149. The Inner Work Behind Sustainable Success with Jenn Adamson

Welcome. I am marketing expert and business coach Melissa Kellogg Lueck. And this is the Doing Business Like a Woman podcast where we are exploring and teaching you how women are reinventing the way business is done and money is made to help you create greater impact and financial freedom one business at a time. Hello. Hello ladies, how are you? It is so great to be with you today and thank you for being here. I have a really guest that I can't wait to introduce you to. Her name is Jen Adamson and we work together. She was a client of mine for quite a while and I haven't seen her in a few months. So I'm really excited to have a catch up session and introduce you to her and I'll give a little bio and then invite her to add any details that I missed. So I, I read this bio and I'm like oh my gosh, you are so amazing. And you are a client of mine. Feel so honored. Jen is a leadership and organizational development expert with 17 years of experience spanning Fortune 500, consulting, healthcare leadership and national PR campaigns. A TEDx speaker and former RN leader, she guided 75 nurses through the COVID crisis, earning national recognition for retention and outcomes. Jen now partners with organizations to elevate culture, performance and innovation, helping clients achieve multimillion dollar growth. Certified in Neuro Quantum Wiring, she provides executive coaching, leadership development and high performance team programs. Welcome Jen, we're so excited to have you here.

Oh Melissa, I'm so excited to be here. Thank you. And you did fabulous. I knew you would. I would need to fill any gaps.

So as I'm reading it, I'm so interested about Neuro Quantum wiring. Tell me about that real quick.

Yeah, of course. Neuro Quantum wiring is a program I took about four years ago. Have you ever. It's now it's. Have you ever heard of Magnetic mind or Neuro Linguistic Programming? Yeah.

Yes.

Okay. Okay. So I don't know if you've ever been the recipient of Neuro Linguistic Programming or nlp. I am in no way an expert but it definitely has its roots and its connections to nlp. NLP in a lot of ways really transformed my life. I had a mentor, a few mentors before you, Melissa, who helped me to heal a lot of trauma related to and revolved around like relationships and feelings of unworthiness in relationship. And what it does is it in the best way that I can describe it is our subconscious mind is doing about 90% of the driving in our life and about 10% is our awareness, our conscious mind. But what we don't realize, and you've taught me this a lot too, in our time of you mentoring me, is that our subconscious mind is where we can hold a lot of the limiting beliefs that we have about ourselves or viewpoints of ourselves that can hold us back from taking things to the next level and reaching our goals. In nlp, the best way that I like to describe it is we open up the subconscious mind to bring some of those thoughts into the awareness so that we can start to clear those out and heal them. And so neural quantum wiring is very much in a similar sense. It doesn't take you to. We integrate NLP practices, but the whole kind of premise is we get you very relaxed. You could almost describe it as like a moment of when you're getting hypnosis and we start to open up that subconscious mind. And sometimes I have clients who may even fall asleep in the process. But what's so interesting is sometimes within days or even weeks, not always. I have clients that are just like, I don't feel that way anymore. I don't feel limited. I don't feel scared to speak up or share my voice in the meeting, or I don't feel scared to be and play at my fullest power in the board meeting. And so it's just so exciting to see how we can not even open or re traumatize ourselves. Yes. Talk therapy is so important. Other modalities are so important. We don't even need to know what the origin or the source is. We don't have to relive it. We can just relax enough to let that come to the surface to be cleared. And it's just. It's a beautiful transformation.

I love that. So cool. Yeah, I can imagine how that work would be really amazing to do and especially with professionals. So tell me who you are working with these days. Tell me about your clients.

Yeah, so historically, but your audience members don't know, this is. I've been in practice now for almost six years. And what I have found to be the thing that lights me up the most is helping leaders to, like I had said before, standing in their fullest and most genuine power and knowing that when you play to your natural strengths, talents and abilities, you can get more stuff done and go further along than if you were to be ruled by all the mental gymnastics of I'm not good enough or I'm unworthy of receiving this good thing, or I have imposter syndrome or imposter monster. And so for much of my business, I was a coach for leaders and Executives. But I have been making a pivot in the last year to help now that I see you have your own personal experience. But then once you have a really beautiful book of clients that have experience massive transformations and wonderful outcomes and things that they never even thought would be possible in this lifetime, you want to start to scale up and you want to make a bigger impact. And so I have been making the pivot to not just executive leadership coaching in the B2C model, but moving into the B2B model where I can help leaders and organizations and their teams from moving into a high functioning, into a high performing flow state. And that's what I love doing. So that's who my audience is.

