Warrior's Journey: Fear and Helplessness

Rebirths all the time. We are, I think a lot of times the term reinventing the wheel, so to speak, has a negative connotation. And I'm a fan of reinventing the wheel all the time. You know, if you think about the first wheel, it was this lumpy, clumpy thing, and look where it is now. It went through many, many innovations. So bringing that back to the blessing the we just experienced in our lives. I've thought a lot about that birth in general and breath work. You know, that baby comes through and takes its first breath of air and starts experiencing life in this world. So this has just brought up a lot of energy for me, particularly, like Stephen said, at this time where things are off kilter but no less than beautiful. So I am consistently reminding myself of that. The birth of my grandchild has brought that to the forefront for me at this time. So my point with that, too, is to encourage everybody to find their beautiful. Find their beautiful in this time where things seem to be not so great.

Well, I think that one of the things that. One of the reasons that I wanted to touch on this is the whole the ancient child idea. The idea that there are many of us who do not have permission to feel protective towards ourselves, but we do. We are hardwired to be protective toward new life, especially new life that is connected to us genetically or spiritually, emotionally. So let me just ask you a question with an obvious answer. What would you do? How far would you go to protect that child?

Oh, my gosh. This is not going to be a popular answer, but I would do harm if I had to, if it were appropriate to protect a child from violence. And I'm not a violent person. And again, this may not be popular answer, but maybe the softer answer is, I would do whatever it takes.

Well, I think that that answer is as hard as a diamond. You know, the fact that you would do whatever it takes to protect that child, to protect your daughter. I don't know why that answer would be unpopular except to people who are not honest, really, about their own emotions, who have never had total responsibility for another life. We are descended from thousands of generations of people willing to do whatever it took to protect us. That's. That's who we are. That's our. That's our heritage. And I was blessed, you know, when I sat down with dawn and talked to her about her program and asked her, how did she do this? How did she essence hack the martial arts, really what she did in a lot of ways, and all it was was connecting that Survival instinct. Instinct for us to survive and our, our progeny to survive in the light of a spiritual connection in the eyes of God. So you have the instinct, which is down there on the, almost the animal level, and you have intuition, which is up on a more spiritual level. And you connect the two of those things. And when you do that, that's, that's that hard wiring now.

Yes.

You know, I know that as a man holding my child for the first time, it was as if a door opened in my mind and I saw the circle of life in a totally different way. And it, it has to be more, far, far more intense for the woman who brings that life into the world through her body. Can you speak? You know, we talked about discussing fear and helplessness this week, and we'll get to that. But we have a genuine miracle that we can, we can touch here. And if you can talk just a little bit about the experience of bringing life into the world through your body in that way and how it changed you and how it touched, you know, how did you connect that, that life bringing aspect to the warrior aspect? How did those things connect?

Hmm. That, that's a, that's a big ask. You always have such big asks. But let me see if I can distill it down on a few different levels. And as you are speaking, I'll, I'll go with the old first thing that came to mind. So physically, as a woman going through the birth process, as you're coming towards it, there's this huge fear of the unknown. You know, it's going to be hard. You just, you know, all of your women friends tell you that, well, you're, you're in for a big ride. And I can't tell you exact. Nobody can tell you how it's gonna feel. You will only know when you're in it. So knowing that what I did is I did a lot of preparation. I knew that it was gonna be hard. So I created resources for myself. I thought, okay, when it's getting hard, here's some breathing tools that I can use. Here's some vinyasa, here's some flow, here's some movement I can use. So going in, I prepared myself. Now during some of those tools went right out the window. It's like, well, that's not working and it's frankly annoying. So during the difficult journey, I used what worked, I threw out what didn't. There were times where I thought, I do not want to do this. Get me out of here. I wanted to run away from myself. But Again, came back to breathing. What really helped was to not manipulate the process, but to just be there. Just be in it. Just breathe normally.

Wow, Mary.

So those are. Those are things during the process. If you want to talk about how it felt after my children were born and to hold them, to feel the most. I don't. You can label it love, but to feel the most astounding. I'll say connection. Connection that was so profound, indescribable in. Just literally indescribable on every level. And that's where that feeling of I am here for you no matter what. Did I make mistakes as a parent? Absolutely. But that sense of I'm here for you no matter what has. Has stayed true.

