YouTube Channel: @dothethingformula

I do really believe 100% from every part of me that everyone has the capacity to be able to do the things that they want and not to be held back by the mental baggage that's in our head that we want to push through.

Welcome to the do the Thing podcast. In each episode, we get down and personal with people who go after the things they want to make all their wildest dreams come true. Join us as we unveil and dissect a formula for what it takes to do the thing. Here is your host, Stacy Lauren.

Hey everyone. Welcome to the do the Thing podcast. This is your host, Stacey Lauren. There's something truly magical about connecting with someone who has an innate curiosity about the world around them. Today's guest is a successful food blogger and writer with more than 17 years of online experience under her belt. She's dedicated herself to mindful living and food based wellness. Her well known website receives 8 million views and reaches over 500,000 unique visitors every month. Even more impressive, she built it all before social media was even a thought. She currently has two best selling books with her third book in the pipeline. She's also a regular contributor to the popular television shows the List in daytime. It's my pleasure to welcome the always curious founder of Steamy Kitchen, Jaden Ray.

Hey Jayden, welcome to the show. Oh my gosh. Hi. How are you, Stacy?

I am good. I am so glad that you were agreeable to come on.

Oh my goodness. Super excited to share with you and your listeners any type of advice that I have.

Yeah, that's great because I hear that you are a huge person that is doing the thing. So I'm excited.

Excited to get you to share your wisdom.

How about we start off with you.

Talking about your background and your story?

Oh sure. I have been food blogging for 17 years and that's a very, very long time to be one in a singular space. But also being in the online space. I started food blogging before Instagram was even born, before Pinterest was even born. So it's been a very, very long time. And in that time I've been able to see sort of like how things have evolved and how old things can come back again as it's been great to be so long in this industry and to stay with it. So there's a lot of grit involved and then also to just be a witness to all the beautiful things that have been blossoming in the online space.

Yeah, so that's amazing. So 17 years food blogging before even the social networks were out there.

Isn't that crazy?

What actually got you into that in the first place?

I was teaching cooking classes. What happened was I had just moved from San Francisco and I just had given birth. My body was raging with so many hormones and being so super emotional. Well, we had just moved from San Francisco, which is like culinary mecca, right? You can find any type of food in San Francisco. And then all the way down to a little tiny town in Florida. And I was at a restaurant called Bangkok Tokyo. And I was picking up my to go order, and at the corner of my eye, I saw this woman at the sushi bar, and she had the most beautiful outfit on. And she was on her cell phone and she said to her friend, like, hey, I'm having sushi at the Chinese restaurant. Why don't you come join us? And all of a sudden, my head just, like, snapped. I'm like, what? Wait, Bangkok Tokyo is not in China, number one. And why is someone having sushi in a restaurant called Bangkok Tokyo? Like, that doesn't even make sense, right? Like, in San Francisco, you would never have a restaurant named Bangkok Tokyo. It would either be, you know, Thai food or, you know, it would just. It was just weird to have so many, so much mishmashing in one restaurant. And so right then and there, I decided. Well, at first I got upset, and then I decided, you know what? I'm going to do something about this. And so I called the local cooking school and I said.

Can I teach you guys how the difference between Chinese food and Japanese food? And, yeah, that's how it all started. And I started documenting everything online. That's how Steamy Kitchen was born.

Wow. Okay, so it started off with you almost wanting to educate people on the differences, and then it sort of grew from there.

Yeah, it was part of. Part of it was absolutely education, but also the other part was like, I think I found my calling. Like, I'm meant to do this. All my life experiences that have happened, whether good or bad, and whether it's my life or anyone else's life is sort of like a little dot along the path, right? And things that happen happen for a purpose. And sometimes you don't know what the purpose is until way in the future. You're like, aha. That's why X, Y, and Z has happened. So I felt like this was just a very natural progression of everything that I've ever experienced and done. And I just started writing about food. And since then, I do a ton of television. I do live television for mostly morning shows or just lifestyle Shows we take life in my kitchen. And then I also written a couple of cookbooks. And my next book is around microdosing psychedelics, which is a whole nother field. Another brand new field for me. But like I said before, have happened in my life where, oh my gosh, now I know why these things have happened because here I am with a great opportunity to give back to the community.

Yeah, I love that. I love that we're going in this direction because having this podcast called you the thing, I think it could be easy to get construed that I'm always trying to convey to people to do the thing regardless of what the thing is. But something I've noticed in the episodes I've been doing, we've had some different people come on, like even experts. I had a holistic psychologist come on and brain expert and a somatic therapist. And what's really come out during that is I want people to be able to do the thing, but do it out of alignment for what's true to them, you know, and so I love that you're bringing that up because I think it's important to be able to tap into that more and follow that guide. And I was just wondering, what was that feeling like for you? How do you know that? Like, what was that distinction? How did you know that you were on that right path for what you wanted to do?

