Turning Adversity into Opportunity – the Power of 'Why' in Business

Bernadine, thank you so much for joining me on today's episode. I'm excited. From the first time we met in a network, an online networking session, we got to work together with our marketing assessment and hearing your story. I knew it was a perfect fit to have you on the show to talk about what you've done, what you've been through, how you've overcome adversity and turned it into opportunity, all that great stuff. Thank you.

Thank you so much. I must say I've had the pleasure of working with Shaun too. So he's helped me quite a bit in my business, and I'm so grateful for attending the network event because it's given me such good connections that I am still using and I know I will use in the future. So who's Bernie? Accent, obviously. So I come from South Africa. The US has always been my dream country. I'm married. So when COVID happened, I call it now the reset. We were in restaurants. I've always been entrepreneurial, and we had a decision to make. We could have taken a humongous loan, restart there, or we could change, change where it is that we want to live and work. And we did that. So it took us about a year to figure that out. And it's so funny because land of opportunity, we arrived to the US with $200. After a whole year and a half of the process. And it's tough. It's tough when you lose everything. And I'm not going to harp too much on that. I'm going to focus more on the positive. And that is that if you put your mind to it, if you put in the work, anything is possible. You know this within marketing too. Sometimes it takes 90 days for something to really kick off or pop off, as they say. Sometimes it can take 6 months. There are companies out there that has taken sometimes 10 years before they have gotten to where they are. So the question that I always ask clients is, why? Why do you want a specific thing? My motivation was big for coming to the US. We transitioned into working for other people and not for ourselves. And I'm in the yacht industry with my husband. I'm a stewardess, he's a chef. But I always love doing stuff differently. I always love motivating, and I always get asked so many questions on, Bronnie, how do I start this business? How do I do this? I'm running this right now. Where do I start? So your motivation would be why? Because why will make sense when common sense doesn't. If you want your own business because you want to work from home, that is your why. If you want your own business because you want to travel more and have flexible hours, that is your why. We live in a time that is so tech-orientated that if you aren't already in the industry, you're going to be left behind in the coming future. This is your field and expertise. But knowing the why and understanding that it's going to take time and knowing that you're going to have to put in the work, those for me are realistic things. When we started our business, and you also mentioned on a previous conversation, we've got a publication company. So the first thing that my husband did is he opened up an LLC. We started a publication and I've got a gratitude journal. I'm busy working on one or two other projects, and my husband has got two books out. Why is this important? It's important because when you are determined to do something, you find a way. Hence, the why for me is I want passive income. Yachting isn't something I can do long term because it's so intensive on your body, your mind. There is an age limit to that career. So I want to create passive income. And how you do that is by utilizing what you're really good at and learning the skills that you need to develop that business idea or business model, so to say, if that's all making sense.

Absolutely. You gave us so much to unpack there, and I just want to go back to when you came to the US. You had $200, and it was a time to start over, the restart that was there. What were some— did you have any doubts or anything like that, that was this going to work, that type of stuff? Because I think a lot of business owners, especially ones that are either in a transition or they've been working a job and now they want to start a business, those doubts are there. Did you have any, and if so, how did you overcome it?

