Dealing with Negative Criticism and Haters

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I want to talk today for a.

Minute about criticism and the hate or dislike or ridicule or criticism generally that you're going to get when you start putting yourself out there on the line. And so I was reading through comments to one of the ads which is the most brutal thing you can do to yourself online is to have a paid ad that's out there, particularly if it's been out there for any length of time. And you'll find that if you read the comments, they're brutal. They're absolutely brutal. And there's a lot of anger and negative energy and hate that's out there, particularly for ads, which I find is interesting because the ads obviously power the ability for people to have these cool free services like LinkedIn and YouTube, Facebook and Instagram and all that. We don't have to pay for those because of ads. Yet people are like, I'm so sick of seeing your face. I have to wake up to your face every morning. Because of Google was one of the ones that I got today. I got another one that says, looks like my drunk uncle Dudley. I've had a couple of people that say, you know, I don't know why I said looks interesting but, but that face. This guy is clearly an alcoholic, which is really funny because I don't actually drink that much, but oh, and, and he's got yellow teeth and he's got a big nose and all this other stuff. And so if you ever want humility, if you think you're too good looking or, or smart or whatever, because also they say scam. All this is available online anyway for free. I can't believe that they're selling this, I'm calling bs, all of that kind of stuff. And, and people will ask, does this work? And somebody will say, no, it doesn't. It's really interesting because you, as the person who's putting yourself out there, and I'm speaking to you who are watching this, are listening as someone who's trying to either make change in the world or share your knowledge or experience or even your genius with the rest of the world, if you are trying to put yourself out there to help other people and also to earn money, then you're going to experience this. And you have to understand that the people who are hating and the people who are criticizing and saying all of the hurtful things to you are doing that because they're mad. They're either mad that they can't get everything in the world for free and that these tech platforms like YouTube and TikTok and Instagram are making them see these ads that you're paying for to get your message out there. They think they should have that for free when it costs hundreds of millions, if not billions of dollars a year for these companies to provide this information. And these are profit making companies and people that are doing that are pissed off about that are, they're mad that they get this amazing service and they have to pay with their attention or this interruption to what they actually want to be able to consume it for free. So they're angry about that. So when you get that hate from those people, you're not getting something that's directed at you. You're getting something that's being made up to make you feel bad, to make, to hopefully stop you from paying for ads which would ultimately cause them not to have the service that they want for free anyway. So I think if you think about that that way that can help. If you think about the people that say hurtful things about how you look or about your material that you're providing, most of them have never consumed the material. And again, you're getting hate because they don't want to see your ad again, which I get. And, or maybe they want to see somebody that they think is beautiful in their eyes, but you're fine just the way you are so you don't have to be. I replied to one of them that said, you know, I'm tired of seeing your ugly face every morning. I was like, I'm going to see if I can get the Brad Pitt filter put on my next ads, right? So I think you can respond to those people or you can ignore them, but the one thing that, that I would really urge you not to do is to ever take it personally. Because it's never about you. It's always about them. It's always about the problems they're having. It's about their dissatisfaction with their life. It's about their dissatisfaction with their lack of success, with their lack of wealth, with their lack of income, with their lack of happiness. And if they're putting all that bad energy out there and all those bad things, then is it surprising that that's what they're getting back for you though? I just want you as you're thinking about maybe putting yourself out there and you're afraid of that criticism. You're afraid of people saying that your stuff doesn't work, even though they've never bought it, never consumed it, never tried it. If you're afraid of them saying, well, you can get it free online, even though it doesn't exist for free online, and certainly not in the organized fashion that you might put it out there, just remember that there is no success without risk of failure and there's never success without criticism. So you won't ever make everybody happy. As long as you are, however, reaching some people and changing some lives for the positive, then I think it's worth it. I think it's worth all of the insults that they'll throw at you, particularly if you can deflect them and realize that it's not about you, that it's not personal. And they'll say, somebody will watch this and say, it is about you. I hate you. And you're ugly and you're mean and you're stupid and you know, but it doesn't matter. You don't take that in. You don't take that personally. You say, the, the reward that I get is internal, knowing that the information that I'm sharing and the content that I'm providing will help at least one person and what will be really validating for you above all that other stuff, which I don't usually read those anyway, but I do from time to time because I think it's good to see what is the feedback that's out there in the world. But when you do, remember that you'll start to get people who message you, who email you, who text or call you, who DM you that say, man, you changed my life. I've had in the past week dozens and dozens of messages from people who say, I bought a business for no money out of pocket and I never thought it was possible. You completely changed my life or you referred me so many people for my business once you, once you found out about it and used it, that it changed my life. And that's so rewarding. So when you're looking forward to the next year and when you're looking forward to the next thing that you're going to do that's going to put you out there in the public eye and expose you to criticism and expose you to the hate that is out there, just understand that there's also a lot of love and that there's a few people that you'll impact positively and that those few people's success that you get to have a small hand in being responsible for is the big reward that you will ultimately get. The other good thing is that you can put valuable information out there and get paid for it. That's what people with books do. That's what people who get sponsored and have paid ads like we do on our podcast do like we do on our websites. That is how we are able to contribute positively to the world while also getting compensated for creating value. So just a word that based on kind of reading a bunch of that stuff this morning, I wanted to share with you because I'd like for it not to have a chilling effect on your desire to go out there. I'd like to for it not to stop you from going out and sharing the good that you have and the change that you can affect positively in people's lives. Just because I'd say there are at least as many, if not more haters than there are lovers that are out there. But. But those people aren't your audience and your words are not for their ears.

You've been listening to Business Lunch with Roland Fraser. If you're enjoying the show, let us know by subscribing and leaving a review. And for more information go to businesslunchpodcast.com thank you for listening. Hey, quick question. Do you know someone who's looking to grow as a leader? Maybe their team is growing a little faster than they expected, or maybe their new rule requires them to work a little bit more through people? If the answer is yes, I want to recommend a new podcast by the scalable media network called Ready to Lead. It's hosted by Richard Lindner, one of Roland and Ryan's business partners, and Jeff Mask, who's one of the top executive coaches in the world. They cover tactical strategies on how to improve as a leader and also their biggest failures they've had throughout their career. You can find the show@readytolead.com or search for it wherever you listen to podcasts.

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