016. Her Journey to The Empowered Woman with Marta Spirk

Welcome.

I am marketing expert and business coach Melissa Kellogg Lueck. And this is the Doing Business Like a Woman podcast, where we are exploring and teaching you how women are reinventing the way business is done and money is made to help you create greater impact and financial freedom one business at a time. Well, hello, hello and welcome to the podcast. We have a very special episode for you today. I have invited my friend Marta Sperk as our guest today, and she is a brand new author of the book the Empowered the Ultimate Roadmap to Business Success. So she is such a beautiful and wonderful example of what's possible for us as women entrepreneurs. And so I'm so excited to have her here. And Marta, can you please just introduce yourself to the audience and we'll dive right in?

Yes, of course. Well, thank you so much for having me. It's my honor and pleasure to be here and chat with you today. My name is Marta Spurg. I'm an empowerment coach and marketing strategist. And my focus really is helping women show up, speak up, step up, understand that they are allowed to take up space, space in the world, become visible, talk boldly about what they have to offer, share their gifts, because this is what we're here for, right? And increase confidence using personal growth and personal development tools and also specific marketing strategies that will get you more exposure, that will get you seen, get you trusted, and get you paid. Awesome.

So I can't wait to talk to you about your new book because it's. I've been following your book launch journey and so what can you tell us a little bit about your book, how that came to be, and maybe a little bit about your story. You have such a wonderful story and I've loved hearing all about it, but can't wait to ask you more questions about it, too.

Yes, of course. Well, the book really is my entrepreneurial journey in a nutshell. It's. I talk a little bit about my. My beginnings, you know, where I grew up, being born in Brazil, having this obsession with the American culture, getting married with an American, moving to the US and then plot twist, having triplets. That's really what launched me into this entrepreneurial journey. And I talk a lot about the Enneagram in the book. Before we started recording, you told me that you're also an enneagram. An enneagram 3, which I know you understand. Many people do not, but I believe you as a three would understand why I would start a business right after having triplets. And it's been a lot of unpacking like why? Why would you do that? Because there was a lot of resistance around me, especially from family. People outside of my family were celebrating me because they're like, how in the frickin world, Marta. And you know what's going on? How can you juggle all the things? But with my family it's like, I don't think this is the right time. What are you doing? You know? And for me it's like, this is what I need. This is the outlet that I need. This is how I'm going to make this journey back to myself and find who I truly am, to be able to show up fully as a mother. And the alternative for me really was starting a business, which sounded crazy. But in the book I outlined how I found this need after becoming a mom to triplets. To understand my purpose and understand my calling. It was like this urgency of I don't get to do over. It's all happening at the same time. So I got to figure it out and I got to figure it out. Now obviously it was years, right? My, as we're recording this, actually my, my babies are about to turn six and it's. It's been this entire journey. And I talk a lot about the double whammy of starting a business and being a mom, like first time mom at the same time in triplet mom. Because lots of the emotions are very similar. Of allowing yourself to be a beginner, of not knowing what you're doing, feeling like you're failing, feeling like you're falling short, feeling like you're behind. I mean that's what we do a lot when we become moms. We're comparing with other people's journeys and as business owners, same exact thing. So it was really like I was doing. I should have picked up a third thing so that it could be all in threes. Because it was motherhood, business and you know, whatever else. Because it was all of this craziness at the same time. But it was really what helped me make more sense and be more mindful about what I was doing. Not just living out of autopilot. And I know that using especially the tool of the Enneagram has allowed me to reflect more. Why is it that I'm feeling this? Where is this coming from? Can I lean into this to understand and make the most out of this experience? So many of the triggers that happened in the happen in the journey of comparison, of jealousy, of resentment, all of these things that started surfacing because I was in this journey of sharing about my life as an entrepreneur. In the online space, I was really challenged to understand what was going on with me. And this is the story of the book is what are all of these feelings? Because, you know, with the subtitle of the book being the Ultimate Roadmap to Success, a Business Success, you may think I'm talking numbers and I'm talking strategy, and I'm not. I feel like that's the second step. The first step, the foundation really is what's going on inside of you. Why do you want this? Who are you doing this for? Is it to impress people? Is it really? Because that is your calling and you're moving forward to finding your gifts. And these are the reflections that I went through and that I now encourage women and that I have been encouraging my clients for the last few years to go through to understand we're constantly looking outside of ourselves for the strategy, for the magic pill that's going to get us to success. And really the message of the book is stop wasting your time. Look within instead. That's the path. That's the journey that will lead you to success.

