“This Is How You Love Yourself" (Coaching Session Breakdown)

We just released a video on the YouTube channel that people are loving. It's a coaching session that you did with a kid who said he hasn't felt good in years. And I'd love to just dive into this video and do a breakdown to see the patterns that you see and how they might be showing up for people who are watching this and how they can learn from this in their own lives.

Yeah, that would be fantastic. There is, if I recall correctly, there are some very cool patterns in here that really touch a tremendous amount of us, especially if we didn't get that kind of care that we need from our parents.

All right, let's dive in.

I keep getting overwhelmed by bodily sensations, or you might call them emotions. They're extremely uncomfortable and they make it very difficult to rest.

Okay, hold on a second. Hold on a second. So you can see I'm smiling right now, and the reason I'm smiling is because he's clearly reading. And so what I know— so what I know is that he's in his head, he's not fully in his body. He's clearly concerned that he's gonna describe it wrong, and which makes me immediately realize that he's in a deep self-reliance pattern, right? You can already tell, like, it's very important to him that he gets it right. So the, the pattern that he's in is like deeply self-reliant, and, and that means that he's not particularly getting the, the, the like the care, he didn't get the care that he really needed or wanted as a, when he was younger. And so, so all I can tell all that, but I also just find him unbelievably adorable. So, so you can tell by the smile on my face, like, I just, I'm just, I'm already enamored with this, with this kid. And I think one of the things in self-reliance is that it's really hard for somebody to see when you're in a self-reliance pattern, it's very hard to see that when people are enamored by you, like, because you think you have to keep on proving yourself because you had to as a kid when you were younger. And so I think he's, you know, that's just all, all of that can be seen just almost immediately just with him reading and the way that he's reading. It's not just the read, it's the way that he's reading. Like, there's— he's really trying to get it right.

Yeah.

It's also really cool just to see how much he cares.

Oh my gosh.

Like he spent the time to prepare for this.

Yeah. Yeah.

And there's a lot of conscientiousness and like, on the other side of wanting to get it right, there's just so much care.

Absolutely. Yeah. It's a beautiful— and I think it's often hard for the person who's doing it to see their own care.

It's probably felt more as anxiety than care, but there's a deep care.

Worry is a sign of devotion. It's not maybe the healthiest sign of devotion, but it is a deep, like, anything you worry about, you're devoted to. And it's like, as soon as you can see that, oh, my anxiety is just my devotion, it's something, something gets relieved in it.

Love that.

Yeah.

Well, shall we move on?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Let's get past the first, what was that? 10 seconds.

Yeah.

They're extremely uncomfortable and they make it very difficult to rest or to even function. Um, I really wanna know what I can do about them cuz every single time I try to feel my feelings the same way right now, I'm trying to feel everything. I'm trying to feel my hands. I'm trying to feel, um, this whole experience.

Okay, pause again.

Yeah.

So he's trying the same way he tried to prep for the—

Exactly. He's telling me again, he's like, "I try to do everything you're telling me to do," right? Like somehow or another, like, again, it's like that quest for love, that quest for approval, but it's also the deep care. It's also the devotion, but it's also this deep self-reliance, right? So you can just see, you know, and yeah, this, I just want to live old enough to see what happens with this kid, 'cause it's gonna be amazing.

Even I'm shaking right now. It feels so distressing and overwhelming. Um, and I've been using mindfulness, but I'm just so curious. I, I, emotions are just so bad. I'm with you.

I'm with you. Do me a favor. The thing that you're reading down on your thing, what are you reading from?

It's a, it's a Notion document.

Cool. Can you throw it onto the bed behind you?

Okay.

Great. Cool.

Just noticing he's giggling, laughing. Joyful right now, but he just showed up like, I haven't felt good in years, and he's clearly having a good time with you right now, right?

Yeah. And, and he was tickled by, oh wait, I don't need to get this right-ish. Like, there's something like that his world got. The other thing that you can tell about him at this point is like, he moves really quickly to one thing to another. That's usually a sign of intelligence and some ADHD potentially, but but he's moving, he can't even particularly complete a thought before telling me another thought. And so this is something that's gonna make this learning experience or this kind of learning more challenging for him. So the mindfulness is great that he's doing, but slowing him down so he can really feel the thing. So he's clearly feeling, Even though he says he's having a hard time feeling, he's literally telling me while his body is shaking that his body is shaking. Somebody who can't feel wouldn't be able to do that. But what's happening is that his mind is coming in with narrative so quickly, so hard that it bypasses, like it tricks him into thinking that he's not feeling.

