Too Much? When To Shut Up and Take a Break. - Purity 1196

To see today's photo, go to mt4christ.org or follow me, M.t. Clark, on Facebook or Twitter. Good morning. Today's photo of the sun setting over a beach where some sit and rest while another walks alone comes to us from Dan Phillips, who captured this scene while vacationing in Sayulita, Mexico, and shared it with a photo dump of many others on social media on November 5th. Thanks for sharing, Dan. Although I should caution that dumping 75+ photos all at once may have been a bit too much. Well, it's for some anyway. Well, it's Saturday, and while I can handle all the photos you want to share on social media, I caution my friend about this, about his possibly sharing too much, because I recently just happened to receive that message yesterday. And while I say it facetiously, uh, it may in fact not be a joke because the message I received delivered a powerful punch of shame, sadness, bewilderment, shock, and some devastating real-life consequences. As I have been blogging about in part for most of the last year, I am currently attending Deeper Walk International School of Prayer Ministry and have recently been working toward meeting my final requirements for graduation and being certified as as a Deeper Walk International certified prayer minister. But yesterday I received the devastating news that I would not be certified in December as I expected, because it has been determined by my cohort leader that I lack one of the relational skills that is essential for a Deeper Walk certified prayer minister to have. I require additional time and training in the area of tuning with other people others' emotions and recognizing when others may be overwhelmed. My instructor has recommended I take Thrive Today's Building Trust: Attune vs. Overwhelm course and that I seek additional prayer ministry training opportunities with certified Deeper Walk prayer ministers to grow in my skills and improve my use of listening prayer methods like Emmanuel Prayer and Real Prayer. While I fully accept my instructor's evaluation and recommendations and will follow whatever course I have to in order to meet the requirements for certification. I have to be honest and tell you that this is a heartbreaking disappointment, as I can't help but see it as yet another failure and rejection in a very long line of failures and rejections that I have experienced in life. While I've had my fair share of failures and rejections in my life, this one hurts quite a bit quite a bit because I didn't see it coming and thought I was not only meeting the requirements for the completion of this program but thought I was excelling at it. But I guess that's part of the problem. I didn't see the signs and thought everything was fine when they weren't. And so I am acknowledging and accepting that I need to improve in the area of knowing what, what the emotional atmosphere is like when ministering to others and when I'm not— what I'm doing— and when what I am doing and saying has ceased helping and is actually overwhelming others. The instructor observed in my interactions with my colleagues in the cohort and in the stories I related from my experiences in ministering to others in the past that my enthusiasm for helping, encouraging, and instructing others, I could fail to recognize recognize when the people I minister to may be overwhelmed, and I didn't have a good gauge when others might be beyond their capacity to receive. In essence, sometimes I talk too much and don't recognize when people have heard enough or too much and need a break. When faced with awkward silences, I fill them with words instead of recognizing that I should stop. It turns out that what I thought as a skill turned out to be a weakness. In my previous roles as a teacher for Recovery and Freedom Ministry, my duty was to deliver the message. In a classroom environment, there will be those who are paying attention and there will be those who are distracted or totally tuned out. In the classroom setting, while you can engage the students to get their attention from time to time, if you address every student who seems checked out, you run the risk of losing focus and delivering the material you need to deliver. In my Freedom Ministry classes that I did in 2021, which I recorded for a podcast, there was an increased pressure to stay on message because I wasn't just teaching to those before me. So I have developed the tendency to keep talking, keep teaching until I say what I need to say. And while that may or may not have been an admirable quality in the classroom, I I suppose I revert to it when I'm in conversations that go quiet. Instead of waiting for the other person to speak or give them a break, I'll keep on talking. Okay, this is not a conversation, but if it were, I would take a long pause to listen, or at least I would like to think I would. Also, besides trying to encourage and instruct, I also try to be transparent about my life. I have learned to try to be as honest and as forthcoming in presenting myself to others, and now I am realizing that I could be guilty of oversharing. This was pointed out to me by my instructor's comments regarding a paper I submitted regarding our experience as prayer minister-client, putting ourselves in the shoes of a client for 6 sessions of prayer ministry. Where the paper called for 5 to 8 pages, and I, in my enthusiasm, submitted 14 pages plus a 2-page bibliography. And instead of asking for an extension or guidance on the length of my paper, I just submitted it, apparently overwhelming my instructor. Uh, I, I know— way— I know, I know, way to go, M.t.! Believe me, if I knew then what I know now, not only would I have reduced the word count on that paper, but I would have excused exercise the right to remain silent a lot more in class and in sharing my less than stellar experiences in ministering to others. I mean, think about it. What stories do you share in life? Do you share the stories where everything went fine and not much happened? I led Bob through the steps when we finished in 3 hours and everything went great, a good resolution without incident. Or I have had— I had this one client was manifesting demons who took over over 8 hours doing the steps before we called out to Jesus and the Holy Spirit finally set us both free. I know, 8 hours? I was learning and was along for the ride as much as leading that Freedom Appointment. I didn't push the client through that one. I was holding on and rolling with the punches. So yes, in my conversations I tend to get carried away in telling the stories of how God has moved in my life and in the life of others. Because I know how ignorant I was of who I, I am in Christ and the possibility of a life of freedom in Christ, I tend to overshare what I have come to know about living in the Spirit. And that enthusiasm and lack of discernment on my part to recognize that I can overwhelm the people I seek to encourage or help has resulted in the biggest personal failure I've had since my divorce in 2018. As much as I can see the truth of the errors of my ways and acknowledge the need for growth, the