Ep. 89 Why are you REALLY there?

Hey there, Mark Brown. Now, everyone who has heard me do the impression of the Mark Brown laugh. Mark, last week we sat down with Les Brown and you. Come on, you gotta do this. Mark Brown's version of the Les Brown laugh. Go ahead, Mark.

We never got a funny laugh. Little teeny weenies. Sorry, man.

Nice job. Nice job, Mark Brown. Mark, the reason we're bringing that up is because last week, Les Brown talked about customizing and giving the audience what they need. And then there's another interesting thing out of our new book, Unforgettable Presentations, Zig was asked, how many presentations do you have?

The great Zig Ziglar.

Anyone can give a presentation. Few deliver unforgettable presentations. What's the difference? You're about to find out. Welcome to the Unforgettable Presentations podcast with your hosts, world champion speakers and coaches, Mark Brown.

Mark Brown, your life tells a story, and there's someone out there who needs to hear it.

And Darren Lacroix. And Darren Lacroix.

Stage time. Stage time. Stage time.

Ready for some powerful presentation. AHAs. Let's dive right in.

So, Mark, as I'm working on the book, there's some great examples that Patricia brought to the book, and one of them was a conversation she had with Zig Ziglar. And Zig was asked, how many different presentations do you have? And his reply was, and I quote, I don't understand the question. I have 48 hours of content that I will pull from and organize into a speech for this audience.

That sounds to me like he's going to customize and make sure his audience gets not only what he has, but what they need at that time. And it kind of begs the question, Darren, as presenters, before we take the stage, we have to ask, why are you really there? I love what Les said last week. He said, don't let what you want to say is get in the way of what your audience needs to hear. Again, I want to thank Les again, because Les podcast last week has led us to really dig a little deeper into this conversation. Don't let what you want to say get in the way of what your audience needs to hear. So our question today for you, friends is, why are you really there? And to answer the question, we're going to break the rules by asking other questions to get as soon as process.

Yeah, we've got four questions to take you a little deeper, and we've got to think about this. Why are you really there? So ask yourself, why am I really there? And question number one, why did they really choose you why did they really choose you? And this is a question that honestly, you've got to ask the event planner, the person who chose you, that economic buyer, the person who's your event planner contact, We've got to have that conversation because sometimes we think this might be what they want, but they really hired us or chose us because of this. Well, it's our job because they saw something in us. Maybe it was in our demo video, maybe they were recommended from a friend or a colleague who saw us give a certain presentation, but we don't know which one and we don't know which audience, so we have to take the time. So the first two questions are in a conversation with the person who chose you. They chose you for a reason or a couple reasons. They liked you, they liked your style. But was it a certain story that was in your demo video that they said, ooh, our audience needs to hear that? Or maybe it's just a presentation that they saw that they were in the audience and they say, ooh, our audience needs to hear that. And you and I, we're known for signature stories, as are every great world class speaker we've ever had. And I could think they want my Mark Brown story and my stitches story, but they're like, no, no, no, no, we heard your valet story. And so I've got to bring that one. Because they know their audience. They're the one doing the choosing. They know their audience and what they need right now, our audience, whether it's a company or association, a gathering of some kind, why are they together? And then why did they choose us? So we can know and ask the question to find out, why did they really choose us?

And sometimes, let's be honest, meeting panels will have a list of potential presenters for their program and they may find very similar qualities. But having that conversation, sometimes your personality is the one thing that makes a difference. I know, Darren, in my experience, I've been competing, so to speak, for certain gigs. In one particular case, I remember this very vividly. I created a two minute introductory video. It was along the lines of, hey, Darren, this is Mark Brown here from Lazella, Georgia. I know you're considering me for your program on July 17th. I'd love to come and share these three ideas with your audience for this particular point in time. And I give a little background and I'm being Jamaican, came to America as a kid, but just a little background on me and why my message and my content is important for their audience at that event, at that time. And I did have an agent working with me on a particular project. And within a couple of weeks the agent contacted me and said, listen, Mark, you got the gig, they got your little video. And they said, after a video like that, it's an easy choice he the one we want. But I took the time to create a two minute video to introduce myself, say a little of my background, give a taste of what they would get, why they would get it and why it was important, get this why it was important to their audience at that time and for their event. So I had to be listening carefully to what they needed, realizing what I had would help them. And it helped me to understand why I would really be there. And they understood it as well. But it took the time for the conversation, for the preparation, and for giving them a taste of what they would receive. Which meant I had to find out what they needed. See, it's easy for you and me as speakers say, well, I've got this, let me bring that to the audience. And they're going to love it. But as you said, Darren, that may be not what they're looking for. We've got to find out first.

