Ep. 121 Build a Better Bridge

Hey there, Mark Brown. One of the critical pieces that a lot of people won't take the time to do and then, most importantly, don't even know to do. That's what we're here for. Create awareness. Is that all important? If you want to be unforgettable, it is our responsibility to build the bridge between our content and their world. And every time, the bridge is going to be different. Some bridges need to be longer, Some need to be kinder, some need to be more direct, some need to be stronger, some need to be different colors. But every time we're in front of a different audience, even for you and me and Toastmasters, you're in a different country, a different culture. The bridge should be a little different.

Yeah. And the thing is, if we can just find out there's some simple ways to build a bridge, and better yet, build a better bridge before you even hit the platform. Let's do this.

Anyone can give a presentation. Few deliver unforgettable presentations. What's the difference? You're about to find out. Welcome to the Unforgettable Presentations podcast with your hosts, world champion speakers and coaches, Mark Brown.

Mark Brown, your life tells a story and there's someone out there who needs to hear it.

And Darren Lacroix. And Darren Lacroix.

Stage time, Stage time. Stage time.

Ready for some powerful presentation. AHAs. Let's dive right in.

Building the bridge. Build a better bridge, have a better connection. You're more likely to be unforgettable.

Unforgettable.

Mark, I was at a Miracle Year keynote last year that.

Sorry, I know, I know.

So speaking for Miracle Year, and what was fascinating is it was here in Las Vegas. So I always go a day early. I wanna spend a day with them ahead of time. And that day, even though it seems like a long time for one hour speech, but you never know what nuggets you're going to get. And after the fact, I was getting some testimonial videos from some people and the event planner said we've never had a keynote speaker come in the day before and spend a whole day with us. So he noticed. But also I got some great nuggets them from their experience, from sitting in on other sessions to find that nugget to then bring it and connect it to their world, to my content.

Yeah. The thing is, we have to build that bridge and make that bridge, forge that bridge, craft that bridge. Because sometimes, and I don't mean to knock any other speaker, but you just said it yourself, the meeting planner was amazed that you came in early and very often speakers, we'll do two or three events back to back to back. We'll go in, deliver material, say goodbye on a plane, on a car, and we're somewhere else. And I don't want to knock that. However, I have Learned in over 25 years of doing this, Darren, that when we invest the time to build the bridge before we present, we make a connection that gives the audience a reason to listen more closely and they feel connected to us before we actually get on the platform. I'd love for us to spend a few minutes today, Darren, to discuss that's very informally, techniques you and I use and other speakers use to build that bridge, to establish what we call before rapport. Rapport with the audience before we even get on stage. If we apply these simple techniques, I can almost guarantee. Guarantee a better connection. Because you're building a better bridge.

Yeah, Mark, you don't even know this. This morning I had to get up at 6am Vegas time, and I was presenting to the UAE to Toastmasters in Abu Dhabi. I mean, they were from all over the Middle east. And I was just thinking about this concept, but I programmed myself to think of this concept. And I love doing this episode because I think it's almost reprogramming it. Bring it to the forefront. And hopefully if you're listening to this, you get what we're saying. Every audience is different. Your content may be primarily the same, but even if you say the same thing word for word, you should notice that if you feel connected to the audience, if it's 100 or 500 or a thousand, you should be at a different pace going along with them. Your pauses are gonna be different lengths if it's a hundred or if it's a thousand. Why? Because it's about that connection. So, Mark, this morning, it was random, but I looked. I went to grab my coffee and wake up a little bit, have my tea. I reached for a mug and I saw that I had a UAE mug from my last visit there, when I was there physically. So I brought the mug, I had my tea, and this morning I had tea because I was like, I'm decaf tea because I want to go back to bed before we record this podcast. Anyway, I held it up and said, you gave me this gift from my last visit. And there were smiles, there were claps there, and there were comments about that. But what did I just do? I helped build a bridge right there virtually with a coffee mug. You know, what is that? If you're speaking to a certain group In a certain city, what's that city known for? What could you do? What could you put on your monitor or in your background virtually? So there's ways to do it virtually as well. So, Mark, what's our are three ideas that they might need to consider.

