FIREDANCE Live, March 25th

There's a record button. All this stuff interconnects. There's a very real sense in which the only things I teach to you guys are things that I've been using myself, usually for years. But I'll always test anything for at least six weeks before I'll even talk about it to people, at least as a recommendation. I sometimes will talk about things that I'm experimenting with at a particular time, but I try to make it very clear that it's just an experimentation and not a recommendation. Got somebody watching over there in the. On Facebook. That's great. So let me put my Facebook feed so that I can see any comments they come up there. Let's see. Say hi. All right, that's all good. That's all good. That's all good. That's all good. Let me take a breath. Wow, What a year 2023 has been so far. Amazing. Just amazing. And I hope everybody out there is having an amazing year, too, so far. Well, if you've been coming here and you've been doing your minimums, I can pretty much promise you that your year has been really interesting, but you got to do them. I'll be Getting started in 60 seconds. Be an hour long today because we have to. Tenon Reeve and I have to go and be part of a convention. We have to do have to head out to a convention in Anaheim. So. And then after that, after I get back, I am going to kick it for the rest of the day because I've set up my weekend so I don't get a full weekend off right now. So I have to make very. I have to be very, very careful to be. To be. To give myself the chance to recover and recuperate or else I'm going to crash and burn. And this is not something WonderCon. I think that that's what it is. Yes. Welcome to Fire Dance Live. I'm Stephen Barnes, a creative life writing. My partner and wifey person, Tananarive. Tananarive, are you ready to come on the air? I don't hear her. Tanari. Oh, well, I don't hear her, so I don't know where she is. But I will have to make sure to substitute for that. Anyway, we're both here and thank you very, very much for being here. This gathering is specifically experimenting with an approach called Fire Dance. Now, Fire Dance is specifically the utilization of TYP as a way to anchor your emotions and your intentions into your body. But you can also use, for instance, five Tibetans, which costs you nothing. Almost anybody if you can walk, you can probably do at least three repetitions of the Tibetans. And that's a perfectly good place to start because the point is to do is to figure out what the minimums are in terms of the three different aspects of your life that we want you playing with your body, your mind and your emotions, or your body, your emotions and your mind for an example. For a writer, the minimums might be five Tibetans done five minute miracle style. In other words, you do just a couple of. One of the five exercises once every three hours. So I might do number one at 9 o' clock in the morning, number two at noon, number three at 3 o', clock, number four and at 6 o', clock, and number five at 9 o'. Clock. So that takes care of the. Of the physical as a. As a. As a basic. Oh, there's Tananarif K. Unmute yourself, please.

I've been lurking.

You've been.

I've been letting people in.

Okay, Good, good, good, good, good, good. How are you today, sweetie?

Fantastic. I just finished a conversation with my best friend Lucina Fisher, who's a director. And it. We started out as reporters together, and it's just so great that we both ended up accidentally in the film industry. And she just got an offer from Netflix to get her short.

Fantastic.

You made our short Danger Word, by the way.

Yes, absolutely.

You haven't seen it. Audience, I'm going to www.dangerword.com dangerword film.com we sold that URL, remember?

That's true. We made some money off of that.

Yeah, we did.

Danger Word film dot com.

Yes.

So at any rate. So the point is, and this is what I want you doing is if you. If so, for a writer, the minimum physical might be the five Tibetans distributed during the day. Five minute miracle style. The emotional thing might be your morning ritual itself. That. In other words, that during the five Tibetans or during your first or during a morning walk, you are using affirmations. You're visualizing your mentors. You're flooding yourself with gratitude. Mentally, it would be doing a sentence a day, right? Just. Just one sentence a day. So that the total minimums that you have to do every day is 10 minutes, 20 minutes to get your entire day together. If you can define the minimum so that they're small enough that you look at that and say, there's no logical reason I can't do this, then when you find that you're not doing it, and you will find that you're not doing it, you absolutely will skip days. You get to just go in there and say, why did I skip that day? What happened? How did I get in my own way? So remember, the. The minimums need to be small enough that you can do them every day, okay? And I would say that, that, that minimum, you know, for a writer would be, you know, five Tibetans, five minute, miracle style, sentence a day, doing your fire dance, doing your morning ritual, whether you're doing it with tai chi or walking or whatever it is that you're doing to get yourself together, then what you do is, and I was just thinking about this today, that if you rate yourself from zero to nine, each of those three categories, body, emotions and mind, then every day you give yourself a score from 0 to 9 in each of the three categories, multiply the numbers against each other and put that number on your calendar. Then at the end of the week, you just look back and see what your numbers were. You know, as long as you don't. Because remember, if you miss out totally on any one of them, you get a zero for the day. So what you want to do is to avoid the dreaded zero. As long as you avoid a zero, I don't care if you get a one. I don't care. A one is fine. That means you actually thought about this stuff. You actually did a little bit. That means you wrote one sentence. That means you did just a couple of Tibetans, you know, a couple times during the day, but you didn't manage to do all five, you know. And in terms of your morning ritual, you did a little bit of it, but not as much as you. As you would have liked to. You still get a 1. You aim, of course, at trying to get a 7, 8 and 9. But the dreaded 0 is what you want to avoid at all costs. As long as you don't get a zero, you will eventually slowly begin to accelerate. You'll start saying, well, I'm not, you know, so I can get a 9 if I just write my sentence a day, you know, or however it is you calibrate that for yourself. I get a 9. Exercise if I'm doing five Tibetans five times a day for a total of just 25 little movements in a day. I can, you know, actually, I would. I personally would do. I would say 21 of each Tibetan gets me a 9. A paragraph, you know, or maybe a whole page gets me a nine, you know, in terms of my writing. But a single sentence gets me at least a one, okay? Gets me at least a one. And then in terms of my morning ritual. I'm going to spend at least five minutes feeling grateful and focusing on what it is I'm trying to accomplish and talking with at least one of my goals, which I may have reified into that the golden man idea. Maybe all I'm doing is I'm seeing the future self that I want to be and who just kind of look, look at me over his shoulder and say, follow me, young man, you know, whatever it is that I'm doing. Because you set this up so that it's kind of fun for you. Now, Cecil, you were talking to us just a little bit about what was happening for you with this concept of the minimums. Would you please. Would you please go back into that?

