156: 3 Effortless Tricks To Be a More Confident Speaker with Kerri Garbis

Have you ever noticed when you watch.

Speakers on stage, the best speakers, the ones who make an impact, do you notice how they have this sense of confidence? And have you ever wondered, how did they get that?

Welcome to a podcast where we help.

Communicators create the right response at the right time and deliver it in the right place. And in this case, deliver it with a punch. Do you struggle with speaking in front of others? Do you feel your voice shake and tremble and you find yourself unable to form a coherent sentence?

You add a lot of filler words.

When it's your time to talk, you're not alone. You have heard me talk about it on the podcast before with previous guests. Speaking confidently is something that many people find difficult. So this week on the podcast, my third public speaking coach is providing three easy tricks for confident public speaking. Kerry Garbus is the CEO and founder of Ovation, a communication skills training firm specializing in professional presence and speaker development. Carrie shares three effortless tricks to be a more confident speaker. Take a listen Carrie, I am excited.

To speak with you about a topic I know my listeners want to hear about because I always get feedback on help with speaking. So I'm looking forward to speaking with you and welcome to the podcast.

Thank you for having me, Molly.

Carrie, I did a little research about you and as I mentioned, I've had two other speaking coaches, speaking professionals, on the podcast before. The first one, Gina Raison, she was a former opera singer and she was also a coach, a TED Talk coach. I had another one, Allison Shapira, she was a former opera singer as well. And you, I understand, have a background in the theater.

I do, yes. So my background, I heard both of those episodes too and I heard, I think it was Alison Tsang actually on the Yes, I was really impressed. I was like, oh yeah, go girl. So I, I like to say I'm an actor by birth. That sounds weird. I started professionally when I was 12 years old and that's what I've done. I my undergrad, I have a BFA in musical theater and I still continue to this day to be a professional actor. And I started this company for professional presence speaker development and only hire professional actors to be the facilitators and the coaches.

Okay, then what is it? What's the secret sauce of actors? Why do they make good speakers or great speakers?

They make good speakers and they make really good coaches because we the study of acting starts with building our self awareness, which I think truly is the cornerstone of being a great presenter, being present in all our communication and because we've honed that from the very beginning of our studies, it's a great person to be taught by, as well as see these techniques modeled before your very eyes. That. And we can really help bring out the best, shiniest version of each speaker that we work with. I also really, when I started the company, wanted to employ my friends in between their acting gigs. And so one of my drivers is to empower actors to thrive.

Oh, well, I'm all about that in the actor community. And of course, my. For Your page on TikTok is all about actors. So let me do a quick little sidestep here. What is your favorite role that you have played? Are you musical theater, by the way?

I am. I am, yes. BFA musical theater. I've done some. I've done many. What they call straight plays. Right. No, non. Musicals. And many musicals as well. My favorite.

Okay.

My favorite musical of all time. And I did the Boston production of the 25th annual Putnam County Spelling Bee. And because it's a spelling bee, right? These kids come to this town and they're in the spelling bee. And I played the hostess of the spelling bee. And what was great about that was it's a Bill Finn musical who's a wonderful composer. So I got to sing great songs. It's really witty and touching and funny. And there's an improv element to the show because they bring in real people on stage every single show. So it's never quite exactly the same. It keeps someone like me on their toes, which I love. I love off the cuff stuff. I love unknowns and handling weird things that go down. So it was. I think that was my favorite. I think that's one of my favorites.

Well, all the qualities that would certainly help you become a good, powerful speaker. I thought for sure you're gonna say Avenue Q, and then I could belt out an Avenue Q song. But. But still, nonethele. Nonetheless, it's wonderful to have you here. And again, I hear so often feedback from my listeners. They tell me they get so much out of these episodes where I speak to performance coaches, because that's what speaking is, after all. It is a performance. You're going to speak with me today about how to appear more confident on stage. How are we tapping into that onstage presence to make a more vibrant and exciting speech. So what can you tell us, Carrie?

So it is really all about distraction or getting rid of the distractions. So whether that's. You're nervous as a speaker, you're uncomfortable, you start to look uncomfortable, you start to sound uncomfortable. We start to do like weird things sometimes with our hands and our face and our hair and that can get really distracting for our audience and that's not good. And then if we're nervous and become distracted, then we're off message, maybe we're even off brand. And we want to tap into this thing of what's confident for me, because what's confident for me is going to look different on you versus look different on every single one of your listeners. So really finding one, what does confidence look like and feel like for you? So because we don't want a presentation skills robot, we want a confident, shiny version of you.

Give me an example. What do you use to feel confident when you speak?

Oh, so I have a good pre game ritual kind of thing. It's one of the things I do. So I always warm up. I do a little bit of a speaker's warmup. I definitely stretch. So and walk if I have time right before whatever that is. And I have a couple breathing exercises and a very specific pre game, like right before I go on. It includes some visualization, getting in a good mindset, and that's what I do. That doesn't work for everybody. So we encourage and we help people find a pre game ritual that works for them.

