The PSYCHOLOGICAL Tricks To BUILD MASSIVE CONFIDENCE Today | Rob Dial

The question is, do you truly, truly love yourself? If you don't, that's the reason why you're not taking the action that you need to. So today we're talking about what is self discipline. I think that self discipline is thought of as kind of a bad thing for a lot of people. Like, everybody wants discipline, but they see discipline as a bad thing. And so we're going to dive into the subject of self discipline, how to be more disciplined, and I'm going to talk about more of what it is as well. So at its simplest form, there's two things that I really see self discipline being. Number one is doing what you say you will do. That's the first thing that I say, is self discipline. And the second thing is doing what you need to do even when you don't want to do it, right? So self discipline is going out and doing what you say you're going to do, number one. And then going out and doing what needs to be done even when you don't want to do it. Especially when you don't want to do it. And I want to cover the word discipline first. Because when we think, think of the word discipline, like if you discipline your dog, that means your dog has done something bad, right? If you discipline your child, that means your child has done something bad. So I want to pull the word discipline out and change your perception of it. Because ultimately I think that we all have a bad connotation of discipline. And if our brain subconsciously has a bad connotation towards something, we are going to try to avoid it. And what I'm going to talk about today is ultimately how self discipline is actually the key to self love. And that's what I'm gonna tell you about today and what we're gonna dive into. Because most people, when they think of self discipline, think, oh my God, I don't wanna be. I wanna be disciplined, but I don't think I can be disciplined. That's too hard for me to be disciplined. And that's what I'm gonna talk about today, is how the key to loving yourself deeper is to actually be unlocked through self discipline. Because ultimately the core of that, if you really dive into it, you never need to be disciplined to do something that's bad for you, right? You need discipline to do something that's good for you. Like, you don't need discipline to eat a pizza, you don't need discipline to sleep in. You don't need discipline to sit on the couch and do nothing, right? You need discipline to do the things that are good for you and if you're doing the things that are good for you, ultimately that is a way to cultivate self love. So for instance, self love is not eating that pizza when you know you shouldn't. Self love is to have the self discipline to eat something that's healthier because ultimately it's better for your body. Self discipline is, is not hitting the snooze button and waking up because you know that if you wake up when you wanted to, you're going to be able to start your day off right. And if you start your day off right, it'll end up becoming a better day. It's the self discipline to do that. It's the self love knowing that when you do that, you will ultimately better self love. And self discipline is not taking it easy after a hard day of work. But to go to the gym because you made a contract with yourself that you will go to the gym after work. You know, it's about doing what you say you're going to do and not going, you know what, I had a long day, I'm gonna take the day off, right? It's the discipline to do, as I said in the beginning, what you don't want to do, especially in the times when you're like, I really don't want to do it. It's to be able to push past what you actually think that you can do. And that's the important thing, you know, it's to do what you say you're gonna do. Especially when you have a contract with yourself, not just to do what you say you're gonna do when other people involved. But if, like the last example that I just gave you, if you said, I'm gonna go to the gym today at 6 o' clock after work, then you have a long day at work and you don't go to the gym. That has nothing to do with anybody else. That's you lying to yourself. That is you breaking a contract with yourself. And when you break a contract with yourself, that's not coming from a loving state, right? There's no self love in breaking that contract with yourself and going, you know what, you had a long day at work, go ahead and pick up some pizza and ice cream, go watch some Netflix. No, self discipline is needed to do the things that are good for you. To wake up early, to meditate, to work out, to eat healthy, to do all of those things that cultivate a foundation for you, to build a better version of you. Self discipline is not breaking promises to Yourself. Because ultimately it's very easy for people to stay accountable when someone else is relying on them. It's very easy to go, you know what? These people are depending on me. I'm gonna put in the work. But then to let ourselves slip when it's something that just requires us for some reason. It's very easy for people to do things for other people, but it tends to be very hard for them to do something for themselves. And if you truly love yourself, you will develop the self discipline to get done whatever it is that you need to get done to create the life that you want. And so self discipline more than anything else, is not breaking the promises that you have made to yourselves. Cause ultimately that's what matters more than anything else. And it doesn't have to be just taking action too. Like I said, you know, eating healthy or going to the gym or any of that stuff. It could be literally meditating, doing absolutely nothing but sitting there and focusing on your breath with your eyes closed and allowing your body just to come down from its heightened state. Because you want your body to relax, because you want your mind to relax. And because, you know, ultimately, if you meditate, you know, every single morning for those 10 or 15, 20 minutes that you're gonna go into your day, a better version of yourself. A calmer, more gentler, more loving version of yourself. And when you are a better version of yourself, you are presenting that better version of yourself to everyone that surrounds you. So not only do you benefit from the meditation, but everybody else benefits. See, the thing that's interesting about self discipline is you benefit a lot from it, but everybody else around you benefits as well. There is no loser in self discipline. The only time when there's a loser is when you let yourself off the hook when you shouldn't. You need to stop breaking promises to yourself. Because ultimately you matter more than anybody else in your life. Now, I understand how this works. Cause I've done this many times. I've coached thousands of people. Most people at this point, like mothers or fathers, say, well, I'm not the most important person in my life. My children or my spouse or whatever it is is the most important person in my life. I can't say that I am right. There's no way. That would be selfish. That would be narcissistic. I can't say that I am the most important person in my life. Yes, you can, and you should. And if you don't, you're completely down the wrong path. I'm not saying ignore your children. What I'M