How to make better decisions (Effective vs. Ineffective Decisions)

How to make the best decisions and how to keep moving in your life so that your decisions no longer hold you back—that's what we're going to be talking about today. So, if you're having trouble making a decision, if you have some unmade decisions in your life, stay tuned. All right. So, one of the biggest things that I deal with with my clients is. Making decisions. So that's the first thing quite often that I will teach somebody when they come to me. And it'll start with making a decision as to whether or not we're going to work together or not. And it's really not my business whether somebody decides to work with me or not. The point that I want to make is that making a decision is very important. So if you need to go and think about it and you need to go and weigh all your options and you're the kind of person who has a process of decision-making that is very slow, Then that is you just need to evaluate whether or not that works for you or not. So some people will have that process of decision making, and they think it's a good way to make decisions. But are they really getting where they want to go? That's all I want to ask, right? So if it's working for you really well, and you're happy with the results that you're getting in your life from that process of decision making, then totally fine. Continue how you are. But if you realize that you're not actually getting the results you want, it's possible. That your decision-making process could be improved. So that's what I want to talk to you about today. So deciding versus not deciding. All of our power is in our decisions. Decisions are made in a minute. You can think about it for years, but it's literally made in a minute. Think about all the decisions that you've made that had gotten you to the results you have in your life. So maybe it was making a decision to get married, making a decision to accept an offer, making a decision to Get a dog. All of the decisions that you've made in your life have been made in a minute. Thought happens instantaneously. When you say, I need to think about the decision, what you're saying is, is that you are not, not in that moment taking responsibility for moving your life forward. The longer you stay in an unmade decision, the longer you postpone your results, whatever those results are going to be. The moment you make a decision, that gives you the power to then move forward and go from there. But the longer you hang out in an unmade decision land, the longer it's gonna take you to actually move forward in your life. Because the only way that we can know what the right path is, is by taking a step forward and seeing what's there at that forward step. And when we don't do that, we literally are paralyzed and stuck in the same spot. So why do we do that? Why are we normally so often stuck in indecision and the place of I need to think about it more? So the reason is, is because of fear. We are afraid to make the quote unquote wrong decision about something, right? We're afraid that the decision we make is going to be wrong, or it's not going to get us where we want to go. And there's always that uncertainty with Everything, right? So the only way to move forward is to make the decision, right? And so there are some ways, and I'm going to explain in this video how we can move forward in the best way for us and how we can make sure that we are using the proper process of decision-making in order to get the results that we want. So there's some questions to ask, and I'm going to talk to you about those, and I'm going to give you everything I can here. Here in this video on how to make the best decision for you. But the point I wanna make super clear is that the longer we hang out in that indecision, the slower our life moves, the less we get done, the less we achieve, the less results we create for ourselves. And when that's happening, we miss out on what we could be doing. We miss out on learning. We miss out on evolving as people. Because we're stuck in fear and indecision. So I'm calling this decision impotence, failure to move forward. Like failure to make decisions consistently is going to keep you impotent in your life, basically. Like you're not gonna be able to perform what, to the level that you want to. So it's kind of funny. I kind of think it's a funny term, but that's kind of how I see it. Like it's, it's impotence. Like you can't do anything when you're stuck in a place of not being able to make a decision. Right. Right? And it's a safe place to be. It's like, well, I just don't know. I need to think about it. I need to weigh all my options. Like I said, if that works for you, if you're okay with making really slow decisions, if you're okay with moving slowly in your life and you're okay with not getting the results that you want in a timely manner, totally, that's fine, right? I'm just saying that if you want to achieve a result, the power is in your decision-making to get there. So if you haven't achieved the result you want yet, it's because you haven't learned to make the right decisions yet to get there. And that is what I want to drive home in this video. All right. Now I want to give you some questions to ask yourself to help you make the decision. So let's say you want to choose between 2 jobs, right? And you're not sure which offer to take. One question that I really like to ask is, What if both of those jobs turned out amazing? Which one would you want? So if they were both like the best case scenario, dream jobs, you were able to reach maximum impact in both of the roles, which one would you take? And that removes any worry of like, oh, one's gonna be better than the other, right? Because you get to create that once you choose one. You get to go in there, you get control over how well it turns out. So which one would you choose, assuming they both turn out amazing? Second question, if you're deciding whether or not to do something or not to do something, does it feel restrictive when you think about doing it, or does it feel expansive when you think about doing it? Right? How do you feel when you think about making the decision? That's a really clear