94: How to Apologize During a PR Crisis: Why Ellen DeGeneres Kept Quiet (And Why You Shouldn't)

Oh, Ellen, it was so, so easy. And now look at all the negative publicity. Since the news broke that the Ellen DeGeneres show is under formal investigation, there's been a lot of speculation lately that Ellen may be replaced as the host. The press, vicious. The fans vilified her. Ellen's cancellation is in a news story only for E. News. Reputational death spirals aren't for the celebrities alone. Anyone can fall into a reputational death spiral if they don't play their cards right when they apologize. How to apologize during a PR crisis and why Ellen kept quiet and why you shouldn'. If a Las Vegas casino ever created a sports book for the reputations of people, it's like a room filled with TV screens and news stories moving across the screens for me to wager on reputational downfalls, I would break the casino. I love prognosticating anyone's reputation when they're in a tailspin. As you can tell if you listen to the podcast, and I'll admit, all of these. Well, many of them, these PR crises, they're easy to call. You know, something bad's coming around the corner. But some not so much. You know, when the brands, the names are huge, if they're cemented in kindness, no one wants to bring down the nice ones, right? Well, it happens. And it certainly happened in the case of Ellen DeGeneres. Now, I tipped this one months ago when I saw this clip appear online. Take a listen.

It's good to see you. Happy belated birthday. When was your birthday?

It was October 4th.

October 4th. You turned 30.

I did.

And how was the party? I wasn't invited, actually.

No. That's not the truth, Ellen. You were invited last year. No, last time I was on the show last year, you gave me a bunch of about not inviting you, but I didn't even know you wanted to be invited.

Well, who doesn't want to be? Who didn't want to be invited to a party?

Well, I didn't even know you liked me.

Of course I like you. You knew I liked you. You've been on the show many times. And don't I show like.

But I did invite you, and you.

Didn'T come, so this time you invited me?

Yeah.

Are you sure?

Yeah.

How do you know? I don't think so.

Ask everybody. Ask Jonathan, your producer, who said you were.

I was invited. Why didn't I go?

I don't know.

