How to Handle Questions Without Sounding Defensive | Episode 9

Ultimize. Before your next presentation, do this. When someone asks you a question, pause for 2 seconds before answering. Not to stall, not to look thoughtful, to make sure you actually answer the question being asked. Because most engineers don't. They answer the question they wish had been asked, or they start explaining everything they know. And that's where things go wrong. Questions are not interruptions. They are a part of the system. They're one of the clearest forms of feedback you'll get. They tell you what your audience didn't understand, what they care about, what concerns they have. This is valuable, extremely valuable data, but only if you treat it that way. Now let's look at what typically happens. An engineer presents, someone asks a question, and immediately the engineer starts talking. No pause, no processing, just an automatic response, and that response often turns into a long explanation. A defensive justification, or an answer that doesn't directly address the question. From the audience's perspective, this feels frustrating. They asked a simple question. They expected a clear answer. Instead, they got more complexity. So let's fix that. First, pause 2 seconds. That pause gives you time to process the question. What's actually being asked? Not the words, The intent: Are they confused? Are they skeptical? Are they looking for reassurance? Understanding the intent helps you give a better answer. Second, answer the question directly. Start with a clear, simple answer. Not a long explanation, not background, just the answer. For example, yes, that risk exists. No, That approach would not scale. The main issue is cost. That clarity matters because it shows that you understand the question and can respond directly. Then, if needed, you can add a brief explanation, but the answer comes first. Third, keep it focused. You don't need to explain everything, just enough to address the question. Even better if you can answer by giving a specific example or telling a story of how the issue you're dealing with directly helped an existing client, customer, prospect, or colleague. If the person wants more detail, they'll ask. But if you give too much immediately, you could create more confusion again. Fourth, stay neutral. Many engineers become defensive when questioned. How dare you question me? They feel like their work is being challenged. They feel personally challenged. So they respond by defending every detail. But questions are not attacks. They're part of the process. Your goal is not to defend. Your goal is to clarify. When you stay neutral, your answers are clearer and more effective. Now let's connect this to testing and evidence. How do you know if you're handling questions well? You observe the outcome. Do people seem satisfied with your answers? Do they stop asking the same question in different ways? Does the conversation move forward? That's your data. If people keep asking for clarification, your answers are not clear enough. If discussions go off track, you may be over-explaining. If people become disengaged, start looking at their cell phone, you may not be addressing what matters to them. Those are signals, and you use those signals to improve. You can also test this in practice. Record a Q&A session. Watch it, not to critique yourself harshly, but to observe patterns. Do you answer directly? Do you pause? Do you stay focused, or do you drift into long explanations and give boring data dumps? That's useful information, and once you see it, you can change it. Now let's address a specific situation. What if you don't know the answer to a question? This happens. And many engineers feel pressure to respond right away to anything. They try to piece together an answer on the spot. That often leads to confusion. A better approach is simple. Just say, "I don't know," or, "I'll need to check that." That builds credibility because it shows you're focused on accuracy, not just throwing something out there and responding willy-nilly. And then you follow up later. Let them know that you don't know. You're not embarrassed to say it. You don't act embarrassed. If you say, "Oh, I don't know," and you look like you were caught and exposed as a fraud, they'll remember that. But if you say, "I don't know. I do know who knows. I will reach out to them and get back with you with an answer on that by today," no one's going to remember that in a negative way. Just make sure You follow up. Now let's talk about control. Questions can sometimes pull you off track. Someone asks about a detail that's not central to your message. If you go too deep into that, you lose focus. So you need to manage that. Answer it briefly, then bring it back. For example, that's a good question. The short answer is this, and then the main point to keep in mind is— that keeps your presentation aligned with your objective. Now let's bring this back to the system. Your presentation includes your message, your structure, your responses to questions. All of these affect the output. If your answers create confusion, the system is not working, so you adjust. You simplify your answers. You focus on clarity. You test again. That's how you improve. So from now on, pause before answering. Answer directly first. Keep explanations focused. Treat questions as data. Because when you do that, something changes. Your responses become clearer, your audience feels heard, and your presentations become more effective. Not just in what you say, but in how you handle what comes back to you. In the next episode, we're going to bring everything together. The one communication skill that will have the biggest impact on your career. You know, there's one thing I always find interesting. People will listen to a podcast like this, get ideas, maybe even feel a little motivated, and then just move on with their day. Nothing actually changes. And I get it. Information alone doesn't do it. Repetition does. That's actually why we built Ultimize. So if you're getting any value from this, just go to ultimize.com. That's spelled U-L-T-A-M-I-Z-E dot com. There's a free course waiting for you there. You can start with communication skills, but the whole idea is simple. Don't just hear something once, actually build it into your life. Again, it's free. Go to ultimize.com.