#141: Connecting With Your True Purpose With Dr. Erica L. Risberg, Ph.D.

Oh, that's a good question. What I would love people to know is that joy is at the center of my being.

Hmm.

I have, since I can remember, always felt connected. And what I mean by that is I, I can actually feel the energy of trees, and I hug them, I talk to them, they're my friends. I I know it looks weird, but it's true. And when I was little, I walked into a gaggle of geese at our family cabin and they surrounded me and they were my friends. They were my friends. I did not see them as anything other than friends. My parents were freaking out, but I knew they were my friends and I was taught separation. I never felt it. So that's been the deeper quest is like, how do I get past that? Why is that? Why? Why is that separation there? I don't understand it. And I thought I could get it intellectually, which is why I did the pursuit of the PhD. It was like, I gotta figure out how I can get past that person so I can connect with them.

You weren't trying to become Dr. Dolittle?

No, although that's probably an 8.

Do you remember that movie when you were a kid? Yes,

yeah, I do. And I feel that with animals. I do, I really do. It's like they're just in different bodies.

Resilience, it's the unsung hero in every success story. story that you will ever hear about. And in times of massive change and disruption, the kind of rapid change that we're all experiencing as leaders, as business owners, as entrepreneurs, we have to learn how to not only increase our own resilience but that of our teams. So right now we have a powerful opportunity for you to find out just how resilient you are. Some years ago, my team and I created the resilience assessment that more than 5,000 business leaders across the globe have taken. And all you have to do to get your own free resilience leader assessment is go to resiliencerank.com. It takes less than 3 minutes, and it's our gift to you for being the leader that you already are. Other free resources and tools will accompany your score instantly. So go to resiliencerank.com and find out just how resilient you are. I was getting that sense that— yeah, I was making a little bit of a joke, but there's also an element of real truth in that, that the communication that's possible with Nature, animals included. It's really profound. I heard it once, and you tell me if this is something you've also heard or experienced, that trees— that the connection, the network between trees in a forest is measurable, that there's communication that is actually happening between these trees.

Yeah, it's amazing. It's because we perceive in our heads that we're the only ones that are sentient beings, right? It's an illusion that we have. But honestly, there's a cedar at the community garden I manage, and I can feel that energy. I'll go up to it. I can hug it, and I feel— it's not tangible. I can't show you, but I feel that I have a connection with this tree.

Is that called the mycelial network? I'm just trying to think.

Yeah, because it's the network of The fungi that interconnect the trees so that they communicate.

Yes. And take care of each other, right? I mean, I don't want to go too far afield, especially I know really little about it, but I've heard, and we actually had somebody that was one of our attendees at a speaking workshop and she was working on a TEDx talk about the communication that exists between trees. And I was fascinated. I'm still fascinated by it. Because it forms a great basis for what connection and support and collab— I don't want to use the word collaboration because it's probably inappropriate in that sense, but the lack of competition, let's say.

Mm-hmm. It's a great model for humanity.

Community maybe is a better word to describe how these trees are in relationship to one another. Is that fair?

Oh yeah, it's a great model for humanity because Each tree is different, right? Unique. And yet they work together to provide a sustainable environment for each other.

And are not competing. Is that—

Right. They're not competing. I mean, the little— on some level they are because there's only a limited space for which they can grow. So like the saplings, probably not all the saplings grow. But overall, there is this sense of community and interconnectivity that support one another that we could really find some good models out of.

So how does that inform— I mean, maybe this is left-field kind of question here, but I'm gonna do it anyway because we'll see where it goes. I'm just following the breadcrumbs, right? How does that inform your work today? How has it informed decisions you've made in the past when you've—

Well, I've always been curious I'll use the pivot. The pivot for me was when my dad died 10 years ago and I started getting deep with my spirituality. And I knew there was something going on and I didn't know what it was because I actually felt him leave his body, which was amazing. It was this beautiful experience of feeling his soul actually burst across the universe. So I knew, I was like, that wasn't my imagination. My head wants to say it's my imagination, but my heart knows it wasn't. So that's the first start of my, I got to find out what this is. I got to dig deeper. And then 4 years ago, I took a vow of peace because I was just so overwhelmed by the violence in our society. And I had to do something. It was like, okay, I can't take this anymore. So I did what I thought was the easy thing. And I divested myself of news, of movies, of action books. And I was like, okay, I'm done with violence. I'm good. No, no, that was the beginning.