Oh, I love that. It's so good. And I really resonate with that journey because that was very similar to me. How? I mean, I didn't have triplets, thank God. But I really in the struggled with. When I decided to really grow and scale my business, I really struggled with getting all that input from the outside and doing all the strategies. And here's my three.

Right.

Doing it all and doing it perfect. Right. And still it not working because of what was going on inside of me and that low self esteem and just not having the confidence and not really owning my worth and what I had to offer. Right. And that's such a important part of the journey. And so I'm thinking about you starting a business with triplets. I mean, that's like from the frying pan into the fire. Right. And what were some of the lessons that you learned? Like just calibrating. I mean, even now your kids are still young and they still require a lot of attention. And your business requires a lot of attention too, because it's a baby. It's almost like you had quadruplets. Really?

Yes. And now with the book, it's like quintuplets. It just, I keep adding stuff.

Another baby. You love babies. So what are the lessons that you learned? I'm like, where is the hack that would, you know, really allow you to have all of this going on? And really, I mean, look at you. You're beautiful. You're not wrinkled and Gray and, like, stressed out looking like, you know, you. You are so elegant at how you've grown this and been able to really grow your family and your business. So give us all the secrets.

Yeah. So I think the easiest way is for me to break down the five steps that I outline in the book. But one thing that comes to mind that I actually just heard, and we're both part of the networking company Polkadot Powerhouse. And just yesterday we had a meeting and a fellow sister, as we like to call them, said, the more I take care of myself, the more money I make. And I am like, my gosh, if that doesn't encapsulate the entire thing of, you know, look at yourself. And that is a lot of what I talk about. Look at yourself. Notice yourself. Listen to yourself. The more you do that, the more you are looking within and not looking without, the more room you give and you create for your business to grow and for everything in your life to grow. And so the very first lesson really is treating your relationship with yourself as the foundation to every relationship in your life. That meaning your spouse, relationship with your spouse, relationship with your kids, with your family, relationship with clients, with mentors, with everybody. It really is a reflection of how you feel about yourself. And that's why I bring in the enneagram in this first step, because it's the first really step for you to see yourself. And one of the things that I say is that the best gift you can give to the people you love in your life is to be yourself 100%. And most of us are not ourselves 100% because we're constantly thinking we need to add something or subtract something, like, it's not good the way that it is, because we're comparing to other people and we're thinking, this is who I should be in order to be successful or in order to be loved and accepted by others. And my first lesson, my first suggestion is notice yourself. The same way as I like to compare it with a crush. All of us have had several crushes throughout life, and it begins with you noticing them. They stand out somehow, right? And we start paying attention to little quirks. We become interested in, when's your birthday, what's your favorite color, whatever it is, why don't we take the time to do that with ourselves? So that's the first thing is really start falling in love with who you are and falling in love with the journey that is getting to know yourself, because it's not in one day. Same thing with any relationship you're not going to learn everything about a person in one day. It takes years. And even being married for several years, you still learn new things about each other. So it's the same exact thing. The second lesson is listen to yourself. And that is something that I use in parallel with the Enneagram. Because we all have negative feelings and negative self talk, but the negative self talk presents itself in different ways to different people. In general terms, we all feel like we're not enough. But every person that has specific Enneagram types, and that's what I describe in the book, has a different thought that keeps playing over and over and over in their heads. And that's what conditions their behavior. That's what conditions their actions and the way they interact with people. Now, if you start paying close attention to what that little record that is playing in your head says, then you can be more mindful on how to change that, on how to shift that, how to catch yourself and then realize, oh, I'm doing it again. How can I turn this into more positive? Because maybe you have been, you know, doing affirmations or whatever it is practice, personal development practice that is always very helpful, but it's not specific to that Achilles heel, to that thing that you tend to feel. And one of the things that I describe in the book is that I believe it has a lot to do with childhood wounds. Things you heard and that you started, you subconsciously kept repeating to yourself and kept believing in. Even if you know it's not true, it's what you conditioned yourself to believe in because you were told that or because you felt that in a specific moment in your life. And it's not true anymore, but for whatever reason, you're still believing it. So another lesson is reframing that, acknowledging it and reframing it, then forgiving yourself for it. Because when you see all these things that are not so pretty about yourself, it's very tempting to be like, I suck. There's no hope for me. But the whole point of seeing yourself, it's. And through the Enneagram as well, is understanding that there are several other people out there in the world who think and feel very similarly to you. That helps you feel like you belong, like you're not this alien that struggles with these feelings. Right. And then I have the two other steps. But I want to allow you some time to talk as well, because I could go on.