indicator of what your body and what your soul really wants. So keep that in mind. Ask yourself that question. Another fun way that I've seen to do it is if you flip a coin, right? So if you've got a decision you got to make and you say, okay, if heads, if I get heads, this is the decision I'm going to make. Flip the coin, see what you get, and then see how you feel when you get the answer, the random answer, right? So I've seen this happen once where a girl was trying to decide on her niche for her business. So she was like, I don't know if I want to do like help women with like their body image issues or whether I want to be a personal trainer. Right? And so that was 2 different courses, 2 different certifications that she was going to have to take. And so the coin was flipped and it landed on personal trainer, and she was super bummed out. She was like, oh. And in that moment, she was like, I know exactly what I want to do. Sometimes getting clarity on that kind of like without even knowing it can really help you figure out what it is that you actually really want. In your heart, so that's a cool trick. Okay, another question you can ask: Is the decision coming from fear of failing, fear of not being able to do it, lack or scarcity? Like I don't have the money, I can't. Is it coming from that place, or is it coming from this is what I want for my future? Is it coming from your vision from your future? Is it coming from your future self, or is it coming from your past self? I notice a lot of times. We live in our past. We think that we can only do what we've done before, which is a huge misconception, and it's literally impossible for that to be true, right? Because we've seen lots of people achieve lots of things they never achieved before, including yourself. If you're now walking, you never used to walk when you were a baby. You figured it out, right? You knew— like, you didn't know how to do it, but you did it. That's something to watch for. If you're making a decision from what's been possible in the past for you, Then you're not making a decision from what's possible in the future for you. So if it's about buying something, spending a bunch of money on something, and you're thinking, oh, but I've never been able to do this in the past, I've never done this before, like then you could be coming from fear and lack. And if you're coming from fear and lack, where else in your life are you coming from fear and lack? And do you want to live your life in fear and lack? Or do you want to live your life in abundance and what you want for your future? So have you really asked yourself, what do I really want for my future and what will I need to do to get there? And what would my future self say to do right now? Because if you're going to move forward in a new direction that you've never moved before, you will need to make some decisions that are going to be different than the ones you've been making. And it's going to be a bit scary because you've never done it before. So that's where trusting yourself comes In, right? And the trust that you have with yourself to show up, do the work, make it work, get the results for yourself, take that 100% responsibility for your decision and have your own back. That's where you get to move forward in your life and create results that you've never created before. That's what's gonna be necessary for you to move forward. And a lot of people are not willing to do that. A lot of people will stay in fear and lack. They will stay in feeling scared, and they will end up complaining and believing the story that it's not possible for them because they've never done it before. And that's fine if that's what you want. If you're willing to sacrifice, you know, your results and what you could have for that story, then that's up to you. But I just want to make you aware that in order to move forward, in order to make what you want possible, you need to take some steps forward that are going to be more difficult, right? They're going to be a little bit scary, but the more you do it, the more you can trust yourself to create the results you want. And that's how you start moving forward. And that's how you just start becoming a person who makes tough decisions, makes those decisions successful, and then moves from there. And then you make more decisions. The amount of decisions you make in your life Will drive you to decision-making confidence. So if you don't make a lot of decisions right now, if you're if you're hanging out in that place of I don't know, I'm gonna think about this, I'm gonna weigh all my options, I'm gonna weigh the pros and cons, I will do it later. If if that's kind of where you hang out in your mind on a regular basis, then you're probably a slow decision maker. And I've heard people say this. I have friends who've said this. They're like, well, it might take me a year to make a decision, but when I make it, I know I've. I've made a really good decision. And I'm thinking that could be true for you. But imagine if you made 12 decisions in that year, how much farther ahead would you actually be? Because it's like trying to read a book on how to swim, right? You can read a book on how to swim all you want, and you can study that book very carefully and ruminate over that book and look at the strokes that you've got to take and kind of in your mind play out how the swimming would go. Or you could make the decision to jump in the pool, and you can make the decision to jump in the pool every week, every month, right? If you did that, how far along, how much farther along would you be than if you were sitting on the couch reading that book, right? And yes, sitting on the couch reading that book about swimming is going to be a lot more comfortable for you. Right? Getting in the pool is not going to be as comfortable for you. But where do you think the learning happens? Where do you think you become the strong swimmer? Where do you think you become the person who knows exactly how to swim? It's not from reading the book because it's literally not possible for you to know how to swim until you get in the pool. That's the example I want to offer you. If you are thinking and thinking and thinking