Well, number one, it's a good idea to have conversations by interviewing people who are in your target audience. And that. I know, Darren, that was one of your big staples when you first began doing corporate comedy. I know you still do it, but you began doing corporate comedy programs.

I didn't have enough content back then. I had to make up for it using their content.

Yeah. And I recall we went to Ukraine together back in 2016. We must have had three video calls with that group, with the panel and the audience members to really understand what their business was like, who they are, where they're coming from, and to build that bridge from the USA to the Ukraine who are different demographic, different people, different culture. So many differences. But when, number one, you interview people in your target audience who are going to be in the room or on that video conference call that day, it can make a difference. And you have a couple of techniques that you apply in the interview process. Darren, please, please, please share them with our audience.

Well, you got to ask the right questions, number one. And by the way, if you're listening to this, we have touched on this in past episodes, but we want to devote a full episode just to building that bridge and creating that connection. So if you've heard a couple of these concepts before, we're just trying to go a little deeper because it's so important and it's asking the right questions. I want to know who's the matriarch. By the way, if you haven't listened to last week's episode, listen to Jane Atkinson. She kind of gave us a new twist on this, which is also part of the inspiration for doing a whole episode on this where she talked about getting ideas from the audience, getting stories from the audience that would help make your points. Now, I've done that, but I actually never actively dug for that in the interview asking. So let's just say if we're talking about recording yourself. So if I'm teaching presentation skills, I say you got to record yourself just using this as a for instance, whatever your content is, whatever your point of wisdom is, you could bring it up in. And I'm going to redo my interviews, adding this into it, because I think it's that important. Does anyone there believe in recording themselves? Are there any great stories in Your association about people who recorded themselves. So, Mark, if we were talking to Toastmasters, I would use the Jim Key story. I don't know if you remember that one, but Jim Key came up to me after he won the World Championship, the 2003 World Champion Jim Key, and he said, you know, the first time I heard about all the recordings you did in 2001, the next year I actually went and recorded myself. And then in 2003, I recorded myself and listened part two. And I'm like, and look what happened. Ta da. So if Jim Key, if I was, say, speaking in Dallas, everybody knows Jim Key. So now it's not just Darren saying you need to record yourself, but I have other evidence that is custom to that area or that audience or that industry that now I can pull in for this audience. Now if I'm somewhere else, people may or may not know about Jim Key, but if I'm in Dallas, everybody knows about Jim Key. So if it's a strong enough story, I could use it again. But what I'm saying is in your interview, you need to ask for certain points of wisdom and see if there's any stories that somebody might be able to talk to you about. I also asked for A list of 10 names and names and phone numbers. And I asked the event planner to let them know and get permission for me to call them. Otherwise they're like, who is this? What is this? I always want to know who's the matriarch of the association, who's the patriarch of the association, or if it's a company, you know, who are the characters, who, the cast of characters. But I'm looking for people with quote, unquote, good juice. If there's somebody who's always a pain in the butt, I do want to talk to them ahead of time because as Ed Tate taught us when we just did our mastering presentations, you can ask them for advice, then you can lift them up in the association in your keynote, and then they can't say anything about it because you just lifted them up. They can't be mean to you because you just use some of their content. But seriously asking questions, and I usually ask, because I'm trying to bridge from my content to their world, I usually ask, what are your pet peeves in the day to day industry? Not at the event, that's a different question. But what are your pet peeves as a entrepreneur? If they're entrepreneurs, accountant, if they're accountants, you know, if it's an accountant, it's maybe it's their employees. Maybe it's the clients never, you know, come in with a box of receipts on the last day and say, here.

Do my taxes day before tax day. Right?