Yeah. And what a classroom you have come from with being an rn, a nurse for so many years. And so tell us a little bit about that journey and how that really has informed how you now coach.

I love this question. I love this question because I'm going to bottom line at first and then I'll share more info. I believe that the only way that we will ever be able to not just reach our goals, but to sustain them is when we are regulated, our nervous systems are regulated, and we feel safe in the inner sense of the way, first and foremost. And I know that sounds wild, a lot of it you could call trauma informed as well. We will make decisions based on things that we aren't even aware of because we just can be on autopilot for so long. And so what I learned as a registered nurse, of being a nurse for nine years now, and that was my second career, I went into corporate. I was climbing up that corporate ladder so fast, hitting all my benchmarks, all my milestones, and thinking in the background. Because one of the beliefs that I had held for a really long time since I was a child was the only way you're worth anything is if you achieve and hit your results. And the only way to be happy is to be super successful and successful with everything I had. The money, the titles, the accolade, the car, the achievement a mile long. And I love those things. Don't get me wrong, I think all of those things are beautiful. They're like. But they're cherries on top of an already beautiful life. They're not. Not what define us, because those are things that are outside of us. But what I found is that every time I hit my next benchmark or my next goal, I would be happy for a moment in time and then I would just come crashing down and I'd feel empty and almost hollow. It was hollow. It was like this feeling of hollowness.

Yeah.

And I just couldn't shake off this feeling of what's going on. Why do I look so successful on paper but I don't feel fulfilled? Why don't I feel this success that I have on paper? Yeah. And that began the journey that continues up to this point and will continue on to this point. Of it all starts within. Have to learn. We cannot create anything sustainable until we first know how. Create that sense of peace and inner liberation and fulfillment within ourselves. Because we can call in a lot of things, but we will burn ourselves out. We will lose interest. We will get distracted. We will procrastinate. We'll do all the things that will keep us from either getting to the goal or sustaining that goal. And so learning, then going to India and spending six months there and learning more about human performance and gaining a deeper understanding of resilience, I realized that it's our body. It's how we feel in our bodies. Do I feel safe to show up authentically and genuine? Do I feel safe to say the thing and know that I might stumble my words? Do I feel safe to show up in this room and be me, not hide behind a mask? I have found that when we feel safe in our bodies, first and foremost, it's. I could give you all the example, the anecdotal evidence of myself and clients, and I'm sure you can too, of just how beautiful and fulfilling and luscious life feels. And why wouldn't we want to feel that way? Because I just think life is too short to not feel really great in the process of moving through our lives and our path. Yeah.

Yeah. And I think that's really a huge challenge that we as women entrepreneurs have.

Right.

Because we do strive, we want, we have big visions and big dreams. But at the same time, we have to or we want to. At least I want to enjoy the journey.

Right.

And I think that's a lot of the work that we did together. Right. Is like learning to enjoy the journey, but also being able to want the big things.

Amen. And I still find myself getting with every new level. I had a mentor who once said, what was once a ceiling is now the ground that you walk upon as you move to the next thing to shut the next ceiling that you're here to shatter. And you really taught me that. Melissa. Is that. And this is so funny. Gen 1.0 and then Gen 2.0, once I was being mentored by you. Truly, it's a that different because even Though I was coaching on the same things, I had my own blind spot. And I realized bottom lining it like at its most basic essence, I was not enjoying the process anymore. And you really helped me to reframe a lot of that. To say, listen, like, maybe you haven't hit your goals yet, but you said something and this is so interesting that it's coming up. It's always stuck with me, you said. I remember one of the first things you said to me when we first started coaching was, how can you expect yourself to be the multimillion dollar business owner before you actually become it? Like before. And what I got from that is. And I don't think you said that exactly. I can't say it as eloquently as you did, but what I got from that, how I interpreted it, was that I needed to feel what it was that I needed to feel on the inside in order for me to be it happen on the outside. You, you can't create anything in your outwardly world unless you first feel that same way on the inside. And so it made me realize it's you on the journey, Jen, to be in a multimillion dollar owner, business owner. It's the journey. It's not one day you wake up and you're there. It's what does that person do? Think, act and behave right now that gets her to that place.