Yeah.

And through that, I have really opened myself up to my spiritual connections and seeing that deeper interconnectivity with people. So when I meet them, I actually can feel their energy and I can navigate, because my cultural history part is like, how do I find that puzzle piece? My heart-centered space is how do I bring love into this so I can give them a safe environment that they can open up and I can connect with them.

Yeah, is this what you— so your podcast, as I was reading your bio, I said I love the name, All Things in the Name of Love. So it really opens up the space of almost infinite possibilities. Where do you take your guests on that show? What's typically discussed and

It is very organic. I am guided with my questions. It's a gift I have. I feel the resonance with somebody to be on my show. I ask them to come on and read their bio, and I feel the questions. It's not an intellectual process for me. It's where does spirit want me to go, and what does spirit want to have revealed on this podcast? And so it's a really fascinating process because I don't have any preconceived notions of what's going to happen. And invariably I get these really fascinating conversations because I'm open to them and I'm opening space for the, the person I'm interviewing to know that they're safe.

Mm-hmm.

I have this energy of safety for others and they feel comfortable enough to open up and share their journeys with me.

And you trust in the process too, right?

I definitely trust in the process. I didn't want to do the podcast.

Well, you know, I was thinking there's a lot of people out there that would love to do a podcast but have probably told themselves a story that, I don't know what I'll ask anybody, I don't know if I have the interviewing skills, or what if I run out of things to say, and other versions of that. Those kinds of, uh, Stories that just stop them from ever doing it. And yet what you're describing is a podcast that you didn't necessarily want to begin. I want to find out more about that.

Yeah.

But ultimately, as you're doing the podcast, you're being guided, you're following guidance, you're trusting in the process, you know, creating a space and then allowing the space to be filled, which is the natural way of the universe anyway. And so it's all just sort of handling itself in a very graceful, elegant Way. Am I overstating that?

No, no, you're definitely— you nailed it. That's it. 2 years ago, I was called to do a podcast. Podcast, whatever. I mean, I've done voiceovers for 10 years. I worked at the Maine Folklife Center for 6 years. I know how to do interviews. Like, I have all of the skills to do a podcast. It's like, duh, this is easy. However, my ego got in the way, and I'm like, podcast? So I'd like record thoughts I had and send them to my friend. I'm like, here's my podcast for the weekend. That, that was for a year. And my team, my spirit team gave me the name of the podcast. I did not come up with All Things in the Name of Love. That was given to me. And then this year in January, like, we weren't kidding. You're doing a podcast. And there was more hemming and hawing. And then finally, like, okay, I'm the one that's stopping me. I have all of the skill sets.

Right.

I have all the equipment. I don't have to buy anything. I have everything. It's me. It's me that's stopping me. And what is part of me that's keeping me? Fear of being judged. Well, who's doing the judging? I am.

Right.

So part of what I do on my daily stuff is I sit with myself. I tune into whatever I have as a limiting belief or a fear, and I give myself space to sit with it and feel it. Because if I fully feel it, then I'm not carrying it anymore. And through that process, I'm able to show up as who I'm supposed to be as opposed to the fears that lead me.

Hmm. I also, just circling back to something you said earlier, I love the fact that you took a vow of peace. And in part because taking a vow is a sacred thing. It's a special thing. I mean, I married my beautiful and adorable college sweetheart, love of my life at the time, but I was really young. It's 30-plus, 30 years ago. So the vow has been a very important thing for me in that regard because marriage isn't easy. And I'm not saying anything about that sometimes a marriage should dissolve, that people aren't meant to be together. My parents split up after almost, yeah, 24-plus years. So I mean, I get that.

