90 Days to Change Your Life
15 Oct 2025 · 1 min
Rob Dial walks through reshaping your life in 90 days by writing a detailed portrait of your ideal self (your North Star), then using it to cut distractions and say no to everything else. He argues real change is identity, not habits, and starts with micro-wins like making your bed each morning.
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Welcome to today's episode of the Mindset Mentor podcast. I'm your host, Rob Dial. If you have not yet done so, hit that subscribe button so you don't miss any more podcast episodes. And if you're out there and you love this podcast, send me a text message right now. 512-580-9305. Once again, 512-580-9305. Today we're going to be talking about how to change your life in the next 90 days. Everything in your life could look different 90 days from today. Your energy, your mindset, your confidence, your bank account, your relationships and your body. But only if you make the conscious decision to stop playing small, stop being the person that you've always been, and to start acting like your dreams actually matter. You've been talking about this for a long time, haven't you? About changing your life. Well, the next 90 days, if you become serious, is your window to actually become different. No more planning, no more build up, no more excuses. Just you and your goals for the next 90 days. The next 90 days is about you disappearing and focusing on changing your life. But we have to be really real with each other. Maybe so far this year it hasn't gone the way that you wanted it to. Maybe you had really big goals in January and you forgot about them. Or maybe you got distracted in some sort of way. Hey, maybe this was one of the years where life punched you in the face and maybe it didn't. Maybe you just went into old decisions and habits and you woke up six months later and you're like, wow, what the hell have I been doing the past six months of this year? Maybe you hid behind fear. Maybe you've been delaying. Maybe you've been avoiding. Cool. Welcome to being a human. We all do that. We will always take the path of least resistance. Your brain is designed to keep you safe. It is always 20 steps ahead of you, throwing out traps to keep you to stay in the exact same place, to keep you in your comfort zone. That's what your brain is really good at doing. You have to consciously wake up every single day and choose differently than you ever have in the past. Because this is the move that most people miss. Whatever's happened so far this year, it doesn't matter. It's not a death sentence for you. You can use it as data so that the next 90 days you can go all in on what you need to do. You're not behind, you're just learning what doesn't work. You don't need to guilt yourself or shame yourself or any of that. You and your future need to matter more than you've been actually giving it. And so let's zoom out real quick and really talk about how to make changes in your life and to make real long term changes in your life. Because for me, when I was younger and I first got into self development over 20 years ago, at this point I was just trying to do more things and to try to change my life. But really what this is about, this is about who you're becoming. This is about you building yourself into a different person. And whether you realize it or not, you are building yourself every single day. You're building yourself with every single thought that you have and with every single action that you take. It's like James Clear always says, every action that you take is a vote for the person that you want to become. Think about that next time you're deciding what action to take. Do I want to stay the same person that I've always been or do I want to make a different decision, a different action for so that I can start building myself into somebody different? You're either building yourself in the person that you want to be, or you're building your Old identity even stronger. So I want to ask you a very simple but maybe a little bit uncomfortable question to think about. Who do you want to be 90 days from today? If you woke up, boom, and you were just 90 days from today, you could turn the fear off. Like, there's a switch on the side of your head. You could just turn off fear, you could turn off limiting beliefs, you could turn off all of your old stories, and you could just take action from the place that you want to be. Who could you be 90 days from today? Not how much do you want to accomplish, not how much money do you want to make, not how much weight do you want to lose. Those are really, really important. But to go even deeper, who do you want to be? Like, you're not just building a plan, you're building a person. You realize that you've been building yourself your entire life. It's just most of the time, you've been doing it unconsciously. So if you had to take a pen and paper, which if you're at home and you're sitting with a pen and paper where you don't have one in front of you, go run and get one real quick. Write down who you want to become. Like, describe the person in detail who can easily accomplish everything that you want in your future. Not someone that's going to have to struggle. I'm talking, like, easily accomplished. What do they do? Describe them in as much detail as possible. Are they strong? Are they focused? Are they respected? Are they confident? Are they peaceful? Do they take action no matter what they feel like? Do they follow through with every single thing that they say they're going to do? Do they not give up on themselves? Do they not give up on the people that they love? Describe that person as if you're trying to be the most descriptive you've ever been in describing a person. What's that person look like? And then what would that version of you do every single day? Like, if that person was planted into your day today, what would they do differently than what you do? That's what you need to start focusing on. What would that perfect version of me do that could easily accomplish what I want? What would they be doing today? And what you do is you use that person as your North Star. Every decision that you make is either a yes or a no based off of if it aligns with who you're trying to become. If it aligns with who you're trying to become, it's an easy yes. If it doesn't align with who you're trying to become it is an easy no. And you use that person as your North Star. You know, when your alarm goes off tomorrow morning