Doubts are there, they will always be there. And the process for us took about a year and a half, and I'm not going to focus too much on the yachting. We came here with a yachting contract, so we had work. We actually just arrived, we needed to obviously work for a month to get that paycheck in. And of course there was doubts. You in a different country, you need to figure out how things work over here, but at the same time I think for me, my why was so important that it didn't matter what comes my way. There is a saying that has always stuck with me, and that is, what you fear, you create. So I want you to think back to when you were a little kid and you started on your bicycle or bike or whatever you guys call it over here, because it's just the terminology. In the US, it's the terminology that gets us, and it takes a while, but once you understand it, then you're fine. Because we are raised on the British curriculum, whereas you guys are obviously American-based. So you start riding this bike and you fall a couple of times and you get back on and you get back off. So what happens when you don't ride your bike for 2 or 3 years? You don't lose that skill set. So for me, because the foundation of always being entrepreneurial, knowing that if you knock and hit at a rock and throw something, or you ram something into the same spot over and over, eventually something's going to happen. That is the same approach I take with everything. And if you think of big problems as simple as— I have a bike, it's something I never forget. But when you started, the joy of being able to ride the bike on your own is something that just stays with you. It's the excitement of it. When I think of something, I try and think of it now as if it's already happened, if that makes sense. Because the in-between of when you didn't know how to ride your bike, you never remember. When you're going through a tough time and you get through it, you don't remember the in-between. You just remember that I did it, I succeeded. So my advice to somebody that is feeling stuck right now today is that tomorrow you're going to be 2 or 3 steps further than you were yesterday. And when we were going through COVID and South Africa had a very harsh lockdown, I spoke to a friend and all she said was, Bernie, think of yourself a year from now. And it was so funny because she told me that I was the one that told her that. Because I'm like, wow, okay, that's so clever. And that is what we need to take the same approach with, whether it is a personal skill or financial situation that you're going through, that if you've already overcome all of these things, you can overcome the obstacle right now. COVID also taught us that we didn't need all of these unnecessary things. We didn't really need to go and eat out. We didn't need to spend exorbitant amount of money. I think everyone actually got very smart with how they then adapted.

Absolutely. Now, you had mentioned there, you said, you know, what you fear is what you create. And then you talked about the bicycle idea. And I think there's another part to that too. I remember when learning to drive, one of the things the instructor said is, where you look is where you go.. So if you're looking in the ditch while you're driving, you're naturally going to start to veer towards it. And I think you can take that in, in business as well, is if you're looking at yourself as not good enough, failing, that kind of stuff, or the, the fear of what if this doesn't work, that's where you're going to, to go. And I think that's exactly what you said there. Now, you also mentioned in the beginning that, that part of your product line was this gratitude journal that you created. Talk about that and your view on the importance of gratitude in the—

gratitude in business and daily life sounds very silly. It sounds silly when we talk about doing a gratitude journal because it's going to bring in more, because in your mind you think practically, how is writing down a bunch of stuff— because you need to write it down because this is for two reasons. Once you write it down, it affirms. Once you write it down, your subconscious mind registers that thought. And gratitude within my business has become so foundational, and that's why I created the journal, and that's why I made sure that it stayed— it's a very playful journal in terms of the COVID It is very easy to read. There's one little motivational quote in there, and what I do is every day I write 5 things that I'm grateful for today and 5 things that I'm grateful for in the future. In today's entry, strangely enough, I was just showing gratitude for the fact that I can connect with people from all over the world because I just spoke to my dad. And then for business-wise, I was showing gratitude for making 20 sales in a day. Once— and you said it perfectly— once I— once you put your eye on it, subconsciously Because again, your mind does not know the difference between imaginative and reality. If you continuously reinforce, even though that your current situation doesn't reflect where it is that you want to go, it will eventually come about. Gratitude is the reinforcement to see this is how much I actually have, and I always think about problem solving with maths or exam, an exam, a test. And let's just say the test is out of 30 and you got 20 out of 30. The natural approach is, oh my goodness, I failed the test. I was supposed to get 25, or whatever the case may be. But if you look at it from a point of view of, wow, I only needed 10 10 more marks to get the 30. That is where things change. And that's what gratitude does. Gratitude shows you what you already have to achieve what you still need to achieve. We are very hard on ourselves. We forget that when you are in the job that you are doing right now, you are good at it because you've been doing it for so long. And I think as humans, we are afraid of being students. We are afraid of not succeeding. At least that was for me. I was so afraid of messing up. I, one day I was fixating on what if I say something wrong on a podcast? And then I actually thought to myself, maybe it's relevant in the time that you're speaking about it. And if it does come up, you can simply just say, hi, I made a mistake there. And you can correct it. But again, is that what you fear you create basis of? I was coming from a place of, what if I fail, instead of going, it's always corrected. We can always correct things. And if you take that approach with gratitude together, gratitude shows you what you currently have. Then you reinforce what it is that you want. Which is why, again, that why is important. Why do you want the business? Because you want stability. You want the freedom that comes with having money. Money is a byproduct of what it is that you do. And if that byproduct is your passion and money is coming in, suddenly your life is better. Suddenly you can spend more time with your kids, or you can take your wife on vacation, or maybe you want to buy a Ferrari. I don't know what your why is. But once you have that and you then go and just show gratitude for what it is that you have, the car that you're driving now, treat it as if you have the Ferrari. Is it clean? Are you making sure it has oil in? Are you making sure that it gets serviced? Because a lot of times we look at people that have a lot and we don't realize that they need to maintain it. Mundane stuff, if that makes sense.

