068. How to LOVE Your Way of Marketing

Welcome. I am marketing expert and business coach Melissa Kellogg Lueck. And this is the Doing Business Like a Woman podcast, where we are exploring and teaching you how women are reinventing the way business is done and money is made to help you create greater impact and financial freedom one business at a time. Well, hello. Hello there, ladies. I hope you're having a fabulous day full of love and joy. We're back for our next installment of our series this month on love and marketing. And last time we talked about how to love consistency. And so I hope you enjoyed that. I've gotten some, some great feedback on that. So today is a snowy, cold, windy, pretty disgusting day. So I'm glad to be indoors chatting with you today. And today I want to talk about how to love your way of marketing. And so as I was preparing for this episode, I just got so emotional because I was thinking about thinking back to when I first started my business and how I just, I don't know, I would just go back and say so many things to her, my past self, and just really encourage her that she's not always wrong or not always inadequate or not always bad at marketing or bad at building a business or bad at handling money or making money right? And so I want to just have this chat, just you and me here today. I just kind of imagine, like, we're sitting here having coffee and talking about how you can really love yourself as an entrepreneur, as a marketer, as someone building a really beautiful business. And we tell ourselves so often that we're not doing it right or that something is missing, something is wrong. And we then personalize that, right? And in our minds, it goes like, well, if my business isn't working, that means there's something wrong with me, right? Or I'm bad at this, or I don't know how to make money, or I'm bad at marketing. I don't know how to find clients. And it can be so frustrating and heartbreaking. And I think where that comes into play is that we is the personalization part of it. So there's kind of two sides of the coin. So as the CEO, we can look at things that are not going as planned in our business and evaluate them and kind of have like a scientist hat on and think about it like a scientist, right? Like we're doing an experiment, the experiment didn't work out, and we just kind of look at it with an analytical, neutral head. And I think where we. And I feel like it's as women, because I'm talking to us ladies, right? As Women, we personalize it, though, and I think that's just part of the beauty of our femininity, is that we are personal. And so there's beauty in that. But this is where it can kind of turn against us. Right. And not serve us. And. And so then we end up looking for the solution or the fix or the one right thing or the one right person to come along and tell us what to do, when in fact, we're focusing on the lack, what we're lacking, how we're inadequate, what's not working. Right. And so a little tough love for you today. I want you to know that when you're focusing on the lack, you will never create the abundance that you want in your business, in your life. And so that's what I want to address today, is for us to all grow in awareness of where we are focusing on our lack. And I'm going to teach you today how you can shift that and turn it into something that is incredibly powerful and puts you back in the driver's seat of your business and your life and your thoughts. Okay? And your results. So it's so funny because the majority of women that I talk to and have consultations with when they're curious about working with me, I am a marketing coach, and I have private clients, and I also have a group program. And so I primarily will meet with private clients before we start working together. We'll have a consultation and talk about them and their business and what their goals are and how I might be able to help them. Right. And so the majority of consults go something like this. We get. Usually it's on a zoom call. We get on a zoom call, and I'll say, so, you know, how are things going? What's going on? Tell me. Tell me all the things. And they'll start out by telling me about their business, and then they'll go into how they're. You know, they'll say to me, I'm. I don't know what I'm doing with my marketing. There's so many things I should be doing that I'm not doing. I'm doing it wrong. Something is missing. Some, you know, I must be missing something, and I need you to tell me what that is. And, you know, I don't know how to find clients. I'm not getting enough clients coming in. I'm not making enough money. And so what I'll often ask them is, okay, well, you know, then we kind of go through what is going right in their business, and we'll talk about, you know, what their goals are, what their vision is for their business, and then talk through how I can help them get there. But anytime I hear that, and I do, I even have this going on inside my head at times, right, that I'm doing it wrong. Something's missing. What am I not doing? What? Where am I not? What am I missing? What don't I know all of that? Or what is that one thing that I'm not seeing? And so I know that this is so prevalent in all of our minds, this line of thinking. And if we're thinking specifically about your marketing, because that's what we're talking about, this kind of thinking on our lack of becomes a barrier between us and our best fit client. Because if you are feeling that way, like I'm bad at marketing, I hate marketing. I don't want to do it. And then going out and doing it, forcing yourself to do it, people can't connect with that, that energy, right? They. It's a not a very attractive energy. And so I'm not bringing this up just to make something, you know, give you something else to make yourself wrong about. I just want you to have awareness. So I think this episode is a lot about just having awareness of what's going on in our mind and in our thoughts. Okay, so this is how you can shift that. And this is how, what I often do with my clients, when they are really feeling like things aren't working, going wrong and they're