The Top 10 Signs You Are a Joker Broker

Foreign.

This is the no Closer show where you get the latest developments in distressed note investing and learn the secrets of how you can control millions of dollars worth of property. For panties on the dollar. Get educated and entertained by someone who has closed thousands of deals and lives to support you in achieving the same. Now, here's your host, CEO of We Close Nodes, Scott Carson.

Good morning, good afternoon, and good evening, everybody. Hey. Welcome to this episode of the Note closure show. As always, Scott Carson. Excited to be here with you today. Today's episode is a public service announcement. It's a psa. Why? Because of this. There's a lot of out there right now in the markets and I have to laugh. As a real estate investor of over 20 years. Okay. Bought my first property in 2001. All right, 20, 24 years. Right. And being an active investor for a note investor for over 15, I've seen a lot of the stupid that happens out there. A lot of people just absolutely talking out their ass, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah is right. Yes. And there are people out there right now talking about note investing, talking about doing things, and people are watching old videos from years ago thinking they're an expert, thinking they're jack of all trades, or they watched one podcast episode or one freebie class, one pitch fest thing, and they think they're an expert at some things. I can't tell you how frustrating it is when you try to help somebody who's marketing themselves and you try, like, listen, don't say this, don't say that. You sound like a joker broker. You sound like you don't know what the heck you're talking about and they will not take your advice. So. And I've seen more and more people and I don't get why people are doing this. Whoever they're learning this from is the worst thing they can do. It literally makes them look like a joker broker. So I thought we'd have a little bit of fun, okay. A little bit of fun today in this episode to tell you the 10 reasons or the 10 ways to tell that you are a joker broker. We're gonna do it David Letterman style, you know, late night. You know what I mean? We miss Dave because the original late night TV was pretty good. Him and Carson back in the day, you know, people getting canceled, which I think is kind of good these days because late night TV is just a miss, but it's a mess. But anyway, let's dive into our special no closer show top 10 list, 10 signs you are a joker broker. All right, 10 signs, you're a joker broker. All right? And I get it. Some people don't know because they just don't know. But when somebody tells you something and they don't do it in a mean fashion, they're trying to help educate you, and you keep doing the same thing or you pay no heed to them, then you are shooting yourself in the foot. And you deserve. You deserve to be made fun of a little bit. Okay? And what's sad is I see the same things that's happening more so now that took place back in 2008. 9 and 10. So let's get into it. Yeah. Yeah, baby. Yes. A top 10 list. 10 signs you are a joker broker. Number 10. Number 10. You can't answer questions about your deal. That's right. When I ask you questions about the deal that you are talking about or the asset you have and you can't answer questions about your deal, that tells me you are a joker broker. Look, I have nothing against brokering a deal, but know what the heck you're talking about. Look at the spreadsheet. Look at what you send out beforehand. And this is one of the biggest differences in joker brokers and people who are actually really good brokers. I buy from brokers, but they know what the heck they're talking about. They know some of the details. Or if I ask them a question about it and they don't know, they can get that answer back to me in a timely fashion. You know, they know what's on there. They're providing color about the deal. All right? But if you're a joker broker and you're just slapping shit against the wall, you can't answer any questions. You don't know what the heck they're talking about. That's my first sign that you are a joker broker. All right? Sorry, but that's the case. You can't talk because you are full of. Exactly ain't. It's horseshit. All right, let's move on. Number nine. Drumroll, please. Nine. You send out sanitized lists with no addresses. Yes. Well, yes, That's a sure tell sign. You are a joker broker. All right? And it's, you know, I can't make an offer off of a sanitized list where there's no addresses. Right, Exactly. I just can't do it. I can't. You know, we got a listing today from a broker, and I want to say he's kind of a joker broker. It was a PDF. It was an Excel spread. Excel spreadsheet on a PDF like I can't even look at it to run formulas. It doesn't give me any. The address to the street address is removed. It doesn't show principal and interest amount. It's just piti. I'm like, man, look, I get it. You're telling me it was a 20 year interest rate note, you know, interest only and they know what the amount of finance. I could run a number on it, but since it's on a PDF, I can't run a simple formula. Okay? And I can't sure as I look at values based off of a street name or just a city state zip, okay? There was one big guy who was trying to sell assets with values with no street address. It's like, well, the values there, we'll, you know, we'll tell you what the address is once your offer is approved. And I'm like, that's not a good way to run a business. That is just pure check. Exactly. Don't do that. Don't send out sanitized lists. If