Well, I'll tell you this. A lot of people.

Make it very important to understand what their life purpose is. It's just such a big, heavy question. I think, especially Western society, we place so much emphasis on your life purpose. And that means like, oh my gosh, there's a singular life purpose that I'm supposed to be chasing or discovering. And it's such a heavy question with one big, heavy right answer, you know, quote, unquote, right answer. And instead of trying to discover what that my life purpose is, I rather ask myself, how can I live purposefully every single day versus a singular life purpose? So every day, how can I have purpose in what I'm doing? How can I live with intention? I have two. I have two life mottos. One is how can I create a magical moment right now for anybody, whether it's my loved one or a stranger or sometimes even myself, but it's more outwardly looking. So every morning, my purpose is to find, create magical moments for people. So that's one life purpose. And the other life purpose is more internal for me. And this is something I have tattooed on my arm. And it's simple pleasures. Deeply Felt that is the purpose of my life. And not one big answer. It's constantly asking myself these two questions. How can I create a magical moment? And how can I enjoy simple pleasures, deeply felt? And to me, that is so much more important than having a singular life purpose.

Yeah, that's unbelievable. And it's amazing when you can ask yourself that question because you get the answers. Actually you're getting me to think about. I had this, it was like a three month period where a really good friend of mine, we would, we would start off every day just saying, how can we create our dream day today?

Love it, love it, love it, love it. You know, there was, I think the website is called Psychology Today. There was a quote that I'm going to look for right now. Here it is. I'm gonna look for, I'm gonna read you this quote because I think this is, this is something that will really resonate with you and your readers. And like I mentioned, like Western society, we place so much, so much emphasis on finding a singular life purpose. But here's the quote from Psychology Today. One thing is clear. The conseque of not finding your purpose includes chronic, lingering dissatisfaction, an absence of inner peace, and a sense of not being fully in sync with your inner self. Now that's a quote from Psychology Today. And that is so freaking heavy. And it's kind of like, you mean if I don't find my singular life purpose, then I won't have inner peace and I can't be happy? So I want people to understand, like, you know, finding your thing in life doesn't mean that it's one thing. And it's not a singular answer. It's, it's more of, you know, how can being purposefully and being purposeful, purposeful in every day and living it with intention. I think you will, you know, in that moment you find your thing.

So I'm thinking about what you said earlier about how you went from teaching cooking classes to then, you know, educating people at the cooking school and then to you writing cookbooks and then now the microdosing psychedelic books. And I'm just wondering, it's kind of cool like when we're talking about this purpose driven stuff because it's been all different layers of things.

So yeah, it's been so many things. And I think that's what's great about it. You know, I, I consider my time like playtime, you know, in, in creating magical moments for myself. You know, I'm always seeking novelty. So I'm always seeking like my, you know, I'm so curious about things, and I approach everything and every day with so much curiosity. And when you are driven by curiosity, it leads you down something so many wonderful, you know, wonderful paths. And if you don't like it, you know, jump on another path. And I always tell people, you know, pick the good waves, just like surfers do. Like, they will wait and wait and wait until they find a great wave to catch. And if they don't like that wave or if that wave dies, they jump on another wave. And that's how I view my life.

Oh, that is good.

Really good. So, you know, pick the good waves. Pick good waves and jump off if it's not the right way.

Yeah, I love that. So how do you. How do you dissect what the good waves are?

I don't know. And it. Sometimes, you know, when you feel it and it's good energy and you're like. And you get some flow going. It's. It's kind of like that. It's really difficult to explain because my definition of flow is very different than other people's. When I think of flow, I think of like, energy adding energy to my life and that I can contribute back as well. It's not energy sucking. You know, there's some activities where it's completely energy sucking for me. Like driving. Driving. Driving a car is energy sucking because I am not good at it. But for someone else who loves adventure and who loves going on road trips, that is energy giving. So for every person, it is a little bit different. For me, specifically, it satisfies my curiosity. I get to learn something new that I've never learned before. But more importantly that I'm making connections. I'm always looking for connections, like this new thing that I'm learning. How can I connect it back to something that I've already mastered? And then maybe, you know, jamming the two together, I create this beautiful music that is so, you know, is brand new. And now I'm not just learning about something, but I'm also an agent in the creation of.