and you're thinking about hitting that alarm, you just use that person as your North Star. Would that version of me that can easily accomplish everything that I want in my future, Would that version of me sleep in right now? Would that version of me skip the gym just because they had a long day? Would that version of me talk to myself the way that I talk to myself? Would that version of me be okay with me just living a life where I feel like I'm getting a bye? How would that version of me talk to their wife? How. How would that version of me talk to their children? How would that version of me talk to their employees? And you write that down. You write down as much information as you possibly can, because that is your roadmap. And so instead of having to build this big elaborate plan like people always like to do, and for you people that plan to plan, to plan to plan, and you get ready to get ready, get ready to get ready, get rid of all that shit, right? Write down who you need to become, write down what you would do, and then use that person as your roadmap. Becoming that person needs to become your new obsession. Nothing else. You understand that if you have a family, if you have children, if you have a spouse, if you have brothers, sisters, mother, father, you becoming that person is not selfish, because you becoming that person is going to change all of their lives as well. Not only in the way you interact with them, but how much better your life can be with you accomplishing more, with you being more, with you making more money with the options that it could afford you in your life. You can build yourself into anyone that you want. That's the coolest part about being a human. That's the thing that I think is amazing about being a human. You can build yourself into anyone that you want with the right thoughts and the right actions. But you've got to be consciously paying attention and intentional with as many moments as you possibly can in your day. Not going back into old habitual patterns, but to consciously go, hmm, normally I would do X, but the perfect version of me would do Y. I'm going to do Y instead. And you've got to put all of this on paper. You've got to make the plan of, who is this person? What do they do? What do they like? And how can I step into being that person? And we will be right back. Teachers are deep into new units. This time of year, IXL lets kids practice the exact skills they're learning in class, helping lessons stick and boosting confidence. 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One of the most important things that you can do to change your life is to change your environment. When I was writing my book Level Up, I did a ton of research on really successful people, like the type of people who took ridiculous amounts of action compared to the average person. And I realized that the people who have the most success, like, they weren't born with confidence, they weren't born with willpower. What they have actually done is they have built their environment to not test their willpower. So it's not that they have better willpower than you. It's that they've built an entire environment where they cannot test their willpower. And so you need to figure out what in your environment is pushing you forward in life, whether that be a physical object, whether that be a physical person, which ones, like, what in your environment is pushing you forward and making you better. And then what is holding you back? It could be internal, and it can also be external as well. And then cut all of the crap that's draining you. You know, if you say I spend too much time on my phone, okay, how can I make sure that my phone is away from me as much as I possibly can throughout the day? I'm going to go downstairs. When I work from home, I'm going to put my phone in the drawer inside of my kitchen. It's going to be really hard next time I want to grab my phone if it's that far away from me. You know what? I spend too much time. I spend, whatever, three hours a night watching Netflix. Okay, we'll delete Netflix, get rid of your subscription, or if that's too much for you, take your TV off the wall for the next 90 days. It's really hard to watch TV when you don't have a TV on the wall. Maybe you want to read more. Okay, well, how can you change your environment to support that? Maybe there's certain things that you need to learn over the next 90 days to make you better. Okay, well, then I'm going To put those books on my coffee table. So when I would normally sit down and watch Netflix, that TV's in another room, but the books are in front of me. I might as well actually start to read those books. And so over the next 90 days, you want to go all in. And here's what you have to do is you have to ruthlessly eliminate your distractions, your environment. Like Instagram, unless you use it for business. Take it off your phone. You know, if it's you, you don't use it. Or it's only for work, or you have two phones. Right. Netflix. Nope. Notifications on your phone and on your computer, off every single ping, ping, Every single one of them pulls you out of your zone and straight into someone else's agenda. Every energy draining conversation or energy draining people, gone. Listen, the next 90 days, it's not about getting rid of all of your joy. It's about finally getting honest with yourself and about how much time and energy that you're leaking in your life and how much is actually costing you in your life as well. All too often I hear people have the excuse of like, oh, I don't have enough time. That's complete bs. No, you're probably just not really focused on making sure that you are as productive as possible in your time. The next 90 days, you want your full focus. You want to be fully productive in what you need to get done. Not your partial effort, none of that stuff. You want to be fully in it. You could do, you could do anything for 90 days. Do you get that? It's only 90 days. I'm not saying the rest of your life, you could do anything for 90 days to try to make a big change in your life. You don't need more motivation. You don't need any more knowledge. What you need is you need less noise. So you got to be like brutally ruthless with your time. But you know, your dreams, your future of your life and your family's life deserves a ruthless version of you. So get better at saying no, especially if you're a people pleaser. Get better at saying no. If it doesn't align with your North Star, the answer is