Yeah, I think what you also showed by customizing that little video beforehand while you're still in the running, that you care. So there's that underlying way that you're taking the time to go above and beyond. Well, guess what? That's what an event planner wants. They don't necessarily want unless there's some rock star speaker that's gonna help put butts in the room. They want the person who's a rock star and wants to help the audience, wants to connect to the audience and wants to know and care about what the event planner wants. Cause that's what the event planner wants is someone who cares, someone who's attached to the outcome. Because the event planner, their neck is on the line. They don't know. There's so many unknown factors to the event planner. They just assume a lot of us are professional, we'll do this and do that. That's why I told Jennifer Joseph Lear when she books me, I'm like, I wanna be your favorite. And then when I get to the event site, I tell the event planner, I wanna be your favorite. And I had one of them for when I was presenting for Wells Fargo. It was like Double tick. It was like a cartoon. Like what?

Double Take.

Wait a minute, wait, what do you mean? I don't understand. That doesn't compute because they haven't heard it before. So question number one is why did they really choose you. Question number two is related to that, but deeper. Now in that conversation, question number two is, what does the planner really want as the outcome? So that may or may not be related to why they chose you, but now we've got to take a conversation and go deeper. What do you want them to do, think, or feel after we present?

Darren, that is a key question, and I want to link that to the first question by telling a story. I think I may have told it before on the podcast, but I think it bears repeating. One of my early international gigs was in the Middle east, and I was one of two keynote presenters. Front end and back end, opener and closer. And at the end of the conference, the individual who had planned the event, we sat down to have dinner and he said, mark, we really, really appreciate your mess. So appropriate for us, what we needed. And you were our favorite. I said, well, I really appreciate that. How did the other person do? He said, well, they came from North America as well, but he said, we could tell that they brought a package speech that they had done before and they brought it with them and delivered it to us. However, your speech was right along the lines of our conference theme, and it really fit us better because the other speaker brought what they had to our event to give us their material. Going back to what Les said, don't let what you want to say get in the way of what they need to hear. And that particular planner was saying he was appreciating the fact that I was able to customize my program to match their conference theme. And all the content I gave was in line with the theme, so it served them well. And the outcome he desired was was a big win. And I don't say that to pat myself on the back. I say that to prove it took me work on the front end over here in North America to create this presentation using my stories, my anecdotes, my experience, customizing it. So when I went to the Middle east and gave that keynote, they said, yes, that is what we needed. You gave us what we really wanted. And it takes the time and the effort for us to understand not only what they want, but as you said, what is the outcome that they want. When they walk out of the room at the end of your program, how will they think differently? How will they act differently? How have you influenced them in a way that achieves an objective that the meeting planner had in the first place?

Yeah, they could hire us because of a certain story, because they want their audience inspired. Yet if the outcome, maybe they Want some strategies, some tactics, some how to. So it's almost like a keynote training or they just want you to set up the inspiration, bring all of your inspirational content. Because throughout the rest of the day, maybe there's that training how to specific. So they don't necessarily need you or want you to do that. But if I walk in trying to inspire, but they really wanted the how to's, the how to tell a better story, to give better presentations, I've got to know. And that comes only through the conversation and through the person who's bringing you in. Now, I also, Mark, as you know, do some audience interviews ahead of time. I'm there for the event planner. I want the outcome, but I also want the flavor of the audience. What are they feeling? What are they frustrated about now? So in that conversation, I'm just finding out where they're at so I can bridge my material. And Mark, I love what you did. When you know the conference theme, when we can bridge our content, it. It doesn't even have to be like you're creating a whole new presentation. You're just creating a few bridges so they can see how your Coming to America story not only inspired the movie by Eddie Murphy. Just kidding, just kidding. Just kidding. You're coming to America story can bridge to their new reality. The company had a challenge and now they're in a whole new world. Well, Mark Brown's story of coming to America when he was scared, didn't know he had his 40 bucks and he had his two suitcases and his big smile and his big laugh so you could tell him, hey, you got to bring your big smile and your big laugh. What are in your two suitcases? What are those skills and strategies that have worked before that you're going to bring into this new world? So it's our responsibility to help bridge that gap because they may not see it as clearly as we do. It's our job to spoon feed them and give them that entree, if you will.

