6 Ways To Build Your Confidence

The Mindset Mentor is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Do you find yourself playing the budgeting game? Well, with the name your price tool from Progressive, you can find options that

fit your budget and potentially lower your bills.

Try it@progressive.com, progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates.

Price and coverage match limited by state law.

Not available in all states for small businesses, every hire matters, but time and resources are limited. LinkedIn Hiring Pro is built for that reality, helping you find, connect with and screen the right candidates faster. From drafting jobs to AI powered screening interviews in a conversational interface that lets you describe what you need in plain language, you can spend less time searching and more time connecting with qualified talent.

Hire right the first time. Post your first job and get $100

off towards your job post@LinkedIn.com dial that's LinkedIn.com dial terms and conditions apply.

ADP knows anything can change the world of work. Like what if a blocked shipping port caused a worldwide coffee shortage? Suddenly, businesses are scrambling to manage an increasingly drowsy workforce. Productivity slips 20% just due to the extended time it takes to conduct a job interview while yawning. Anything can change the world of work. From HR to payroll, ADP helps businesses take on the next anything ADP always designing for.

Welcome to today's episode of the Mindset Mentor podcast. I'm your host Rob Dial. If you have not yet done so, hit that subscribe button so you never miss another podcast episode. And if you want to receive inspirational text messages from me and you live in the United States or Canada, text me right now. 512-580-9305. Once again, 512-580-9305 and I will sporadically send you messages throughout the week. Today we're going to be talking about six different ways to build your confidence. And when I say build your confidence, I think that I use that phrase very specifically. And the reason why is because I see confidence as something that is built. Seems like almost everybody wants more confidence, but you're not born with confidence in any sort of way. Confidence is something that you earn. You can't sit on the couch, scroll on Instagram and watch Netflix all day and magically just be given confidence. Confidence is something that you have to go out and earn, and confidence comes from going in a lot of different ways but doing things. Whether you do something and you didn't really want to do it and you fail massively, you still get confidence from that if you look at it the right way. If you look at the fail and you say, oh, my gosh, I failed. You're not going to get much confidence from it. But if you look at it and you say, you know what, maybe I didn't get the results that I wanted, but I did do the thing that I was afraid of, and I'm proud of myself for that, that can build your confidence. So when you really start to look at it, confidence can come from that. But also, a lot of times, confidence can just come from just taking the action. Sometimes it comes from results. Like, a lot of times people think, like, well, like, I've never graduated college and I've never won any awards, and I've never spoken on stage and I've never done anything, but I've never had results that should make me confident. It can come from results, but it doesn't always have to come from results. When you see a confident person, you're seeing someone who has either gotten results by doing something or they've been out of their comfort zone over and over and over again, and they're starting to be more confident in themselves because they trust themselves to do what needs to be done regardless of how they feel. And so people are not born with confidence. The way I like to see confidence, for some reason, it always pops up in my head this way. But the way that I see confidence is like Jenga blocks. Every time you do something, either, you know, you go out and you do get great results, you get a confidence block, or you go and you do something that you didn't want to do, even if you fail, you still get a little confidence block. If you say, you know what, I'm proud of myself for doing what I didn't want to do, or you decide, you know what, I'm going to go, I'm going to do a workout today, and I don't have a whole lot of time, but I'm going to do it. And you show up for yourself and you get a little confidence block. And when you say, you know what, I'm going to do a cold plunge, and I don't want to do a fricking cold plunge today, and you do it anyways, you get a little confidence block. And so that's kind of the way that I see it in my mind. But today we're going to go through six different ways to help you build exactly like I'm saying, with the confidence blocks, with the Jenga, build your confidence. Number one, first one is to take action. You cannot think your way into confidence. Let me just say that again. You cannot think your way into comp. You can't just sit there and say, you know, I'm the most confident person in the world. No, it's not going to work that way. Confidence comes from doing what you don't want to do, or it comes from results in some way. It comes from doing something and seeing that you did that thing. Like I've been saying. It also comes from doing something and being like, you know what? Yeah, I royally screwed that up, but I'm really proud of myself that I did it or a lot of times. What I see with people is a lot of people, we hold ourselves back and we think too much, and then we do something, and we do it way better than we thought we were going to do it. That will give you a lot of confidence. So the first thing you have to do is you have to start taking action, become good at following through, doing what you say you're going to do. Not just doing it because other people know about it, but doing what you say you're going to do for yourself, doing what you said you were going to do and prioritizing yourself. And so, like, a lot of times, I see that people want accountability, partners and lots of things that they do because they don't want to look like an ass when they don't do what they said they were going to do. Yeah, okay, I get that you could definitely do it, but no matter what, there's always one person that's listening to you and that's you. And how many times you said you're going to do something and then you didn't follow through? Well, of course your confidence is going to be low from that because you're saying to yourself, oh, I want to go do this thing, and immediately your brain's going to.