That's excellent. Now, you said something, Patrick. You. You.

Oh, sorry. Can I add one more thing? You asked to connect that to warrior work, and the way that that connects to warrior work is you have to have that same regard for yourself. I am here for myself no matter what, no matter what it takes. And some days sometimes are harder than others. Having that regard for yourself will translate into being there for others, but it has to start with you. And like you said, there's been people with horrible upbringings. They've been abandoned in many ways, and that hasn't necessarily been modeled for them. So this work brings you. Brings you back to that, to creating a model for yourself.

There's something that's swimming around in my head right now, but I want to make sure that.

Patrick, that was a lot.

Yes, it was a lot. It really was. So, Patrick, you. You were about to say something, buddy.

No, I just. I just commented when Mary made the statement that. And this is not going to be a quote, but when she said what I was, what I was focused on, what I became interested in is the moment is being there for this thing and not what I wanted to do about it. That didn't matter. What mattered was that I showed up to this process. And that is true for almost even anything we do. So. But that was. That was very profound, Mary. I really appreciated that.

I wanted to. To interrogate one little piece of that. You were saying that you didn't want to impose your will upon the process. You were ready with breathing exercises, with, you know, perspectives, with this, with that. But what you really needed to do was surrender to the process, and that when you did that. Would I be misinterpreting to say that the process taught you what you needed to know to be with it?

Yeah, I think that's a way to put it. That another Way to say it is fighting it. Distracting myself from it wasn't going to serve me. And so, yes, in a sense, I learned that, yes, being in it taught me to be in the process.

Were you fully engaged with the process or observing the process?

It went back and forth. It went back and forth, to be honest. Yeah.

Was there a difference between those two things? In other words, were there times it's like, was it related to the intensity of the moment? Was it better when you were totally engaged? Was it better when you were observing? Was it just different? The terms better or different not really apply. Help me understand.

Sure. I think for me personally, and again, I want to also say that this birthing process is also a metaphor for other. Other things that take a long time and require endurance, so to speak.

So.

I think your question was, was being an observer versus being engaged, was one better? Was that your question?

Yeah, better, More appropriate, Different. Can you help us understand what the relationship of those two positions was? Being engaged might be considered sort of a one point. You know, you're just there, you're in the middle of it, and then observing is a little separated from it. And I can imagine that there would be times when you would want to be separated from that process, but there would be other times when you. It would be better, healthier, more appropriate to be totally engaged with the process. And I just kind of wondered whether or not there seemed to be any. Not logic, but meaning to the times when you were totally engaged as opposed to the times when you were observing, which was. Which was your preferred position?

Yeah. Okay. I don't think that one was preferred over the other. So the process being that it was a long process that went through many different phases, and each phase was different. And so I would go through a phase of this endurance journey and something in particular would be working, you know, whatever that was. And during those times, I could be completely present, engaged, using that particular type of breath or movement or whatever it was to roll through that phase. And then the next phase would start to happen, and perhaps what I was doing wouldn't be working anymore. And at those times when that particular thing wasn't working anymore, that would be the time to step back and observe and reassess, so to speak. Okay, what, what, I'm slipping or things are getting harder or things are getting more intense. I'm feeling like I can't do this or whatever it was. So at that point, taking a step back from the process, okay, what are my resources now? What can be different? What can I change? How can I break into a new rhythm, and that would allow me to find that rhythm, get into that rhythm and move on through the next gate, so to speak.

The beautiful thing in what you're saying is that, as Patrick implied, what you're talking about is the same thing as what total artistic immersion is. It's the same thing in what giving yourself totally to. Well, it's what being in combat is like, you know, when you're totally engaged, you are not there, but the thing is there. It's happening. But then there are times when you step back tactically into a strategic position and say, what can I do now? And move. It can feel terrifying to lose your identity and become totally emerged in the process, which is why some people have a difficult time being fully responsive sensually, for instance. It can be frightening to lose yourself because the ordinary self is not present. There's something there that you were about to say. Please.