Yeah. And that's, I bet that's common in their world. So if I know I'm speaking to a group of accountants, I know that's a hotspot that allows me to create that gap, bridge that gap to my content in their world. So again, matriarch, patriarch, looking for stories or examples from their world that can help make my points even stronger with that custom material. What are your pet peeves? What are your day to day frustrations? You know, what are your aspirations? So just asking now, now, pet peeves and frustrations may sound very similar. They are. But I'm almost jogging a different piece of the brain and I'll usually get different answers, even though it's almost the same question. And I know too, when I ask for 10 people, I get confirmation from them. I get permission. I know I'm only going to talk to four or five of them. That's just how the numbers work. So I'm not going to hound people, I'm just gonna call them that once. And when I speak to them, I say, you know, five to 10 minutes. And if we're rolling and it's at the 10 minute mark, I always stop and say, okay, it's been about 10 minutes, I promise it wouldn't be more than 10 minutes. Are you okay if we keep going or do you need to get back to work? So I'm asking permission. I always just wanna talk for five to ten minutes, not more. But if it's rolling and I've got good rapport and they're giving me good content, but I still need to honor their time. Cause that's what I said. So now in the moment, they can say, no, I got to get back to work. Or yeah, no problem. Either way, I'm taking notes. You know, when Mark, when you and I did it, we also recorded it so we could go back over it, right? And those can be gold. Because you're just looking for those little flecks of gold that can then brighten up your presentation. And those flecks become important cornerstones in your bridge.

And there's also one more benefit. I have found that it's also not only likely, but very likely that the individuals you speak with, when they get to know you, especially when they say, yeah, I got some more time for you, we'll add on five more minutes, they're telling you they're enjoying the Conversation. And what invariably happens is those individuals will tell their peers and other people they work with, oh, you got to hear the speaker. I met Darren Lacroix. This guy's really, really cool. And before you even say a word, what's happening is while you are building the bridge, guess what, You've just got somebody in the company to help you build a bridge. I'll say it again, you've just got somebody in the company to help you build that bridge. So the rapport is being established between you and the organization, the association, the company, the group, the school, the team, the Toastmasters district, whatever it may be, before you even begin to deliver your material. Because someone says, I spoke with him, I spoke with them or her. They're cool. I can't wait to hear what they have to say. So the interview process, the conversation gives you material you can apply, but it also lets them get an idea of your personality, your heart. For them and for me, the best part is they now know, hey, this speaker is not just coming to bring a back pocket speech out of a can, walk up, deliver it and walk away. They actually cared enough, they wanted to know enough to have a conversation with me. This is a speaker who wants to serve us, not just want to speak to us. And that right there is the best part of building a strong foundation for the bridge of connection between you and your audience.

So we really want to ask for the influencers. So make sure you understand what Mark was saying. You now have co builders, co workers. Why? Because after you get off the phone with them, they're going to be in a board meeting and they're going to talk to people and they're going to bring up that they spoke to you. Most presenters, most keynote speakers won't take the time. So just by doing that, you become original, unique and different. I also kind of end the conversation. Here's key. I end the conversation, I say, do you have any questions for me? And half the time they say, no, no, I don't. And I say, well, if you have any, please feel free to call me. But sometimes they'll ask a question back and get a little more, get a little more clarification. But I'm building that rapport with them. That's why I'm famous for the term before rapport. That's what we're talking about. Before rapport, creating rapport, before you even get to the event. And then Mark, at the very end, I always try and say, hey, I'm a middle aged, short, middle aged, bald guy with glasses. If you see me there, please say hello because they're going to know what I look like. I may or may not know what they look like. So you can also research them on LinkedIn before the conversation to have a little bit better conversation because now you know a little more of them.

