How to change the world around you | The Mindset Mentor Podcast

Welcome to today's episode of the Mindset Mentor Podcast. I'm your host, Rob Dial. Today what we're going to be talking about is how to change the world around you. I'm going to teach you how to change the world around you by the way that you show up into it. And really what I want you to do and I want you to start thinking about is why you should have the highest expectations for every single thing that you do. The highest, like the absolute highest expectations for everything that you do. But first, before I do that, I want to tell you a really, really quick story. If you wake up in the morning and you meet an asshole, you just met an asshole. But if you wake up in the morning and you meet assholes all day, you are the asshole. Why is that? Why do I say that? Why do I give you one of my favorite pieces at the very beginning of the podcast episode? Because if you meet somebody and they're an asshole to you, well, yes, when you just met was an asshole. But if you meet people all day long and every single person is, it's because you are the asshole. It's because the way that you are showing up is actually changing the way that other people are showing up as well. So let's use that example. Do you think that if you are having a really bad day and you go in into every single conversation with that energy, do you think that that energy that you are bringing is going to influence the people that you're in conversations with? Of course. Absolutely. Why is that? Because the way that you show up affects everything that you do and affects everyone else around you. It will change everybody else around you. It will change the entire outcome of every situation that you're in. Even if someone's having a great day, they're having the best day possible, and then an asshole comes up to them, it can completely change their mood. So you could, you could be in a really bad mood and be bitching and moaning and all of this stuff and boop, boop, do I'm having such a bad day and somebody else is having an amazing day and it's like the best day and things went awesome and they had their coffee and they hung out with their kids and they got a great workout in and they're feeling amazing. They listen to their favorite, you know, Taylor Swift song on the way to work and they're just riding high. And then you come in and you just come in with that energy. You can bring their energy down. It's possible we've had this happen to us before, haven't we? We're having a really good day. You listen to your favorite Taylor Swift song on the way, and then you come in and your boss is an asshole today, and you immediately just get kicked in the face by that and you start to feel like crap? Well, if that's the case, is the exact opposite true, where if we were to go in and literally have the highest expectations for everything that happens, and we think that everything's going to be the best that it could possibly be, and we have the highest expectations for everything. And when I say highest expectations, what I mean is we believe that it is going to come out amazing for every single thing that we do. Would that influence the way that we show up in the world? Sure. And if we show up that way, will it influence other people around us? Sure. And by influencing other people around us, could it actually start to sway our lives into more of a positive sense? Sure, of course. Could. Why is this important? Because imagine how the world around you would change if you showed up differently, if you showed up with the highest expectations of everything that you do. You know, I was talking with my sales team about a week or so ago, and you know, one of the things that's real funny when you're in sales for a while is that sometimes you get on a call with somebody and they say the phrase, I'm not gonna buy anything, Right? Like when I was first in sales and I was 19, 20 years old, we used to call people up and we would be referred to people, and they would say, okay, yeah, you could come over and give me a presentation, but just so you know, I'm not gonna buy anything. And then you just go, shit. All right, well, I guess I'll just go anyways, I got nothing else to do on that day. And you go in there and you just kind of go through the motions. And here's this. And here's this part of my presentation. This is what my company does, and this is what we can do for you. Do you think that if you go in with the energy of, ah, that person's probably not going to buy because they said they're not going to buy. That showing up that way is going to influence whether that person actually does buy or not? Sure. A person at the highest level, the same enthusiasm. When I say enthusiasm, I don't mean fake enthusiasm. I mean fully authentic enthusiasm. And the goal was just to make a true connection with that other person and connecting with them and just to go, you know what? Screw it. Whether this person buys for Me, I want to make this interaction between us the highlight of their day. When they're going to bed and they're sitting down and they're, you know, laying down in their bed, and they're about to close their eyes, they do close their eyes, and they're just thinking about their day. Whether they buy from me or not, I want them to think, damn, I had such a good time when I was talking to that guy Rob today. Even if that person tells me that they