you need me to sign a non disclosure agreement, fine, I'll sign a non disclosure agreement, which is what I'm going to sign anyway most of the time with the banks or a hedge fund in a lot of cases. But if you're worried about me trying to go around you, that screams that you were a joker broker and you don't know what you talk about. And especially if you sent me the list to take a look at, you should help me be able to do due diligence on it, not send me this crap and be worried about, oh, somebody's gonna go around. I'm not gonna go around you, all right? I don't have time for that. All right? If you send me a real deal with real information and full information, no sanitized list bullshit, I'll look at it. But that's the number. Number nine on the list of the top ten. All right, top ten signs you at Juberg. Let's go on number eight here. Number eight now. Drum roll. You're always having to jump on a conference call with your partners. Oh my gosh. Yeah. Are you a joker broker? If you do this. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, you are. Because the fact is if I'm calling you and you, it kind of goes to number and I can't answer questions. But you don't actually have a deal. You don't know the details of the deal. You want me to jump on a conference call with somebody with your partner who's not a partner. There's Somebody else representing somebody else. It's called the daisy chain. I hate these things. Literally hate it when somebody says, well, I need to jump on a phone call by my partners to discuss the deal. Exactly. It's all blah, blah, blah, blah. That's why here I start hearing Charlie Brown teaching, and I don't want to waste my time. I don't have time to jump on a conference call to talk about a deal. To talk about a deal, to talk about a deal. If you've got something legitimate, send it over to me. I'll take a look at it, make an offer on it. But if you want me to jump on a conference call and take time, busy time, out of my busy day or came out on my busy day, and you aren't the legitimate source for it, get the hell out of Dodge, get the hell out of the way so the real buyers and the real sellers can make happen. Okay. Moments off of my apologies. Yeah, I may be rude with you on that, but the thing you got to keep in mind is, like, don't waste my time. My time is valuable. So is yours. Insurance. Who is ultimately the actual seller. If there's more than one removed between a buyer and a seller. You're part of a daisy chain, and you are ace joker, broker. All right, moving on. Number seven. Number seven. Drumroll. Free. Your investor has 20 million a month to buy notes. Okay, that is like the biggest serious. Exactly. Had this happen again yesterday. A guy reaches out to me, sees that, we talk about note investing. Hey, do you have notes available for sale? Or he saw that little video I did about the 20 multifamily loans that came across our desk that we're making some offers on, right? Oh, you have notes for sale. Yeah. I'll tell you a couple of reasons this guy didn't pass the monster test. Like, well, we're looking for $20 million in the east coast every month, and I just started laughing. That's number seven. I can't tell you how many times I hear this. And I don't know why 20 million is the arbitrary number that people talked about, but it's always that number. I think goes back to Kenny Rushing, who ran Rush Enterprises. He was teaching people to say they had 20 million a month to buy notes. No, don't say that. If you had 20 million a month to buy notes, you're not going to be dealing with me. Or your investor is sure as hell not going to be dealing with you. All right, 20 million a month, they're going to go direct to banks. Otherwise, they're just going to basically be wasting your time. Yeah, just blah, blah, blah on your ears off. So I'm. That you don't really have a true buyer there. All right. Or a true seller. And when I hear this, I just simply say, nope, not going to happen. Yeah, exactly. I'm gonna take precaution by not sending you anything or blacking you out my list, so don't do that. It is better to say, hey, I've got some money to do so. Or I'm gonna buy from my own portfolio and I've got, you know, some private money to do things that's always much more respected. Saying, hey, I got a quarter million or 100 grand to put to work if you tell me I got 20 million note buyer. 20 million note buyer. And you don't pass a smell test. And you don't. You say other things on this list. You're a joker broker and I'm not going to waste my time with you. And this guy yesterday, they said, got 20 million to buy. I was like, dude, I'm sorry, you sound like a joker broker. Other things just completely. I said, hey, why don't you take this class? Or why don't you sign up for something here? And no, no, no, I can't do that. I'm an expert. Okay? Expert at nothing or an expert in just pure blah, blah, blah bullshit. All right, moving on. Number six, drum roll please. You advertise that you buy and sell everything. Exactly. It's DEFCON 5. We see this happen all the time. I should say you advertise in Facebook groups that you buy and sell notes and that's the only thing you post. You have no profile picture. You don't have anything you're sharing other than that in the group. I don't see you posting anywhere else. Look, if you're just going to free Facebook groups and saying that you buy and sell everything, or I get a phone call that says you're buying and selling everything. No, you're not. I don't buy and sell everything. I like non performing first liens and I look in most states for that stuff. But