Transcript excerpt of a conversation (TJ Walker and another speaker) about coaching models and boundaries between business/executive coaching and life coaching. They discuss delivery formats (one-on-one Zoom, weekly/biweekly, group programs, video+weekly live calls), how coaches distinguish coaching from therapy, how to handle personal issues in coaching, and advice for aspiring life coaches focusing on training, differentiation, and questioning motives.
Chapters
With a client for a six week period or for a year or indefinitely. There are people where you, you may meet face to face once a quarter and then you have unlimited texting with them. There's so many different ways of doing it. What really became popular a couple of years ago was, and a lot of people are still pushing it, is this model of a, a coaching like an eight week coaching program where you watch videos on demand and then you have a live session once a week with a coach, with a lot of other people. That's been a popular model. I found it didn't really work with the sort of skills that I, that I do, or at least I couldn't figure out how it works. What model do you use as far as the time and delivery method with your clients?
It's all one on one, live via Zoom. It's typically weekly or bi weekly. And there is no set agenda, there is no course outline or anything of that nature. Yes, I teach courses, I teach classes. But for the coaching it is exactly that. It is coaching one on one on the things that are front of mind to them at that time.
And it's always a bit fuzzy sometimes the division between a business coach, executive coach, life coach, because as human beings are, if we're upset about our a child who's been kicked out of school, you're not going to be as productive marketing or anything else. How do you draw lines as far as what you do help people with, what you don't help people with. Most coaches I know are very quick to say, okay, I don't do therapy, you're going to need to go to someone else for that. How do you draw the lines for your coaching practice?
That's really about the only line that I draw. I mean it's easy to say I'm a business coach, not a life coach. Every business coach is a life coach in some way, shape or form because we cannot separate ourselves from business and life. I try not to focus on too much of the personal simply because I am not a therapist, I am not an expert, but I am happy to be a sounding board. One of the things that I will say, especially as we're addressing more personal issues, more life issues, do you want me to just listen, agree with you or tell you the truth? And then based on that, just that question alone helps sometimes refocus the discussion.
How often people say anything other than I want the truth?
Oh no. Sometimes they'll say just listen. Sometimes they won't respond to that at all. Sometimes they'll realize, oh, I, I'm probably going down a path I don't even want to go down. But the reason I consider myself a business coach is because of my business background, my business training and I know that I can be of assistance there. The reason that I consider my life, myself a life coach is because, well, we're all life coaches too.
Well, although I do, I do remember from my time as president of the National Speakers association, the New York chapter, this was a dozen years ago or so. I met so many people when I asked them, what do you do? They said, oh, I'm a life coach. And oh, that's interesting. How long you been doing that? Once I scratched it. Invariably they were an out of work actor. They'd had zero business experience or successes and pretty much zero successes and other things and just figured, well, it sounds better than saying I'm unemployed. I don't mean to have a broad brush of saying all life coaches are worthless, but it does seem to me that that's a field that has attracted a lot of flex, flaky people, in part because anyone can call themselves a life coach. There's, there's no, it's not like I can't just say I'm a surgeon, I'm a medical doctor surgeon, I would be put in jail. You don't have the credentialing and the legal process. It's, it's on the one hand it's, anyone can get in, but the other hand, you know, there's, there's no barriers to entry, but there's also very high barriers to success. Certainly high barriers for someone even making a middle class income in that field. What do you do? Let's say I'm a student of yours, 21 years old. I like psychology, I like business, and I tell you I want to be a life coach. Tell me how you would give me guidance if I came to you after class and I'm already one of your good students and I really want to soak up your knowledge. What's your advice to me?
I'm going to ask a lot of questions. What do you think it means to be a life coach and what's drawn you to that and what training do you have? What's going to set you apart from anyone else? Sure there's a low barrier to entry as a life coach, but there are things that you can do to differentiate yourself. There are things that you can do to hold yourself in more esteem than others. There are respected training programs and certifications out there. What are your plans regarding that? What's driving you to want to become a life coach? And why did you enroll in college if that was your end goal? I'm not afraid, even as a professor, to ask them about why they were here. Not in the why are you here? Stop doing it type of questioning, but in the why are you here? Let's take a moment to dig deeper into what motivated you down that path.
And have you had any students come to you with that goal?
Life coach? No, A few other things, sure. I love coaching for a number of different venture startups, incubators, and I'll do coaching in that regard as well. And I will.