No, I know. And it's so. It's so important. And I love that you are. Have written this book and are bringing this to the awareness, because I think that, that this is not something we were taught. Like, I wasn't taught this.

No.

As a young person, I wasn't taught, you know, how to care for myself by my, by the women in my life. Like, you know, we were always conditioned to care for others in our lives and not really think about ourselves and care for ourselves. And obviously we're not taught this in business school, that the way to grow a business is to take care of yourself, you know, and make sure you're having fun. And so I just love that, that you are involved in this work and I love hearing you talk all about it. And so maybe talk a little bit more about your steps because I think, you know, it is so important.

Yeah, definitely. Well, and that's exactly like you said. It seems unusual. And even to some, they feel a little reluctant to dive into this because it's like, oh, it's too abstract, it's too woo, Give me the tangibles, give me the specifics. And that's exactly where we fall short, because we're shying away from this work because it's uncomfortable, because we're going to be seeing things that we're not going to be very happy about. But that's exactly why we need to do it, so that we can acknowledge them, forgive ourselves for these things. And the following lesson or step is empowering yourself. And you can't really empower yourself until you see all of this, because once you acknowledge your weaknesses, you are then more capable and able to acknowledge your strengths as well. You can't have light without dark. Right. And you can have dark without light. They have to be together so that you can acknowledge both. And so this whole process of acknowledging the negative self talk, the weaknesses, your shortcomings, is the very thing that helps you see your strengths in a better light. And then you can pat yourself on the back and then you can celebrate yourself for the big and the small things. And one of the things that I talk about in this specific step is what I encourage is a practice of a brag book. Because gratitude journals have, you know, are just wide and spread every. I would say everyone, for the most part knows what that means. But you will notice you're hardly never in it.

Yeah.

Grateful for stuff. We're grateful for things outside of ourselves. And so the BRAC book and this empowerment practice is you taking the time to pat yourself on the back to really remind yourself. No, I'm proud that I put the laundry away. I'm proud of the small things because again, we're constantly waiting for other people to acknowledge that. And then we feel good, but we can't control that. Right. Those things are supposed to be a bonus. We need to be in control. And that's really to me what empowerment means is you taking responsibility for the things you can't control instead of living out of a victimhood self state and pointing fingers and expecting things from others. And finally, that's what lead us to transformation. That's the final step and lesson which is transform yourself. And the reason why I have that last is because that's usually where we want to jump to. We want to skip all the steps and be like, I want to transform. But what's interesting is that once you start going through those four steps first, your idea of transformation changes. Not just I want to be this other person, it's like no man, I want to be more of myself because that is where it is at and that is the only thing really I can't be. So why not take the time to do that? So to me, transformation, the definition of transformation is becoming a more self accepting version of who you are. And again, when you talk business, so many business coaches and mentors talk about being authentic. Just be yourself. And that is wise advice. But that's the hardest advice because the majority of people do not know who they are. So how can you be something you don't know? Most often we hear that and we're like, sweet, I got this one down. I can't be anybody else. But you're not really being yourself, so that doesn't help. So this whole journey and these five steps is the process of really being who you are. What does that look like? Let me be that unapologetically and then be this role model for people to be who they are as well, not to be who you are. Because then once you are in front of people and you're create this platform, especially with business, many people start looking up to you and they start thinking they need to be you. They need to follow the exact same footsteps. And what I outline is that we all have our very unique and personal journey. And that's another huge lesson for business. The more you can put the blinders on in the sense of this is my journey. Yes, learn from mentors. Yes, be humble and understand you don't know everything. And that's another sticky point because it's like I'm being humble here. So then I need all the help, everyone needs to tell me what to do. You don't trust your, your own voice and your own intuition. That's a problem as well. So it's this balance and this combination of self trust, but also being humble and learning from others. Yeah, I love that.

