Ep 37 Is Bad Grammar Destroying Your Credibility

Is bad grammar destroying your credibility with audiences?

Speaking the show about effective speaking in public, to the media, at work and in life. Speaking with TJ Walker.

Folks, I hate to seem prissy here, but there are certain things that people say in speeches, in podcast interviews that it's just cringe worthy. You hear it and if you have any respect for a particular language and apologies. I only know English, so I'm going to be giving English references here. It's just like dropping an entire plate full of silverware, platter full of silverware on the floor. It's so grating. Let's talk about that today. Again, the goal is not to be perfect, but we can't so destroy our credibility that no one wants to listen to us any longer.

What not to say and do.

For Jack and I, it was a tough issue. Oh my God, when I hear somebody say for and then insert a name and an I, I just want to cry. It's such hideously awful grammar. And folks, I don't know every single rule of grammar. I may occasionally make a mistake, but I cannot be the object of a preposition. You have to use me. I've even seen President Obama do this, although not in the last three or four years, but for whatever reason. It especially afflicts people who like to think of themselves as smart and educated because I guess when they were little children, they said, me want to go to the bathroom or Me want to have dinner? And the mother said, no, it's I. Don't say me, say I. But now, unfortunately, they inject I's where they have no place. You cannot say for I. For my wife and I. We like to. No, for my wife and me. The way you figure it out is you take out the first part. You take out the first object. Would you say for? For I. Thank you for giving that present 4i or 2i. No, whether it's 2 or 4. So that's my little pet peeve. What are your pet peeves when it comes to grammar and speakers? Presenters? Whether you're seeing them in person, whether you are seeing them on a podcast, on a YouTube video. What are your grammar pet peeves and vocabulary pet peeves?

Your questions.

Folks. I want to hear your questions that relate not only to grammar but any other issue of public speaking speaking to the media. You can send your questions at any time to infoediatrainingworldwide.com you can also post your questions on Twitter TJ Walker. You can post your questions on our Facebook page. And that's TJ Walker Interactive on Facebook or our LinkedIn or anyplace else where you are seeing or listening to this show. I want to know a question from you. What is the grammar mistake that just makes you cringe? Now, standards are different depending on the situation. If someone is an artist and they're talking about art and they speak seven languages and English is their third language and they have great energy and excitement and passion and they use a word incorrectly or their grammar isn't quite right, well, I would be an idiot for penalizing that person. And it doesn't bother me at all. Here's someone who's frankly a lot smarter than I am, who's mastered seven languages. They're now speaking in a language that isn't their first language and they're still communicating the idea. So part of it is people have to know who you are, your perspective, to figure out where to judge you. But as in the case the other day, I was listening to a podcast from somebody who was obviously a native born US citizen American English speaker, and they were doing a podcast about public speaking and about presentation skills and speaking skills and how to come across professionally. And they start with the whole four eyes for Bill and I and just first 30 seconds. And at that point I'm like, I just can't take it. If they are so ignorant about basic grammar that in the first 30 seconds they have to commit one of the most egregious blunders of the English language, why in the world would I want to listen to them? And I hit delete. Now you can say that was short sighted of me and maybe they had all sorts of other wonderful nuggets. Perhaps I'm willing to take that risk. So how do you improve this? For starters, not suggesting you write out every single word and run it through grammar check for a typical speech presentation interview. But this is a good reason to practice. Whatever you do on video, send it to other people and ask them, what do you think, what do you like, what do you not like, what do you remember? But also, if you're a little concerned about your grammar, do you see anything wrong and get the corrections before you put it out to the whole world. Also, if there's some rules you feel like you just can't master, stay away from those words. For whatever reason, I can never remember when to use lie and when to use lay. And you know what, as other wits have mentioned, my characters sit or stand. They don't lie or lay. So know your limitations. If you really feel like you have not mastered a particular grammar skill, then by all means, figure out a way of avoiding it. Don't embarrass yourself, especially if you are speaking in your native tongue and you're holding yourself out as an educated, thought leader, professional, and as someone as articulate and well spoken to use bad grammar. And folks, by the way, I'll put this out to you. If you hear me making grammar mistakes, feel free to correct me. It's been a long I can't remember any time someone has corrected my grammar, but maybe that's just because they were too polite. So I put that out to you. Those of you listening on itunes and on podcast, those of you watching on YouTube or Facebook, if you see me making grammar errors using incorrect words, let me know irregardless of where you find them. Okay, I'm being a bit of a smart aleck. Irregardless is not a word. It's and it is one of those words that I find that stupid people who want to appear to be smart use the word is regardless. You don't need the ear in front of it. That's another one of my pet peeves when I hear it. Anyway, I'd like to hear your pet peeves. And I'd like you to know. I'd like you to let me know the worst example of someone who said something that you think just completely destroyed their credibility.

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Folks, I understand you have to be colloquial. You have to speak for the ear, not for the grammar teacher. I don't want you to fret if someone says real or if you say real instead of real. Oh, that was real good. I enjoyed that. It was real good. That's not proper English. You can't say real good. It's really good. But you know what? I understand most people do that. And you would seem like a pinhead. Sorry to sound like Bill O'Reilly here, but you would just sound a bit tedious running around correcting everyone saying, well, you're supposed to say really instead of real. Another here is an example of where I use poor grammar, but I don't quite know what the solution is. Instead of saying he or she using a singular and then saying they, because if you just say and that's why if he wants to or and that's you come across as a sexist. So using the plural they and them instead of the singular when the subject called for that is a grammar mistake. But it's one that is necessitated by the desire not to be offensive, not to be gender specific, and not to seem sexless. So I understand that. I don't really know any way around that. But that is an example where I occasionally use the plural when you need a singular, if you have a singular object. But I'd like to know of any other examples that you find. People regularly use the wrong word, and I know I do occasionally. But I think at least the ones I misuse are ones that the vast, vast, vast majority of people don't know. That doesn't make it any better for me. But if you're going to make a mistake, at least make a mistake that 99% of people won't catch and you'll be penalized a lot less. 4i is something that is really, really easy for most people who have a high school education or English have passed high school English for them to catch. So I'd like to know, do you think I'm making too much of this? I'd much rather you have an interesting speech with great messages, great stories that really help someone and have bad grammar occasionally, than to have a speech where every single word is just right. The perfect word is used, every aspect of your grammar is right. You're speaking in full sentences, but your speech strikes people as boring or tedious or uninteresting or unoriginal. That's a far bigger problem than having an occasional grammar word. So put it all together. What's important. The first thing you've got to do when you're giving a presentation, make sure you've narrowed it down to your most important ideas. Have great stories, examples, case studies to make those ideas come alive. But then, as you're practicing and you have the slightest doubt about your grammar, the words you're using, ask a friend, a family member, a colleague to check it out, review it, critique it, and tell you, are you making any grammar mistakes? If so, let's correct it now before the whole world sees it. By the way, anyone listening to this on itunes, on your cell phone, or any other device, or watching it on YouTube, if you've caught me making a mistake this time, let me know and I'm going to send you a pass to any five of my online courses at absolutely no charge. And some of Those go for $297. So I'm going to give you, at no charge, access to, you know, I'm going to do better than that. I'm going to give you access to my all access pass. More than a hundred courses of mine. I'M going to give you access to that for a full year if you can spot any mistakes in grammar that I made in this podcast. Because you know what? I'm trying to get better. I'm trying to improve. Very few people are 100% flawless when it comes to the grammar. But folks, the biggies, the obvious ones, we have to solve that. Otherwise our credibility is shot. I'm TJ Walker. Thanks for joining me. As always, may all of your presentations in life be a success.

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