And the shaking, another sign of devotion, another sign of the care. Yeah. Why would you be shaking if there's not something important?

Going on. Exactly.

Yeah.

Okay, let's— yeah, let's see what's next.

Now tell me, what's your question? Like, from your heart, from your heart, what's your question?

I want to feel good. I haven't felt good in years. That's what it is. I haven't felt peace or safe or good inside or happy in years.

So hold on a second.

This is—

so now he's told us really everything. He's told us that he can feel, that he is feeling. He told us that all that he's doing is to try to feel good. All the preparation, all the— like his devotion is to how do I feel better as a person? How do I love myself? How do I care about myself? Like, that's what he's actually deeply devoted to. And that's what he's worried about. And he's using all that self-reliance that he's learned to, you know, get good grades or do whatever he does, you know, instigate, instigate whatever he instigates as a high schooler or whatnot. You can just tell that's what it's all for. And so, and he touches into that emotion so quickly, it tells you that he has done some work, meaning, you know, when I was his age in that pattern, I could never have done that, never could have touched into the emotions that he's touching into.

Right. Mindfulness wasn't a thing I was talking about at this age. Exactly.

Exactly.

Yeah.

Okay, let's see what's next.

I feel tears coming.

Yeah.

So you don't feel good right now? No, no, no part of you feels good right now.

Yeah.

So I don't want you to feel your whole body. I just want you to look into your body to the part of yourself that feels the worst. Not the story, but the visceral sensation that feels the worst in your body right now.

I don't know how to do that. I've been listening to all your podcasts and I can't find out how to do that.

Well, you just told me you don't feel good, so there must be some that you noticed that, or you couldn't tell me that you don't feel good?

I just do mindfulness for this whole experience. That's all I know how to do right now.

Okay, hold on, slow down. You said, I don't feel good. How did you know that?

I can just feel it. I don't even need to do anything. Great.

Yeah, that— so the thing that you're feeling that doesn't feel good, right? What's the part of your body that feels the worst right now?

Okay. I'm pausing for a second so that you can watch his mind. This is what's happening. His mind is moving so quickly. He has so many stories. He's of the age where he still believes all those stories, that he's ignoring the reality that he has told me that he's shaking, that he doesn't feel good, that he's got tears coming. He clearly can feel his body, but his mind is coming so quickly. So slowing him down so that he can like not speed bump things with his mind is gonna be critical because that's part of the work that has to be done if you're doing the deeper internal work is to slow down, not just pay attention to your thoughts, but pay attention to the, and to the body. And typically, especially in the early stages of the self-reliance pattern, what you see is that the mind is deeply relied on because feeling the feeling, which is somebody's not there for me, who should be there for me, is so devastating that you just go to the mind for any kind of relief. It's to get away from that emotional experience, which is what he's touching in on with this deep sadness.

Yeah, so that's, that's fascinating. I just want to double-click on that. So the, the emotions are happening.

Yes.

The full experience. And this call, he's gone from shaking, sadness, there's been joy, there's been all kinds of emotion and sensation that clearly is happening for him.

Yeah.

But what's happening is before he even registers that that's happening, he's gone to his mind for a memory or a story.

Yeah.

To live in the story of the problem.

Right.

And what you're saying is that that story has actually protected him from feeling in the past. Correct. And now it's the problem is now that he's using that story not to feel the thing that he wants to feel and he's prepared and come to the session to work on. Right.

And the story in a self-reliant pattern is always the same version of I'm not doing something right. I'm not good enough. I haven't figured it out. I need to do something more. That's always the story in the self-reliant pattern. And so, which I won't believe any of, because it's not particularly true, especially this guy's like, I'm doing mindfulness, like, clearly, he is doing a ton. And he's doing it at this age. So, but that's always the story in the self-reliant pattern is I don't, I can't, I don't get it. I don't understand. I still need to do something more. It's all very I thinking. It leads to usually a deep depression, but, uh, it's always I thinking, and it's always, what do I have to do? What did I not do? And so you'll notice all of his, all of his stories, most likely, or most of them, are going to revolve around that.

It's, it's like this, this area. Great. Like this area. Great.