Mm-hmm.

But outside of the context of just relationships, vows are important. It's a word that has a really deep, rich meaning to it. So if you vow to be peaceful, yeah, there's a lot of things that potentially don't fit in that way of being at that time. So my question to everybody that's listening, watching this is, what would you be willing to make a vow about? I don't know what that even looks like. I'm going to consider that myself. But don't make a vow, of course, that you're not You're not going to hold this sacred, right?

Yeah, I mean, when I did it, it was because I numbed myself out, because being an historian, that's what you do, because there's so much violence.

Your doctorate is in history?

Yeah, yep, my doctorate's in history, and I had to numb myself out from a lot of really, I'll call it low vibrating things I had to read. Really, really, really don't want to get into that. And for some reason, when the Paris bombings happened, something about that— and I don't know what it was because I've been asked, why not 9/11? I'm like, I don't know why 9/11, but something about Paris just— I snapped.

Yeah,

I was like, I can't pretend that this doesn't matter anymore.

It was like a personal tipping point for you.

It was a personal tipping point. And I listened to a meditation. At the end of the meditation, I remember it really clearly. I was like, okay, I don't know who's listening. But whoever's listening, I am taking a vow of peace. I have no idea what that means, but I have to take a vow of peace. And I was shocked that I was feeling myself committing myself to what I now know is my spiritual team.

Yep.

And going, what did I just do? Because the vow is not something— I don't take vows lightly. Vows are a big thing. And, and so immediately what came in was Get rid of the action books. Stop watching the news. Stop watching any movie that has violence. And if you live in the United States, you know that's hard.

Wow. The pace of change over the last couple of years has been rapid. And if you're a leader, a business owner, an entrepreneur, you know exactly what I'm talking about. Every day it's something different and something new. But the one thing that I've learned in performing at the height of all of those roles has been that we must be resilient. In fact, it's the unsung hero in every success story that you will ever hear about. And it's the reason why my team and I created the resilience assessment that more than 5,000 business leaders across the globe have taken. And all you have to do to get your own free resilient leader assessment is go to resiliencerank.com. It takes less It takes less than 3 minutes, and it's our gift to you for being the leader that you already are. Other free resources and tools will accompany your score instantly. So go to resiliencerank.com and find out just how resilient you are. I think it's tough everywhere in the world. I mean, the internet has leveled, or I don't know what it's done to the playing field.

Lowered the playing field?

Maybe instead of leveled, right, it's lowered the playing field. That's probably right. Yeah. But yeah, I think it is absolutely an issue that we— everyone in the world is facing. This is sort of inundation of a certain type of information flow. Much of it is marketing, as we know. Sometimes it's disguised as something else, but it's really marketing at its core, propaganda, or it's designed to create a certain behavior on the part of the people who are consuming it, whether it's to keep your eyeballs on it, whether it's to have you do something about it, or whatever it is. But we are— I wasn't going to say assaulted, I'll just say it. We are assaulted in that way without our consent pretty continuously. So to take back an element of control, to vow as you did, and then ask yourself, well, if I'm making this vow, I don't even know what this means. I don't know what it supposed to do with that. But what you feel, what you're led to be thinking about is, yeah, maybe I'll just stop watching. I'll stop consuming some of that stuff, whatever that stuff is, wherever it's coming from, and see how that feels. So tell us about what that journey was like for you when you began to—

Yeah. Okay. So I went cold turkey because that's what I do.

Oh, so you're cold turkey.

I'm a cold turkey. I'm not anymore. But at the time I was like, okay, we're done. And then I didn't know what to read for about 6 months. And so what that forced me to do was go within and meditate and journal more and be with myself because I didn't have the distractions. What it's morphed from, and this is really fascinating, is all of a sudden my body decided it didn't like different foods. And so I had to go through the whole process of divesting my ego of the identity of me being X, like a coffee drinker or a hamburger eater or like I'm plant-based now and I'm gluten, sugar-free, dairy-free, soy-free, coffee-free and 4 months ago I was eating chicken and fish and I'll have fish like once a month now and I'm fine, I'm healthy, And I don't want to say it's because of me thinking there's violence from my decisions, but my body was just like, okay, you don't need this anymore.