won't buy, but my intention is literally just to try to impact that person or make them feel that way. Do you think that it's probably going to influence whether someone does or does not buy? Of course. Absolutely. Same way, though, if I show up and I'm like, yeah, I'm just gonna kind of go through the motions and just say the things I know I'm supposed to say. But they already said they're not gonna buy, so I'm not really gonna be that enthusiastic. And I'm not gonna tell them I'm gonna skip this part of the presentation because what does it really matter? And I'm not gonna ask them for the order. That's also going to influence the way that they are and how they connect with. With me and with my product and with the company that I work for or the company that I own. The way that you show up in the world influences the way that the world shows up to you. Think about that for a second. How many times have you just gone into a situation, just be like, well, whatever, I guess, let's do this, you know? And the funny thing is, like, if you've been in sales for a long time, you know that the people who usually say they're not going to buy usually buy the most. Just usually the way that it works. So if you show up with less enthusiasm because someone told you they're not gonna buy, they're not gonna buy at all because you showed up with less enthusiasm. You know how many people out there are listening right now, and you're showing up to an old relationship as the same old version of you with the same expectations. How many of you are showing up to that same old relationship as the same version, even though you've been changing, you know, maybe you've been. And you've known this person. Maybe it's your sister, your brother, right? Let's just say it's your brother, and you've known him your entire life, 35 years. And you're just showing up the same way that you've always shown up. And when you show up that way, guess what you're gonna get from him? The same version of him you've always gotten the past 35 years. So many people just don't enjoy the relationships that they're in, or they want them to change, but they refuse to change the way that they show up to the relationship. The thing that's interesting about people, and I don't really have time to go into it in this episode, is you're never actually in relationship with another human. Never. You think that you're in a relationship with another human. Like, if you have a brother, you think that you're in relationship with your brother, but you're not. You are in a relationship with the image that you have built of your brother, and your brother is in a relationship with the image that he has built of you. And so when you show up the exact same way that you always have, you are reinforcing the image of him. The image that he has of you in his brain, it's just making it stronger. And he's going to continue to show up to the relationship the exact same way that he always has, because you are showing up the exact same way that you always have. So if you want to change the relationship, what do you need to do? You need to show up differently, which then forces him to go, shit. You know, subconsciously, he's thinking this shit. Maybe this image that I have of him or of her is not who I thought they were. Because when you change who you are, and it doesn't line up with the image of who he's built you to be in his mind, he naturally has to be like, whoa, hold on. This is some cognitive dissonance. This is not what I've always known. It's gonna shake some things up a little bit. He might not be comfortable with it, but what you just say instead of, you know, instead of showing up the same way that I always have and thinking to myself, oh, my brother's just this way, and he's always going to be that way. I'm going to show up with the highest expectations, the best version of myself. Every single time I go into communication with my brother and see how it changes, it will force him to have to change. Because what he's known, this image that he's built of you in his mind that he has this relationship with doesn't line up. So he's got to change. So how many of you are out there and you're just showing up to an old relationship as the same old version of you with the same old expectations. You know, if you're in a relationship with your mom, your mom complains all the time. And when she complains, you end up shutting off. How do you think the conversation would change if you showed up with the highest expectations for your conversation? So instead of you just going in and shutting off immediately because your mom always complains, what if you went in there and you're like, I'm going to actually show up differently in every single conversation with my mom, in every single time that I'm around her in and see if that starts to change our relationship. I'm gonna tell you this, everybody wants to deflect that responsibility to somebody else and be like, well, if I'm gonna change, then they better change. Listen, you're the ones listening to this podcast. They might never want to change. So if you want something to change in the relationship, you're probably going to have to be the one to change in the relationship. And you're gonna have to just say, this is the way that it's going to be from now on. Because what happens is you teach people how to talk to you. You teach people how to treat you. You know, if your mom calls you up