Yeah.

And part of that was joy. It was the recognizing that I want to have fun in this process because I will lose interest really fast.

Yeah, totally. Yeah.

I love that.

Yeah. The creation of our big vision always starts inside the vision. It comes to us inside in our. We hold it in our hearts. But yeah. We have to become her before we actually create her on the outside.

Yeah. And it's true. Right. It's with anything in life, you have an idea. Maybe it's like just in the simplest analogy of an artist or a painter who has an idea and then he or she goes to the canvas and it's a blank canvas, but the idea is inside until you actually start to take the steps. Yeah. That picture or to paint that image that's on the inside and it doesn't. Maybe. And I think this. I guess it's coming to me. So if I may share, I think one thing I've learned in that process is like maybe I have this vision inside and maybe then I take it to the canvas. So to say the proverbial canvas. And maybe it doesn't come out quite as much as perfect air quotations around perfect of how it felt on the vision. But it's still beautiful and it's still that thing.

Yeah. I mean it is such a miracle if you think about it, to be able to envision a life. I was just talking with a client earlier today about. We were talking about her year and how this was a non revenue growth year for her. She didn't make a lot more money but she had a lot of internal growth. And she like you saw her eyes light up because as business people were like, I didn't make any more money. So it was a worthless year. Is sometimes the way our brain will think and. But we started to think about. I asked her what are there. There's a lot of other ways of growth or a lot of other markers of growth and just money. What other ways have you grown? And so we talked through that and then I saw her eyes light up and she's. Wait a second. She picked up her laptop and I'm on the zoom. And she walked around to. To her vision board and on her vision board were like five words that were the exact words that she had just said to me were her growth for the year.

Wow. Oh, I love that.

Isn't that crazy?

And that never occurs to me. Yeah. And that's how it starts. But we. I catch myself as a high achieving, logical left brain driven woman. Most of the time we. I guess I'll only speak on behalf of me. I forget that's so crucial. Yeah. You can't grow a garden that's gonna thrive and flourish and create beautiful flowers if you don't first tend to the soil and make it as fertile as possible. And a lot of that growth you don't see a lot of that growth happens underneath the surface. Yeah. Beautiful. Yeah.

So good. So in thinking about this year, because I know it's been a big year for you in terms of just thinking about your own growth, this year has been massive and so many big things have happened. And since you're on the Doing Business like a Woman podcast, what does that mean to you today? Like doing business like a woman. How has that changed for you this year over your career? How have you. How have you grown this year?