Right.

How I shop is different. I go to the farmer's market for my food. I'm eating seasonally now. I have 3 TerraCycle boxes in my house to recycle the plastics that I have. I try to buy clothes from companies that actually help the environment. Because as I become more and more in tune with what I'm doing with my purchases, I have to show up differently.

Talk about a pivot. I don't know that you were thinking that that was—

Yeah, it is.

But it is, right? I mean, it's a major pivot to vow something and then to not just say it but to really allow for the next steps to take place. And you didn't know, of course, that's the wonder of the pivot anyway, right? Yeah. We're so unaware of where that all leads. I mean, when I wrote that book with that title some years ago, as part of the book, I talked about how resilience is an element of the pivot, creating— being resilient is an element of the pivot. What I realize now as well is that To be resilient, you also have to sort of be a serial pivoter these days. You know, you can't make small changes. And by pivot, for those that don't— haven't read the book or whatever, don't know my— the definition anyway that I'll share with people, it's that you have this capacity to innovate or to improvise. You have this capacity to make small changes in direction. Yeah. And to do that, there's a lot of it that comes from guidance. It's a lot of it that just comes from your instincts, right? Your sort of gut feeling about things, right?

Yeah.

And that's clearly— you followed a lot of that guidance along your path.

I did. I did. It's fascinating. Like, I remember the time— it's a perfect example— 4 months ago when my body decided I was done with chicken. My tongue— tongues had consciousness— but my tongue had a consciousness. And it sounds so weird, but tongue was like, Yeah, I just don't like that anymore. Like what? It's like it was a texture. It was like, okay, we're done. This is so fascinating, tongue. I didn't know you could communicate like that. Like, I didn't realize that was— it was just such an awakening in terms of like how much my body communicates with me if I choose to tune into it. Our bodies are constantly talking to us. And they will guide you. That's how your intuition comes through. Mine is very emphatic right now because I've been practicing this for so long that if my body is just like, yeah, no, we're done with this, I just have to go because I know what's going to happen is I'm going to have to deal with physical pain if I don't change.

Yes. So I would love to— because you and I, before we turned on the video today, we were saying that resilience is a big part of the, again, how it is that you are able to pivot and also as part of being resilient. I think you've got to, if you haven't yet sort of embraced the skills, these tools for making quick changes, small changes even, the kind of changes you can make in 10 seconds often, right, as a person. I'd love to get your sense of what resilience has meant to you. How have you cultivated resilience?

You know, it's interesting because resilience Now feels like tuning into what my soul truly needs and not being swayed from it. So it doesn't feel hard. Sometimes it's a practice, like some mornings I'll get up and I don't do my daily meditation and I feel it. The resilience is tied to practicing and bringing more awareness into the communication I'm constantly receiving and less to what my head thinks it wants to do, because my head loves to talk. My mind loves to talk.

So your definition of resilience or your experience of resilience has a lot to do with listening to your body?

Yes.

And listening to these sort of more subtle forms of communication that you can Tune into when you're present.

And sticking with it.

And sticking with it.

Yeah, like in terms of like if my body says you're done with coffee and I still like, yeah, I still want some coffee, I'm going to deal with the consequences of it. So just staying aligned with that piece of me that is calling me to a higher sense, like, okay, honey, you're going to be having white and green tea chai now that you're making. Okay. It's showing up every single week and making that and just changing that behavior.

Didn't know I was going to be doing that.

Didn't know I was going to be doing that.

Thanks for letting me know.