and she complains all the time, or maybe she calls and she says, you know, all of the negative things that's happening in the news and how the world's going, you know, anytime something in news is newsworthy, it's, oh my gosh, did you hear about this thing that, oh my gosh, did you hear about this person? Did you hear about that? This country's doing this, oh my gosh, the world is going to shit. And she loves to call you to tell you when she's afraid. And you just keep listening and keep answering, keep listening, keep answering. You're enabling that behavior from her. But when you decide, you know what, I'm gonna finally set boundaries. And I'm going to say, I am no longer going to accept these phone calls. I'm no longer going to, you know, take these, this fear mongering that she has because it's just something she does and maybe it makes her feel better to talk to somebody about it and gives her a false sense of safety. I'm gonna set boundaries. Well, then she's eventually going to have to change the way that she shows up in the relationship with you. You know, how are you showing up in circumstances with your kids? You know, we've been talking about your brother, your sister, your mom. How are you showing up in relationship with your children when you Start thinking about the life that you want. Most people, like I've said many times, are focusing on what they don't want in life. They don't want it to go this way. They don't want it to go this way. They don't want it to go this way. If you think it to yourself, I don't want it to go this way. I don't want it to go this way. And then you go out and take action. You're going to attract what you don't want to go that way. And then it goes that way. And you're like, oh, damn it, why did it go that way? Partially because of the way that you showed up. Your life is all about the way that you view everything that happens to you and the way that you show up. How can you show up to everything that you do with the same energy that you did the night before Christmas as a kid? Do you remember that? Do you remember how you felt the night before Christmas or the night before you went on a field trip with school, or the night before your parents were going to take you to Disney? It was, like, hard to sleep and you had all of that energy. What if you showed up, like, the same way? Let's just not even say that. Christmas morning or the day when you're going to go to Disney or you're going to take that trip that you always wanted to, that endless amount of energy and enthusiasm and extremely high expectations for how amazing this is going to go. What if you showed up to every single conversation that way? What if you showed up to every single day that way? Where you decided to just set your reticular activating system to, I'm going to make this the best possible day that I can see. If you wake up and you just think about your problems and pity and woe is me, and I'm the victim. You're going to change the world around you to reflect how you're feeling inside. The world will be a reflection of the way you're feeling inside. Of course you're not going to get what you want in life. Of course you're not going to be excited about going out into your day because the world will reflect back to you how you feel on the inside. But if you just wake up and you say, you know what? I'm going to make this the best fucking day that I can make, this is going to be an amazing day. I'm going to do everything that I can. I'm going to focus on how I can be grateful if negative shit happens, I'm going to just look at it and smile and say, thank you, universe, for giving me this lesson that I needed to in my life. And you have the absolute highest expectations. I'm going to go into every single conversation with as much love to connect with the other person, to give them the best version of me, to see if maybe I can influence the world around me and change them for the better. How do you think that your life would be different if you went into every single conversation the same energy as you did and enthusiasm? Once again, authentic enthusiasm, not just like fake person with the same enthusiasm that you did when you woke up for Christmas in the morning? How would the outcomes in your life change? Do you think that there would be differences? Absolutely. How would you change? How would every person around you that you communicate with change? Because just as the same way, if you wake up and you meet an asshole, you meet an asshole. But if you meet assholes all day long, it's because you're the asshole. Hey, if you wake up and one thing goes really well, one thing went really well. But if you wake up and everything goes really well, it's because of the way that you showed up. So start paying more attention the way that you show up with the highest expectation you possibly can, with the highest enthusiasm you possibly can. And see, just try it on for a day, see how it fits, see how it feels. And start to notice that you influence the world around you much, much more than you could possibly realize. So that's what I got for you for today's episode. If you love this episode, please share it on Instagram stories and tag me obdialjr. R O B D I A L J R. And with that, I'm gonna leave you the same way I leave you every single episode. Make it your mission. Make somebody else's day better. I appreciate you and I hope that you have an amazing day.