Trading Psychology - A Rarely Discussed Matter That Directly Impacts Your Ability To Move Forward

Hi, Brian McAvoy here with Inside Out Trading. And today's topic is one that's really rarely discussed, yet arguably is probably one of the most important to both you as a person and especially as a trader. See, this really is at the very core of your psyche and more specifically, your ability to move forward, forward in your trading. Now, there are three parts to this brief presentation. In the first part, I'm going to explain what the problem is and how it comes to be. In the second part, I'll explain how it works. And then in the third, I'll explain how to undo the damage that's been done. Because this is something that has affected you. If you've been trading at all, this has affected you. I'll warn you ahead of time, this little story here does have highs and lows. If at some point you start feeling a little down, don't worry, stick with me to the end. It does have a happy ending. Like I said, I'll share with you how to address this matter and attend to it so that it's something that works for you, not against you. Now, as with anything, the best place to start is at the beginning, which really, this whole story starts with you, when you began trading. I mean, obviously you chose trading. You chose to become a trader for a specific something. Maybe you're looking to quit your job and live life on your terms with a lot of freedom, both time wise and financially. Financially, that independence, maybe you're not going to leave your occupation, but you want to do this and provide a better lifestyle for your family. Maybe you just wanted to invest your money in a place better than a mutual fund where you're looking at an easily 6 or 7% a year. You saw that trading offered substantially better. This is why you chose. Like I said, you had a reason, something fairly specific. That was the reason that you chose trading and you chose to become a trader. Now, no matter what your reason why was, when you started out, you had this goal in mind and you were probably pretty jazzed about it, how this was going to transform your life and be the vehicle to get you there and really just improve your prospects for the future. Obviously, though, you didn't just start right out of the gate, right where you wanted to be. More than likely you start off as a beginner, as we all do, and you probably met with a whole lot more disappointment than you did celebration. So you began to try some different things. Once you start off with a common story, as far as how a lot of people start off, they'll either start off with something the friend recommended to them or that they purchased. Maybe it was a course. A lot of people, they'll just rely on their broker at the very beginning because they start off not knowing anything. So you rely on your broker anyway. You started off somewhere and like I said, it wasn't living up to your expectations. You didn't just walk right into the promised land. And with things not being working the way you want it to, you tried some different things, maybe a new system, a new indicator. Indicators are always the big intellectual tease of if I can just find the right combination of indicators, then I'll have that huge edge. And that's one. That's the intellectual appeal of trading. But what happens is you try things and there's lots of things to try. New platform, signals, systems, indicators, like I said, lots of things to try. And you try stuff, you try this, you try that at first. Again, being a beginner, it's a lot of just kind of shooting in the dark, but there's a whole lot of try and fail. You try this and maybe it works at first, maybe it doesn't, maybe it works for a little while, but almost everything, it's a whole lot of try and fail. And that takes a toll on you. See, every time you try something and it doesn't work out, that try and fail has a price. After a while, those disappointments really get harder and harder to get over. And it's not uncommon for a lot of traders. Maybe this includes you, where you get to the point where you're almost paralyzed. You just are so afraid of another disappointment that you're just stuck and you're not really trying anything new anymore. You kind of stay busy with the things that are familiar. Yeah, maybe I'll try a new indicator. Maybe I'll buy a new system or I'll just get back to focusing on being more disciplined. And these are things that you've tried before, unsuccessfully. But like I said, it's that staying busy. But it's familiar. It's not really trying anything new. And this is where you're really starting to hurt yourself. When you're not moving forward and you're not really doing anything to move yourself forward. You see, when you tell yourself that you're going to do something and especially the bigger it is, and then you don't, you're hurting your integrity because you're breaking a promise to yourself. And that's very, very damaging. It's especially true in any area of your life where you've begun a major undertaking like trading. You've got a very specific intention and goal and purpose. And then you stop moving forward, either through inaction or, like I said, just kind of going through the motions. But you're not doing anything again, you're hurting your integrity. See, the inaction, really, it only adds guilt, embarrassment, shame, again, further disappointment in yourself. You're hurting yourself at this point because it may feel safe, the inaction, but the problem is, again, you're hurting yourself because you've broken a promise to yourself and you're doing it again and again and again. While it may keep you safe from failing again, again, it comes at a huge price. Okay, so part three. Here's where it gets better. How do you break this