If I can zoom out for a moment in time, I think about my time in corporate and how I was so unaware. And that was before I had coaches of my own and mentors of my own. I wish I knew what I knew back then, but such as life. And there are no regrets, just learning lessons. But when I think about my time in corporate, how I. Whether it was from My own family or society or my own mis notions of how I needed or should show up. I very much felt this immense pressure to conform and to fit some kind of mold. Like I have to show up smart, I have to show up the best. I have to show up knowing everything. I have to show up perfect, perfect, perfect, perfect. And what that lended itself to was a lot of disconnection. It lended itself to a lot of stress, of course, and burnout and internal pressure and strife. It led to a lack of being genuine because I didn't even know who I was at the time. I wasn't even connected to myself, let alone could connect to other people in a really heart centered way. And I realized that's what I thought business was like. That's what I had to do. I had to show up. It was ego driven and now that I think about it was very ego driven very much. And the ego is not bad, right? It keeps us safe. There's this beautiful integration between head and heart, I believe. But it was very much the ego was in the, in the driving that steering wheel much of the time. And what I've learned over the years is that I am my most successful. And that's all in the sense that I'm my healthiest, I am my most flourishing, and I am my wealthiest. When I am connecting to almost like those softer skills, right? Harvard Business Review would call them the soft skills. When I'm connecting more to my heart, when I'm present to the people or the person I'm speaking to or with in front of me, when I'm present at the networking events, when I'm present with my client, when I'm not thinking about what am I going to say next, but really listening and being curious. When I'm leading with those qualities and more, I can't tell you how significant the outcomes are compared to when I'm leading with just my head or just my ego. It's just, it's a whole new way of being. It's a whole new paradigm and it's a lot more fun and it's a lot softer in a sense of the way too. And I don't say that in a. And I know some people might hear that word softer and think weak, but I think it's strategic. I think our presence and softening to our own selves is what helps us to be more relatable and helps us to stand out and all of the noise and distractions that we have in the world today. People are starving for connection. People are Hungry for real, authentic connection. They don't care if you're perfect. They just care that you're present and that you're here with them right now, not thinking about your to do. And that's easier said than done. Of course, I do that too. But coming back to that, it's a practice. People can feel that. And to me, people do business with people they know and trust. And that trust is the biggest piece because people can know and like you, but if they don't trust trust you, they're not going to part with their dollars and invest in you. Yeah. So it's the trust. Do you create safety with your employees? Do you create safety with your clients? You create safety with people who may never be your clients. Do you create safety within them? Are you consistent? Do you show up in a regulated way instantly so that people are like, wow, I can trust Melissa. Wow, she is genuine. I want to be her client. That is what I have found to be the biggest transformation in doing business like a woman.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I love that. It's so good because, and I think this is something that, and I know you can relate that we as women and as entrepreneurs, we struggle with. Right. Because there's so much, so much noise out there of you have to do it this way or do it that way or use this five step process or that three steps to your first million or whatever. And so we end up getting very wrapped up in consuming all of these things. But what that does. And it's great to learn. I love to learn. I'm a huge student and I love that. But at the same time, it, like you said, it creates that disconnection. We get disconnected from who we are and if we're not connected to ourselves, then we can't connect to other people. And that comes from that regulated state you're talking about. And, and you know, that's. I know we talked about that a lot, but also around marketing and showing up in the world that perfection. I just wrote a post about this today, so it's like really fresh in my mind that perfection doesn't create connection. Being real does. But you can't be real if you don't know what real is for you.

Yes, yes. Because then it's so easy, right? We're getting bombarded by messages left and right on social media alone of this is the way. This is the strategy, this is the tool. And again, and I totally appreciate what you said because I'm the same way too. I am a student for life and love learning new things and love understanding new concepts and how that can pertain to my business. But when it comes down to it, business is about relationship. It really is. It's about the human to human relationship. Someone will not refer you if they don't feel a connection to you. They just won't. And we've all experienced that either on the receiving end or the giving end. I've done it many times myself where I've made mistakes in the past and came across salesy and then I've done and I've been on the receiving end of it too and it makes me want to run away. This person doesn't care who I am as a person. They just the dollar signs with me and then you've experienced it with other people where and it can this whether it's business or business owners or your own team. Right. You could do this too with your own team. If you're just trying to push your agenda on your team all the time and you're not trying to connect with your team, do you really think that they're going to go above and beyond? Do they, do you think that they're invested in your vision and mission and values as a business? Probably not. They're probably just coming for a paycheck and looking for somewhere else to go in the meantime. It just, I can't tell you how much it applies. Like I'll just share this little story, anecdotal story in nursing and this is something that it was such an aha moment for me when I realized so I was a charge nurse is my first time as a charge nurse. I felt like I didn't know what I was doing. But obviously my leaders thought they saw something in me that at the time I maybe didn't see. And I just remember having some of my nurses come to me and complain and say, oh, the patient. It's just they're so annoying. They're so annoying. They just, they're just so needy and annoying. And I was like that's interesting. Tell me more. And they'd give me examples and it doesn't matter what the specifics were, but I remember, I can't tell you, Melissa, nine times out of 10, of course there will be that one person that you'll never make happy, of course. And that's, that's not for you to try and weigh them. But nine times out of 10, I would go into a patient's room and they just wanted to feel heard and seen, wanted to know that they were being heard and seen. And you have to understand that they're in the hospital. That's a highly stressful situation to be that we can apply this zone, translate it to people are there. People are battling battles we don't even know. Right. Invisible battles that we don't even know as bosses, as business owners, as leaders. But anyway, they just wanted to feel seen and heard. And I remember thinking, I sat down, I pulled up a chair, and I said, talk me. What's going on? What can I do to help you? And nine times out of 10, it was like, actually, I'm good. I don't need to talk to the house supervisor. I don't need to talk to the doctor. And if they did, of course I would allow that because that's my job, too. But nine times out of 10, they felt, okay, I'm good, I can exhale. And I realized I started telling my nurses this. Give them 10 minutes of your time up front will save you 12 hours later, 12 hours of your shift later down the road.