So here's what I want you to do. I want you to go and hang out with that part. This part right here. I just want you to just spend time with it for a minute, like focus on it.

Put my awareness, like Eckhart Tolle would say, right? Awareness.

Yep.

Yep.

Just put your awareness in it. Yeah.

Yeah. I feel shaking. Yeah.

Great. I see. Yeah. You don't have to narrate anything until I ask, cause it'll slow it down a bit.

Okay. For sure. Yeah.

So just hang out in that for a moment. And then what is it that you What do you want from, say, your mom and your dad right now? What would you want? Not just generally, what do you want from your mom and dad?

Yeah. Um, I would say love.

Great. Okay. So I want you to love that thing. Go back to it, pay attention to it, and I want you to love it exactly the way that You want love from your mom and dad. All the patience, not needing it to change. Don't forget to breathe.

He's not doing the thing that a lot of people do when they're meditating, which is to bypass. So he actually said, oh, to do the thing that like Eckhart Tolle said, and then he actually sits with it and there's a little bit of a bypass and then I'm like, oh, what is it to love it? And all of a sudden, whatever that bypass is, is gone, which means that it's not like a deeply set-in pattern in his system. And it tells you how emotionally and what I would call is like energetically sensitive he is. So all of this is happening. So he's actually really fortunate that it hasn't turned into the rigidity that can sometimes happen with meditation. Uh, and so he's amazing. He's still holding something back. I don't know, I can't remember if I address it, but you can see he's still holding something back. So let's see what happens.

Yeah, it almost looks like there's a little bit that he's enduring it.

Yeah, exactly. Yeah, and he's going kind of in and out of loving it to mindfulness. You can see it like—

so here's the question: which do you want more, to feel good or to love yourself?

I feel good.

Okay. What's making you smile right now?

Um, because it felt like from, from what I've heard from the many podcasts, like the podcast Love Over Defense, or if you can't love the feeling, love the resistance. I was expecting you to, um, I know you're cool with any answer, but I kind of felt like the answer, uh, that you were looking for, even though you probably weren't. Was to love myself.

Looks— it seems a little bit there like he wants to please you, or has like— he's like, there's a certain answer I was supposed to have. I didn't have that answer. And he's like testing the implication of that in relationship with you. Does that seem like something that's happening for you?

Yeah, absolutely. There's that. And, and again, his like mind is operating faster than his his— then his mind is convincing him not that he's feeling what he's feeling. So I've already seen like, oh, there's a smile. And, and he has this whole story about like, I shouldn't, but I should. I wouldn't, but I would. I know that you wouldn't really care, but I think you might care. I have an answer. And so all of that is occurring. And so I don't know actually what I do next, but I can tell where my focus is right now is What is he like? How do I, how do I see, how do I help him see that he's actually, he gets it all, his mind is just getting in the way? That's the main thing. But there is a little bit, correct, that self-reliant pattern of like, are, are you going to be happy with me?

For sure. What made you smile around that? Because the truth is, you could have been scared. Oh my gosh, Joe's gonna be mad at me. You could have been like defiant. No, I want to feel good because you're going to tell me I have to love myself. But you didn't. You smiled. What made you smile?

I'm not scared of anything. I don't have anything to lose. I'm depressed. I literally have depression. I have nothing to lose. I just want to feel good.

Huh. You have nothing to lose.

I feel like I have nothing to lose.

No, that means you have freedom.

Exactly.

How many people do you think are on this call looking for freedom?

Wow, I think everyone wants that, so I'd say everyone.

And you have it, but I'm not happy. So what's the difference between freedom and happiness?

Um, I think happiness feels good, and I don't know if freedom— my experience has been freedom, it feels okay but not good.

Okay, so the other thing that's happening is that you're kind of perpetually giving me a happy face while telling me you don't feel good. Like, somehow I'm happy. Say again?

I actually, like, I actually kind of smile. Like, I'm in this conversation with you right now and I'm happy now. I'm happy. I wasn't before, but as I'm smiling, I'm happy.

Okay, how did that happen?

Um, it's just my natural personality. I'm just a smiley, happy person, but I feel so sad inside.

Wait, wait, wait.

So he just flipped entirely. He's like, I'm a naturally happy person, I'm happy right now, can't you see?

Yep, totally, 100% flip. Yeah, and it's again what his mind is telling him versus what his body is actually feeling.

Right?