Oh, me?

Yes. Was there something.

No, I was. I was in it with you.

Yeah. Okay. We'll just. We'll just. Because the fact is that now, when you're totally engaged in the moment now, your instinct and your intuition are both completely engaged, and there is no question of can I do this? Can it is happening.

You're doing it.

You're doing it. You're right in the middle of it. You know, there's, you know, why are you lying to yourself and say, I don't know if I can do. What are you talking about? You're doing it. So fear in that sense is. Might represent the intensity we talked about, looking at the difference between fear and helplessness. The fact is that our bodies know how to do the things our bodies are programmed to do. Our hearts know how to do the things that our hearts are programmed to do. It's our brains that question. It's our brains that get all messed up about this stuff when we are afraid. That is a natural function of the heart. It is a natural sensation within the body, the stepping outside to look at the difference between who you are and what the challenge is, that that's the observer position, and it has its place. Unless you lose faith in yourself, unless you lose that connection, the part of you that already said you would do whatever it takes to protect this child, to this thing, to bring this life into the world, to engage with this task, this righteous task that you have brought to yourself. It's only when you step back and then you let yourself get scared. Oh, I'm so small. The task is so large. Opposed to simply surrendering to the process of giving to it completely, allowing yourself to die, allowing your. Your ego view of yourself to die and simply engage totally in what's there. Then when the thing is over, you reconstitute. It's like, then, wow, I'm back. I'm here again. You know that we have a number of things in life where we need to bring everything that we are. I would think from everything that women have told me of the experience, that giving birth is one of those things that requires the totality of us, that shatters the ordinary view of what we are and opens the door to something larger. That place of when it says, I would do whatever it takes to keep this child secure, you know in your heart that the person that said that is not the person who shops at the local supermarket. It's not the person that's on your phone, on the phone to your friends. It's a different person. So one question that I would have for you is, after you gave birth, how long did it take for your ordinary personality to reassert itself, to reconstitute, for Mary to be back in that room?

My gut answer is, it didn't.

You never came all the way back. No.

There's no way. You're changed. Know, any profound experience in your life, any type of birth changes you. You're not going to come back the same.

That's it. Sorry for the trick question. I knew.

I'm like, well, never, never.

That's right. That's right. You know, and I knew, I knew that that would be. If you were going to be genuine, you were going to be honest with it. That would be the only thing that you could say. No real experience, no deep experience, no profound experience. Leaves us the same. It cannot if it does. By definition, it was trivial. We're not allowing it in.

Dissociated.

You dissociated the experience.

When.

