The One Choice That Will Determine Your Financial Future
26 Jun 2025 · 7 min
Mel Abraham argues your money identity, how you see yourself financially, determines your future more than any single decision. He outlines the Five R's: recognize your current money story, reframe limiting beliefs, rewrite your desired identity, refine skills incrementally, and reinforce progress through aligned actions.
Chapters
Hey there, real quick, before we jump into the episode, listen, if your earnings treadmill hasn't set you free yet, running faster won't either. Listen, hustle without principles just going to burn you out. So here's what I want for you. I want you to join me for my money machine experience Live. It is three free trainings. Deep dive into how to escape the treadmill and build a money machine that actually works for you. All right, grab your spot here by going to moneymachinelive.com and I'll see you in the free training. Do you ever wonder why some people seem to build wealth without breaking a sweat? Maybe others, though, the rest of us seem to be stuck in a universe that maybe just missed the memo on financial freedom of financial goals. Is there a secret to making it happen? Or are we just doomed to binge watch other people's dream lives on Instagram while eating our reheated pizza? I don't know. Listen, if you ever felt like you're hustling hard and not getting any closer to financial freedom, and you keep asking yourself, what am I missing? What is it? Trust me, you're not broken and you're not alone. Today, I'm sharing with you the one choice, the one thing that can truly determine your financial destiny. It's not some magic formula. It's not some weird trick. It's just the real reason that I see people win with money and those that don't. So grab your coffee, get curious, sit down. Let's dive in to what I think is the most powerful financial decision you're ever going to make to help you create wealth. Because your financial future is waiting on who you decide to become. Let's do this.
Have you ever wondered why some people can seem to build wealth effortlessly while others seem to struggle no matter what it is that they do? Doesn't matter how many spreadsheets they look at or how many budgeting apps they might download, they struggle. Here's the spoiler alert. The fact of the matter is that it has nothing to do with the spreadsheets. It's not the knack of picking the next Tesla stock, and it's certainly not because they happen to buy Bitcoin at $3. So listen, before we dive in and I want to talk about the one choice that you can make when it comes to your money that will complet transform your financial destiny and trajectory. But before we do, because it sets it up, I want to bring up a book. And no, this book isn't my book. But along with My book, it is a must. It's a must read. And that is this. The Psychology of Money with Morgan Housel. This is a master class on the mindset and the psychology, the weird things even that our mind does when it comes to money. And this is the thing that I think starts to drive the choices that we make. So I think this is an absolute must read along with my book. Well, let's face.
Should be a must read, especially if you're here watching this channel. You come here for the truth. You come here for the real stuff, and you stay for a shameless plug. I get it. But here's how I look at this. When you start to understand this, it's not about the book. It's not about the book report, it's not about any of that. The single most important takeaway when you talk about money mindset and money mindset books and the things that Housel talks about, or even I talk about is one choice. And this choice is what defines your financial destiny. And that is what is your money identity? Now, some people say, what do you mean by money identity? The financial identity that you give yourself is, isn't about a job. It isn't about a career. It isn't about your education. It's not about your salary. It's not about the car you drive. It's about how you see yourself in relation to money. It's really looking at it and saying, wait, am I a spender? Am I a saver? Am I someone who believes that money is scarce or someone who sees it as a tool? Or maybe just like me, I see it as the paintbrush to paint the masterpiece called your life. But here's the thing. Identity shapes every single thing you do. Identity shapes every decision you make. It's like wearing a set of glasses in the way you see every single dollar, every single investment, every single opportunity. And so if your money identity is stuck in a I'm just not good with money mode, that's like trying to run a marathon with your shoelaces tied together. Okay? You're not going to get very far, and you're definitely going to not break any records. So here's why I think this is important. I have said over and over again.
That your ability to build wealth has more to do with your behaviors than it has to do with your money. And your identity starts to define your behaviors. We do what we believe we were capable of doing. We do the things to be in alignment and congruent with our identity. And so my question is, what is your Identity, where does it come from? How is it, how does it come about? Because the elephant in the room is, well, what if you just don't feel confident? What if you just don't know and you're not sure where it comes from? What do you do? Here's the magic. Here's the magic. The money identity isn't something you're born with, it's something you build, it's something you learn. It's one of the most powerful ways to transform your financial destiny. Because it's built through learning, it's built through skilling up. Nobody, nobody pops out of the womb saying, oh, that Roth ira. It just doesn't happen. Or they don't understand investment strategy. It just doesn't happen. See, every money skill, including the skills that I have, every new bit of knowledge is like a little brick in a new money identity. So instead of realizing or thinking that I'm not good with money, try on, I'm someone who learns about money. See, that's the bridge. The most successful people I know, they're not the ones who just know things and know everything. They're the ones that never stop asking, they're the ones that never stop learning, they're the ones that keep asking questions. And so if you were sitting back to try and build.
A new money identity, what would you do? And I'm going to give you a five step process.