Yeah. So I was saying I had heard of life writing years ago when I was really trying to break into science fiction. I'd gotten some science fiction stories published on a small press. I've done some vanity stuff and I. With the writing, just science fiction, I never really made really that much money. All my money got eaten up, pretty much taking care of my kids. And before I. Before I did that, because I've always loved sci fi, I was a rapper in a. I was a rapper for a band. The band fell apart. So I pretty much had abandoned that. I didn't want my kids coming up in like a. It was. It had turned into a rap band. I didn't want my kids to get hit by the negative aspects of hip hop. Ended up happening anyway. But that's another story. But the thing is, so I'd heard of life writing and I finally had some. I had a company Christmas card gift thing I could give myself. So I bought a martial arts book and I bought a subscription on life. I was like, you know, I said I was going to do this years ago. I might as well just go ahead and try it out. It was something I was interested in. So writing the sentence a day and watching all the videos helped me just break in the flow like this when it came to writing presentations at work. Because I think I sent Steve an email one time saying, you know, the stuff that you've been talking about on Facebook sounds like really good team building stuff. So right now, I was responsible for building this software testing team. So I took the three gates, applied it to software testing the two basic questions, which is now I remember where I got that from. Those are the two questions I ask myself when I'm testing something. Who am I as a user on the system and what's true about what I'm trying To test.

Oh, God, that's beautiful. Beautiful.

And I shared that with the team. But the writing part, it was that. And there's another presentation. I haven't given them yet. It would have normally taken me three, four days to write those things. I did them like a day and a half a day, easy. The flow just came.

It was like.

It just fell right out in the PowerPoint.

See, so what we're talking about here is who are we really? I operate on the hypothesis that any goal you can hold in your mind continuously over time is something that you have the capacity to bring into your life. It's not. You know, I can't prove it one way or the other, but that is definitely the. The position that I come from. The implication being that there is much more within us than we ordinarily allow ourselves to. To use. When you said you could just flow, that means you were just getting out of your way. That flowing simply means that you showed up. You were there. You were not watching yourself. You were just doing it. Okay. And getting out of your own way to show up and be who it is that you are. I don't care if it's with your family. I don't care with your body in the gym. I don't care whether it's at work. I don't care whether it's with your writing. Just show up who you really. I mean, what if. What if who you are is enough? I mean, wouldn't that be a unique thing if it turned out that we are is enough, that we don't have to be something else, do something else? In some ways, you don't even have to learn anything new. You simply have to use what you already know, unfortunately, because the only real tool we have is words. I have to talk about various structures. But ultimately, you have to do this stuff, and you have to do the minimums. If you're sitting there thinking that it's going to change you by thinking with concepts doesn't work. But if the concepts and if my energy can help motivate you to do something, now you're in the game. Now you're in the game. And now you can say, I did this, and this is what I experienced, or I did this, and this is what I experienced, and now we can work together as long as it's just bouncing around inside your head. You know, that's. That's interesting. But no matter how thoroughly I describe a hamburger to you, it doesn't beat that first bite of five guys or whatever it is that you like. You Know, it's the description of the thing. The map is not the territory. The description of the thing is not the thing. Good for you, Cecil. By actually doing the minimum, you placed yourself in the arena, you found out, and now you know. So if you, if you said, if I do one sentence, I get a one for that day. No, zero, I get a one. I'm going to do the Five Tibetans. I'm going to practice Tai Chi. You know, I'm not going to lie to you and say that you have to do Tai Chi to do this. You don't. I love it if you do, and I'd love it if you trained with us in that sense. But the five Tibetans work great. Going for walks, taking care of your body, do the morning ritual, Bring your body, your mind and your emotions all together in the same place, just for a few seconds. It's the same thing that when you do, when you did your sentence a day, or you do the minimum of your movement, or you do the minimum, emotional focusing, you're stepping into a different world. There is a world of difference between the person who does the minimum and the person who does nothing. That's the switch. That's the switch. Once you get to a one, if you can get to a one in all three of these categories, you are in a different world and it's just beginning. But you're fine. You're actually doing the job. So congratulations, Cecil. Thank you for sharing that with us. So listen, everybody, unmute and say hello to everybody, because I think that that's part of this, just kind of saying hello to the community.

Hi, everybody.

Hi, everybody.

Happy Saturday.

Hi, everybody.

Okay, good to hear you. It's great to see, you know, so you know, who has a story to tell about the last week of work, especially engaging with this stuff, whether you've been able to get a one every day by doing your absolute minimums or whether you found yourself zeroing out. You know, if you, if anyone wants to be courageous enough, will be kind enough and smart enough, wise enough and giving enough to share a zero story with us. Suzanne, tell us about a zero.

So this time of year at my church we have the oratorical festival. And the two girls who won did their speech on Sunday. And one of them, she had a source, like either a video or something, and she said that self care is like having a car. If you don't have any gas in your tank, you can't drive somewhere to help a friend. Well, hot damn. Yeah, exactly. I'm like in tears. Parents Speeches. I was, I was done. I was just done.

Talk to us, talk to me about that a little bit. Why were you in tears, sweetheart?

Because I don't do self care. I mean I do a little bit of self care. I get my nails done regular. I had them done this week. See, they're pretty, they're lovely. But I don't do the amount of self care that I should. And I don't like a lot of times when my. I have my alarms for the breathing and then I just hit. I don't do it like I just hit. I'm do. I'm in the middle of my day, I'm doing something and I don't take that minute.

Okay.

And I don't do like I'm putting meals on the table. It's just we're child free. I'm putting meals on the table, laundry's getting done, but that's like it.

Okay, so what we need to do, I need you to commit that for the next week you're going to get at least a one.

I can do that.

Just a tiny bit of self care. I mean just a little bit. I mean I'm as serious as I could possibly be. You deserve it. You deserve it. I want you to live in the possibility that you absolutely are as beautiful and as precious as the stars. We're made of the same substance of the stars. Halfway between infinity and nothingness. All there is is our love for each other and our love for ourselves. That little girl inside you who started this journey called life, you are now her mother. And it is your job to show her that you love her 100% and you will fight for her. And so it's like just. Just a tiny bit. If you just do a tiny bit, just one step and you come back next Saturday and you tell us about how you got to doing a one that you did just a little bit of fire dance. Just in chanting your affirmations. You did just a couple of Tibetans just. You were only able to do three of each of them. But that's a win. That's a major win.

Major.

It's beautiful out. I'll go walk. And I'm. The Tibetans and I are not friends.

Okay, that's fair. That's fair enough.

The Tibetans end up with me face planted in the carpet.

We do not want that. We do not want that. So walking. Walking is fine. You know, if I suggest that you might want to look for a. Some simple yoga somewhere that you can do find a teacher, you know, a woman over 50 who will listen to you and create a little tiny mini program for you.

And the other thing I do, since I've paid for it, is the fire dance tai chi. That would be helpful.