Yeah. And real quickly, as you mentioned, we talked about what Zig said. I have 48 hours of good content, but he has to out pull from and organize into a speech for this audience. One of my most interesting customizing assignments was for insurance convention a few years ago in Chicago. And when I saw the program, I had to chuckle because they put a bio in the program description. Darren Lacroix will follow. Humor in the workplace, we get that, but that one, the context was reflecting on the week. Our closing keynote speaker, Mark Brown, will inspire us to go forward and Be our best. That was the gist of what was actually in the program. And the first three words were interesting. Reflecting on. So four words reflecting on the week. I went in early for the convention. I attended the general sessions, I went to breakouts, and I took notes of what all the other speakers were saying. I had to then incorporate four days of material into my existing keynote. I had to create slides the night before I spoke. But I was truly customizing in the moment because that is what they really needed for that particular program. And I got a 23 second video testimony from the conference committee chairperson. He said it was the best closing we've ever had. Mark inspired us to be our best. I'm gonna go home, I'm gonna hug my kids, and I'm going to do something better tomorrow. So the win was I accomplished the goal. They got what they wanted. He literally on video said it was the best closing they've ever had. But again, it went back to doing the work, finding out what does the meeting planner really need or really want for the outcome and putting the work in to meet that need. Because that is also why you are really there.

And I think taking that time to customize, especially if you're the closing presenter, to be at the event ahead of time. I went in for Miracle Ear when I was keynoting for them the day before.

I can't hear you. What you say. Oh, boy.

You're not sorry. Oh, forgive us. If you're listening to this, just forgive us. We're not perfect, but hopefully we're insightful and charming. But anyway, when I went in for a day early for Miracle Year, I got a testimonial just like you did, where the event planner said, oh my gosh, you came in and spent a day with us. Nobody's ever done that before. And it allowed me. It wasn't huge changes to my presentation. It was just a couple of great bridges. But then I could also say, well, yesterday when the CEO said, boom. What? Those bridges are the threads that connect you with your audience. And it might be the same exact content. And Mark, we kind of touched upon this already, but question number three of the four is, what is really your best content? So we've done a podcast episode before about your story file. So here we are, we have your story file and you might have your best content, but what is your really the best content for this audience in this situation with what they're going through that they really want, that they really need? So we've got to step back and evaluate it. We've got to look through our story file. You know, when was the last time you looked through your story file? When you are approaching a new event, Especially when you're approaching a new event, there's some stories in there. If you're building it like we teach, that you probably haven't even considered in a long time. But for this audience on this day, it doesn't even have to be a perfect story. But if it's the perfect story for them, it can be imperfect and yet be perfect.

And what's cool about that, Aaron, is I'm going to throw a little monkey wrench into the works here for a second. Here it is. Sometimes we say, okay, I've got new material. I got great stuff. Forgive me for saying the word stuff, but I'm quoting somebody. I got some great stuff. However, there is a word of caution that occurred to me just two seconds ago. Well, two minutes ago. Here it is. While we desire to give our audiences new, exciting and fresh material, sometimes they want that one little signature story that you're known for. See, as presenters, if we keep telling the same story over and over and over again, we get to a point, we can get to a point where we say, you know what? I've told that story over and over again. It's getting kind of old now. I got new experiences. I've got a new story. Last week, Les Brow said, mark, Darren, I got a new story. We figured, okay, we're going to use a new story. And we get through our program. And then the meeting planner says, hey, that was pretty good, Mark, but we were hoping you would tell us the story of your kids at the World Championship. You never told us that story. And that would have been a mistake on my part because I go back to question two. Did I ask what they really wanted? What did Lord, let's say, don't let what you want to say get in the way of what they need to hear. The key is go through that story file what have you not used for a long time? And maybe if, you know they want that one story you always tell, fine, leave it in. But what else do you have that can meet this audience's need that you haven't used before? Just yesterday, I did a program for a group in Sri Lanka, and I talked about leadership and the skills that we can use and learn through Toastmasters and how communication can really help. And I pulled out a story I hadn't told in a long time about me having to use my communication skills at a black tie event at the waldorf Astoria in 1996. I hadn't told that story in so long, but I realized in my note taking that was the perfect story to make that point at that time for that audience. A story I hadn't used in years. So heed Darren's advice, go back to your story file. What do I have in this file? Perhaps not used for a long time that would be most appropriate for this audience at this time. And for that purpose.