Yeah.

Do you remember how many times you've given up on yourself in the past, though? There's one person that's always paying attention to yourself, and it's you. And so you have to get really good at taking the action that you say you're gonna take. So that's the first thing. The second thing that I want you to think about is visualization might sound corny, might sound cliche, even when I talk about visualization, even though I've been doing it for years. Like, the very first time I ever did visualization was when I was 13 years old, and I wrote about this in my book Level Up. And I remember I was really nervous before my championship basketball game. I was the best player on my basketball team, and I was in the championship Game the next day with my really good friend Eddie. And he was the best person on his basketball team, but he was way better than I was. And I remember I was telling my mom, she's like, are you excited for the game tomorrow? And I was like, I'm actually really nervous. And she's like, you know what you should do? You should go and you should actually visualize the game. And I was like, what does that mean? I was 13 years old. She's like, go in and visualize how you want the game to go. Visualize walking into the court. Visualize the warmups. Visualize how you want the game to go. Everything. I was like, okay. And so I did it and I went in, I visualized. I still remember I visualized on the floor of my bathroom when I was 13. And it was crazy because I was really nervous thinking about the day before. But then I visualized it. And because I had already visualized it when I went to the actual game the next day, because I felt like I'd already been there because I'd already visualized it, I was way more confident now. Did we lose? Yes. We still got our asses handed to us. We lost the game. But I was way more confident going into that game having visualized the how I wanted it to go. And so sometimes if you're not confident with something, it's if the more that you can get repetition around something. So like for me, I was, for years I was not good and not confident at public speaking. But I just kept doing it over and over and over and over and over again. And now it's just normal to me. Cause I've probably got about 25,000 hours of public speaking at this point in time. And so for me it's. I'm way more confident just from the repetition. And so how do we get repetition if we're not actually on stage all the time?

Teachers are deep into new units this time of year. IXL lets kids practice the exact skills they're learning in class, helping lessons stick and boosting confidence. Heading toward the spring. IXL is an award winning online learning platform that helps kids truly understand what they're learning. Whether they're building math confidence, strengthening reading and writing skills, or reviewing science concepts. It covers math, language arts, science and social studies from Pre K through 12th grade with personalized interactive content that adapts to the child's level and PACE. IXL is used in 96 of the top 100 school districts in the United States. It's an easy way to support learning as the school year moves into its most important stretch. Make an impact on your child's learning and get IXL now and the Mindset Mentor listeners can get an exclusive 20% off IXL membership when they sign up at ixl.com mindsetmentor visit ixl.com mindsetmentOr to get the most effective learning program out there at the best price. Stop paying way too much for wireless just because that's how it's always been. Mint Mobile exists purely to fix that Same coverage, same speed, just without the inflated price tag. The premium wireless you expect unlimited talk, text and data, but at a fraction of what others charge.

