The Underrated Way of Building Wealth No One Talks About

Hey there, real quick before we jump into the episode, listen, if your earnings treadmill hasn't set you free yet, running faster won't either. Listen, hustle without principles just going to burn you out. So here's what I want for you. I want you to join me for my money machine experience live. It is three free trainings. Deep dive into how to escape the treadmill and build a money machine that actually works for you. All right, grab your spot here by going to moneymachinelive.com and I'll see you in the free training. What if the richest moments of your life had nothing to do with money? You know, if you've ever felt like there's more to life than just chasing the mighty dollar or wondered why is it that some people have financial success, yet it doesn't bring fulfillment with it, well, then this episode's for you. I'm about to reveal the true source of richness in life. The moments, the relationships, the experiences that fill our hearts, not just our bank accounts.

Hey there, and welcome back to building your money Machine. And I'm Mel Abraham. Today I actually want to have a conversation that is slightly different, but it actually isn't because everything we do with respect to the show with. With the work that I do is. Is about building wealth. It's about managing money, but more importantly, about building your life. In fact, if you look at my book, building your money Machine, the first part of the book is about life. The last part of the book is about life. And in the center section is the money to fund that life. And I just. I want to do something a little different, a little special, because as this is being released, it is Thanksgiving morning, and many of us during this time, we get a chance to stop and reflect on some of the things that we're grateful for. And. And listen, if we're not taking the time to stop and reflect for some of the things we're grateful for, then maybe that's the first place we need to do is because this is a time that we get to reflect and spend time with people we love to create experiences that we cherish and treasure and moments that matter. And so I'm going to ask you this. What if true wealth wasn't measured by what's in our bank accounts, but by the richness of our relationships and the legacy we create while we're still here, not the legacy that we leave behind. We'll talk about that in a bit. But this episode, I really want to share some things about how generosity and gratitude are at the heart of true wealth at the heart of richness. And we'll talk about principles to build wealth in this episode. But I don't want to do it in some institutional way where we're just talking about the mathematics and the processes. I want to attach it to your life. This is a time and a season in our world where we get a chance to start to look at our life and say, is this what we want? Is this how we want to live? Is this what I was meant to do? And we start to ask those questions, and they're great questions to ask, and may you never stop asking them. But here's the thing. I want us to look at it and say, well, what are your values that would make your life richer? And how financial freedom can feed those values. And that financial freedom is essential to living into those values in a free way, by choice. And by having financial freedom, you get a chance to live a life full of the values you have, the desire you dream about, the meanings, the meaning that you want and the purpose you have. So that's kind of where I want to go with this. And I know that it's a little different. It's not as technical, but we are going to have some steps here that I want you to talk about, walk through it. But I want us to keep the spirit of the season in our hearts as we go through this, because here's what I've seen. We spend so much of our lives chasing financial success, career success, professional success. I mean, heck, we're spending eight to ten hours a day working four, five, six days a week. And we think that once we hit that magical number, you know, whether it's a million dollars, whether it's 2 million, 10 million, 100 million, or whether it's buying the dream house or having the fancy car or the nice watch, then we will feel fulfilled. But here's the truth. What really matters in life about fulfillment is just never going to be found in the bank account. I have watched people. In fact, I know someone right now who has everything you can imagine in the billions, okay? They have multiple planes. They travel, they stay up. They got homes they got. And yet they're miserable. Why is that? Well, I think that there's some things that are missing. Nothing in the bank account is missing, but we're missing something else. Think about this. When you look back at your life, what are the moments that matter most? It's not the paychecks that you earn. It's the laughter around the dinner table. It's the time that you stood by a barbecue with your friends, cracking up and laughing. It's the times where things were tough and you saw your friends, your family and people rally around you and doing that, it's the warmth of the loved ones that you get to share life with and the joy that you create with these shared experiences. For me, it's playing with my granddaughters, it's traveling with my wife and almost missing the boarding of a cruise ship or.

Just walking long walks with my dogs. These things are what bring richness to life. Okay, here's a stat that might surprise you. Research has shown that people who value their time over money are significantly happier. In fact, I have said repeatedly and in fact wrote about it in my book, I actually think that your wealth would be better served if we measure it in time and not dollars. How much time do you control? How much time are you in? You have agency over to be able to decide what you do, when you do it, how you do it, who you do it with.