Yeah, you might even discover there's other stories in your story file you forgot about if you haven't looked at it in a while. And that's okay now, they're fresh, they're new. You're actually a different presenter now than you were back then. So you might even tell it differently or better. So in your process of working on doing your best, doing really your best for this audience, you might discover some of the gold in your old that you forgot about. That was two episodes ago. Two episodes. Check that one out for sure.

The gold and the old. That's right. You really have to find out what do I have? And this is part of the nitty gritty, the in the trenches work that comes from being unforgettable as a presenter. Please don't take lightly the work we as experienced pros still continue to do even after 2025 of presenting. I mean, Darren, you began towards what, 96, you began doing speaking, right? Looking at 30 years. Okay. I got involved in Toastmasters in 92 myself. So looking at almost 60 years between us of time doing this and we still have to go back to our story files. What stories do we have? What images can we pull up? What video did we. Did we record years ago that we can go bam. And use that in a way that really connects. I mean, Darren, you use an old photograph of your bookshelf with VHS videotapes and tell a story of what you went through building the business. I recall about used to punch out your own CD labels from your bedroom in your parents house when you were building your business. And that talks about the work you put in to begin to build a business. You don't tell that story very often, but I can envision you going back to that story to talk about the investment of blood, sweat and tears to start a business, to pursue your dream. That occurred to me as I began talking about this just now and I realized we have those stories, that content that may be from our high school days or early when we went to university, when we first got married, from different seasons in our life don't just look at what you currently have because you're in the moment. What you have from years ago may be perfect for this audience if you're willing to invest the time to ask the question, what content do I really have that can best serve this audience?

When you go through your story file, you're actually maybe going to even get some new ideas as you go through your old stories, because they're gonna trigger something that maybe happened recently. And you're like, oh, just like when you said that when you talked about my old CD stomper stomping, burning them in my CD burner in my laptop top. It reminded me of the first time I got a cassette dubbing machine. High speed dubbing machine. It did both sides. But I had it in my bedroom when I was still going for the dream and still had to live at home with mom and dad. And it was, you know, you press a button, it goes. And then you got to manually take one off and put one on. And that's when I hated the fact that I don't four cassette tape program. So I had to do four, four high speed dubs for one. But anyway, our point is that they're gonna trigger other stories when you go through it. So going through your own story file from time to time is gonna help make all of your presentations better. But as we're saying, please take the time. Because when you have that one moment on the stage, it's not just one moment, it's multiple moments. Because for each individual watching you present those people that were in the audience. When Mark got that great testimonial, well, he didn't just get that great testimonial. He touched lives. And all of those people could be potential people who recommend Mark because he took the time to make it unforgettable, because he was serious about his intent on why he was really there.

And there's one more point I want to make regarding the story file. Please don't miss this. You may go back to some old content, but the story comes to you in a new way because the experience you had since it first occurred has now shifted your perspective. You have gained wisdom, knowledge and experience. And you can take that old story and see a perspective you didn't see when it first happened. So there's again part of the whole golden the old piece. But just know I have something in me, something in my story file, something in my experience that can really support and serve this audience. And that's why I am really there.

Yeah, that was episode 87, the Gold in the Old. And then episode 88. Go check out Les Brown after this and see how close Mark came with his impression of his laugh.

I'm done. I'm done.

