In this chapter‑long audio excerpt from Sally Koering Zimney’s Speaking Story audiobook, the host introduces Chapter 32, “Positive Self‑Talk,” and explains how the internal narrative we tell ourselves shapes our physiological response to speaking. Zimney argues that while positive self‑talk cannot eliminate adrenaline, it can change our relationship to it, turning fear into excitement and shifting focus from perfection to authentic connection. She shares personal mantras (e.g., “You’ve got this,” “They’re with you,” “I can’t wait to share this”), cites neuroscience about neural pathways reinforcing repeated thoughts, and offers two core reframes: (1) replace “I’m nervous” with “I’m excited,” and (2) prioritize audience connection over flawless performance. Practical body‑mind tactics—deep breathing, exercise, preparation, appropriate clothing—are presented as “outside‑in” work that supports the mental shift. The segment also includes brief testimonials from Carrie, Tony, and Todd praising Zimney’s coaching, and promotional calls‑to‑action for the Be Moved Institute and the $49 Unspeaker Simple Storytelling course. The overall message is that intentional, positive internal dialogue, combined with physical preparation, creates a neuro‑biological “superhighway” that fuels confident, authentic speaking.
Chapters
Well, mm, okay, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, let's try that again. Okay, team. Oh my gosh, let's keep rolling on this. We are so excited to have you along for the ride as you keep diving in chapter by chapter, part by part. And we are at the final part of the book Speaking Story. And once again, hello, my name is Sally Koering Zimney. I am a keynote speaker and author. And the host of This Moved Me, the podcast that you're listening to right now, whether you are listening to it free on your podcast feed or you're listening on YouTube or who knows wherever this gets spliced and diced and is out in the world, wherever, wherever you are, I'm so glad that you're here because ultimately I put this out into the world for free because I want more people to have these ideas so that you can more confidently and clearly stand up and share what is true for you to help make your mark and pitch your ideas and ignite meaningful change in the world. And I think stories in particular are the powerful sauce that can help you do that.
So yay!
And we are today on chapter 32, which is all about positive self-talk. Whoop, whoop! If you are just like binging your way through part 6, this is some big stuff. And yes, we're gonna talk about actually the body here coming up. But before you talk about the body, you have to talk about what is impacting the body, what makes it difficult for us to really leverage the body with intention so that it is communicating synchronously with us and supporting what it is that you're trying to say rather than feeling like it's working against you, which Can be how it feels sometimes. So we've been talking about mindset and adrenaline and fear, and of course we have landed on the positive self-talk chapter. And this is where we talk about how I am woo adjacent. I like woo. I'll do some woo. I also am like, you know, have a healthy dose of, okay, that's a little wooey. So it's both and it's why I find positive self-talk, just a reframe or two, is important to have at the ready, but ultimately, ultimately, the positive self-talk is what we need in order to do the work required to actually change the biology, change the neural pathways that can help you in the journey of changing your relationship with fear and changing your relationship with yourself and your body as you step into these moments. But positive self-talk alone is not going to work magical wonders on you unless it can help you actually do the thing. Doing the thing is what helps you understand yourself differently and start to see what is possible differently. So hopefully these will help you. These are some of my favorite little shifts. In positive self-talk that have helped me show up. So it's about the inner game and it's a short one, but it's a goodie. Okay, so this whole thing's gonna be short and sweet. Let's keep the intro short and sweet too, shall we? Okay, let's dive in.
Hey everybody, and welcome to This Moved Me, a podcast about creating talks that move the world with me, your host, Sally Koering Zimney. This complimentary listening of the Speaking Story audiobook is brought to you in part by the Be Moved Institute, or as I like to call it, Be Me.
I'm going to let a few people speak for me here. First, Carrie, a senior leader who brought this work inside her organization.
As a leader in my organization, I am often in a position to be in front of people, presenting to clients, running meetings, being asked to speak at a conference, moderate a panel. And working with Sally has really helped me hone my skills, specifically presence, my confidence, my warmth and competence on stage, and really has set me up for success to be a more confident representative for my company. So the ROI is incredible and really sets her apart. It's a repeatable system. Working with Sally has really changed our game.
And then there's Tony, a former Fortune 500 executive.
Regular speaking coaches is giving you, you know, here's how you package the message and here, be sure to stand over here, you know. Sally's brand is all about move, right? So being moved. And so she helps you to communicate from human to human and back.
And Todd.
She really focuses on each individual and what they need to get to the next place. She's so in tune with the moment and what you need at that moment that she individualizes everyone's journey. She calls herself a professional nudger. That is what she does. She keeps pushing in the most loving way possible.
The Be Moved Institute exists to bring this work into organizations at scale.
The real work of helping your leaders communicate with clarity, Courage and genuine human connection. If that's something your organization needs, I want to talk to you. Join the waitlist at sally-z.com/institute.
And if you want to start right now, today, for $49, the Unspeaker Simple Storytelling course is at sally-z.com/unspeaker.
And that'll get you started.