If you can connect to the survival aspect, that immortal aspect, that animal aspect, you know, the part that doesn't understand relative sizes and keep our eyes on what our real task, our real burden, the thing that we're supposed to wrestle with in life, if we can keep connected to both of those simultaneously, we're different. We are in this moment. And I think that those of us who seek to live authentic lives seek out such experiences, or when those experiences happen, we embrace them. And I wanted to give an example. Right now we're in a position. Right now, the world is dealing with a pandemic. It's dealing with a disease that we've never seen before. So we do not Understand it and it's frightening. And people make guesses as to how to deal with it. And what is necessary in this situation is powerful leadership. Powerful leadership. And unfortunately we don't have that right now. We do not have the kind of leadership that would be ideal to calm us, to recommend the, the healthiest behaviors, to help us to see what our responsibilities are as individuals. And it can be terrifying. There is threat. And I don't see how we're going to get through this. I am afraid. I don't know what to do. And that can lead to that sense of paralysis and helplessness. The way through that is to understand that when that leaders don't exist from above, they don't just appear like, you know, full born from the brow of Zeus. We lift leaders up. Leadership requires cooperation from the people. This structure of tribal leadership has existed for tens of thousands of years where the tribe gets large enough that you can't just sit in a circle and make decisions. You appoint someone or some council of people to make those decisions. And as long as those decisions are in alignment with your values, you allow them to keep that power. But to forget for even a moment that that is power that we lend them, it's not power that they have that we are the power. We are the leaders. When the leadership fails from the top, then each and every one of us, especially those of us with families to protect, must step into the leadership position. That position that, that thought that you had, I would do whatever it takes to protect you now becomes a social responsibility. What do we need to do as individuals to be leaders to keep our children safe in the world? What is necessary there? I wanted to talk about what that is, because when you can take fear, emotion is a message to take an action. It is, it says, move closer to or further away from this thing. You're going to act now, you're going to kiss now, you're going to hug now, you're going to run now, you're going to fight now. When you are genuinely engaged in the process, there is no consideration of can I or will he. It's only this moment, 100% authentic. The world sorts out what happens. The world might beat you, but you never beat yourself. And this is so critical. It's critical whether you're talking about protecting your family. It's critical whether you're talking about owning yourself, your heart, your dreams, protecting your dreams, that little child within you, that child spirit within you. Or whether you're going to be a role model for your community and carry yourself with Dignity, wear your mask. Social distance. Don't go outside for trivial things. Be careful. Be extra courteous to people, because everyone is under huge stress. Each and every one of us must be a leader. So I wanted to talk just a little bit about the characteristics of leadership. I was reading back through those wonderful transcripts that I have with Dawn. She was talking about leadership and the fact that we cannot lead people where we have not been. We cannot raise people up higher than we stand. You know, we can let them stand on our shoulders. You know, we can do that, and they can see how far they can go. But we have to be willing to stand tall. We have to be capable of it. So the first principle of a leader is that you. A leader has to be able to get themselves into the state of power that they're going to ask other people to step into. If a leader is the one who can inspire a team, you know, it's halftime, you know, win one for the Gipper, you know, whatever. If the leader is the. Is the coach who says, you know, get back out there. He's dropping his right, you know, hook over the top every time, you know, he bobs his head. The part of you that believes, the part of you that knows, the part of you that is connected with those things inside us that are eternal. In order to give this to others, your first step is to have it for yourself, and you must have it for yourself. You must be able to recognize when you are losing your center, when you're off balance. Now, this is one of the places that the breathing exercises come in. If you set up an alarm so that every hour, every three hours, you're breathing, and you're constantly developing and refining your capacity to breathe smoothly and with power, then there will be times when that alarm goes off, and you will notice you were not in a resourceful state when that went on. It's like, oh, I'm not in a resourceful state. Let me change. Let me stop. Let me reintegrate myself. Okay? That's the first level to notice when you're in the unresourceful state state, and then to reintegrate. The next step after that is to set yourself up so that when the unresourced, when the negative things happen, you automatically trigger into a resourceful state. This is the bow before you come onto the mat. You know, this is. This is the. The morning incantation ritual that you do, knowing that every day will have its challenges. Allow me to set it up so that if my child is upset, rather than me getting Upset, too. I step into the space to love them or to observe what is happening. When you start doing that automatically, then the environment triggers you. It's like the first step is you. You notice that you are terrified of the dragon that is attacking you. You manage to reintegrate yourself. The second step is that every time you see a dragon, you automatically step into your suit of armor. Just automatically. The third step is there are no dragons. There are puppies. That thing that you used to be afraid of is now your ally. You start seeing the world as an opportunity to bring it. Now, Patrick, I would love for you to say something. You said something to me once, Patrick, that when you see problems occurring in life, you say, thank you, God, for another opportunity to find out who I am. Do you remember that?

Absolutely.

Talk to us a little bit about that, would you, please?

Well, so let me tell you. It actually, there was a movie that Robin Williams was in called the Fisher King. And it was about a guy who had been driven insane by the death of his wife. And he had become this Persona of the Fisher King. He was running around and he was a knight in New York City, right? He was at medieval knight running around. And anytime something would happen. And I just remember there was a scene where he was walking along with someone, and all of a sudden they're in the park and they hear someone screaming. And he drops down on one knee and says, God, thank you for giving me another chance to prove who I am. And that was. That got me. That hit me in the gut. And I thought, how many times? As good as decent human beings and warriors, we are grateful. We are grateful for. We're grateful for our grandchildren. We're grateful for the time that we have. How many times are we grateful for the adversity? And we should be, because the adversity is what turns us into the people that we become. If you have. Your whole life can go by and it's all good, you're not going to. You are not going to come out to be a solid person like Mary, that requires you to. You have to walk down a few, few fiery paths in order to get that to happen.