So his mind is telling him he's— there's something wrong. Just the perfect self-reliant pattern. There's something wrong. He has to do something, and which does create depression. So I'm not disagreeing with— but it's literally what he's listening to. Is he listening to his body? Is he listening to his mind? And it's interesting to see, even has enough intelligence to know that that's where he has to spend his time. He's doing mindfulness, which is a lot of time in the body. He's doing our work, which is a lot of time in the body. And so there's this natural wisdom in him, and he's just fighting it with his mind every step of the way. Like that. And so that's, to me, that's the main, that's the main place that I can see his opportunity, the biggest opportunity for him. And I think for a lot of self-reliant people is working with the emotions and with the body.

Yeah.

And something I'm noticing right now is we're about halfway into this 14-minute session.

Yeah.

We're seeing the cracks. He's seeing the other side of it.

Yeah.

And I'm also curious just to see over the next 7 minutes how this session moves in such a way that this brings a lasting change. Yeah. A lasting seeing.

I think for most likely, with the way this session is gonna work for him, is it's gonna show him something that he will then, his mind will convince him that he doesn't feel. I'm talking over like the years, but it'll be like this North Star. So immediately he'll see it, he'll feel good for a couple of days, then he'll convince himself that he didn't see it. He'll figure, he'll come back saying, "How do I get what I want?" But it'll have been there. It'll be this North Star. That will allow him to orient. It'll allow that change to be deep and long-lasting, but most likely he's going to fight himself along the way. This is an entrenched pattern.

So yeah, yeah, my natural personality, I'm just a smiley, happy person, but I feel so sad inside. There's so much sadness.

So hold on a second, let's just look at the thing. What just happened is you hung out, you loved this aspect of yourself before, you weren't happy. 'Now you're happy.' Uh, wow.

Oh my goodness, you are right. You're actually right. Yeah, I'm wrong. You're right.

And you can see the pattern again. 'I'm wrong. You're right.' That's what his mind does. His mind is constantly correcting himself because that's how somebody who needed to rely on themselves instead of their parents— this is how they learn to operate.

Yeah. Another instance of that relational piece showing up with you too, because there's the way that he relates to himself. And you brought that up with, you know, if you love this feeling the way that you wanted love yourself.

Yeah.

But now he's bringing it into relationship with you. So there's a way that you are providing that in this context. Correct. So that he can see the way that he can provide to himself.

Yes. And he's interpreting whatever I do into something that he has to do to please me or to get it right.

Right.

And I'm imagining that the way that you're responding is somewhat different than the way he used to get responded to.

I'm hoping.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So there's also something happening. You have this story in your head about how you're unhappy that persists even if you're happy and like on a moment-to-moment basis. Do you see what I'm saying? Right?

Yeah.

So there's moments where you're happy, but you're like, no, I'm unhappy. I'm an unhappy person. This is what I do. I'm unhappy. But then you don't, you're not noticing the actual moments of happiness.

You're right. Cause the feeling of unhappiness feels overwhelming. Yeah, you're right though.

So do me a favor. Try to feel happy right now.

Every single time I've tried, I'll try again. It's just when I feel happy, I notice when I try to feel happy, I relax my body. I, I, I slow down. I become more aware of sensory perceptions. Yeah.

So just do it. Just show me.

Okay. Trying to feel happy. There's a stillness, like Eckhart Tolle says.

Yeah. So you figured out how to be present in an attempt to feel happy.

I did. I read All the Power of Now and all that. That's right.

Yeah. Okay. And, and then, but now let's go back again to feeling the part of you that is most in pain and your job is to love it the way you wanted to be loved, want to be loved by your parents.

I always— I mean, I tried to do it earlier, but I've always had confusion when you said love, how to do that. I heard welcome. I don't know how to do it though.

You did it.

I did it? So literally just put my attention there?

No, and then you loved it. You didn't ask me how to do it. You didn't ask me how to do it the first time, so I'm not gonna buy that you don't know how to do it.