Oh, I do that. I confess. I do that. Perfect. LinkedIn. Stalk him. After that conversation, I go to a meeting. And sometimes, you know, it's hard to miss a six foot tall, warheaded Jamaican guy who laughs ha ha ha ha ha. But having that LinkedIn connection, I can look across the room. I went to an event a few weeks ago and I went across the room and I saw someone, I said, yep, I knew them from their LinkedIn profile photograph and I can say, hi, how are you doing? It's as simple as that. But I want to go back to one thing you said and you talked about asking them questions. Not only are you building the bridge and getting an ally or a co builder, what you're also telling them is, hey, what you have to say is important to me as a presenter because let's be honest, as speakers, we work really hard. We plan our presentations, we rehearse it, we get our slides, we have it down pat, we rehearse and we're going to deliver our unforgettable presentation. And it may very well be unforgettable. However, when you add the dimension of interview, do you have any questions to me? You are telling them that their opinion, their perspective is important enough for you to call them, have a conversation with them with the goal of including that information in your presentation. And Jane Atkinson last week mentioned customizing as well. So you customize your presentation to include their story, their experience, their pet peeve, their, their frustrations, their triumphs, their successes, what they are going through. And we deliver that line and go, oh, he asked me about that. And again, it just strengthens that bond, that bridge of connection between you and the audience.

And why not? With permission, make sure you have permission. Use a quote from them and put it on a slide. Grab their picture from Facebook or LinkedIn and again with permission, and put them on the slide. Now, you changed one or two, two slides, yet you made a stronger bridge, especially for them. It's going to be unforgettable. And it also backs up that it's proof that you took the time, you did your homework, especially if you're building your career, if you're on the road, constant. Oh, wait, nobody's on the road constantly now.

Well, some of us are. Once in a While.

Once in a while. But if you're on the road constantly, okay, you might not have time to do as much. But what could you do? There's the question. What could you do to do some of this customizing?

Yeah, it could be a phone call while you're in the car. Yeah, on the Bluetooth. Of course, on a Bluetooth, not handheld.

And the other little thing I learned by accident along the way in my interview process is I always want to know. I want to talk to a couple people from the board of directors. Let's say it's an association or a business, the board of directors. But I also want to talk to some people who are on the front line. Because if, let's just say it's 90% of frontline people and then there's a few people in the board of directors. Well, the board of directors might have this, let's just say Pollyanna type perspective. And then the front line people, like that's not the real world. Well, I'm not going to be negative or mean or anything. I have to be careful. But I also, it helps me a lot to have that ammunition to understand that let's just say the frontline people hate the parking lot because it's too far away or something like that. So I'm not going to say people hate the parking lot, but I might find a way to work it in. But I have that frontline perspective now, if they're all entrepreneurs, it's not necessarily a frontline perspective, but I think you hear what I'm saying, don't just get the board's opinion, get some people who are in the trenches opinion because they are more of the commonality. But you also got to talk to the board, otherwise you'll look silly.

But you see the value having the interviews to help you build that bridge. Don't forget now that the individual you interview can become your co builder to make sure that rapport is established before you go on the platform. But then at some point you're going to be there, right? You're going to be there, you're going to be on the ground. And what can you do, Darren, when you're on the ground to build that bridge before you're gonna present? You said you go in there a day early. So what's that like for you? What do you do to make sure they can like you before you start to speak?