Now let's get into the chapter. Chapter 32: Positive Self-Talk. It's like everyone tells a story about themselves inside their own head, always, all the time. That story makes you what you are. We build ourselves out of that story. Patrick Rothfuss, The Name of the Wind. So if we can't talk ourselves out of a powerful adrenaline response, then what is the role of positive self-talk? Positive self-talk, or mantras, or mindset work cannot ultimately change the presence of adrenaline, but it changes our relationship with the adrenaline. It turns surviving into thriving. People tell me all the time, "This is all so easy for you to say. You don't get nervous." Uh, yes I do. Of course I get nervous. Of course my body starts to freak out. Of course I wonder if I have what it takes. But here's why it doesn't look that way. Firstly, my body has learned that I'm okay, so my 3 minutes is more like 30 seconds. I've been doing this for 20+ years, so I've walked into that pack of lions hundreds of times. And I trust that I will survive. I know what strategies to use to help calm my nerves: deep breathing, exercising the morning of a talk, preparing well, wearing clothes that can deal with all my sweating. I work from the outside in. I take care of my body, I practice in my body, and I trust my body—most of the time anyway. And lastly, most importantly, I don't see the fear as nerves. I tell myself that it's excitement. That's the power of the mind in helping you speak your story. The truth is, the part of my body that sees the pack of lions does have a powerful surge, but then my mind comes in and basically says through all of my mantras, "Aww, look at those friendly kitties!" The physiological response to fear is the same as the physiological response to excitement. The only difference is in how I perceive it and the story I tell myself about it. The most impactful thing you can do to deal with your nerves and adrenaline is to tell yourself a different story about what's happening. One of my core values is positivity. I have been accused in my time of being a bit of a Pollyanna, and that's fine. But I believe in the power of positive thinking, as long as we're also doing the deep work and not avoiding the tough stuff, which is something I'm always working on. Simply saying different things to ourselves and expecting them to create different results is, well, a little woo-woo. But it's also real. As neuroscience tells us, what we consistently say, think, and do makes pathways in our brains. And the deeper and more traveled those pathways are, the easier they are to believe and click into—for good or for ill. So the more we tell ourselves things like, "You've got this," "They're with you," "This is going to be awesome," "They're excited to hear this," or "I can't wait to share this with them," it starts to make this superhighway in your brain. But the opposite is also true. The more you say to yourself things like, "I can't do this," "I'm no good at this," "This will never work," etc., the more you will believe it, and the harder it will be to change that thinking. As that superhighway becomes more and more ingrained, it's much easier to access those feelings and beliefs when we need them. What we think impacts how we feel, and how we feel impacts how we show up in the moment. So what exactly should we be saying to ourselves? Aside from some of my favorites, which you just heard me say, like, "You've got this," "They're with you," "I can't wait to share this with them," there are 2 important reframes that everybody needs to master so that we are telling ourselves helpful things. Reframe number 1: Instead of saying, "I'm nervous," say, "I'm excited." Of course you're nervous. Nervousness is simply a reflection of how much you care. But the word nervous is also negative, and it triggers all kinds of negative reactions within us. So instead, call it what it also is: excitement. They are basically the same thing in terms of how they show up in our bodies, but we feel differently about them. So if we change what we call it, it will change how we feel about it, and that changes how we show up. So please, banish "I'm nervous" from your vocabulary, change it to "I'm excited," and watch how your feelings about the moment evolve. Reframe number 2: Focus on connection, not perfection. This is worth repeating, and I know I've said this already. Your audience wants to connect with you, and they only truly connect with the authentic you, with the fake, overly polished and perfected you? Connection doesn't actually work there. This story has meaning for your audience only because it comes from you, your lived experience, and your perspective. So are we really seeing you? If you can show up open, free, and brave, it can change everything, and I mean that. It's the thing I speak the most about in the world because it is a radical shift for most people. Do you have the courage to reject the idea of perfection and simply walk into the spotlight open and afraid? One of the surprising benefits of shifting our focus from perfection to connection is that, although it's often more vulnerable and requires more courage, It also lowers the bar and brings speaking down from this pedestal of elitism that is keeping too many of us from truly speaking our stories. It means that we can walk into this moment, take a deep breath, and simply focus on the people in front of us. You can ride the ride that you've been given, whatever happens. If you can walk in with openness, then your adrenaline will calm down more quickly. Instead of your fear becoming the armor that keeps you from being fully seen and connected, it becomes fuel for that connection. And as that fear shifts into excitement, it can become the energy that connects the speaker and the audience. That is the end of this chapter of Speaking the Story.
If you want to find the full audiobook ad-free, you can go grab that over on Audible, or you can subscribe subscribe right where you're at right now so you never miss the next episode. And if what Kari, Tony, Todd described earlier sounds like something your leaders need, that ability to get clear, to connect, and actually move the people they're leading, that's exactly what the Be Moved Institute is built for.
It is not a one-and-done workshop.
It's a system. So join the waitlist over at Sally sally-z.com/institute, or if you wanna start right now, go grab that Unspeaker course for $49 at sally-z.com/unspeaker.