Yeah. And yeah, there's ego fighting, right? Because when you have change and it's big, like I could say that I've given up what in American society is like big food groups, right? I only have plants. Well, geez, that's not a lot according to that old thought process. But how many thousands of plants are there that I can eat now that I didn't even know existed because I was too busy focusing on the American diet?

Yeah, very interesting. Rituals are a big part of how we stick to things. You know, like you said, staying with something is not as easy as it might seem. And I think pretty much as we're leading or being led into the end of the year and coming back to that same beginning point, which is beautiful, an ending and a beginning all at the same time, that people will set their intentions. They'll set those resolutions. They'll make those resolutions that they won't keep for very long. I mean, studies are different, but— Yeah. By the end of January, some ridiculous percentage of the folks that made a resolution have already broken it. So you go, okay, that's sort of a recipe for insanity, I guess, because every year you expect it to be different but you do the same thing. So share with us, if you could, how it is that you've ritualized some aspect of your day or any other area of your life that you go, wow, that, that's really helped me.

Yeah, well, first I want to share, um, last year I didn't set the intention for the year one of my friends challenged us to look at something that was in our purview for 24 to 48 hours and then paint it. Well, Portland has this amazing band of crows and they fly— thousands of crows that fly around the city. And that weekend the crows were hanging out in my neighborhood and I saw thousands of crows and I was like, well, I guess that's a sign. And I ended up painting a Pacific Northwest version of a crow that reminds me regularly that I chose to listen to the sign, and the spirit animal of crow is spiritual. So this year has been incredibly spiritual for me, and it's sitting across from my couch, so I see it every morning. So that's my morning reminder. My daily ritual is I have my morning chai, and then I pull my cards and I do my daily readings. I meditate. And over the course of the day, I do a practice called tapping my cortices, which is tapping in— it's balancing your left and right brains. And it's something that my mentor taught me. I'll turn— I wonder if I could do this— and then tap over my chest and then tap in the middle of my head, tap on my chest. This is so— I can't do this with my hands. And then tap on the side of my head there and there and there and there and there. And then on my abdomen. And then I shake my hands out and it balances your left and right brain. It gives you a sense to get out of your head and into a calmer state. I also put my hands on my heart and take a deep breath in and out when I feel like I'm ungrounded.

Mm-hmm.

I have a grounding pad under my desk to make sure that I am grounded regularly so I can actually hear things. I perform a morning ritual blessing the land. And in evening, at night, I use this sage incense pretty regularly to clear out any negative energy I might be having. And at night, I do a very long gratitude list before I go to bed.

Yeah.

And it just keeps me centered. Whenever I feel like I'm getting out of whack, I do my practices. I do, you know, my hands on my heart. I'll do tap cortices and just set the intention of being present.

Right. So you return to those. The rituals become a Very much a support. And I think that's what is really intriguing to me about them as well, is that they just provide a great level of continuity and continuous support. So, you can go back to them again and again. They don't have to be the same ones all the time.

Mm-hmm.

Because I think, as you pointed out, different things will come up during the day and something here or there might take you out. It could be physical, it could be emotional, it could be Something in the head. It can be anything really. But having a series of things that you can go to, ritualized things that you've done before and that you want to be doing, make you feel better in the moment, really powerful. Mm-hmm. Like for example, something as simple as you can feel that you're just a little not all in your body or you're not grounded or you're feeling anxious. Anxiety or something else that just does not feel great, you could pause for a moment, hands on your heart, take a few deep breaths and feel grounded immediately. It's fairly instantaneous thing that happens. I really hope you're enjoying this episode of the Change Proof Podcast. If you've not yet gone out and gotten your own copy of It's not too late. You can get your copy right now by going to changeproof.com and not only getting the book and all the bonuses there, but getting access to our proprietary resilience assessment tool. It'll just take you 3 minutes to do, and it's something that will really help you to utilize the book even more effectively to create practices and rituals and habits that will help you to be resilient. habits that will increase your mental, emotional, physical, and even spiritual resilience for the long term. Again, go to changeproof.com to get your copy today.