Wow.

And invest 10 minutes of your time, of your undivided attention, just listening to them and asking them, truly being genuine about it and asking, what can I do to serve and support you right now? I will swear to you the rest of your 12 and a half hour shift will go pretty darn smoothly. And it was true. It was proven time and time again, those nurses who did it versus those who didn't, it was a big difference in their outcomes in their shift, in how they left their work day.

Yeah. Yeah. So as you're talking, I'm thinking, how do you make time and space to slow down and connect back with yourself first?

Are you asking me personally, or more.

Of both, what works for you? Because I think I'm thinking about. I'm always thinking about the woman I used to be. Right when I am having these conversations and questions come up.

So.

Before having this awareness and I'm just on this hamster wheel just trying to learn all the things and trying to do everything perfectly, and it's not working great, whatever. How do I step out of that? And we make space for connecting back to who I am so that then I can connect with others as a leader, as an entrepreneur. Like, how do you counsel your clients?

I love that there's so many different things that come to mind, like, different stuff. And I love that you said, because I think about that, too. I'm like, the person I was 10 years ago, 20 years ago, years ago, is definitely different than the person I am now. And I sometimes wonder, what was that first step? Or what were those first initial beginner steps. I think what's coming to me. So I'm just going to trust it. I'm going to trust my intuition here. I think not. I think I know that the power of giving ourselves some grace is. Can do wonders in our life. Yes, we are all highly skilled. Yes, we all are highly intelligent. I know that the listeners listening in right now are highly skilled, highly intelligent and are badasses. I just know this. I hope it's okay that I say that. I just. Sometimes we need to give ourselves the grace to understand that not everything is necessarily going to be excellent the first few times. You can strive for excellence and I think it's great to strive for excellence. But don't minimize all the little steps it takes to get to that. It's a constant and consistent coming back home to ourselves. It's a constant and consistent course correcting ourselves. Course correcting. Whatever it is, it's a constant and consistent, oh, I did the wrong thing or I said the wrong thing or I wasn't very present or I picked up my phone while my employee was talking to me and it's coming back and not beating yourself up over it, but recognizing that you are a human too and you have your own things that you're dealing with too. But then what are you going to do to repair the situation? What can you do to repair a situation either for yourself or for maybe the people that were affected? So I think, I think that's the initial step that I take with myself is connecting with myself. It's just saying, okay, Jen, you've made it this far. Now you're. Now you're. Now you are. You've made it to this field goal. Now you're going to push the field goal out further. And in some ways, yes, I'm beginning again. In some ways, yes, I am learning again. And in some ways I'm not. I have a lot of expertise and foundational skills and things that I've built upon over the years. But don't be afraid to take the ego out and say, I am learning and I am growing and I am a beginner too. Don't be afraid to be in that beginner's mindset a little bit. You'll be surprised that if you do that, and I am saying this for my own benefit now, taking my own advice quickly, you can get to that field goal if you are able to take the ego out a little bit and be a little more loving to yourself of and accepting of where you are in the process.

Yeah, I love that.

What do you think about that?