cycle and get things back back on the positive track? Well, the first thing that you really need to do is refresh yourself on what it is, especially in the aspects of it or from the perspectives of why you got into this for other people. Did you get into trading because you're doing it for your spouse or your kids or maybe your grandkids? Do you have philanthropy that you want to be contributing to, charities where you want to be able to help others, and this is your means to do that. Whatever it is, get reconnected with your big why? The main thing that really got you motivated in the first place, get reconnected with that because that's what's going to help you get back up on your own two feet and start taking steps forward again. That's the first thing that you need to do. The other thing is just plain, really neat to decide where you're at right now. It's not where you want to be and say, all right, well, 30 days from now or 60 days from now, 90 days, six months, whatever. Pick a date and say, by this date things are going to be different. This is what's going to happen at this date. Get out the calendar, pick a date, put it on the calendar and say, this is when I'm going to have this, this done. I will have achieved this. You really have to just decide for yourself that, yes, I'm going to do what I need to do. I'm going to bring whatever passion, whatever energy, I'm going to do what I need to do. Real action, real, hey, if I try something new again and it blows up in my face, I don't care. I'm not just going to sit here. Life passes too quickly. You know this. How long have you been trading already? It goes by too quickly to allow yourself to get paralyzed and stop doing things. If nothing else, for yourself, for your own self image, for your integrity. You need to do something, take action. Really, it would be very good for you to start off with small things where you can experience some success. Re establish yourself integrity with yourself. Pick something really small, like tomorrow I'm going to be at my desk on time. Something that you're not doing now, or tomorrow I'm going to, at the beginning of the day, I'm going to review my goals. Pick something very simple where you can say, where you make the decision that you're going to do it and you deliver to yourself on that promise. That's huge because you've got to reestablish your faith in yourself. You can start with baby steps, but have the big goal there in mind as well, because it's baby steps that are going to get you to that big goal. The trip of 1,000 miles begins with a single step that applies here too. The other thing that you need to do really is decide that whatever kind of discomfort you've been experiencing, you're not going to allow that to hold you back anymore. You know that you deserve better. The people that are counting on you for this deserve it. And you're going to make it happen regardless you decide this is going to happen. And I will not accept anything less. The main thing, like I said, set yourself up for success. Take small steps, set small goals, make them happen. Make that decision, do it, follow through on it. Because really, the longer you go with the inaction, the when you're looking at something that you know is going to be helpful and you say no or you hesitate or you put on the back burner, you find other things to do. Every time you do that, the hole gets deeper. The hole that you're stuck in right now. And the way to dig yourself out is with the step by step, follow through, make small decisions, small goals, follow through, deliver to yourself. Now, whether it's my help or somebody else's, do something, get some help. You're not likely to figure this out all by yourself. You're going to need some help. Whether it's my help or somebody else's help. Get the help that you need to get yourself moving forward again and getting closer to your goals and getting to your goals, not just forward progress. Okay, I'll just take baby steps forever. No visible steps. 30 days from now, you want visible steps. You don't want just tiny progress. You want, you want something visible 30 days from now, 60 days from now, 90 days from now, you want visible progress. It's going to happen one day at a time, but pick substantial goals for your medium and longer term goals. Now, like I was saying, whether it's my help or somebody else's, get the help that you need to effect some change. I'm doing this because I know how you feel. If you're stuck at all and it's like leads or like I said, if you've been trading for any time at all, you know what it's like to get strong and after a while you just like, I don't want to try anything anymore. I'm so tired of trying to fail. It's just easier to just kind of hang out here even if it sucks. It's familiar. Make things happen. Now the thing is, if you don't know what to do, if you're sitting here and you're just like, wow, I'm just absolutely lost, shoot me an email. Let me know what your situation is and I'll help you figure it out. If you have a question for me on what you can do, whatever, seriously, send me an email. BrianSideoutTrading.com Send me an email. I'm more than happy to help you out. I will reply to your email, I promise. But like I said, do something. Take some action right now. The action itself will help you personally, it'll help your integrity, it'll help your self image and it will get you moving forward again. I hope you found this video helpful. If you have please share with your friends. If you'd like to Feel free to subscribe to the you know my channel. That way you get notified straight away, you know, when I do publish something new. Also feel free to leave your comments down below. And again, I hope you found this helpful. Brian McAvoy with Inside Out Trading Cheers.