Okay, okay, okay. So there, this is like the beginning of— it's been there a little bit, but there is like an attention-seeking thing going on here as well. Which is like, I'm going to create a problem so that we get to continue to be in this relationship. Like, there's like, which is usually the unresolved thing, which is there's a problem, I need to take care of it myself. I want my parents' help. I've been wanting my parents' help for a long time, or caregiver, whoever it is, but I'm not going to get it. And so there's a way in which that itch never got satisfied. So it gets amplified in other relationships, which ends up being a golden algorithm for this guy, which means that like grasping for the attention is often going to push it away. Instead of him trusting that he is awesome, amazing, that people are enamored with him, instead of trusting all that stuff, he's going to keep on like hunting for that, seeking for that validation for that, particularly by having a problem that he— somebody can help him solve, to be cared for in that way. And so you can see that pattern also, a very self-reliant pattern kicking in here. And, um, yeah, just something to know for anybody else who's in this pattern. That's something to know, that because you never got the help that you really needed, there's this very young help that you're still looking for that nobody can give you. Because it's the kind of help you give to a young person, not a young adult person or an adult person.

Another piece that just happened there was that he's like, "I don't know how to love." Yeah. Everybody knows how to love, but a lot of us have experienced love tied together with other things that we don't want. And so the idea of, "I don't know how to love," implies that there's been a lot of confusion in his system around what love is.

Yeah, yeah, absolutely. That's definitely part of the pattern and part of generally the self-reliant pattern, but really a very, very across-the-board human pattern that whatever our parents did while they were loving us, or while they weren't loving us very well, gets tied to love, whether that's abuse or criticism or shame or performance. And in this case, probably performance is a big part of what he, you know, having to perform was part of getting love.

Yeah. All right, let's see what happens.

I'll try to get—

okay, so just act towards it the way that you wanted your parents to act towards you when you were in pain.

Sounds good.

I notice you're resisting this thing. You don't need to resist it. It's not going to destroy you.

How am I resisting it?

I just noticed you're—

Oh, whenever I— when I tense up?

Yeah, you're like covering your mouth. You're trying to like not have the full expression of the sadness. Like somehow in your mind it's wrong to be just fully sad.

Oh, it's just, it's just because I have, I had neighbors and I don't want to just be too loud, that's all.

Fuck your neighbors.

Feels so good. This feels like what I've been looking for. Yeah, that feels so good. I love myself unconditionally. Yeah, it really feels what I've been looking for my whole life.

Yeah, that's what we're looking for. So I want to share a couple of concepts with you just to help you in your journey.

You're—

you, you've got it. I see that you've got it. There's two concepts that are really helpful. The first is when you start to love yourself, all the unloved parts come up to be loved. And so you're like, wait, I'm loving myself and now this is here? Now, oh my God, I thought everything was great and now this thing has shown up? That's because it's coming up to be loved.

So that's a fish example, right? The fishing example. I know what you're talking about. I heard on a podcast. Great. Cuttlefish. There you go.

Yeah. So that's the first, the first thing to know. And then the second thing to know is there's no rush. You'll all, you'll be there to be loved for a long, long time. So you can just like do it at like the most enjoyable pace.

You know, like you're, you're sort of catching the next thing he would do, which is to make this into a task. Yeah.

Another thing to get right.

Another thing to not be doing right and be failing at.

And you can immediately watch him, like, the relief in his face when I say it, and the sadness that kicks. Yeah, like that. Like, oh fuck, I don't have to abuse myself like that. And I don't even think it's fully conscious, but he just— his reaction to that was like, oh, like, I, I don't— I'm like good the way I am. Just even just the scent of it. Allowed him to have that experience.

Yeah. And this is part of what I was alluding to earlier when I was like, let's see how the session proceeds in a way that makes this stick. Because a lot of people are wondering when they see these sessions, does this last or is it just, you know, a carnival trick?

Right.

And this is the integration that's happening right now. The very next step in the evolution is being rolled out on the red carpet for him to see and relate to in a way that might be a couple of steps ahead of what would have happened otherwise.

Yeah.

And he'll, as is necessary, I would even say, that he will pendulate. He will go back and forth between convincing himself that he can't feel, convincing himself that he's not lovable, to seeing it, to loving himself. Like, that is just kind of part of the experience. But I guarantee you, if I talk to this guy in, what, 5 years, he will be loving himself better than most, you know, 50-year-olds. 'Cause he's there, he's dedicated, he's determined, he's ambitious, internally ambitious, and he's smart, and he's not touched it.

All right, marking my calendar for 5 years to reach back out to this guy and do a follow-up.

Exactly.

You know, if it starts overwhelming, then you can like take a break, go take a walk, hang out with friends. And then when you got a little space, it feels good, then start loving yourself again. There's no rush. You're going to be just as lovable, I guarantee, just as lovable in 20 years as you are today.

