Rob Dial lost his father at 15 and tells a grieving man that the pain never fully goes away, just comes in smaller waves. The scars left by love prove you had something real. Honor him by living purposefully.
Chapters
I miss you, dad. There's so much I want to tell you. And I know you're with me, but it's so hard. Just wanted to say hi. How are you?
No.
No, I'm not doing well. I just really need somebody to talk to. Do you have a few minutes?
I know exactly how you feel. I do. I lost my dad when I was 15. And he was just. He was exactly the same. He was my rock as well. And I know a lot of people who have died, too. But I wish I could say that you get used to people dying, but I don't think that anyone really does. And to be honest, I don't think that I want to. You know, whenever someone that I love dies, it feels like something's just ripped apart inside of me. And I don't want it to just not matter, you know? I don't want it to be something that just passes. And I think my scars are just a testament to the love and the relationship that I had with that person. And if the scar is deep, so is the love for them. And scars are a testament that I can love deeply and that I can be cut and sometimes really, really deep. But I want to continue to live and continue to love. As far as grief that comes from it, I don't know, it kind of comes in waves. It's like a shipwreck. And when the ship is first wrecked, man, everything around you reminds you of them. And all you can do is just float. Just try to stay alive. And in the beginning, like you are now, the waves are 100ft tall, and they crash over you without mercy. And they come 10 seconds apart, and they don't even give you really time to catch your breath. And all you can do is just hang on and just float. But you never really know what's going to trigger the grief. Might be a picture or smell of a cup of coffee or something. It's just about anything. But in between the waves, there's life. Somewhere down the line, though, you'll find the waves that are only 80ft tall and then 50ft tall. And while they still come, they come a little bit further apart. And honestly, the waves never really stop coming, and you don't really want them to. But remember this. Death might be the most important part of life because it gives you the drive to keep pushing forward. It's this beautiful thing that gives you the urgency to create the life that you want. So give yourself the permission to feel what you're feeling right now. It's okay. But don't let it hold you back. Honor your dad by loving him and learning from this. But also go out and make your own beautiful life as well. That's something that's important to remember.
Yeah. I just miss him.
Yeah. I miss my dad as well. Yeah, but it'll get better.
