Ep. 219 Did You Know?

Hey there, Mark Brown. So I was at an event this weekend and there was someone up on stage and they told a story and they had some unforgettable elements in it and it could have been so much better. I actually pulled the guy aside, I was like, give me two minutes, give me two minutes. Showed him something he wasn't aware of. And I think if we want to be unforgettable, just like when I started working with you, Mark, you taught me some priths principles I was not aware of. And I think it's so important that this is our job. This is what you and I do for fun. We create awareness. So did you know? Okay.

Anyone can give a presentation. Few deliver unforgettable presentations. What's the difference? You're about to find out. Welcome to the unforgettable presentations podcasts with your hosts, world champion speakers and coaches, Mark Brown. Mark Brown.

Your life tells a story and there's someone out there who needs to hear it.

And Darren Lacroix. And Darren Lacroix.

Stage time, Stage time, Stage time.

Ready for some powerful presentation. Ahas, let's dive right in.

Now. If you've been listening to us for a long time, you know a lot of what we talk about and what we teach. But I love when a new fresh idea just happens to be. I'm like, oh, here's an idea, we gotta talk about this. And the gentleman who was doing the fundraising is a great organization who's doing great things in other countries. They help handle disasters, they come swoop in and give people supplies and what they need. And one of the things they do, and I don't want to name the organization because I don't want to call the gentleman out. So I'm a fan of the organization, but because it's a specific thing that just happened, I want to kind of keep anonymity because the example is real. It just happened. And he told this story of how they help people, especially single moms. And he said one of the things that they do. So here's Mark, here's my remembrance of story 1.0. If you're not aware, that's why you're here, that's why you're listening. Be a sponge. We want you to be a sponge so we can share these world class techniques, ideas that have taken us decades to figure out. He says, so I got there and I'm talking to this girl and she had been a single mom. And what the organization did was help them figure out what is their skill set and helps them start a business. So they can use their own skills inside the business. And this woman started a business reselling school supplies. And that was her thing. He sat down in front of her and he said, so how has this helped you, starting your own business? How has this helped you? And he said, she stood up, she straightened her back, she looked and said, now I feel like I can do anything. I was like, what a great line of dialogue. And he went on to talk about more about the organization, what they do and how they do it and how we can help. Got it. And then at the very end, he just said, oh, thanks, thanks for having me here. And they applauded. It was nice.

Whoa, no.

Come here. Give me two and a half minutes. And I literally got up and walked away and pulled him aside and dragged him outside. I'm like, look, you don't know me. Here's the thing about story. And when I found out his story, he was new to being on stage. He's usually a background guy, but because they were doing it this three different locations on the same day, they needed him to step up.

Right.

It was an interview format. So it was very casual. And look, he got the point across, the point was made. But he wasn't aware of a important story structure that Mark, you and I teach. We teach the structure of a whole presentation. We teach your structure of a story. In fact, we had a whole three day event last week.

Better story, better business. That's right.

Yeah, but what I wanted to do was sit him down and give him a whole schooling. But what I did do is I exchanged contact information. I said, let's talk. But I said real quick in the two minutes. And Mark, what did you think about the story? Like what could have been quickly and easily changed?

Well, rather than describe what someone did, you can do it. You can become the character, portray the character's actions, show us their emotion. Let's hear their words in their voice. So don't just tell us what happened. Take us to what happened. Put us in the scene so we can witness it to the point of almost experiencing it. And very often, Darren, you know, you know, people say, well, I put my left hand out and I put my right foot on. Don't. Just don't tell us what you did. Just. Just do it. Show it to us and give us the experience of being there. That was one quick observation based on what you described just now.