And, Mark, as we go through these four questions, I'm realizing they're all. They're all one question. They're different variations and designed to trigger different things and give us a structure for this presentation. But they're all really saying why really there. And if you want to make a career of this, every time you're on stage, you have that opportunity to influence. You don't know who's there. You don't know who knows who. Kevin Bacon, Degrees of Separation. That someone could recommend you to that right audience. But when you make it unforgettable, it's gonna have that ripple effect. So question number four. How do you really make it unforgettable? How do you really make it unforgettable? And first it just. The whole foundation comes from your intention. And then taking your skills, putting them in your backpack and bringing them with you. And like I do, taking the time to interview people ahead of time, being there on site ahead of time. Especially when the general session, if it's a big convention or a conference, you might not go to all the breakouts. You might pick up an idea or two from one of them. But now it isn't common to everyone because not everyone went to that breakout. But it still might be worth it. But everything, and especially those emotional moments, I really want to bring this up on this question. Tap in to those emotional moments that have occurred before you present. So if there is a big moment where one of the other presenters gets a big laugh, and let's say the joke was light switch, and that got a big laugh, well, if I can tie into them, especially like right up front in my beginning, they know, hey, this guy was here. He was in the audience listening. She was in the audience listening. And it makes that magic connection. So making it unforgettable can be that tapping in to those moments that happen for everyone that were emotions that were elicited that we can tap into now only if it's good or positive, emotionally happy. We don't want to tap into a negative one. Especially we don't want to throw anyone on the rug. We have to edify the other presenters. Never bs but we don't want to belabor or take down any other presenter. Hey, they could have had a bad day. They could have had an off day. We don't know. But it's our job to serve the event planner to Help lift them up. Now, Mark, if I can't get there the day before and spend the day before with them, here's one of the things Darren does. I will go around at dinner or in the cocktail party and ask people, hey, in the conference so far, what were the best moments for you? What were the highlights for you? Because. And then I'm looking for commonalities, right? If everyone says, oh, that light switch joke was hysterical, that light switch joke was hysterical. If I start hearing it, we're never looking for just that one because it might hit one person one way, but most of the audience other way. But if we find those commonalities, I even call it in when we teach the humor boot camp, the registration desk principle, I go to the registration desk and ask what people are complaining about. Those complaints are commonality. If they can't find room, whatever. Like, I was speaking in San antonio, Texas, and there was hacienda G. No one could find hacienda G. And it was, you know, all the events and the rooms were in one place, but they had another breakout session and there was no other room. So it was off the beaten path. So a lot of people couldn't find that certain room. So when I went up on stage now, I cleared this with the event planner. I said, look, they're already frustrated about this. Let me make light of it so I can relieve some of that tension. Rmt relieve my tension.

Yeah.

And so I went up on stage and said, I did my opening. That was a funny customized opening. And I said, and anyone looking for hassi and a G. And that's all I had to say. And it got this huge laugh. But then I tagged onto it. I said, you just go out that back doorway that says employees only. You go through the kitchen, out the back door, and at each one of these, I'm getting a laugh. I say, go down Crockett avenue about a mile and a half, take a left at the Alamo. And they were just rolling. But it started because I was relieving the tension of a negative moment. That's different from tapping into a positive moment, but again, different strategies. But I just want to offer this to people. Hey, check out thehumorbootcamp.com if you want to learn more of those strategies. But it's related to take the time to make it really unforgettable and that simple callback.

I often say, darren, one of my mark isms is callbacks create HAHAs and AHAs and you understand when you realize that we can make it unforgettable by calling back to a memory that everyone experiences and finding the ha ha. But there are also times you'll find the aha. It becomes clearer when you repeat a previous reference. You become unforgettable when the audience can see clearly that you. So yes, you are really there to deliver a message. You are there to give them an experience that says, okay, I can learn from this. Here are some tools I can use going forward. But don't discount the value of giving them the experience of having been there with you with the understanding that you as a presenter have invested the time, one, to create material that suits them and two, find out about them, what are their fears, their frustrations, their joys. And. And along with the Hassi and the G story, also the idea of who's being celebrated while they're there, who's getting rewarded for their length of service, who has done something wonderful that you can applaud them for. When you show the investment in them as an organization and their accomplishments, they're going to appreciate and respect the fact you didn't just come with a cookie cutter back pocket speech that you laid on him and then walked up the door. You become unforgettable by making them remember you, by how you treat them, how you respond to them, and by showing them how much you really care about them, where they are, their frustrations, their joys, but more importantly, the experience they have having been with you.