Yeah, the other thing I'm curious about is I mentioned that I was doing that Dream Day question with my friend and we had like, probably the best three months of our lives. Every day when we were doing that, the thing that you're doing with creating a magic, magical moment right now, you're not just thinking of you, you're thinking about others.

And I just wanted to talk a.

Little bit about that. Where did that even. Where did that even come from, that idea?

You know, I honestly can't tell you. I think sometimes, you know, when you keep, and keep a notebook and you start journaling things that work and make you happy and then you keep doing those things and things that don't serve me, I stop doing those things. So, you know, I always asking myself, what can I start doing? What should I stop doing? And then what can I keep doing? And that, you know, in my journaling practice that really helps because then all the energy giving and good feeling type of things that I'm doing can keep bubbling up in my day.

So I'm uncovering the formula for how you do the thing. So let's, let's see where we are right now. Okay. So curiosity, that's actually a parallel that has come up before. And it seems like I'm almost, I think I'm adding something to you because I've had curiosity before, but it's for things, right? Curiosity for. I mean, I talked to somebody, she was talking about cryptocurrency currency and having curiosity for that and what that opens up. So it sounds like you have that, but also curiosity for yourself too. And like adding that self reflective piece, I think is, is one of the pieces of your formula. Would you agree?

You know what, I'm gonna borrow something from a podcast that I was recently a guest on. Her name is Genesis. And she asked a question that was just so interesting to me. She asked what sparks you? What ignites you and what fuels you? And I'm gonna tell you, we've talked about all of these things in the past few minutes, but I'm gonna just revisit it and, and sort of categorize things. And I'm always big on metaphors because when you use a really good metaphor, you can visualize it, you can use more of your senses more than just, you know, hearing me speak. So I'm going to answer that question. What sparks me? Meaning like what I use? That's my curiosity section. That's. I'm seeking novelty is really what I'm doing. It's not just about being curious about something, but I want to seek novelty. I want to be curious about something new, something that I've never immersed myself in before. So I'm always looking for something new to be curious about. So that's seek novelty. That's what sparks me, that's what sparks my imagination, that's what sparks my happiness. Anytime I get bored, I'm going to go to look for seeking novelty in something. So, you know, that's such an important thing. The next one is what Ignites me. That's creating magical moments for other people. That's what ignites. That's what. That's what just, you know, starts the engine. That's what, you know, gets me going every single day. And then what fuels me, which is sustainable, is simple pleasures, deeply felt, and that's more internally looking and making sure that, you know, the wonderful things that happen that I just take. Take the moment to fully appreciate it and fully appreciate just the little things because it gets overlooked so often.

Yeah, definitely. So, yeah, those are great questions.

I love that. And then it sounds like you also, because you have a journaling practice, has.

That been helping you?

And when you do, the thing is that helping you kind of find your voice or your knowing?

I think for me, journaling is more of not forgetting. For me, the thing that has really, really helped me is microdosing psychedelics, which is why I'm writing a book on it. And now about 80% of my energy is focused on learning about psychedelics and how it enhances your focus and creativity. The moment that I've been microdosing for about a year now, and I do so many different extractions and experimentations and just studying about how microdosing psilocybin, which is some mushrooms, helps people be happy. And, you know, recent John Hopkins study found that psychedelics are four times more effective than SSRIs. And, you know, that's incredible. So, you know, every. Almost every day I. The microdose on mushrooms. And that has been the most massive game changer in my life. It gives me focus and groundedness. It's kind of like if you were a tree, you're growing deep, deep roots, that. That really help you stay grounded. And, you know, don't get me wrong, bad things still happen. You know, shitty things still happen in my life. But I've just noticed that with microdosing, I can flip it so quickly, I can turn it around so quickly and. And create good meaning out of it. And I really think that's the secret to life is it's not about just being happy or being more grateful. It's about taking the situations that happen, adversity that happens, and turning into a growing moment where you actually learn from it and then find the goodness in it.

So would you say then I feel like then the fact that you've been doing this for a year and now you're getting the opportunity to educate others in a way that maybe they haven't heard before, so then they're more open to it, is that that's Kind of your new.

That's.

That's where you're doing the thing right now.