I think that's so great. Just really is such a. The process is so grounding and so, I don't know, I just feel like it's so inward and peaceful. Right. Like that process of always trying to grab everything from outside of us is. Is very graspy and insufficient kind of that not enoughness. Right. And that is such a. And it's a journey. It's not something where, you know, you just flip the switch. It really, for me at least, has been a journey of getting to know myself and getting to forgive myself for my shortcomings and. And really learn to take care of myself so that I can trust myself. Right. So. And I love the way you talk about, you know, providing for ourself, for ourselves, what we're expecting other people to. And as entrepreneurs, it's very. Not very often that people pat us on the back, so we're the ones that have to pat ourselves on the back. And I think the way that you talk about. It's so important for us to really let ourselves off the hook and pat ourselves on the back, because I think we're conditioned culturally to think that the harder we are on ourselves, the better we'll become.

Totally.

But that is not true. That's not how it works. And, you know, I thought that for many, many years in my business that the more I, you know, crack the whip on myself, the better I'm going to become, but that's just not the case. And so. And we think if we go easy and appreciate ourselves, that we'll just, you know, end up sitting on the couch eating bonbons and watching Netflix. And sometimes we might. And that's okay.

And that's okay. Exactly. And I think that also varies from type to type, like when we're. And one of the reasons why I believe I feel so called to do this work is because when you dive into the definition of the threes and the main motivations and the behaviors, I feel like it encompasses the epitome of I need to do all of the things and nothing's ever good enough. Which, there's a lot of that in entrepreneurship. So it's like, if there's anyone in the world that understands the struggle of not enoughness is the three. And so it can really teach some valuable life lessons to the other ones and be like, hey, I've. I've been down that road. It's not the right path. Let me save you some time.

Right. We've been there. Like, that's where we're experts at that.

Yes, totally.

Yeah. And I think that not enoughness and that scarcity is really such an epidemic among entrepreneurs, but even in our world. Right. I mean, could you imagine what our communities, our world would be like if we all felt completely sufficient and there was no scarcity? Like, if we just put that out of our vocabulary.

Yeah.

How much generosity and giving and serving and loving would there be? And I really feel like that starts with us. Like, starts at home.

Yeah. It starts individually, and then that's when what I was saying of you becoming a role model to other people, and this is something that I've been learning with mentors as well. Mentors that are not afraid to refer. Are not afraid to hire their own clients or have clients hire clients. When you see that those things, you start understanding that that's a possibility for me too, because I feel like there's a huge resistance. There's just like, what you're saying, it's a conditioning of, I need to work really, really hard to get this. And then when you see somebody that is actually enjoying their lives, that's taking time with their family, it's almost like deep within, we want it, but we don't think it's possible. And if we really believe that they are actually living that, because, you know, especially with social media, it's like, maybe they're not and it's. And it's fake or. But if. If it's really true and if we really believe it, but it's not possible for me. It's not my reality. I have to work really, really hard. And I think a lot of this journey is seeing these role models, seeing these inspirations first, not feeling jealous. Right. But then seeing that if they're living it, then that means I can do it too. It's. It's available for me as well. So how do I reach that space? And you reach that within first, and then it shows itself outwardly.

Yeah. And then you are developing your own brand, like your own. Very unique. You know, the more we get to know ourselves, that's really how I believe we stand out.

Like, yes.

A lot of times, you know, in conventional marketing wisdom, you're taught that your niche comes from outside of you, from picking the people and the interests and the demographic that want you. But I've really learned and turned that on its head that our niche comes from us internally. Like, our uniqueness will attract our best clients. And so the more we let that shine and get to know it. Really.

Yeah, yeah. And then it becomes less of a struggle. And it's so amazing how it's such a parallel to your own personal growth journey. Of what I usually teach and say when I'm talking about the Enneagram is that most of our lives, we work against ourselves. It's like we're swimming against the current constantly. We have these desires, we have these gifts, and it's like we're constantly smothering it and shutting it off. Like, no, no, no, no, no. It has to be like this other person. It has to be like this other person. And then finally, and I feel like for women, a lot of it happens once we become moms is like, I don't have time for this. And I think as we get older, too, it's like, I don't have time to try to be something else. I'm just going to be who I am. Because it's been so long, you know, and you're finally tired of putting on the masks, and you're like, let's just embrace who this is. And then you start seeing people being interested in who you are and attracting these people that you jive with. And it's like, what happened? Well, you happened.