I'm. I buy first. I buy everything. I buy first seconds. I buy contract for deeds, I buy lease options. I buy thirds. I buy, you know. No, you don't. No, you don't when you say that. That's what I hear. Yep. It's just crap. And you sound like a joker broker, so stop doing that. Tell people what you're looking for. Hey, I'm looking for non performing first things. Or I'm looking for performing notes with a 12 plus yield, all right? With balances of 50k or more. You know, that I can buy from my own investment portfolio. But if you say you buy and sell everything, you look desperate and nobody believes you, okay? No, nobody believes you. Don't do that. Buy for your own portfolio first and be specific. Know what you want. All right? The more specific you are, the more likely are you get something sent to you. But if you say, oh, I buy a multifamily, I buy a commercial, buy hotels, I buy $5,000 notes. And that. I see that, too. We fund anywhere from $5,000 up to 5 million. I know the guy that's doing that, and that is just. He is seriously one of the biggest. He is full of shit, okay? Full of it. Can't complain. I may piss some people off. I don't care. Because you people need to understand what you're doing. You're making yourselves look bad. I am trying to help you. Help me help you not look like a joker broker. Okay, well, that's number six. All right? You advertise that you buy and sell everything. No, you don't. Please stop saying that. Okay, let's roll into the top five here. All right? Number five, drumroll, please. Use your social media profiles don't pass the test. That's right. Your social media profiles don't pass because it's the easiest way for people to go take a look and see what you're doing. Yes, I misspelled. Uh, it's supposed to be your. But anyway, if you send me a direct message, guess what? I'm going to click on your profile photo and go look to see what the heck you're doing. If you have nothing to do with real estate, or you don't look professional, or you're not talking about notes or anything like that, guess what? That doesn't pass this test. Doesn't pass a smell test. All right? If you have a LinkedIn profile, it says nothing about real estate with only like 5 connections or 10 connections. And it shows that you, like, work at a convenience store or something like that. There's nothing wrong with working a convenience store. If you show that you've done something, you've got to start looking at your profiles and realize they are your business cards. It's what people see. I mean, if you're over there doing selfies and squeezing your biddies together, you know, that doesn't look professional. Unless you're trying just to attract male asset managers, okay? To send you stuff and some of those guys out there might just do that. But what I'm trying to get at is act professional. Clean up your social media profile. It's okay to have fun, but talk about real estate or talk about note investing or share something specifically on LinkedIn if whatever social media profile is your course of action. If you're targeting LinkedIn or Facebook, guess what? Make it look professional. The guy that reached out to me yesterday said he got 20 million a bot. Doesn't look like he has 20 bucks in his pocket. And I get not being and not having a lot of resources. Totally understand it. Been there, done that. Don't do this. This makes yourself look even worse. At least take the time. Take a selfie in a collared shirt. Talk a little about there's so much free ways to share information with YouTube videos or articles, talking about what you're doing. Post stuff on there. If you're not posting anything in months or it looks like something you did years ago, guess what? Time to get rid of the glamour shots photo. We had a guy years ago, one of the nicest guy, but his LinkedIn photo looked like he had just gotten his hair dyed jet black. In real person, he looked like Santa Claus. Okay, so he looked like he worked, you know, like the Keith Fernandez hair commercials where everything going get rid of the gray and go black dark sunglasses. In real life, he was fully gray and probably about 100 pounds heavier. Look, we've all been there, struggle with weight, stuff like that. But please make yourself look something new. If you got a gold or pink boa around your head and you've got a photo from 30, 40 years ago because you're afraid of ageism, I'm sorry. Update your photo. Hell, use an AI image at least to make yourself look better. But make sure that your social media profiles pass the smell test. If you have any questions, reach out, I'm glad to tell you. All right, that may sound harsh, but I'm just trying to save you some issues. All right, sorry, moving on. Here, number four. Here. Drumroll please. Number four. You don't have a website or professional email. I can't tell you the number of times I had a guy reach out to me who had a Hotmail account today. I'm like, how is anybody supposed to take you seriously if you have a Hotmail account? Now I get it. I have a Gmail account. It's once got Carson at Gmail. Still use it most of the time, but I have a professional email. Scottclose notes.com we have a Professional website. You can even go get a freaking wix account for free and set up a website for you. These things used not to be important, but they are important today to help you pass the smell test. Social media is the free stuff. Guess what? I'm going to take you much more seriously. If you have a professional email and not a Gmail Yahoo AOL account. Okay. Or if Your email is tigerlily05 or sticky bun6969sn.com I'm not going to take