Oh, fantastic.

Paying you monthly to do it.

I know, I know. I, I guess.

Which is not about you.

It.

That's about.

Yeah, but it's, it's. I want to be absolutely certain that people know that, that this, that I'm giving you is not about trying to put money in my pocket. Although I love putting money in my pocket. It is that if you're doing the finance tai chi. So how many moves you're up to?

Yeah. Breathing and doing the hands up and down. Seriously.

Okay, that's. But that's the whole thing. That, that, that if you will just do that. That's a one.

It is.

You get in there by doing the one. That's fine. And if you can, if, when you, if you have a calendar and you just, you just put down, you know, you say, I, I had a five in. In body and I had a three in emotions. I had a six in mind. You multiply them by put the number on the calendar, just make sure. And then you can just take a quick look at a week. I didn't get a zero.

Great.

No zeros. Great. Look at the whole month. No zeros. I can promise you, if you will do this for 60 days, if you can get 60 days without a zero, you're going to change your life.

It's like we use my fitness pal to track calories.

Yeah.

And I'm at 785 days.

Congratulations.

So it's been almost two years, so congratulations. If I can do that, I can totally count my magic every day.

That's absolutely can. Fantastic. Thank you for sharing with us. And who else had their hand up, wanted to share a zero? Who else had a zero to share? Anybody? Okay. Tom.

They came to a realization a while ago that if I can learn something by reading about it, I'll do it. But somewhere in my life in the last 20 or 30 years, I've stopped learning by doing. And that's one of the points of failure for my, for my firewall program and for.

So tell me, so what comes up? So let's say today you got up and instead of doing what you'd committed to do, you did what?

Actually, I did what I, I did some breathing exercises, but not as much. Not. I mean, I could have gone on.

Yeah, well, you could always go on. So this week, did you get a zero on any Day.

Oh, sure.

Okay, so what did you do instead of doing your minimums?

Got up, went and relieved myself, got some coffee, read the news.

Okay, so my. Here's what I suggest. You want to do your basics before you read the news, before you engage with the outside world. Take care of yourself before if. Before you check your email, before you answer the phone, before you look at the news. Take care of yourself. You are the most important part of it. If you don't do that, you end up being controlled by other people's agendas. What is your agenda? What does Tom want? Who is Tom in the matter of his life? At least spend five minutes connecting with yourself before you give the other 23 hours in 55 minutes to the world you owe yourself.

I also realized this week I kind of lost track of. I kind of lost all my goals.

Okay, so your first goal is to clarify your goals. Very simple. That's your first goal. So what? In order for you to get at least a one today, I want you to say out loud, my first goal is to clarify my goals. Say it.

My first goal is to clarify my goals.

There you go. Now you got it. You got a one. You stayed out of this. Zero. That's all you have to do. If your goal is to clarify your goals. And you now spend just a few minutes, you know, as a general thing with your body, you might say, you know, double your energy in terms of your money, increase your income by 50% in terms of your heart. You want to do your morning ritual every day. Why do we feel so guilty about self care? Because we don't love ourselves as much as we love other people. We feel that giving ourselves away to other people is the way we earn love. So what you have to do is you have to turn that around and start by giving yourself love. And then what you give other people is an expression. You give to them from your overflow. You fill your own cup. And then you. You give to them from the cup that you have filled. By doing that, you're not just giving them love, but you're teaching them how to love themselves, which is the greatest gift you can give them. Okay, Clarissa has her hands up. Hello, Clarissa.

Hello. I think I have something that's in between something you said and something Cecil said. So this past year I have been. I mean, I've been a teacher for a long time, but for some reason teaching and public speaking are very different for me psychologically. Like, I have no fear around teaching and public speaking has terrified me this past year because it's new. And there are a lot of reasons that I've talked about my fear in here before. So I came to you, to this group maybe two weeks ago, knowing that I had some dates coming up for speaking. And I asked you, because I team many things with you speaking in them. And I asked, what do you, when you go up to a podium, like, what. What are your guiding ideas? And you told me, and I was expecting, of course, my area is writing. And so I'm talking about writing. And I thought you were going to say something brilliant about the craft of writing. And this is. But you were like, identify a person in the audience and get up there. Like you got up this morning to serve them, to save their life. You said something like that. And so I have a mentor in the discipline. And I went to him because I grappled with that. I didn't blow it off. I really, I really wanted to operationalize what you told me to do because I thought the service in those instructions was where I want my heart to be calibrated to. So I took it to my mentor in this conversation and I said, you know, I told him what you said, and he was just like, you know, he met me when I first started and I was a very, a very broken professional. Like, imposter syndrome is an understatement. And I, you know, and he's watched me grow, right? And these are his observations. And he said, you know, who that person should be? You should be talking to the you that you were at the beginning of this journey, if you were sitting in that audience when you first got here, whether it was a graduate student, whether it was. There were so many things. What did you need to hear? And I was like. Because that was one of the constraints, I don't know the people in the audience, and I really want to do what Stephen said. And that helped me so much because I got to a point point where I believe I was about to, in the preparation of this, I was going to do what I usually do, which is overthink, over, prepare, talk myself into this space of not good enough. Because this five hours of presentation for this 45 minute talk is about to self destruct. And then all of a sudden, it wasn't about me anymore. You know, it was about serving, you know, this person in the audience. So, and that was so helpful to me. It was, that's perfect. It's perfect.

That's, that's, that's not even good or excellent. It's perfect in sales and marketing and all education is, is you're selling people on the notion that this information is going to improve their lives. And you have to. You have to convince them of that. Sales and marketing, you. The thing that I like to do is I like to market to a younger version of my. Myself. When my mentor, Larry Niven, talked about, well, who does he write to? He says he writes to a younger version of himself who's just as smart as he is, but needs stuff explained to him. That's kind of what it is like. Okay, so just like each of you could teach me things in your area of expertise, I am teaching you about a very specific perspective that I have. And I'm just assuming that we're all on the same road and that I'm just describing the territory that I see. You then go out there and do things and you come back and you tell us what your journey is about, and together we build a map of this territory. You understand? So, as you said, perfect, Clarissa. Thank you so much. What you just did is in. In what Cecil did. This is exactly what I want. Take these notions, take them out into the world, come back, tell us what happened. You share this on the page, you share it in the chat, you share it with with us in this, and we grow together. That makes sense. I am doing everything I can to be as honest with you as I possibly can about how I am grappling with these things right now. And I'll be going into a specific grapple a little later on, but we're still having fun answering questions. In some ways, I have an agenda, but if you guys keep me hopping with questions, I'll keep dealing with the question. That's fine by me. You can set the agenda by asking good questions. You understand how this goes? Okay. Kathy.