Well, if my schedule allows it, I'll even travel and be there an extra day because then I can get acclimated to the time zone. I can rest if I need to. So I'm better on game day. So I do it easily here in Vegas because that's why I live here. But on the road, I'll also do that. And most of the time, when I ask the event planner or the organizer, hey, is it okay to come in an extra day early to spend more time with you? They're not even worried about the hotel room budget. That's not even. They're like, oh, sure, by all means, we'll put it on the master account. Like, no big deal. But for me, it just gives me time, gives me confidence. I get to know the hotel. But what I also do, Mark, is I start taking notes as soon as I land, because let's just say it's in Greenville, North Carolina. Well, whatever airport I fly into, everyone else flew into, unless they're a local. So you have commonalities. What did you see? How could this connect? And looking around and they all saw the, you know, going into Chicago, there's the big bull in the middle of the airport. So what is it that in the middle of the airport that everyone saw? How do they travel over there? Are they all taking taxis? Are they taking Uber? Because a story could happen that, again, could be connected to my content. So we're always looking for that. But I think it to me, I wouldn't not do it that way unless my schedule didn't allow it. But I'm still. My little spidey senses are out. And then going back to. I know we're talking about on the ground, but one more critical question ahead of time. Are there any taboo topics are there that you got to ask that question? 90% of the time they'll say no. You know, just don't talk about sex or politics or something like that. You know, they'll say it jokingly. But one time I asked and they said, oh, yeah, glad you brought it up. Last year, our whole board of directors were in a plane crash and they all passed away. So if I even mentioned a fun little idea that happened at the airport or the plane, boy, what a rough ride it was in, I would have lost my whole audience. I would have stepped on a landmine, and the connection would be gone just because I didn't ask that question. That question is very important. And that one rare time that they give you something that's direct, and then if they don't, you always have that as your fallback. Well, I, you know, apologize for bringing up the airplane. But I did ask you ahead of time if there are Any taboo topics, you know, I mean, we never want to put it in anyone's face. But look, these are some of the details that happened once, happened once, happened once. But you get enough onces.

And they ask me how I know.

Right, Ask me how I know. Exactly.

But to that point, you know, it's also wise, we talked a little bit in the past about having a pre programmed questionnaire where you ask your client particular questions. Who's going to be the top dog? Who are what? Who are the execs are going to be there? What can we talk to them about that you can't? And you also ask, what can I avoid talking about? When you had that in a personal one on one conversation, it just shows again, your tender heart, your compassion, that you really want to serve them well. And when you deliver that kind of message, you're just building stronger bridges until you actually get to the location. And speaking of being on location, Darren, see on the ground, you get there a day early. If you can, you get to meet people. Sometimes I get to an event in time for the mixer, the night before, I'm on the following morning. And I have discovered that point number two would be when you're on the ground, have conversations, be personable and talk to people. I have a mantra, if you will, about being on the ground. Be interested, not interesting. Be interested, not interesting. Why do I say that? Because you are the guest speaker and yes, I'm sure there'll be those who want to be interested in you. But if in that period of time, the night before the mixer or the morning before your keynote, you were having conversations and showing interest in them, hopefully their first thought is, wow, this speaker is not about the ego. They really want to know what we're doing, what we're dealing with, how our lives are going. And they're asking me these questions, wow, they really do care. So not only have you had an ally, a co builder from the individual in the conversation, in the interview, you're actually creating co builders in the middle. The night before, in the morning conversation, in the hallway, you're actually having people say, you know what, I like where they're going, I like their attitude. I can't wait to hear what they have to say. And what happens is, invariably many members of your audience are anticipating your words, not just upon the bio in the program, because all of us put our best bio in the program, we know we do that. But when they have had that contact with you and heard you ask them about their work, their day, their year, what's happening in their office. Wow. Now they are saying, yeah, this person wants to be involved in what we're doing. I'm more willing to listen and adopt and accept the recommendations they make because they view you as the expert. First of all, so far you're an authority, but you are an authority who cares. And in my experience, if I encounter an authority who cares, I am that much more willing and eager to take into account what they say and to adopt and adapt the principles they share with me because they have seen me as the co builder in building that bridge of connection. Be interested. Not interesting. They'll hear about you in your speech. You learn about them before you begin.

Amen. And if you're a fellow introvert, the cool thing is, and I don't like going to the mixers. I really don't. It's not my thing. However, what's more important, the bridge to the audience. I'll do it for that reason. And after I speak, it's easy because then everybody knows me and I was the authority on stage, but before I had more of a challenge. So what I recommend is have a set list. Have a set list of questions, your standard questions that you ask. And in each little conversation you can use the same questions because it's a separate little one on one or two on one conversation. And one of the magical ideas I got from Patricia Fripp, our friend and co author. We should be talking about that too, Mark.