Ew. Awkward, right? But also an edge to Ellen. Maybe you've seen this clip before. You've. You've heard it online. And you weren't thinking about Ellen's reaction too much. And I'll admit, the first time I saw this Dakota clip, I was thinking about the time when she was on the red carpet with her mother, Melanie Griffith, and she was a little snarky on the red carpet. It was such a typical mother daughter moment. But Dakota brought something, a genuineness to her curiosity about why Ellen didn't go. And it exposed a real problem, a gap in Ellen's nice reputation. Now, there was always a murmur of the real Ellen, a meanness to her in private and even on her program. Ellen had a lot of powerful friends and made a lot of money for NBCUniversal. And in a time before viral social media, money talked. If you had a program on the air that brought in a lot of advertising dollars, no matter what your behavior was off camera, like a Johnny Carson, for instance, the ratings had more sway than the public's perception of you. Because back then, the public didn't have a means other than word of mouth to spread their opinions about someone. It was just over coffee. But nowadays, when a medium is literally in the hands of the public, in their cell phones, in their mobile phones or smartphones, or on their laptops, the hoi polloi, if you will, when they talk. And when a lot of people talk online, the press eventually picks it up. In March of 2020, comedian Kevin T. Porter tweeted a tweet that really started the avalanche for Ellen's PR downfall. His tweet read, right now, we all need a little kindness. You know, like Ellen DeGeneres always talks about. Snark, snark. She's also notoriously one of the meanest people alive. Respond to this with the most insane stories you've heard about Ellen being mean, and I'll match everyone with $2 to the LA Food Bank. Now, that was super smart that he did it because he didn't look like a snarky comedian that most people weren't familiar with that just wanted to bring down or cancel a big name. He was somewhat benevolent in it by offering to pay $2 donate to the LA Food Bank. Since the time of this recording, over 72,000 likes and over 18,000 retweets. The story broke through, it grabbed hold tight. And it would not let go of Ellen's reputation. So. So Ellen had her crisis on her hands. So there are three issues at play here. One, Ellen's behavior. Two, the actual climate and culture of the Ellen DeGeneres show compared to what had been projected to the public. And three, Ellen's response to the above one and two. On the podcast, I'm going to focus on the third issue. Ellen's response to the first and second issues. The star of this episode is not Ellen and she arrives only as a guest. This episode is about the apology. I'm sharing how to apologize during a PR crisis so you don't botch it like Ellen. It doesn't matter if you're a global celebrity or a known in your industry or town. Anyone can find themselves in a public peck of trouble that spills out online, causing reputational harm. So today, let's talk about why you need to apologize, the timing of the apology, and and what you should not do when making a public apology statement. It's been months now, and the Ellen DeGeneres show has fallen under heavy scrutiny for how it's treated employees in the past. So all these reports came flying in about the working conditions that many employees had been experiencing while filming the program, many of which included racism and intimidation. Now, BuzzFeed reported on the Ellen DeGeneres show in July, and it is in July. That is the first time the public heard any type of statement from the Ellen DeGeneres camp. So in a joint statement from the executive producers of the program to BuzzFeed News, they said that they took the stories of the employees very seriously. Those are in quotes. I'm going to read one section of the statement. Over the course of nearly two decades, 3,000 episodes, and implying over a thousand staff members, we have strived to create an open, safe and inclusive work environment. We are truly heartbroken and sorry to learn that even one person in our production family has had a negative experience. It's not who we are and not who we strive to be and not the mission Ellen has set for us. All right, that is the official statement. Did you hear the subtext? We have produced and taped so many shows, three thousand with a thousand staff members. They want you to know that they have so many programs that this is how it got by them. And they have so many employees that something's going to happen with the sheer number of work and the sheer number of employees. We have strived but fell short. And then they mention that even one person. Note that they said even one person. So what they're trying to do is diminish the complaints because the sheer number, the quantity of employees and programs is so immense. We only want you to focus on the sum, not the one part. And then they said, ellen has set this for us. Which means, hey, this isn't about Ellen. This is a statement from us, the executive producers. But the subtext. Ellen. Ellen is the one who told them they had to do it. Do you see the problem there? But by the time the statement came out in July, the problem had started in march. The damage was already done. The train had left the station long ago. The reports got worse, and Ellen finally chimed in, and her statement came out on the 30th of July. Now, I'm only going to read the first paragraph. You can google it. I have a link to her statement in the show notes. But let's play the game of interpret the subtext. All right, we'll play along in real time. It starts. Hey, everybody, it's Ellen. Subtext, your friendly host. Remember me, how fun and friendly I am. Next on day one of our show. Remember 3,000 of them. I told everyone in our first meeting, I did my job. It's someone else's problem that they didn't listen, that the Ellen degeneres show would be a place of happiness. No one would ever raise their voice. No one has accused her of yelling. They accused you, Ellen, of being mean. You can be mean, very mean. Without yelling. Ellen goes on that everyone would be treated with respect. Obviously, something changed. Well, Ellen, obviously something did change, and I am disappointed to