It's really important. And I love how you said that we have to keep coming back. Like, it's not. You're going to do one, some magic practice at one time, and then voila. You never feel disconnected. You never spend too much time up in your head. Or like you said earlier, you're never overthinking everything. Right. So we're always dealing with our humanness. Even when we know better, we still are humans with a human mind. And so I love that giving yourself grace and really that's the first step and coming back to. It's okay. I'm doing the best I can with the thoughts that I have and believing and making it safe, because that really is what creates safety. Right.

For.

With yourself.

So then you can create safety with others. Absolutely, yeah. Absolutely. Yeah. I. Something else was coming to me and it just slipped my mind. But if it comes back, I'll trust that it will to add on to that.

So does that look like a daily practice for you or is this kind of. As needed in the moment.

I remember what I was going to say, and then I'll answer your question. It's a lot like going to the gym. I love to use analogies and metaphors because it's a way that our subconscious can understand things, like bigger concepts that would be really abstract for us to try and puzzle piece together.

Love it.

To me, what you were saying is about the constant going back to it. If you have a certain health goal, you're not. Maybe my goal is to buff up my arms. Well, I want those arms to stay buff. So now they're buff. Do I just stop going to the gym? No, you keep going. You keep going before they're buff, and you keep going. Once you've reached that goal, you keep going to maintain and stay consistent. You don't stop going to the gym just because you have done it once or have achieved it once. So there's a lot. I think there's a lot of wisdom in that analogy, and I'll let that one go now and move on to your next question. I do. I realize that this is a luxury and I'm. Full transparency. I'm coming to. How do I reckon with this? So I'll speak to where I am right now, but that I recognize not everyone has this luxury. I have designed my life intentionally to have time and white space. I've done that intentionally back in 2014, when I realized that having time was really important for me for these deeper thoughts, deeper work. So I Intentionally designed my life to be one where I could have time. So I will say that. So maybe that's it. And maybe that is my advice now that I say it is time. Even a little bit of white space. You've taught me this too, Melissa. And as I'm going and getting bigger and growing and scaling, I cannot tell you how important that white time is. That white space is now. It's necessary. It's necessary because as a visionary CEO, I need to have my feet on the ground, but a very clear path of where I'm headed and a very clear, clear view of the horizon. So my white face is my time to get back and be centered and be that visionary CEO who is executing and implementing with her own team. It's a hundred percent. Even if it's just 15 minutes. If it's just 15 minutes, set the damn timer. Set a goal two to three days a week and just get in the practice of it. Will you have deep thoughts in 15 minutes? I don't know. I'm not gonna promise you. Maybe you will and maybe you won't. But get in the practice of it so that you can start to have deeper thoughts. Get in the practice of it. They can start having deeper thoughts if you want. Again, gym analogy. Maybe you put the shoes by the front door first and you put them on, and maybe the next day you go to the gym and you stand in the parking lot, but you don't go in. And then the next day you walk into the gym and maybe you do five minutes of work and then you go back. Keep that structure alive and watch how things transform and evolve for you. So white spaces. Yeah, I stand by that. Yeah, I love that.

And how did you come to really treasure or really prioritize, I guess is the word? How did you come to prioritize that? Because you can probably relate. Most of us are very production oriented and we don't feel like we're worth anything unless we're in production mode. So tell me a little bit about your thinking around having white space versus productivity. Like, what are your thoughts that really get you there to prioritize it?