pain over the sense of failure and rejection is sharp. They say shame is the sense that not only have you done something wrong, but you feel that there is something wrong with you. And I can't help but admit that I am experiencing that today and have known it for all too long. In my life. What's wrong with me? Besides what you have admitted to thus far, M.t., would you like a list? Oh, well, no thanks. I am more than capable of doing that on my own. But I know that God loves me even though I talk too much. I know that God accepts me even though I might be a bull in a china shop of people's emotions. Emotions and limited capacities. And I know that this journey of pain has a happy ending. And I know that today is another day, and I can't go back and shut up and give people a break, but I can go forward and learn to do so in the future. So keep walking and talking with God. You won't overwhelm him, but he will probably encourage you to stop and listen when things go wrong. And you feel like a failure and the whole world rejects you. He will invite you into His grace to give you the healing and wisdom and strength to keep going when all seems lost. I always point to God's words to Cain when he was depressed over his failed sacrifice. Genesis 4:6-7 says, Then the LORD said to Cain, 'Why are you angry? Why is your face downcast?' If you do what is right, will you not be accepted? So, I'll cover my broken heart and try to turn my frown upside down and do what is right. I will accept this failure as an opportunity to grow and remember my peace and joy is found in the Lord, not my accomplishments, and that no matter what the future holds in terms of my desire to be certified by Deeper Walk International, I am secure. I am accepted. I am significant. And thank God, I am loved in Christ alone. Today's Bible verse comes to us from the Quick Scripture Reference for Counseling by John G. Cruis. This morning's meditation verses come from the section on Church: Communion of the Saints. And today's verses come from Ephesians 4:3-6. From the NLT, the Word of God says: Make every effort to keep yourselves united in the Spirit, binding yourselves together with peace. For there is one body and one Spirit, just as you have been called to one glorious hope for the future. There is one Lord, one faith, one baptism, and one God and Father, who is over all and in all, living through all. Today's verses fall under the first point of our Counseling Reference Guide's resource section on Church Communion of Saints. Uh, and that first point is: The church is one. Today's verses tell us to make every effort to be united in the Spirit, and that we should bind ourselves together with other believers to be assured of the glorious hope for our future with the one true God. Yeah, life can stink, but God has overcome the world. So regardless of our losses, let's walk in the Spirit together and tie ourselves to the enduring hope that transcends the circumstances of our lives. The church can be a place of pain as we struggle to edify one another and serve the Lord, but when we keep first things first and let go of our pride, we can have— we can experience the peace that comes from knowing that regardless of our performance or our relationships here on Earth, we are safe in God's kingdom. Forever. As always, I invite all to go to mtforchrist.org where I always share insights from prominent Christian theologians and counselors to assist my brothers and sisters in Christ with their walk. Today we are sharing from A.W. Pink's, uh, Arthur Pink Anthology as we begin the fifth, um, tract from that book, uh, called Chosen to Salvation. And apparently it's a one-parter, a short one at that, so So if you want to check it out, go to mt4christ.org, and you will see it at the end of today's blog post. Also at the end of today's blog post, you'll see our, um, uh, our encouragement to join our Victory Over the Darkness, The Bondage Breaker, or Freedom in Christ series of discipleship classes via the M.t. for Christ 247 podcast. They're available on our YouTube channel as well. Those are the classes that I just kept on teaching. So, um, and some of them I was teaching to an empty room, but I, but I kept on teaching, staying on message, uh, for the most part. And, um, they're available for you to listen to on the, uh, on the podcast today. Um, they teach you all about, uh, who you are in Christ, the spiritual forces of darkness, and how to experience your freedom in Christ, and give you the ability to arrive Rise above your failures and resolve all those personal conflicts that bring you down. So we encourage you to check those out, and we encourage you to keep living in the Spirit, to keep walking and talking with God, because regardless of what happens on earth, you're loved, you're accepted, you're significant, and you're secure in Christ alone. So we encourage that. Today it looks like it's going to be a nice day up here in the real upstate New York, and we'll be taking a walk, I think, and we'll be doing some community service work as well for Operation Adopt a Soldier. I said it, so we're gonna do it. I'm pretty sure we're gonna do it anyway. The wife's father runs the, runs the thing, so, you know, we help out where we can. And then after that, I don't know, I'm just gonna try to relax. I'm gonna have to do this the coursework I need to do, um, today for Deeper Walk, even though I know I'm not going to be certified. Um, so that's, that's a new challenge. Um, we'll be doing that in the weeks ahead. You know, I got 4 weeks to go and I already know I'm not going to make it. Like, dude, it's rough. Anyway, um, let's pray. Lord God, Heavenly Father, thank you for another day in your kingdom. We We thank you so much for all that you do. We thank you for the love that you poured out for us and the fact that we're accepted regardless of how we perform or who accepts us on earth. And even with all our sins and mistakes in life, that you brought us into your kingdom and nothing can separate us from your love, as you'll be with us always. Uh, Lord, we just thank you for that. We pray for anyone who might be listening to this, probably few, or reading this, today's message. We pray for them to be blessed, and we pray for them to be encouraged, and we pray for You to come alongside them and their prayer requests and their life of faith. Lord, we all need Your help desperately every day, and we need it— I need it too. So we just pray for You to go before us today Open our eyes to the things you want us to see. We need your healing and your help and your guidance to show us what we should do and how we should carry on. And, you know, we just need that every day because all we want to do is represent you in your kingdom, to be people who don't overwhelm other people, who have a good sense of what they're saying and how it's affecting people. And apparently we need help with that. So, um, we're asking for it, we're praying for it, and, uh, we just pray for you to be with us, um, today and every day. We thank you, we praise you, we love you, Lord, and we pray all these things in the mighty name of Jesus. Amen.