learn what. Ellen just learned this. There are problems. Oh, my goodness. Why didn't anyone tell Ellen that this has not been the case? And for that, I am sorry. Anyone who knows me knows it's the opposite of what I believe and what I hope for in our show. All right, Ellen, perhaps it's what you believed and what you hoped for in your show, but your behavior, Ellen, has been called into question, which is what started the inquiry into the show in the first place. So many people out there condemn the cancel culture. Why do people want to bring people down? Everyone is so mean. There's one thing you need to learn about the cancel culture, it's this. The cancel culture, who survives, who dies. It's not chosen willy nilly. A bunch of random people. Don't just pick someone and decide, I'm going to hate you. That's what Ellen degeneres was accused of doing in our program to her employees. When people feel wronged, when fans feel misled, they want to let other people know. They want to let their people know, hey, something smells here and we want to do something about it. When the target of the cancel acts with hubris and ego, instead of acknowledging their role or accepting the blame, the result is the cancellation. People aren't canceled because of what They've done. They are canceled to the response to what they have done. Ellen's response wasn't quick enough and the show is still under heavy fire up until I'm recording this, not only for the reports of their porous and late apology, but because no one believed it. So don't let your company undergo a similar PR crisis. So why are apologies so critical? And what mistakes you should avoid when you have to release one? All right, now, why do you need to apologize? When it comes to apologizing for a PR crisis or when you're within a PR crisis, there is a three tiered PR crisis layout that you should follow. You've heard me mention it many times. Apologize. Acknowledge you have to accept responsibility when once you do that, you can put the charges in context. And then once you do that, you can move on. And then you can win it by promising the changes that you'll make. These three steps to this formula is crucial in creating that heartfelt apology that resonates with your clients and workers and those you've wronged. But why is a public apology so important? Well, here are the reasons why. 1. It helps you reclaim your reputation faster. Public apologies from a company or a brand are no different than when a human apologizes to another in day to day life. The business or the brand realizes that they make a mistake, so they accept responsibility for their actions and apologize to whoever they hurt. The apology goes a long way towards rebuilding how others perceive that company or that brand. So if your brand is typically personable and friendly like Ellen DeGeneres, then you have more to lose. In a PR crisis, apologizing can help you start to rebuild the rep that you work so hard to create. 2. It rebuilds dignity for those you've hurt. So contrary to popular belief, when a company has a PR crisis on their hands, the company's brand isn't the main concern. Everyone's eyes, including yours, turns towards the people affected by the company's mistake. So no matter what the situation is, those people are the ones who have had their dignity taken away from them. In the process, they've become vulnerable to public opinion, which is something they didn't sign up for. So your apology and acknowledgement of the mistake can help them get their dignity back. So whether it's a client, an employee, or third party, you want to ensure that they feel as little effect from this PR crisis as possible. Remember, your internal stakeholders, they are going through a PR crisis right along with you. So you want to make sure that you apologize to them because they're impacted as well. And dignity. When people lose it, that's when they rise up. When people sense that other people have lost their dignity, will they get mad on behalf of those people? 3. It starts to rebuild trust when you apologize, or the lack of it. The biggest loss from a PR crisis is the trust that you've lost with your followers, your fans, your customers, your members. Some of them will hold a grudge and never ever forgive you. Others will forgive you as long as you take the proper steps to right you're wrong. It's the latter that you need to focus on. Again. It's not the act. The act is bad. But remember, everyone makes mistakes. Everyone is navigating this new climate in this new culture. It's how you respond to it. The path to rebuilding trust with your employees and your clients starts by issuing that meaningful public apology. So make no mistake, it will take a while to win them back. It doesn't. Does. However, the sooner you apologize, the sooner the process of regaining their trust can begin. Some people, many people will never watch the Ellen DeGeneres show again. And if they do, they're going to watch it now through a lens. And it's not going to be a rose colored lens at all. They'll always have that skeleton in their closet. People will never be able to unsee the bad Ellen DeGeneres. If Ellen DeGeneres comes on the air again, and honestly, I don't think she will, I'm going to prognosticate right here. I think she's done every single time she goes on the air, every interview that she does, everyone is going to be looking for the cracks in the Persona because they know at the heart of it she's not a nice person. And everyone's going to be looking for it. And as soon as it happens, it's going to go viral. People are going to comment. People are going to make a meme. She cannot continue because it will be too difficult. The majority of her supporters would have shown more support had the producers and Ellen issued an apology much sooner. All right, next, the timing of the apology. Now, this one is easy. If you or a company you run or communicate for or if you're running for office or you're in office or a town official, if you're anyone with a name or you're working for someone with a name, no one wants to be dragged through the social mud. If they've been involved in something, if they've said something or did something that someone can comment on or share publicly on Facebook. All right. If you know that you've done