That I use, that I've used and I think it'll help because let's get practical. We can talk about the idea of identity, but if we don't talk about how do we transform it, how do we build it, how do we make it something different, how do we upgrade it, if you will, then you're going to feel stuck, you're going to feel stagnated and you're going to say, this is my lot in life. We only rise to the level of money identity that we have. And if that money identity doesn't allow us to move to the place of financially free, we'll never get there. Not because we don't have the capacity, not because we don't have the capability, it's because we don't have the identity. And when we don't have the identity, we won't live into the identity and do the things that we need to do. So I'm going to talk through five steps here and I call them the five R's framework to make this happen. The first is this is number one is to recognize your current money story, recognize what it is you're identifying and telling yourself, what are the stories in your head? What have you been telling yourself about wealth, about money, about what's possible for you, not everyone else, not the people you look at. And are you running on someone else's script? Because the second piece of this, of this recognize is, well, where did it come from? Because if we weren't born, if we didn't come out of the womb Talking about Roth IRAs and investments and things like that, it had to be learned. So where did it come from? Was it just from observation? Most of our financial lessons are caught, not taught. Was it watching our parents? Was it watching our parents argue? Or seeing your father cry like I did at 5 years old about money, about the things. Okay, and what did that mean for you? Okay, so once we recognize the stories and the source of those stories, then the second step in this is to reframe it. To reframe those beliefs, to start to look at them through a different set of eyes. Because you got to ask yourself, even first step, is the story that you were told, is it even true? Or is it just old programming that you happen to pick up from family, from friends and colleagues, from infomercials, from media, from social media? Is it, is it something that was misinterpreted? And it's time to start to reframe those beliefs into the reality of the truths that, that came about with respect to that not based on some interpretation of what happens. Okay, so once we recognize it and then we reframe it, now is time to rewrite it. What do you want your identity to be? And I'm here to tell you, listen, I am a son of an immigrant. My dad came here at 17 years old with nothing. I didn't come from money. I built it, I lost it, I rebuilt it. But I couldn't rebuild it. I couldn't even build it the first time. If I didn't rewrite my money, I didn't just see the things, see the things that I can skill up and understand and really build it. So this is the point in your journey where you start to decide, make a choice, what you really want your new financial story to be. What's it going to be? Are you going to be a person that says, I'm a wealth builder? Are you going to be that same person that sits back and says, I'm not good with numbers? Are you going to be a person that says, I use money to create freedom and legacy for my family? What is it? Because when you start to define those deliberately, you start to take Actions in alignment with that, that leads to step number four and that's to refine, refine the skills one step at a time. Because when you decide that, you say, hey, I'm going to be this wealth creator that starts to give you some gaps and some angst because you start to look at and go, well, I don't have all the skills, that's okay. That's when you start building the skills. Who do you need to learn from? What is one thing right now that you can learn? Is it budgeting? Is it investing, is it negotiating? Is it getting a little better at money management? So you don't have to master this overnight because your financial freedom journey, it's a lifetime journey, it'll never end. You're still on the journey each and every day. So just move forward bit by bit, one step at a time. Every little win, no matter how small it is, is another brick in your new financial identity. And that leads to step number five and that is this. Reinforce it all, Reinforce it all by making sure that you're taking actions that are in alignment with that identity and then celebrate along the way. So track your progress, listen, shout out the victories, understand how far you've come. I remember, you know, for 11 years I had a martial arts studio. I've been in the martial arts for 40 plus years and lived and trained in Japan. And one of the reasons we had a little Dragons program for our three to five year olds, we didn't teach them martial arts, we taught them balance, coordination, speed, strength and all that stuff. But we did it in six week cycles. And what we noticed is that after about two cycles, kids would drop out, they didn't have belts, they didn't do the normal stuff that our adult and children students did. And so we came up with an idea. And that idea was to give them a merit badge, a patch that they could sew on the bottoms of their, of their, their GI bottoms, their pants that they wore and they would create this ladder. And it was a ladder of recognition, but more importantly as a ladder of reinforcement that they took an action, that they developed a skill and that they celebrated the win. This is why and what I think we need to do in developing our new financial identity. It's the one choice that will completely transform your financial destiny. And too often we fail to recognize how far we've come. We fail to celebrate the little steps and wins along the way. So even if nobody's looking, do it for yourself. Give yourself that high five. Every step forward, every step forward. Because progress is the proof that your identity is changing. Okay, I hope that this, this makes sense because to me, this is by far one of the greatest and the most important choices you can ever make when it comes to finances. It's not what do you do with the money, it's not what's the next investment, it's not, you know, who's that, who's the next Amazon or anything like that. It's who you going to be in your financial journey. And at the end of the day, this one choice will determine your financial destiny. It will, it'll create what I call your financial set point. And when you start to understand that you can make the right choices to build the identity to carry you to the financial destiny and the financial identity you deserve, you desire. And then on the other side of that.
Is the life that you want. It's what I call that freedom based life. A life that is built on choice and a choice that you get to choose to do what you want to do, when you want to do it, how you want to do it. So listen, if this one hit home, let me know, let me know in the comments, let me know where the struggles are on your journey to a new financial identity. Because when we understand that we can build the financial identity together, the money identity together, and as we build that identity, we build the bank account, we build your money machine, more importantly, we give you the pathway to living that rich life. All right, I hope you found this valuable, I hope you found this helpful. And I hope that you'll take it, run with it and build the financial identity you know that you're capable of doing to live the life that you deserve to live in the way you live it. And as I always say, until we see each other on the road to your financial freedom, freedom, always, always strive to live a life that outlives you. See you in the next one. Cheers. Thank you for listening to the affluent entrepreneurship with me, your host, Mel Abraham. If you want to achieve financial liberation to create an affluent lifestyle, join me in the affluent entrepreneur Facebook group now by going to melabraham.com group and I'll see you there.
And that's it for this episode of building your money machine where we help you learn how to master your money, eliminate financial stress and live a life of choice. If you found this valuable or helpful to you, here's what I'd love for you to do. If you do me a favor, go to Apple, Apple Podcast or wherever you're listening to this podcast and rate and review the show. It helps us tremendously to keep us at the top of the the list so we can continue to get this information and this message out to people, because I truly believe that financial freedom is your birthright, and I want to help each and every one of you claim it. Thanks so much.