missing something, I'll often ask them, well, what do you love, right? What do you love about your work? What do you love about the clients that you work with and what do you love about the marketing that you're already doing and what's working? Right? Where is your business working? Because it's so easy for us to see all the things that are not working. But I like to just make this shift into what is working, what do we have, what do we have to work with here, right? And from there we can create marketing activities and strategies that really get us into a place of what we do have, what we do have to work with, what we want to build upon, what is enjoyable, what is fun, and what is actually working. Because if you have a business and obviously if you're starting from zero and you don't have clients yet, that's one thing. And that, you know, getting those first few clients coming in, I totally understand that can, you can definitely go through these feelings, right? Of I'm not doing it right or it's not happening fast enough or you know, the thinking about the lack. But if you're thinking about, if you're coming from a place of what has worked, because I would dare to bet that you have made money, you have created clients at some point, maybe not in this specific business, but in another business, in a role where you worked for somebody else, even if you sold someone on hiring you, right? You know how to create what you want in some capacity. So let's go to that place, wherever it is, and look at what is working and how can we build from there with what has worked, how can we amplify, how can we create from that place rather than from a place of it's not working or it's all wrong or I'm wrong or I'm inadequate and people will come to me like that and it's like they want me as the coach to give them, you know, tell them exactly what to do, give them the one right thing that's going to work. And what's going to work? What's the foundation of what's going to work? Because we put strategy on top of this. But the foundation of what's going to work is coming from a place of abundance, of what you already have going for you. Right? And so how do we do that? I have two steps or maybe three, I don't know. I definitely have two steps. The first step in changing this is to practice awareness. Like I talked about earlier, just thinking about shifting or just being aware of the messages and the self talk that you are having about yourself, about your abilities as a CEO, as a marketer, as a business owner. Like what are the things that you're saying to yourself? And if you're like most of us there, most of you know, the majority of the messages are around inadequacy, not being good enough. And so just have some awareness around that. Not, you don't have to judge it because we all have it. Don't make yourself wrong for that. Just say, oh, look it, there it is, I found it. Right, look at that thought. That's so interesting because we have the ability as humans to observe our own thoughts. And so that's what this step one is all about, is just learning how to observe your own thoughts. And so once you observe them, it's just like you're looking through the microscope at, you know, a petri dish. You're like, oh look, I see, I see the thing in the petri dish. So just have that awareness. And I think I know when I first started doing this work that was so transformative for me, just having the awareness and learning that I could observe my thoughts and, and observe what the behaviors that my mind was going through, right? So once you have that awareness of what you're actually thinking, those that actual self talk that's going on, then just start to ask yourself, is this really helping me or serving me? Is this help me, helping me feel great or is this thought making me feel awful? And especially, you know, specifically, I guess is what I mean to say specifically what we're talking about today. And think the thoughts that you're having about yourself and your marketing yourself as a marketer, your ability to find clients, your ability to grow your business and make money. Just start to observe those thoughts and ask yourself, is this serving me or helping me, building me up, or is this thought tearing me down and making me feel like crap? And for me, that's a lot of the thoughts that are making me feel like crap. So step two is to consider a daily practice. And this is what I do daily. And I don't always write it exactly like this, but I do every single day, observe my thinking. And especially in the morning when I get up, I can just have a little bit of awareness of, you know, what's the chatter like in my brain today, right? And if the chatter is some things that are just not serving me, I know which it usually is, then I need to just address that. And so this is how I address it or one way that I do address it. Not the exact same thing I do every day, but this is something that really, this practice, when I started doing it, really made a change in my energy, in my, you know, I was able to just really turn my business around during a really tough time back in, I don't know, 20, 21 maybe. And so since then I've just held on to this as just like my lifeline to really shifting my perspective. And so because really what we want to do is come from a place of shifting to what's going right or what we do, have how we are enough, and find all of the enoughness in ourselves and in our lives. And so every morning what I do or what I would do, what I sometimes do is spend time thinking about these four things. Number one is I list three things that bring me joy about my business, about my clients, about myself as a CEO. Just three things that bring me joy today, right now, I list three pieces of evidence, like hard evidence, actual evidence, not just airy fairy bs, but real evidence that it is working, my business is working. Just three pieces of evidence of that. Right? And then I write down three things that I'm grateful for. And then finally, three things that I would love to do today, right? That I would love to do today to get more clients or spread my message or connect with people, but