Hi, Steve. I put my hand up before Clarissa spoke, but Clarissa was so amazing. I really had some thoughts about putting my hand down. Let me just say that. But something struck me about what was said earlier about if you don't have gas in the tank, you can't go help a friend. And you're always ending talking about joy and being of service. So I'm kind of putting a plus one because I do work on all three every day. The idea of putting a number to it. Love that. Haven't been doing that. But I work on all three every day. But the plus one is the being of service after your own mask is on. I had a meeting with the person who works for me, and they have allergies. They always have allergies. They were apologizing for the Allergies, which I told them, don't do that. You know, if you have to sniffle, then your sniffle is quite fine. But they said that they were starting to. The screen was bothering them, like looking at the screen was bothering them. And they were sort of considering urgent care. So I'm talking about them because their body was a zero. They always think of others that before they thought of themselves. So I encourage them to go get it diagnosed, because if it is just the allergies, then okay. And it was a sinus infection and they had to take the next day off. So I'm talking. I'm adding body, mind, emotions, and the friend who might need you to get in your car.

Yeah. What I would say is you fill your own cup. And then our friends, our family are actually extensions of our own heart. We love them because we see ourselves in them. So take care of yourself first and then extend that to the people that you love in the world around you. But make sure to take care of yourself first, because otherwise you're building a codependent world where everybody's broken and leaning on each other and broken people. We need, you know, we need to take care of people. And we all have wounds in different places. But what we also need is people who can show us how to heal, you know, who can be exemplars that it's possible to heal, it's possible to take care of ourselves. Vicki. Ah, yes.

So I've concentrated on the breathing, because I understand that part.

Yes.

And I've said to myself, well, okay, I couldn't do it at noon, but I can do it at one. And so, you know, and I have also concentrated on trying to sing every day.

Oh, that's nice. Why don't you sing? Why don't you do the, you know, the breathing. Singing is breathing. So five times a day, sing a song.

That would be great for what I'm currently trying to do, which is to memorize the songs that we're gonna put on our album.

Thank you. So five times a day, sing a song, and then you got your breathing. You're working towards career at the same time. So just by doing that, and also, if you're making yourself happy by doing it and you're visualizing the end product, you have just gotten at least a one in all three areas with that single practice. Okay.

Two more things that I wanted to say. One is that something happened to me this week that has never happened before.

Please.

I went to. I went to a concert, and afterwards I was talking to the Drummer. And she said, are you two musicians? And I said, well, I am. I'm a singer. And I've never, like, claimed it like that before.

Well, good. Good for you.

And then I started talking about the group I sing with.

You say there were two other things that you want to talk about.

Well, the other thing was that I would like you to go over the morning routine again, because I don't. Every time you say it, I don't understand it.

Okay? And it's very, very simple and a little bit complicated at the same time. So what it is, is, remember the magic formula. Map or model. Action, gratitude, intention, courage. Okay? So all five of those basic things then get incorporated into. Into a ritual of motion. Now, let's say we're doing tai chi@www.firedancetaichi.com. you're doing. Let's say you're doing Tai chi. So I will talk about the way I do it. I will do affirmations, visualizations, and emotional flooding that relate to all five of the steps of the magic formula. So in other words, I might start by doing Tai chi. And I'm saying to myself, every day, in every way, I'm getting better and better. So I'm actually. How. How do I say it? How do I feel? What's my posture? What's my face? How does my voice sound? If I believed that. You act as if you believe it, okay? You act. If necessary. Then I go from. From a statement of. And that's a courage, confidence statement. That's a belief in self statement. Every day, in every way, I'm getting better and better, okay? Then I go from there to another statement that I make that I like. God's wealth is circulating in my life. His wealth flows through me in avalanches of abundance. All my needs, desires, dreams, and goals are met instantly by infinite intelligence. Because I'm one with God, and God is everything that works for me. You find some affirmation that works for you that says what you want to about your right to be happy in the world, your ability to accomplish the things that you want. So you write these things out. You write these things out. Then I go into gratitude. I'm so grateful for a strong, healthy body. I'm so grateful for the people who love me and trust me. I'm so grateful for my daughter Nikki, and my son Jason, and my beautiful, brilliant wife, Tanari. And I literally say that every time. My beautiful, brilliant wife, wife, My sister Joyce, who deserves all good things in life. And then I go into my mentors and my role Models now, you know, Steve Muhammad and Larry Niven and Octavia Butler and so forth and so on. Then I will go into the things I'm grateful for. And I play a game with myself with this. They're all things that start with the letter f. Just because I like to amuse myself. My fun, my family, my fortress, my fans, my finances. It's just amusing myself. I'm getting the emotions. I'm getting my putting my emotions in a particular place for the day. And then the last one is all I need is within me now. Now here is where I will go into a second model. And I like the High Performance 6 that Brendon Bouchard did. So it's like all the clothes, clarity I need is within me now. All the energy I need is within me now. All the urgency I need is within me now. All the productivity. Now I'm doing my tai chi. The whole time I am moving my body at the same time that I'm speaking the words. And then when I know my intentions, the. The role models that I picked to thank Steve Muhammad, chin Man Ching, BKS I Ingar, William Shakespeare, Octavia Butler, etc. These are people who are exemplars of the arenas in which I want to excel. So I have at least one role model. You need at least one role model for your body. Someone who is getting the results that you want for your emotions, someone who exemplifies the courage and the confidence and the love that you want to express in life. And then somebody for your career who has the kind of singing career or whatever that you would like to have. Who, who has the kind of technical proficiency so that you imagine that person. Now, when you do that, all you have to do is research that person. What were their attitudes? How did they, how did they train?

What.

What were they? What were their beliefs? What were this? What were this? You get to the point where if you run into a problem, you could sit quietly and ask that person. If I'm dealing with a story problem, I can go into a meditation and ask Octavia or ask Larry Niven or ask William Shakespeare and my own projections of them. If we're looking at this purely psychologically or my spiritual connection to them, if you're speaking akashically, it doesn't matter. We'll give you the information that you need. So it is movement and then you use affirmations that cover all five aspects of the magic formula and role models who can exemplify the things you want to accomplish. Remember, success is the progressive realization of a worthy goal. So you have goals in all three major arenas. Make sure you can have more than that, but never have less. You can have additional goals, but be sure you have one in terms of your body. One for your emotions, one for your career. In your mind is a minimum. Okay, Is that clearer now?