Yeah, I know. That's so beautiful. Because it's so true that the more that we allow our authentic selves to shine and the more we get to know our authentic selves, we attract people that. And clients that we just love working with.

Yes, yes.

Because they're attracted to the real us. And so it's. Yeah, it's beautiful. That's such a beautiful way to build a business. And. Yeah. I've been in business over 16 years, and I wish I would have known this. I wish I would have had someone like you in my life, like 10 years ago.

Right? Yeah. And as a three. Oftentimes, I wish I would have gotten this message years ago as well. But now I embrace that. I needed this journey, I needed these lessons to be able to compile all of this and help people with the shortcuts. But that's the beauty of it. Right. It took me years, and I feel like there's so much more substance to it because it's like, I've been through some things, and here it is. There's proof. Yeah.

And that's great. I mean, our. Our journey really is. Becomes our. The gifts that we can offer others and the way we serve others. Yeah, I love that. So speaking of journeys, I want to hear about the Book launch journey and the book writing journey. I mean, I've always, I've been a writer my entire life, but I was always like, well, I'll never write a book. It's too hard, it takes too much time. I have nothing to say. So.

From A three to A three, let me, let me just share something with you. Well, I worked with writing a lot of my life as a translator, working with languages, helping students with, you know, personal statements and things like that. And then once I started my business, I, I really didn't want to do it because I am just such a, like, action oriented. And I don't like overthinking and taking too long. I'm not attention to detail. I just want to get things done and do it. I'm not a perfectionist in that sense. And that's why I started a podcast right at the beginning of my business, because it's like, I don't have to get dressed, I don't have to look fancy. I just start talking, put it out there, it's done. And it was a way of me really processing information and really learning because I feel like I'm a lot more of a speaker than a writer in that sense. And so I connected with several authors. It was in 2019, and the idea of, okay, maybe I could have something to write about. I actually started jotting down some stuff in May of 2020. And then I started working with a business coach who has published nine books, is an international speaker, And I really saw myself in him a lot. And I knew that this was a step. And one of the very first things that he said when we started working together was, you need to publish a book. And I was like, I don't know what to say, blah, blah, blah. And then he shared with me that he couldn't bring himself to write. So what he did was he recorded himself and had somebody transcribe and make sense of it. So after he gave me that tip, I was like, that's why I've been dragging my feet. I just need to speak this because it's podcast style. So I already had my framework of the five steps and I was like, this is what the book is going to be about. It's going to be. And that that was a very valuable tip that I received from this business coach as well, was that don't try to make this a bible of all of the learnings involved, of the things. Keep it brief, because it's going to be a marketing piece. And that was so valuable to me because the people I connected with before, had memoirs and autobiographies, and I thought that that's the route I needed to go. So that was keeping me a little stuck because I felt like my story wasn't over. This isn't a good point for me to just put something out there and never would be a good point until I was dead, probably in my mind, it's like, it's not. It's not. It's not good enough. It's not good enough. It's not, you know, substantial enough for me to put anything out there. But once he framed it as, this is just going to be a piece and you can publish several books, like, he planted these seeds in me of, this is just an introduction to you and to your coaching into your business. This is. It's not going to make you like J.K. rowling. It's going to be part of your marketing. I was like, all right, I can do that. That's less daunting, right? And so I started recording each of the chapters. I hired a ghostwriter, and I had her start typing it out and making sense of it. So not just transcribing word for word, but making sense of all the stuff that I was saying. And I was still kind of dragging my feet with that as well, because then I was busy with. With business. I know lots of it was excuses. And then I went through several programs with a mentor that works a lot with the subconscious mind and understanding, you know, subconscious blocks, mindset blocks and all of that. And I remember last year, during the summer time, doing one of these programs, she asked the question that I'd heard a million times, I mean, in this space was, what would you do if you weren't afraid? Like, super basic. But for the first time, I actually had a very specific answer that came like, just like that, I would publish my book. And I understood that it was a fear that I had of really committing to my business, of putting something out there that would be representative of me and being afraid of judgment. And I think as a three, you know, like, what. What if this is not a huge success? What if, what if? All the thoughts in my mind, you know, and I was like, no, this is what I need to do. I need to go against this fear and I need to believe. And that is something that I have been saying, is that there was a lot of imposter syndrome. There was a lot of second guessing through this whole process. I mean, putting myself on the COVID like, there's so much of it that I really wanted that I. That I. It was a choice. It wasn't that somebody forced me to do it. That does not mean that I wasn't scared. That does not mean that I wasn't second guessing myself, you know, but ultimately I had to decide that I am this woman. Uh, even when my, when I kept telling myself, who are you? Who are you to be doing that? And when my business coach suggested that the subtitle is the ultimate roadmap to business success, my gosh, that scared the living crap out of me. Who are you to be telling people that this is the ultimate, you know, all of this? And that's why I knew I needed to put it out there, to go against this fear, to tell myself, I am this woman. This is the roadmap. I am not lying. This is, this is the story, you know, and this is what we do with business too. So that's why this is so representative, not only of my journey, but a testament of the possibilities for women out there. That, and this is something that I want to share more boldly is the fear that I had to overcome to put this out there. It wasn't just like, oh, let's do this. Two days, it's ready. Because many people ask, what was the journey like? You know, how long did it take? And really, it doesn't have to take long. If you have everything in place. It could take like three, four months if you just sit down. If you're disciplined, I'm going to write 2000 words a day type thing that you hear some people do. What really goes on is the mindset piece. You know, it's not. I mean, obviously the budget, the people you're working with, time wise, all of that. But at the end of the day, it's that decision of, I am this person, I'm committed to this work. It's not just a post that can be deleted or a story that goes away in 24 hours. It's in print. It's my face, it's my name, it's out there.