no. No questions. Don't need to think about it after. No. Okay, gotta go. All right. Now the next thing that's really important that you need to start looking at is the excuses that you've been giving yourself. I get it. I was like a professional excuse giver when I was younger and when I was first getting into sales and trying to grow my business and trying to grow My life, I was so good at excuses. And then I had a one on one that called me out of my excuses. And he's like, your excuses are bullshit. I don't care about them. Get it done. And I was like, oh, man. Someone that's actually going to hold me to what I say I'm going to do, right? And so I get it. They sound logical, they feel valid, these excuses, right? They're dressed up like they're actual facts, but all of them are lies. They're just these sneaky little lies that your old identity uses just to stay in control. So, like, I'll give you a couple of examples that kind of pop into my head. Like, first one is, I don't have time. So many people say this. Okay, if you think that you don't have time, I want you to try this for me. Repeat this out loud with me. Just say it right after I do. I don't have time to become the person that I want to be. Okay, next one. I don't have time to create a great life. Okay, and last one. I'm too busy to make my life and my family's life better. Like, if you say it out loud, it sounds ridiculous, right? So it's not that you lack time. What it really comes down to is that you lack boundaries, you lack focus. It's the courage to say no to things that don't matter. You don't need an extra five hours a day to change your life. You need like one or two undistracted, locked in execution time. 99% of people listening to this podcast episode can cut one to two hours of BS out of their day. I did some research for this podcast episode. The average American spends five hours a day on their phone, some of them up to eight or nine hours a day. But let's just say five hours a day. Worldwide, it's four and a half hours. So let's actually use worldwide four and a half hours. Well, look at that. We just found an hour or two where you can cut your time. Could you like, think about this for a second? I think about this all the time. And this is what really gets me to disconnect from my phone. Could you imagine getting to the end of your life? You're 95 years old. Oh my gosh. You're at the end of your life and you're looking back on all of the memories and everything that you did do, and you're realizing that you didn't create the life that you wanted because you were watching what other people were doing with their lives on a tiny little screen. Ugh. Like, that's not a life well lived. That's a life wasted. And that's the thing I always think about when I'm like, I'm gonna pick up my phone and see what other people do, and nope, don't give a fuck what anybody else is doing. I need to focus on my life, right? What if you're like, oh, well, I'm not ready yet. I need to get ready? That's just perfectionism in disguise. And perfectionism is just a mask for some sort of fear that you're wearing. You know, it's like the fear of not being good enough or the fear of rejection, the fear of other people's opinions, or the fear of, you know, failing in some sort of way. And so what you really need to do is you need to start. The only way to get ready for something, like, to be ready and to be confident in something is. Is through reps. You don't become confident and then take action. You take action, and you become confident from that action. And so one thing that I recommend that helps that is to try to start yourself off with small daily wins every single day for the next 90 days. Get out of your bed the moment that your alarm goes off. Win number one, make your bed. Win number two, and then don't look at your phone until you leave the house for work. Win number three. That right there is three wins. You met. You got out of your. Your bed when you wanted to. You made your bed. So it's a little, teeny, tiny win, and you didn't look at your phone. So that that moment that you woke up until you left your house was fully focused on you and your life. That's three wins right there. Do not underestimate how much tiny little wins in the morning start you off on the right foot and help you build momentum. And that momentum is what you need in order to build. Build a really great day and in turn, a really great life. You know, I want you to just think about this for a second, right? Think about the person that you want to be and imagine if you were that person 90 days from today, how much different could your life be 90 days from today until the day that you die? It could completely change your life if you stop overthinking, if you stop negotiating with your potential, if you went all in, if you didn't wait for another year to go by, if you just said, I'm going to go all in on myself, you can look at anyone that has absolutely changed their life. And you can see that those people don't wait for motivation. They make a plan real quick. Who do I want to be? What do I need to get done? And then they take completely ridiculously imperfect action. You got 90 days. 90 days to shut out the world and build something real. 90 days to become the person that you've been postponing for years. 90 days to earn back your own self respect and 90 days to start building the rest of your life. So my challenge to you is to figure out who you need to become. Write it down on a piece of paper, figure out what actions that person would take, put it down on a piece of paper, and then use that as your North Star for what actions you need to take every single day for the next 90 days. And if you do that and you are really, really serious about it, you wake up 90 days from today and you will be a different person than you are listening to this right now. So that's what I got for you for today's episode. If you love this episode, please share it on Instagram. Stories Tag me obdialjr. R O B D I A L J R and if you're out there and you love this podcast, you wanna learn more about coaching with me? Outside of the podcast, I've got programs that go from 12 weeks to 12 months. You can go to coachwithrob.com right now. Once again, coachwithrob.com and with that, I'm going to leave you the same way I leave you every single episode. Make it your mission to make somebody else's day better. I appreciate you and I hope that you have an amazing day.
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