Yeah. Yeah. There's a real big difference between busy work and work that moves the needle forward. There was a version of me, and I'm still learning this, so I would not say that I have mastered this, but there was a version of me that said if I work eight hours a day, then I can count it as a really great day and hang my hat up and be proud and be. And of course I would be right and be proud of myself. But then I realized, is it really, am I moving the needle forward? Is this work that's important in getting me to my goals or is this just busy work? So for me, I focus on high impact action. I focus on the things that I know are going to generate revenue in my business. That often means, here's the caveat or the disclaimer. That often means it's the scariest, the more scarier thing to do. So that means that I might be the chapter president for a local networking organization. That might mean that I say yes to an event where there's all CEOs sitting at the table. And that might mean that I practice a little bit of my elevator pitch beforehand so that I can feel confidence in front of these CEOs before I connect with them and then have coffee with them later. Because I absolutely would do that too. As opposed to, ooh, let me spend five hours thinking and overthinking my logo right now. Ooh, let me spend five hours overthinking the copy of my website. Not saying that's not important. It is important to a certain degree. But my question is always, is this a high impact or busy work? And that's what decides. Because I am a solopreneur, yes, I do have a small team of some freelance freelancers. They're not doing everything. I am right now the forward facing entity, person of my business. At some point in time, I'd love to have multiple coaches and that will happen. But right now my thing is what's going to move the needle forward? Is it going to that networking event or is it me analyzing pages and pages of a class or a book? And maybe it is sometimes, maybe the time calls for me to immerse myself. I'm actually in a little bit of that season myself where I'm learning new skills myself. So I'm immersing myself in some courses and classes, but I'm not giving up or losing sight of still being in rooms of still going to organizations where the decision makers, the team leaders are that I can start to build visibility, connection and trust because over time, that's what leads to business. So I would just always ask if you're contending with, oh my gosh, this long list of things to do, which by the way, everyone, I get it, everyone has that long list. What are the things that are going to generate, what are the high impact actions that are going to move the needle forward and generate money in your business faster and greater and then focus on those First. Just focus on those first.

Yeah, I love that. So good. So looking back across this year, since we are near the end of the year, about thinking about 2025, what do you see as your greatest growth this year? Your greatest growth that we worked on together? Just what you're really celebrating. I really want to celebrate you. You have come so far and it's been such an honor to get to be part of your journey and it's so great to get to chat with you and catch up today. And I just love this. So, yeah, what can we celebrate?

Thank you for that, by the way. Fully received that. I think the first thing to celebrate is something that you have helped me is to just deepen my own connection to myself. There's we. I feel like learning and growing is like layers of an onion. We peel back different layers and it's never one and done. It's an ongoing thing. We might find ourselves bumping up something that you thought you were healed in like years ago, but now it's coming again to the surface to be looked at again. And I think it's like that ascending staircase, spiral staircase, where you hit the same place but you're at a higher level. And that's where I feel like I am. This last year was a big. This last year and a half, to be quite honest with you, was a big internal growth year for me and you. One of the things that you really taught me that I lean into, that gives me my superpower, like truly that gives me the courage to show up and do that high impact action is always cultivating a sense of deep self trust and belief in my skills and the impact I'm here to make in the world. It is knowing and just even just having a little like highlight reel of all the clients I've helped in one way or the other, just that's what helps give me the courage to show up in my fullest expression. That's what helps me to show up is the connection to my service and my impact and my mission. And you've really helped me because that has really pushed the needle forward in so many ways. And I think for this year and that continues and that deepens. I think for this year the big word for me was feeling alive. And I didn't know what that meant at first, but I just, I felt like things were a little dull around this time last year. Like things were a little muted in my life and I wanted to feel this sense of aliveness that I was missing and craving. And so I started running, which is Crazy, because I am not a runner by any means, but I was running more for the sake of feeling my heart beating. Like to feel my heart pulsing through my body. To feel that connection again with my body isn't interesting. That connection back to our bodies again. And I realized that aliveness to me is to be fully engaged with life and both the ups and the downs and not shut down, to not mute myself, to not numb out. And when I do find myself doing that, to come back. So to come back. Because, man, life is so freaking beautiful if we let ourselves see it. And it is also painstakingly heartbreaking too. It's like that duality. It's like it is all of that together.

Yeah.

And so I just want to be in that and I want to play in it and I want to be engaged in it. And I'm committing and I've committed to that. And that's a continuation of this next year too, into 2026. That's where I'm at and that's the growth I'm celebrating. I have done some pretty darn big things this year. Pretty darn big things. Like some still in development, but it's like things that I never would have imagined could be possible for me because at the time I didn't have that level of self belief that I do now.

I love it. That's a huge celebration.

Thank you. I think it is.

You know, there's nowhere to go but up. When you have that self trust and that self acceptance.