Absolutely. Now, part of your business model is you're helping clients achieve success with gratitude, turning the gratitude into strategic action. I like that part of it because when you're starting a business, it's— I have the passion, I know what I like, I know what I want, I need a strategy. And that's usually where it ends, comes out of somebody's mouth. I need a strategy to do it. But the fact that you have strategic action and taking action on it, uh, and, and I read a great quote today. It was on Instagram, and we'll get into Instagram in a second, uh, and it says, just reading about exercising isn't going to make it. I think it was—

I think it wasn't Gary Vee. I did— I think it's very—

I thought it was. It was something— I think it was something about push-ups though. I just— I Yeah, it was a great quote. Yeah, it was really good. So let's talk about the action that you take with getting content out there. And I know you are on Instagram and talk about that. What approach do you take to using Instagram to communicate with your audience? And were there any lessons that you've learned since doing it that's made it easier or better for you?

So many lessons. So many. Oh my goodness. We will need like a whole Another episode for that. But if I can see, firstly, I was afraid of Instagram for a long time. I had an account, I never posted, like, ever. I just had it and I was like stalking people, okay, checking what everyone else is doing. And then I realized, especially when I came to the US, that it can be a tool because suddenly I was taken away from South Africa and friends And then I realized that Instagram isn't just for personal usage, it's for business. And my first business model was motivational coaching, which I loved, and then it evolved into something else, and now it is business coaching. Why do I mention this? That is because we evolve. The more, the better you can make an informed decision and what I realize is that even with business, it is an extension of yourself. So when I post, and we always talk about ideal avatars, I list down who this person is. And now when I do content, I ask myself, is this something— and my ideal avatar's name, her name's Barbara— I'm like, is this something that Barbara would like? And if you're listening to this and you're going is Bernie crazy? I'm going to explain to you why, and then I'm going to answer your question. When you sell, the scariest thing for me was selling. I feel sleazy, you don't want to do it, and that was one of the main things I came to you for, was help with marketing and strategy too, but from a different level. So for me, I can take something that's super hard and intricate because I'm good at problem solving, I'm good at giving someone structure to their problems,. And when I do one-on-ones, I give them like a 3-week action plan that they can implement step by step. But at the same time, I was afraid of marketing. And then when I took the approach of, if I post this, will this talk to Barbara? Barbara being a wife, mother, maybe she's single or divorced. No, we need to niche it down, just wife. Barbara is a wife, maybe she's got a kid or two, I've got stepkids. I started creating content now from the person that I want to help, and that for me is, you are so overwhelmed with day-to-day life, you really want the business, but your family responsibilities and work is so much, you don't have the energy, you don't know how to do it. So if you look at Instagram as a whole, it has changed and evolved so much along with everyone else, but it's an extension of yourself, which is why I need to visualize my ideal client because the pie is so big. If you look at a pizza pie, and Dan Graziosi always refers to this as a pie so big, and if you just focus on that one 10%, one slice, you think it's a little, but when you look at the fact that the world is so global That 10% could be like 1.3 million people. That is your demographic in business. So you speak directly to that person, that one person. And who that one person is? You. It's you. I work in a very high-paced job. I am a wife, I'm a stepmother, and we travel a lot. So instead of making all the excuses in the world of why I cannot have my business, we go and we simplify things. So when you go on Instagram, you share something that you've overcome, you share a motivational video. And for the longest time, I didn't understand that by doing that, you're basically showing somebody, if I can do it, you can do it too. And that is where your sales and marketing part comes in, because when I started, I didn't know how to sell. That's why I laughed. I sucked at it. I had all of these leads, I had people coming to me, and I had no idea how to close them. Now I have a better understanding. Now, because I have that ideal avatar, I focus on my 10% of the pie. Because when I started, I wanted to help everyone, and you can't, Shaun. You absolutely, you can't. It was exhausting, it was draining. And you also figure out what works for you. I love watching people doing the transitional reel stuff. I can't— it takes so much energy for me that I'm like, nah, I try it and I go, nope, it's not happening.