Yeah.

And I also think it's just something that we don't always— folks ignore or are just unaware of.

I think our society is really good at distractions.

Yeah. I mean, look, there isn't a lot of these kind of practices or things in early childhood that were taught. Like when you're feeling anxious, when someone or some situation has put you in a place where you're in fear mode, you know, there's a fight or flight response or you just feel the— feel fear. There's that old expression in that old book, you know, feel the fear and do it anyway. Well, there's a thing that happens before doing it anyway. Yeah. And that is a moment, like you say, where you become present and you become grounded and you get to decide whether you're going to do something or not do something.

Mm-hmm.

I don't know that anybody wants to be reacting continuously from a place of sort of— I would say reacting is a response that doesn't involve being grounded.

Mm-hmm.

Whereas responding to something, you are grounded. You're making a conscious decision.

Right.

To do or not to. So I really appreciate you sharing that with us. You're welcome. Yeah. And these are easy things. I love it when it's easy.

Me too.

Maybe it's I'm partly lazy, but it's also partly that anything that's easy is, you know, you don't have many excuses for why you don't do something that's easy.

Right.

If it's hard, if you think it's hard, your mind will find a great series of Convenient excuses for not, you know, not going after it. But as we end this conversation, which I've really enjoyed, I thank you so much.

You're welcome.

Beautiful. The waking ritual, I think, is just like you put it, that you put so much gratitude in your conscious and your subconscious right before bed. Brilliant. Beautiful. I also love to wake and immediately plant those seeds, and you probably do something quite similar, but I'll ask you this question. Did you wake up today?

I did. I woke up in a beautiful way today. I felt all of my chakras spinning, and it's a practice I do to, um, help planet. So I have all of my chakras awake, and then they spin, and they spin faster and faster and faster until they get to this white light. And then I feel that energy spread out from me, eventually across the world, and then I feel the world Increase that energy until it gets to a white-hot sensation, and then it feels like the ending in Day of the Life by the Beatles, you know, where they have that confidence violin upswing and they go boom, and it has like this sonic boom, and then all of a sudden they feel this entire planet covered with peace and love.

Yeah, thank you for doing that. Yeah, well, that's beautiful. Well, yeah, we got it right today because we got to wake up We got it right.

We did.

Yeah, and we were supported and loved and blessed in so many ways just by reason of the fact that we got to wake up. And that's something that we, any of us, wherever you are in this moment, you've— you're listening means you're awake, even though it might be that the coffee hasn't kicked in just yet, but you have given up the coffee as Erica has, but The— this is the truth. It's just the truth that we have a lot to be grateful for. And I love these 4 words. It's a thing. It's been a thing for me for a lot of years now, which I wake up, I feel that gratitude, and then I say, I love my life. I love my life. Erica, do you love your life?

I do. I'm very blessed to have the life I have.

I feel that. Thanks for being a guest on the show today.

Oh, you're so very welcome. Thank you so much for having me.

Way cool. Our beautiful community, you're out there. You're out there. You know what to do. If you want more, please subscribe or check out other episodes and make that decision for yourself, whether it's something you really want to engage in. We've got episodes, new ones airing every single week, which is cool, and a whole long list of ones that we love from the past as well. Appreciate your comments. So, if you'd like to leave a comment, go to adammarkel.com/podcast. podcast and leave a comment and I will respond. You can join us on Facebook at the Start My Pivot group on Facebook and you can leave comments there as well and I'm really happy to receive them. Get the feedback, it's like oxygen and it helps us and it helps also to create that relationship. So I will say ciao for now and again, Erica, thank you so much for being an amazing guest.

Oh, thank you so much, Adam.

Thanks for listening, everyone. We hope you now have the tools and greater insights to navigate your own pivot. Help us inspire others by sharing this episode and leaving your comments over at adammarkel.com/podcasts. For more tips, strategies, and support as you consciously pivot into a new business and lifestyle you love, join our Pivot Community on Facebook at pivotfb.com.