And if you make a commitment to being the person who can lead children, who can stand for your community, you have an obligation to put yourself through the fire and not take issue with the flame. You know, to not act as if you're surprised that the fire transforms you, that it burns. We're each given the challenges that are necessary to motivate us to reintegrate to a higher level. It's up to us to recognize them. And we don't always, I can tell you in no uncertain terms one of the moments that I realized that I had totally misunderstood myself. For many years, I struggled with fear in connection with the martial arts because, you know, I had been. I'm gonna put you back on mute, Pat. There seems to be some noise in the background there. But I will. I'll unmute you.

I'll do it.

Okay. Yeah. For years, I had been abused. I'd had problem being bullied in school. And that was my motivation. Wanted to practice martial arts. And I went into them after I graduated high school. And I was pretty good. I actually took second place in the National Korean Karate Championship in 1972. And, you know, back when dinosaurs ruled the earth. Yes. And I went to a martial arts expo and I saw a man named Steve Sanders who was expressing a level of power and precision in his motion that I had never seen before. And I coveted it. And so I found out where his school was and I began studying there. And one day I walked in and there was this 13, 14 year old kid who asked me to spar with him. I did. And the kid absolutely tore me a new one. I mean, I couldn't touch him. I couldn't. There was nothing I could do. It was on a completely different level. And after he totally wore me out, he was bragging to everybody, I beat a man because I was like 12, 13 years older than him. And it broke me psychologically. It really damaged me psychologically. For years it felt as if nothing I had learned made any difference at all. Because inside me, I had put those skills around my fear rather than actually dealing with my fear as. As a thing. And I remember going to the school and feeling more and more fear every time until I couldn't handle it. And I would drop out of the class until my body started deconditioning and the fear of the outside world got to me. And it would drive me back into a class and I would stay there until I got good enough that I attracted the attention of the senior belts. They wanted to work with me. At which point I got terrified again and I would drop out. And I went through that cycle over and over and over again. And I clearly remember driving down the street one day with tears just rolling down my face, afraid to go into a school and collect a jacket that I had left there for fear that somebody would ask me this far. And I remember saying to myself, well, God, will you either take away my urge to practice this stuff or just let me do it. Why can't I do it? And why can't I quit if I can't do this stuff? There's no sin to not being able to do this. Nobody would even notice. Except I knew I would notice. I knew that if I did not face this challenge, I would never be a whole human being. That there was something going on here. Well, years went by, and I got more rank and I got more expertise, but I never completed my journey at that one school. And I would go back and visit them from time to time. And I was always so overwhelmed by their speed and their power, their joy of their explosive movement, expression. And I was studying with a gentleman at the time who knew Steve Sanders very, very well. His name is Cliff Stewart. And Cliff, in many ways, was. Is Steve's twin. Cliff is huge. Steve is small. Cliff has 15 advanced black belts. Steve has his knowledge of one specific art, but so deep, it's like going all the way to the center of the earth. And I was studying Indonesian pitjok, salat, and within arm's reach, a bodyguarding art with Cliff, who is just an amazing human being. And I mentioned to him one day that I had never completed my training with Steve Sanders, who gave became Steve Muhammad. And I said that Steve was coming to town to do a seminar, and I wished I could see him. I wished I could speak to him. That in looking at the family tree of Kimpo karate, I saw Steve and all of his students listed there in Ed Parker's book. And I thought to myself, I want so much to be a part of this lineage. I would give anything to be a part of his lineage. And so Cliff said, well, why don't you go and talk to him? And I expressed to him how afraid I was. I said that, you know, I don't think I'm worthy, Cliff. That I was at that school. And the young warriors at the school just totally intimidated me. And Cliff laughed in my face. And he said something. Steve. They weren't warriors. They were athletes playing warrior games. Those