Now you have an online course, it's called Zero to Launch. It says 30-day Instagram growth strategies for female life coaches.

Tell me about this program.

It's wonderful.

What is it? Thank you for bringing it up, ladies, gents. This is how we sell. You know, the end result is that if you want to make that side business, you need to be promoting your product. And for me, when I started out, there was no set way of doing things, so I took a lot of courses. I've worked with Jenna Kutcher, I've worked with Brené Burchard, Tony Robbins, Dean Graziosi, to name a few. There's like a few others. I did all of these courses because the one thing I was lacking was confidence and know-how. You spoke about that earlier. How does somebody actually start? And so many people started asking me for this, and that is where Zero to Launch came. I run you through How to Start on Instagram Implementing Bio. I help you with creating content, and you were speaking about content in there. I teach you how to batch, but batch your way. In there, I show you how you can use ChatGPT as a tool that helps you, and how to— the importance of email listing, the importance of how to promote yourself, making sure that you have a sort of content plan. Everyone starts differently. You can start by showing up maybe 3 days a week. You can start with maybe doing more lives. I train you in there how to do IG lives and use that to promote what it is that you want people to achieve. The bottom line is I want to help female online life coaches, women who are afraid of starting because they have no idea how to start. This is the plan. And yes, it runs 30 days, but you could do it over a few months if your schedule is too insane. But I make sure that the videos are super short. I think the longest one is like 7 minutes because let's face it, we're busy. But it is the guide that I wish I had when I started. So I did all of these courses and what I did is I condensed it into one. Once you're done with the course, you'll know how to do your content. You'll also understand how to do your first program, one-on-one or group coaching, whatever it is that you decide to do. You'll also learn the importance of email list building, like I mentioned, and thanks to you, I'm really focusing on that one at the moment. But it's going to help you get the confidence faster and it's going to help you grow your business faster. And with that, I have a private Facebook group where I will go in live and answer your questions monthly. I'll still help you because let's face it, when you started driving, could you have done it with just one lesson?

No, not well. May have survived. Yes.

Like, you wouldn't know all the rules. We wouldn't be able to do all of those things. Even though men are naturally good at the driving side, as women we take a while to get there. Some women— okay, ladies, some women, some of us learn faster than others. But the bottom line is that there needs to be a continuous help, support, and community, don't you think?

Absolutely. It's that ongoing piece that a lot of programs and a lot of people fail because they don't have that. Absolutely. So to find you online, your Instagram is probably the best place to go. That's— there's a link there. Your link on your profile is to your Zero to Launch program, and your handle is your_motivationalcoach. We'll put that with the show notes. Is there any last words of wisdom you'd like to leave our listeners with? Your favorite quote, something like that.

Favorite quote. And this is even— it's in the Bible. It's everywhere. It's global. It's international. And you might feel strange doing it at first, but if you don't ask, you don't get. And that is just— if you don't ask the question, there's no such thing as a silly question. If you don't ask for the help, Both of us are here, and if you need help, talk to either one of us. If we don't know how to do it, we'll know how to get you to somebody that knows how to do it. But that goes internal. Again, ask yourself why. What would be your dream business? What would be your dream day? And figure out every single day how to get yourself closer to that.

Great advice, Bernadine. Thank you so much for today.

Lovely.