Yeah, right. We should. Yeah.

Patricia Fripp says, let's just say you're talking about presentation skills. So that's my topic. Sometimes ask the audience when you're doing one on one questions when you get there on the ground. What are some of your challenges as a manager giving presentations? What are your some challenges as an accountant giving presentations? What are some of your challenges as a sales rep doing outside presentations? You know, it's amazing that when I asked those questions, I would have never had those challenges because I don't give that kind of a presentation now. I would have a strategy or something to help them. But again, it goes back to one or two of those examples you can bring to the stage with you. You know, if somebody had a big fail, never, never share a fail from the stage without permission, by the way, but ask them what their challenge is related to your topic. That's a great one on one conversation, you know, and then you can also, you know, how long have you been in the association? Why did you join the association? I mean, they're basic, but yet they're important. And come up with your own little set list. Same thing for the interview we have in stagetime University for our business Mastery program. We have mentoring calls, but we also have our Get Paid to Speak program that everybody gets. That's a step by step process. And in it we give people those questions, those interview questions. So start a Word document and just evolve it. As new ideas come up, make sure you add in. Are there any taboo topics I should be aware of? Add in who's the matriarch, who's the patriarch. Add in what's the average age range, all of these things. But now you've got a little cheat sheet. But it's not cheating. It's getting the right content out. Without the right content, it's harder to bridge that gap. The other on the ground tip is go hang out near the registration desk and listen to what people are complaining about. Because there's frustrations in day to day in their industry. But then there's also event frustrations. You know, is the chicken cold? Is it a meeting room they can't find? Is, you know, there's always something. What are people complaining? But I don't try to butt in. I just listen, listen, listen. When I spoke at the Rio, there's a long hallway. You take a right turn to get from the hotel rooms to the meeting rooms, a long hallway, take a right turn, take another long hallway. And I was there for a company called Contours Express. And they're like curves. They're the competition of curves. I don't even know if contours or curves are still out there, but in today's term, orangetheory franchisees, I knew that would get a charge out of you. But they were all complaining about the long walk. So I said, hmm, how could I use that? And I created a joke that worked consistently that I use in a lot of, a lot of hotels now with long hallways. But the bottom line is I'm listening. I'm listening and listening. And one added advantage to be a middle aged bald guy. I blend. I blend. So people aren't afraid to. It's not like if Tony Robbins is walking down the hallway, it would change and people would say or wouldn't say, I just want to be the fly on the wall. So it's an asset in that situation.