Oh, interesting. As you were saying it, I don't have a pregame ritual other than turning off my phone and my iWatch. So I think I need to do. The one thing that I did learn is the breathing though, is I always make a point of breathing before I go on. All right, I like that. Eliminate the distractions and focus on what makes you confident. What's another step that someone can do to be confident in their speaking?

You gotta practice. You have to. You have to. It is a fantasy of mine that any speaker who says, who says practice doesn't work, I would like to speak with them. So if that is you, I challenge you to contact me so we can have a conversation. A very nice, respectful conversation. Practicing and practicing in a productive way with accountability is key. And because practicing just in your head like, okay, I'm going to do this, I'm going to do this and I do this. That's never works well. It doesn't always. It never sounds the same. And practicing it, just repeating it out loud over and over again without any goals or specific markers to hit can really compound some of those distractions that your audience is going to see and hear. So practicing out loud with accountability is key.

What does practicing with accountability mean specifically? What should they be Doing in this.

Practice session, it can mean different things. We introduce a rehearsal technique that we call the talk through walkthrough dress rehearsal. So three times through out loud. Each iteration has a very specific goal. So that the first one we're thinking about, okay, does the structure work? Do I have a good beginning, middle, and end? Is the story arc taking me somewhere? Have I put some stories in there? And then the second iteration, the walkthrough, is on your feet. And when I say on your feet, that can mean either, as a really good friend of mine says, in body or in spirit. So, meaning if we're able to stand, get on your feet. Because your brain does some really cool things. If you're able to stand and your content will get into your muscle memory faster. If you are unable to stand, get there in spirit. Meaning, can I sit up? Am I breathing? Is my diaphragm working as well at 2 capacity as it should? And get on your feet and practice out loud. Even if you will never, ever, ever in your whole life say this. Content standing. Even if you're going to do a panel, sitting on a stage or a stool or you're virtual, whatever. Even though I'm standing now, for those who can't see me, I'm typically always standing. So you're going to do the walkthrough and walk around if you can. And then thirdly, the dress rehearsal is that time through, no stops. I don't care. The dog walks through. On your virtual rehearsal, you Forget something, your PowerPoint goes down. Whatever happens, you're going to, yes, end it, deal with it, take it, and then continue on. So that's what we teach. Talk through walkthrough dress rehearsal.

Oh, I like that. And, Carrie, as you were explaining it then, you've just explained my pregame ritual, which I do do whenever I'm traveling and I'm in a hotel room. No matter how many times I've given this talk, I will do the talk standing up in my hotel room with the pacing. If I'm using a deck or not, I do that run through. And I recognize now that you're saying it. It does calm me down, and it settles the content in my brain. When you're walking and talking, you think and you ingest it in a different way. So that's an excellent tip. Okay, good. All right, number three, what is the third tip for being a confident speaker?

Well, we want to make it authentic to you. We want you to be you when speaking. What does that mean? That means telling good stories that you can tie back to the content, making it. Making you as human as possible, because that's what audiences connect to the real you. You do not need to put on a character. You do not need to have a memorized script. And in fact, we recommend for non actors, if you're not in a play, don't memorize something. You're the subject matter expert. You're there speaking for whatever reason it is, even if it is just to stand and share a compelling story at a PTA meeting, whatever it is you are there to do. And so making it the most you and authentic that you can is what we want, is what audiences want. And so making it authentic in the most palatable way so an audience can understand you. And a lot of times that has to do with pause taking pauses. Pauses do magical things.

Pauses do do magical things. And it does magical things for not only the room, but for yourself too. It kind of calms you, resets, and it gives you time to take information in. Yes, I'm going to. I'm going to throw a curve for you on this one. Speaking of this last tip of yours, do you notice, I don't know if you're like me, but I see a lot of other people speak, you know, when I'm in the wings waiting or if I happen to be at a conference and I can't help myself. I'm not overly critical, but I always take a performance in to see what I like and see what I don't like. I mean, I'm distilling it for things to use or not use. What do you notice as a tick that is your signal to a nervous speaker or someone who is not confident.

Oh, that's. That is a good question a lot. Because a lot of things are going through my mind because you started to ask the question. I went to one place and then you took me to another here. Well, one nervous. I don't know if this is nervous. And I. But I would say a common tick that I see that the second I hear it, I'm like, I sort of shut down is when the speaker comes out and they'll say good morning or, you know, whatever. Greetings. Good morning. I'm Carrie Garbus, and I am super excited to be here. And then I'm like, they don't care. Now, that is may. They might really be super excited to be here and they might really care. To me, that says they didn't take like two seconds and think about something more interesting to say at the top of their session. Take it from Someone who. Ovation's been coaching conference speakers now for 10 years, and that's thousands of speakers a year. So we've been to a lot of conferences. I personally have sat through a gazillion sessions. That's not official number, but it feels like it. And the amount that we see of Ovation, of the non Ovation trained speakers is they typically will start with, good morning, I'm super excited to be here. And. And you're already as the speaker battling so much distraction, as I said in the first thing, right? It's all about distraction. You're already. You need to do something at the top that's going to get people to look up from their phone. That's that. That is.

