9 Brutal Lessons I Learned in 2025 I Wish I Knew Earlier

I've got nine mindset lessons I learned in 2025. I want to go through each one, tell you a story and tell you what impact it had on my life so that maybe it could serve you at where you're at right now. The first one is every level requires a new level of letting go. Learning to let go continuously becomes a theme in my life. What beliefs do I have that keep me stuck? What are areas of my life that I know better? That if I just learned to let go would change everything in my business? And that for me, this year was a big takeaway, is that every new level has a new devil. And part of that devil to defeat it requires to let go. That's one. Two people will attack you when you surpass them. It's human nature. See, it sucks that, like, there's probably people that you worked with a long time ago, went to school with a long time ago, are probably good friends of yours today that were your cheerleader, your fans, they supported you. They wanted to see you well, do well in life until the moment you surpass them. I don't know if you can resonate with this, but I guarantee there's something you've done recently where somebody criticized you for doing it and you might take it as like, why would they do that? That's not nice. Like, why can't they support me? I'm telling you that on the come up, the people that were your biggest fans have to criticize you because in the moment that you surpass, you've essentially showed them where they let go. You showed them where they chose comfort, where they chose simple, where they chose an easy life. And you did it. You literally woke up and decided, I'm going to do the hard thing, even though I don't want to do it. I could just lay in bed. That's easy. I could eat whatever I want. That's easy. I could watch whatever I want. That's easy. But no, you made the right decision and then you've grown. And in doing so, you show people where they gave up. And this year, I got attacked. I got attacked in the comments. I got attacked from peers. I got attacked from people that literally I thought were like, my friends. I'm talking like close friends. And I kept coming back to this. The moment you surpass somebody, you've essentially shown them where they could have. They could have went with you. Like, that's the crazy part is I want to see everybody win. And instead of them going like, oh, so cool that you did this, teach me how no, they got to talk about me behind my back. They think you don't hear it. That's the crazy part is they, you. They think that nobody's going to tell me if you surpass other people, they will celebrate you on the come up and then as soon as you go too far, they can't help but start to attack and just know that it's coming and it's their own journey. And I actually have no feelings around it other than I really hope they get back on the train because it's a lot of fun to win. Third, the energy you put into a project, the energy that is that you feel connected like right now, me and you. This energy hopefully is felt by the person watching. So the energy in is felt from the people out. That to me is such a big idea. As I worked on my book this year, that's a big. That's where I continue to come back to it is I've been so excited about the content that I've been, I've been working on and creating and the ideas. Actually, I said I have nine. I have a bonus one for you today that comes from that, that I'm continuously reminded when I grabbed snippets and I share it on my Instagram and the reactions I get or I'm speaking and I go, you know, there's something I wrote about this morning and I share it and everybody's like, oh my gosh, that's so good. And when I think about where the inspiration or the feeling, even this list today, when I sat down this morning and I was connected to the energy of like the reflection and then also the excitement to share it with you today. Like the energy that goes in to a creative project goes out to the audience, goes out to the viewer, out to the the reader. And I think that's something that most people don't understand. Like if you're working on something and you don't feel it, guess what? The person that's going to use it won't feel it. The person's going to watch it won't feel it. The customer won't feel it. So honor yourself and make sure you're only doing things that you like, resonate with. Don't diminish the standard to make everybody happy. Fight for what you feel is great. That is number three. Number four, your life. Oh, that is so good. Your life is the byproduct of your most dominant thoughts, actions and feelings, people. Period. Full stop. How you show up with your thoughts, how those thoughts drive your actions, how Your actions, drives, your emotions, those. And when I say dominant, the ones you think about most often, that's what shapes your life. When you hear me say, the world isn't as it is, the world is as you are, that's what I mean. When you realize that being the person who has $10 million is how you get $10 million, not having it will change everything. Because most people wouldn't want things if it didn't give them the emotions that it comes with. Like if you're thirsty and you want water and the water doesn't quench your thirst, you don't want water. You want whatever's gonna quench your thirst. You want the feeling that comes with the thing. If you want a nice house, it's not the nice house you want. You want the sense of accomplishment and maybe safety. You want the feeling if the house didn't provide that, you wouldn't want it. And that's why Your life is 100% the byproduct. Your most dominant. Write that down, underline it all. Caps, bold, dominant, actions, feelings and thoughts. And that I will continue to come back to number five. Oh, this is so good. These are all great, but as I read them, I'm just, like, reconnected with it. You've never gotten