I've been using Mint Mobile for about

four years now for my business phone and and it works just as good as all of the carriers that I've ever had. Are you ready to stop paying more? For what? Ready to stop paying more than what you have to? New customers can make the switch today and for a limited time get unlimited premium wireless for just $15 per month. Switch now@mintmobile.com mentor that's mintmobile.com mentor upfront payment of $45 for three months, $90 for six months or $180 for 12 month plan $15 per month equivalent taxes and fees Extra initial plan term only over 50 gigabytes may slow when network is busy Capable device required availability speed and coverage varies. Additional terms apply. C mintmobile.com Every business is asking the same question.

How do we make AI work? For us, the possibilities are endless and the guessing is too risky. But sitting on the sidelines is not an option because one thing is almost certain. Your competitors are already making their movement. No more waiting. With NetSuite by Oracle, you can put AI to work. Today, NetSuite is the number one AI Cloud ERP trusted by over 43,000 businesses. It is a unified suite that brings you financials, inventory, commerce, HR and CRM into one single source of truth. Now with NetSuite AI connector, you can use AI of your choice to connect your actual business data and ask every question you ever had, from key customers to inventory trends. Plus automate those tiresome manual processes. Let's see your competitors try to do that right now. Get their free business guide demystifying AI at netsuite.com dial the guide is free to you at netsuite.com dial that's netsuite.com

dial

well, what do you do? You visualize it, whatever it is that you're nervous about or you want to be more confident in. Can you visualize it over and over and over again. Because your brain does not know the difference between something that you're visualizing and something that you're actually doing. And so if you want to get more confident in something, just try to start visualizing the way that you want it to go over and over and over again. See the person that you want to be. See yourself giving that presentation at work and crushing it. And your boss coming up to you and saying, oh my gosh, Stacey, that was amazing. You did such a good job. See yourself as a confident person. Most people unintentionally visualize and everything that they don't want, and then they're curious

why they're so afraid to take action.

It's because you're visualizing in your head everything that you don't want most of the time. And so you can use visualization to help you do this as well. That's number two. Third thing that'll help you out is using affirmations. Now, when I say use affirmations, I don't mean sit there and close your eyes and say, I'm confident, I'm confident, I'm confident, I'm confident, I'm confident. When I say affirmations, I mean talk better to yourself. Talk better to yourself. I want you to think of it that way. Think of the worst person in your life. Like, think of the person who's been the most of a pain in the ass in your entire life. There's a really good chance that you have talked worse to yourself than they have talked to you. There's a pretty good chance that you are worse to yourself than they are to you. And so when you talk with affirmations, it doesn't mean just, hey, I'm gonna just lie to myself. What it means is actually paying attention to the story and the narrative that's going on in your head all the time and start noticing and really being aware of what it is that you are saying to yourself. It's really mind boggling to me to see how many people just are not really aware of the way they speak to themselves. And then when they become aware, they're like, holy shit, I am not nice to myself. And so really what it comes down to is start to affirm the way that you want to think about yourself and affirm the way that you want the world to be and start talking to yourself better. So if you notice yourself, talk down to yourself, immediately become self aware of it and say, oh, I just noticed myself doing this. What I'm gonna do now is I'm Gonna say three positive things. If I notice one way that I don't want to think, then I'm going to change it by saying three things that I do want to think immediately. And to make sure that I pay attention to that and to also notice that, you know, I can say affirmations.