you seriously. All right? Or if you got a name, your email matches up nothing with your name. I had somebody do that and I don't understand. If you're going to send me an email, make it look professional, Take the time, go to Google, get you a free domain and host it there so you have a professional email. It speaks volumes. At least taking you seriously. Tiger Lily05 I'm sorry, we're Sticky Bun69. I'm not taking you seriously. So if you don't have a website or professional email, you smell and look like a joker broker. I. All right, moving on. Number three. All right, number three, you are an expert because of YouTube and podcasts. Yes, yes, I'm sorry. Exactly. I've had people, I said, you know, I always like to ask people, how'd you learn about note investing? And when they come to me and they're trying to say I'm buying 20 million, and I asked them how they learned about note investing, who was their mentor? And they start rattling off YouTube and podcasts, I'm like, okay, YouTube and podcasts are not a bad place to learn some information. But don't count that as your primary education. If you don't have the money to take a class, I can understand that. But if you're just too cheap to take a three day class or a two day class from somebody, or even sign up for my one day class@noteweekend.com for free. You're a problem because you don't know exactly what you're talking about. I had a guy reach out the other day who's never taken a class, but he watched some video from seven years ago about seconds. He's won by seconds. You want to buy a portfolio second liens for 50 grand at like 2 grand a pop. I laugh. I laughed at him. I'm like, first of all, I don't buy seconds. Secondly, that's not what seconds are valued at these days. They're way overpriced. So you have to understand, yes, podcasts, YouTube, are a great way to supplement your income to learn about new things, new strategies. But guess what? The best thing you can do is truly get educated on a normal class, a two day, three day class. Learn something about what you're truly diving into. You do wouldn't go to the doctor and expect the doctor to, you know, perform surgery on you by just watching a YouTube video or listening to a podcast about surgery, would you? You wouldn't want to put invest investing your money into something that you just listen about a podcast. You got to learn the ins and outs. And also learning the ins and outs is going to help you be a more effective broker and a more effective investor. But if you just tell me a school of Hard Knocks YouTube and podcasts, I then you scream joker broker and I can't take you seriously. All right, I'm not going to waste my time waiting for you to send me deals because I get people to, oh, I want to just send you deals. I just want to send you deals. Like I don't have time to go through your deals and educate you. I need somebody who's going to send me real deals. All right, if you want to do that, which I think is the short end of the stick. But to really know that it's a deal and not a dud, I don't need you to throw spaghetti against the wall and see what sticks. Don't do that. Your time is more valuable. You'll learn more about it. And if you reach out to a lot of these educators, maybe not all of them, but a lot of them will have different discounts for like military, if you're in past military, first responders, stuff like that. There may be even a way to split up payments to make it more affordable for you. That's part of the reason we have the WCN membership at $97 a month to make education more affordable for you and stretch your payments out versus paying 500 to $1,000 for one of our three day workshops. Okay, I know one on one coaching is not the way and I know some people are pitching their high end coaching right off the bat. I had a phone call today with somebody who's like this guy just tried to sell me on a $20,000 program and I'm brand new to notes. That's not a fit, so don't. I don't expect me to do that. But yes, our YouTube, our podcast is there to help you, but it's not there. Meant to be your main source of investment income. There's a thousand episodes. It would Take you forever to listen to those podcast episodes and what you could condense in three days through a three day class and learn up to date. Information is much more valuable. Okay? So please take the opportunity to get signed up for a workshop. Please learn something. For the love of God, learn something. All right, moving on. Number two. All right, number two, sign that you are a joker broker is you require a POF and LOI before sending anything. Now, what is a pof? It is a proof of funds, a bank statement, a letter from a hard money lender. An LOI is a letter of intent or letter of interest. Okay, I'm gonna tell you right now, banks don't require this stuff. Very few banks require a proof of funds when you're bidding on notes, most of the note sellers don't require you. If you're requiring somebody to send you a proof of funds and a LOI before they'd even looked at a spreadsheet to see what kind of assets you have, you are screaming, hey, I'm a joker broker. Let me waste my, Let me waste your time. Okay, yeah, don't want to do that. I won't waste my time with those. I had somebody tell me, I don't have time. I need to make sure you're a serious buyer. I need to see proof of funds. I'm like, you haven't even told me what type of deals you have. Do I need to send a proof of funds for 500,000 or a million? And I don't submit proof of funds. I'm not going to take my proof of funds letter and give it to you to go out and market it so you can