Yeah, it's true. I know one of the things you said was you want to meet people and shake hands. I know, shake hands. Now with physical distancing and Covid and Omicron, people are cautious, but we are having live events and Hybrid events, back and forth. And the whole idea of having those conversations and finding out what their frustrations are is a good one. I went to an event in November a few weeks ago, my first live event in a long, long time. First live event. And it was interesting because they had set up the main room for in rounds. So every event in the main room was at a lunch event, a breakfast event or so it was all in rounds, but people were having conversations at tables, obviously. Well, I was going to be on on Thursday morning for breakfast, and I was there Wednesday after opening, opening session, where a different speaker was speaking, and give them their due. I don't want to project myself when someone else is in that spotlight. But I was. It was easy to kind of walk around, say, hi, how are you doing? I'm Mark. I'm from Georgia, you know. Oh, really good to meet you and just have conversations and hear people are thinking what they're saying. And what's interesting is I have a line I always use. Don't steal my line. But I told. They say, oh, I saw your picture. You are your speaker to Mark Brown. I said, yes. You know what? I just cannot wait to hear what I'm going to say tomorrow. And they all kind of laugh, but it kind of breaks some tension. I begin to have conversations. It opens the door, hey, I'm a regular guy. Let's talk. And before you know it, I'm hearing from them what's going on in their mind. What was it like to get to the convention? You know what the rooms are like. You kind of see the demographic. One particular group, they'll stay with their clique, or they'll stay with their clique. And you go to different tables, just have little conversations and having those small and short conversations, not heavy, not deep, but just having the rapport with the audience. If nothing else, I gave them the truth about who I am. I may be introverted, but when I'm in that venue, I'm easy to talk to. I'm open to hear what they have to say. And I'm practicing at my best, being interested, not just being interesting. When I say practicing, I don't mean it's a clinical rehearsal. I mean I'm putting into practice what I say. I'm genuinely showing interest in them. I even play a game with myself to try to remember the names of 10 people at one table and try to connect their name. Oh, oh. So see, you're Tony, like Tony Romo, right? Yeah, that's right. Tony Romo. It's a simple Little conversational tool, but by me trying to remember all their names and connect their name with somebody else. They're now making a new friend. And I haven't talked about my topic, my subject, what I will do the following day. Nothing like that. I'm simply building a bridge by establishing some kind of relationship, small though it may be, with the people in the room. And I'll do a little table hopping. I mean, I always want to do that. But I realized, hey, I have come so far to serve them. Who am I serving? Let me meet the people on the ground, not just the board member or the meeting panel. And it really has been powerful to help me to truly build that bridge and to understand them. And there's something else I began doing recently also. I would Google search the organization and then click on the news tab, what's in the news about them that I can talk about in conversation the day before or the morning of my presentation over breakfast when they show. Oh, you found out about that? Yeah, I did. I mean, not like surprise, surprise, but when I ask, hey, you know, I understand that so and so is going on. How do you feel about that? And believe it or not, people open up to you and they have the conversation. Oh, you knew about that? Yeah, I found out about that. Wow, that's our thing. But you know that it was simple. Google the organization, click News tab, and you'll see the last week or two what's been going on with that particular organization.

Brilliant. Brilliant. And one more thing you can ask on the ground is what stood out at the conference so far? Far, what stood out at the conference, good or bad? Again, we don't want to. We need to edify other presenters. We can't cut anybody down. That would be wrong. But we could lift up or if there was something said that was good at every. Or what was the best joke so far at the conference? I want to be able to tap into that juice because that helps build part of my bridge. So ask everybody. And what we're looking for is commonality. Oh, and Joe was up there. He talked about the difference between IQ and EQ or something like that. If it was funny, tap into that juice. That juice is there. It's common. But ask the question, what stood out in the conference? Or phrase it however you would. You want it to come out naturally, but you want to look for highlights because those are things that you can tie into, maybe even in your openings to cry. And boom, they did their homework. So if I can't be there on the ground, I'M going to do my research when I get on the ground to what happened in the conference so far.

Darren, really quickly remember being on the ground. Now, I know that many of us who are listening are not doing live events, maybe hybrid, but many are still doing virtual programs. And you and I have done several virtual programs for paying clients, corporate clients, and Toastmasters groups around the world. And what I find interesting is I'll be asked to do a Toastmasters program for a group in maybe Asia or in Europe. And they have 500 people who register for the event. They're going to show up in the morning or the afternoon or 4am for me, depending on what time it is. But I get to the Zoom Room, they're using Zoom for argument's sake, and you see 393 attendees are in the room, and it's 15 minutes early.

Wow.