I'm going to rewatch this.

Yes. And trust me.

So, Jeff, I didn't get before, though.

Look, if you just start with moving while you're saying, every day in every way and getting better and better, and if you're feeling like you're having some emotional issues, then walk faster and speak louder. Every day and every way, I'm getting better and better. Every day and every way, I'm getting better and better. While you're running or walking or doing heavy hands, the physical exertion combined with the emotional intensity is what locks it into your body. And then if you. You can visualize where you're going, then every step feels like a step in that direction. And when the demons in your head say, no, you're not, that's a bunch of crap. Then. If one of your goals is fitness and you are moving your body, then you are doing the thing that the demon is telling you you're not doing. And at that point, you'll really understand that you are not the voices in your head. You are the one observing the voices and actually taking that position. You're moving. You're doing it. My goal was to walk today. I'm walking today, and the voice in my head is telling me I'm not walking. Ain't that a.

Is.

Is this not amazing that the voices in my head lie to me? Isn't that interesting? Okay. Does that make sense?

Yep, that makes sense.

And then you come back and you ask another question, and you come back and you ask another question, and you challenge me every week to force me to. You know, what would I do in this instance, Steve? What would I do in this instance? And I'll be happy to nail it down. It is a relatively complex concept, because your ego does not want you to understand this stuff. Because if you understand this stuff, you're going to kill your ego. You're going to actually become what you were supposed to be in life. It actually is a valid tool. Okay, Vicki.

Okay.

All right. Anybody else before we go on? Okay, so who has any questions about. In the physical things, the gong, the tai chi, anything like that that we can.

We.

We can play with a little bit here? Because otherwise, I'll go into head stuff. Everybody just wants head stuff.

No, no.

I can't let you get away with that. So what I want you to do is collapse a little bit. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Inhale. I really stretch. Feel yourself filled with air. Oh, you think about. You'd pay anything for a breath of air if it wasn't free. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale one last time.

Inhale.

Can't shake it out. That's right. We got to get out of our heads, people. We got to get out of our heads. You got to get into our bodies. Getting into your body, that's how you process the negative emotions that are in there. It's also how you wake up the positive emotions. So that's good. That's really, really good. So I want to talk a little bit about where I'm going. 2023 is turning into a fabulous year. We did six weeks in the writer's room, which was a peak experience, especially since, in many ways, I wasn't supposed to be able to accomplish that. I wasn't supposed to be able to do that. 20 years ago. I was told I was too old to do that. So you can imagine that it's like, oh, okay. I'm not taking this for granted. Let's see. No, I've never done a marathon. Cecil. The greatest distance I ever used to run. I used to do five miles and love it. I really love doing that distance. So a lot of my question is, what do I want to accomplish for the rest of this year? And I don't know what the year is going to throw at me. So what's going to be important is that I raise my personal gains so that whatever it is that comes, I can deal with it, or at least I have the best chance of dealing with it. Now. I know some things. I know some things about what I want to do this next year get my lighting on wrong. I know that I want to raise my game career wise. There's some things that are happening there. I've been asked to write a Star wars novel, and I'm looking at that, and I think I'm gonna do it. Looks. It seems pretty. Pretty clear that I'm gonna do it. And so I'm gonna need to have my mind and body and emotions all lined up to do that with joy and have fun doing it. I know I want to launch my son into his adulthood. He's just taken his first step into adulthood. He created a product. It is available at Tanari. Put that in there. It is magic4teens.com. He has created the first Self improvement products by a teen for a teen. And it's, and it's backed up with our story of how we got him from ADHD to A's. That from failing all of his classes to succeeding and graduating high school successfully. I cannot even tell you how proud of him I am. And if you are dealing with an ADHD situation, I would strongly suggest I would make a personal request. This product is priced very, very low for the first 30 days because we want the first 30 days of this to be a total win for him. So if you.

I wanted to jump in since we're talking about magic for teens. Hello, everybody. So now that I'm jumped on, I don't know what to say. I'm almost speechless. We've been talking about this product in theory, for Jason, to help him understand the marketing that we do for a long time now. I'd say since probably before he graduated from high school. Do you think that's true? Yeah.

Yes, it is. It's absolutely true.

And since that time he's been, he lives with us, which is great. And he's had an internship with us where we give him daily assignments and we want him to learn how to use social media to spread the word about his products. And he has to listen to mentor videos. Not just in terms of how you sell things, it's. It's more people like Brendan Burchard who are very positive in terms of showing you things that sometimes you already know.

We have a self improvement course by Mike Tyson, which is actually true.

True. So he listens to mentor videos. So this was a triumph for him. And also, I have to say, someone who does not like putting himself in the public eye, specifically not, you know, as good looking as he is. And if you go to the product page for no other reason alone, go see how gorgeous he is. He doesn't like to put his face out there. He doesn't like to. He doesn't like to post videos of himself. He'll post videos with pictures and music, but he's, he's a bit shy. So for someone like that to take the step to record an MP3. Right, Clarissa, I told you so. To record an MP3 for the public and to allow us as his parents to talk about the very, very public, personal parenting journey that we undertook with him and to agree to do that and to put it out there as a way to teach himself about marketing and how to, to market a product you yourself are enthusiastic about, because sales is a transfer of enthusiasm. So many things are happening right now and we're just so excited for him.

So just.

So I'm. I'm just going to say one last thing about it. Don't get me started. Even if you're not parents or your kids are long gone, if you have anyone with children in your life, it's not just for parents of kids with adhd. The tools that are in this product could work for all kinds of children.

It's about creating a family culture of excellence and love and acceptance and 100% support, support and belief in that child, because that's what kids need. They need 100 support, 100% love. But they also need someone who believes in them more than they believe in themselves.

And.

And if you've seen any of the other online courses that we've offered, like the Soulmate course or fire dance, Tai Chi, even you will recognize principles that we teach in other courses. In Jason's course, there is definitely Bleed Through Fire Dance.

