AJ LaPorteLead Solutions Architect at HubSpot

Nick's Imposter Syndrome | Devs:After Dark

23 Oct 2026 · 1 min

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In this candid monologue from the Devs:After Dark episode, Nick recounts a moment early in his new job when, during a lunch break, he felt completely overwhelmed. He describes sitting in his car, his mind feeling like mush, as he tried to make sense of five or six new concepts he was learning. While he grasped each idea conceptually, he had no clear picture of how they interconnect or contribute to the project's overall architecture. This experience encapsulates his imposter syndrome, highlighting the anxiety of not knowing how disparate pieces fit together in a real-world engineering context.

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And I'll never forget the one day, like, it was probably like a week or so into the job, or I can't remember exactly how far in, but far enough where, uh, on my lunch break, I just went into my car and sat down and I was like, how does this all come together? I don't understand. Like, I'm like, I'm sitting there in my head, just like, it felt like my brain was just mush. But that was literally the question I was asking myself for an entire lunch hour in my head was just like, Mm-hmm. How do all of these, like, I'm learning like these like 5 or 6 new things that are, I'm understanding it conceptually, but I have no idea how these things talk to each other, work together, or make this final thing that we're working on as whatever the project was at the time, right?