guys would have been good at anything. Breakdancing, basketball, hula hoop, anything. A warrior is someone whose word is good. A warrior is someone who raises his own children. Children. A warrior is someone who stands up for his community. I heard that, and for the first time in my life, I understood why my teachers had been kind to me, why they had extended themselves to me, why they had shown me so many things and been so generous with me. It's because it never had been a game for me. Every time I went to class. It was like life and death. I couldn't just play games like they did. I had brought everything I had to every class I attended. It was life and death every time. And they saw that in me and they knew that there is nothing that we can do other than bringing everything we've got. And in that moment, I forgave myself for all the fear that I had experienced. And I realized that over the decades that I practiced this, I had carried this load on my shoulders. It wasn't just that it was hard. It wasn't just that there was fear or fatigue. It's that I thought that I was a lesser being. I thought there was something wrong with me because my father was not there in the house to tell me that fear is a normal, natural human experience. I thought I was the only one who felt that this way. Anyone who knows that I gave up my career in Hollywood twice to be a father, once with my daughter moving to the Northwest, once with my son to go to Atlanta when my wife's mother was dying of cancer. The answer why I did that, why I gave up everything that I thought was most important to me, was because I would die and burn in hell before I would put my children through what I went through. I want to be there to give them the answers of. Not the answers to the structure of the universe, but just this is how I see it. This is what I have done. This is what life has been like for me. Stand on my shoulders, see further, go further. You know, bless your heart, I would do whatever it took to protect you. And because I meant that, because I saw the altar of what the heavens had given me to do in life, and it was as painful as anything could possibly be to walk away from my dreams. But the trick is that when you do your dirty, your duty, when you commit to doing the task that has been given to you by God, by the universe, that is in deepest alignment with who and what it is that we are. When you do those things, you learn about yourself in a way that you can at no other time. I was completely emptied out by the experience. But the fact is that it was my ego that was emptied out. Who I really was remained who I really was became clear for the first time. I was a warrior for my family, for my heart, for my community, for my values. There is nothing in life that is more important to me than the people I love and the path that I have found. And that's why I so dearly love teaching this, why I so dearly love Sharing this because I want others to be able to share themselves completely without paying the price of self recrimination, of tearing myself to pieces, of crying myself to sleep at times, of feeling like I was not enough. No, the truth is we are enough. That's the huge secret that is so difficult for people to face, to embrace. That maybe we are enough just as we are. That the voices in our heads and the fears in our hearts do not come from us, but they're programmed into us. Dawn talks about the difference between our core programming, what we are as divine beings, and the lessons we learn along the way. That there is a big difference between the two. That the core programming is always there, and it is always powerful and it is always meaningful. And we know how to be born. Those of us who can bring children into the world through our bodies. We know how to give birth and we know how to. How to say goodbye to our loved ones, and we know how to die ourselves. We know these things. It's our egos who fear these things. Because, as Mary said, the realities of life are transformative experiences. We cannot go through them and remain unchanged. And that is part of what is happening with fear. That we trick ourselves into thinking that we are helpless. So that we will avoid the actions that we need to take to be in alignment with our deepest selves. Because those actions will transform us. Once we understand that we are on the path of transformation, that that is what we're here for. To find those tasks, to find those fights, to find those opportunities to say thank you, God, for another opportunity to find out who. Who I am. Thank you for this thing that will transform me, that will destroy my sense of who I am and unleash what I actually can be. And when you can stay in that space and then learn how to turn around and to give that to the.