When Krishnamurti said that he's no longer teaching people who do not have a physical discipline, because otherwise they just stay up in their heads. They just think about it a lot. I want you moving. Okay? So fire dance has become the core that we're doing, teaching you how to create a morning ritual. Then this course, from ADHD to A's course, simply takes that notion. You do not need to have the fire dance course to be able to do this. Of course, you have a personal ritual. You have a family ritual, and you bring the child into the family ritual so that there is a family culture of excellence and growth, that we're all in this together. They're not alone in this, nor are they broken. They just have a different set of issues than the other people in the family. Everybody in the family has issues. We're all working on this together. What are your issues? How can I work on that? What are your issues? How do I go? We also had a wellness circle. We had doctors and therapists, therapists and, you know, medications and stuff like this. But the question was, how do we all move together as a family? This is what we do as a family. So that's to say that, that. That if my. If my physical, if my career stuff, I know what I want to do there in terms of. In terms of writing. I know what I want there in terms of emotions. And I want to deepen my love with my wife. I want to deepen my connection to my children. I want to deepen my connection to my friends. I want to be a happier, healthier person myself. And in order to drive all that I need physical energy now. I want to have more physical energy than I currently have right now. Because I want to be sure there's something I call a false physiological profile. Just to be very brief about it, if you were 50 years old, it's aiming at having the energy of a 25 year old. The theory being that if you have the energy of a 25 year old with the experience of a 50 year old, you're functionally a genius. Because basically it's like a 25 year old with the experience of a 50 year old be one bad mama jama. So that's you're functioning at that level. So it's just, it's cheating, it is tricking. I'm hacking my body mind. But to do that, I also want to go to Manila in 2024 for a week long Filipino martial arts workshop. And I figured that if I aim at doing that, then the person I need to be to succeed at that is also has the energy and the aliveness and the adaptability to be able to do great with whatever kind of career stuff comes up. So you'll notice that the career stuff will pay for Manila, but aiming at Manila will provide me with the energy and aliveness and focus that I need to make the money. And also what I need in order to lead my family, you know, to not lead my family. Because Tanamariv and I are hunting together. We're a hunting pair, we hunt together. Sometimes she's in the lead, sometimes I'm in the lead. But we're both, we're both looking out for what's going on out there. And our son, of course, is the prince who will inherit the kingdom. I said, mixing metaphors. He is my cub and you know, my daughter is my cub. And we are hunting together as a family, you know, so it is to be the person who can do the things to get to the destiny. All right, so let's take this and introduce a concept. Because what I like to do, I want you to get the morning ritual and the magic formula and I want you to have that so that if I woke you up at 3 o' clock in the morning and asked what they were, you could tell me. Because when you know something that deeply, that's when you got an unconscious competence and it's just happening. So, you know, if getting to the point where you're doing your minimums, that's what I want. Do your minimums. You don't have to do everything but make sure you don't zero out on any Day, you know, don't zero out ever. So I'm looking at this and I'm saying, well, what do I need to be in order to go to Manila and spend a week representing my martial arts organization and having hopefully a wonderful experience and pretending to be John Wick or whatever it is? You know, just, yeah, I think I'm ready anyway. So the three Dimensional Performance Pyramid. Suggests what it is that we need in order to really be ready to function. To really be ready to function. So the first thing we need is to have our emotions wired tight. So how do I feel about it? How do I think about it? Your emotions. You know, the Hawaiian huna say that our body is like a black bag where we put our unprocessed emotions. So if you're trying to raise to get into shape or to get into better shape or lose weight or whatever it is, the first thing you have to do is make sure you got your head wired on tight, your heart wired on tight. Do you have permission to lose that weight? Do you have permission to get into shape? Do you have permission to get to a higher level of excellence in terms of your physical motion? Do you? How do you represent these things? And you better believe once you understand how this works in the body. Because as scary as it is to think, the body is probably the easiest of the three major things to deal with. Because you control all aspects of your body more than you control aspects of your relationships. A heck of a lot more than you control your finances. With your finances, you might need a thousand customers. With a relationship, you need at least one person outside yourself. But your body is between you and you. So if you have problems there, those problems are going to multiply in the other arenas. And if you can deal with that there, then you've got a foundation. So the first thing to do is to look into your emotions. So I have to ask myself the question, what? You know, I'm looking at my beliefs, my values, my emotional anchors. What do I believe about this? Is there a voice in my head telling me that I might be too old to do this? You better believe that voice is in your head. And one of the things that anybody can tell you, as you get older, that voice gets louder and louder. It starts telling you, in other words, instead of saying, if you're 15 years old and you try to do something, you can't do it, you're likely to think, oh, well, I'll do it tomorrow or I'll get stronger. But if you're 51, shift those around, then all Of a sudden, you can't do it. You figure, oh, well, I guess it's over. I guess I'll never be able to do that. I guess I'm too old. You have to interrogate those things. You look for the role models of people who could have the kind of aliveness. So do I have in my mentor visualizations during my morning ritual, someone who is older than me, who is fitter than me? Absolutely. Danny Losanto, you just, you know, fan, fabulous martial artist in his 80s. Steve Muhammad, fabulous martial artist in their 80s. They say, what are you talking about, kid? You're not too old. That's the voice, their voice in my head. So you have to get this done first. Emotional health is the foundation of everything. Emotional health is the most important thing. Next, it's body health. Notice we ain't talking fitness. We're not talking fitness. Health is not fitness. Health is how do you feel when you wake up in the morning? You know, your joints feel good, you have energy. How's your sex drive? How's your optimism towards life? That's healthy. Just how do you feel? And this is important. So emotional health and physical health are important. So in terms of the program that we have put together for you, the joint mobility and the tai chi and the five Tibetans are about health. Okay, before we go on Jamie Lee Curtis, I've noticed in every interview made a point to say she's 64 years old. Yeah. And Tananarive and I did a Billy Blanks Taebo class in Hollywood with Jamie Lee Curtis in the row right ahead of us. What woman could move something? She is in excellent shape. She takes care of herself and always has. Anyway, so any questions about these two emotional health and physical health before we go on? Because that's what I want is your foundation for you to feel good, for you to feel alive. In fact, if you have enough health, it substitutes for fitness. Kids aren't particularly fit, but they're so healthy naturally they can they fit. You know, an Olympic athlete would get worn out trying to follow a kid around and do all the things that kid did all day. That's the natural health. So a lot of what we're trying to work out here is to get you in touch with your natural health, your natural energy, and check. Qigong is like that. Those qigong exercises are about finding the natural flow of health within you and then expanding that. Tom, you keep leaning forward as if you want to say something.

I just wanted to ask something. What do you call this triangular stack?

It's called the three dimensional performance pyramid.

Okay, Is this Brendan Bouchard or is this yours?

No, no, no, this is Scott Sonnen with a slight adaptation. I added the emotional health. Everything else was part of what the Russians gave him. So I think the emotional health is important. Three dimensional performance pyramid.

Three dimensional performance pyramid. Thank you.

