Episode Eight: The Self-Control of Fred Rogers

Welcome to The Neighborhood, a Mr. Rogers tribute podcast. I'm your host, Rick Lee James, of rickleejames.com, and I run the Mr. Rogers Quotes Twitter account found @MrRogersSay. As we again walk into this podcast neighborhood, we want you to know that no matter where you are from, you are welcome here. I'm glad to be your neighbor. Every daughter, every son, every tribe, and every tongue, in the spirit of Fred Rogers and the life of welcome that he lived. Welcome to the neighborhood. This week in the neighborhood, our subject is self-control.

He is our very own version of Mr. McFeely, always delivering good conversation for us on this program. He's an expert at helping people tell their stories. He provides engaging, innovative media for public radio, public television, and public events. He's the executive producer and host of Things Not Seen: Conversations About Culture and Faith, which airs weekly in Chicago on WYLL 1160 AM and is distributed by PRX. He's also the executive producer of the Francis Effect podcast. David Dalt Welcome back to the neighborhood, Rick.

It's always so good to be with you. Thank you again.

Well, it is always an honor to get to spend a few minutes with you. It seems like this is the only time we really get to connect is when we do these shows, so I'm, I'm always glad for the conversation. But how's the weather there in Chicago? It's getting very chilly here in Ohio right now.

Yeah, we had, we had an unseasonably warm fall up until about a week ago, and now The temperature is plummeting, and I think yesterday it was in, in the high 30s at its low. And so it's, it's starting to get more fall-like and more winter-like, and I'm now layering up, which— it's my favorite time of year, so I'm just, I'm very, very pleased with the weather. I think other people complain about the cold, but I love it.

Well, good for you. You're in a good place if you like cold, that's for sure. Well, well, this week we are talking about self-control And I can't believe we are already into episode 8. And our plan was to do 9 episodes in this first season. And, and we are doing that. And we actually have some exciting bonus episodes that are coming up, one of which people are going to get to hear about later in the show about a new Mr. Rogers album. And we're even going to be playing one of the songs by Mickey Dolenz from that album. So it's, it's an exciting time to be a follower of Mr. Rogers and all things that Fred left behind. But we've We've got a number of bonus episodes coming up in the very near future, so I'm excited about that. But today we're talking about self-control, and I know as always you have some thought-provoking conversation points, and I'd love to hear what your thoughts are about Fred Rogers as they relate to self-control today.

Well, one of the things that I was thinking about when I learned that this was the topic was my own road to self-control. That's been a long journey for me. And one of the things that I've noticed along the way— I come from a recovery tradition, and, and we, we talk in the recovery traditions about if you spot it, you got it. In other words, if you're really being annoyed by something someone else is doing, it probably means that it's something that is a struggle for you that you're just not wanting to name. And so you're trying to really micromanage it in somebody else. And so what I've noticed is that, you know, the times when I lack self-control I really get very, very intense about someone else's habits or someone else's inability to exert control over themselves. And that kinda leads to a double damage because I'm not being honest to myself and I'm being really non-neighborly to someone else. And so I have been trying in the last few years to slow down and to be really honest about the moments when I feel that trigger of like really wanting to control someone else's behavior and start to look start to look closely at myself and to see, you know, what is it that I'm not admitting right now? And I wonder, do you struggle with that, or do you think about that ever?

Yes, I have thought about that, actually. I'm really glad you brought that up because, um, I don't know if— I think you're touching on this, but I often find that the things that we are most critical of others about are often the things that we are struggling with the most ourselves. I don't know that that's always the case, but I think I've probably heard a number of sermons over the years from preachers who I've wondered, like, why are they hitting on this so hard today? Especially if it's something that I don't maybe particularly have as big of a struggle with, but it seems like that's the thing they just come back to again and again. Or certain people that there's some things that they just are really critical of people on, like you had mentioned. And how often have I, have I found out later on that that person is struggling with that very thing? Maybe it's alcohol, or maybe it's pornography, or maybe even, you know, a problem to struggling— struggle to be faithful to a spouse, things like that. I have found many times that the shortcomings that so many of us have, and, and probably myself included, if I would get real critical of myself, the things that I can be so critical of others about are probably things that I'm struggling with too. I wonder what your thoughts are about that, because at least that's how I feel.