Yes, and in my interviews, I interview, I ask who's the matriarch, who's the patriarch, who are the people that everyone knows? And then if I can get a story from them, that's their story, that everyone knows that person, or 90% of them do. So that way I can say, you know, I spoke to Barbara ahead of time. You know, Barbara, da, da, da, da. And then I connect it. But then I tell a story from Barbara. So I take out one of my pieces of evidence and I insert Barbara's story because it's more directly related. And then also consider that one person in the audience, even if they don't know them, you could use them. Their story that represents everyone. So, Mark, you know this story. When I was in Taiwan, there was a young man named Howard. And Howard just went above and beyond, just like we're talking about here. He was working with this organization and he was doing interpreting for them as well as he did this amazing video that was like a promotional video for this convention, conference and organization. And he just went above and beyond. And the fact that he asked me for my slides ahead of Time in order to make his interpretation better for the audience. I was just impressed. Now, there was 500 people at this conference. There was 50 volunteers. So I thought, how can I best make it unforgettable? Not just for all the volunteers, because, look, we want to say yes. Have them stand up, give them applause. That's good, not bad. It's a positive thing. But it's not necessarily unforgettable. You know, no one will ever say, oh, I'll remember that moment when everyone stood up and applauded for everyone. You know, it's. Again, please do it. However, I wanted to make it special. So Howard was in the back of the room in the interpretation booth. I don't even know if that's what you call it. He has headsets on. Half the audience spoke the native language and not English, so he's interpreting for them. And in the middle of my keynote, I run to the back of the room, and people are like, what's going on here? Okay, so immediately it's making it more unforgettable. More unforgettable is a word making it unforgettable. Anyway, I'm back there, and I said to Howard, everyone heard me and saw me, that legally, you have to say whatever I say. And he said, yes. And he was turning beet red. And I said, howard rocks. And he just. Oh, it was just. He emoted. And he was in the booth. The audience roared. But I told the audience what he did and how much he put in. And then I took that and connected it to everyone's heart and people in this organization, how much they love and care about each other. And he's just a representation. But that. Because I ran to the back, but it came at the question mark. Question mark. I realized.

I just said, I heard that. I was gonna ignore you, but go ahead.

I couldn't. My bad. But it goes back to. I literally asked myself the question, how do I really make it unforgettable? And that gave me the idea, what if I run off stage, go and honor him as an important moment for everyone? But now it made it unforgettable.

Mark, you mentioned something earlier, and you blew by it. Darren. And I will not let you blow by this. It is too important. What you said is, I go. And again, the Howard stories are an example of how to make it an experience for the audience. When you give the audience an experience, that makes you unforgettable. But you said earlier, you'll go to an event, you'll find out who the matriarch is or the Patriarch is, you said, I will find their story. I will replace one of mine with one of theirs. I hope you caught that. What Darren said is part of the act of customizing, is sacrificing, if you want to use that word, one of his own stories for a better story of somebody within the organization that better serves them. He took up one of his own stories, inserted her story, and he said, that's why I'm really there. I am really there not to give them my expertise and my wisdom only, but to serve them in the best way possible. And Darren can pretty much guarantee, so what I did there, that when you sacrifice your own story for a story that directly affects and relates to the conflict team, to the organization, to the individuals who are there, that's what makes you memorable when you say less of me and more of them in order to better serve them, that's one way that you can really make your presentation unforgettable.

So, number one, why did they really choose you? What was the reason? What was the inciting incident? Was it a story from your demo or a recommendation or someone who hired you, brought you in because they watched you, they saw you, but what was the reason? Number two, what does the planner really want as an outcome? Even though they might have brought you in for this speech, do they want inspiration? Do they want motivation? Do they want your humor? So you bring in more of your humorous stories if that's the situation. But what do they really want as the outcome? The more you do that, the more you serve them, the more your career is going to grow, the more people you're going to help. Number three, what is really your best content? Take the time to look through your story file when you're speaking to a certain organization. This is going to be one moment, as Mark says, make it an experience. And then finally, question number four. How do you really make it unforgettable? Think of the Howard story from Taiwan. But how can you? Can you really make it unforgettable?

It's gonna take some work, but if you ask and answer these questions honestly, truthfully, and put the work in, this is how you will deliver unforgettable presentations.

Yeah. Check out last week's episode and see how Mark Brown did in his.

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