You can try again. But how, how do I know when it's really hard for me to know when it's too overwhelming? I'm too broke. I tried to make money for the Great Decisions course, but I missed it because I'm a broke 18-year-old. How can I make a good decision for when it's too overwhelming or when I should go deeper into feeling it and love it?

Just do the thing. Your nature is to go into the thing, so your job is to just make sure you're enjoying going into the thing. If it becomes unenjoyable, take a break.

That's it.

You can trust your, your sense of enjoyment because you, you have the tendency to investigate.

Thank you so much. I love you. Thank you.

I love you too. Thank you.

Wow, love that kid.

Love that kid.

Love that kid. My goodness, I can see why this thing is popular. He's just so— he's just so sincere. Yeah, thing that I think is important is like when you're working on a pattern and you have a breakthrough like this, there is something that has changed that is undeniable. I was talking to somebody about this just the other day and He was talking about these two experiences that he had that were like awakening experiences that had come and go and passed. And he's like, "I want it back." And I just asked him the simple question. I said, "If those hadn't come and gone, where would you be today?" And he said, "Not here, not doing what I'm doing, not—" my life would not be as good. And what we typically recognize is, oh, this thing has happened and I want it back. But we don't recognize is that this thing has happened and it has changed my life irrevocably from this point forward. And so when you find yourself having that kind of breakthrough like this young gentleman had, It's really important to realize that's going to change your life no matter what. And your brain is going to try to convince you, "Oh, how do I keep it? How do I get it? How do I get it back? Where did it go?" Instead of, "Oh, I'm still talking about this thing. This thing still had a huge impact on my life. I can't see the world the same way. My trajectory, my course, my orientation, where I'm headed is changed forever because of it." And that's an incredibly powerful thing. And it happens like that for a reason, because we can't just like disintegrate a personality overnight. And so, this gives us like the most efficient path to get there. It's not— could you imagine if one day you just like, boom, and you saw the world completely differently, like how hardcore that would be for everything and everybody? And so there's this, this way in which, you know, a flower, you know, blossoms over time. And it's the same thing, there's a blossoming. And, and so if this is— if you're listening to this podcast, you've had one of these moments, highly recommend, like I said to him, is like, how do you just enjoy this unfolding as much as possible? Because that's what makes it as efficient as as it possibly can be. Yeah.

And I'd also add that the blossoming isn't just an individual thing. It's something that is constantly in relation with those around you and in your community, which is one of the reasons why we do this work in community. But also his system has been accurately responding to the world for a period of time, including finding a way out of the system he's been in. Correct. And as he starts to engage with people like you and people like the friends he's taking the Connection Course with and the people that he gets partnered with, then he starts to see and actually impact the world around him in such a way that this change is— the change isn't that fast switch that causes a bunch of disruption. It's something that is in conversation with his world.

Yeah, and brings his world along with him. And then his world supports him in the new version of him. Yeah. Beautiful.

Beautiful. Yeah. I'd like to add one more time, just because we are often talking about the parenting that people didn't receive in these sessions. If you are a parent and Maybe you're the parent of this kid or you see this kid in your own kids and you're feeling like, "Oh, what did I do wrong?" You didn't do anything wrong. This doesn't mean that you are bad parents. Yeah, that's right. We're just exploring dynamics that exist for all of us. Nobody, I don't think anybody has escaped experiences like these to work on through their adult life.

Also, I'll say it, if you notice that as a parent, listen to the Upright Apology podcast and go and apologize to your kids. It's incredibly healing. It's an amazing thing just to acknowledge to your children that this is something that you did and you wish you hadn't done it. And like, that can be so incredibly healing. And so don't let that opportunity pass. Don't have to be wrong about it. That's the whole thing about the upright apology is not to be wrong about it, not to have that shame, but go take advantage of it. It's a, like, it's a massive boon to do that.

Thanks everybody for listening to The Art of Accomplishment. If you enjoyed this episode, please share it with a friend, share it with somebody who you think would get a lot out of it. And as always, we'd love for you to rate and review the podcast And you can always find us on YouTube if you're listening to this on audio. There is the whole video of this session is on YouTube, and we'll put that in the show notes. This show is hosted by myself, Brett Kistler, and Joe Hudson. Munyi Kelly is our producer. This show was edited by Charlie Garcia.