better when things were easy. Never, ever, ever in the history of mankind, there's no person that has said to themselves, I completely transformed my life when things were great. It's never happened. It will never happen. Because pain is the perfect teacher. Pain will literally teach you the lesson that you've been avoiding. And anytime life got hard and I realized that it was teaching me exactly what I needed to at that moment, I got excited. So I want to encourage you to use this philosophy, because this will change everything if you can get to this place, is that when things are hard, you respond with, good challenge, good setback, good. Somebody mad at you, good. Massive frigging debacle. Good. Why we're the opponent, worthy opponent. See, I know that a lot of people go on this journey of life, and if they actually start to have a little bit of success, they get to a place where it can kind of feel complacent, where things are good. They had nothing. They have something, and then they feel good about themselves. The problem is, is they're not looking for bigger challenges. You know, they're not looking for new levels, new devils, bigger monsters. To me, anytime I have a massive challenge, I go, good. If my problems are not big enough, I get worried. Bigger the problem, the bigger the life. And you've never gotten better. If there weren't challenges, and if you can reframe those in the moment instead of, like, slow stepping back from them but actually leaning into them because you say good, worthy opponent, it'll change everything for you. I know a lot of people watch me because they feel a level of connection and confidence in my words, because I can't teach what I haven't lived. So everything I'm teaching, hopefully you get that from my stories. These are deep moments where I had to go from the version I was through that challenge to the person I am. And one of those areas that is the point that I want to share is around confidence. Number six, confidence is the reputation that you have with yourself. It's the reputation you have with yourself. It's the conversation you have with yourself. That conversation around being consistent, doing what you say you're going to do, following the commitments you make yourself in private. Right? So, for example, when I speak and people go like, man, when you talk, it's. It's. I can feel you. And it's just. It doesn't look like you're scared or nervous. It's like, well, because my confidence comes from my intention. My confidence comes from my consistency. And before I get on stage, I asked my creator to use me to serve the people. And then it's just a conversation of trying to figure out, how can I add value and pour into other people because my reputation with me is intact. See? See what I'm saying? Like, the confidence is your reputation you have with yourself. And if you don't trust yourself, if you don't appreciate your discipline, if you don't appreciate the right choices, if you don't, you know, reflect and. And celebrate your accomplishments, then how do you build that reputation? Here's what I know. If most people had somebody speak to their spouse, their partner, their brother, their sister, the way they speak to themselves, you would punch that person or in the face. And yet you talk to yourself that way. Again, confidence is a byproduct of the reputation you have with yourself. So work on that reputation. Be more consistent. Be more giving. Make what you do for others. Be a good person. See, most people have a hard time sharing who they are because they have a lot of shame around who they are. And that internal narrative holds people from shining their light massively huge. Number seven, it's either a hell yes or it's a heck, no. The more you honor this, kind of like the excitement. Another way to ask yourself this is if whatever you've been asked to do is tonight would you do it? And if the answer is like no, then don't say maybe, don't say yes. Just say it's not a fit. And guess what? No is a complete sentence and it ends with a period. You're allowed to say no. What if they get upset? Blah, blah, blah. Hey, that's their journey. All I know is that I've never been upset when I've said yes enthusiastically. Things that were like, of course I want to do that, versus like, mediocre replies like, yeah, I guess we could do that. No. Fun fact. I was just at the gym, some guy recognized me and he's like, hey, man, if you're in town for the next couple days, I'd love to have you on my podcast. My internal thermometer said no. I said, I appreciate the opportunity, but unfortunately the calendar scheduled. The answer is no because it wasn't a hell yes. It could have been a hell yes, but it wasn't. Am I upset about my decision? No, because my gut said, mayor, honor yourself. You know, I've been doing this talk for a really well known guy who is incredibly amazing. I've been supporting his project for the last two years, and this year it went from hell yes, hell yes for the last two years to I just don't think it's fit anymore. And that was a tough one because there was a commitment and a conversation and a kind of a mutual support for each other. But even really incredible opportunities, like, I know everybody watching this would be like, I can't believe you're going to say no. Yep. Not because it's not great. It's because it's just not fit anymore for me and what I want to do. And when I start to feel like that, I'm just. I've learned the more I can honor that and just approach it right away when I start to feel that way and not let it linger, that it usually creates the space for something more amazing to come into. See how that works. Number eight. You can't complain about the outcomes for the work you didn't do so good. You can't complain about the outcomes for the work you didn't do. As a content creator, my expectations for myself are way up here. And even though