Well, yeah, I think that you, you've said it exactly right, and that is, you know, we have to be very generous with the people that we meet. I, I remember something that I saw on Facebook a few months ago, that every person that you meet is struggling on a journey that you know nothing about, and you should be gentle with them along the way. You know, I, as I've been in my own recovery, I recognize that many, many people have survived various types of trauma. Many, many people, you know, put on the brave face every day and do what they can to get through the day. But if I expect every person that I meet to be fantastic and I am the only one who gives myself the slack to say, but I'm still working on it, I'm really not being very generous and I'm not being very honest about the very conditions that we're living in. In our world today, everyone, everyone that I meet has a story to tell. Everyone that I meet has some kind of trauma or some kind of thing that they are trying to overcome, to better in themselves. And I think everyone, for the most part, is working hard every day to get along and be kind. And some days it's really, really hard to remember that, but I try to remember that. And we've talked on this, uh, on this program before about habits, and I think that as we're talking about self-control You know, self-control is a habit, but self-control demands a sort of parallel habit, and that is generosity, because your struggle to control yourself should make you aware that other people are struggling with that same sort of issue or are struggling with issues of their own.

Very true. And I think that, you know, one step that maybe can help with that is if we are able to do some self-examination and begin to admit our own faults. You know, what isn't confessed can't very well be healed and can't very well be helped. And I think maybe that's one of the ways that we can help to overcome these type things is if we can begin to be people who are able to be more self-critical in healthy ways, you know, in ways that— and reaching out to other people as well. I think one of the best things we can do is find those trusted friends and, and say, you know what, I'm struggling with this and I could really use your help. Could you help me? Um, and so often that is a very humbling thing to do. Um, but it can be so fruitful in our lives and, and lead to such rich blessings along the way, I think. But those are just, I don't know, some of my thoughts on it, I guess.

Well, and so as, as you're saying that and talking about having people to help you along this journey in healthy ways, I was thinking about a story that my wife shared with me. It's one of her favorite books. It's a novel by Chaim Potok called My Name Is Asher Lev. And what you— what the listeners need to know about the story is it's about a young boy with incredible artistic ability who's born into a very deeply observant Orthodox Jewish family, and they don't recognize his talent, and they, they don't want to encourage his talent, even though he ends up becoming a world famous world-class artist by the end of the two books that deal with his story. But the interactions between Asher Lev and his father are informative to our conversation today because one of the things that Asher Lev's father keeps coming back to is, "You must control these urges that you have to draw. You're a human being and you can't tell me that you don't have control. You're not an animal." And what that does is it sets up this possibility in the reader's mind that maybe passion and talent discipline and ability are on the opposite side of self-control.

Hmm.

But one of the things that I love about that book is that what we find by the end of it is that that's not the case at all. Asher Lev is incredibly disciplined by the time that he becomes a, a fully known artist. He's incredibly self-controlled. He has learned to channel his passion into technique. It's not an either/or, but to get there, he had to do it at great personal cost because he lost connections with his family. He was not supported along the way. He had to learn to do it himself. And what I love in what you said a moment ago, Rick, was how much of a blessing it is when we're able to find and surround ourselves with people who are able to recognize the places where we struggle and our talents, and sometimes see those as two sides of the same coin, and to encourage us without making us feel ashamed in our journey.

