Communicating at Parties and Networking Events

One of the hardest things for many people to do is to communicate effectively at parties and social networking events. It's not a set speech. You're not there with a PowerPoint presentation. It's not a board of directors meeting. It's just people socializing. Talking could be business related, could be purely social, but it's not a set structure. And it's a time for small talk, for simple exchange of pleasantries. And you go from there. What do you do if you walk in, you don't know a soul there, and you're feeling a little shy? Well, for starters, realize most people feel this way. You're not alone. There's not something wrong with you. It's how most people are. And the trick is just smile. Act like you're having a good time. If you want a drink, get a drink. Don't have too many, but there's nothing wrong with one drink. Hold it in your left hand so when you shake people's hands, your right hand is not all cold and clammy. And then just look around. Size people up with their body language on whether or not they want to talk. If it's another individual standing alone and they look pleasant, and they don't look like they are immersed in their own cell phone or preoccupied, then just go up and say, hi, my name is. Introduce yourself. Ask them what brought them there, and just start having simple small talk. If you see two people and they're really close to each other, they look like they're having a heated animated talk. They might be in a debate. Maybe two best friends who haven't seen each other and one is talking about how they're going through a divorce. Well, don't interrupt. Look and see what their body language is telling you. It could be four people who have all just met. They're all kind of just feeling each other out. They're more than happy to have a fifth person in pop in and say hello. Now, you may want to come in a little closer, listen for a minute. Make sure you're not intruding on anything that's overly personal or proprietary. But if it seems like people are just having a general conversation, then feel free to get closer and at the right time, say hello. It's not so important what you say. You don't have to be this great wit. You don't have to regale people with amusing anecdotes right out of the gate. Just be friendly, be open. Introduce yourself. Ask questions about other people. People will think you're fascinating. If you get them talking now, you don't want to sound like you're grilling someone and you're interviewing them. You have to exchange back. You have to share too. But ask people what brings them there. Ask them what else is going on. Ask them about their business. People like to talk about their business. People say, tj, what do you do? Boo, I have to be careful. I could just start talking for the next hour. Ask people about what they do, get them talking, ask follow up questions, show you're actually listening, and then share something relevant about what it is you do. Do that. Have a good time and have some fun and parties. Social Networks Social networking events can be a great way of communicating with people.