you down. So be careful who you tell yourself.

That's a great one.

Right. So that's a live illustration. Unique mechanism is your characteristics. I like to say that I'm a detective, but again, how do I bring that to life? I just somewhat did that and I do that on some podcasts where I'll go through asking a ton of questions just to get to the core of. Of your. Why the core of who you're really about. That's a unique mechanism. There's something that you have.

That no one else can duplicate and marketing unique mechanism. Can most people think about that like you have. I believe you have the thought leader blueprint or the thought leader thing. Right? Yeah, that's a unique mechanism. But there's something about the way Mel does it. Right. That's how I think about unique mechanism. And then transformation is life before. Life is before and after, which we've seen in fitness world. But then life after. So there's this fitness coach who coaches women who are over 40. She received a picture, an image, a text message from her client. And in the text message is a picture of an empty airplane. And then the words the client says, this is the first time in my life. She's been on planes plenty of times. She's over 40, but this is the first time in my life I haven't had to ask for a seatbelt extension. That is life after.

Yeah, yeah, it is.

Not having to feel embarrassed or anxiety or whatever it is in that moment that she has to ask for a seatbelt extension. It's not about losing £100 and then feeling like. Feeling like you can get into the jeans that you wore in high school. No, it's about life after. I get to go on this airplane and not have to ask for a seatbelt extension anymore. Those are the five demonstrations that I look for that Some of them I will combine, but that's, in my opinion, the last 16 years I've been doing this work. That's how you bring a story to life. That's how you make it tangible. That's how you create the dramatic demonstration of proof. The dramatic part is the story. The demonstration are the visual elements that you bring into this story. It's not just about filming video. I happen to film video, but it's about. Even when you're speaking on stage.

When I speak about burnout, I've been speaking about burnout lately because I've gone through it. I talk about two ideas. When you. You have to sharpen your perspective and subtract the noise. Well, when I talk about subtracting the noise, after I share my story, I go through this live illustration of a Jenga set. We've played. We've all played Jenga before, but this Jenga set has words written on it. Spending too much time on Facebook, listening to too many podcasts, redoing my website again.

And I subtract it and Jenga, normally when you subtract a piece, you put it right back on top. My theory was just subtract it all together, leave it out, and you realize the structure still holds. When I gave the talk, I actually asked people in the audience, who needs to stop listening to too many podcasts? Who needs to do xyz? I threw the piece out that they raised their hand for, and then I went in the Facebook group and I asked them, hey, who still has their pieces? And they didn't just tell me, oh, I do what I do. They took a picture of the piece sitting in front of their computer at home as a reminder. That's how you make your stories tangible. It's not just going to give a speech. It's not just showing up to this podcast. How do you make it real for someone to be able to say, oh, I get it now. You have transformed them. And so that's. Yeah, that's all the stuff that I do. I've been doing that the last 16 years. I finally wrote a book about it that I launched in 2022. And, yeah, that's just my life's work that I will be retiring from in five years. But it's my life's work.

Well, and so you have the book. Yes, let's tell the folks about the book because it's packaged differently, it's presented differently, and it's. And look, we've spent about an hour together.

And y' all that are watching and listening this Is a powerful hour. If not that I want you to do this, but if you never listen to any other episodes of mine, but you got this. But you got to listen to the other episodes anyways.

You got this and started to live into this, it will transform not just your business, your relationships, your life, your connection points, all of it. And so I think it's important for us to start to understand that. And.

This book and your work in our world today is immensely necessary.