And an affirmation is just the way

that we speak to ourself. But another way to do an affirmation is something called an incantation, which is basically the easiest way I think of it is like a affirmation with power, with more energy behind it. And like, if you think about the scariest moment of your life, the scariest moment of your life is usually charged with a lot of emotion. And so you have one big event that happens in your life, and it's charged with a lot of emotion. So if we want these affirmations to be more powerful, we need to charge them with a lot of emotion with incantations, which is, you know, if you're starting to think to yourself, like, oh, I'm weak, or something like that, well, then when you go to the gym, let's say you have a. You go for a run, right? And you just start saying to yourself, I'm strong, I'm strong, I'm strong. And you're saying it with power, with emotion, while you're on the run. And you're actually starting to reprogram the way that you speak to yourself, and

so start to pay attention much more

to the way that you speak to yourself. That's number three. Number four is to fail. Just fail. And realize that when you fail and fail, like I'm talking about, like, fall on your face. Because success and failure are not the opposite. Success and failure are just different spectrums, different ends of a spectrum. It's like one coin. You. You have heads and you have tails. You can't have heads without having tails. We can't have success without having failure. They're the opposite sides of the same coin. They're on a spectrum. One's on one side, the other's on the other. Success is 99% failure. Fall on your face and realize that failure will not kill you. Once you see that failure will not kill you, you won't fear it as much. It's not really a big deal. People who I have found that are extremely successful want to fail in a new endeavor as fast as possible because they want to get it out of the way. People I see who are unsuccessful try to avoid failure. And so, you know, fall on your face, then pick yourself up and keep on going. Because even failing and then picking yourself and continue to keep going builds confidence. Because you're saying, you know what? I'm getting up and I'm doing this for myself. I'm proud of myself for doing that. That builds a lot of confidence. The feeling of, I'm not willing to give up on myself will build confidence. A confident person is not born that way. A confident person has built people. How do you build yourself?

Do it.

Do what you don't want to do. Fail. Screw it up. Get up and keep going. And remind yourself, look at me. Look at what I'm doing. Look at what I'm doing for myself. So that's number four. Number five is say yes to more things out of your comfort zone. Start to seek discomfort when you would normally say no, say yes. Try that out for a little while. A lot of times you're like, no, I don't really feel like going out to that networking event. Whenever you feel that moment come up, go, yes, I'll go.

Shit.