Yeah, and several things I said. Number one, I said, you need to name the characters. Mark, you and I teach this all the time. He wasn't aware he didn't know. So are you naming your characters? And he gave us a great line of dialogue that showed us after. But I said, we need to know where she was before when she came in after the disaster. So we need to name her. Her name was Maria. We need to name her, and then we need to let us know where she was emotionally. You know, she's devastated. She lost everything. So let us picture her, too. One of the other principles that we teach, a lot of people didn't know in storytelling that we need the name of the character. And it's super helpful to give us one specific visual detail to get us to picture the character. She walked in and she was looking at her feet. She wouldn't look up and make eye contact. So that way, at the end, when she does look them right in the eye, we see the transformation of the character, and what was she thinking? What was she feeling? Now, obviously, you want to tell the truth, and I don't have those answers, but I talked to this gentleman about it, because whether you're giving a presentation or in this case, you're raising money, you're fun. And one of my favorite stories is a woman from Safeness that I worked with, a CEO, and I work with her here, helped her, literally coached her in the story. Then she went out, she told the story at a fundraiser, and she said, the story is the important part of the ask, ask for money. And she said, after I used what Darren showed me, it was the most money we've ever raised. That was a lesson to me. I didn't know. I didn't know the. I was aware, but I didn't fully understand until she told me, as a CEO of this organization that fundraising, it's all about the story, and the character needs to be relatable. Mark, you had something?

Yeah, a couple of things. Lesson here is never discount the true value of a story. And the other was, you mentioned naming the character and show how she walked in. The principle behind that is, as an audience, we need to be able to connect emotionally with the character immediately. So the portrayal gives us. As Darren, you always say the most important part of the presentation is the thought process. When we are introduced to the character, what do we think? What do we feel? How do we connect emotionally? And the setup in the story, when we first meet the character, can be so powerful, because now we are leaning in to find out what happened. And secondly, you were correct, Darren. She had one significant line of dialogue. Now I feel I can do anything that becomes a punchline to the presentation. Because of your contributions, there are people like Maria who are now saying, now I feel I can do anything. He could use that line two or three different times in the presentation as, as exclamation points or as bookends. But the audience walks away knowing that their contribution can so transform these individuals lives and give them an air of invincibility. And the third thing is, you said, my third observation is what was she Give us the before and after. What was she like after the disaster? That rang in my head again. I had not heard that phrase for a long time. But as presenters and storytellers, the significance of after the disaster shows the contrast before and since. And contrast is a key component in the impact of storytelling. Look from whence they have come and look where they are now in context. Look where they have come from. Where they are now. Look where you have come from. Look where you can be if you use our techniques. Look where they have come from, look where they are now. Look what your contribution, your investment of time, effort, money can do for people where they were to where they can become. Look. Look where they were. Look where they are now. You're up, you're a parent, you work with children, young people, the influence you have over these young lives. Look where they have come from. Look where they're going. You could apply that principle of after the disaster in so many ways. It's a key component for effective storytelling. So those are my three quick observations. Yeah.

And again, a lot of people just aren't aware that there are some principles to follow. Now, once you get version 1.0 of a great story, now you can tweak it, you can personalize it, you can add your own flair. But now you can go back and test it to is that actually better? Did we add too much? Did we take out the wrong ideas? So what is it now? Another idea is that they said they help single moms now. Single moms got it. Important. But when we can use what's called a rooting principle from the movie story script world, a rooting principle, we can root for that underdog. Well, if I know that Maria had two kids, okay, but I knew her two kids were 2 and 6 years.

Old.

All of a sudden I want to help her more, I'm rooting more for her. So how can we root for that underdog? How can they be likable and personify? So it's not just single moms. We bring it down to specific, a specific single mom that we know the story of. And what was really cool is talking to this gentleman. Now here's one principle that I didn't even think of. He said, when they're trying to raise money, one of the things that is missing is they all have these stories that they use people in the organization. But here was the beautiful part which he did know that I didn't know. He said, here's the problem. If you're going to be raising money for this organization, you care about this organization, Mark, you'll love this. You need to go get your own story. So he sent them to other countries so they could be hands on the ground. And he said that every one of them came back with a personal story of someone that they helped. Now, as you and I say now, because of our own connection with that story. Just like when we use our own picture rather than cliche picture art.

Right, Right.

We're more connected to that story because we were there. We lit. We can relive it, we can re feel it, we can re experience it each time we tell it. And hey, maybe we'll even get a little choked up, which is just going to draw our audience in. But it's sincere, not manufactured.