Hmm, that's— that, yeah, I think you're right on. The money with that for sure. And, and you know, there is something to, you know, when we're creating that we do have self-control and, and finding that balance that you're talking about, it sometimes is, is great, you know, learning the balance between a passionate artistic soul and self-mastery. And something that came to my mind, and this is going to wander outside of the realm of Fred Rogers for just a second, but it makes me think of this story that was very helpful to me a while back. One morning I was eating breakfast and I turned on the TV and Billy Joel was being interviewed, you know, the pop singer, Uptown Girl, you know, all the old hits. And they were interviewing him at a piano and they were asking him about his habits of writing. And as a writer myself, a songwriter, and both someone who likes to write in other ways, I was interested to hear what he had to say. And at this point, Billy Joel had already retired. It had been just a few years ago. And he said that each morning whenever he gets up, he still will go down to his studio and sit at his piano and make himself play for an hour and write for an hour. And he says sometimes he will just play the same thing over and over again that he's done before, and he says that hour kind of drags by and he doesn't feel like there's anything really fresh and new, but he does it anyway. But he said more often than not, he'll sit down and the first few minutes feel a little bit mechanical, but then somewhere along the way, by his being there, he starts to find new ideas and he starts writing things that he hadn't written before and playing new things. And he says sometimes that hour will turn into 2 hours or 3, or I'm just so taken in by the moment and the creativity that flows from the discipline of being there to do it. And the thing that he said that to me as a creative person and as someone who wants to have self-control, this is the thing he said that really stuck with me. He said, and if I hadn't been there, I would have missed it. And I think that really speaks a lot to the idea about, you know, as we're talking about this idea of being creative and mixing that with our self-control, and even thinking about the self-control that Fred had in his own life, whether it was his strict time of going to bed at night and his time of waking up in the morning very early for prayer, and then being committed to everyday swimming laps in the pool, and then his time he set aside for writing each day. And and the places that he set aside, I think the idea of self-control and, and making time and being disciplined about it, they really can help us to become much more productive in what we do.

I think that that's true, but I think that there's also another side to that coin, and that is for those of us who live hectic lives and who are not always so well organized Carving out an hour to do something that is basically just a showing up in the habit, that sounds good, but sometimes it takes a lot of effort to get there. And I want to say in my own life, and I want to also say this for listeners who may be struggling with this, it took me many years to get to the point where I had those kind of daily attentions to self-maintenance and to creative care. And one of the things that that made me think about as well is, you know, when I look at my children, you know, my two children are living a very different reality than I lived as a child. And I say this sometimes to my wife, Kira. I say, you know, right now my daughter is 9 and my son is 8. And I would say to my wife, by this point in my life, you know, there had been tremendous violence and my parents were divorced and my, my world had been shattered. And watching the difference between how my kids are navigating the world and how I was sort of failing to navigate the world at that same age. Sometimes that makes me feel really bad inside, and I have the experience, Rick, sometimes of watching my children at 9 and 8 exercise more self-control than I'm able to exercise in certain situations at 48 years old. And it, it made me think, Rick, that there was a song that Mr. Rogers saying, "What do you do with the mad that you feel?" And it made me want to ask the question, "What do you do with the shame that you feel when you see where you want to be, but you realize that you're not nearly there yet?" I'd be interested in your thoughts on that.

Yeah, well, and first, as you ask that question, and I want to say how, you know, sorry I am that, you know, different ones of us have different stories when we're growing up and the hard things that you went through. I'm sorry you went through those things. I'm glad that you've been able to make such a change in your own life, and that you're even able to see that in your children is an amazing thing. And that, that tells a lot about who you are as a person. And I want to say I echo what you say, because I'm not there yet either.