Yeah. So does that fear ever go away?

Oh, that's a very good question. Well, I feel like with anything in this journey is different layers of it, right? It starts feeling different. And that's something that this mentor mine have said. Whenever I step on stage, there's still a little bit of that nervousness, but I have those first few words that I need to speak and then it starts flowing. And I've heard this from several performers and people out there. I still get nervous, I still get jittery, you know, or whatever. But it's learning to be comfortable with the uncomfortable. I mean, this is entrepreneurship. This is motherhood. This is. All of it, is choosing the uncomfortable, knowing that you're going to be okay. Like, telling yourself, yeah, the water's really, really cold, but after a minute, for a few seconds, I'll be okay. It's just that first initial shock.

Yeah. And I think that really is what separates in my mind, people that dabble in entrepreneurship and those that become extremely successful is not abilities or education or skill level. It's all, how uncomfortable are you willing to be? And how are, you know, what are all those tough emotions that you're willing to feel? And so, you know, for the first 10 years of my business, I was not willing to feel failure, humiliation, you know, disappointment. So I stayed small because then I didn't have to feel any of that hard stuff. But then when you step out, like, you have to write a book and put it in print, you know, in black and white.

Yeah.

And feel all of that, and you were willing to forgive, feel all of that tough stuff and still move through that, and you grow. I think we grow in our tolerance to those feelings. Not that they ever go away like that. The fear doesn't go away, but I can tolerate it.

Yes.

And I know that I'm going to live. Like, our bodies tell us, you're not going to live. You're probably going to die.

Yeah, that's exactly what it is. It's just building up that tolerance. And how I forget. I saw a quote not too long ago that said that your amount of healing, the level. The level of healing that you experience is directly proportionate to the amount of rejection or criticism or judgment that you're willing to withstand. And that's really what it is. You say you're keeping yourself small. Why you were shielding yourself from feeling those feelings. When you come to a point that it's like, no, I can take it. It's not going to be easy, but I can take it. I mean, everything starts opening up.

Yeah, totally. And we think that staying in that safe space, staying inside the cave, so to speak, is easier and feels better, but it actually is miserable. Right. Because if we're not stepping into our authentic selves and living our purpose and, you know, pushing our. Our abilities to the boundaries.

Yeah.

You know, that's really where we're the most alive. Right.

Totally.

But we think staying in the cave is going to be easier, but it actually is much.

It's not.

It's awful.