Absolutely. Yeah. There is just so much transformation that happens when you do deep work. And I also think that, you know, with, you know, especially with magic mushrooms, it sort of creates connections in your brain and your body that you've never known before. So creating new connections and opening up new ideas and just allowing yourself just to be more open to accept new ideas. Like, you know, everyone always said, you don't know what you don't know. Right. And so, you know, with microdosing, it's given me the freedom to feel, you know, not indulge in. I guess here's the best way to get to put it. Microdosing mushrooms has given me the power to not indulge in fear or not indulge in rumination, you know, lamenting about the past. And instead I, you know, I walk a very wide path in the present lane, you know, the past, ruminating in the past. You know, once in a while, I'll still ruminate about the past because you can't help it. But generally, like, I can really, really walk in this very beautiful wide lane of the present lane and not worry too much about the future, which is expectation, and then not worry too much about the past, which is rumination. Yeah.

So what do you think throughout this has been the hardest thing for you?

Well, the hardest thing is that psychedelics are illegal. You know, mushroom cultivation of psychedelic mushrooms is illegal. So that's the hardest part, you know, is still being able to promote the, you know, the. The wonders of psychedelics without getting in trouble. That's. That's a very fine line.

Right.

Though, you know, these days, like, even Netflix has fantastic fungi, which I highly recommend anyone watch. It's a documentary about mushrooms and. Oh, my gosh, so beautifully, beautifully shot. Have you seen it, Stacey?

No, I haven't.

Oh, I highly recommend it. It's. The cinematography is gorgeous. So it's. It, you know, it's just something. Just such a treat to watch. And then on Hulu there was like, I think it's called Nine Perfect Strangers that was about psilocybin. And at the COVID of Newsweek a few ago had a whole story about magic mushrooms. So I think it's becoming more and more mainstream, kind of like what cannabis was maybe like 12, 12 years ago. And, you know, so people are starting to read about it more, people are more curious. But because it's still like an illegal substance, you can still get in trouble for it. I have a very fine Line to walk.

I was wondering too, just in regards to, just overall with you doing the thing, what do you think has been the hardest thing with you doing that?

You know, the hardest thing is, you know, not getting in the trap of fear and. Yeah. And ego. You know, I think I had this massive, massive psychedelic experience just recently, and it was a. With a very powerful substance. And.

In that. In that journey, I felt. I've never felt this before, Stacy. I. You know, it's so easy to say, you know, hashtag blessed and hashtag, I'm grateful. Right. But to actually really feel it in my heart, in my body, in my. In my cells, like during my trip, my journey, I. I imagine. Well, I don't know if it was. I say the word imagine, but I was in the cosmos, and I was in the swirling cosmos, and I was in the universe, and it was starry and beautiful and peaceful. In this journey, I felt all of a sudden the generations and generations and generations of women before me, my lineage, all their hardship and all of their pain, and all of the. All of the things that. All of them. All of it to create me. You know, that, Stacy, is so humbling and like, that magic that I felt, and it was almost like a deep knowing that was just the most profound experience that I've ever, ever, ever, ever experienced. And so when you ask me what's the hardest thing is that, you know, you don't. Is to kind of give in to fear. Because all the generations of women who's been through hardship did not, you know, did not. I'm sure they would want to see me flourish and succeed and. And for me to waste one day in fear and to stop doing something because I'm scared of it, or I got rejected or what if I fail? You know, that's. That would be such a shame because all these women had, you know, sacrificed just to create, you know, the being that is me.

Yeah. I think that's an unbelievable way to look at it. Right, right, right, Definitely. So, okay, let's just say you have one piece of advice to give to people on doing the thing.

What would it be?

Well, I think it's to be curious, to hold a space of loving and curiosity. I used to. Stacy, I've gone through all so much personal development. I was married to someone that used to work for Tony Robbins for, like, seven years and traveled the world with Tony and led big events. And there was one thing that Tony Robbins used to always teach, and it was to create rapport. You want to match and mirror somebody, especially when you first meet someone, and you kind of learn this in interview settings as well. Like, you, when you're in an in person interview, you kind of want to match and mirror, you know, the person interviewing you to develop instant rapport. So I became really good at it. And like, when I meet someone new, like, I would, you know, match their energy and mirror the energy so we can start vibrating at the same wavelength. But here's the problem with that. When you match a mirror and try to create rapport with someone, you're matching and mirroring their energy, and you don't know where they've been, you don't know what energy they're projecting and carrying. And so recently I started playing with, I'm not going to match a mirror anymore. I'm going to hold steady in my safe space, in my very loving and curious space, and I'm going to hold steady and be so strong in that I don't. I'm not. I am who I am. Right. Like, I'm strong and I'm rooted. And instead of trying to be who I want, I think you want me to be. You know what I mean? Does that make sense, Stacey?

Yeah, it definitely does.