saying is have the self discipline and the self love to work on yourself. Because we know if you say your children are the most important people in your life, if you are the best version of yourself, are you going to show up as a better parent for them? You are. So if you really truly love them, shouldn't you really truly be loving and working on yourself even more? Because then you're gonna show up better for them. If you really truly love your spouse, shouldn't you work on yourself even more so that you can show up as the best version of yourself? Because here's the thing, the better that you show up, the better that they will be and they will grow and become better from you being better. So you can't break the promises to yourself, but then give everything to everybody else. Because here's the way it seems like a catch 22 for most people. When you work harder on yourself, you show up better for everybody else that's around you. So self discipline is not breaking those promises to yourself. So what is self discipline? Self love is self discipline. The not breaking promises to yourself or self discipline doing what you say you're going to do is self discipline. I'm not saying be hardcore on yourself all day, every single day, because that's not sustainable. You know, if you want to go out and have a pizza every once in a while. I'm not saying don't ever have a pizza. What I'm saying is we know where the limit is. We know when there's a line that we're crossing that we shouldn't be where. It's like, well, this is my third pizza of the week. Well, that's probably a problem. Oh, this is my 10th beer of the night. Oh, that's probably a problem. This is my, you know, 37th day sleeping in. Ah, that's probably a problem, right? I'm not saying be so hardcore on yourself, but what I'm saying is know where the limit is and don't allow yourself to keep passing that limit. Don't allow yourself to keep passing that line, right? You have to have the discipline to hold yourself accountable when you need to. Because if you truly, truly love yourself, if you love yourself and come from a place of love, you will have the discipline that you need to to make yourself better. What we all want to do is to become the best version of ourselves. But we can't become that best version of ourselves unless there's some self discipline there. That's what we have to realize. Ultimate fulfillment is not success in cars and clothes. And money and houses, these massive mansions and Ferraris in the driveway. That's not ultimate success and fulfillment. Ultimate fulfillment is you becoming the highest version of yourself in this lifetime, the most actualized version of yourself in this lifetime. That is ultimate fulfillment. And anything that holds you back from that is in the way. Because the better that you are, the most perfect, actualized version of yourself is going to go out and serve the world much higher than the version of you that's not the highest version of yourself. So you have to think about that. If you truly want to change the world, you've gotta focus on yourself. Because then when you focus on yourself, you go out and present that version of yourself and you're much better. When we are better, we serve the world at a higher level. We serve our family at a higher level. We serve every being that we come in contact with at a higher level. When we think about ourselves and we truly. This is the interesting thing is a lot of people think, well, I don't have the self love and the self discipline that I truly want because when I look in the mirror, I don't love my body. And so people want to have a better body, but they don't develop the discipline to get that better body. They think, well, if I had that better body. Let me rewind. If I had that better body that I truly want, I feel like I love myself more. But here's the thing, the key to getting that better body is to love yourself more now. Because here's the thing. If you love somebody, you'll do anything that you can to help them out, don't you? If they need you, you'll do anything that you can to help somebody out that you truly, truly love, right? The question is, do you truly, truly love yourself? If you don't, that's the reason why you're not taking the action that you need to. You don't have self discipline to do what you need to do because you don't have the self love that you truly need to have. Let me give you an example. If I have my body and I want to be the best version of it, I'm gonna need to eat healthy, I'm gonna need to work out, I'm gonna need to do the things I need to do to take care of my body. Why? Why do I work out so hard and eat so healthy? Because I truly love my body. So no matter what your body looks like right now, you can't think that you'll love yourself more. When you get to losing 50 pounds, you can't think, oh my God, when I finally get to this weight or look like this, or fit in that bikini, I will finally love myself. No, you have to start from a place of self love. And the more that you love your body, the more that you will truly want to take care of it. And you say, if I love my body, do I want to put this food into it? Whatever this food is, this pizza or this, you know, my third pizza of the week or this seventh beer that I'm drinking. If I truly love myself and I love, truly love my body, do I want to do that? No, I don't. I want to put into it the best things I possibly can. Would you go ahead and just allow your child to eat seven pizzas every single, you know, week, every single night eat pizza? No, because it's not good for them. Why would you allow yourself to essentially do the same types of things? So self love is not a destination. Self love is a starting point. And when you truly love yourself, self discipline ends up building itself in there because you go, you know what? I do love myself. I'm going to go ahead and work out so that I can take care of myself. I'm going to eat healthier so I can take care of myself. I'm going to drink more water so I can take care of myself. I'm going to read so I can take care of myself. I'm going to meditate so I can take care of myself and stop sleeping in. I'm going to create a morning routine so I can take care of myself because I truly love myself. And when you start from a place of self love, self discipline is much easier to get. And that's the thing that most people don't think about. Self love creates self discipline. Love yourself first, then you will have the discipline to take care of yourself. So what is self love? I'm sorry, what is self discipline? Self love is self discipline. Keeping the contracts and the promises that you want to with yourself and you said you were going to do keeping those promises is self discipline. Doing what you say you will do is self discipline. And doing what you need to do, especially when you don't want to do it, is also self discipline. Hey, thanks so much for watching this video. If you want to learn even more about mastering your mind, click right here and watch this video. Video as well. People always think success is some big massive event. No, success in whatever it is that you want to do is a bunch of little teeny, tiny tedious things that you do every single day. Over and over and over and over again, and the success just stacks on top of itself.