something, you should already start crafting your response and your apology because before you know it, you're going to be online. Now, when do you post? Now, of course, it depends on you want to manage the issue by preempting the public. So you do want to release your statement, your acknowledgy or your apology, whatever it is, you have to rip off that band aid. It may raise questions when you just throw it out there, like what? What are they talking about? But the statement is already healing your reputation by being out there, by being out in the air. It's like open air to breathe and to heal. Or you could wait and until a comment or two comes in to get a sense of the public's take on what you need to do and comment or respond accordingly, truthfully and quickly. So the response needs to be immediate, in real time, and it needs to be injected into the initial conversation. Without it, the problem will fester and the foundation is set for your cancellation. All right, next three. What you should not do when making a public apology statement okay, so now that you've heard the importance of making the meaningful public apology and the timing of it, it's time to view specifics on what not to do when creating it. Here are the things you'll want to avoid at all costs when you are creating your public apology acknowledgement for your followers, your stakeholders, your employees, your clients, whoever they are. Okay, one. It's not using all of your outlets. One of the most important aspects of issuing a public apology is ensuring that as many people see it as possible. I talk about creating the right response on the right channel at the right time. Well, this is what I mean. Your channel. You can do it through a press conference, you can do it. Most now have to be online. You can do it through social media, you can do it through news articles on your website. You could put out a press release, you could put out a media statement. You could create a video. You could do a YouTube video. You could do it on Facebook. If you only issue a public apology via one or two of these methods, then a majority of your followers won't ever come across your apology. So if you have a video and you post it on YouTube, what that means is you don't just post it on YouTube and leave it. You post it on YouTube and then you share it on Twitter and then you share it on Facebook. You want to get it out universally. Do not bury it on your website. And then when someone starts asking, well, hey, just go to our website? No, because that will annoy people even more. It will seem like you're hiding. 2. Do not pass the blame. Even though the producers of the Ellen DeGeneres show are mostly to blame for the PR crisis, that's in quotations because Ellen DeGeneres and everybody knows Ellen DeGeneres is behind all of this. So it all goes back to Ellen. Now, a few weeks back when Ellen released, you know, her statement apologizing to her workers who were affected, what she did was pass the blame to the producers on the show. It was the opposite effect that she was hoping for. Followers of your brand, your customers are aware of who who's actually to blame for your PR crisis. You do not need to connect the dots for people. Simply apologize for the mistakes. In other words, own it. Acknowledge that your entire company is to blame and state how you avoid doing so in the future. But you remember are the head of that company or you are the person who is responsible for what happened. You can include the whole process. Ellen can talk about the production of her show, she can talk about the producers, but she needs to make clear that the buck stops with her and she did not do that. And third, taking too long. Too many businesses make the mistake of waiting for the dust to settle before issuing that public apology. So the reality is the dust won't settle until you clear the air by admitting that a mistake was made. You have to own it. So when it comes to public apologies, you want to push them out as quickly and efficiently as possible. The longer you wait, the more people will resent you for it. Look no further than Ellen DeGeneres or the long line of reputations that are in the trash bin right now because people waited or used silence. Think of it this way. Your apology needs to address three A's. Apologize, acknowledge, accept blame. All three of those A's mean you own it. They don't spell it, unfortunately, which would be nice. But it means you're taking ownership. And when you own it, it's the first step to likely a long road of recovery. But it's still you're on the right road. The Takeaway the only way to recover from a PR crisis is to respond to the PR crisis. You need to apologize in real time. Yes, there was a time when silence was an option in your crisis communications plan. That time was before Facebook, Twitter and smartphones. Next, you can set your watch to the downfall of a reputation. If the timer starts and there's no apology, just crickets. Crickets equals crisis. That's such a good line. I'M going to tweet that I'm going to start saying that again. Crickets equals crisis. Next. When you do speak up. Say it in the right place, use the right channel, and don't pass that blame on to someone else. Now that you've heard why it's so important to apologize for a PR crisis and what mistakes to avoid in the process, it's time for you to find the right help. If you are a company or an organization or represents one that wants to learn more about the right response at the right time and on the right channel, I have two new offerings. I have a keynote and a workshop, both virtual but also booking 2021 in person, about how to interact with your customers, your members, your fans, your followers, and in a cancellation climate. I've presented this to people who work in sales, marketing boards, senior leadership. With so much of operations happening online, you need to know how to create the right response on the right channel at the right time. Remember, a PR crisis often doesn't start with pr, it starts elsewhere. So if you need help, let me know. That's all for this week. Thanks so much for listening. Reach out to me on Twitter Molly McPherson and tell me what you about Ellen and the importance of the apology. I always love hearing from listeners. Bye for now.