just three. Three things I would love to do today. And what is. It's kind of from that spirit of what is love calling me to do? Right? And so when I do those. Answer those four questions and make those little lists, it just takes a couple of minutes, really. You could put a timer on and probably get it done in five minutes. It completely shifts your energy. And so from those thoughts and from that energy going into your day, it makes it so much easier to practice a mindset and an energy of optimism. Right? Because optimism is powerful. When we're feeling optimistic, we behave in optimistic and powerful ways. And we can create great things from that space. We can create beautiful marketing from that space as well. Because remember, marketing is just all about creating connection with people and building relationships with other humans. And so another question that I came up with, maybe this is step three in this process, but is to really just take a moment and think about who is the one person, not the sea of faceless people in your quote unquote audience or network or whatever, but think about the one person that you're doing this business for today. Who is she? Or. Or he or they. What are they feeling? What are they struggling with? What is it that you can help them with? And maybe even it's your past self. And that's where I get emotional, is like, everything I'm doing now, even recording this podcast, is because of my past self, because I want her to know that she is enough, that she has everything inside of her right now to build the business and the dream and the vision that she has inside of her, like, you are enough. You have plenty. And that the way that you're marketing, the way that you're building your business right now is beautiful. There's nothing wrong with it. And so this doesn't mean that we don't look at where what we're doing and want to improve and get better. But what I want you to begin doing is coming from a spirit of, okay, you know, I've built my business to this point. I've, you know, I want to create more. I want to help more people. I have what I have now, and I want to build upon that and come from that spirit rather than the spirit of, I'm wrong, something's wrong, there's not enough. Do you see that? Difference. Because when we come from that place of I have everything I need right now and I've built what I've built and now I'm ready to build more, it's completely different. And the marketing, the messaging, the communication that comes out of you is completely different, right? It's so much less hustle y and it's so much more focused on your best fit client and the people that you can serve and the people that you're best suited to serve. Right? So if you aren't creating the results that you want to be creating, just go back to these steps, these three steps that I talked about today and I'm going to just recap them real quick. So number one, I want you to practice awareness of just observe the thinking that's already going on in your mind. Not with judgment, but just saying, oh, that's interesting. Just curiosity, right? Have us have some curiosity and grace for ourselves. And because as entrepreneurs, of course we want more. That's why we started these businesses in the first place, right? Because we saw a need and we didn't see that need being addressed in the marketplace the way that we know is possible. We are creators. We make things possible, right? So just focus on that. Like it's okay that you haven't created everything that you want to create. You're on a journey. This is our lives as entrepreneurs, our all about being on the journey. We're never going to get to that ultimate end point. It's a journey all along the way, right? So just have that awareness, right? And then I want you to consider incorporating into your daily practice the the four areas that I talked about of listing out three things that bring you joy. Three, three pieces of evidence that it's working and three things you're grateful for and three things that love is calling you to do today. And then step three is really connect back to that one person that you are doing all of this for today. Like who? What is your why? Connect back to the why. And the one person that is a representation of your why. And it could be your past you that you want to help, right? So, and this is the work that I do with my private clients is shifting to this enoughness and this purpose. And then from there we simplify the marketing down to the most effective strategies for you and your business and the way you like to market and like to do business. Right? Because from that place we can really amplify and grow and actually have fun and love the way we market. And that's the whole purpose of this episode today. I want to just encourage you to love the way that you business, do business and love the way that you market. It doesn't mean you can't get better. There's always room for improvement. But when we come at it from a place of let's make this even better, let's amplify what's already working, then it's so much easier, more aligned, and much more effective. It works so much better and faster. So I hope this has been a helpful episode for you today and I would love to hear from you. If you have a moment, please stop on over to wherever you're listening to this podcast and review it, rate it so that we can spread this message to more wonderful women building beautiful businesses. And I love to hear from you as well on social and or if you're on my email list, please feel free to reach out to me, let me know how this episode landed with you and how I can support you in loving the way that you market and do business. All right, I hope you have a wonderful day today. Stay warm and I will see you next time. Bye. If you like this podcast, then you have got to sign up for my free on demand video training Grow youw Sales Doing what you love, where I teach you in depth my simple process that you can implement right away to harness your mindset and your skills to grow your sales to whatever level you want. So go grab that now. The link is in the show notes and I'll see you next time.