With—

I don't have the hour a day yet, you know, where I sit down and allow myself to to be that creative person. So I don't think we should shame ourselves for those things. And I want to say too, as I go into this thought pattern here, being shameless, being without shame, I think it can be disastrous on some things. And what I think about when I say that, there is such a thing maybe as a little bit of healthy shame that is good. There was a movie I saw years ago called Spanglish. And in that film, there's a character who is— she's been unfaithful to her spouse again and again. And her mother Evelyn is talking to her, and the daughter is Deborah, the person who is played by Tia Leone. She's the one having the affair. And the mother Evelyn says to the daughter, she says, Honey, lately your low self-esteem is just good common sense, she says to her. Because there's— there is a good kind of shame that can actually lead us to change and lead us to better patterns. And it can be disastrous if we're without shame entirely. But more often than not, the shame that we have, I think, is not deserved because we will be ashamed of things that happen to us rather than things that we have done. And in some ways, it's like being ashamed for being hit by a car. Are, you know. We shouldn't have shame for something like that, especially if abuse has happened, if things have happened in our lives that we especially had no control over. And so often our family environments are like that. And so often we feel ashamed of who we are. And I think of this conversation that happened in the neighborhood of Make Believe on the show. It's a very famous episode. And it's this conversation that happens between Lady Aberlin and Daniel Tiger. And Daniel is just filled with doubt about the way he looks, about the way he talks, about the way he loves. He thinks he's a mistake, and he's very seemingly ashamed about that— things that he shouldn't have shame about. They are the person that he is. And Lady Aberlin is being this voice, and there's this conversation, and I'm not going to sing it or anything, but I do want to kind of share some of the words to the song that they are singing to each other. She says to him, "I think you are just fine exactly the way you are." And Daniel says, "The way I look?" And she replies, "Yes." Daniel says, "The way I talk?" And she says, "Yes." And Daniel says, "The way I love?" She says, "Especially that." Daniel says, "You don't think I'm a mistake?" And Lady Aberylin says, "You're the tiger I love most in this whole universe." And Daniel says, "Oh, Thanks, Lady Aberlin. I love you too. And all that is to say, if we're not careful, we can listen to those self-destructive voices that will shame us for no reason. And I think what Fred really tried to do— this one quote I'm going to share and then I'll go back to you— helps us to maybe connect to that person that we really are, that we've been created to be. He says, when I say it's you I like, I'm talking about that part of you that knows that life is far more than anything you can ever see or hear or touch. That deep part of you that allows you to stand for those things without which humankind cannot survive: love that conquers hate, peace that rises triumphant over war, and justice that proves more powerful than greed. So all that is to say I think you should not necessarily shame yourself, David. I think it's, it's a wonderful thing that you are seeing those good things in your children that are giving evidence in your life, um, that, that you have so much to be proud of. And, and I think maybe if all of us were able to hear the voice that reminds us how good we have been created and, and the people that we are, that we are worthy of love, and we are worthy of respect and those type of people. So I don't know if that's a help in that conversation or not, but I hope that we will seek out those healthy ways of confronting shame.

I certainly hope that too, and thank you for those kind and comforting words that you shared with me a few minutes ago. And I, you know, I feel very blessed that I am surrounded by a group of people that love me as I am. You know, we sometimes in our household, we will shout from one room to another. One person will call out, "I love everybody in this house!" And then everyone in the house that can hear that shouts back, "Everybody in this house loves you!" And we oftentimes will depart from one another using Mr. Rogers' secret code of 1-4-3. And that, you know, those are nice habits, but also when the rubber meets the road and we're really having a struggle with one another, learning to step back and slow down and quiet down and to really listen to another person in their moment of anger, realizing that sometimes mad is sad and sad is mad, that sometimes, especially for little children, those, those emotions become interchangeable. But for adults too, um, you know, learning those things are lessons that started when I was watching Mr. Rogers' Neighborhood, but they have continued and they take intention and they take all of the things that we've been talking about these last few weeks. They, they take, they take the kind of care and patience and kindness and joy. You know, you need to remember joy sometimes when you're in a very frustrating situation, that you are capable of feeling joy and that you have felt joy in the past and that you'll feel joy again. But it also brings us right down to where we are in this conversation to this notion of self-discipline, because sometimes anger can be a very powerful drug, and sometimes sadness can be a very powerful drug, and, and we can, we can get, we can get a taste of the power that we feel when someone else has to bend to our anger or to our sadness, and that can become a very unhealthy sort of cycle. And remembering that, you know, our, our pain is important, but also that our pain is not the only pain in the universe, but it should open us up to the pain of others as well. Like, those are all important lessons for everyone, whether we're children or whether we're adult— whether we're adults, to learn. And I, I'm on a daily walk with that, and I'm sure you are too with your family.

For sure.

I—

and, and David, I just want to say again, I appreciate so much these conversations that we have together and the way that you are, uh, so honest, uh, with things that you found struggles with, and I think those are actually so helpful for us because most of us struggle with those very things, and I appreciate that.

Well, thank you. I will say, for you and for the listeners, I lived for many decades of my life in dishonesty and trying to hide over these things and trying to pretend like they weren't there, and that didn't work. And so I'm, you know, on the back half of my life, I'm trying a different approach and seeing seeing what it would be like to be honest with my, my family, my kids, and with friends like you about the struggles that I have. And maybe there is some hope in that for someone else. But also, you know, it gives me a chance to not feel so alone, because when I do say things like this, oftentimes people will reach back and they'll say, you know, I'm going through that too. And that to me is an incredible comfort to realize that as strange as the past I have had has been I am not alone, and that also, no matter what, the past that I had has brought me to this point. And I will say, Rick, I like this point that I'm at in my life very much.