Yeah. And the idea of using your story of your experience within the organization you're addressing can truly be powerful. We have often proclaimed the value and the power of a personal story. And the more your personal story connects you to the audience, that becomes that much more meaningful and powerful and that much more effective in conversation. Second, there's two layers there. One is your own story, but your own story that connects you to the organization just gives them greater buy in. And even you may not be as a presenter dealing with a fundraising organization, but you may have a personal connection to that particular audience. By all means, apply it. I'm not saying use it as in manipulate. No, apply your experience with the organization, with individuals within the organization. Tell stories of your own encounters. Tell stories. And there's one way that Darren continually inspires and encourages our students to do that is for an event, get there early. I know some people jam their calendars. When I first got started, I figured I'd go to every Toastmasters conference. I go to back to back events and I believe, Darren, you've done that too. I can recall going from New Jersey to Toronto the same weekend. Friday night in New Jersey, the afternoon in Toronto and Flyback Sunday. I thought, yeah, they're going to get to know me. I'm going to build my, my, my reach across the world. And I had the whole thing wrong. Mark, did you know that if you go in and actually spend time with the people and build relationships, you will serve them better. Well, in 1995 and 96, I did not know that. But when your story becomes intertwined with theirs, it's so much greater buy in. And they value what you have to say that much more. Did you know that, Derek and Mark.

Next week I would love to dive into creating that connection, creating that custom connection with that specific audience. And there's a lot of things that can go wrong. But I just did a keynote at Planet Hollywood in Vegas this week and learn some new lessons, some new. Even though I've been doing this for 20 years. So join us next week when we talk about connecting more deeply with individual audiences, even if it's kind of the same organization. But it's the people. It's the people. What do they see and observe? So join us next week for that. So, Mark, I want to step back for a second on this. Did you know when I started working with you in 2001, I was just kind of becoming that keynote speaker. Had done it part time. But when I started, let's say in Toastmasters, we heard the old adage, tell them what you're going to tell them. Tell them, tell them what you told them. Structure. And then as I evolved, I started hearing the Bill Gove concept, tell a story, make a point. Tell a story, make a point, Tell a story, make a point, which is very helpful and you can have some magic moments. But it wasn't until I learned Patricia Fripp's speech model from that deeper level and understanding. We talked about this a couple weeks ago. The absorbable factor, right, has to be digestible. And if it's not digestible, if we're kind of lost or we're not sure how it's all connected, well, we're, you're going to lose us. So I understood after 2001, I've been a speaker for seven years, that when I saw Patricia put up a visual at the Toastmasters convention, all of a sudden it all came together because I didn't know, I didn't know the importance of, of the presentation structure. So we're talking about the story structure, but I think it's that awareness that, look, if you're serious about being unforgettable, you've got to learn inside and out how to structure your presentation. You've also got to learn inside and out about your stories and what's missing, what needs to be, I don't know. Well, find out. Take another class. Join us, be a part of stage time. Because we teach this. These are all the things that I wish I knew for seven years when I was struggling. So that world class structure allows it to be absorbable. And as we always say, a great structure gives you confidence and it gives your audience clarity.

Clarity, that's right, clarity. I appreciate that so much, dad. Because like I said, we have talked about different kinds of structure before. But the idea of structure as a concept, it minimizes the likelihood of going off on a tangent or getting lost, as we say, in the weeds. And I know, you and I both know individuals who have as their badge of honor their expertise and skill at extemporaneous speaking, which is wonderful. But for a prepared presentation, if your preparation is. I'll go on stage. I know what I'm going to say. I'm going to figure it out. That may work very, very well for you. I'm not saying it does not. However, the likelihood of going off on a tangent, of finding an idea that you might want to add later on may take up time that would have been better spent following the plan you originally had, if you had one. And just think of the idea, even if you do want to be extemporaneous and spontaneous. I know someone who told me that when I first met him 23 years ago. It was very spontaneous. Even if you do have that style, if in your mind you have made up, you have structured your presentation to cover certain points in certain ways, having a proper structure will still serve you. We're not saying you must write out a 60 minute keynote within that particular structure for it to work. No, have the structure in place as long as you know where you're going to go. You won't sidetrack, you won't go off the beaten path, you will not detour. You'll still deliver value with your personal style and your personality with your extemporaneous methods. But a good structure will keep you on track no matter what style you may have as a presenter.

Did you know? So let's not be out in the field by yourself. Let's not. We've got it right. Let's not think we're good enough. Because that's. Man, that drives me crazy when people are good, but they're not eager to know more, they're not eager to serve their audience. I did a little part of. We had a speaker boot camp for our NSA Las Vegas chapter this weekend and Dr. Jeff McGee was running it. Oh my gosh, he's so brilliant, so smart. We gotta have him on the show.