All right, now I gotta go to it. I already agreed to it. And when you start to do this, you start to seek things that are out of your comfort zone once again. Just like failure, you realize it's not gonna kill you, but you're doing something you've never done before. Remind yourself how awesome that is. Remind yourself that you're growing reminders. Like, another way to think about it is all too often, we're looking out of the. The windshield, the front in front of us, where we want to go, what we want to do. Not too often enough, do we actually look in the rearview mirror and be like, oh, my God, look at how far I've come. If you would take more time to stop and think about how far you've come and what you've done and what you've overcome and how strong you are. Like, one of the things I said a few episodes ago is, like, any woman who's ever had. Who's ever given birth should just remind themselves of that and realize that nothing is harder than that. Like, just remind yourself, I'm a badass. I've given birth to three children. I can build a fucking business. I got this. Like, remind yourself of how much of a badass you are and just keep on reminding yourself of these things, because all too often we look at, you know, where we aren't and where we're not. You know, oh, my gosh, I want to be here, but I'm not there yet. But a lot of times you don't look in the rearview mirror and be like, oh, my God. Look at all the things that I've overcome. Look at all the ways that I've. These crazy. I had this really hard thing that happened to me that I overcame, and I had this death that happened, and I had this divorce that happened, and I had this. That happened. I overcame it. You know what? I'm a lot stronger than I think I am. And just start reminding yourself of those things. And then, number six, you just got to do what you don't want to do. You do build confidence by just doing what it is that you don't want to do. You got to get in. You know, you got to get in cold water sometimes. I was just in Sedona last week, and, you know, they have a creek that flows through Sedona, and it's cold. It was like, 40 degrees. And I was sitting there, and I knew I wanted to do it, and I was sitting there, and I was breathing. And as I'm doing it, that little voice pops up inside of my head, and it's like, no, no, no. Don't do it. You know, it was funny because I jumped out of the car, told Lauren I was gonna go and jump inside of the water. And there was literally the voice inside of my head was going, you know, if you come back and you're not wet, Lauren will understand. She'll be like, yeah, it is really cold. I completely get it. Like, Lauren wouldn't be like, oh, you're a little bitch. Why didn't you jump in the water? So I even had this voice in my head that was just like, lauren would understand. And I was like, no, fuck you. I'm gonna be doing it anyways. And so I had the voice keep coming in. I didn't want to do it. I didn't want to jump in the water, but I did want to jump in the water. I didn't want to. I didn't want to jump in the water because of how it feels. I did want to jump in the water based off of how I'm going to feel after I get out of the water and all of the energy that I'm going to have, but also the sense of confidence of, you did it and you didn't want to do it. When you keep doing stuff like that is when you start to build confidence. You know, you wake up and you're like, I'm tired. I don't want to get this workout in. But you do it anyways. That's when you start to build confidence. When you hear the alarm go off in the morning, and you normally would hit the snooze, and you decide to get up and do what you don't want to do. That's when you start to build confidence. And so you got to start seeking opportunities to do things that you don't want to do. Because every time that you take just a little bit of a step outside of your comfort zone and you do a little bit of the things that you don't want to do, you build a little bit more confidence, a little bit more confidence, a little bit more confidence, and you won't wake up tomorrow and be a completely different person. That's completely confident. But if you keep expanding yourself out of your comfort zone just a little bit every single day, you. You notice in a year, you're way more confident than you were. You notice in two years, five years, you're way more confident than you were. I've seen people that go through 30 days of just concentrating on growing themselves, and the end of those 30 days, they're way more confident just because of a consistent pushing themself out of their comfort zone. The way I like to think of a comfort zone, I've said this before in the podcast, is like a rubber band, right? When you have a rubber band, if you pull it just a little bit, it won't break. But if you pull it and get it to its peak of where it can go, it'll really try to force you back to normal. It'll really try to pull you back in. But if you pull, pull, pull, pull, pull long enough, eventually it snaps. That's what you're trying to do with your comfort zone. You're trying to just expand it a little bit more, a little bit more, a little bit more, a little bit more. And eventually you snap that comfort zone, and you never go back to the same person you were before. I always say it, the mind is like a plastic bag, not an elastic bag. And when it's plastic bag, if you pull it, it never goes back to the same size that it was before. That's what you're trying to do. You're trying to break the word brain. You're trying to break the bag. You're trying to expand yourself past what you're comfortable doing now. And if you just seek this discomfort, seek to do things a little bit further outside of your comfort zone every single day, you'll look back in a year and you'll be a completely different person. So that's what I got for you for today's episode. If you love this episode, please share it on your Instagram stories and tag me obdialjr. R O B D I A L J R and if you're the type of person who is looking to grow themself and you know right now that nothing will change unless you change, your 2024 will not be better than 2023 unless you change and you make it better. I'm running a 30 day challenge throughout the January throughout the course of January. It's called level up 30, where over the course of 30 days I'm gonna be coaching you every single weekday on a group coaching format with everybody else who's going through the challenge. And we're gonna be pushing ourselves, hitting 60 different pillars every single day for 30 days straight to break ourself out of our comfort zone and to grow ourself into a better version of ourself. If you're interested in learning more about it, you can go to levelup30.com so levelup30 com there's a video that explains everything. You can look at testimonies from over 5,000 people that have gone through these challenges in the past. Check it out and see if it's right for you. Once again, it is levelup30.com and with that, I'm going to leave you the same way I leave you every single episode. Make it your mission to make somebody else's day better. I appreciate you and I hope that you have an amazing day.

Bubba Wallace here with Tyler Rev. You know what's more nerve wracking than waiting for qualifying results?

Waiting for the green flag to drop.

Instead of pacing, you rev up with Chumba Casino's weekly new releases.

It's like a fresh set of tires for your brain.

Play for free@shambacasino.com let's Chumba.

No purchase necessary. BGW Group void where prohibited by law. CTNC's 21+ sponsored by Jumba Casino.