our team hit the goals for the year, okay, my expectations are here. We hit our goals that were here. There's a delta. That's the outcome that I wanted. And then I had to reflect myself on this. Right. I can't be. I can't complain for the outcomes for the Work I didn't do. Why didn't I do the work? Well, I had to remind myself. I decided to travel the world this year with my family. That's not a great environment to create content. I decided to focus 97% on Martell Ventures, my AI venture studio, not on media. I only allocate three hours a week to create content for my team, not a scenario where they have unlimited access to me. So how can I complain about an outcome I want for the work that I'm not willing to do? That's just honesty. And you got to look at yourself and say, like, oh, I wish my content was popping off. Are you actually giving it a 10 out of 10 or are you doing some 6 out of 10? Are you lobbing up? Are you inconsistent? Like, just. Just don't complain. Be honest with yourself if the work ethic isn't there. Quality, drive, consistency. You can't complain for the outcome you didn't get. And number nine, don't take criticism from people whose life you don't want to live. As I read in the comments, and there's all these people and they're talking about, you know, I don't like the. I don't like his hair. I don't like what he said. I don't agree the statistics and who would want to live. And I'm thinking there, and I'm like, at first I. Now I go, do I want their life? Like, can I just assume what kind of life a person that would take the time out of their day to leave a comment on my social media is living? And if I wouldn't trade places, why would I accept that criticism? Now, that's an easy one to dismiss the people in the comments. The harder one is somebody that you consider a massive mentor in your life. You know, years ago, I hired somebody I look up to. He is incredibly wealthy. He taught me a lot. And as I got to know him, got closer to him, I started to see the cracks in the character. And as a young person that's easily influenced by people that were way further along, I kind of made exceptions. I accepted things that I wouldn't have accepted from a friend, things that were said, comments that were made requests of me that I just absolutely didn't agree with. Just. It was just these little tiny things that I just kept overlooking them. And then eventually I said to myself, I don't want that person's life. I wanted to learn the skill that they taught me. I wanted to be mentored around the thing that I saw them do. World class levels at but when I got close enough to actually see the life they lived and the challenges they had with their health and the challenges they had with their friendships and the challenges they had with their family, I was like, no. And eventually I just created some space. Stop replying to the text messages, stopped checking in, stop showing up. And I created space because I had to be honest with myself. Why would I take feedback? Why would I take coaching? Why would it be mentored by somebody whose life I do not want just because of a financial level of success they achieved when other areas of their life are not things that I aspire to? It's a dangerous strategy and a lot of people fall into those are nine. Those are nine strategies from levels and devils and people will attack you and the byproduct of life and all these things. Review this Confidence is your reputation out of yourself. I want to give you a bonus. One is Unhealed pain becomes company policy now, company policy could be your family company. Like, think about it. Unhealed pain becomes company policy. If you have unhealed pain, you might be creating rules for your kids that make no sense. If you have unhealed pain around how you learn to deal with the world, you might be creating policies in your business that are going to keep you stuck where you're always asking people like, hey, work on this, but come see me. Hey, work on this, but come see me. Hey, before you make a decision, come see me. Like, there's all these weird permutations of the unhealed pain, but it literally shows up in the way you talk with your team and the policies you enforce amongst your team. If you ever get to spend time with me, you'll notice one thing. I am almost from your lens, typically irresponsibly hands off, because you don't understand the work that went in behind the scenes, the conversations, the chats, the coaching, the support, the training, et cetera, where I can feel absolutely comfortable in letting go in a way where I don't expose myself to massive pain as well, because that's also unhealed pain. Being a doormat is unhealed pain. Being a dictator is an unhealed pain. And when you realize, like I said earlier, the world will show you where you're not free and you choose to do that work, you'll start to feel weightless. You know, it's like having a backpack full of big rocks and every time you work on something, you take that rock out and you put it down, the backpack feels a lot lighter and you keep doing the work and keep walking. You keep climbing that mountain. The backpack feels a lot lighter. That weightless way of living is what I want for you. A lot of the spiritual gurus of the world will call it enlightenment. I just call it doing the work. And if you'll honor these mindsets, these nine mindsets that I share with you, plus the bonus one, I guarantee 2026 is going to be a completely different year for you. If you internalize them and work on them and apply them, 2026 will be a breakout year for you. Even if 2025 is an amazing year, 2026 even better. So let me know on everything I just shared with you, what's the one thing you needed to hear most below in the comments? I want to read every one of them. I want to hear from you. Post your answer below. And with that, I'll see you guys next week. Peace. Later.