People that we love.

Now you have a gift to give your child. Now you have a gift to. To give your loved ones your community and to be able to affect them and to teach them to nurture that fire within themselves until they can pass that fire on to someone else. Now, you are part of the lineage that has been the human spirit, the human race, for all of our existence. One generation being all that they can and giving it to the next. Each and every one of us leaders sometimes saying, I will take care of my family here. We will give you the right to leadership so long as you deserve it, so long as you are walking with integrity, so long as you are protecting me and mine. And that's coming back around to that notion of what do we need right now? What we need is for all of us to stand up and be leaders. To say, this is who I am. This is what I see. This is how I believe the world works. This is moving through life honestly, efficiently and kindly, keeping all three centers as alive as they can be, taking the lessons that come to us and using those lessons to help us to grow over and over again every day, every moment. So when you set your watch to go off every three hours and you breathe and you take that moment to think about your blessings, your commitments, your values, every one of those breaths is another opportunity to totally renew yourself. To notice when you're moving through the world with power, to forgive yourself for not being some avatar of perfection that you probably pulled out of a damn movie somewhere, rather than realizing that at every moment of your life, you have done the best you could with the resources you have. And that fear is a normal, natural, healthy experience. It says that you are once again engaging with life and moving yourself to a higher level. This is fear is as natural as joy. If you don't let yourself feel the fear, how are you going to feel the love? But if you let yourself to be controlled by your fear, to let the fear deceive you into thinking you're less than the challenges that you face, rather than the challenges you face, have been chosen for you by life, by the divine, to teach us the things we need to know. That is such a difficult position to hold without blaming people for their lives, without criticizing people for their existence. This is between you and God. This is our position as warriors. This is not a joke, judgment to be made of others if they are in that place of not seeing that there is something to learn in this time. This is not about imposing this on other people. When you find yourself doing that, being judgmental, saying, oh, well, you know, this is just something that nature gave you. God gave you to test you. So stand back up after someone's legs have been broken. No, if you are in the position where you see this, where you've owned this power, you've seen this and you see someone who has not done that, it is your responsibility, if you have actually sensed this, to be ruthlessly kind, to be loving, to help them, to get back up until they can handle a clearer view of or handle your perspective, your perspective may not be right for them. Not everybody is made out for the warrior archetype. There are healers and teachers and parents and farmers. There are all these different things. And the truth is, we Touch on all of them. But we can specialize in things in the course of our life, or we can specialize in something at a particular time in order to learn something that we really need to learn, to move through something that we need to move through. This is never about doing, judging other people. It's always about holding ourselves to a higher standard. And when you do that, if you genuinely do that with integrity, you will find that the people around you will start raising themselves up, not because you have challenged them or not because you have criticized them, but because you have inspired them. So first, you must do it with yourself. That's what a leader has to do. And if you believe that our nation leads leadership, perhaps your family needs leadership, perhaps the child inside you needs leadership. That it behooves you to step up. It behooves you to, multiple times a day, remember who you are. Take a minute to breathe. Take a minute to reconnect with your existence, with your survival, with your instinct, with your intuition, with your heart, with your body, with your mind. To have that kind of control over yourself, to take that kind of responsibility. That is the person that others will look like in the midst of a disaster. They're looking who seems calm, who seems certain, and they will follow that person. We all have the capacity to be followers. We all have the capacity to be leaders. Lead yourself from that place where life seems overwhelming and into the place where life seems to be a divine adventure. None of us will survive this. One of these challenges will be the last that we face. Make your peace with that and be able to therefore adore every day. We had the opportunity of sharing with Mary an actual miracle of life beginning again. To be able to share moments like that with people whose presence we may never have been in, people we may not know. We can do it by sharing a moment with a stranger, by listening in on a conversation between two people who are speaking truth, by helping a child, by helping an old person across the street, by giving of ourselves at the deepest level. We all have that capacity. But first we have to touch that wellspring within ourselves. You can start it in any moment. It's that breathing thing I'm going to impose on Mary to help us with a little breathing exercise in a minute. But you don't need to expend anything except your time and your commitment and your heart. If you would like to experiment with the path that we're on, you can join us. You can take a look at www.realwarriorsjourney.com and you can Find out what it is that we have there for you. Or you could just join us at these meetings. We're happy to share with you. Or you don't even need to do that. You can simply set your watch and every three hours, stop and breathe for 60 seconds and just come closer and closer every time to connecting to your life force. If you will do this, you'll find out that you have everything that you need within yourself to become, everything that you need to be to complete yourself in life. I believe that to the absolute bottom of my heart, to the core of my being, we have the things that we need to complete ourselves in life. Before I ask, Mary Patrick, is there anything that you wanted to add, buddy? Unmute yourself. I think so.

You hear me?

Yes, I can.

Okay. No. So, Steve, that was, that was. That was very profound. The only thing I want to say is that, you know, you talked about, about our body, mind, spirit, and the body will do the. Our bodies are capable of things that we don't understand. And there are times when we need to have that proven to us.

In.