Yeah. Yeah. The book takes you on a journey of three other entrepreneurs. My clients, Stefan, Georgi Darnell, Jervy Harmon, and Dr. Tracy Lynn. And I show you how they live out this dramatic demonstration of proof process. The book is a roadmap. I do a thing called roadmapping. But this book allows you to do it on your own. You go through the three sections. Dramatic clarity, dramatic demonstration, and dramatic leverage to be able to bring your own story to life. But you get to see how other entrepreneurs are doing it. They're in very diverse industries, very diverse individuals, too. They're diverse personalities. There's a funny story about Stefan. At the time that we were filming his documentary series, Tiger King came out, and he was just like, dude, I'm nowhere. I'm not nothing like a tiger king. I don't think I should be doing this documentary. But we go through that, though, right? Like, how does this guy who's a copywriter and copywriting can be boring. How do you make that interesting? Right. How do you make the mundane actually exciting to experience? That's what dramatic demonstration the book is about. It is walking you through how to do that for yourself. I wrote it. It took two years to write. Parts of my story are in there. But it is the first of three books I'm writing to help people transform their lives in this way that I've been talking about. It will be when I walk away from video production completely. It will be the thing that has packaged everything that I've learned in the last 20 years. And so, yeah, definitely, JudeCharles Co is where you can find that book. I would suggest getting on the newsletter as well. The newsletter is probably, in my opinion, more important than the book, but it's the best place to connect with me and to continue this conversation, live out this life. Like. Like Mel said, be intentional.

Yeah.

About the life that you're living. The affluent entrepreneur is not just about money. Money makes life a little easier.

Yep.

But money will either amplify what. It will amplify what's already there.

Right.

And so what you need what needs to be there is understanding who you are. What I love about the break that I take in December when I'm completely unplugged is that I often tell people, what do you think, though? Like, it's not enough. You've listened to me for this last hour talk about the way I live my life and all these things, but what do you think after listening to this? Who are you? Because the world will continue to tell you what you should think and who you are. But you need to know who you are and what you think. That's why I call it dramatic clarity, because you cannot lead unless you have dramatic clarity on who you are.

So true. And we need leaders today.

Yep.

And absolutely clarity on who you are.

It's.

It's just there's so many parallels. I used to tell the kids at the karate school, when I owned the karate school. I said, there's two questions you have to answer in your life. What do you stand for? And how are you going to show up? And with the answer to those questions.

The answer to all other questions become easier.

Yes.

And I'm like, going, you're doing the same thing.

It's so cool.

Yeah.

You know, it's funny because my background, so when I was a kid, I. In elementary school, I took taekwondo, so I do have a martial arts background. Right. And I have a music background, which is really what's influenced my life, is music. I used to play the cello in middle school and then the French horn in high school. But what I say is that life has a rhythm, and you have to get on the beat of that rhythm, find the rhythm for yourself. Find. Find the pace, the rhythm. But when you find that, that's what helps you live life easier. But. But I think there is parallels to martial arts, too, and that I'm sure that's influenced my life as well. So.

Yeah. Jude, man. God, I could talk to you for hours.

Yes. Yeah.

And I know that this is just the start of.

Yes.

A friendship, a journey together.

And living richer. I so appreciate you. 1. Taking the time. I know that you normally take these days off.

Taking the time to chat with me, to serve my community, to be.

And I'm grateful that you're in my life now.

I am, too. I'm grateful for you reaching out. You know, it's not every day that someone reaches out simply because they just want to support the work that you do. Support you. And so I'm grateful for that as well. We'll definitely be seeing each other. I think I told you I'll be in San Diego in a few weeks. So, yeah, we'll definitely be seeing each other. But, yeah, this is the beginning of a true friendship. But again, if you've made it this far, that friendship started with me sharing my story.

Absolutely. Absolutely. And I'm going to make sure that we share access to you and, and that way they can get. Go deeper, they can understand more about what you can do, how you can support them in their journey.

Yes.

Because I think it's needed. And, and as always, man, whatever I can do to support you, I'm a text away. You know that.

Definitely, Definitely.

I appreciate you, my friend. Thank you so, so much for sharing a slice of your life with us.

Yeah. Thank you, thank you, thank you for.

Being part of the affluent entrepreneurship with me, your host, Mel Abraham. If you want to achieve financial liberation to create an affluent lifestyle, join the affluent entrepreneur facebook group@melabraham.com group and I'll see you there. Cheers.

Bye.

And that's it for this episode of building your money machine, where we help you learn how to master your money, eliminate financial stress, and live a life of choice. If you found this valuable or helpful to you, here's what I'd love for you to do. If you do me a favor, go to Apple, Apple podcast, or wherever you're listening to this podcast and rate and review the show. It helps us tremendously to keep us at the top of the list so we can continue to get this information and this message out to people, because I truly believe that financial freedom is your birthright, and I want to help each and every one of you claim it. Thanks so much.