Alisa Cohn walks through a six-step script for giving difficult feedback. Start by stating your purpose, then present concrete observations, explain the impact, invite collaboration on solutions, listen to their side, and get a clear commitment to change. The key is factual language and partnership over blame.
Chapters
Giving difficult feedback is, you know, difficult. So I'm going to give you a little script you can use to help you deliver difficult feedback. So let's say that somebody isn't meeting their deadlines on a regular basis. You can say, hey Charlie, I want to talk to you about deadlines. My observations are that you've committed to meeting these certain deadlines here, here, and here. And then when those times come, I don't see the work. Not only that, but I don't even hear from you in advance that I'm not going to see the work. Everyone is counting on you to meet your deadlines. How can we work together to make sure that you're able to set realistic deadlines and then meet them consistently. And then listen to what they have to say. Part of giving feedback is also being able to hear their point of view and most importantly, getting a commitment about what specifically they're going to do to change the behavior.