Yeah. So, you know, my advice is to be, you know, hold a space of loving and curiosity. You know, it's. I always try so hard not to be judgmental and just be like, okay, I'm loving and curious and I wonder why, or I wonder why this person is saying these things, or I wonder why this point of view. And when you're, you know, when you're curious about things and you instead of holding and casting judgment, you are in more of a learning and absorbing space and, you know, beautiful things have happened from that space.

I think it's great that you went from, you know, having that experience when you were married and having him work for Tony, and then you learning all that and then you making the decision to actually try something new, too, and see how that feels.

Yeah. You know, I think that, you know, it's so, like I said before, it's so easy to say hashtag blessed, hashtag gratitude. But, you know, I think that gratitude and, and purpose are actions. It's something that you do and it's not a thing. So I'm going to say that again, like, especially gratitude. I think gratitude is a doing. That's why, you know, how do I create magical moments every day? Or how can I have simple pleasures, deeply felt? Those are actions. And I express gratitude by doing and appreciating. And it's a verb Not a noun.

Yeah. And you have to practice at it too.

You have to practice at it. And it's, you know, I always say body first, mind follows. So sometimes if you wait for your mind to change, if you wait for your mind to say, okay, it's time to go to the gym, Stacey, it's time to get in the car and go to the gym. If you wait for that moment, a lot of times it doesn't happen.

Right?

That moment doesn't happen. And, you know, to, you know, move your body, move your body first. Don't even make a decision about it. Just move your body. And it's not a decision that your mind makes, but it's just something that your body does. For example, brushing your teeth in the morning or before you go to bed, it's just something you do. You don't make a decision about it, you just do it.

Right.

Get your morning coffee. I have one cup of coffee in the morning. I don't even decide. I just do it. So sometimes in business, being scared of something or having fear of rejection or fear of, I don't know how to do this. Sometimes it just takes your body just going for it and your mind will catch up, up.

So do you think that's like a jumping in type of thing?

Yeah, you know, it's kind of like, you know, when you were a little kid, do you remember your first time riding a bike? Yes. You know, grown up, probably was holding on the back of your bike, you didn't and just said, go, you know, pedal, start pedaling, and then would let go. It's not like you were a little kid and read up on how to ride a bike. You know, what degree do you put your foot in your pedal? And you don't read about it, you just go for it and you do it. Also, you know, kind of saying with swimming as well, there's some basic rules, but generally move your body, get your body just to do it, don't make it a decision. Your body starts getting comfortable, just like riding your bike. Pretty soon you're like, hey, this isn't so bad. This bike riding thing is kind of easy. And then your mind develops the confidence. And then your mind goes, ah, okay, this is kind of fun. I think I can do this. So, you know, that's why I say body first, mind follows. Instead of trying to decide and depend on your mind to change first, and then, you know, your body moves afterwards. So it's kind of backwards.

Yeah, yeah. It's almost like you're putting the training wheels on by doing it. Exactly.

Yeah. And, you know, once you're in motion, things that stay in. Are in motion. Stay in motion. Right. So it's about getting in motion first.

Yeah. Okay. So is there anything that I didn't ask you that you wish I did ask you? You.

Oh, my goodness. I. I don't think so. I think a lot of people are curious about microdosing psychedelics to. To be happier, you know, or, you know, just to be more grounded or people want to get off their antidepressants and, you know, all of that information. I have a website. It's jadenrae.com J-A-E n r a e.com and on Instagram, I'm at both Steamy Kitchen, which is all my cooking stuff, and then, hey, Jade and Ray, for anything that has to do with microdosing and, yeah, I would love to share the magical world of psychedelics.

Well, thank you so much for coming on the show, and I appreciate you sharing all your wisdom. I'm gonna probably come up with my own. I might steal yours because the. Create a magical moment right now.

Of course. I would love anyone. You know what I always say, Stacy, is to try things on, like a superhero cape. So sometimes you'll hear something like, wow, I would love to adopt that in my life. Try it on just like a new pair of pants or, you know, a superhero cape. Try it on. See how it fits. And if it doesn't fit, take it off. If it does fit, you can customize it and kind of make it your own. So I love that. I really, really love that. Yeah.

That's wonderful. Well, thank you so much. It was wonderful getting a chance to talk to you.

Thank you.

Thanks for listening to the do the Thing podcast. We hope you enjoyed the show. But even more, we hope you'll be inspired to do the Thing. Do you have a burning question on Doing the Thing that you'd like answered? How about an inspiring do the Thing story of your own that you'd like to share? We'd love to hear all about it. Just leave us a voice message at do the thing.compaulcast co or email us at hello, do the thing podcast dot com.