Well, I'm so glad that you found yourself there. You know, I think maybe as a way to close this segment of the show and our conversation together, how about one more quote from Fred Rogers that might be relevant to this?

Yes, please.

All right, this is one— actually, I just picked up this book, by the way. If anybody is looking for a good book, it's a brand new one. It's called Everything I Need to Know I Learned from Mr. Rogers' Neighborhood. And I think you can find it probably just about anywhere, but there's wonderful illustrations in the book. And this is just one that's really speaking to me this morning, and maybe all of us need to hear it together today. It's very important to look inside yourself and find that loving part of you. That's the, that's the part that you must take good care of and never be mean to, because that's the part of you that allows you to love your neighbor.

And your neighbor is anyone you happen to be with at any time in your life.

So, David, I'm glad that you're my neighbor, even though you're in Chicago. And I'm glad for these times that we have together each episode.

Well, Rick, I'm so thankful that you're my neighbor, and I'm thankful for all the neighbors that listen here on the show as well. Thanks for having me on again today.

In 1968, Fred Rogers wrote a song that asks some important questions. These are the lyrics: What do you do with the mad that you feel? When you feel so mad you could bite? When the whole wide world seems oh so wrong?, and nothing you do seems very right. What do you do? Do you punch a bag? Do you pound some clay or some dough? Do you round up friends for a game of tag or see how fast you go? It's great to be able to stop when you've planned a thing that's wrong and be able to do something else instead and think, this song. I can stop when I want to, can stop when I wish. I can stop, stop, stop anytime. And what a good feeling to feel like this and know that the feeling is really mine. Know that there's something deep inside that helps us become what we can, for a girl can be someday a woman, and a boy can be someday a man. Self-control was something that was very important to Fred Rogers. We've talked before on this podcast about how disciplined he was and how he cultivated a life that was joyful and peaceful and patient, kind, good, and faithful. And none of these attributes happened in the life of a person without self-control. One of the most challenging ways to practice self-control is when it comes to our anger. Anger is not a bad thing in itself. In fact, it can be a very good thing. Anger can tell us we need to take action and try to put something right. Anger can give us strength and energy and motivate us to act in important and just ways. But for some of us, anger can get out of control. And for some of us, anger can be the cause of serious problems in our relationships, in our work, and even with the law. Did you know that unresolved long-term anger Anger has been linked to health conditions such as high blood pressure and depression, anxiety, and even heart disease. Fred Rogers was very wise and spent a great deal of time talking about self-control because he knew it was important to deal with complex emotions like anger in a healthy way that doesn't harm you or anyone else. He often said that one of his most important messages messages was helping children find constructive ways to deal with their angry feelings. He wanted to help children and their parents understand that anger is natural and normal, but there are healthy things we can do when we're angry—things that don't hurt other people. Mr. Rogers said, "Human beings are not born with self-control." "We have to learn what to do with the mad that we feel. Learning to control ourselves is a long, hard process. It happens little by little. In fact, it is something we work on all through our lives." Everyone gets angry sometimes, and that was even true of Mr. Rogers. Usually, We get mad when we feel helpless or frustrated or left out. It's no surprise, then, that children get angry a lot, and they get angry with the people who are the closest to them. It's the people we like the most, family and friends, who can often make us feel the gladdest and maddest, because love and anger are often intertwined. When young children get angry, sometimes they hit or bite or kick. That doesn't mean they're bad for doing so. It's just one of the only ways they know to show that they're feeling mad. This is especially true before they have the words to tell us how they feel. Think with me for a moment. Have you ever thought about how tight and tense you get when you're feeling angry or worried or upset. This happens to adults and children both. This is because tied up with our feelings is a lot of physical energy. It's important that children have healthy outlets to release some of that physical energy that is bound up inside. This is also important for adults. There are many ways that are healthy to deal with our anger that are positive. But because many grown-ups didn't learn these healthy ways of coping, we have a lot of unhealthy anger problems in our society today. Fred Rogers, in encouraging children to deal positively with their angry feelings, would tell them to use words and say, "I'm mad," or "Stop that." He would also encourage them to express their angry feelings in their play by having them knock over their own building blocks, draw an angry picture, or bang an angry song out on an instrument like a piano or a xylophone. There are many ways to express our anger that teach children self-control. Music, painting, working with