It's the infamous choose your hard yeah, it's all going to be hard. Don't just think you're going to coast through life. Like, that's not. Because even if you are coasting, that's also hard because you're going to be miserable, just like you said. And one of the things that I said, like, the day when I was like the day of, and I was messaging people and people were messaging me, and I was like, oh, my gosh, this took an insane amount of courage. And I kept thinking, like, if you want to be scared crapless, publish a book. But if you also want to be overwhelmed with love and support and with gratitude, publish a book. So it's like, love that. It's chills.

That's so good. I love that. That's amazing. Yeah. So I love how you say that. It was on one of the lives that I watched that you did on Facebook and that that fear held you back for so long in publishing the book. And. And it was all your breakthrough kind of happened when you were asked, if you weren't afraid, what would you do? And so now I ask you, what is your next. If you weren't afraid, what would you do?

Oh, my gosh. Well, I once I was in the process with the editor and we were cutting out stuff and being like, no, this sentence or this paragraph or whatever does not fit in here. This is not the topic. I was like, oh, so this is a second book. But I mean, I'm not saying I'm going to do this right now or when exactly it is, but I know a next step is focusing more on the strategic, potentially tangible part of business. Like what I was saying, people will see this title and they're going to think, oh, you're going to give me some numbers. You're going to give me some specific, like, content marketing steps. And it's not. And so. But a lot of my business has evolved to get to the tangibles because I know people connect more with that. And the tangible result of I'm going to help you create content, I'm going to help you attract more clients. That's what we all want, but we don't necessarily want the uncomfortable what we were just talking about. So that's why I had to start there. So a next step would be to focus on the marketing piece more specifically in terms of visibility and how to showing up fully and talking about your offers without fear that you're being too much or that people are not going to sign up or whatever it is. So that's definitely a thing. Something else that I'm still in the process of going through is that I'm going to be presenting at TEDx in March of this year. Yeah. So that's a huge one too. And I know a lot of this has opened up because of me stepping out in faith with the book. And I'd applied before. I had been called out for an addition before that. I couldn't make it because it was in Grand Junction three hours away. My babies weren't even two years old, so I had to decline, which was such. So heartbreaking. But I know that I'm more ready now than I was then and everything has come together, especially with the book coming out, that the message of my talk is going to be very connected with the book, which is my life story anyways. So I'm still coming to terms and practicing because I know stepping up on that stage and talking about all of this is going to be definitely. If you weren't afraid, what would you do? Moment. And for the future, really I want to have live events that's been in my heart since forever is having wide, large, national, international conferences for women where we share this message of empowerment, where we bring more women to expand on specific topics of business and entrepreneurship and share their gifts. Because this is what I'm doing with my business. But I know it's going to be a larger scale. And I was just having a meeting with my strategist yesterday and she was telling me about numbers and all the things and I started seeing that again. We compare our businesses with other businesses and it's like, oh, they're so successful and they barely have a team. You know, they just work from their office. And for me, I'd always had this vision of a huge corporation. I'm not a one woman show. And as a three that you may resonate. It's like, I don't go small. This is not who I am in anything. It has to be extravagant and has to be ridiculously huge. So I am gearing up to building something astronomical. And that is scary. But it's what I'm called to do. So that's the future steps.

Yeah, I love that. I totally, I'm 100% supportive that. I mean, can you imagine a world of women entrepreneurs and the economy that we would create and build? Having everyone on board and have read your book and studied your process and going out and building businesses like that, it just.

Oh my gosh, it gives me chills. You're creating the imagery in my head. I love it.

Yeah, let's do it. Let's do it. Another part of you that is important, I think, is to talk about your music. Tell us about that.