Yes. Anybody else have any questions about this? Because like everything else, I tell you, this is the most important thing. Every week I'm going to give you the most important thing. Okay? So the next step is fitness. Once you've got your emotions together and your health together. Now we start working on fitness. Now, fitness is how far, how fast, how much you know, how, how far can you throw something, how high can you jump, how long can you run, how fast can you run? That's fitness, okay? And then there is the different kinds of fitness. There's general fitness, like general aerobics, general strength, general flexibility. And then there is specific fitness that applies to a particular activity you're trying to do. Every particular activity you're trying to do has a different specific fitness. So if you're, if you want to play golf, you want a general, you want, you know, your emotions to be healthy, you want a general, you want general physical health, you want general fitness in terms of strength and endurance and flexibility, but then some specific fitness for your grip, for instance, specific balance of flexibility in your shoulders and hips or, you know, whatever it is. So you look at what the physical demands of the particular activity are, and then you tweak your activities so that you are developing that because you can't be world class at everything. You know, the decathlon life is, is a decathlon in a lot of ways. So you want to get in the game. And it's kind of interesting that there are ways in which human beings are the greatest athletes on the planet. No other animal can run and jump and throw and swim and lift and climb. No other animal can do all of that. It's us. So when, if, if our potential was to be an Olympic level athlete.

Look.

At yourself and be honest enough with yourself to ask, what happened? What got between me and my natural aliveness? Because the answer to that question is not terribly different than asking yourself the question, what got between me and having the love, love of my dreams? What got between me and having the career of my dreams? If you make the assumption that you had that potential and in many ways have that potential, then what happened as you ran into the world and the world ran into you? If you can say, this is where I was going, but then My parents didn't support me doing this and they criticize it. And I ran into school and I wasn't good at this and I got beat up by these bullies over here and I. This, this, this. There is grief attached to those things, but there is also a deepened understanding that you have magnificent potential and that you are now your own mommy or daddy. You can now protect that little kid inside you with all that potential and say, that's what I ran into then. Today is a new day. And as long as I don't get a zero on any day for now on, I can move forward. That's all you have to do, just not get a zero. You don't have to get to nines. Perfectionism is procrastination. Masquerading is quality control. You don't have to be perfect, you have to get in the game. You have to take actions. You have to learn and notice the reaction the world gave to the actions you took. General fitness would be things like, you know, for most athletes it's things like running in the weight room and stretching. That's generalized fitness.

Skill.

Is what are the neurological things connected to a particular activity. The neurological, this is the head stuff. It's coordination, strategy, tactics and so forth. So in terms of going to the Philippines, I want to have my head in the right place, my heart in the right place. I would certainly want to be healthy. I mean, I canceled the last going to the last one because Covid was coming. I could see it. Generalized fitness. I want enough generalized fitness to be able to have enough energy to go all day long and then sleep deeply and well and recover at night and start, get together, get up the next morning, start over again. But the generalized skill, there are going to be movement patterns, footwork, hand work, things like this, speed and coordination and so forth that will enable me to flow with people who are professionals there and people who are life lifetime practitioners there. I love Kali and Escrima and Pentateuch and Sikharan and all these, these Filipino arts and then the, the Indonesian arts of Salat, which are very, very close to them. I love this stuff. It's beautiful. And I want to be able to have the experience of a lifetime. I want to come back from the Philippines feeling like I have had the experience the little kid inside me always wanted to have, which is go to Asia and practice martial arts, you know, that's why I wanted that when I was just a little kid. So by aiming at doing something that makes the little boy inside me, me happy, I will get the discipline to eat better, rest better, exercise more, which gives me the energy to put into my work, my writing, and also give to my family. So we're a healthier family unit. I'm earning more money, and the money pays for my trip to the Philippines. Who's understanding what I'm doing here? You understand how I'm hacking this whole system, how everything I'm doing is connected to everything else. And I'm using that to motivate myself. I'm using my writing to motivate my. My behaviors of my family and my body. I'm using my physical stuff to motivate my behaviors with my writing and my family, and I'm using my family stuff, motivate my behaviors with my body and my. And my writing. So everything is connected to everything else. The danger with this is that once you've done this, you gotta do it. That. That if you define yourself as the kind of person who does these kinds of things. Things. There is a price when you don't do it. In other words, it is effortless in some ways for me to be a father, no matter how intense it is and how costly it is. I don't have to ask myself any questions if, you know, I was getting ready to work the other day and my son called up and said that they run out of gas 25 miles down the freeway. It's like, okay, this is what I'm here for. This is who I am. It's my kid. Of course I do it. Is it an annoyance in some ways, but it's also a joy.

When we were about to record a podcast, no less.

Yeah. When your values are clear, behaviors get easy. Decisions become easy, even if the actions are intense. When Tananari's mom was dying and we had to move as a family to Atlanta, I hated it. But this is what had to be done. It was as simple as that. This is what had to be done. You know, I didn't drag my feet at all. I mean, emotionally, I was kicking and screaming. But in terms of actually doing the things that we needed to do, this is what we have to do. We're a family. This is what families do. That. By getting myself together to raise my level for Manila, I also counteract the part of me that's kind of saying, well, Steve, you're getting older. You know, you've already accomplished all this. You've got three black belts. You got this, you got this. You got this gorgeous woman who loves you the way you are. You don't need to work at that stuff anymore. It's so insidious. It's so insidious. The instant you stop romancing your baby, the relationship starts dying. The instant you stop, you stop looking for the edge of your capacity. You stop. Your writing turns into crap. The instant you stop working out and finding what your edge is, you start dying.

So.