It is because it's what? Gosh, I was just giving a talk this past summer. It's not necessarily confidence. It's the courage. It's the ability to hold the freaked out feelings that I have inside of me and still show up and still say, I'm worth being here, I belong here. Because I know what I'm here to do and who I'm here to serve and the mission I'm here to make. And that's really freaking important because a lot of people need that right now and just stand by that with such conviction and still feel scared. I think there's a lot of power in that.

A lot of power.

Yeah.

Because most people don't get what they want in life or don't go after what they want in life because they're afraid to feel the feelings that are associated with it.

Yep. I just had that happen recently. Yep. I was like, oh, that's what's been under the surface that I was too afraid to feel now. What are we avoiding now? Yeah, you're right. 100. I agree with you on that.

Which is the power of coaching, right?

100%, the power of coaching. And I think just generalized men versus women. I think it's a mate we have. Like the world needs more well resourced, healthy men and women in this world, really, truly one of our superpowers as women is the ability to be connected to our emotions. It's not to necessarily say, let's be driven and ruled by our emotions every single day, but let yourself feel the feeling. Don't get stuck there, right? Keep moving forward. But let yourself feel the feeling so you can process it, clear it out and keep moving forward.

I love that. I love that. So what would you say to a woman listening right now that is considering coaching, Hiring a coach, hiring me. Potentially finding a coach that works is the best fit for them. What has coaching meant to you in your journey that you think she needs to know?

I find in the last six years of coaching, primarily women, I find that more often than not they're coming to me because they are saying, enough is enough. I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired. And they've tried everything else and they've often more often than not tried it on their own and it didn't work. And I'm not saying that it can't happen. You can't do amazing things on your own. But I came to a realization about a year ago, like, why would I want to do this all alone? Why carry this immense emotional burden of stress that I have by myself? Aren't I worthy to ask for the help and to receive the support? Aren't I worthy to have the accountability? Because what I'm here to do is really big and here to serve a lot of people and help a lot of people. So why wouldn't I invest in myself? Why wouldn't I take a chance on myself and bet on me? And the return on investment, both physically and both tangibly and intangibly has been quantum leap compared to if I were to just do things on my own. Quantum leap. If you are serious about your dream, if you are serious about whatever it is that's calling to you, that is your soul really trying to get you to say yes and nudge you along and to be alive. So say yes. Say yes. I know it's scary, and it's often scary because it's maybe the first time you've ever done something. But anything new is always going to be unfamiliar and scary. But be willing to try something differently because that's the only way that we are going to achieve our goals because if you did do what you were doing, you would be there by now. You would be there by now. And I think you've told me that before. You would be there by now. Be willing to be open and ask for help and support and know that you are worthy to receive that support. It's a whole lot more fun and easier. Simpler than trying to be everything to yourself and be all things to yourself, let alone to other people too.

Yeah. Especially as moms and partners and. Yeah. All the other things. Yeah.

Yeah.

So good. I love it. It's been so good to catch up with you and have you here. I really have loved this conversation. It really is so special to me. So what is the best way for people to connect with you? I do have to put a little plug in for your social media. I know you hang out mainly on Instagram and Facebook. You're probably on. Are you on LinkedIn too?

I am on LinkedIn now too. Yep. Yep.

But Jen produces amazing content and so I highly recommend you connect with her on the socials. But tell us where are the best places to connect with you?

Yeah, you can find me, like you said, on Instagram, LinkedIn and Facebook. It's Jenn J E N N A D A M S O N Or you can also visit me on my which is also jenadamson.com and feel free to send a message if there's anything that resonated with you. Melissa, I know you have probably feel the same way too. Message both of us. Tell us what, what felt really good or what really landed with you because we just love to have these conversations and it's also nice to know it is landing, it is resonating with people. So we'd love to hear your insight and your feedback to anyone who's listening. Just to say, hey, I listened to your podcast. I'll just.

I love that. Great idea. Yes. We will definitely link all of that in the show notes. So if you're driving right now, don't feel like you have to remember or write it down. But thank you so much for being here and for your time and your generosity. I really appreciate you and feel so honored to know you. So thank you.

Yeah, thank you, Melissa. The feeling is completely mutual. Thank you so much. It's an honor to to be your guest today. Thank you. Yay.

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