clay, and physical activities are ways that are used to help children learn how to handle anger in healthy ways. The same principles can be applied to adults too. What do you and I do with the mad that we feel? Have we learned enough self-control to handle our anger in healthy ways? There certainly is a lot of evidence convinced that many grown-ups have not learned healthy ways to deal with their anger. Now, I am not a psychologist or a counselor, so I'm not claiming to be, but I've read enough to know that anger is expressed and manifested in one of four ways. Three of these ways—aggressive, passive-aggressive, and suppressive—are are unhealthy ways of dealing with anger. Assertive is the only healthy expression of anger. Let's break those down. An aggressive response to anger isn't healthy because it will come out in unhelpful ways, like getting louder when getting angry, or having an outburst that is not proportional to the event that triggered it. Aggressive responders might throw things when they are angry, be physically intimidating, or even hit during a disagreement. Aggressive responders also tend to overlook the feelings of others and can respond to others with quick and hurtful rebuttals. None of these things are healthy responses. Now let's look at passive aggression. Passive aggression also isn't healthy because it can cut off communication with others. People who tend to be passive-aggressive know that being silent during an argument will irritate others, so they will just become silent and start to sulk or pout. This can also lead to dishonesty, as a person will lie and say everything is fine, even when it isn't. Passive-aggressive responders tend to complain complain about others behind their backs and blame others for their own mistakes. Again, none of these things are healthy. And then there are those who will be more suppressive when it comes to their anger. Suppressive responders don't like others to know their personal problems, so even when things are falling apart, they will pretend like they have it all together, being very reserved about sharing problems. They won't admit to being angry and won't mention when others have said something upsetting to them. This can lead to depression and moodiness, and people who respond in suppressive ways will often wonder if their opinions are valid, so they will avoid confrontation, they'll become resentful, and they'll develop health problems like headaches, sleep problems, and stomach disorders. One of the worst things about all three of these unhealthy responses is that aggressive, passive-aggressive, and suppressive manifestations tend to hurt our relationships with others, building walls instead of bridges, blocking others out instead of welcoming them into our lives. By contrast, self-controlled, assertive responses to anger can be quite healthy and can even draw people closer together in the end. People who learn self-control and respond to angry feelings assertively learn not to blame others when they become frustrated. These people don't respond with threatening and intimidating remarks toward others. Healthy, assertive, self-controlled people will seek to resolve conflicts conflicts mutually and can approach sensitive subjects without insisting on being right, even accepting responsibility for making mistakes. These people will be more willing to forgive others' past mistakes, confronting others with kindness and gentleness. An assertive person will listen to others without becoming angry and will be respectful. Valuing different opinions. Assertive people learn a neutral posture, not threatening others, but not retreating either. Learning this type of self-control will help a person to handle anger and conflict in healthy ways that actually help relationships. It is not easy to become a self-controlled person. And that's why we need to encourage it in children, to learn self-control in their youth. Fred Rogers encouraged children to have healthy ways of practicing self-control by playing games like red light, green light, or stringing beads, or moving toy cars along a road made from pieces of masking tape. Fred Rogers also taught that when our children are about to hit but they hold back, that it's an important time for us to say something like, "I'm proud of you. You wanted to hit, but you stopped yourself. Look how well you're growing." It's important to praise our children for small moments of control, like when they're trying something difficult or when they're taking turns or waiting. It's also very important to try and help our children calm down. This can be challenging, and we might have to try a number of different things to find out what will work for each child, and these things will change as our children grow older. Maybe one of the hardest things for us as grown-ups is staying calm while being firm. Sometimes when our children get angry, we grown-ups get angry too. The problem with this is that it doesn't help the child to calm down. It makes them even more upset. But if we are able to maintain our calmness while remaining firm, our children will likely be able to get their self-control back more quickly. Those of you who grew up in the neighborhood know how important important music was to Fred Rogers and how he would always use music as a way not only to express happiness and joy, but he also taught us how to use it as a way of practicing self-control. Let's listen in to a segment from Mr. Rogers' Neighborhood. By the way, after this clip, I have a very special surprise for our listeners. So make sure and listen all the way to the end. Let's listen in now to Fred Rogers.