Like, they're under, like, spouse. Cameron. Hey. Hey. Hey, guys. How you doing? It's what, 9:30 there? Oh, yeah, it's. It's 4:30am for me, and I'm. I'm bubbling. Y' all doing okay? And I begin to get the conversation going. Turn a few cameras on, I'll make a comment on somebody's background. I'll say, oh, is that your. Is that your granddaughter? What's her name? Oh, her name is, you know, Parity. Oh, that's so cute. How old is she? She's three. And before you know it, the Zoom Master is there, the host is there. We're having these conversations 15 minutes early, and the people who have heard about the guest speaker have actually gotten to meet the guest speaker. We're chatting back and forth very informally. And the funny thing is, I had to do a program for a group of what they call Gavaliers. If you're unfamiliar with Toastmasters, Toastmasters Gavel clubs are not your normal Toastmasters clubs. And when you say Gavel clubs, most times they'll say, oh, those are the kids between 11 and 18 years old. And I went to a World Gavel Club event. I was the guest speaker. And these kids come on and they want to talk to you and they want to chat with you. And the kids cannot teach us about building before rapport because I've been to some meetings online where I tune in 20 minutes early, and it's like, even though there are 85 people on the screen, I'm like, dude, just have a conversation. But in so doing, you show your audience. And I will confess, don't get me wrong here in the Toastmasters world, Darren and I are celebrities because we won the world championship a gazillion years ago, it's highly respected. But when they get to see you as a regular person and what you see or what you hear with us on the microphone is who we are every single day. When they see we are regular people who don't really want to be held in awe, have a chat, it relaxes them. They want to hear what you have to say, but they also see you as a regular human being and they feel, wow, I get to know them, I get to talk to them and that was really cool. But just going on a zoom early, opening the camera and mic, I look at people, I ask how to pronounce their name, I compliment them, I see the title. Just have those conversations, they get relaxed and they're that much more eager to hear you. And when time comes for Q and A or conversations, they feel that much more open to do that. That's been my experience. So we can build before rapport, we can build that better bridge virtually as well if we're just willing to be observant and have those simple conversations.

And one more quick idea. When I do the pre interviews, I usually do it about two weeks prior. So I tell the event planner I'm going to start calling people two weeks prior because I don't want my different keynotes to get in the way. And if something more relevant comes up the two weeks prior, I'm more likely to tap into it rather than doing a month or two months. So it helps me in my mind relieve the Catholic guilt that I'm doing my homework. But at the same time, it's a good time frame because it's going to take me about a week to some people I go back and forth with. But just to give people that idea two weeks out, I ask the event planner. I get permission ahead of time, but then I actually put it on my calendar. So I just booked a keynote speech this week, I put it on my calendar and then I put a two week prior calendar to start building my bridge. Mark Brown.

Yeah, One last thought. I know we talk about building that bridge before we actually get on the stage and much of our content will do that for you. But don't forget what Darren said. When you find their story, their quotation and put someone in that group's face on a slide. The bridge of connection is more powerful because you've elevated somebody who's in the ranks and hopefully not only the matriarch or patriarch, but somebody on the front line who's doing it every single day I did it with Boeing. I found out who somebody was and I talked about them. It was like, wow, he talked about her. And they really appreciate that. So the bridge need not be built only before you begin. You continue to strengthen that bridge in your presentation and by the time you're done they should feel as if they have gotten built a relationship with a presenter that puts them not as a man or woman who came in and gave a speech and left, but somebody who came in really enhance what they wanted to do. Fulfill your assignment, but hopefully build some relationships with them because you invested the time and the effort to build a better bridge.

Karen so check out if you haven't already, Jane Atkinson's episode last week, the one prior to this week and also you might like Douglas Krueger's episode. Mark, I don't know if you have any numbers handy.

Douglas episode 120 was Jane 120.

And Douglas tells a great story about how he memorized everybody's name in the audience and what a difference that made. It was a great story, a great example for exactly what we're talking about.

Mark Brown, episode 114 out carrying the competition with Douglas Krueger. So that was 114 and Jane Atkinson was number 120. Your epic keynote and career was Jane Atkinson. Listen, we hope you will begin or continue or improve your process of building better bridges. Building before rapport. Because we believe if you do this, you truly will be unforgettable. We'll see you next week.

See you then.

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