Every day, then when I'm doing my morning ritual, I was every day and everywhere I'm getting better and better. And you better believe I'm thinking about doing tai chi, physically, martial arts. My body, I'm getting. I'm increasing my body mind connection. I'm getting better at my body mind connection. Not necessarily making my body stronger, but the connection is getting clearer. And that connection can keep getting clearer until the moment you die. God's wealth is circulating in my life. That's not just money, that's vibrancy. It's health, it's love, it's honesty, it's courage. The wealth of life is the engagement of life, that feeling of abundance and passion. The things I'm grateful for. Family, friends, mentors, business partners, the things I'm grateful for relate to all three areas of my life. Because if I'm grateful for what I already got, it's easier for me to believe that maybe I can have something in the future. If I know that I have pushed myself and accomplished all of my dreams from a kid, it's kind of easy to think, well, one more dream, just one more dream. It's not all this is impossible thing and it's on the other side of the world. It's going to cost so much money. It's going to be so scary. They're going to have knives. It's, this is who I am, it's who I've always been. This is just another step on the path. And isn't the path wonderful? It's hard, but it's chop wood, carry water. This is just as. Just who I said I was. Every year cost me a little bit more to be Steve, but I like being Steve. I amuse myself, I like me. And I'm willing to do the work necessary to be me. It's as simple as that. I like to show up and be me. And then the last thing is performance or competition. See, this is how people hurt themselves being weekend athletes. They go out and perform, but they don't do skill work. They don't necessarily work on their fitness much and they're not necessarily healthy. So they tear their bodies apart because they're trying to perform the same way. They can remember themselves Performing when they were teenagers. So then they hurt themselves. And then they tell themselves, well, I guess I'm just too old. No, you didn't do the work. You didn't do this stuff. You didn't take care of your emotions. So you were afraid to look at what's going on inside your body because you were afraid. You didn't do the work necessary to be as healthy as possible and to know where your body is on a particular day. So you don't accidentally hurt yourself, throw your back out by reaching for a can of peas. I mean, how many people do that? They throw their backs out when they bend over. If they had worked out that morning, done some Tibetan, maybe some tai Chi, they would have noticed, oh, my back is a little bit tight. So you don't bend over. You bend your knees because you feel where your body is because you're concerned about them. They didn't develop their general fitness. They just went out and played ball. So they beat themselves up and, well, I guess I'm getting old.

No.

Love yourself. Be in touch with that kid inside you. Don't deny all the work they have done for decades to be the best they can be. Your heart has done everything it could to get you to this place. Love yourself enough to have a healthful discipline. Love yourself enough to forgive yourself for not being 19 anymore. Love yourself enough to know you know you did the best you could with the resources you have, and now you've got better resources because you found a community. Community of people who care, who are working together. So when I do my morning ritual, it is designed what. Who do I need to be today to not have a zero in any category, to get the highest grade that I can in all three categories with my writing, my finances, my emotional life, with my family, my physical vibrancy, you know, so my goals, my role models, my actions all have to be in that line. And what I know from experience is if I get my morning ritual right, I won't just have a one for the day. I'll probably have fours or fives in all three areas at the least. And if I really do it, if I really do it powerfully, I can start aiming at getting a 7, 8. I could be cruising. There are days when it's like, I did that perfectly and I dealt with my family and everybody's happy, and I didn't snap it to Nanarive even once. You know, I wasn't snippy with her. I was just appreciating how much I love her and how much she loves me. And I got good writing done and good research done and I took care of, you know, this is, this is life. This is deciding to engage with life on your terms every day. Jamie said, let me see. We got a chat here. This has been a challenging asthma week. I did what I needed to do, though slower than I prefer. As long as you didn't get a zero, you're fine. I messed my knee up badly 14 years ago by just being in just good enough shape that I tried to keep step over something I should have pulled up and ducked under. Old muscle memory. You remember when you had greater flexibility, you acted as if you had greater flexibility under stress. This is why working in the yard and doing housework and so forth, it's work, but it's not exercise. When I talk about exercise, I'm talking about increasing the body mind connection. You are moving your body and paying attention to it. Now, you understand that I just said something that is in contradiction to the notion of walking while you're doing the morning ritual. I know that. But what I would suggest then is you walk, you do your morning ritual, you keep walking, you notice, you connect with your mind and your body, then you do your affirmations and your visualizations and you go back to noticing your mind and body. I believe that it is a valid trade off if the only thing you have the time to do is do the movement while you're doing the affirmations. That's better than doing them separately. What I like to do when I do Tai chi and I'm doing my affirmations, one of the things that is true is that is not a day that I'm getting better at Tai chi. It's a day when I'm cruising and staying steady at Tai chi. I'm working my body, am I working my mind, and I'm working my capacity to handle complex problems, staying in a flow state. But if I do Tai chi a second time, which I do sometimes without doing the affirmations at the same time, that's the day that I'm going to get better at the Tai chi because I'm putting all my attention into it. So everything's a trade off. Everything's a trade off. This program, Fire dance tai chi www.firedancetaichi.com is it's the crown of my life. It is. It is the core of this thing, the ADHD to A's program, which I'm saying, if you're interested in it, get it this weekend. Because it would be great for Jason to take A look and see how his efforts paid off. We do things. Success is the progressive realization of a worthy goal. By making that goal small enough that you can succeed every day, you get to actually see it. You feel it. You're more likely to. To do it. Okay. I want you to set up your life so that you can win every day. Think about that. What would it feel like to win every day? I mean, it's hard to even imagine how cool it is to look at your life and think to yourself, I just had another 24 hours where I was me, I was myself. I did the things I said I was going to do. I took a step toward my goal. And if there was a mountain out there, a misty mountain, and you're in a jungle, and from time to time you can just kind of glimpse the mountain and you can take just a couple of steps, just a couple of steps, you know that eventually you'll get out of the jungle, you'll get to that mountain, and life can feel like such a jungle. It can feel like there's so many paths and so many things to be done. I want you to win every day. I want you to come back next Saturday and saying no zeros, nothing but twos and threes. I got one day with a one. That's okay. I still did the job. All right, final comments, questions or requests before we close up because we have to go and be on a panel.

I had a question.

Yes.

Posted something in the group about the ritual that you taught at one point that you do with your wife with the hand on the heart.

Yes.

So you don't have enough time to explain the whole thing now. I have 179 emails between you and Tananarive that I could look through to find that.

Okay, you want to go through it really quickly? Forum. I can't hear you.

You mean like, come upstairs?

No, no, no, no. Just, just. Just. Just right now.

Oh, me go through it?

No, no. Can we go through it together right now, real quick? Okay. So basically, we bow to each other.

So we don't break out into a fight. Then we love it.

I put my hand over her heart. She puts her hand over my heart. And I put my hand. And we hold eyes with each other. And we inhale and exhale 10 times. Okay. And after 10 times, we sing the following. You are my beloved. I open my heart to you. Then we breathe five more times, holding each other's eyes. 1. And then we hug for five breaths. And that's it. That's the blessing dance. We do that five, six days a week just to connect with each other. So that means that I have my personal ritual, my meditation, my morning ritual. We have the blessing dance, which is our couple ritual. You find out more about that in the soulmate process. Course. And then we have our family meetings, which go into the meeting into the ritual that Jason is doing, which you can find out more about at www.magicthenumber4teens.com that's today. I would love for you to unmute yourselves and say goodbye and wish everybody next week. You betcha.

Bye bye, people.

Have a great day. Enjoy the comedy.

I gotta go someplace, too.

And just being here.

No zeroes, people.

I'm so be heroes in the adventure of your lifetime. It's your life. Seize it. Take care, folks. Bye, bye. Bye, bye bye.