That's what. Because you could have a hundred million dollars in the bank. But if you can't control your time, if you're beholden to someone else and something else from your time, are you truly free? Maybe you have financial, but you're not free. There's a study that was published by Social, Psychological and Personality Science that found those who prioritize their time and their relationships over the material stuff report higher levels of happiness and, and life satisfaction. Because we are barraged with stuff. I mean, just get on Instagram, get on the Internet, get on, on media and it's the marketing messages of stuff, stuff, stuff, stuff. Stuff is going to make you happy, but it doesn't make you happy. It doesn't give you that, the deep connection that you're looking for. It doesn't allow that into your life. It actually gets in the way. And so if it's truly the richness, the happiness, the fulfillment we want, the money that we're creating, the finances that we're creating are simply a bridge and a tool to get there. And we need to know how to do it. And that's what I'm, I'm teaching. But the tools and the things and the skills that you develop with me aren't for the purpose of just building a number. They're for the purpose of building a real life, building a rich life, building something that actually matters. Because when you do that, you, in your soul, in your spirit and in your finances, you get to be generous. You get to be more generous than you've ever Been because you have agency over your time. So you can put your. I've got a friend right now that's in the middle of a negotiation. It's a big negotiation for him that is going to change and shift things for his family and his future. And.

I'm taking time away to help him with the negotiation. If I was beholden to a time clock, a timesheet or something like that, I probably, I couldn't do that as easily. But the point is that I can be generous with my time, I can be generous with my money, I can be generous with my actions. And wealth isn't really about what you keep and get. It's also about what you get to give and your ability to. To. To give to it. And that is where I want us to. Because true wealth is really about what we give away in time, in resources, in love.

When you look at the different studies out there that that happen is that people that are on the receiving end, they feel good because they're receiving a gift or they're receiving help or they're receiving assistance. So they have that. But the research actually shows it's the act of generosity that activates the brain. And the brain reward centers in a way that releases the dopamine that makes us feel happier. I know that when I had the martial arts studio around this time of year, all the kids would get together and we would create things to take to families that maybe have fallen on hard times. And we would take them to the families for the kids and everything anonymously. We didn't care for recognition, we didn't wear our school T shirts, we didn't tell them where. We just said, we are a friend who cares and pay it forward one day. And the gift, the vibrancy, the energy, the happiness that came out of giving and seeing the happiness on the other side was huge. And we had the opportunity to do that because we did the financial stuff right.

So generosity isn't just about the money. Generosity is about the time, the effort, the energy, the kindness and the giving. And I have seen it firsthand over and over again that when you give, you get back deeper connections and you don't give for the deeper connections. You give because it gives to you because you know it's the right thing. It strengthens relationships. It brings purpose into life. Chasing the dollar isn't. Isn't enough. We chase the dollar of the purse. Remember, money is a result. It's not a purpose. There's a purpose behind it. So here's my question for you as you Start to look at this.

What can you give today that will make someone else's life richer?

It's a question we should be asking every day, every week. What can I give today that could make someone else's life richer? Here's an interesting fun stat that I found when I was kind of researching people who regularly volunteer. Okay. And I used to be part of Rotary and those kinds of things. People who regularly volunteer have a 27% lower chance of dying earlier than compared to those don't. Okay, wait a second. By being a volunteer and giving back to the world, like my brother does, a tremendous amount of volunteering for vet veterans and that kind of thing. And so, you know, we're identical twins, does that mean that I better. I better volunteer even more? Because I don't, you know, 27% lower chance of dying earlier. So giving not only makes you feel good, it actually gives you health. It gives you vibrancy. So here's the way I would look at this. When I didn't have the money, what I gave was a dime. Now with the money, I can give the money and I can give the time. I can give the things I can give, the meaning I can support. So this week, as you're thinking it through, what's one little small step that you can give something to someone in need, Whether it's donating.

To a cause, whether it's offering to help a friend, whether it's quality time to someone. My mom recently just passed away. She was in an old in an assisted living center, and we would go see her regularly, but there was so many elderly there that I found out in talking with the administrative staff there that they never really had family come and visit.

And so what if you had a moment and you say, I'm just going to drop in. I just want to visit. I want to give quality time. Generosity isn't measured by the size of the gift, but it's measured by the impact you have on someone else's life. And that leads to this other piece that I think really fits at this point in time, and that is gratitude. Gratitude is where we start to find appreciation for where we are, appreciation for what we have. It forces. You cannot live in gratitude and lack at the same time. It just can't. But it is the gratitude that allows us to appreciate how far we've come, what we have. Even if it's minuscule or celebrate the micro successes, be grateful for them. Because what it forces you do is to shift your mindset to a much more open mindset of Possibility and what else is possible? That's where the financially rich comes from. That's where the building, the money machine comes from. Is to be grateful for where you're at, because that is going to help you drive forward. Gratitude doesn't just feel good. It literally is scientifically proven to improve, to, to improve your life. I mean, there are studies by Harvard that show that every morning when I take my walk, part of it is to get the dogs out, get them exercised so they don't go crazy the rest of the day. The other part of it is for me to be what I call on a gratitude walk, where I'm grateful for the things that I have, the things that I see to slow down enough to do that.

