Trading Tips: Trouble with the Spouse?

So what do you do if your spouse really is not very hip on your trading? You know, they just, they're really not on board with you. How do you handle that? Well, that's what we're going to talk about today. I'm going to give you a few pointers here that should prove to be really helpful. These are things that I've recommended in the past that have, that have worked for my clients anyway. So, you know, maybe you've, you know, you've had a rough go with your trading, you've lost some money and it strained the relationship and you know, maybe you took a break, maybe you're still trading, but your spouse just really is not happy with you trading. And that's become a problem between the two of you. First thing you need to do is allay their fears of the past just repeating itself. That's the first thing you got to do because that's really their concern. It's not that they don't want you to be successful. They want you to be successful. They know that it's good for you. They love you, they want you to be successful. They know that it'll do good things for the family if you can get successful. But, but the first thing you have to do is, like I said, put their fears to rest that know you're not just going to repeat the past and continue to lose money. The next thing you need to do is give them a good reason why they should believe you. And that there's a couple of things that go into that because if you tried, you know, maybe several times, maybe it's been over, you know, several years that you've struggled with your trading and, you know, lost some money. They're probably not going to believe you if, you know, you just kind of jump into it all gung ho again and, you know, you're all fired up on, no, I'll make it work this time, they're probably not going to believe you and probably with good reason. Trust me, I know from my own experience and again, working with a lot of clients. So here's a couple of things that you need to do. You need to take a dramatically different approach to it. And here's what I'm talking about. You have to let them know, hey, dear, this time I'm not going to go it alone. It's not going to be just me where, yeah, I might freak out and wind up killing the account again or, you know, just having again a repeat of the path past. I'm going to get some help. I'm going to get somebody to work with so that they can help guide me through the obstacles, help me break the pattern of the past. And that's key. You want to have that pattern interrupt and let them know I'm breaking the pattern of the past by doing something very different. I'm going to get help from a good mentor who's going to guide me and provide me with some accountability, but also help me fix the things that were broken in the past that I wasn't able to fix myself because obviously I hadn't figured it out, there was something I was missing. So I'm going to get some good help, going to get that pattern interrupt, going to get their guidance and have their accountability so that not only, you know, do I have the missing pieces that I didn't have before, I've also got their accountability, their guidance, their support to make it work. I'm going to, you know, I'm going to work with somebody who's invested in my success. And so that's why, you know, you can believe me this time because I'm getting help, I'm getting somebody besides me for the self management of it to fix my trading, to fix whatever it is that I couldn't fix on my own because obviously I hit my own limitations and I wasn't able to, you know, get past them on my own. So if you can do this with your spouse, this will go a tremendously long way to smoothing things over and best of all, probably get your trading working right and actually have it successful, not repeat the past, which is what you want, right? You don't want to just jump back into trading to repeat the past and have it suck and wind up, you know, just further in whole. No, you want it to actually work this time. So here, seriously, this is the way to do it and this is what I do. And I've even gotten on getting gotten on zoom calls with clients and their spouse and had the three of us on the conversation so that I could explain the process that we're going to go through. What I do with my clients to further reinforce their peace of mind about the whole thing is I'll tell them we're going to take a totally risk averse approach. We're going to start small, focus on success and then build from there. But we're going to focus really small and make sure that things are working and we're going to do all of it in a SIM account until everything proves out before $1 ever gets risked again. Everything's going to be working and Working well. So your risk of, you know, more financial, you know, financial strife. No, we're totally guarding against that. And I'm not going to let your spouse, you know, be trading with real money until we are truly there. And you're also going to be involved in the process. So that's what I do is, you know, I'll even, you know, if your spouse says, okay, well, who are you going to be working with? Can I talk to them too? Sure. I'd be glad to get on a call with you and them and we'll get things squared away, like I said, so that they're comfortable and they know that your best interests really are being protected here, both yours and theirs, and that their concerns really can be put to bed. So if this sounds like something that you've struggled with, you'd like some help mending things at home so that you can continue with your trading and do it in a winning manner, a positive, constructive manner so that not only is you're trading it working, but now it's helping your relationship. Because the other thing is when you, when you approach your spouse and you say, I understand your concerns and they're well founded and I'm sincere about, you know, taking care of you and not just, you know, my urge to get back into trading, but I want to make sure that this is a good thing for both of us. That right there lets them know that you care about them and that's really important. And of course, don't just say it to be saying it, you need to be sincere about it. You want, you seriously have to want to approach us in a manner so that, yeah, the past remains the past and does not continue into the future, we're going to interrupt that pattern and here's how I'm going to do it. I'm getting good help. We're going to be totally risk averse and everything's going to prove out that it works before we ever risk any more money. And so, and if you want to talk to them, cool, let's jump on a zoom call all of us and you can ask your questions directly. And like I said, I'm more than happy to do that. So anyway, I hope this has been helpful. What you can do, if you want to talk about this and see if it's right for your situation, go over to InsideOutTrading.com the links in the description down below and go ahead and book a call with me and you know, we can talk. Like I said, if you have any other questions about how this works or how my coaching works, you know, we'll take care of that. And if, you know, your spouse wants to get on the call too cool. I'm more than happy to include them. So. But the main thing is don't repeat the past. If the past has sucked, don't just continue doing the same things that you have. And if the main thing that you've been doing in the past, a common denominator to it all in the past is you're still trying to do it all yourself without the help of a coach or mentor, that's probably the first thing you should take care of. Because again, if you haven't been able to figure it out and it's gone on, you know, for more than a year, you're probably the limiting factor. You've hit your own limits because you can't see what you can't see and you don't know what you don't know. And so you need that outside help to, you know, move beyond those obstacles and your own limitations. So again, I hope this has been helpful. If you want to talk again, book a call with me@insideouttrading.com be more than happy to help you out. Cheers. So do you sometimes struggle with inconsistent results from your trading? You know, a little too much variability in, in what you're getting, as far as, you know, winners and losers, if you like, some help with your consistency. That's my area of expertise. I used to be a quality assurance manager and quality is all about getting consistent results, predictable, reliable results. So if you'd like my help with your trading, swing by insideouttrading.com schedule a call with me, we'll get on, we'll talk about your situation, see if I can help you improve the consistency of your trading results. Talk to you soon.