What do you do? What do you do to get people to look up from their phone?

What do I do? Personally? Anything. Everything. Everything I have done. You.

We.

We offer something at Ovation called an attention grabber. Right? It's that first second, grab their attention. So that could be jumping right into a story. Just starting with, okay, there I was sitting on the Runway and the dinosaur came, whatever. Or doing a change in the visual asking, you know, and asking a question like, okay, does anybody know who this is? Or it could be a shocking statistic, or maybe not a shocking statistic, or maybe it's a quote. Or maybe you play a gong, whatever it is. A gong, that would be the best.

But then you have to travel with a gong.

But. Well, no, no, I'm not recommending traveling with a gong. I did. I was somewhere. I think I was in Montana. And Molly knows I'm on the road right now, so I'm in road mode. I'm in Nebraska at this moment. I was in my. This is years ago. I was in Montana somewhere. It was like a ranch and I was speaking and I. At the like the barn type place where the event was, I found one of those, like feed triangles, you know, like the big. So that's what I did at the beginning. And I was like, okay, here we go. Executive presence. I don't know.

So I'd say like, you grab the triangle. That's interesting. I also spoke at a ranch in Montana. I wonder if it was the same one. I didn't see the lady with the triangle saying, come and get it, boys. Come and eat. Carrie, that's such a great tip. And as you were mentioning, when someone gets up in front of the room to say, I'm so excited to be here, whenever I see that false start, I think it's like that lost moment that they're going to be off their game. Because once you say that, there's just that pause and you have to kind of gather momentum again. And I'm. I'm with you on that one. That is a tick that tells me right away this is someone that doesn't have their talk down solid. But the other thing that you pointed out, too, you had mentioned the phones, and this is a struggle for speakers. You know, how to manage the phone. And as you explained it, I had a memory the last time I spoke. I was in Florida last month. Maybe I can't, you know, speakers we can't remember. I think it was last month. And I, I was speaking. And as it started at 1 o', clock, I was waiting and I looked around the room and. Because people are on their phones, but what I chose to do was say nothing. I just stood there in silence and just watch the people and put their heads up. Yeah, I go, oh, we're starting. I don't know why I felt that, but. And then started with that bang comment, like, I'm here. Like, not, you know, not like the dinner bell, but, man, if I had a gong, wouldn't that be a great prop to bang on your speech?

I would say use your. Use your environment. I mean, it is your party. You are in charge in that moment, and they're gonna go with whatever you throw down. So. So do it.

Great metaphor. It's a party. It is, right? You're the host of your party. Okay, Carrie, at the end of every podcast, I like to share that one indestructible tip. It's that tip that leaves this indelible mark. It's that one thing that someone's going to take away from this conversation that will help them when they get on stage or in front of a room for their next talk. What would be that one indestructible tip that helps someone become an incredibly powerful and confident speaker?

No matter how much time you have, long amount of time, short amount of time, if somebody says, get up and speak in five minutes, say it out loud. And even if you only have time for the very, very beginning, that first moment, that attention grabber, say it out loud. And even better, say it, stand it, go into the bathroom, be by yourself for a minute and say it out loud, you will immediately start to feel and appear more confident and it will get into your muscle memory. So spe it out loud, Carrie, that's.

Such a good tip. And I just always assume that everyone does it, but maybe they don't. Do people run through their talks in their head.

Yes, they do. I'm here to change the world on that. But you are.

Okay, that's an excellent. I have all the interviews I've done on this topic and books I've read. I've never heard that one. And that's a good one. Say it out loud so it sticks. Carrie, where can people find out more information about you and your business?

Well, head over to getovation.com that will tell you everything we've got going on in the company and all our wonderful things to help you become a better speaker. And everybody's welcome to follow me on LinkedIn or Facebook. Every Tuesday at 2 Eastern I do a tip Tuesday. I'm in fact going to go live with that in just about a half an hour today from my hotel room and all things professional presence and speaker development. So I would love some new followers. Thank you so much.

Well, Carrie, it was a joy to speak with you today about this topic. It's one of my favorite topics, but the reason why is because I think a lot of people struggle with it. I mean, everyone's public speaking makes so many people nervous. And the tips that you had today were super easy to take in and I know they'll help people. Thank you so much for taking the time to speak with me.

You are welcome. Thank you for having me.

My thanks to Carrie Garbus for sharing her speaking tips that she uses with her Ovation clients.

Another way of sharing that can help.

Others is if you share this podcast with someone who wants to build their confidence on stage or even in their communications. Thanks so much for listening. I'll see you here again next week, same time, same place. Bye for now.