And I think that if you look at it, those that practice gratitude on a regular basis, they're more optimistic, they sleep better, they have better immune systems, that it's just. There is a way to do it. It doesn't have to be big things. It can start small just by sitting back and saying, I got my morning coffee and it's peaceful and you hear the birds and you're listening. Or to be grateful for your health, the health of your family, to be grateful for the friends. Just do that for a moment, for five minutes. Think about this, do this calculation. If you simply practice gratitude daily for five minutes, daily for five minutes. Spend five minutes when you first wake up to be grateful for that moment, it adds up, just that ends up over 30 hours a year, appreciating what you have. 30 hours a year, okay, that's rewiring your brain into happiness, into gratefulness, into abundance. That's where the richness comes from. Because what I've seen, especially with the work that I do, is we get so caught up in acquiring, accomplishing, achieving that it's onto the next, the next quest, if you will. We just won. Let's go to the next quest. No, let's enjoy this one for a moment. So here's what I'd invite you to do. Is a perfect time to take five minutes this morning and every morning, at least do it to the end of the year and then hopefully you'll continue on and jot down. Take five minutes and jot down three things you're grateful for. They don't have to be big. It could be that, you know, I slept through the night, I didn't wake up. You know, it just something that makes it a little brighter. It could be that the sun's out.

Some small habit, some small thing that's, I think where we need to do. Now.

Going back to this idea of financial freedom, I think that that is important.

But it doesn't come. Generosity and gratitude.

Are fueled by it, but it is not dependent on it. So we've talked about generosity and gratitude here for a rich life. But financial freedom plays an important role as well. Because listen, money might not buy happiness, but financial freedom gives you the space to focus on the things that really matter to you. It gives you the ability to choose what you do with your time. It's the foundation that allows you to live generously and more generously than you might otherwise be able to, to be fully present with the ones that you love and, and the moments that you're, you're in. Okay, listen, 40% of people, when they say 40% of the people can't cover a 400 emergency expense without going into debt, that's not freedom, okay? That's, that's a burden. That's a level of financial stress that's going to take a toll on their relationships, on their health and their wallet, but it more importantly on the experiencing of life. And we need to fix that. That's one of the reasons that I do what I do is because I truly believe financial freedom is your birthright. And I just want to help people claim it. And for some crazy reason, our school system, our system do not want to have conversations around money. They do not want to teach about money. And you know what? It isn't complicated, but they make us think it is. It's simple. When you understand the processes, when you understand what you need, it's, it doesn't mean that it's easy. Don't confuse simple and easy. But we need to be in the game. So I'm going to give you some three things that I want you to focus in on. Aside from the gratitude, aside from the generosity that I gave in this one. And that is start to look at ways to say, how do I pay myself first? It's cliche almost. But you know what, let's ask it another way. How do you make yourself and your future a priority? And the way to do it is in the wealth priority ladder that I talk about in chapter 12 of my book. I want you to start putting money away 20 to 25%. Now, you may not be able to do that right now. That's okay. Start with 3%, start with fiber. Start with what you can, start exercising it and then put it on automatic, put it on autopilot, automate the savings and investing so you will automatically put yourself first you get a chance. I was talking to a client, I was doing their. Their money. I do these money machine master plans where I literally build out their financial plan for. For their retirement. And going into retirement, whether they're 30 years old, whether they got stuff or they don't have stuff, we build it out, we stress test it, we test it. We run Monte Carlo simulators. I mean, when to take Social Security, what kind of insurance. We do all of that work for them. So they have this built out, detailed plan. And he was one of those people that would invest and who invest because he was told to, but he never paid attention to it. Never paid attention to it. And he. When we started looking, I said, let's pull it all out and let's look at it, you know, because he paid himself first, because he made it a priority. And he just took care of it without even looking at it. He. He ended up in a place where he's got $700,000 put away and he didn't even know it until I forced him to look at it. Now, it's been years, but the bottom line is now he's got a very directed strategic plan that will turn that into millions over the next couple of years, next number of years, as we go. So that you hear, pay yourself first. Let me say it another way. Put yourself first. Make yourself a priority, because you should be.