find a list. That's what it screams. Stop doing this. Make people sign an NDA that's much more qualified. And then if they are submitting an offer and you don't feel like they have the opportunity to close it, because if they don't pass a smell test or other things, then require them to submit a proof of funds upon submitting an offer. Okay? Now if I'm going to make an offer and not performing notes, I'm not going to have to fill out an loi. Some people, some idiot taught this years ago and it's the stupidest thing you do. Banks will require an LOI if you're buying notes directly from the primary commercial notes because they're going to want to know what you need to close on due diligence, documents, time, all the other things. You need a loan file. They will do that and take that before note committee to make sure that the buyer who wants 30 days is more attractive than the buyer who wants 45 days or 60 days. It's just a letter of intent or letter of interest. Don't ask us on the front. If you're asking us on the front end, you are shooting yourself in the foot. And you look stupid. Yeah, baby, yeah. We don't want you to look stupid. We want you to be smart. Okay. All right. That takes us to the number one reason, the number one sign that you are a joker broker. What do you think it is? What do you think it is? And this is the clear sign right off the bat. Usually in the first 30 seconds, somebody will say these words, and I realize they are a joker broker, and I do not want to waste my time with them. And all they're going to say is, exactly what is that? It's when you say you refer to yourself as a buyer's or seller's rep. I just vomited, okay? Somebody tells me I'm a buyer's rep, I'm a seller's rep, they've got 20 million a month. No, they don't. If they had 20 million a month, they'd be buying institutionally. Okay, don't say you're a buyer's or sellers. That means you're a joker broker. Okay? Say you're buying for your own portfolio. I would believe that a whole lot, much more than when you say you're a buyer's or sellers rep. But when I hear this, I literally tell people, quit saying that. You look stupid. And everybody can read between the lines that you don't have anything. You're trying to throw something against the wall. You're trying to get a list in and blast it to your list and be part of a daisy chain. Stop doing this, all right? Stop doing this. You, for the love of note investing and everything holy under Jesus Christ the Son, all right, please stop doing these 10 things, all right? And I know there's so many people doing a variety of these things. Five, six, seven of them. I get it. You want to do things. You want to get in as a note investor, and maybe you're short on funds and stuff like that. Guess what, ladies and gentlemen, there's a variety of ways to get things started. You can update your spreadsheet, I mean, update your profiles to make it look professional. You can get your free email hosting thing. You can get your free website. Those things alone. And then what you say coming out of your mouth needs to sound good and crystal clear. Not exactly. And unfortunately, I get if you've never taken a class and you just tried to study from YouTube and podcast, well, hopefully this podcast is one that you're listening to and you're learning from. It's been fun teaching this and going through this episode. Guys, if you really want to learn how to buy notes direct from banks without looking like a joker broker and learn how to raise millions of dollars in private capital, then please check out my virtual Note Buying workshop. We actually have our next workshop this Friday, Saturday, Sunday, July 25th through the 27th. If you're watching this after that or listening to this after that, check out note Buying for Dummies.com will usually have the next workshop roughly two to three months afterwards. Or check out our website@weclosenotes.com to find out the different classes and education things that we offer. I'm here to help you guys succeed. We've been around for a long time and I don't know of anybody else who's just going to tell it to you straight like we do. And if you're curious and got questions or wondering what the heck to do, guess what? Guess what? No bs. No bs. All right? You can actually book a phone call right on my calendar by going to talkwithscottcarson.com that's right. You can literally book a phone call and I will call you. I will call you and if you don't answer, I will text you. Hey, booked a call with me. Respect your time. Respect my time. Stop wasting your time. Stop wasting your energy shooting yourselves in the foot before you ever get around to it. And I'm seeing a lot of people do that in Facebook groups, on LinkedIn groups, and just doing stupid stuff that's shooting yourselves in the foot. So get signed up for our workshop. No buying for dummies dot com. Shoot me a text message. 512-585-3810. I'll send you the direct message. We still are offering discounted tickets to the upcoming workshop here so you can get in for 50% off. Good for you. Plus a partner or spouse at just under 500 bucks. Guys, it is one of the best bang for the bucks. A full day on how to find deals and and not sound like an idiot. A full day on how to raise capital, not look like an idiot. And day three, how to evaluate deals like a smarty, not a dummy. So take advantage of it, guys. Thank you so much. Have a great day. Take these 10 tips and change how you're doing business. There's nothing wrong with brokering deals. Just don't turn into a joker broker. We'll see you guys on top everybody. Bye Foreign investors.