Do it, man.

And listening to him, he's just got so much content getting it out there. But when I realized how eager this room of eight people, our academy, that they were all eager, they're all leaning forward and taking notes. I encourage you and inspire you, remind you that, look, if you've been doing this for a while, be a sponge again. Be a sponge again. Take one of your stories and get some feedback on it. Get some coaching on it. Because what gets exciting is I was watching my own demo video, and Michelle is looking at it, and she's like, he should really take out that part where you say thank you to everybody at Toastmasters. That's one thing. Everybody knows the people you're talking about, but most people don't. And I was like, you know, I've been showing that for 15, 20 years.

You're right.

You're right.

And that's Michelle. You're a business manager. Right.

I mean, it was brilliant. It was dead on. And now making the whole intro tighter makes it more grabbing and more emotional. I needed someone else to kind of point out and all do. All of us do.

Yeah. I stopped learning. I stopped living. Darren and I appreciate that. Even though we've been teaching this for 30 years almost, we still find ways to learn from our mentors. We still run our ideas, new ideas, past people who we trust, and that's important. And it's funny, you know, one may think, well, wait, Michelle works in business development, Right. But she's assessing your presentation, which means anybody on your team, anybody who's close to anybody, who's invested in your business, can help you and guide you. Did you know there are people on your team you may not even realize can help you? Yeah.

They've heard your stories 32,000 times, and they could probably bring up something that maybe you didn't know.

Well, I tell you what, I have one last did you know? Story. Because you know the story, dad. Back in 1995, when I was just starting out speaking and I found myself competing in Toastmasters, I was trying to find a way to inject humor into a presentation. I did not know then what I have learned in the last 30 years. But 28 years ago, I was going through this process, and I remember at one point my daughter, who must have been 10 or 11 years old, says, dad, your speech has no humor. It's no humor. It's not funny, Daddy. I'm like, whatever, 11 years will leave me alone. And at one point, I threw in a little corny I'm a dad joke kind of guy. So I threw In a very bad corny joke in my rehearsal, she happened to overhear. She says, daddy, that's funny, you gotta use that. I'm like this corny, cheesy. I have the worst dad jokes in the world to this day. My daughter's almost 40 years old, she rolls her eyes at my dad jokes. They bought me a dad joke book for Father's Day for goodness sake. As a joke, right? I said, baby, this is really corny, I shouldn't do it. God, daddy, it's funny, use it. Fine. I'm up against the wall, I leave line in there, I go deliver my speech, I get a 13 second laugh. A 13. No, no, Darren, you've been stand up, you get a three second laugh. It's a good laugh. You get eight seconds, you're rocking the house. 13 second laugh. I'm not funny. I'm a funny looking guy. I did not know that. Sometimes a different set of eyes and ears will see what you don't. And it'll help you to enhance your presentation. That's why we tell you to get qualified feedback on a presentation. Did you know a different pair of eyes and it may be younger eyes than yours can really help you with your presentation. It can help you with your story. Did you know?

Yeah. And here's. Let's see if you're courageous. Are you brave?

Oh, here we go.

Yeah, there's a tough one. Ask. Ask your best friends. People have seen you speak. Ask your staff if you have any. Ask your mastermind group.

Yep.

Say, hey, do you have any ideas on that signature story? Or my opening or my intro or any part. Ask them. And then here's the tough part. Shut up.

Listen.

Listen to what they say. Now they may not be coaches, but they are people who think and hear and have heard it many times. Consider what they're saying. Now, they may not be the person to help you how to fix it, but they can help you create awareness. Of what flat lines. It's boring. Of what sends their brain off on a tangent.

That's brilliant, Darren, because I've got to jump on this. That's brilliant. And I don't know if everyone caught this. There are individuals who will be able to identify an area of improvement but not have the experience, expertise to tell you how to improve it. But don't discount the value of being able to identify. Like I said, Thornfelt, that didn't quite work for me. But they can't tell you how to make it better. A qualified coach can give you both. So don't again don't devalue what they say, but understand the, for lack of a better term, the limitation to what they can do to help you change it. But at least let them help you identify where they may have seen those gaps and then work with someone qualified to fill that gap in. That's where good coaching comes in. Did you know? Well, now you do.

Next week.

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