Order for it to become real and people will go through as part of the combat process. I saw a whole lot of people who, after the combat was over, came to me and wanted to diminish it. They said, well, you weren't going full speed on this. I was absolutely going full speed. You weren't going as hard as you can. I threw you to the ground as hard as I possibly could. When I got on top of you, I was using all of my strength to hold you down. And people still don't want to accept that. And that is because that is going. That information is going to the wrong place. So we're pulling that information in. We're pulling it into a place where we feel safer being.

Unable.

Right. When we say that. That's where the helplessness comes from is because people, people appreciate the helplessness because that lets you off the hook. There was nothing I could do. There is nothing I could do. I would, I would explain martial technique to people sometimes during this is during workshops at the beginning of them, and they would say, well, but what if there's seven guys? Well, what about if you're in a. In a straight jacket at the beginning? Well, what about is, okay, we can do this. We can make the scenario unmanageable. So there is a desire in there to keep you in that spot. I'm just saying, because it is a very powerful one. And if you are not paying attention, it's back. If you're not paying attention. And if you move away from it, it becomes stronger. So that's the only thing I would say about it, was we have to. What you were saying is absolutely correct. We have to be coming from a very powerful place, and we have to have access to that powerful place when we need it.

We have to give ourselves permission to be great.

That is so true. So that's it for me. And then I also wanted to say that, Mary, I appreciate everything that you came across with that was very poignant to me. I've got two grandchildren this year that I didn't have last year. So I just wanted to say I understand completely. And I think I saw a couple of other people that were chiming in and saying, yes, I had an experience that was just like what Mary is describing here. Yeah, there were times when I was choked up just listening to you, Mary.

Thank you. Thank you, Patrick and Stephen. And again, I. Even though I was talking about a birth experience, I feel like that that translates into other areas of our lives where we're dealing with something profound. And I'm just going to piggyback very quickly on something that you said, Patrick, and that you've been talking about, Steven, and that's when we accept our power, we accept responsibility. And sometimes that's where that difficulty lies, because we know when we step into our power, we step into being responsible for it and acting appropriately, using it appropriately. And that can be scary. It's easier to hand those reins over to somebody else and say you be responsible for that. And so it's being willing to be up to the task.

Yes, it is. Would you please give us a little closing benediction, you know, just a visualization, just to kind of move us from this space, you know, into. Back into our lives. Just. You know what to do, Mary.

I do. I do. So, everybody, close your eyes. If you're comfortable closing your eyes. If not, find a place in your environment to rest your eyes softly. Let the corners of your eyes be soft. Let the muscles of your face relax. Let your teeth slightly part. Let the tip of your tongue rest on the roof of your mouth. And without changing it in any way, just notice your breath. Notice that companion that's with you day in and day out, every moment.

Whether.

You'Re awake or not, that steadfast friend, mentor, giver of life connect with the sensation of your breath flowing in and out of every cell of your. Feel the sensations of your breath, the coolness as it comes through your nose or your mouth, The sensation of the subtle movement of your body as it comes in. And flows back out. Notice any sensation of energy or exhilaration as you inhale. And a settling, soothing, calming. You exhale. Notice how it feels to breathe in community. We all breathe together. We support each other. We love each other. We breathe together. And let's take a synchronized breath together. Take an inhale. And exhale. And open your eyes. If they're closed, just stay quiet for a couple more breaths here and feel. Thank you, Steven. Thank you, Patrick. Thank you, Warrior community. Have a beautiful night, everybody.

Thank you very much. I'm gonna unmute everybody so we can kind of say hi to each other if we've got microphones, okay? Hello. Hello, Nancy. I'm doing great. That's good. It's so good to see you. Good to see you here, Misty, I think. Are you there, Misty? Oh, I'm not hearing her. But anyway, I'm just happy for everybody here. Let's just, you know. Thank you for joining us, Patrick. Thank you for joining us, Mary. Thank you, everyone. I'd like to close our session today, as I often do, with the Sanskrit expression that means that the divinity within me salutes and acknowledges the divinity within each and every one of you. Namaste. Thank you.

Namaste.

Have a wonderful, wonderful day. Bye. Bye.

Bye.