Oh, thank you so much for bringing that up. It gives me chills too. So that is something that is near and dear to my heart. It's something that I share just a little bit in the book. How languages and music were one of the ways that I felt, how I could express myself and that I feel are very much connected because they're so personal and they're so individual and they're so detailed, they're so rich. You know, languages, people in general, because music and languages are a reflection of people, of our amazing psyche, our brains and all of that, of creativity. And I'd been for the longest time trying to figure out how I would infuse music in my coaching. And I tried in very small ways before, but because like I said, I don't go small. I was like, this is the time I'm unleashing all the things. So with the publishing of the book, I had actually a mentor suggest this to me and said, why don't you record a song for each of the Enneagram types? Why don't you write a song? And at first I was like, I love this idea. But then I was caught up in the details. The details always overwhelm me. I'm like, it has to be the simplest possible. So I decided that it would be more of like mantra affirmation songs and that I was just going to write the lyrics and sing to like royalty free tracks. So I didn't compose the music or any of that because that would be way too much work. And I'm like, no, I need to do this sooner and simpler. So what is the simplest way that I can do that? So even though I do, I do play the piano. I had never composed anything myself or written anything myself. And so come to find out, my voice coach is also a songwriting coach. And we knocked out all the songs in like a few sessions. And I'm so proud of this work because that is something that has been in my heart after, like the ending of last year. Gearing up to a new year is paying closer attention to what I'm consuming, what I'm filling my mind with. Because the world is such a sad, scary, dark place right now. There's so much bad news, there's so much confusion. And, you know, I find myself going down the rabbit hole, not only online, but watching stuff on tv. And I wanted to be more mindful of the books I'm reading, the people I'm surrounding myself with. And so creating this, these tracks is kind of like my way of let me listen to this because it's super catchy because it's affirmations, but it's in singing is in song. So I've been finding myself singing it and thinking about it throughout the day. And the people that I shared this with were also like, oh my gosh, this turned my day around. I was, you know, drowning in work and this just brought me to tears and perked me up. So I'm excited to infuse that as part of an addition, an add on to the book.

That's so fun. I love it. That's so great. It's just creative like I never would have thought of. Oh, let me write some songs about this.

I know. I love the suggestion. I just ran with it.

Yeah, and I love the that you did run with it because there's a lot of times we come up with ideas and we're like, oh, it's too hard. I don't think that's, you know, no one's gonna want that, that type of thing. And then we poo poo them and put them away. But those, those urges or those nudges I think are what's most important for us to follow as we're really learning how to express ourselves.

Right? Yeah. Authentic self. And I think with the publishing of the book, and that's what they say, right. The more you listen and act on these nudges, the louder they're going to get and the harder it is going to get for you to ignore them. So you're going to act on them. And I feel like overcoming that fear of I'm going to put this book out there gave me the courage to be like, I'm just going to put all the things out there. You know, let's just do this thing.

That's so good. Okay, so as we wrap up, I want to hear how you work with clients, how we can follow you, where we can buy the book, all those good things.

Yay. Awesome. So you can find me as Marcus Burke all across social media. My website, smartsburg.com My podcast is the Empowered Woman. So that's another way to hear and learn from me. My one of my main offers is a membership called the Empowered Woman School. And as a gift for those who read the book and become part of the Empowered Woman family, you get a 30 day trial in the membership. We have several zoom coaching meetings, guest expert trainings, and the focus really is personal and business growth and if you go to free gift from Marta.com you can register, no credit card information needed. You literally just put your email on and you get added to the groups and you get access to the database of all of the trainings that are recorded on there. I also have group coaching programs that are more focused on marketing. Obviously I have the empowered women experience as part of the launch of the book where I'm going to be doing a live training each day. So it's five days of trainings breaking down each of the steps in the book. So it's really to encourage people to not just let the book collect dust or to be like, oh, this is great. Now I'm moving on with my life. Let's implement this. And then you have access to the nine songs. And I also do want to work one on one work as well.

Awesome. So good. So thank you so much for being here and we will link to your website in the show notes and all that good stuff. So feel free to find it there. But thank you so much for your time. I really appreciate you taking this time out of your busy book launch period and joining us today. And it's been so good to talk to you. I knew the first time that I saw you we were in at a virtual conference together. We were both speakers and the first time I heard you speak I was like, I need to know this girl. She's amazing. So it's been so good to get to know you and watch your journey and see the book and read the book and all the good stuff.

Thank you so much, Melissa. It's been my pleasure. So good.

Thank you. If you like this podcast and want to take this work deeper, I invite you to coach with me one on one. It all starts with a conversation. Let's get on a call together and I'd love to learn more about you and your business and together we can identify what is standing in the way of creating the business and life you envision. And then we'll create a plan to get you there. So visit my website@melissam Kellogg.com and find a spot on my calendar. I look forward to seeing you, Sam.