And you believe that's a good way to make the decision, you have to be okay with having a very, very slow-moving result. You have to be okay with having your life move very, very slowly, and you're sacrificing results for comfort, right? And if you're okay with that, that's totally fine. But if you want to move forward faster and you want to get the result you want, it's going to take powerful decision-making. And some discomfort, yes. But once you start to see that, the discomfort will not be such a big deal anymore because it'll be who you are. You'll be the person who understands what they need to do to get what they want, to meet their goal, to create the results they want in their life. That's what I have to offer you. Yes, it might be a tough sell. It's a lot more comfortable to stay in, I'm gonna think about it, but it's a lot more powerful to say yes or no because then you can move from there. And sitting in, I'm going to think about it, doesn't serve you. There's really no upside to it. All you get is comfort and safety. And if that's what you're looking for, then by all means, you are your own person and you can decide to choose comfort and safety. That's where you have to ask yourself, who do I want to be? Do I want to be the person who stays in comfortable, in comfortable and safety mode? Or do I want to go after that result that I want and get it? So there's Effective decision-making and ineffective decision-making. So I don't believe there's anything— there's any such thing as a right or wrong decision. I believe that there's a decision that gets you closer to where you want to go, or a decision that keeps you stuck, or a decision that sets you back. That's where you have to ask yourself, if you want something and you've been trying to get it for a while, have your decisions kept you in the same place? Held you back or moved you forward? Are you making progress? Do you feel like you're making significant progress in that direction, or are you stuck? Do you feel like you haven't made progress in a long time, or have you taken a step backwards? That is all in your decision-making and what you created with your decisions. So that's what you have to ask yourself. So I don't believe there's a right or wrong, right? I just believe there's an effective and an ineffective way to make decisions. And if you get really good at making effective decisions, you will be able to create anything you want. And imagine how powerful you feel when you get really confident in your decision-making. And lastly, I want to talk about the ultimate formula to get what you want. And that is very simple. It's you decide, then you implement what you decided, and then you evaluate it, and then you move through that cycle over and over and over until you get what you want. So for example, someone decides they're going to sign up for coaching with me. We have our first call, they implement everything they learned, then they come back and they evaluate it with me, and they go back out, they make some more decisions, they implement, they evaluate. And the faster they do this, the better they get at doing this, the faster they get their results. Which is why I advocate fully for— it's possible to get yourself A better job in as little as 30 days when you become committed, you make a firm decision, you implement, and you evaluate what you learned, and you go back out there, right? And then you can create even more for your life. So how much money do you want to make? How much value do you want to add? How— like, what promotion do you want to have? What title do you want to have? You can create all that through the power of your decision-making. I hope this has been helpful for you. Decision-making has been what has got me where I want to go, and it has been the single most powerful tool that you can adopt and use and become aware of in your life. So if you're the person who's sitting there thinking, I need to think about my decisions very carefully, I need to ruminate over them, I need to analyze them, I need to weigh all the pros and cons, ask yourself, is that working for you? Are you getting the results you want in your life right now? If you're not, you're probably just moving really, really slowly. And if you're okay with that, that's totally fine. If you want to move faster, I can help you with that. So my name is Natalie Fisher. I'm a certified career mindset coach, and you can find me at www.nataliefisher.ca. I also have a free training for you. It's called Get a Better Job in 30 Days. We talk about how to create your own opportunities. We talk about how to interview, all the things that you are in complete control of to get your better job in 30 days. We talk about salary negotiation and how to handle those conversations powerfully. And if you're wondering, um, why I'm using my— this microphone is because I just started a podcast. I'm going to be posting that podcast. It's going to be up on YouTube as well, so you can find it there. You can also find it on iTunes. Please leave me a review if you like this content. There's going to be a lot more on the podcast where that came from. If you like this video, give me a thumbs up. If you hated the video, give me a thumbs down. Please subscribe to the channel if you're not already. And yeah, the microphone kind of like— I'm not using my hands so much anymore. And so somebody made a comment to me. They said that my, my content was just a bunch of— they used a rude word and then they said it was gesticulation. And I just want to say thank you for teaching me a new word because I didn't know what that meant. I looked it up. It just means a lot of gesturing. So I guess I was using my hands a bit too much, but that's just kind of how I am. I just use my hands a lot with my gestures. But if you don't like it, totally understand. You don't have to watch the video, but thanks for teaching me a new word. And this microphone might help because I'm not using my hands as much anymore because I've, I've got them occupied by my new microphone, which I also think it's going to be a lot better quality sound for you guys. So anyways, thank you so much for watching and I will see you next week with another video.