If you have ever wanted to dive into the sexy side of real estate and become a note investor. And not just somebody that owner finances properties or buys and sells on terms, but somebody who's actually buying debt from lenders, mortgage bankers, hedge funds on distressed real estate on both residential and commercial properties, now is the perfect time. And guess what? We have our upcoming three day workshop here in just a few days. I on July 25th, 26th and 27th. That's right, that's a Friday, Saturday, Sunday. You can join me live on Zoom and our Note Buying for Dummies workshop. We'll go through the Fs of how to find fund and flip non performing notes at huge discounts without having to use your own money.

And we'll show you all the different.

Ways that you can make money being a note investor. Day one's all about how we find these deals from banks, hedge funds and how you can automate the process of connecting with these people and get tapes and listen to you over and over again. Day two is all about raising capital and marketing. We'll show you how to tap into thousands of IRA investors who are looking for deals to fund and how to communicate and how to contact them and get them to fund your deals. And day three is all about the flip the exit strategies putting deals together. We'll mix in due diligence. We'll mix in the marketing side along with the structure side. So much stuff in three days. Live on Zoom with yours truly, the note guy, Scott Carson.

Make sure you get signed up by.

Going to Note buying for dummies.com or click on the three day workshop tab on our workshop.

Get signed up today as we're still.

Running discounts and you too can soon become a note buyer.

Sam.