The second thing I want you to do is make sure you have what we call a peace of mind fund, that emergency fund, so you don't end up part of the statistics of 40% who can't pay a $400 unexpected bill. I want the emergency fund somewhere between nine and 18 months, depending on your circumstances. I talk about it in the book, so you can do that. And I actually have an episode where we talk. I talked about how to build an emergency fund in more detail. So you'll understand why I say nine to 18 months. If you go to that episode but build that emergency fund, you're gonna find that it gives you the peace of mind to know that you're okay no matter what happens. Okay? And number three is invest for the long term. This isn't about tomorrow. You're not going to. This isn't. I call it the beanstalk syndrome, you know, Jack and the Beanstalk, that old story. He would toss the. Toss the beans out the window. Woke up the next morning, the beanstalk was completely full grown. That's not what happens with our investments, okay? It takes time. We plant the seeds, we nurture the seeds, we keep planting the seeds. We keep nurturing and fertilizing the seeds. It invests for the long term. Okay. And know that over the long term, you will build wealth. Remember, your wealth doesn't go, doesn't grow in a straight line. It grows exponentially. But we have to eat up the wealth flat line. That beginning stage when you're putting money away and it feels like you're not making progress, you are, you're compressing the spring and it's going to rock it up when you hit the tipping point, the acceleration zone, as I call it. Okay, so, so get those things in place to start. That's the first place to start. And, and then let's talk about legacy because I talk about it a lot and I look at it very differently than, than anyone else. And this is a perfect time of year for you to look at this. Legacy is not something that we leave behind. For me, we don't build assets and they, and then give it to them because that's really, isn't legacy. There's just stuff, you know, we literally had to clean out my mom's, you know, place. There was a lot of stuff there.

Lord knows how does a 90 plus year old woman in an assisted living collect all that stuff she did? But the point is, is this. The legacy wasn't in the stuff. The legacy was in the memories, the connection points and everything she did while she was alive. See, we think that legacy is something that is something we leave behind when we're gone. But I think legacy is the thing that we leave within someone while we're alive. And so every moment as you're going through this season, make it matter, make those moments matter. To know that this moment is a legacy moment. This moment, if you say the right thing, you do the right thing, or you acknowledge them by looking in their eyes, you might change their life, you might change their day, you might change their perspective. Legacy is about the values you live by, the relationships you nurture, the impact you have right now.

Legacy is not what you leave for people. Legacy is what you leave in people. And every time you show kindness, every time you offer help, every time you show the generosity, the gratitude, every time you give without expecting anything in return, you're building your legacy. It's not about leaving money behind. It's not about the trust. It's not about the wills, about the memories. It's about the lessons. It's about the love that people will remember. I think that's the way we need to look at this in everything we do to build Our money machine, everything we do to build our wealth should be driven by generosity, gratitude, and legacy. So ask yourself.

What do I want to be remembered for?

What do I want to be remembered for? And then live that legacy every single day. Whether it's through your generosity or your gratitude or the way you just interact and care about people, your legacy can be created today. In each day, in each moment, when you give the reverence to the moments that the moments deserve, you create legacy. So this was a special episode I just felt on my heart to do. Not necessarily the typical episode, but I think it's important for us to revisit and look at that. That we don't build wealth without building richness. We don't build wealth without connecting it to our life. And so in this last little piece, I just want you to reflect during this holiday season, to look at and say, what truly matters, what do I truly am I thankful for? And know that you'll never find that in your bank accounts. You'll find it in your heart, in your soul, and in how you give back the moments that you share. See, we create. All right, remember, financial freedom isn't about numbers only. It is about creating a life where you can live generously, with gratitude and with purpose. So start today. Let's take the steps together to build that wealth, but to build the rich life. And you don't have to do it alone. I'm here with you. All right. I'm wishing you, your family, a holiday season that is filled with love, filled with gratitude, filled with generosity, filled with the richness of the moments. And I hope to see you on another episode or on the road to financial freedom. And until I do, as I always say, always strive, live a life that lives you. Until next time, I'm Mel Abraham. Let's build a life. Thank you for listening to the affluent entrepreneur show with me, you, your host, Mel Abraham. If you want to achieve financial liberation to create an affluent lifestyle, join me in the affluent entrepreneur Facebook group now by going to melabraham.com group and I'll see you there.

And that's it for this episode of building your money machine, where we help you learn how to master your money, eliminate financial stress, and live a life of choice. If you found this valuable or helpful to you, here's what I'd love for you to do. If you do me a favor, go to Apple, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you're listening to this podcast and rate and review the show. It helps us tremendously to keep us at the top of the list so we can continue to get this information and this message out to people. Because I truly believe that financial freedom is your birthright, and I want to help each and every one of you claim it. Thanks so much.