I guess you know that I really love music. In fact, it's been very, very important to me since I was very little. My mom and dad didn't like me to bang when I was angry, but I found that if I played the piano when I was angry, they didn't mind that. So that's what I did. I'd play like that. And then little by little, I'd see that the music would be sounding less and less angry. So it seemed that the more I played, the more anger got out of me, and I felt better about everything. That's one reason I wrote that song Good Feeling, because it does give you a good feeling to know that there's something that you can do to help you become the master of the mad that you feel and not have to hurt yourself or anybody else. I hope that you're finding your ways of saying how you feel, ways that don't hurt you or anybody else. Really help people to have very good feelings.

Music was a very special tool that Fred Rogers used to help express so many things. In all the interest that has recently been generated in Mr. Rogers over the past couple of years, people have been rediscovering the music that he wrote. Recently, our good friends at ThankYouMrRogers.com have produced a new album of the songs of Fred Rogers called "Thank You, Mr. Rogers: Music and Memories." The album pays tribute to Fred's musical legacy from a host of top talent who have put their own spins on Fred's timeless songs. The album includes performances by Jackie Velázquez, Kelly Pickler, Lee Greenwood, John Secada, Sandy Patty, Vanessa Williams, Tom Bergeron, Jim Brickman, and more. At the conclusion of our show today, courtesy of our good neighbors who produce Thank You, Mr. Rogers! Music and Memories, we are going to play Fred's song, Perfectly Beautiful Day, performed by Micky Dolenz of The Monkees. Just before we do that, I also want to let you know that Thank You, Mr. Rogers! is much more than just an album. In fact, thankyoumisterrogers.com is encouraging Mister Rogers fans around the country to contact their local representatives to instate a Thank You, Mister Rogers Day in as many states as possible. When you visit the website thankyoumisterrogers.com, you can click on the tab that says Mister Rogers Month, and there you will find an easy link where you can write your local representatives to be part of the movement. ThankYouMrRogers.com also wants to hear from you with your favorite Mister Rogers memories. I am so happy to be able to partner with Thank You Mister Rogers, not only for this wonderful album, but because of the many fine ways they are helping to carry on the legacy of kindness that Fred Rogers left behind. So please visit thankyoumisterrogers.com and become a part of this wonderful movement. Let's all have a Fred Rogers Day in all of our states this year. Let's listen now to Mickey Dolan singing Fred Rogers' song, Perfectly Beautiful Day.

Perfectly beautiful, perfectly beautiful, perfectly beautiful day. It's a perfectly beautiful day for playing. A perfectly beautiful day for saying hello. You're welcome here. It's a perfectly beautiful day. It's a perfectly beautiful day for playing. A perfectly beautiful day for Stay inside or outside. Here it's a perfectly beautiful day, especially when friends like you, like you, come visiting. Friends like you who make us feel so special. Certain things start happening when you're visiting. When we're together, we're certain to say, "Hello there!" It's a perfectly beautiful day for playing, a perfectly beautiful day for saying hello. You're welcome here, it's a perfectly beautiful, perfect beautiful. It's a perfectly beautiful, perfectly beautiful day. A beautiful day. Such a beautiful day. It's a perfectly beautiful, perfectly Perfectly beautiful, perfectly beautiful, perfectly beautiful, perfectly beautiful. Jane! Oh, come out and play! Hey, hey!

Thank you for joining us here this week in the neighborhood. Music featured on the podcast was Nouvelle Noel by Kevin MacLeod, and all other music by Benjamin Tossett at bensound.com. Special thanks to my guest David Dalt and the Atmosphere Art What You Say community on Twitter. I'm your host, Rick Lee James. My Twitter account is @RickLeeJames. My website is RickLeeJames.com. My other podcast is Voices in My Head: The Rick Lee James Podcast. And I look forward to being with you again next time. Until then, remember, you make each day a special day. You know how? You know, by just your being you. There's only one person in this whole world like you, and people can like you exactly as you are.